11x07 - Hic or Treat/Mr. Alwaysright

[bunniefuu]

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♪ Every day, when you're
walking down the street ♪

♪ Everybody that you meet
has an original point of view ♪

(laughing)

♪ And I say, hey ♪
Hey!

♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

♪ If we could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

♪ You got to listen to
your heart, listen to the beat ♪

♪ Listen to the rhythm,
the rhythm of the street ♪

♪ Open up your eyes,
open up your ears ♪

♪ Get together and make things
better by working together ♪

♪ It's a simple message,
and it comes from the heart ♪

♪ Oh, believe in yourself ♪
♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ For that's the place
to start ♪
♪ Place to start ♪

♪ And I say, hey ♪
Hey!

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

♪ If we could learn to work
and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind
of day. ♪

Hey!

ARTHUR (over TV):
Hey, D.W.!

Hey!

Whoa!
(loud thud)

(letters shattering)

What are you doing?

(hiccups)

Besides messing
up your room.

None of your business.

(hiccups)

And stop hiccuping, okay?

You're driving me nuts!

(hiccups)

You know how
some kids dress up

as kitty cats and fairies
on Halloween?

Well, that's not what
Halloween's about.

I'll show you what I mean.

(doorbell rings)

ALL:
Twick or tweat!

Oh, look. You are so cute!

ARTHUR:
Wrong!

See, on Halloween,

you're supposed to look
like monsters.

You're supposed to scare people.

Try again.

(doorbell rings)

Twick or tweat?

There you go.

Much better.

Scaring people on Halloween

is an important tradition.

Plus, it's fun.

Watch this.

Wa-ha-ha-ha!

(laughing)

Is that your idea of scary?

What's on your face?

Underpants?
(hiccups)

Arthur?

Shh.

Check this out.

I'm going as Frankentist--

half Frankenstein, half dentist.

Scary, huh?

Not really.

I'm going to be
a prom queen.

What's scary about that?

Trust me. Me as a prom queen

will be scary.

That's not half as scary
as Candy Boy.

"Candy boy"?

He's a boy

who never
gets candy.

It makes him
really mad.

So what's your
costume, Brain?

I'm going as
the th century.

This is the castle

and these are the serfs
and here's a village

where false beliefs
are taking hold.

The th century!

Don't you get it?

No hygiene, no moveable type,

no science.

ARTHUR:
Guess who's going to have

the scariest costume this year.

Me.

Nuh-uh, Arthur.

(hiccups)

I'm going to be way
scarier than...

(hiccups) you.

What could you
possibly think of that's
scarier than Frankentist?

Lots of things.

How about a hairless mouse?

Or a dog that walks
on its hind legs?

Or a roller skate
without shoelaces?

Or I could be
a brown banana.

That's scary. (hiccups)

Mom, can you please make
D.W. stop hiccuping?

She's been doing it
since yesterday.

I can't...
(hiccups) help it.

Did you try holding
your breath, D.W.?

Maybe that will work.

Okay.

(breathes in)

(squeaking
and hissing)

Cut it out.

That's worse
than hiccuping.

Oops.

Sorry.

(hiccups)

What's scarier:
a crown or a tiara?

And why are you
covered in crumbs?

It's all D.W.'s fault.

She's been hiccuping

for two days and it's
driving me crazy.

Well, curing hiccups
is easy.

All you have to do is drink
a glass of water upside down.

You mean you have
to be upside down

when you drink the water,

or you have to
hold the glass

so it's upside
down when you drink?

Beats me.
I've never had the hiccups.

Some scientists believe
that if you scare someone,

you can cause
an esophageal contraction,

and they'll
stop hiccuping.

One plus zero is what?

(hiccups)

Excellent!

Now girls and boys...

let's try something harder,

something that will stretch
your little minds.
Argh!

(hiccups)

Is that your idea of scary?

Ow.

(hiccups)

D.W., isn't there any way

you can stop hiccuping?

Nope.

She's tried everything.

Holding her breath,
drinking water.

I don't know what else to do.

Brain told me to
scare her, but it only
made her hiccups worse.

That's because there's no way
(hiccups) you could scare me.

You're too (hiccups)
Arthury.

Okay, Arthur, if you really
want to scare me... (hiccups)

then here's my list
of things that are scary.

Doob... bny?

Dark Bunny.

I've never (hiccups) seen it,
but I've heard it's scary.

Oc-ps-ss?

Octopuses.

If one fell in my bath,
I don't know what I would do!

This can't be right.

Number three looks
like a cookie.

It is.

(hiccups)
Eating a gingerbread man?

Ew.

How is that scary?

They're creepy.

Those little raisin eyes
and fat legs...

Keep reading.

Un... eye?

(sniffling)
Uni.

(hiccups)
Losing Uni.

No, having to give Uni
to the Tibbles!

That'd be the scariest thing
in the whole wide world!

D.W., why can't you be scared
of normal stuff

like aliens and cobwebs?

All right.

How about we start
with number two?

I'm... (hiccups) ready!

Ready for the octopus.

D.W., it's not scary if you
know an octopus is coming.

You have to be surprised.

Oh.

Okay (hiccups).

♪ La-di-da-di-da... ♪ (hiccups),

♪ I'm just sitting here
in the tub ♪

♪ Not waiting
for an octopus... ♪

It's an octopus!

(yells)

What is this? (hiccups)

It's a balloon
with pipe cleaners.

Well, I didn't have
an actual...

Oh, all right.

Let's try Dark Bunny.

Okay, let's get this show
on the road.

Before we start,
do you need your blankie?

My blankie
bit the dust

a long time ago.

DARK BUNNY:
I tell you, Mary, I have
to change my evil ways.

But how?

It's easy to be good,
Dark Bunny!

Just start by spelling
the word "good." G-O-O-D...

What?!

This can't be right.

"Friday on Dark Bunny:

"Mary Moo Cow

pays the Bad Bunny a visit..."

(both singing):
♪ Being good is
the best time... ♪

No! Turn it off!

D.W.:
Are you sure he won't be mad

that I ate him?

Trust me.

I am , % sure.

Okay (hiccups).

Here goes.

Head, eyes...
not bad (hiccups).

Arms...
um... legs...

um... Arthur!

It's alive!

It's moving inside me!

It's a cookie, D.W.

Sit down.

He's mad!

I can feel it.
He's coming back up...
(burps)

(hiccups)

(sighs)

This is the last scary
thing on your list.

It better work.

This is Uni.

And this is her Clothes-Horse,
Horse-Clothes Barn,

and her schoolhouse and Uni-cyle
and pedal-action convertible,

and don't you dare
even touch her

because as soon as I stop
hiccuping I want her back.

That didn't seem too scary.

It was terrifying.

Poor Uni.

Will I ever get to see
her blue hair again?

Will I ever get to crayon
her face?

Did you hear that?

Hear what?

I'm not hiccuping anymore.

(cheering)

We did it!

Hi, Arthur.
Hi, D.W.

Look! No hiccups.

Good for you.

You know, I was just reading

about the world record holder
for hiccups.

Some guy named
Charles Osborne

had the hiccups
for years.

Can you believe it?

Well, see you.

(hiccups)

Oh, no!

Oh, no!

(crowd applauds and whistles)

TV ANNOUNCER:
We're here waiting
to see if D.W. Read

can set the world record
for hiccups.

(hiccups)

(audience cheering)

Tell me, how
does it feel

to be this close
to making history?

Terrible.

(hiccups)

If you can
continue hiccuping

for another seconds,
then it will be

officially years

since you started.

Which makes you,
uh... let's see, ...

Old.
Right.

Very old.

Let's watch
and see, shall we?

What's wrong?

I can't hiccup anymore.

Now you decide to stop?

It's a bust, folks.
(crowd groans)

Go home.

D.W.:
At least I don't need

a Halloween costume
this year.

(hiccups)

I can just go
as Hiccup Girl.

(hiccups)
That's pretty scary,
I have to admit.

(screeching meow)

Why aren't you wearing
a costume, D.W.?

I am.

I'm Hiccup Girl.

(hiccups):
See?

Don't worry. Your hiccups
won't last forever.

No, just years.

Give or take a few seconds.

I don't look scary at all.

I look weird.

It's not like this is
a competition or anything.

Because if it was,
you'd come in last.

Let's go, okay?

Candy Boy needs some candy.

Buster, are you
sure you can see
out of that mask?

Sure can.

BRAIN:
Ow! Watch it!

BUSTER:
Sorry, Brain.

Oh, wonderful
costumes, everybody!

Hey, what happened
to the lights?

Oops, my broom unplugged
the lamp.

Hold on a sec.
I have a flashlight.

(screams)

Who are you?
What do you want?

Help!

It's me, D.W.!
Can't you tell?

That is the disgustingest
costume I ever saw.

You scared me and I am never
talking to you again.

D.W.:
Arthur, they're gone!

This time the hiccups
are really gone.

You did it!

I did?

You mean, I really am scary?

(doorbell rings)

ALL:
Twick or tweat!

Wow, nice costumes!

Just a moment.

(Arthur roars)

(kids laugh)

(groans)

I knew it was too good
to be true.

(hiccups)

BUSTER:
♪ You're in them ♪

♪ You sh**t them ♪

♪ You make them ♪

♪ It's "Postcards from You" ♪

♪ It's "Postcards from You"... ♪

This "Postcard from You"
was made by kids

at the Harvard Kent School
in Charlestown, Massachusetts.

(moans)

I think I ate too much.

I think I need to lay down.

Help.

I really need help.

My stomach hurts.

(action music plays)

Who are you people?

I'm Captain Nutrition.

And I'm Fitness Queen.

She's been eating
too much junk food.

I found these.

Here, try some of these.

Our next postcard comes
from kids

at the Boys' and Girls' Club
in Lewiston, Idaho.

(rock guitar soloing)

Hey! Two girls.

I found a shell.

There's many types of birds.

There's...
the... chicken, the...

chickadee, the swallow,

the... sparrow.

Golden eagle, bald eagle.

What is that?

It's a feather.

No, it's
a piece of fur.

What do you
think it's from?

It might be a fox
because, um,

I've seen foxes with
that type of hair.

This could be, like,
to a badger or something.

To see more "Postcards from
You," visit pbskidsgo.org.

You're out!

No way. I'm safe.

You're... out!

Told you.

Isn't it annoying when
someone is always right?

(band playing badly)

Francine usually
is about sports.

With Binky, it's music.

(band playing wrong notes)

No, no, no!

You came in too quickly,
you're behind, and you're flat.

Let's try it again

and with some enthusiasm.

(more lively playing)

And Buster?

Buster is almost never wrong
when it comes to candy.

Mmm...
The chocolate is dry

and the nuts are stale.

I'd say this candy bar
was left here...

sometime in December.

Around the th.

Want it?

Eww!

Fortunately, no one is
ever right about everything.

Excuse me, Arthur.

I hate to interrupt,

but that last sentence
was poorly constructed.

What do you mean?

You don't need to use
both "ever" and "always."

It's redundant.

Strike!

That's just
your opinion.

No, it says so right here

in this Skunk and Blight
Manual of English Usage.

Strike two!
Ahem!

Let me read from Chapter .

"When constructing a sentence,

it is best to avoid redundancies
whenever possible."

Pretty annoying,

isn't it?

(crowd yelling)

Arthur gets the mint chip,

and Buster gets the
double-dipped Mocha-lotion

banana-banana-berry-blast-
extra-jimmies-hold-the-cherry.

Ah... the # .

Hey.

You want to see what I got
my mom for her birthday?

(coughs)

What is it?

A hat.

Oh.

I thought
it might be something

from your food collection.

What do you think?

(baby crying)

Um... maybe it'll look
better on your mother.

(door closes)

Uh... It looked okay
in the store,

but now I'm not so sure.

You could probably exchange it.

Will you come with me
after school tomorrow?

There are so many hats to
choose from in that place.

I get overwhelmed.

Sorry. I have to help my dad
clean out the garage.

How 'bout you, Brain?

Want to help me pick out
a new hat for my mom?

Sure. I'll be glad to help.

Hmm.

No.

Hmm.

No. Too flowery.

Aha.

Buster,

it's her birthday.

She's not
graduating college.

Hey,

what about this one?

It has a hole in it.

Maybe something's
supposed to go there

and it just fell off.

No, it's just
a moth hole.

How about those
Tyrolean hats?

Hey.

How about this one?

Pretty snazzy, eh?

I don't think so.

Now this...

This is perfect.

Well, what's wrong
with this one?

There's too much
orange in it.

Here. Take this one.

Trust me.

I think you're wrong.

I think she'll
love this one.

But this one matches her eyes.

Her eyes aren't green.

Yes, they are.

Oh, yeah. They are.

Well, they're
not that shade of green.

I'm buying this one.

Are you sure about this?

Brain, she's
my own mother.

I think I know
what she would like

a little better
than you.

Oh, my.

It's so...

bold.

Do you like it?

I think it's wonderful.

Thank you so
much, sweetie.

Try it on.

It'll be great for a party.

I better take it off
now, though,

so we don't get it dirty.

It's been almost a week,
and she hasn't worn the hat.

I guess
Brain was right.

As usual.

He's even right about things
that aren't his business.

Doesn't it bug
you sometimes?

No.

It bugs me.

Once, just once,
I'd like to see him be wrong.

I'm sure Brain's been wrong
plenty of times.

RATBURN:
"A" again, Alan.

Excellent work.

Oh, yeah?

No one's perfect, Buster.

You're right.

One day, he has to slip up,

and I'm going to be
there when he does.

BRAIN:
Hey, Buster.

What'll it be, a # ?

No, I'm trying something
different today.

One scoop of Mellow Mint,
one of Fudge Fiesta,

pretzel smooshins, coconut
sprinkles, hot fudge,

whipped cream, four cherries and
a teaspoon of rainbow jimmies.

And I'm in a rush.

Here you go.

That's $ . , please.

It's perfect.

You want your change?

You gave me $ . .

Hey, Brain,
how's it going?

Say, do you know what
the capital of Romania is?

Bucharest. Why?

(footsteps running)

How about
Czechoslovakia?

There is no more
Czechoslovakia.

It was split into
the Czech Republic and Slovakia.

Ha! You're wrong!

It's Prague. See?

That's the library's
old atlas.

The new one's
on the podium over there.

Why are you quizzing me?

Quizzing you?

(laughs)
I'm not quizzing you.

Can't a kid just
ask a question?

How about
Bulgaria?

Sofia.

(phone rings)

Alan?

Telephone for you.

BUSTER (with nasal voice):
Good evening, sir.

Um, you have been randomly
selected to win a prize

if you correctly
answer this question:

What is the square
root of , ?

Buster, why are you calling me
at : at night?

Uh... sorry.

Wrong number.

(sighs)

(phone rings)

Hello?

!

Oh!

(yawns)

He'll slip up someday.

I know he will.

OLD BUSTER:
Admit it!

I finally
caught you.

No, you didn't.

You said it was going
to rain today, and look--

not a cloud in the sky.

You were wrong.

I said it looked
like rain.

It was just an opinion,
not a fact.

Well, then,
your opinion was wrong.

(thunder)

♪ These answers he's making,
they're never mistaken ♪

♪ He's Mr. Always Right! ♪

♪ These answers he's making ♪

♪ They're never mistaken ♪

♪ He's Mr. Always Right! ♪

I'll get you yet,
Mr. Always Right!

"If train A leaves the station
at :

"going miles an hour,

"and Train B leaves the station
at :

going miles
an hour..."

I'm not going
to answer you!
Why?

You're afraid
you'll get it wrong, aren't you?

No, I'm just tired
of you pestering me.

Is this all because

you didn't take my advice
about your mom's hat?

Arthur told me she didn't
like that orange thing.

No!

Okay, it is. There.

You're right again.

You're always
right!

(groans)

And I'm always wrong.

Gustave Eiffel designed
many structures,

but he's most famous
for building

which structure?

Yes, Alan?

The pyramids?

N-No.

Not even close.

It's the Eiffel Tower,
of course.

Do you feel
all right, Alan?

Fine.

I guess I just...

made a mistake.

(gasps)
Did you hear that?

Brain said
he made a mistake.

(class whispering)

Okay, let's settle down,
everyone.

He was wrong?

Brain was
really wrong?

(whoops)

Finally!

RATBURN:
And do you know
the correct answer,

Mr. Baxter?

Uh... ?

(girls giggling)

Hey, Brain,

you knew the answer to that
question earlier, didn't you?

If I say yes,
are you going to follow me

until you catch me
making a mistake?

No.

Sorry I've been such a pest.

I was just upset
that I didn't pick
something my mom liked.

I still am.

Maybe she can return it
and get...

That one!

Muffy, where'd you get
that hat?

Oh, this?

Isn't it charmant?

I got it at The
Clothing Exchange.

Buzz had a whole
box of them.

(laughing)

This one has a hole in it.

So does this one.

Wait, they all
have holes in them.

That's because I haven't
sewn these on yet.

The Beetle berets
were discontinued

because this jeweled bug
kept falling out.

But if you use thicker thread,
it works fine.

Like this one.

Buster, I was wrong,

and you were right.

I thought it was a moth hole,
remember?

Who cares?

I'll take it.

ARTHUR:
Isn't it great?

And she was able

to get some gloves for
the other hat we returned.

Here you go.

This one's on the house.

Happy Birthday,
Mrs. Baxter.

Thank you, Alan.

Uh, Brain?

This is a # .

I ordered the # .

Really?

I could have sworn you said...

Oh, well, my mistake.

(chuckles)

Just wanted to hear you say it.

Don't worry, Brain.

You were right.

♪ Every day when you're
walking down the street ♪

♪ And everybody that you meet ♪

♪ Has an original
point of view ♪

♪ And I say, hey ♪
♪ Hey! ♪

♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

♪ If we could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

♪ Hey! ♪
♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

♪ Hey! ♪
♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

♪ Hey! ♪