04x05 - Toon In For Danger

[bunniefuu]

- Okay, now, if we have everyone facing this way,

how big do you think we can make the screen?

- Well, I can fit about seats over here,

which means I can put up

a inch screen over there.

- Woah! Is that big?

- Woah! It's not small.

- Ha ha ha. Ohhh, Nate.

- Uh, Piper...

who's your rugged looking adult friend?

- Oh. This is Nate, my contractor.

Nate, this is my dad, uh...

- Jake. - Good to meet ya, Jake.

- Contractors build houses and stuff.

- I know what a contractor does.

- Well, he's helping me figure out

how we're gonna change this room up

so it can seat people.

- Wh--Why would we need to fit people

in our living room?

- For the premiere of the new cartoon

about Kid Danger and Captain Man!

- I'm so psyched about it.

- Ohhh wow, is that Nate the contractor?

- Hey, Henry. - What is up my man?

- How are ya?

- Ooo, I guess everybody knows Nate.

- Hey, you guys talkin' about the premiere party

for the Captain Man and Kid Danger cartoon?

- Yeah we are.

- I'm so psyched about it.

- So psyched!

- Well, I don't see why they need to make a cartoon

about Captain Man and Kid Danger.

- Excuse me?!? - Dad!

- Okay. If anybody deserves a cartoon made about 'em,

it's...y'know that guy, Kid Danger.

- And Captain Man. - Yeah yeah yeah whatever.

[ watch beeps ]

- Hey, your watch is beepin'.

- Uh, yeah, it is.

I gotta go to work. So uh, I'll see you guys later?

- Bye. - Later Henry.

- I'll keep polishing this bowling pin.

[ beeping continues ]

- Hey Ray, what's goin' on?

- Henry! You've got to come to the Man Cave, right now!

- Why? Somethin' wrong?

- Nope! Everything's great!

- Wh-why do you need-- - Henry!

- Hey! Hehehe... - Hi. Henry! Hiiiii.

- Mrs. Hendricks. - Hey.

- How are you? - Do you like bundt cake?

[ watch beeps ]

- Um...Well I uh... I like cake, but I uh--

- Bundt cake. Bundt.

- Right. Bundt.

- There's a silent "d" in it.

B-U-N-D-T. Bundt.

- Yeah, I got it.

- Anyway...

I need to give this bundt cake to your father.

- Uh...Why?

- He's polishing a bowling pin for me.

- Right. Yes.

He's uh, I think he's still workin' on that, so...

- I have a nephew your age... - Gonna walk home...

- Who's thinking of moving here.

- Y'know, it's funny - His name is Miller...

I would love to talk to you but uh, not that much, so...

oh, he's from Milwaukee! Okay...

I'm takin' this cake.

Alright! I'm here. I'm here. What's going on?

- Tell him! - Ray, tell him!

- Okay! Henry...you know about the cartoon they made--

wait a minute, is that cake? What kinda cake is that?

- Oh yeah, my neighbor lady made it for me.

I think it's a "butt cake" or something--I dunno...

- It's bundt--not butt. - Ew, gross.

- Okay, who cares about the cake?!?

Somebody tell me what everyone's so pumped about?!?

- Okay, Henry...

we are about to watch...

the first episode...

of the cartoon...

about us... right now!

- Wait, for real?

Oh wait, I thought that cartoon doesn't come out

for like two more days! How'd you guys get a copy?

- Ya know the production company that's making it?

- Yeah... - They sent us one by mistake!

- No!

- I told Ray to send it back,

but Schwoz talked him into keeping it

so that we can watch it.

- Ooo, I'm a naughty little boy!

- Hahaha!

- So, can we watch it?

- Yeah, let's go! - Let's do it!

- Okay everyone! Get your popcorn ready!

- Popcorn! - Yeah, some popcorn!

- Now wait... before we play the cartoon,

I just wanna say...

none of this would have been possible...

without me.

- Booo, get off the stage!

- Hey! Hey! Come on!

- Okay! Here comes the cartoon!

- Ooo ooo, this is it, it's starting, it's happening.

- Shhh.

- Doop dee doop dee doop dee doo.

I'm Kid Danger...

and I'm taking this bag of oranges to church.

Doodly doodly doodly doodly doo...

- Uh, hehe, why do I sound like a girl?

- And why are you carrying a bag of oranges?

- Shhh. Shhh.

- Doodly doodly doodly doodly doo...

- Boo!!!

- Ahhh!!!

Uh, who... who are you guys?

- Shut up!

- Let's give Kid Danger a hard time!

- Owww! Owwwie!

Leave me alone!

Help! Captain Man!

Come save me!

- You'd never say stuff like that!

- Yeah, and why am I sucking my thumb?!?

- So far, my favorite character

is the bag of church oranges.

- Shhh shhh, shut up shut up,

here comes the part with me in it.

- Don't suck your thumb!

'Cuz here I come!

Hey! Leave her alone!

- Okay... first, I don't fly...

and second, I'm pretty sure

I don't have a propeller growing out of my head.

- You don't!

- I know I don't!

- Now, this is what you jerks get

for picking on Kid Danger.

Frogs!!!

- I didn't know you could summon flying frogs.

- I can't!

- Are you okay, Boy Danger?

- Boy?!?

- You don't sound like a boy.

- Thanks for saving me, Captain Man.

- You're welcome.

- But how am I going to get my church fruit

to the festival on time?

- I don't know what you just said...

But climb upon me!

- Zoom zoom zoom to the moon moon moon!

- Ahhh!!! That's all I need!

- Okay, I'm sorry, but that was the worst cartoon

I've ever seen in my life.

- It was very terrible. - Pretty bad.

- Frogs, are vegetarians.

- They didn't even remember

to take the fruit to the church festival!!!

- Right! - Ahhh!!!

- It all just kinda happened.

I wanted an after-school job.

But then, an indestructible superhero

hired me to be his sidekick.

- Ah!

- Now we blow bubbles...

and fight crime. Feels good.

[ theme music ]

- Call it. - Up the tube!

- Aw, my boot! - Ha!

- Whoa whoa whoa, wait a second...

you watched the cartoon?

- Yeah we watched it. - Yeah we watched it!

- How?!?

- You know what? You don't need to know how!

- You sent us a copy by mistake!

- Now you know how!

Anyway, the point is-- the cartoon is terrible.

- Well, we all happen to think the cartoon is excellent.

- Yeah, my kid watched it and told me it was great.

- Okay, well, no offense dude,

but somethin's wrong with your kid.

- Yeah, you got a bum kid, man.

- All right...

since you two are apparently "cartoon experts,"

why don't you tell us what was wrong with it?

- Okay! - Okay!

- We will then! - Maybe we will then.

- Here it comes! - Sure! Y'know what?!?

I got this. I got this.

First... I don't suck my thumb.

And I've never gone,

"Oh, Captain Man, Captain Man, help me!"

- Yeah, I don't have a propeller coming out of my head...

- Or his butt... - Or my butt!

- And they forgot the church oranges!

- Yeah just flew away

and left 'em right there on the ground!

- Oh...okay...

well, if you guys know so much about making cartoons,

why don't you write your own dang script?!?

- Oh! Oh!

Is that, is that a challenge?

You'd like that, wouldn't ya?!?

- Sounds good. - Maybe we will.

- Easy! Y'know what...

you better call the FIRE department, 'cuzzz...

- Cuz' we're gonna burn your houses down!

- No no no. Too far.

- That was way too far. - I'm terribly sorry, what?

- You guys are fired!

- Yeah yeah, you're fired.

So, why don'tcha zoom zoom zoom to the moon moon moon!

- Which makes no sense!

Nice. - Good stuff.

- Nailed it.

- Okay, so... now what?

- Now...

Henry and I write a new script.

- Yeah, we write it.

- You guys do know that the cartoon premieres

in two days?

- And that neither of you

has ever written a script before.

- Pffft, so? - So what?

- No biggie. Anybody can write a script for TV.

- Yeah, monkeys could do it.

- We can have a great, hilarious script

by tomorrow morning.

- Absolutely.

- Wait--you mean stay up all night?!?

- Heck yeah, man. - Dang straight.

- Jasper, go get us nine gallons of black coffee.

- On it!

- Char, go get us some sugar, and a stun stick.

- 'Kay kay.

- And what about me?!? What do I do?!?

- You...

you go put on some writing music.

- Ooo!

[ upbeat music plays ]

[ music stops ]

[ music continues ]

- Ohhh!!! Why didn't I think of that?!?

- The chairs, I want them to be comfortable.

And, even the people who are standing.

And in chairs, I want them to have a really good view...

- Piper...

- Cuz' I don't want anyone to have to miss out

if someone's too tall. - Piper...

- Piper...

- Um and for the audio, I want big speakers

mounted up right there... - Piper.

- Excuse me, but it's : in the morning

and--what is all this?

- I told you: I have to get this place ready

for people to come here and watch the premiere

of the new Captain Man and Kid Danger cartoon!

- I'm so psyched about it.

- But I... I don't understand why--

[ doorbell rings ]

- Can... Can you please get the door?

- Hi.

- Can I use your bathroom?

- Uh... I don't even know you.

- Right. Can I use your bathroom?

- Oh my god!

Shaun White!

- She knows who I am.

- Do you work with Nate?

- No, I work with snow.

- Daaaad!

This is Shaun White, the greatest snowboarder ever!

- Ahhh, I'm... I'm okay.

- Well, why is he here?

- Because!

Shaun White is like...

- Why are you here?

- For the premiere

of the Captain Man and Kid Danger cartoon.

- Oh--but that's not 'til tomorrow night.

- I know, but I wanna sit front row center,

so I'm gonna camp out, right here on this porch,

so I can be first in line.

- Ohhhhh, okay.

- So, bathroom?

- Uh, look--

- Uh, you can use our V.I.P. bathroom--

in my parents' room, upstairs.

- Cool snow.

- Wait um... my wife is sleeping up there!

- No worries!

- Honey!

- And as Captain Man and Kid Danger

watch the Evil Piece of Popcorn

fly away on the bird...

- We fade out, and...

- End of episode!

- Not too shabby, right?

- Well?!?

- That script is fantastic!

- It's soooo hilarious!

- See?!? Anybody can write for TV.

- Literally anybody could do it.

- Like a monkey could do it.

- Yeah, you just push buttons.

Kid Danger and Captain Man is what this is all about.

- Aaaand...

I should note that we finished it hours

before the premiere.

- Boom! - Haha!

- Well, hold on a second boys.

It's nice that you guys wrote a great script,

but now, how are we gonna get it made into a cartoon?

By tomorrow night?

- Well. Schwoz is a genius, right?

And he can do anything.

- Yeah, so?

- So you're gonna take our script

and uh y'know, make it into a cartoon.

- Yeah, Schwoz! You can do it!

- Yah, I don't know...

- C'mon!

You went to Cartoon Community College?

- Only for two years.

- So you'll do it?

- I was up all night, dancing,

and we only have hours. A lot of work. I can't--

- He says he'll do it!

- All right! - Fantastic Schwoz!

- Hey hey hey hey hey hey! I'll go make the coffee!

- No but but-- - I'll get sugar and pizza!

- Wait a second! - I'll go get the stun stick!

- Ooo, and I'll go get another antique music circle!

- Wait a second--

- Yah, hello, this is Schwoz. Uh-huh.

Yah, I'm going to have to cancel my colonoscopy again.

Yah, again.

- Okay guys I'm fi--

- Ahhh! - Ahh!!!

- I finished.

- Huh? - Wait, what?

- The script you guys wrote.

I finished making it into a cartoon.

- For real? That's awesome!

- Hey! Alright Schwoz!!!

- Yeah! - Good job!

- Oh okay! Alright! Stay with us.

- You good? You good?

- Hey hey hey! It's already :.

- Oh man!

They're supposed to show the cartoon at eight!

- Jasper, Charlotte--

you two clean yourselves up, go to my house,

and stall everybody 'til we get there!

- Clean myself up?!?

- You know what I mean! Go go go.

- Schwoz--you put the cartoon on a thumb drive.

- Yah, okay.

- Hey, start the car. I'll wait here and get the thumb drive.

- Good thinkin'.

- Up the tube!

- Okay Schwoz, we forgot to come up with a title

so what are you thinking we should...

Schwoz?

Awww. He's sleeping.

SCHWOZ!!! - AHHHHH!!!

- I have an idea for a title.

- And you're live in three, two--

- We're here live at the premiere party

for the brand new Captain Man and Kid Danger cartoon,

and boy are the celebrities out tonight.

- That's White--and by that I mean SHAUN White,

champion water-boarder.

- I...I think you mean snow-boarder. Not water.

Shaun White snow-boards!

- Well why don't we ask Shaun White himself,

because here he comes...

- Hello Shaun.

- What?

- How many gold medals have you won, water-boarding?

- Mary... - What's happening?

- Hey hey, what's up people?

- I don't know.

- This is Shaun White. - I am?

- No way, my name's also Shaun White!

- Yeah, I'm just here to see the cartoon.

- Wanna race to that big tall bush across the street?!?

- No.

- Ready?!? - No.

- ONE...TWO... - No. Ohhhh, peer pressure!

- THREE!!! - OHHHHHHH!!!

- Usually, I'm sitting at a desk.

But tonight, I'm standing.

- Where is the cartoon?!?

I have over people in my house,

waiting to watch a cartoon, and I got no cartoon!

- Just listen to us! - Alright, don't worry.

- Please!

Whaddaya mean you got fired!

You guys produce the cartoon!

How do you get fired when you produce the cart--

What are you--

Whyyyyy?!?!

- Captain Man and Kid Danger

are going to bring the cartoon.

- Yeah! They should be here any second!

- How do you guys know this?

- Oh. Well we... we we uh...

- Prayed.

- Yeah... Jasper and I...

prayed that Captain Man and Kid Danger

would bring the cartoon here...tonight.

- You guys prayed?!?

- Oh yeah. Yes. - Totally prayed.

- Hey!

Thank you. Yes!

Aw, you guys don't have to stand.

- We are very proud of who we are.

- You guys are much! - Hashtag: blessed!

- Grateful! Humble. - I love my life.

- Hey! Did you bring the cartoon?!?

- Boom.

- Okay everyone! Take your seats!

The new cartoon will start in one minute!

So, wait... where's Henry?

- Yeah! We can't start the cartoon without Henry!

- Who's Henry? - Where is he?

- Uh...sorry we are not waiting for Henry.

- No. I'm worried.

I haven't seen him for days.

- Hey! It's already :. Okay?

I got no time for more complications!

Take your seats!!!

- How about here and here?

It's gonna be great! - Okay, okay.

- Hey guy-- you jacked my seat!

- No, this is my seat!

- Dude dude dude... - What what?

- Dude dude dude. - Stop that. What?

- That's Shaun White.

- Well, I don't care if he's Betty White!

I'm sittin' in this seat, right here!

- Then I'm sittin' in your lap!

- Yeah, well you won't be the first Olympian

who sat in it!

- Told ya' I'd sit here.

- Good. I'm glad you did. - Good. I'm glad you did!

- Good. I'm glad you did. - Good. I'm glad you did.

- Okay everyone!

- Okay Charlotte!

- Here we go!

- Dude!

- We forgot to give the cartoon a title!

- Uh yeah, don't worry about it,

I took care of it.

- You did? - Mhm!

- Well, what title did you pick?

- Hm???

- The Adventures offfff... Kid Danger!

- Shhhh. The show's starting...

Look over there.

♪ Here we go up the tube

♪ Fighting crime is what we do

♪ A superhero and his sidekick with a plan ♪

♪ Who's the one behind the mask ♪

♪ Who can move super fast

♪ It's Kid Danger

- And look. - It's Captain Man.

♪ So come along

♪ It's the Adventures of Kid Danger ♪

♪ 'Cause this is all

♪ For the Adventures of Kid Danger ♪

- I'm okay!

- Feels good.