05x26 - 57 Varieties

[bunniefuu]

Hey, Dad, I'm Back.

Did You Pick Up Grandma
And Grandpa's Mail?

Yep.

They'll Be Back Tomorrow
From Florida.

Here's Something
I Think You Should See.

They Won A Sweepstakes.

This Is A Come-On Letter
From A Subscription Service.

They Say You Won $ Trillion.

You Get Nothing.

This Does Not Say,
"You May Be A Winner."

It Says,
"You Are A Winner."

It Says, "Open Immediately."

What's Going On?

Grandma And Grandpa Might Be
Multimillionaires.

They Won A Sweepstakes.

We Received An Envelope
Just Like This Today.

I'll Show You.

Sorry, Son.

Wait A Minute.

This Is Different.

This One Says,
"You May Be A Winner."

This One Says,
"You Are A Winner."

Let's Open It.

You Can't.

Yes, You Can.

This Is Not Addressed To You.

It Says, "Open Immediately."

It Says, "Russell Huxtable,
Open Immediately."

I Am The Man's Son.

I Give You Permission
To Open It.

Does Theo Open Your Mail?

She Has A Point.

Hey, Man, I'm Not
Talking To You.

You Understand?

My Father Won't Be Here
Till Tomorrow.

If We Open It Now,
He May Get The Prize.

He's Got A Point.

Thank You, Son.

One Day Won't Result
In His Losing Any Prize.

My Father Is Up There In Age.

If He Opens That

And Finds Out
He's Won $ Trillion

Something May Happen
Up In His Chest.

If We Open It,
See The Ten Trillion

I Can Call Him In,
Tell Him Calmly

And He Won't Have Chest Pains.

That's Not A Good Point.

Who's Asking What You Think?

Open It.

Opening Someone's Mail
Constitutes Petty Theft.

You Can Do Time For That.

So This Letter Goes
In This Basket

Until Your Father Comes Back.

Okay, Miss Play-By-The-Book.

If My Father Wins Some Money

I'm Going To Tell My Father

That He And I Will Split It
And You'll Get

(Raspberry)

Nothing.

I'm Going To Study.

Mom, Dad, You Have
To See This Video.

It's The Lipsticks' Debut.

Who Are They?

Nobody Till : Today.

We Were Walking By
Latham's Department Store.

We Saw A Sign--

"Make Your Own
Videotapes."

What's More Important
Videos Or Eye Shadows?

We Said, "Videos."

Janet Said, "Eye Shadows."

That's How We Came Up
With The Name The Lipsticks.

Vanessa Thought
The Eye Shadows Sounded Better

But She Changed Her Mind
And That's Who We Are--

The Lipsticks.

Thank You.

Vanessa?

We Made A Video.

The Store Provided
The Background Music

We Provided The Vocals

And They Videotaped It.

Let's See It.

Okay.

(Rock 'N' Roll Music)

♪ Everybody's Doin'
A Brand-New Dance Now ♪

♪C'mon, Baby,
Do The Locomotion♪

♪ I Know You're Gonna Like It
If You Give It A Chance Now ♪

♪C'mon, Baby,
Do The Locomotion♪

♪ My Little Baby Sister
Can Do It With Ease ♪

♪ It's Easier Than Learnin'
Your Abc's ♪

♪So C'mon, C'mon,
Do The Locomotion With Me♪

Channel Is Having A Contest

For The Best Amateur
Music Video.

We'll Put Together
New Outfits

Redo The Video And Send It In.

The Winner Gets An Audition
For A Record Contract.

One Of Our Songs
Might Become A Hit.

We'd Go On Tour

And Become
Real Famous

And We Could Take School
In Our Own Plane

With Teachers That We Hired.

Do You Think

We Could Win?

What I've Seen Is That You All
Have The Moves.

Now, The Singing?

Uh...

I'd Say... Uh...

You Have Raw Talent.

That's What The Video Lady Said.

We're Like A Diamond
In The Rough.

She Said If We Had Voice Lessons

We Could Be Really Good.

She Gave Us The Name
And Number Of A Singing Teacher.

How Many Lessons Will We Need?

Probably Just One.

(Woman Scatting)

♪ We're Moving ♪

♪ Moving ♪

♪ Moving On ♪

All Right, Guys,
That's All For Today.

Thank You Very Much.

Miss Woods?

I'm Vanessa Huxtable.

I Called About
The Singing Lessons.

You Must Be The Lipsticks.

In Person.

Young Persons, Too.

We Have The Moves.

We Just Want To Sound Better.

Let's See What You Got.

Okay.

Let's Do The First Verse
Of "The Locomotion."

Do You Want Us On The Stage?

No, Right There's Good.

Five, Six, Seven, Eight.

♪ Everybody's Doin'
A Brand-New Dance Now ♪

♪C'mon, Baby,
Do The Locomotion♪

♪ I Know You're Gonna Like It
If You Give It A Chance Now ♪

♪C'mon, Baby,
Do The Locomotion♪

What Do You Think?

It's Nice.

♪Bay, Bay, Bay, Bay,
Bay, Bay, Bay, Bay♪

♪ Bee, Bee, Bee, Bee,
Bee, Bee, Bee, Bee ♪

♪Bee, Bee, Bee, Bee,
Bee, Bee, Bee, Bee♪

♪Zinga, Zinga, Zinga, Zinga
Zinga, Zinga♪

We Can Move On
To "Grulla Crulla"

(Plays Phrase)

♪ Grulla Crulla ♪

♪Grulla Crulla, Grulla Crulla♪

Miss Woods,
We Only Have

Five Minutes Left
In The Lesson.

Could We Sing Our Song To See
If We've Gotten Any Better?

Let's See
What You've Got.

All Right!

Five, Six, Seven, Eight.

♪Everybody's Doin'
A Brand-New Dance Now♪

Whoa, Whoa, Whoa.

Breathe From
Your Diaphragm

But Let The Tones
Come From Your Head.

Lift, Lift.

Again.

♪Everybody's Doin'...♪

Ladies...

First Word Again, Please?

♪Every♪

♪Body♪

That's Great.

That's All For Today, Ladies.

♪ ... All Night Long ♪

♪ One Thing
I Know You Can Do ♪

♪ You Can Do It To Me
All Night Long ♪

♪ Uh-Huh, Baby ♪

♪ Do It To Me
All Night Long ♪

♪ 'Cause You Do It Just Right ♪

♪ So Do It All Night... ♪

Hey, Why Did You Do That?

What Are You Listening To?

The Radio.

That Song Was Playing
On The Radio?

Yeah.

It's Called

"Do It To Me
All Night Long."

Would You Tell Me, Um...

What Does "It" Mean?

Daddy, You Know What "It" Means.

Yes, I Do

But I Want To Know
If You Know What "It" Means.

"It" Means Holding Hands
And Kissing.

Holding Hands And Kissing?

Yes, But That's Not All
That "It" Means.

What Else Does

"It" Mean?

It Means, Uh...

Homework.

"It" Is Homework.

"Baby, Do My Homework
All Night Long."

Okay.

Okay.

♪ Baby, Do My Homework
All Night Long ♪

There You Go.

(Teapot Whistling)

Oh, Sounds Like
You're Making Tea.

Yes.
Would You Like A Cup?

No, But I Figured

If I Showed You
This Sweepstakes Envelope

You Might Know What You
Could Do With That Teapot.

Are You Suggesting

That I Place That Envelope
Near The Steam

So It Might Open Up?

I'm Merely Bringing It Up
As A Possibility.

Well, I Think That As A Son,
You Have Hit An All-Time Low.

You're Right, Dad.

I'll Just Put This Back.

Now, Because I Don't
Trust You, My Boy

I Am Going To Keep
This Envelope Away From You

Because I Don't Trust
Anything You Do.

How Dare You Suggest

That I Do Something Like This?

Do You Understand
What I'm Saying To You?

And Don't Ever
Try It Again.

You Two Are
Pathetic, Pitiful...

And Predictable.

See, You Got Me
In A Whole Lot Of Trouble.

Aha!

♪ Do-Do-Do-Do-Bee ♪

Listen, I Apologize
For Acting Like A Sleaze, Okay?

Think Nothing Of It.

I'll Sit With You.

Do A Little
Light Reading.

Oh, What
Should I Read?

What Should I Read?

I'll Close My Eyes
And Let's Get It...

Oh, What Is This
I'm Touching?

You Were Spying On Me.

Yes, You
Were Spying.

No, I Wasn't.

I Think You
Can Go To Jail

For Hiding
People's Mail.

Hey!

How You Doing?

There They Are,
The Rolly Pops.

How Did It Go?

We Learned We Don't Need
Singing Lessons From Miss Woods.

She Didn't
Even Let Us Sing.

All We Did Was

Be-Be-Be

Zinga-Zinga-Zee.

We Don't Want
To Sing Like That.

I Don't Think You're
Being Fair To Miss Woods

And What She's
Trying To Do.

You Want To Get To The Song

But She Taught You
Breathing Exercises.

Correct?

Same Thing
Happened To Me.

I Wanted To Be A Drummer.

Had My Own Set.

I Heard Art Blakey Play,
Bought His Records

Tried To Copy Him.

I Couldn't Get It.

So I Went Down
To A Teacher.

I Said, "I Want To Learn
How His Left Hand Does

"Di-Di-Di-Di-Di

"While The Right Hand Does

Ding-Di-Ding-Ding."

The Man Said

"I Know What
You're Talking About."

He Put The Set Aside,
Pulled Out A Block

And He Said,
"Do Like This--

"Whack-Whack

Whack-Whack."

I Said, "I Don't
Want To Go Whack-Whack.

I Want Diga-De-Diga-
De-Diga-De-Diga"

He Said, "In Order To Get
To That You Got To Go

Whack-Whack-Whack."

That's A Great Story

But It Doesn't Have
Anything To Do With Us.

We Don't
Play Drums.

We Sing.

Yeah.

But You Don't Sing Well... Yet.

We Don't Have To Sing Well.

You Don't?

There's This Group
Called W-Four.

And?

They Can't Sing.

When They're In
The Recording Studio

The Engineer Fixes Their Voices.

That's What We'll Do.

Wait Till You See
What We Look Like!

We'll Put On The Outfits
And Show You Our Routine.

All Right.

All Right!

♪ Motion, Yeah! ♪

♪ Motion, Woo! ♪

Mom, Dad, We're Ready!

Okay.

So Where Are They?

They Have To Make
Their Entrance.

Ladies
And Gentlemen

Presenting Live
In The Huxtable Living Room

The New, The Improved Lipsticks!

(Rock 'N' Roll Music)

♪ Everybody's Doin'
A Brand-New Dance Now ♪

♪C'mon, Baby,
Do The Locomotion♪

♪ I Know You're Gonna Like It
If You Give It A Try Now ♪

♪C'mon, Baby,
Do The Locomotion♪

♪ My Little Baby Sister
Can Do It With Ease ♪

♪ It's Easier To Learn
Than Your Abc's ♪

♪So C'mon, C'mon,And Do The Locomotion With Me♪

♪You Gotta Swing
Your Hips Now...♪

Mom, Why Did
You Do That?

We're Not
Finished Yet.

Yes, You Are.

I Thought They Were Hot.

Maybe You Should Go
Up To Your Room

And Cool Off.

Aw, Man.

Mrs. Huxtable

Is There
Something Wrong?

I Don't Know Who
You Think You Are

But You Are Not The People

Who Just Came Down Here
In My Living Room Half Dressed

Flinging Parts
From One End To The Other.

Are My Eyes Deceiving Me?

Aren't You All Swollen In Areas

Where You Weren't
Swollen Before?

Thank You, Because I
Definitely Detect Some Growth.

Mom!

That's Part
Of Our Outfits.

The Only Part Of Your Clothing

That You Will Be Allowed
To Stuff Things Into

Will Be Your Pockets.

You Go Put
Some Clothes On.

I'm Not Your Mother,
But I Speak For Them

When I Say Go Cover Yourselves

Immediately.

Yes, Mrs. Huxtable.

I Finally Thought They Were
Old Enough To Understand

I'm Not A Child
Anymore.

And Don't Put Those Tissues
Back In The Box!

Did You See Kara
With That Bra On

On Top Of Her Leotard?

Did I See It?

We Have Made
A Mistake.

We Have Planted Roses,
But We Keep Getting Weeds.

Sondra's In
The Wilderness

Denise Is In The Jungle

And She's On "The Locomotion."

Take That w*r Paint
Off Your Faces!

Before Their Mothers
Come In Here And Blame Me.

Running
Around Here

Like They Just Hopped Off
The Hot Seat.

Suppose Some Fool
Comes Along, Sees That

Takes Them Seriously...

Vanessa Could End Up
Across The Country

In A Smoke-Filled Cafe

Singing And Dancing
And Gyrating Like That.

I Won't Be Around

To Take
The Tissues Out.

What Do
They Know?

"Easy As Doing
Your Abc's..."

Miss , On The S.A.T.

I Got Your Locomotion
Down Here With A Science Book!

Right.

And Take That Makeup Off!

That's Right.

I Can See Her Now

In A Hollywood Swimming Pool

With A Remote Phone,
Calling Me Up:

"Hi, Mom, Babe.
Let's Do Lunch."

I'll Not Have It!

And That Goes For Me, Too.

Vanessa, Clair,
The Show Starts At : .

We Got Five.

(Doorbell)

Hey!
Hey!

All Right!

How You Doing?

Here's Your Mail.

All Right.

Bang!

There It Is.

I Dropped
Your Mother Off.

Did I Tell You About

The Fishing I Did In Florida?

Yeah.

Open This Up, Please.

I'll Open It With Your Mother.

No, Don't Wait
And Do It With Her.

Cliff, Calm Down.

Have You Been Eating
Sugar Products?

No, Sir.

Just Open This Up.

We'll Tell Mom Later.

All Right,
I'll Open It.

All Right.

There You Go.

If You Don't Mind.

Uh-Oh.

What?

This Is Unbelievable.

I Have Never Won Anything
In My Life And Now This.

What?

I Am The Winner

Of A Stainless Steel
Toaster.

"Makes Up To
Eight Slices."

I'm So Lucky.

I'll See You Later, Son.

Stop Over Any Time
You Want Some Toast.

Announcer:
Ladies And Gentlemen

Count's Proudly Presents
Miss Amanda Woods.

(Slow Jazz)

♪ To Have His Love ♪

♪ Is All That A Girl
Could Want ♪

♪ To Hold Him Close Is Heaven ♪

♪ To Watch The Sun
Come Up Each Day ♪

♪ With Joy, I Took A Chance ♪

♪ And There He Was ♪

♪ For Me ♪

♪ Look What I Got To Kiss
Every Night Now ♪

♪ Look What I Got
To Hold Hands In The Park With ♪

♪ I Got A Man ♪

♪ I Got A Brand-New Dance ♪

♪ Motion ♪

♪Motion♪

(Giggling)

♪ Look What I Got ♪

♪ I Got Love,
I Got Love, I Got Love ♪