Halloween House Party (2020)

[bunniefuu]

Hey, guys, welcome to Disney Channel
Halloween House Party!

We've got a great show
in store for you,

and we can't wait to get started!

To kick things off, I'm gonna
sing this new Halloween song

-that I just wrote.
-[record needle scratches]

Hey, you singin'?

Count me in!

Oh, hey, uh, this
is my brother, Timmy.

I love you, bro, but I was gonna sing
the song alone, if that's cool.

Let me get in on that.

You're on TV all the time,

but you're not the only
talent in this family.

Sorry, it's like this
every day in my house.

It's Timmy's time to shine.

Look, I can dance!

(funky music playing)

I can act!

Coach, maybe the odds
are against us,

but if you put me in the game,
I'll win it for us!

And I can...

♪ Siiiiing ♪

-What's going on, guys?
-Oh boy,

uh, this is my brother, Teddy.

I wrote a new song,
and I was about to do it--

Why didn't you tell us
you're gonna be on TV?

You should have let us know.

We would have showed up.

(overlapping conversations)

The song is just gonna have to wait!
Let's start the show!

You gotta let us know these things!

♪♪

(spooky laughter)

Narrator: It has been a time of peace
for the people of Auradon

and the Isle of the Lost.

It's so great that our two lands
get to live together in harmony.

My mother, Maleficent,
would have hated this.

(crowd cheering)

I have a terrible feeling that
my mother, the Evil Queen,

might soon return.

Look! I found my father
Jafar's old scarab!

I wonder what happens
if I rub it? (snickers)

I still can't believe you're
marrying Audrey tomorrow.

Daughter of Princess Aurora
marrying you,

Harry, the son of Captain Hook.

Ah!

Not... so... fast!

I'm afraid this little celebration

wasn't planning on my evil scheme!

I'm sorry, who are you?

I am Baxter Callahan,

step-nephew to Dr. Doofenshmirtz!

Right. And, uh, that is...

He's the villain
from Phineas and Ferb?

I don't know who that is.

Come on, guys, you--

This guy.

(crickets chirp)

Come on, he's like one
of the main villains.

He's Perry the Platypus'
archnemesis.

(chuckles) I'm sorry.
I've never watched that show.

Sorry, but we're all, like, the children

of legendary villains
from classic animated musicals,

so you might have the wrong address.

No, I know, but they're, um,
they're kinda running out of those.

So... here I am.

Did you say you were
Dr. Doofenshmirtz's step-nephew?

Yeah. Yeah.
So, when my mom remarried,

she married his brother.

I actually haven't met him
that-that many times,

but, um, he came
to Thanksgiving once.

Okay, I don't have time for this.

Come on, Harry,
let's go check up on Audrey.

Wait! No, you guys, don't you
wanna hear about my evil plan?

I-I spent all summer on this.

Narrator: Descendants .

Yeah, we might have made
too many of these.

Hi. My name is Helena.
I am a ghost.

I have been haunting
Sycamore Lane since .

These are the pictures
of all the families

who have lived here
throughout the years,

starting with the Suttons.

Uh, they were here until...

(clicks tongue)
...duh-duh-duh...

.

Lot of sleepless nights
for that little boo.

Oh, "boo." See what I did.
(chuckles)

That's when
the Callahans moved in.

I actually made
a grown man poop himself.

Oh! And these were the Templetons.

Iloved haunting the Templetons.

And that's when
the Branfords moved in.

Mr. Branford and his daughter.

I hate them.

Hey! Ghost lady!

-(objects clattering)
-The Branfords are here!

Whoo!

We're super excited
to be haunted!

Do your worst!

They moved in...

because they heard
the house had a ghost.

Th-th-they like
being haunted! What?

(growling)

(both laughing)

Really?

The laughing is so much worse

than them just not
being scared, you know,

because it actually feels very belittling.

-And I--
-Ha! I see you, ghost lady.

Yep, you opened the door
and here I am. I--

What are you doing?

-Uh, it's an interview.
-Can I be in your movie?

-No.
-Okay, so, guess what?

Today, my friend Brandy was
totally making fun of Kimberly,

and then Kimberly accused
Brandy of copying her

for wearing the same pair of shoes.

But Brandy said she got hers last week.

And Kimberly said she wore
hers first and that Brandy needs--

So now I'm stuck with them.

They never clean.
They let dishes pile up for weeks!

It's disgusting. Ugh!

Now I smell like dead eggs.

Okay, who finished the milk

and put the empty carton
back in the fridge?

-Hmm?
-Guilty.

No. I'm not your maid, okay.
I'm your ghost.

Uhhh, boo.
(chuckles)

(sighs)

Ugh!

I've been in this house almost years,

and this is the first time I feel trapped.

Spirit, I summon you.

If you are here now,
make your presence known!

Excuse me, can you stop
doing that, please.

The laws of the undead
say that I have

to actually come in here
when you say that.

-So, it, like-- it's a little bit--
-Spirit!

"Helena" is fine.

-Spirit!
-(Helena sighs)

Do you have a message
for me from beyond?

No, actually, I was just
doing your laundry,

because that's the only way
things get done around this house.

Does Tyler Mitchum
have a crush on me?

I'm gonna hazard a guess
and say no because you're annoying.

Nobody likes an annoying person.

Ugh! I am a ghost,
not a fortune-teller.

I-I can't predict the future.

I don't know lottery numbers. I--

I already called the main office
and asked for a transfer

'cause I can't do this anymore.

Hey, ghostie. Me and the boys are
going bowling and the sitter canceled.

-You okay to watch the kid?
-No! I'm a ghost.

You're supposed to be scared of me.

Okay.

Well, if you need to scare up
some food, there's pizza on the sofa,

and I left my phone number
on the fridge.

It's like who's haunting who, right?

So... do you think they'll air
this thing anyways, or...?

-Cameraman: No.
-I'll still get paid, though, right?

(cameraman chuckles)
No.

(Timmy and Teddy shouting)

While I hold my brothers off,
you stick around.

We'll be right back with more show.

I'm not letting you in!

-Timmy: We're serious.
-Teddy: I'm gonna tell Mom.

Announcer: Five years ago,

Smushers Farms introduced
no-crust sandwiches,

for all the boys and girls out there
who don't like crust.

But what about the kids
who love the crust?

Isn't there anything for us?

Announcer: There is now!

Introducing Completely Crusts!

Yeah!

Announcer: Completely Crusts!
All crust, all the time!

Wow!

Announcer: We've taken all the leftover
crusts from our No-Crust sandwiches

and smushed them up
into a big crust ball!

And Completely Crusts comes
in a wide variety of flavors!

PB&J crusts!

Quesadilla crusts!

Mm-mmm.
That's real quesadilla-y.

And Mystery Crust!
A surprise in every bite.

(crunching)

Hey, what is this one?

Announcer: We have no idea!

That's the fun.

Completely Crusts!

It's not just old crusts,

it's old crusts in a bag!

(spits)

Hey, guys. Finally found
a little privacy in my room.

I'm gonna sing you my Halloween song.

(clears throat)

Told you he was hiding in his room!

You ain't singing without us! Yeah!

♪ Hey, we're Tobie's brothers
and we're coming your way ♪

♪ Yeah, we're Tobie's brothers
and we like to play ♪

♪ We're all super talented ♪

Guys, I love you, but--

Okay, if I can't sing my song,
at least you can hear this one.

"Where My Ghouls At?"

♪ And we're Tobie's brothers ♪

♪ And we all are great ♪

Some...

Put y'all's selves in the show.

(electric guitar riff playing)

♪♪

(wolf howling)

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Uh! Come on! ♪

-♪ Ooh ♪
-♪ Uh! Uh! ♪

Hey, guys. Welcome to
In the Kitchen with Sarah Jansen.

I am your host, Sarah.

In case you missed
last week's show,

let me catch you up to speed.

After a disagreement
at a farmers market

over the last jar of honey,

a witch cast a spell on me
and turned me into a dog.

Nevertheless, I'm not going to let
the fact that I am a dog stop me!

So, in honor of Halloween,

today we are going to be doing
one of my favorite recipes.

Pumpkin chocolate chip
banana muffins!

It's gonna be... spook-tacular.
Let's get started.

First things first: You're going
to want to peel two bananas

and mash them up
in a bowl until smooth.

(grunts)
Here's where being a dog

starts to become
a real nuisance for me.

You know what, we're just gonna
throw that whole banana in there.

Now, you're gonna wanna mash
those bad boys up really well.

(grunting) Ooh!

Can't hold a tool because
you don't have thumbs?

Feel free to just use your paws!

Then you're gonna go ahead
and pour a half a cup

of melted butter onto the bananas.

I cannot reach the microwave
to melt the butter,

so I'm just gonna squish it up
real good right here.

Ahh! Some people have written me
on social media and said,

"Sarah, what's the worst thing
about being a dog?"

It's gotta be that my own
husband didn't recognize me

and took me to an animal shelter.

But luckily, a nice woman
named Linda adopted me.

Ohh, there you go!

And then we add our two eggs.

Since I don't have hands,

I'm just gonna try
and bite them really quick.

Oh! Oh, okay,
well, that went poorly.

Just gonna push that onto my paws

and try to scrape it in there.

And then I'm gonna taste
the raw eggs while I'm at it.

Nom, nom, nom.

Oh, now's the time I would
normally add the chocolate chips,

but chocolate is actually
poisonous to dogs,

so, instead, I'm going
to be substituting

some leftover kibble
I've been holding in my mouth

since breakfast.

Nom, nom, nom.

Okay, give that all a good mix.

This is, this is just a real mess here.

I don't even know why I try.

-(door opens)
-(gasps) Oh, man.

Linda is gonna freak
when she sees her kitchen!

I gotta go hide under
the dining room table,

but tune in next week
and remember what I always say,

"Stay away from witches
at the farmers market

or they might turn you into a dog."

(gasps) Till next time!

Linda: Sarah!
Outta the kitchen! Bad dog!

Hi, everyone.
Thanks so much for logging on

to honor the memory
of Jake's beloved goldfish, Edgar.

Jake's been taking it pretty hard.

He's been up in his room
since the incident.

Look, buddy, everyone's here.

Thanks for coming.

Since we all looked at Edgar
as a member of the family,

we thought it would be nice
to get the rest of the family

to hop on and share a few memories,

uh, their favorite memories about him.

I guess I'll kick things off.

When Jake first met Edgar
at the carnival--

(loudly) Testing!
Testing! Anybody there?

Lyle, the computer's busted again.
Your stupid online course did nothing.

You do not know how to do repairs.

No, it's all good, Aunt Betty.
We can hear you.

Who said that?

-It's Henry.
-Uh, this is John. Henry said that.

Aunt Betty, it-it's Lily.

-We can all see you.
-Aunt Betty: Lyle!

Let's just pause for a second
while Aunt Betty gets herself together.

Sorry about this!

This is only the fortieth time
that I've video chatted,

so I'm still working out the kinks!

This is Henry now,
and, uh, there are no kinks.

Everything's fine.

Okay, just a second now.

Enable video.

And, um...

there.

How about now?

Aunt Betty, you have some type
of zany filter on your face

that makes you look like a cat.

-That's fine. Let's just continue--
-Aunt Betty: Lyle!

No! Well, hold on. That won't do.

Your Aunt Betty is a prideful woman.

Looking like a kitten cat makes me feel--
it makes me feel silly.

Lyle, the machine
is making me look

like I have a kitten cat in my face,
and it's a eulogy for a fish!

It's very insensitive!

J-Just try to go up to "Tools."

Okay, say that again.
What kind of tools do I need?

No, no, you don't need any tools.

There should be a thing
up top that says "Tools."

Okay, quit your yelling!

-I'm not yelling.
-Again with the yelling!

-Betty, this is John.
-Aunt Betty: Lyle!

Why don't you just mute yourself
so we can continue on.

-Oh, all right.
-John: Thank you.

-All right.
-John: Anyway, uh,

when Jake brought Edgar
into our home...

-(surf rock music playing)
-...we decided that--

Aunt Betty, I think
instead of muting yourself,

you might have put on
some extremely annoying music!

I-I'm sorry about this.

Let me see if I can get
some better reception

in the kitchen.

This has nothing to do with reception!

There's a button on the top
right corner that says "mute."

Just press it!

Okay. I think I got it!

Uh, Edgar was one of
the most wonderful goldfish

that we ever had in our lives!

-Lily: Aunt Betty...
-We all--

...you've accidentally
shared your screen.

Aunt Betty: Who--
who shared a what now?

Aunt Betty, we can see
what you're typing!

Betty, this is John asking you
to please sign off.

We can see you just typed
"farting too much

after soup, question mark."

Lyle, the computer's telling
them all lies about me!

And who mentioned the soup?

All right, everyone, I'm sending
a link to a new room.

Hello? Where did everybody go?

Hello?

We got a lot more funny stuff
for you guys after the break.

-Yes, we do. Yes, we do.
-What are you guys doing?

Scatter!

(clattering)

We'll be right back.

Hey, kiddo, why don't you
put that tablet down

and let's play a fun new game!

Cool, Dad!

Announcer:
Kids all around the country

are excited about
Don't Let Out the Fire Locusts!,

the brand-new game
from Giggle Gulch!

(laughter)

This is fun.

Announcer: Take turns with your
friends hitting the buzzy buttons!

(buzzing)

Announcer:
But be careful not to hit it

too many times because...

♪ Don't let out the fire locusts ♪

♪ Press the buttons and just focus ♪

Announcer: Each game of
Don't Let Out The Fire Locusts

is powered by a cursed artifact.

Say that again.

Announcer:
I said a cursed artifact

found inside the ruins
of an ancient tomb.

First, load your cursed artifact
into the game.

Wow! It's so hot to the touch!

Announcer:
Then chant in a forgotten tongue

that's been unheard by human ears
for the last four millennia.

(speaking ancient language)

(powerful rumble)

-It's working.
-(buzzing)

-♪ Don't let out the fire locusts! ♪
-What's going on?

-(buzzing)
-(screaming)

(singing continues)

Use my body as host?

(screaming)

Announcer:
Don't Let Out the Fire Locusts!

Help! Help me!

Warning: Some archaeologists believe
Don't Let Out the Fire Locusts!

may open a trans-dimensional
portal to the under realm.

Shh!

I finally got my brothers to sleep
so I can sing you my song.

(clears throat)

You go ahead, bro!
We'll play backup!

You-- you don't even
know the song!

♪ Hey, we're Tobie's brothers ♪

♪ And we're comin' your way ♪

You know what, we'll come
back to my song later!

♪ Tobie's brothers and we like to play ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah ♪

-♪ We're all super talented ♪
-♪ Talented ♪

Stop singing.

-Whoo!
-Whoo-hoo!

Hey. How are you? How you doing?

I'm Kleepwrak.

You know... the monster.

Watch your step.

Watch out for that, man. People
supposed to clean up after their dog.

Before a big night of scaring,

I like to start each day off
with a nice warm cup of roaches.

I even joke to my friends,

"Don't talk to me
before I have my roaches!"

(chuckles)
Fun little joke we make.

(slurping)

Mmm!

So, for the last few months, I've been
working Jimmy Taylor's house.

He is nine years old.

-He lives in Grand Rapids.
-(phone ringing)

And-- Oh! My rideshare's here.

Hey, how are you?
This for Kleepwrak?

-(driver muttering)
-Sorry. My mask.

This for Kleepwrak?
Kleepwrak Monster?

-Driver: No, it's for Kendall.
-No?

Kendall?

Wasn't us.

So... Jimmy's at school

and his parents are at work,
so this is usually when I get situated.

I know where they hide the key.

A lot of monsters
like to scare from the closet,

but I prefer going under the bed.

Okay, now we're in a good position

for a solid scare.

Jimmy's bedtime is : p.m.

It is...

:.

Now we wait.

-And then I do that...
-(man talking indistinctly on cell phone)

...and then grab the hair,
grab the hair,

(tapping rhythmically)

You know, it's...
it's mostly a lot of waiting.

But when you see the terror
in these kids' eyes,

makes it all worth it.

(snoring)

♪ Kleepwrak the monster's
a very scary beast ♪ (snarls)

♪ When you least expect it
he will grab your little feet ♪

(growls)

Just a little tune I've been working on.

-(snoring)
-(vacuum whirring)

Aah!

Ohh! It's that vacuum robot.

(door opens)

(whispers) They're home!

Woman: Hey, hey, hey,
Jimmy, no running!

-No running!
-(scampering footsteps)

(TV playing indistinctly)

(whispering)
I think they're watching TV.

-(cat purring)
-Stop!

Pickles, stop. Stop, Pickles!

Hey, stop it. Stop it! Stop it!

Stupid cat!

(hissing)

Get outta here, Pickles!

Stop it! Shh!

(snarling)

Woman: Okay, Jimmy!
Time to go to bed!

This is it! Showtime!

This is when all
the hard work pays off.

Jimmy: Mom! Can I sleep
in your room tonight?

Woman: Uh...

Sure. But just for tonight.

-Jimmy: Yes!
-No!

(footsteps fading)

Are they still gonna air this?

Cameraman: No.

Do I still get paid for this?

Cameraman: No.

Hey, guys, it's really late,
and I've locked myself in the closet.

I'm finally gonna sing my song now.

♪ We're-- ♪

Man: Sorry, Tobie, we're out of time.

I guess my song will have to wait
because that's our show!

Hope you guys had
as much fun watching

as we had making it.

Bye, everybody! Happy Halloween!

-Ooh!
-Happy Halloween! Goodnight.

Happy Halloween, everybody!
And goodnight.

Aunt Betty: Hello? Hello?

Aunt Betty, we're trying
to end the show.

Aunt Betty:
Hello, is anyone there?

Goodnight and Happy Halloween!

Lyle, if you eat all
the Halloween candy again,

you go to the store--

-Just say bye-bye.
-Happy Halloween

-and goodnight! (kisses)
-(Aunt Betty continues, indistinct)

Bye-bye. Say bye-bye.

Nothing for the children!

-Happy Halloween and goodnight.
-Aunt Betty: Hello!

Happy Halloween!
Goodnight, everybody.

I had two pieces.

Happy Halloween and goodnight.

-Goodnight. Goodnight.
-Aunt Betty: Lyle!

-Happy Halloween!
-Aunt Betty: Hello?

I am here yelling!

There is no one here.

This is-- Ugh!

Hello?

Is anyone there?

Put the candy down.

♪ Don't let out the fire locusts ♪

♪ Press the buttons and just focus ♪

♪ Play it with your friends ♪

♪ The good times never end ♪

♪ Now you've opened up the portal ♪

♪ You've done it now,
you foolish mortal ♪

♪ They like to sting,
they feed off fear ♪

♪ They'll use your body as host ♪

♪ For a thousand years ♪