02x19 - Wilson Sleeps Over

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Dennis the Menace". Aired: October 4, 1959 – July 7, 1963.*
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Follows the Mitchell family – Henry, Alice, and their only child, Dennis, an energetic, trouble-prone, mischievous, but well-meaning boy, who often tangles first with his peace-and-quiet-loving neighbor, George Wilson, a retired salesman, and later with George's brother John, a writer.
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02x19 - Wilson Sleeps Over

Post by bunniefuu »

-Dad, isn't it swell about Mr.
and Mrs.

Wilson

staying over here
tomorrow night?

-Yes, son.

-Is that why you're
putting the sticky stuff

all over the floor?

-Uh, Dennis, keep your
fingers out of it!

No, as a matter of
fact, the guest room

needed a varnishing,
and your mother

and I thought this would be just
as good a time-- Dennis!

-Jeepers!
Here, Sam!

-Dennis, stay where you are.

How many times have I
told you about keeping

this frog in the house?

-I'm not keeping him
in the house, dad!

He's just visiting!

-Well, visiting hours are over.

I'm telling you
for the last time,

I want you to find another
home for that frog.

Do you understood?

-OK.

Come on, Sam.

We gotta find you a
new place to live.

[theme music]

-Oh, Martha, Listen
to this warranty

on the back of
these instructions.

Says, guaranteed to exterminate
all insects that walk,

crawl, wiggle, or fly.

-I only hope it works, dear.

-Oh, it will, Martha.

It's bound to.

Oh, all we have to do is uncork
that bottle that's

in the basement, let the
fumes come up through

the air vents.

-I'd feel better if you'd
called in a

professional fumigator.

You've already tried to get rid
of those termites

once by yourself
without success.

[door bell]

-Well, that was before they had
this new, improved product

on the market, my dear.

-Hi, Mr. Wilson!

-Oh, it's you, Dennis.

-Mr. Wilson, I'd like you to meet
Sam, a new friend of mine.

-Bring him in.
-He is in!

-Oh, good grief!

-Hello, dear.

-Hi, Mrs. Wilson!

Mr. Wilson, would you mind giving
Sam a home in the fish

pond in your backyard?

-Yes, I would mind!

Very much!

-But I've gotta find
him a nice home.

-George, what harm would it do?

-Martha!

I have no intention of letting a
loud bullfrog croak love

songs underneath my bedroom
window all night long.

-He won't, Mr. Wilson.

He doesn't even know any!

-(MUTTERING) Doesn't know any.

Dennis, the answer is no.

Now please take your slimy
friend away from here.

-OK.

Come along, Sam.

See you tomorrow night at our
place, Mr.

Wilson.

-George Wilson!

How much noise can
one small frog make?

-Well that's an interesting
question, Martha.

And I have no intention
of finding out

the answer at
o'clock in the morning.

Oh, if only we didn't
have to stay out

of the house for
hours while we fumigate.

-We're only going next
door to the Mitchells'.

-Yes, that's what I mean.

-Now, George, you hinted around
until they practically

had to ask us to stay.

-Now I wonder if that was wise--
hours with Dennis.

DENNIS (OFFSCREEN): Mr. Wilson!

Mr. Wilson!

Mr. Wilson!

Mr. Wilson!

-What's the matter now, Dennis?

-Sam jumped down
into your basement!

-Well, what do you expect me to
do, organize a safari?

Run down there and
get him out yourself.

-OK, Mr. Wilson!

Sam?

Where are ya, Sam?

You down there, Sam?

Jeez!

[croaking]

-Gotcha!

Uh-oh.

Now look what you
made me do, Sam!

Boy, is Mr. Wilson
going to be mad!

I found Sam, Mr. Wilson.

-Oh, that's fine, Dennis.

-Is that stuff in
the basement what

you're gonna use to k*ll
your bugs, Mr. Wilson?

-Yes, Dennis.

Now don't bother me.

-Gee, that bottle is sure made
out of breakable glass,

isn't it, Mr. Wilson?

-George, what's
that strange odor?

-Hm?

Why, it smells like-- Dennis!

Tell me you didn't!

-Have you ever
thought about staying

at our place
tonight, Mr. Wilson?

-Great Scott, he did!

Run for your lives!

Oh, Dennis, come on!

Get out of here!

Ugh!

-Doesn't look as if the
varnish on that floor

will be dry until
tomorrow morning.

-Oh, dear, I was afraid of that.

-Well, you can't mean the
floor of the guest room?

-Well, I could put some
paper down, I suppose.

-And spoil your new floor?

Couldn't we do something else?

-Let's see, um,
Alice, Mrs. Wilson

could sleep in my bed upstairs.

I can sleep on the
couch down here.

And-and Mr. Wilson
can sleep on the fold

out cot in Dennis's room.

-Oh, well I suppose
for one night

it wouldn't hurt--
Dennis's room?

-It's a very comfortable
cot, Mr. Wilson.

-Uh, let me try the sofa.

Excuse me, Martha.

Try it here.

And see.

-How does it feel?

-Well, I don't know.

It feels as if I bulge where the
sofa doesn't, or something.

-Dear, perhaps Mr.
Wilson would rather use

Dennis's bed.

-Alice, George wouldn't
think of doing it.

Would you, dear?

-Oh, no, no, of course
I wouldn't, Martha.

Unless they insisted.

-We should have
thought of it sooner.

Dennis won't mind sleeping
on the cot one bit.

-You see there, Martha?

They insisted.

Oh, excuse me.

-Perha[s you'd like to take
alittle nap before dinner, Mr.

Wilson?

-Why yes, Alice, thank you.

I believe I would.

-George?

-Hm?

-I hope you don't
walk in your sleep

tonight and scare these
people half to death.

-Now Martha, you know very well I
haven't walked in my sleep

for nearly a year.

-But you're more
apt to do it when

you're overtired,
the way you are now.

-Hey, dad!

Guess where Sam's moved to?

-Dennis, I'm in no mood
for guessing games.

-I moved him over to
Tommy's fish pond.

-Well, I'm happy
for both your sake.

-Hey, where's good
ol' Mr. Wilson?

-Dennis, I think you've
bothered Mr.

Wilson enough for one day.

He's just gone upstairs.

-Jeepers, dad.

I'm not gonna bother him.

I just wanna ask him if he wants
to go rollerskating!

-Uh, Dennis?

Uh, Mr. Wilson's
gone up to lie down.

-Already?

He hasn't even done
anything with me yet!

-He's just taking a little
nap before dinner.

-Oh.

-Oh, incidentally,
Mr. Wilson is going

to share your bedroom
with you tonight.

-Oh, boy!

Good ol' Mr. Wilson!

-And one other thing-- I-I don't
think it's anything

to be concerned about--
but I understand

Mr. Wilson walks in
his sleep sometimes.

-Walks in his sleep?

-Well, where are you off to now?

-I gotta tell the
kids about this!

-Oh, George, just
look at this room.

-Ha ha!

Baseball pennants, ,
comic books,

nasty-looking spider.

Bubble gum.

Wonder what's in this thing?
[boing]

-Oh, my!

-Oh, George.

Doesn't this room make
you a little sorry

that we don't have a
little boy of our own?

-Makes me a little
sorry we don't

have a little hotel
room of our own.

-George, it's only
for overnight.

-Oh, well, all right.

Oh, Martha, I had everything
so beautifully planned

for tomorrow.

Now look at me-- gassed
out of my own house

without even my toothbrush.

All because of Dennis.

-Oh, dear, it isn't as if Dennis
did it on purpose.

-Well Martha, hurricanes don't
wreck towns on purpose.

Great Scott!

-What is it, dear?

-Well I don't know,
it-- what in the world?

A stuffed alligator.

Good grief.

Ugh.

Oh.

-Well, I gotta get back inside.

Mr. Wilson's taking a nap.

For all I know, he's
walking around up

there right now.

-Wow!
-Dennis!

Can I come with ya?

-Jeepers, Tommy,
there's no telling

how mom and dad will feel about
outsiders watching.

-I'll give ya a nickel.

-A nickel?

-I'll give you a nickel,
too-- uh, tomorrow.

-Here's my nickel, Dennis!

-OK, come on.

He's right in there.

Now, all of you sit down.

Shh.

-Boy, this is better than waitin'
for a horror movie

to start!

-You asleep?

-Oh!

Oh, oh, it's you, Dennis.

-You feelin' sleepy, Mr. Wilson?

-Well, I was, until you came in.

-Would you like me to ask my mom
to give you a sleeping pill?

-Oh, Dennis, go home.

-I am home!

-Oh, so you are.

Good grief.

-He's not asleep yet.

But one eyelid's kinda droopy.

-Gee, Dennis!

I gotta get home
for supper soon!

-Me, too!

-And I gotta get back
and change my babies.

I want my nickel back!

-Me, too!

-Jeepers, Tommy, which
would you rather do?

Eat or watch something
that will scare you

for the next years?

-I wanna do both.

[gasps]

-Oh, now what is it, Dennis?

-Mr. Wilson, would you mind
walking around a little

with your eyes closed?

-Would I what?

-I've got three friends
out there who have never

seen anybody walk
in their sleep.

-Oh, for Pete's sake!

-Well, what are you
children doing here?

-Good afternoon, Mrs. Wilson.

We're waiting for Mr. Wilson to
walk in his sleep.

-Hi, Mrs. Wilson!

-Dennis, I'm sure your
mother would rather you children

played outside.

Besides, Mr.
Wilson never walks in his

sleep during the day.

-He doesn't?

-No.
-Oh.

OK, come on, kids.

Hey, Mrs. Wilson?

Will you do us
little kids on favor?

-Of course, dear.
What is it?

-If Mr. Wilson does start
walking in his sleep,

aim him down the stairs.

-What are we gonna do now?

-I got an idea!

Instead of giving your
nickels back, I'll stay

up all night.

-What good will that do us?

-Yeah!

-When Mr. Wilson
walks in his sleep,

I'll take a picture
with my flash camera

and give ya each a copy!

-Gee, Dennis,
that's a swell idea!

-Yeah!

-I want my nickel back!

I don't believe he walks in
his sleep at all,

Dennis Mitchell!

-Here's your nickel
back, Margaret.

Mr. Wilson probably
wouldn't walk

in front of a dumb girl, anyhow!

-Is that so?

Come along, children.

-See you tomorrow, Dennis!

-I'd better go
home, too, Dennis.

-Hey Tommy, say
hello to Sam for me.

And tell him not to go
swimming in your fish

pond after eating.

-OK.

I really hope he doesn't start
making a lot of noise

in the middle of the night.

My dad's bad enough
when I wake him up!

-Good night, dear.

-Oh, good night, Martha.

-I hope those pajamas
fit, Mr. Wilson.

-Oh, oh, they're-they're
fine, Mitchell.

-Good night, son.

-Good night, dad.
-Good night.

-Jeepers!

Isn't this fun, Mr. Wilson?

-Oh, this is just
peachy dandy, Dennis.

Go to sleep.

-First, we gotta
say our prayers.

Aren't you gonna say your
prayers, Mr.

Wilson?

-Well, you see,
Dennis, the sad fact

is, most grown people neglect to
say their prayers at night.

-My mom says all nice people say
their prayers every night.

-Well, your mom is
absolutely right.

Eh, well, you go first, Dennis.

-Dear Lord, please bless mom
and dad, and Mr. and Mrs.

Wilson,

and Tommy, and Sam.

And please make Mr. Wilson
walk in his sleep.

Amen.

-Dennis, I am not going
to walk in my sleep.

Oh.

Dear Lord, please watch
over Martha, and the Mitchells,

including Dennis.

Amen.

-What about Sam?

-I will pray for
your frog, Dennis,

when he starts putting
in a good word for me.

Heaven's sake.

-Good night, Mr. Wilson.

-Oh, good night.

-You want a drink of
water, Mr. Wilson?

-No, thank you.

-You hungry?

-Oh, Dennis, we just ate.

-Yeah, but that was downstairs!

-Dennis, go to sleep.

-Your bed comfortable?

-My bed is very comfortable.

How's yours?

-The one you're in is mine!

-I don't know the
one I'm in is yours.

I meant-- the-- oh, good night.

Well, what's wrong, now?

-I'm not sleepy!

-I am!

Dennis, would you please
mind not staring at me?

-Then how will I know when
youstart walking in your sleep?

-I am not going to
walk in my sleep.

Oh, good grief!

Oh!
Oh!

-Gee, Mr. Wilson!

You're the funniest friend I
ever slept with!

[whistling]

TOMMY (OFFSCREEN):

Open the front door!

-OK!

Jeepers, Tommy!

What are you doing
out this late?

-Your old frog was
croakin' so loud

thought he'd wake my dadup and
get me in trouble!

Here.

-Hi, Sam.

I guess he got home sick.

-I almost got in
trouble, anyway.

I ran into a policeman
on the way over here.

But I told him--

[croaking]

-There he goes!

-Uh-oh!

-Gee, that was a good one!

-He's going up the stairs!

Boy!

He's quick!

You look under that bed!

-Dennis!
Look!

[gasps]

-He's headed for the guest room!

We gotta get my camera.
-Yeah.

-Come on!

-Dennis, is that you?
-Jeepers!

It's mom!

-Henry!

Henry, wake up!
-Huh?

Huh?

What is it, Alice?

-Mr. Wilson isn't in his bed, and
the front door was open!

-Oh, he's probably
walking in his sleep.

-Get your coat, dear.

Oh, honey, that's my hat.

-Oh, yeah.

OK.

I'll start looking
around the neighborhood.

Meanwhile, you better
call the police.

-The police?

-Yeah, he may get
hit by a milk truck.

[door bell]

-Good evening.

-That certainly was
fast, wasn't it?

What can I do for you, officer?

-I stopped a little boy on the
street a few minutes ago.

He gave me this address.

-Is this possible?

-He ran away before I had a
chance to bring him home.

-But Dennis has been upstairs
in his bed all evening.

-Are you sure?

-Of course we're sure!

-Would you mind
if we took a look?

-Not at all!

[pop]

-I wonder what that was?

[snoring]

-I'll clean up the mess.

You get some more
flash bulbs, Tommy.

-OK!

-Alice, is anything the matter?

-Oh, Henry's going
out to look for Mr.

Wilson in just a few minutes.

-Look for him?

-Uh, right this way, officer.

-Well, he's in bed all right!

-But that's not Dennis!

-Sure it is, lady!

-I think that I know my own son!

-Tommy, what are you doing here?

-Hi, Mr. Mitchell.

I just dropped by
to bring Sam back.

-Where's my husband?

-Oh please, lady one
thing at a time, huh?

-Tommy, do you know
where Dennis is?

-Sure.

In the guest room.

-The guest room?

-Alice, what is going on?

-Oh, Mrs. Wilson, I wish I knew!

-Dennis, what are
you doing in here?

-I'm picking up glass so Mr.
Wilson won't walk on it.

-Now, I've seen everything.

-Shh! he must be
awakened gently.

-Uh, Dennis, come here, honey.

We'd better stay out here.

-George?

George, dear, wake up.

George?

I can't wake him up.

[croaking]

-Oh.

-Good ol' Sam can
wake anybody up!

-Oh, good morning, Martha.

Oh, what a dreadful night.

I dreamt I was sleeping
in the same with Dennis!

What am I doing here?

-Dear, you walked in your sleep.

-Good grief!

Now I remember!

It wasn't a dream!

I--

-Smile, Mr. Wilson!

Say cheese!

-Great Scott!

Ah, there, that awful
odor is finally gone.

Oh, isn't it wonderful to
be back in our own home

again, Martha?
-Yes, dear.

And I'm so glad
you're letting Dennis

keep the frog is our
fish pond after all.

-Well, I'm so glad to
be back that I just

couldn't be mad at anybody.

Besides, it was the
only way I could

be sure of getting those
negatives from Dennis.

DENNIS (OFFSCREEN): Mr. Wilson!
-Oh.

-Hi, Mr. Wilson!

Hi, Mrs. Wilson!

-Hello, dear.

-Oh, Dennis, what are
you doing over here?

-I just came over
to thank you again

for letting Sam live over
here in your fish pond?

-Well, that's all right, Dennis.

Who knows?

Maybe his croaking
will wake me up

when I start walking
in my sleep again.

-They sure will, Mr. Wilson!

-They?

What do you mean by 'they?'

-The boy that gave him to me said
Sam's gonna be a mother!

By summertime, you'll have
a whole gillion croaking frogs!

-Great Scott!

[theme music]
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