01x02 - Opening Arguments

Episode transcripts for the TV series, "Jury Duty". Aired: April 7 – April 21, 2023.*
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01x02 - Opening Arguments

Post by bunniefuu »

I'm stoked to the max.

I'm so happy to be here.

I'm gonna be upset if I don't

get on the jury, for sure.

I will be damned if my 38-year

career ends in a mockery.

Are there any other

reasons that you feel that

you would not be able

to be a good juror?

I'm r*cist.

You are now the jury in the

matter of Hilgrove versus Morris.

How y'all let them get

through the security?

Own backyard.

Do you think that him sitting

would be a distraction?

Not for me, no.

Okay.

I had never heard of "sequester" before.

That was a new word I learned yesterday.

I had to look it up.

But I don't know what

that's going to entail.

Full name Ronald Gladden.

All right, you're good to go.

Sit down there. Have a seat.

What's going on with you, man?

Just preparing for whatever

that's just gonna come, man.

It's gonna be a long day, bro.

sh*t.

Um, well, I was

supposed to go on a trip,

and I'm really hoping that

maybe I could still leave, uh,

by Friday would be nice,

to just get out of here

so I don't miss Cancun.

Um, yeah, I just miss my girlfriend.

Hey, I don't wanna interrupt,

uh, but I just felt a

little compelled to

say sorry for what happened yesterday.

I did not anticipate paparazzi.

I'm sorry that we're having

to do this sequestrian thing.

Sorry as in I empathize with you,

not sorry 'cause it's my fault.

'Cause it wasn't my fault.

How could it have been?

What, did I call the paparazzi

myself, tell them to come down here?

That's nuts.

- Anyway, long story short

- What the hell is he even talking about?

I don't really know.

I couldn't even do that if I tried.

Uh, but I know that one of

you did, and that's not cool.

Um, if you needed the money, just ask.

Do you have any money that I could have?

No.

Um, but it doesn't hurt to ask.

Good morning.

Morning.

- Do we stand?

- Stay seated, folks.

I wanted to reintroduce

Nikki, my bailiff, and

- Hi, Nikki.

- I'm Judge Rosen.

Uh, first of all, I wanna

thank you for your patience.

A bit of business to go through.

By the end of the day,

I will choose one of you

to be the foreperson of the jury.

At home, my wife, Sonia, she calls

me the foreperson of the home.

It's because I'm making decisions.

I don't even have to think.

It's just intuitive.

I would really rather not be foreperson.

Definitely, I'm good with talking

to people one-on-one, but yeah,

if I have to talk in front of

a crowd, get a little jittery.

In my opinion, this is a

very important position.

The foreperson is essentially

the captain of the

Oh, Your Honor.

Uh, if it's okay with you,

I'd be more than happy

to take that position.

I've always wanted to

Alternates are not eligible.

Sorry.

Again, I ask for your patience.

Yeah, I'd say being an

alternate, I feel marginalized,

being an alternate.

I don't, um I mean, as a

celebrity, this is the first time

I've ever felt, uh,

like I've been treated

differently in a negative way.

Um, it doesn't really sit

right with me, to be honest.

I feel marginalization.

Lonnie, what about you?

I mean, as an alternate

juror, is this the first time

you ever felt like

treated less than or ?

Nope.

Nope.

Yes.

Uh, I am owner and manager

of two gumball machines

and a sticker machine.

I have some bad luck recently,

which makes it hard to take

some time away from work.

Yeah. It's so sour.

I don't mind not being

young. Seventies are fun.

You guys have a lot to look forward to.

There you go.

They used to call it the golden

years and I thought that was stupid.

But guess what? Things

don't change all that much.

I still like a good lay.

There you go. Right.

- Some things never change.

- I'm not gonna

- If it makes you feel any better

- Yeah?

I finally realize you play

one of my top-five

favorite roles of all time.

Which one?

Dude, you probably can't guess.

The judge is in it the whole time.

- I haven't done many courtroom dramas.

- Dude, it's so

Oh, it's not

- I haven't done

- It's not a real judge.

Sex Drive.

Dude, like, God.

Did you buy that one or

did you watch it on Hulu?

No, I bought it.

There we go.

I'm gonna read some

sequestration instructions.

Although you have been sequestered,

it's of the utmost importance

that you still not allow anything

that happens outside this courtroom

to affect your decision.

Do not investigate the case

or conduct any experiments.

Further, do not use any

electronic device or media.

Okay?

Great. Nikki.

Take your phones out and

write down any phone number

that you will need to contact,

because your phones are gonna

be taken away at this time.

Wait, no. What?

sh*t. My stocks. What if

I need to sell a stock?

You will be able to make phone calls.

That's why you're writing down

important numbers you need to.

But they will be supervised.

It's less about me having to call them

and more about them having to reach me.

This is I'm losing a job

because of this, potentially.

If there's a number

that pops up in your head

after you submitted stuff,

just let the bailiff know.

This is a different

cat we're dealing with.

- This guy's, like, an auteur.

- Sir, sir, I asked for your cooperation.

He's trying so hard to

look, like, so important.

And I just I didn't

even know who he was.

I saw The Notebook.

I don't remember him.

Please put your phone

and hand over any tablets.

I have an iPad.

- That comes with us too.

- Uh-uh, what is that?

- Oh, I don't

- Is that an ear?

Oh, it's a, um

It's a wearable electronic device.

Right.

The wire connects it to this

handy and fashionable keyboard.

- No, that's coming in here too.

- Yeah, I know.

Todd had a prosthetic ear

that worked as his Bluetooth

that vibrated when his phone went off.

- I don't wanna touch that.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So do you have something to put that in?

No, it's just loose, but I could

I can, like, wrap it up.

He had to give it up

with his cell phone.

And so when the other

deputies opened up his bag

and they saw it, it freaked them out.

They thought it was a real ear, I guess.

Nobody having their phone

is definitely an opportunity

for us to bond and

get to know each other

within a matter of minutes of

everyone giving up their phones,

because nobody had anything to

do and we started socializing.

So it is kind of a nice break

to be away from the phone.

And it is nice being

able to talk to somebody

and they're not doing this,

just staring down at their phone

while you're trying to talk to 'em.

Marsden, we can't do that

while we're giving instructions.

- I'm trying to

- I know you

I didn't hear you were

giving instructions.

Did you turn this in?

The numbers out of my phone?

I'm sorry.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

I have the honor of representing

Ms. Jacqui Hilgrove in this matter.

She's beautiful and she's poised.

And as she sits here today, she

doesn't look particularly injured,

but she is.

She's very well put together.

She's composed, the way

she sits up straight.

Like, she carries a

confidence to her demeanor.

But then looking at her face,

she does always have this grim,

melancholy, just, like,

downward appearance to her face

like she's just constantly frowning.

Prior to this event, she enjoyed life.

She enjoyed what she was creating.

But since then, she's

been clinically depressed,

heavily medicated, and

barely able to get out of bed.

The direct result of

the defendant's conduct.

Ladies and gentlemen,

allow me to play this video.

This is what we will prove

to you during the trial.

The defendant left his home after

an altercation with his mother.

He showed up disruptive to work.

Clearly intoxicated.

It was evident to everyone

that the defendant both

used dr*gs at work and

encouraged others to do so.

As a result of his wildly out of

control drug and alcohol abuse,

the defendant mishandled

an important order

which overwhelmed the machines,

resulting in catastrophic damage.

And then after operating the

machine in a negligent manner,

he passed out under a pile of

T-shirts soaked in his own urine.

My client was left

with an irate customer,

3,000 unusable units of product,

and a downturn in business

from which it never recovered.

First appearance of the defendant,

um, I try not to judge a

book too much by its cover,

but I mean, he had the really long hair,

kind of the unkept shaven face.

You know, he's not, like,

presenting himself well.

Probably wasn't ironing his shirts.

I kind of did see him as somebody

who, you know, goes to work,

they do the bare minimum,

they collect their paycheck,

and then they go home.

Mr. Sanders.

Just need to get logged on here.

And I want to assure this court, um,

that we also have a video

presentation that is pretty phenomenal.

And I just need a moment, um

to pull that up.

And it is coming from

the cloud as we speak.

So if you will just give me a second.

Uh

- Can't get the

Wi-Fi. - Onto this?

In this building.

He is a dusty-ass attorney. I'd

be mad if that was my lawyer.

- I'd be pissed.

- I agree.

I'm joining the Wi-Fi

as we speak. Um

This is your opening.

I'm-I'm so sorry about this, Your Honor.

It's been a day. It's been a day.

We're going to break for the day.

You guys go back to your hotel.

And we'll get a fresh

start with Mr. Sanders.

You're gonna have a dynamite

presentation tomorrow?

- Dynamite, Your Honor, first thing in the morning.

- Great.

And I will pick that foreperson

when we reconvene tomorrow.

Thank you, folks, for

your understanding.

We're adjourned for the day.

- All rise.

- Thank you.

Damn it!

What do we got going on?

I dropped my pen.

It's a big pen.

Sorry about that.

We work very hard to try

to get all of you together,

but because this sequester

was a surprise to me,

we have to split you

all up into two hotels.

I like our hotel group.

The only thing I don't like about it is,

I would like an opportunity

to mingle with everybody.

What did we get done today? We heard

opening statement from one half.

They said he peed in a pile of T-shirts.

How do you get that drunk

where you piss yourself?

I don't

- But what are they saying?

- You're wasted, man.

Are they saying he just

pissed on a bunch of T-shirts?

That seems egregious.

It does seem a little bit egregious.

This place doesn't look

bad. This could be fun.

- Sorry, I don't

- Oh, yeah.

I can throw this in a

I think you got another

one too, don't you?

- Hey.

- Hey.

- What's your name?

- Officer Yates.

Officer Yates. What's up?

- Nice meeting you.

- Nice meeting you.

I'm gonna sit in the back, actually.

I get a little car sick in the front.

Thank you.

It'll just be a minute.

- Wait, where's he going?

- Gotta say bye real quick

- I don't know.

- to the kiddos.

Guys, this is

I'm bummed, man. I gotta leave you.

Uh, yeah, my lawyer set up this

whole private bailiff thing,

which is coming out of

my own pocket, not cheap,

but it allows me to stay at home.

But he's got to stay with

me, so that's kind of,

no offense, kind of a bummer.

Um, but you guys are

gonna have the best time.

My God, I'm so jealous.

Yeah, but you could stay. You

could just come into the hotel.

I'm cold, so

You guys don't have too much

fun without me, all right?

All right, I wanna hear

about all the good stuff.

- Thank you.

- You guys are gonna bond.

It's gonna be great. I'm so jealous!

You are sequestered. No outside

company, anything like that.

I can have my phone

back to do a video call?

No, it's locked up.

- So I have to use a regular phone call?

- You do not get your phone.

You won't get any phone, electronics

back until this trial has ended.

Okay. My girlfriend and I,

every night, we FaceTime.

You can talk to me tonight.

No, I understand, but what's going

on is that you're sequestered.

Right.

So follow me.

Yeah, let's take a tour of the

digs. Let's see what we got.

Okay.

- This is the common area?

- Yes.

And this is your area.

Oh, dude, if they got Mario Kart

- No way. Oh!

- Right there, bro.

You guys are

So 637.

Ronald, make sure that works.

There we go.

Sequester. Sequester. Two beds.

Wow. It's so nice. Oh, my God.

Oh, I just heard myself. Thank you.

- Hey, how's it going?

- How's it going, man?

I just didn't know if you saw

that we have the, um the door.

- Oh, is this shared?

- Yeah, yeah.

- Oh, nice.

- So yeah.

No, I didn't even see that.

- Oh, what's up, bud?

- Yeah, hey, what's up?

Nice.

So, you're good to go.

We'll have another officer

up here to check on you,

give you some nighttime

rules and everything.

He right behind you.

- I know, right there.

- Sorry.

- Connecting.

- Todd, you can come over here too.

- Uh, which way?

- So that I won't have to say this twice.

- Sure.

- I'm just letting y'all know,

I'm going to check in

the other two downstairs.

There'll be another officer

over here to make sure

that y'all are good for

food, things like that.

So

Sorry, I didn't know where

- Stop doing that sh*t.

- Sorry, yeah.

- I'm sorry.

- Don't. I don't like people behind me.

Yeah, sorry, sorry, sorry.

The two rooms that we have are next

to each other. They're adjoining.

So I slipped a note to

Ronald just to let him know

some rudimentary signs that

we might use to communicate.

One knock equals "I'm awake." Two

knocks equal "I'm going to bed."

Three knocks equal "I have

leftover food if you'd like any."

Yeah, that's exactly what he did.

And I could see his thought process

too, 'cause when we first got here,

we didn't know what we

could and couldn't do.

Ronald wrote back, "Works for me.

Just let me know if you need anything."

- Does this belt need to come off?

- No, you're fine.

- State your full name, please.

- Pat McCurdy.

- What is your bailiff arrangement like?

- Oh, man.

How does that work?

Dude, it's great and not great.

Like, he's in my house.

Wait, you're not staying at the hotel?

My lawyer said I could hire a private

bailiff to escort me from court,

- home, stay with me at home.

- Okay.

I tried to get him to stay in my casita.

He said, insisted, that he

has to stay inside the house.

What is a casita?

It's like a guest house.

You should've seen his

face when I was putting

my makeup on this morning.

You put you put you put makeup on?

It's not a weird thing in

my business to have a guy

It looks lighter today.

You did a good job.

He now has his own private bailiff,

which he has the money to pay for,

escorting him to and from his own house.

The only reason we're in this

situation is because of this guy,

and now he's not even here with us.

So I'm definitely not thrilled

about that by any means.

Every day before court, I like

to get y'all meal orders in.

This is a binder of menus

in the area around here.

You all have to collectively

decide what you're gonna eat.

I'll do it. I'll take the orders.

I wanna be foreperson.

And Nikki saw how I took

charge with the lunch ordering,

and I could tell she was impressed.

So my hope is, is that she gets

my recommendation to Judge Rosen.

Her endorsement is key.

You guys can look at it,

but I was just saying Mexican

'cause it's, like, a nice group pleaser.

- I know, but we had that.

- What do you guys think?

Leadership is listening and

getting the most out of your team.

Is there anything apart from Mexican?

Uh, we, we're doing

We're doing Mexican today.

But whatever you like

I'm going to the

bathroom to rub one out.

Yep, do it now while you got the time.

So you could just tell me what you like.

- That wouldn't work.

- Why?

Little chilly in here today,

but I'm about to warm it

up with the heat of justice.

So here we go with that.

The plaintiff is alleging property

damage and emotional distress

in the neighborhood of around $2500.

Now, $2500 is a lot of money

Counsel, it's $1.8 million.

You just said $2500.

I'm sorry to interrupt. I just

don't want the jury to be confused.

I'm sorry, Your Honor. I-I

have a lot going on. Um

I think I might be

looking at the wrong

I kind of feel bad for him, just

'cause he's, he's trying his best,

but things aren't working.

And this is, like, what, the second day?

We were supposed to have filed

it on Wednesday, and I'm just

I'm so I'm so sorry.

Yeah, and I'm-I'm literally

in court right now.

Counsel?

Yes, Your Honor?

Are you talking to me, Counsel?

- I'm sorry?

- Were you talking to me?

No. I'm so sorry, Your

Honor. That was a, um

I got another

As promised, I have an animation today

that is, uh, equally awesome, um

to the animation you all saw yesterday.

So let me just get this set up.

I assure you

that this will be

worth the time.

- Copy.

- Tech.

- Your Honor.

- Set up.

Yeah?

Your Honor, I just got in my ear

that the restaurant that they order from

is closed on Fridays.

So

I think we're gonna pause for a second.

Folks, whoever ordered lunch,

apparently the place was closed.

You know what? Wait.

It's-It's-It's ten minutes to 12:00.

Let's break for about 40 minutes.

Counsel, if we take a break,

we gonna be ready? Today?

Absolutely, Your Honor.

Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

Okay.

I made sure I took out the

menu that y'all had before,

so just pay attention, read it better.

We ordered food and we can't eat it.

- So we're ordering again.

- Mm-hmm.

- This is not the menu.

- No.

Do you have the second

Mexican restaurant menu?

- No.

- Where is that at?

It's gotta have the same stuff.

I don't know why this is so hard.

- I don't know either.

- Yeah.

It's like we're always eating

and then occasionally

interrupted by court.

Listen, we don't have to do Mexican.

We could do pizzas or we could do subs.

We had subs yesterday.

Can we pull you guys

for a quick interview?

- Me? Yeah.

- Yeah, you and Ronald.

- Right here.

- Okay, I didn't want that anymore.

Oh, gosh. Oh, boy.

Someone get some paper towels.

There's paper towels over here.

So

Whoa!

Tim! Tim! Tim! Tim! Tim! Tim! Tim! Tim!

- You good?

- Oh, yeah. Ow!

Holy sh*t.

Look at me. Just don't move. Look at me.

- What was he doing?

- Just don't move.

God damn it.

Just don't move. Just look

at me. Look at me. You good?

- Ow.

- Just breathe.

Yeah.

Do we know if Nikki or

guys, can somebody

- What happened?

- I don't know.

- Yo, don't touch him.

- All right.

- What's his name?

- Tim.

Tim, are you okay?

My back hurts.

Okay. All right. Breathe in, okay.

911. What's your emergency?

He's very injured.

Hey, relax. I need

you to keep breathing.

- You okay, bud?

- Yeah.

Where you hurting?

Oh, sh*t!

Ow, he stepped on my hand.

Hey, I'm gonna pick this up.

Yep.

We got a, uh, fall. I just saw

it out of the corner of my eye.

Everything I think

I'm just glad I was there to provide

life-saving assistance to Tim.

You know, be a leader.

Hang in there.

- What's his name?

- Tim.

- We love you, Tim.

- Tim.

Heavenly Father, we call on you

right now in the name of Jesus.

Tim was easy to talk to. Like,

Tim was really nice to me.

He was super open, not judgmental.

He made me laugh, and we were laughing

continuously, like, ten minutes.

He was really nice and supportive,

and so I just really appreciated that.

And I hope that he's okay.

It's so sad what happened.

Todd, I don't know if you

know this, but he told me that

you kind of reminded him

of a little brother he had

that actually passed away

- Aw.

- when he was 18.

So maybe that's what

resonated with you and him.

He actually took a year off

between his high school senior year

and his freshman year of

college, and he went to Nepal,

and he got to learn,

uh, how to raise goats.

What he does is he finds old bicycles

- I remember that.

- from the '70s.

- He likes

- A red bike.

old bikes and he refurbishes them.

That's right. That's right.

And he gives them to poor

kids in the inner city.

Yeah, the kids.

And that, to me, is just amazing

that he would do something like that.

Tim made this.

Look at that. It's so sweet.

It's like a lucky bird.

He actually made me a crane as well.

And actually, he called me crane head.

I have a good memory with him.

I really feel sad and scared.

Damn, dude. Everyone got those?

- Oh, I did bring it.

- Oh, all right.

Did he give you a crane, or ?

No, I'm not a part of the

crane crew, unfortunately.

Ronald, you said you had

a couple interactions.

- Anything you want to share?

- Me?

I mean, we

It was very brief.

We literally just said a few

words, kind of in passing.

go to the bathroom and rub one out.

Yep, do it now while you got the time.

Just a couple sentences,

yeah, just passing by.

"How you doing?" Just things like that.

I'm just gonna do

pizzas, if that's cool.

I'm fine with that.

This is, like, so freaking ridiculous.

So now we're not even doing this.

She's getting pizzas.

- You don't have a choice now. It's pizza.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Oh, all right.

- Right? That's what we got.

- Wow.

- Do we know what kind of pizza she ordered?

- No.

- No.

Probably just the default.

First of all, gentleman number seven,

he's out of the woods from a

life-threatening standpoint.

He's not out of the woods

from a pain standpoint.

He will not be able to

continue sitting on the jury.

I have to appoint one

of these two gentlemen

as a full-fledged juror now.

No, no. You're number 14, correct?

Yes, sir.

Please sit down. Number 13.

You're gonna be our

new full-fledged juror.

Please come up.

I was thinking I was gonna

jump up on the jury today.

As an alternate, you know,

you kind of feel like

an afterthought, to some degree.

But Lonnie's great, and I

think he's gonna do a great job.

And you know, who knows?

Maybe there'll be another opportunity.

Another Tim or

Not not not in that way.

But, uh, you know, you never know.

It actually worked out for the best

'cause I'm supposed to be getting

the Lone Pine script soon,

and that's gonna require my

full, undivided attention,

so I wouldn't even have the

bandwidth to deal with all of this.

Lone Pine is the name of the movie,

by the way, in case anyone's confused.

Lonnie, what about you?

How does it feel to

move up to full juror?

Oh, I don't know. You know, it's chill.

You know, new chair. It

swivels and everything.

Kind of miss my, uh, my old spot.

Had a wall where I could put

my stuff and everything, so

You made it, brother. Promised land.

- Right

- Mm-mm.

I got this video queued

up from the cloud.

I've not had an opportunity

to watch this yet.

Are we showing it on the screen?

No, no, I'm gonna do it

directly from, uh, this guy.

So, as you can see here,

my client showed up for work

on the day of the incident.

And

this is

Just a second.

Uh, I'm gonna have to

have a talk with my nephew.

Wait, whoa, whoa.

- You know what?

- I wanna see it.

- The video is not

- Show it to me.

It's not working, Your Honor.

I don't understand. Um

Is this what the jury just saw?

Uh, that's I'm gonna

That's the whole thing?

Unfortunately, yes.

That is not what the whole

thing was supposed to be.

Not only was the animation so poor,

but it glitched and just froze up.

So, again, we only saw, like,

five or six seconds worth of video.

But it was crazy. It

was absolutely crazy.

It's like the defendant

is getting hosed.

He's showing very clear frustration.

He's banging his hands on the table

when his attorney can't

present a simple video.

It's a hot mess, to say the least.

Before I let you go for lunch,

uh, I had indicated to you

that a foreperson would

be appointed today.

I spoke with Nikki

and she advised me that

as frantic as the scene was when

juror number seven injured himself,

one of you was poised

and kept calm throughout.

Uh, juror number six.

My understanding is

that you showed guts,

or what I would call chutzpah,

by stepping up during

this time of crisis

and getting that lunch order in.

I'm just gonna do

pizzas, if that's cool.

I'm fine with that.

I'm hoping that you are up for it.

You're the guy who's in charge.

- Mm.

- For what that's worth.

Why don't we recess for lunch.

I want it to be known

that I didn't order lunch.

She did.

El Capitan.

- Dude, I thought he was gonna say you.

- My Captain, My Captain

You're the one who showed

poise. I didn't do sh*t.

Dude, I don't like this 'cause

if it was up to vote, I was like,

if I got voted in, I could just

tell him I didn't want to do it.

- I was like, if the judge gives

- Oh, you don't want it?

No, I don't want to [BLEEP] do it.

I didn't even order the

food. Nikki ordered the food.

That wasn't even me.

Maybe this is the universe

trying to tell you something.

Oh, thank God.

Should we toast to your new position?

No, we shouldn't.

Listen, man, when God blesses

you, just take the blessing, bro.

You know what? Um, I'm

fine not being foreperson.

And Ronald and I have actually

just started discussing

the possibility of me being

his assistant, so it's good.

I just wanted to present

this to my foreperson.

- My memory, I mean.

- Oh, dude, you don't gotta do that.

- Present to him. Present to him.

- But that's your memory.

I mean, I appreciate it, but

you don't gotta do that, Ravi.

- Yeah.

- Thank you.

Yeah, that's really nice.

On the next episode of Jury Duty.

Todd is a very interesting individual.

Oh, my God.

Would you like to interview

me about this same subject?

How would you characterize

your reputation?

Beyond reproach.

Coffee or methamphetamine or cocaine?

As long as you don't fall asleep.

- Don't worry.

- Okay.

I mean, yeah, that's my

girlfriend, but who's that?

Oh, sh*t!

Jump scare.

You're the foreperson.

And it's your duty to

keep the jury in line.

Are you capable of doing that?
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