03x03 - Golden Anniversary

[bunniefuu]

The Troops
Are Snoring.

Everything
Downstairs
Is Locked.

Good.

Cliff, This Planning
For Your Parents' th
Wedding Anniversary

Has Started Me Thinking.

We Have To Do Something
Really Special

For Our th Anniversary.

But Dear,
We've Been Married Years.

What About The rd Anniversary?

You Just Don't Want To
Whisk By That.

No, I Don't Want To Whisk By It.

You Just Went
Right To The th.

I Mean, You Had The rd
In Your Rearview Mirror.

The rd Was Sitting
There On The Curb

With His Head Down,
Just Saying

"I Don't Know Why
She Doesn't Like Me."

"Just Because
She Can't Divide Me By Five.

"I Mean, I'm An Anniversary

"And I'm A Good Anniversary

So Don't Be Putting That ' '
In My Face."

Cliff, I Agree.
Every Anniversary Is Special.

That's Right.

I'll Tell You Something Else--

This rd Anniversary Will Be
The Best One You've Ever Had.

Is This So?

Absolutely.

You Have Something
Planned?

That Is Correct.

Something Special.

That Is Correct.

What Is It?

I Don't Have
To Tell You
Everything.

Anna.

I Must Have Dozed Off.

Yes, You Did.

What Time Is It?

It's One Minute
Past Midnight.

Tomorrow Is Today.

And Today Is Our
Anniversary.

That's Right.

Happy...

th Anniversary.
th Anniversary.

This Is Jasmine.

With A Little Nutmeg.

Oh, Russell, You Devil.

Why? Just Because
I Brought You Tea?

You Brought Me Jasmine Tea
With Nutmeg On Our Wedding Night

And You Know It.

Yes, I Do.

You Brought It Up To The Room

And You Served It
On A Silver Tray

With One Red Rose.

I Was Pretty Romantic
That Night.

Ooh... Yes You Were.

Maybe This Time
I Get To Finish The Tea.

Maybe Not.

What Time
Is It, Dear?

It's Five After Midnight.

All Right.

I'm Going To Call
Mother And Father

And Wish Them
A Happy th Anniversary.

Now? It's A Little Late,
Don't You Think?

Yeah, You're Probably Right.

They've Been Sleeping
A Long Time By Now.

Listen!

I Just Made Up My Mind.

I Know Exactly What We'll Do
On The rd Wedding Anniversary.

All Right,
Cliff.

What Is It?

First Of All

We Get On The Plane
And We Fly To Paris.

Meeting Us
At The Plane

Is A Limousine

And Behind The Limousine
Is A Truck.

The Truck Is Empty.

We Drive Into The Middle

Where All Of The Shops
Happen To Be

And I Give You
My Credit Card.

The Truck Follows You

As You Walk Up And Down
The Street

Going In
And Out
Of Stores.

When You Finish With That Card,
You Come Back To Me.

I Give You Another Card.

Now...

You've Got A Truck
And A Limousine.

We Then Go To A Private Airport.

I Have A Plane That Is Rented.

The Limousine And The Truck
Get Into This Plane.

We Then Fly To Italy.

The Truck, The Plane
And The Limousine Stay There

While We Just Go
To The Trevi Fountain

Take Our Shoes Off

And Walk Around.

Then We Go Back
To The Airport

Where A Larger Plane Has
The Small Plane, The Limousine

And The
Truck.

Cliff, I Don't Need All That.

You Don't?

All I Need Is You.

Aw...

On Our rd
Wedding Anniversary...

Uh-Huh.

All I Need Is You.

And That Trip To Paris.

Cliff:
What Do
You Think?

Rudy:
Looks Good.

Thank You.

Daddy?

Uh-Huh?

How Come It's Called
A "Golden" Anniversary?

It's Called
A Golden Anniversary

Because Gold Is A Very Rare
And Precious Metal

And To Be Married Years
Is Rare And Precious.

I'm Going To Be Married
For Years, Too.

Are You?

And Guess What Else?

What?

I'm Getting Married
When I'm .

.

And I'm Going To Have
Two Children.

One Will Be A Boy
And One Will Be A Girl.

All Right.

And I'll Have
A Dog Named Tiffany.

And I'll Have A Husband
Named Bud.

A Husband Named "Bud"?

Bud What?

Bud Huxtable.

Look Who's Here,

Hi, Denise!

(Zrbbt)

I Zrbbt You.

Right!

And I Zrbbt You...

(Zrbbt)

Too.

How's School?

It's Great.

Where's Sondra And Elvin?

They're Having A Discussion
On Where To Park.

You Mean A Fight.

I Took The Bus
To Princeton

So I Could Have A Nice
Ride Home With Them.

Big Mistake.

They Fought The Entire Way.

They Fought Over
Who Would Drive

Which Highway To Take

Where To Stop For Gas

When To Stop For Gas

Who Would Pump The Gas.

You Have To Talk To Them.

I Will.

Where's Mom?

In The Kitchen.

I'm Going To Go Say Hi.

Hi, Dad.

How Are
You?

Fine.

Hi, Elvin.

Hi, Dr. Huxtable.

How's School?
Fine.

How Was The Trip?

Nice.
Nice.

Really?

It Was Wonderful--
A Lot Of Fun.

Excellent.

Probably The Best Trip
I Have Ever Had.

How Can You Say That?

Dad, You Might
As Well Know.

It Was A Miserable Trip.
We Fought All The Way Home.

Yes, Okay.

We Decided Since We
Were Visiting My Family

I'd Pay For Gas

But He Wouldn't
Let Me Pump It.

Dr. Huxtable,
That Is A Man's Job.

Elvin, There's No Such Thing
As A "Man's Job."

Why Couldn't I
Pump The Gas?

It Wouldn't Look Right.

I See.

I Can't Pump Gas

But You'll Have Me
Make You A Sandwich?

That's Different.

How?

Pumping Gas Makes Your Hands
Dirty And Smelly.

Women Should Not Smell
Like Gasoline.

Women Should Smell Like...
Sandwiches.

Elvin, That's
Ridiculous.

No, It Isn't.

Yes, It Is.

No, It Isn't.

Yes, It Is.

May I Suggest Something?

Sure, Dad.

Why Don't You Get Away From
Each Other For About An Hour

And Give Yourselves Time To
Think About Your Relationship

And The Problems
That You're Having

And Why You're
Bringing Them Here.

All Right.

I'll Just Go Upstairs
And Unpack.

Have A Good Time,
Honey.

Elvin.

Yes.

Elvin.

Yes?

(Sigh Of Exasperation)

I Know, Sir.
I Get On Sondra's Nerves.

You Get On Her Nerves

You Get In Her Nerves

You Get Around Her Nerves.

I Know, Sir, But I'm Confused
About My Duties As A Man.

Your Duties?

What I'm Supposed To Do
And What I'm Not Supposed To Do.

If I Offer To Take
Sondra's Luggage

She Says,
"I Can Do This Myself."

But If I Don't
Open A Door For Her

She Gets Angry
And Calls Me Inconsiderate.

Please, Dr. Huxtable, Tell Me--
What Is My Job?

Your Job Is To Get Out.

Sir?

No. I Don't Mean
To Leave The House.

Thank You.

I'm Saying

The Luggage Is There.

You Go To Pick It Up.

She Says, "Elvin,
I Can Handle That Myself."

It's Time For You
To Go To The Door.

You Go To Open The Door.

She Says,
"Elvin, I Can Do It Myself."

You
Got It?

Dad?
Yes, Dear?

Oh, Hi, Elvin.

Hi, Vanessa.

Mom Needs Help With
A Jar That Won't Open.

I'll Do It.

Well, Thanks.

Elvin.

Hello, Mrs. Huxtable.

Hi, Elvin.

I Understand You're
Having Jar Trouble.

Allow Me.

It's Like Cement.

That's No Problem.

This Is One Job
I'm Not Confused About.

What Do You Mean?

This Is A Man's Job.

What's A Man's Job?

Opening A Jar
When A Woman Can't Do It.

Really?
I Didn't Know That.

My Hands Must Be
A Little Slippery.

Thank You.

Having Trouble, Elvin?

I'm Not Done Yet.

You Know,
Elvin

If Opening A Jar Is A Man's Job
And You Can't Do It...

Hey, Mom.

Sondra. Hi.

Hey.

Hi.
Hi.

What Are You Doing?

I'm Opening A Jar
For Your Mom.

He's Been Opening It
For Five Minutes.

Well, Let Me Try.

I Can
Do It.

No, Come On, Elvin...

Sondra, I'm
Perfectly Capable...

There You Go, Mom.

Thanks, Sondra.

You're A Real Man.

Cliff, Relax.

They'll Be Here
Any Minute.

Well, That's That.

How's It Going?

We Finished The Salad.

Sondra And I Made A Vow
Not To Fight Tonight.

We Discussed Things

And I Promised
To Be More Sensitive

To The Way She Feels.

I'm Happy For You.

All Set.

I'll Help Out
In The Kitchen.

Wait, Sondra.

What, Elvin?

You Look Stunning.

Thank You.

That Dress Really
Accentuates Your Beauty.

I've Never Seen You
Look So Radiant.

Elvin...

Yes?

This Is The Fourth Time
You've Seen Me In This Dress.

It Is?

Obviously, The First Three Times
Meant Nothing To You.

They Meant A Lot To Me.

I Just Don't Remember Them.

Elvin.

I Know, Sir.

I Didn't Go...

No, No, No, No, No.

Elvin, You Never, Never Say
You Didn't Remember.

Never.

Never.

Uh-Uh.

Okay.

How Long Do You Think
That Relationship Will Last?

Forever.

(Doorbell)

Who Is It?

It's Your Mother.

No, It's Some Old People
Married Years.

Happy Anniversary.

♪ Happy Anniversary. ♪

Happy Anniversary To You.

Where Are Our Beautiful
Grandchildren?

They're In The Kitchen
Cooking Dinner.

I Want To See Them.

Yes.

Listen.

Last Night--

After Midnight--

We Wanted To Call

But We Figured You
Were Probably Sleeping.

We Didn't Want
To Wake You.

We Were Awake.

Way Past Midnight.

Get Caught Up In One Of
Those Late-Night Movies?

Nope.

You Were Playing Cards?

No.

Were You Reading?

Well,
What Were You Doing?

Mmm...

Well, Now, Anna

I Want To Know
The Truth.

Can I Expect
The Same From That One?

Till The Grave.

Wonderful Dinner.

That Shrimp Creole
Was Delicious.

Are You Two Ready To
Dance The Night Away

To The Count Basie
Orchestra?

Yes, But Are We
Leaving Now?

We Have To.

We Have Reservations.

As I Recall, Last
Year After Dinner

The Whole Family
Performed A Song.

We Loved That.

We Didn't Have Time
To Put One Together This Year.

Heathcliff,
We Want Our Song.

You Heard Clair.

There's No Song.

Now, Get Out.

We're Not Going Anywhere
Until We Get Our Song.

You Sit Here.

You'll Have A Fine View
When They Start.

Okay, But, Uh...

Okay, Okay,
There Is A Song.

I Knew It.

What Is It This Year?

Another
Ray Charles Number?

One From
"Old Blue Eyes"?

Gene Autry Singing
"Back In The Saddle Again."

I Like Him.

It Isn't Gene Autry.

This Year
It's Anna's Favorite Singer--

James Brown.

And A One, Two...

One, Two, Three, Four.

(♪Musical Introduction♪)

♪ Ah-Ha-Ha-Ha! ♪

♪ I Got That Feelin' ♪

♪Baby, Baby,
I Got That Feelin' ♪

♪ You Don't Know ♪

♪ What You Do To Me ♪

♪ Leave My Heart Heavy
And Down In Misery ♪

♪ Hey... ♪

♪ All Right ♪

♪ Ow! ♪

♪ Hey, Hey... ♪

♪ Ow! ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪I Got
That Feelin', Baby ♪

♪ Can't Help It ♪

♪ All Right! ♪

♪ Baby, Baby, Baby ♪

♪ Baby, Baby, Baby ♪

♪ Baby, Baby, Baby, Baby, Baby ♪

♪ I Got That Feelin', Baby ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪ Sometimes I'm Up ♪

♪ Sometimes I'm Down ♪

♪ My Heart... ♪

♪ I'm A Rounder Down ♪

♪ I'm Level With The Ground ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪ I Said Level With The Ground ♪

♪ Hey, Baby ♪

(Grunt)

(Grunt)

(Grunt)

(Grunt)

♪ Waaaaaa... ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪ I Got That Feelin', Baby ♪

♪ Can't Help It ♪

♪ All Right ♪

♪ Baby, Baby,
Baby ♪

♪ Baby, Baby,
Baby ♪

♪ Baby, Baby, Baby ♪

♪ Baby, Baby ♪

♪ I Want To... ♪

♪ I Want To... ♪

(Grunt)

♪ Oh! ♪

♪ Wa-Wa-Waaaa! ♪

Happy Anniversary!

(♪Big Band Music♪)

Bandleader: Thank You Very Much.

Ladies And Gentlemen,
We Have With Us Tonight

One Of The Original Members
Of "The Jazz Caravan"--

None Other Than
Mr. Slide Huxtable.

(Applause)

He's Here
With His Lovely Wife, Anna

Celebrating Their
th Wedding Anniversary.

(Drum Roll)

Their Son Told Me...

I Assume He's Trustworthy...

That Their Favorite Basie Tune
Is "Shiny Stockings."

We're Going To Play That Tune

If The Huxtables
Will Lead Off In The Dancing.

(♪"Shiny Stockings"♪)