Christmas Switch, The (2014)

[bunniefuu]

- h* h* h*.

Merry Christmas.

Find the Santa.

Make a fortune.

Who's gonna win some money?

Let's go, let's go.

It's real simple, guys.

All you gotta do is
turn over old Saint Nick

and Christmas comes
three weeks early.

Who wants to go first?

Let's go, step right up.

- Wait a second, I think
I can beat this guy.

- Dad, come on, the shops
are gonna close soon.

- Here we go.

What do you say, kid, huh?

Put your money down right
there under the rock, huh?

Remember, follow the
Santa, follow the Santa.

Here we go.

Keep your eye on the Santa.

One, two, three, here we go.

There they are.

Where's Santa?

Come on, come on, come on.
- I'm pretty sure

it's that one right there.

Yeah.

- Hey, we got a winner, huh?

Pay the kid, what do
you got there, 200?

There we go.

Merry Christmas,
merry Christmas.

- That's the one I would
have picked, watch.

Here we go,
which card is it gonna be?

- That's our Christmas money.

Hey, butt out, kid.

All right, Dad, what's
it gonna be, huh?

Find the Santa, find the Santa.

All right.

Oh, hey, no Santa
this year, huh?

- Hey, you gotta give
me another chance.

That money was for
Christmas presents.

- What do I look
like, a charity, huh?

You want a hand out, head
down the Salvation Army.

Get out of here.

- Not so fast.

- What does the Santa say, huh?

- Hey.

- Hey, take it easy.

Taxi.

- Stop that guy,
he's got my money.

Taxi.

- Now, remember what I told you.

- Sure, Doc.

- Goodbye, Sam.

- Thanks, Doc.

- If you can argue half
as well as your old man,

you'll be on the Supreme
Court in four years.

- Yeah, I just,

he had such shortness of
breath, I got nervous.

- Mm-hmm, well
that's why bed rest

is the best possible thing
Sam can do right now.

You know, your dad has a
heart as big as New York,

but his body is
trying really hard

to put that heart in a box,

so it has to work harder
to get blood to the brain.

- Thank you.

- And lock him in
there if you have to.

- Oh right, that's
easier said than done.

You know my father.

This is his favorite
time of year.

- Yeah, that's
what I'm afraid of.

Bed rest, Sam.

I've gotta run.

- Yeah.

- And walk me to the entrance.

- Merry Christmas.

Better not cry.

Better not shout.

Where is it?

Ah-ha, there.

Yeah.

Ooh.

- Dad?

You okay?

You never do tidy up
after yourself, do you?

Sam?

Sam, are you really sleeping?

I guess you are.

Guess that means you won't mind

if I throw out this
old Santa outfit

since you won't be
needing it this Christmas.

- Oh, honey, wait, what?

What's going on?

- You know what's going on.

There is no Santa
Clause this year.

The doctor gave you strict
orders to stay inside

and get rest and that's
exactly what you're gonna do.

- It's just one man's opinion.

- Here, Dad, take your medicine.

No, don't
worry, it'll pass.

- No, Dad.

Here.

You have got to learn to
start taking care of yourself.

- Sue, Sue, would you
stop with that already?

You're making me dizzy,
running around here.

- Well, I guess I inherited your

gene for hard work, didn't I?

- But you know, hard work
is not everything if...

- Oh, Dad, please, no
speeches right now.

You know I'm
studying for the bar.

You know I'm just trying
to prioritize, okay?

Work first, play later, that's
the way I've always been.

- Sweetheart,
you're doing great.

Really.

You always have.

Now, seeing as you're standing,

would you mind just
bringing me that Santa suit?

- Okay, I get it.

- No, no.
- Okay.

- I just wanna
show you something.

Please.

Please.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Now, did
you ever look closely

at an old Santa's outfit?

No, I
can't say I have.

Well,
you can discover

some interesting things like

there it is, see?

Your mother patched
that about 15 years ago.

She was always good
with a needle and thread.

- I insisted on
keeping the old outfit

and she insisted that the kids

weren't gonna see an
old tattered Santa.

You know what she said?

"Mrs. Clause would
be very angry."

Now, I remember one winter.

It was so cold that
before I got to the store,

this beard had
just frozen solid.

Did I ever tell you a time
that I'd lost a beard?

Now, that...

When, when?

That was...

- Dad.

Hey.

Get some rest, okay?

- Okay.

- There you go.

- Thanks, honey.

I'll put this
back right over here.

- h* h* h*, merry Christmas.

So, young dude, what do you want

Santa here to enact
for you for Christmas?

- You're not Santa.

- You're insane, dude.

I'm the most genuine Santa
you're ever gonna experience.

Don't go starting any false
rumors about who I'm not.

Gonna ask you one more time.

What do you want for Christmas?

- Santa Clause doesn't
talk to children that way.

- Is there any problem?

Yeah,
your Santa here.

- Jeez, you're so sensitive.

- Look, if you can't get a real
Santa to play Santa Clause,

I'm gonna do my shopping
on the internet.

I mean, what
happened to the nice

Santa that you had last year?

- Hey, hey, I'm nice.

- Well, you see, Sam was
getting a little old,

so we thought young Liam
here would be good for kids.

- I'm out of here.

Later, dudes.

- Looks like you'd
better get Sam back here.

- Wait.

We have specials.

Mechanical toys.

- Mr. Oakville, this is
the 21st century Santa.

Now, don't be concerned
that it's not human

because this baby will
outsell any Santa before it.

Okay.

How does it work?

- Ah, that's the beauty of it.

You see, a child
sits on Santa's lap.

We strategically place the
father and mother over here.

Now, as the child tells Santa
what they want for Christmas,

a video plays,
demonstrating the toy.

Both parents and
child are impressed.

A quick motion from Santa.

He takes their credit
cards, cash, or checks.

Also, gives them their delivery
dates and pickup dates,

but most of all and what
really makes this work

is that now, every child is on
Santa's private mailing list,

which means that for
the next 364 days,

we are gonna hit them with every

piece of junk mail we can find.

Now, there's a merry
merry Christmas.

- You're a genius.

That's genius.

Barbara, you gotta see this.

We are going to have
fully exclusive rights

to an automated Santa.

- George, we need to talk.

h* h* h*.

Hey, Eddie,
where you been?

- Forget about it, I just had to

ditch those two cops, right?

- Oh man, that was close,
but it was worth every penny.

Look at that, baby.

I got us the big
box of wine today.

- All right.
- Yo, Eddie.

I heard you pulled that
reindeer scam again.

- Oh yeah, Rudolph the
Red-Nosed Reindeer, baby.

Works every time.

So Mister
Three Card Money,

when you gonna let
us in on this thing?

Or is it always gonna
be some big secret?

- I don't know, reindeer trick,
it takes a lot of practice.

- Practice?

Yeah, especially when you
pull it on little kids.

You got no heart, man.

- You know what, I'm gonna
show you this trick one time

just 'cause we're good friends.

- Oh yeah?

That's all it should

take for you to
figure it out, right?

- Sure.
- One time?

- Yeah.
- All right.

Let's see it.

- All right, big guy.
- Yeah, go 'head.

Let's see it.
- Smart guy.

All right.

- Man, is he fast.

- What do you think?

Tell me where it's at.

- That one right there.

Damn.

Which one is he under anyway?

- Hey, that's my
secret, my secret.

- I know you palm
that Santa, Eddie

and I'm gonna figure it out too.

- Well, it could
be or maybe people

just can't find Santa anymore.

Ooh.

- What's missing here, George?

Shoppers, George.

Scared away by punk Santa
and off buying online

because we can't give
them the one thing

that they've been coming to
Toy Town for for 50 years.

What is that?

- Christmas?

- Sam, George.

Santa Sam.

- Okay, but I thought that
if we got a young, hip Santa,

the kids would relate to that.

- The parents want a Santa.

An old-bearded Santa.

- Yes, but a young Santa would...

- George.

After your father passed and
you approached my hedge fund

for financing to
keep this archaic

marketing concept
called a store going,

I wanted no part of it,

but my partners
convinced me that this

small vintage boutique Toy Town

with a celebrity icon could be

successfully franchised, George.

Think Colonel...

- Chicken.

- Colonel Chicken, yes,

and that we could
challenge the internet

and the big box stores, right?

Now, we have a huge amount
of capital tied up here

and our Colonel Chicken,
which is Sam, has gone AWOL.

- Well, Sam is very sick.

- Just do whatever it takes
to get him back in that chair.

- I don't see what I can do.

- Incentivize him.

Beg, lie, tie him
up, I don't care,

but I want Santa Sam back in
that chair by noon tomorrow

or you and I are
going to have a very

punk Christmas in
hell, understand?

- Yeah.

- Good.

George, do it now.

- He's been at it for,
like, three hours.

He's
never gonna get it.

Okay, find the
Santa, find the Santa.

- I picked the Santa,
I picked the Santa.

- Give it back.

You got lucky.

Think you're so smart,
try it yourself.

How's it
going over there?

It's going
just great, thanks.

Hiding the Santa?

Yeah.

- You're right, he's
never gonna get it.

Not unless you work with him.

Why won't you show us
the reindeer scam, Eddie?

I don't understand.

- Just protecting my interest.

Trick can be dangerous
in the wrong hands.

- You know, some people
might call that greedy.

- Maybe, but when
I decide to quit,

I'm gonna retire
that trick for good.

- Quit?

What, are you gonna
skip out on me now?

Yeah,

but not before we make our
first million, baby.

Okay,
Rudolph, here's to you.

- h* h* h*.

Yes.

- Yes?

Hello?

- Hi, Susan.

I'm Barbara Morgan

and this is George Oakville.

We're from Toy Town.

We'd like to see your father.

- Well, I'm sorry,
he's sleeping.

- Okay.

Let's just get to the point.

We are prepared to not
only triple his salary,

but we understand that
you're a law student

and we are prepared to offer
you some financial compensation

to pay for some expenses to
start you off in your career.

- All right now, sweetheart.

Take your time.

Remember how much it means to me

to be able to see
those kids again.

The answer's no.

- You don't even want
to think it over.

- My father is very ill.

He can't have any unnecessary
stress in his life right now.

Doctor's orders.

- Susan, we're not asking
him to work a 12 hour day.

Just a couple of
hours here and there

to show the parents that their

good old Santa is back in town.

- We'll have a backup Santa
and doctor standing by 24/7.

- Mr. Oakville, my father's
health is not for sale.

- Maybe we should
let Sam decide that.

We'd like to see him.

- Yeah.

- Please leave

and by the way, if you do manage

to get in touch with my father

and somehow convince
him to return,

I will let every media
outlet in the city know

that Toy Town went
out of its way

to jeopardize the health
of a very sick old man

just to increase
its bottom line.

Are we clear?

- You're gonna make
a great lawyer.

You have what it takes.

- And give Sam my best.

- George.
- Yep.

- So that's it.

Well.

I gave it my best shot.

So this is really it, huh?

I guess it had to
come sooner or later.

I was just hoping
it'd be, you know,

a lot later than sooner,

but I mean, I'm not
complaining, you understand.

It's just that, well, it
seems like such a shame

to put this away, you know?

I had the lining redone.

There's a new collar on it.

Even had it dry-cleaned.

Okay, okay.

You can't blame me
for trying, huh?

I just thought that
if there was anyone

who could get this
rickety old body

to play Santa one
more time, it's you.

I mean, what would it hurt?

I've done it for almost 50 years

and I have never
missed one Christmas,

no matter how much
snow or rain or sleet.

I,

I mean I'm a regular postman
for the North Pole mail,

so what do you say?

From one old Santa
to another, huh?

Let me play Santa
Clause one more time.

Let me just make a difference
in a few kid's lives.

Even just one kid.

Please.

- I'm telling you,
you don't have to

run a scam to make money
this time of year, okay?

It's Christmas time.

All you need to do
is a little h* h* h*

and money practically falls
out of people's wallets.

- h* h* h*?

- Yeah.

h* h* h*.

- h* h* h*.

- That's it, h* h* h*.

- h* h* h*.

h* h* h*.

- h* h* h*.

h* h* h*.

Who the hell are you?

- Mind if I warm up a little?

It's cold in here.

Preparing for Christmas?

- What's it to you,
you some kind of cop?

- Mind if I have a
word with you, Eddie?

- How do you know my name?

- I knew he had another partner.

- I think we should
talk in private.

- Watch my g*n.

I'm cool.

Al put you up to this?

No.

Let's just say I've been
watching you for a long time.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

You're very good at what you do.

- Yeah, pretty well known.

- It's not a compliment.

The problem is you're too good.

You've dug yourself
into a deep hole, Eddie,

and that reindeer scam is
not gonna get you out of it.

- How do you know about...

You're a cop.

Listen, I'm not talking to anybody
till I talk to my lawyer.

- I'm not here to hurt you.

I'm here to help you.

- Okay, you can start
by letting go of my arm.

- Sorry.

I'm here to make
you a proposition,

a gamble, if you like.

I'm willing to offer redemption
in exchange for a favor.

- A favor?

- All you have to do is loan
your body for three weeks

to an old man whose
only wish is to

play Santa Clause one last time.

- Loan my body?

What are you, some
kind of grave digger?

- Eddie, this man is not
strong enough to play Santa.

He'll die if he does,

which is why we need
your body for a while.

Look at what we're
offering in exchange.

Redemption.

You know, I might consider
it if you made it $1,000,000.

It can be arranged.

- You can do that?

Three weeks
and it's yours.

Is that worth the gamble?

- Hey, Manny.

Get over here.

I think we got
our million bucks.

The old man right...

Hey, buddy, where'd you go?

- Hey, you sure you don't
know this guy, Eddie?

- Yeah, I swear to you.

I'd never seen him
before in my life.

- Okay, sure.

h* h* h*.

Merry Christmas.

What would you like
from Santa this year?

Water baby.

I want a mermaid water baby,

ballerina water baby,

fabulous water baby,

cheerleader water baby.

h* h* h*.

Merry Christmas.

What would you like
from Santa this year?

- I told you, water baby.

h* h* h*.

Merry Christmas.

What would you like
from Santa this year?

h* h* h*.

Merry Christmas.

What would you like
from Santa this year?

h* h* h*.

Merry Christmas.

What would you like
from Santa this year?

Merry Christmas.

- George.

- Yeah, baby.

Gettin' beat.

I'll use it.

Eddie, put that down.

- Look, I'm not kiddin', okay?

I've been thinking about
you and you want my body.

You know, you're probably part

of some witch cult or
something like that.

- Just the opposite.

- Yeah, I'm warning you.

Ow, ow.

How'd you do that, you some
kind of magician or something?

- Don't be scared, Eddie.

I just wanna know if you're
going to take my deal.

- Really?

You're serious about
this, aren't ya?

- Oh yes, yes we are.

However, as your advisor,

I'd have rather you'd
chosen redemption,

but then what can I do?

I'm only an advisor.

You have free will, Eddie.

You have to make
the final choice.

- But why me?

- Well, it's simple.

Everyone has a
chance at eternity,

no matter how good or
despicable they've been.

Christmas is just
a reminder that

that chance is always there.

That's how he works.

Oh.

You know what, you almost had me

with this magician stuff
and the money that I want.

How'd you do that?

- Sam.

Sam.

- What?

- We're here to grant your wish.

- Wait a second.

You know what, this whole body
switching thing, you're nuts.

You know what, I wanna
see $1,000,000 right now.

Hey.

- These are the terms
to be agreed upon.

You, Eddie Bennett, will give

your body to Sam
Wells for three weeks.

During that time, you
will occupy his body

and do your best to
maintain his health.

At exactly 12:00
midnight Christmas Eve,

we will return you to your body

and the sum of
$1,000,000 will be yours.

Is that clear?

Yeah.

- Eddie, you have
one more chance.

You could choose redemption.

- I'll take the million dollars.

Ready?

- Ready.

Hey, take care of
this body, huh?

It's the only one I got.

- Don't worry, son.

- Listen up, people.

We're only able to
accept applicants

with at least several
years Santa experience.

That means able to sit at
least one child on each leg

and no matter what, no tattoos.

- Woah.

Ooh.

Oh.

So this is what it feels like
to be an old geezer, huh?

Boy.

Oh, do you look rough.

No wonder you wanted
Eddie.

God.

Skin feels like sandpaper.

Never mind.

Just think about
the million dollars.

That's what's important.

The million dollars.

Still there.

Where, where am I?

Huh.

Manny.

Sit.

I gotta call Manny.

Yeah.

- Yes, yes, yes, baby.

Yes, I told you.

Come on, give me that.

All of it?

- All of it.

Hello?

- Manny, it's Eddie.

- No, Eddie's not here.

- No, Manny, I am Eddie, okay?

This is Eddie.

- Eddie, you sound terrible.

You got a cold or something
or is it this phone?

Yeah, sort of.

- Eddie, I think you'd better
take care of that thing.

- Yeah, I know, I know.

Listen, Manny, I
need you to come here

as quickly as possible.

Don't ask why.

Let's see.

Oh, this is so lame.

This guy's blind too.

Let me, hold on.

Yeah.

The address.

Hey, write this down.

- 45 West 75th Street.

- Apartment 134.

- Manny, listen.

We play our cards right here,

we are getting away
with $1,000,000.

You got that?

Dad?

Dad?

- A daughter.

Manny, I gotta go right now,

but get here as
soon as possible.

I got a surprise for you.

Dad, you okay?

Yeah, yeah,
I'm just resting.

- Let's let a little
light in here, huh?

- Wow.

So you're the daughter.

- And you're the
father, remember?

Yeah, right.

I'm just kidding.

- Listen, Dad, I've
only got a few minutes.

I'm meeting my bar partner
back at the library.

- Really, you can drink
at the library now?

- Dad, are you sure you're okay?

- Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.

- I'm a little
worried about you.

- No, no.

You go off to the bar.

I'll be fine.

- Okay.

I'll be back by seven.

You know how to reach me, right?

- Yeah.

Remember, my
new cell phone number?

I left it written down
for you last week?

- Oh.

- Here, give it
to you again here.

You can call me on that
and if I'm in the library,

I'll call you back
in a minute, okay?

Next.

Name.

- Sam, Eddie Bennett.

- No, no, you're way too young.

- Yes, but I wanna be young.

- Yes, we all wanna be
young, but not Santa.

Santa's old and fat and
jolly and you're not it.

Thank you.

Try again in another
10, 15 years.

- Yes, but I only have...

Will you
show him out please?

Thank you.

- Well, Santa, they're just
gonna have to see you in action.

Home sweet home.

- Nobody's right, nobody.

Aren't there any
good Santas left?

- Barbara, we have
to hire someone.

- Yes, I know we
have to hire someone,

but first, we have to
do some damage control.

We messed up, we completely
damaged Santa's image

and I think that this
store has an obligation

to restore that image
to our customers.

The next person that
we pick for Santa

has to be absolutely perfect.

Must epitomize the very
meaning of Christmas and then...

- They'll buy our toys.

- Exactly.

What the hell do you
think Christmas is about?

Don't answer that.

Don't you have something to do?

Quietly.

Well, merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

h* h* h* h*.

Who's next, come on up and tell

Santa what you
want for Christmas?

- I'd rather stand, thank you.

- Okay.

- My size and color
selection are included

as well as quantity.

These are all for you?

- She's very competitive.

- You know, sometimes, quality
is better than quantity.

- Why?

Isn't it better to
have more than less?

That's what Daddy says.

The more money you
make, the more you have.

The more you have,
the happier you are

and I wanna be very happy
for Christmas, Santa.

Well, we all do,

but if you want Santa's help,

you'll have to sit up here
as I tell you a story.

Okay, fair trade.

- You know, when I first
started delivering presents,

I would get letters from many
children all around the world

asking for their favorite toy

and some would ask for two.

Some would ask for three

and some would even
ask for hundreds.

Now, what's a Santa to do?

If I were to deliver hundreds
of toys to one child,

then another child
would have nothing.

- Nothing?

Nothing.

- Couldn't you hire more
elves and make more toys?

- Well, you see that's the
problem with Christmas.

There's only so many
elves to make so many toys

and we all want to be
happy for Christmas, right?

- This is definitely a problem.

Maybe we should each
take a little less

so we can all have
more for Christmas.

- Well, that sounds
like a grand idea.

- You can keep my list.

It might help you pick toys
for the other children.

- That makes Santa very happy.

- 'Kay, Mommy, we're finished.

- Thank you.

Thank you very much.

- Merry Christmas.

h* h* h* h* h*, merry Christmas.

- George, I don't know what
to do about this Santa.

I can't find anyone to play him.

- I don't know what
you're talking about.

I think he's doing fine.

Who?

- Santa.

He's great, kids love him.

That's
not our Santa.

- Then who's is he?

- Come on, George.

- But I've been watching
him for an hour.

- Call security.

I'm gonna put a stop to this.

- Look, there's a
big line for him.

That's because
their Santa hungry, that's all.

- Merry Christmas.

George Oakville.

- Yes.
- Hi.

My mother used to bring
me here as a child.

- Oh, fantastic.

- I want to thank you.

- You do?

- Yes, that Santa is incredible.

He was willing to
lose sales just

to teach my daughter
the meaning of Christmas

and that means I'm
gonna be shopping

here for a long, long time.

- Merry Christmas.
- Me too.

- Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

Come on, come on.

And what is it you'd like
for Christmas this year?

- Manny.

- Oh, excuse me, I'm
looking for Eddie Bennett.

Yeah,
that's me, Manny.

I'm Eddie.

- No, no, I'm looking
for Eddie Bennett.

He's 35, really
good with the cards.

- Yeah, yeah, that's me.

Come on, get in here.

- Yeah, listen, old man.

Maybe with the senile thing
you think you're Eddie,

but you're not, so
how do you know him?

- Manny, look.

It's me.

I'm just in a different
body, that's all.

I know it's hard to believe,

but I am in here really.

I'll prove it to you.

I was born May 15, 1979, okay?

My neighborhood 96 to 100
Street, Columbus Avenue, PS 68.

I was kicked out in grade 10

and my father left
when I was seven.

My mother, you know, just left

and I learned card tricks
from the best in the business.

There's no one as good as me.

You ask anyone on the
street, they'll tell ya.

- What's your best scam?

- You know, the reindeer scam.

No one can do that but me.

- Yep, that's true.

So if you are really Eddie,

show me the Rudolph trick.

I don't know
whether I could do that.

I'm in a different body now

and these hands
aren't as nimble.

Besides, I didn't
bring any cards along.

I left them in my pant's pocket,

so the other guy took 'em.

- I always carry any
extra set, partner.

Haven't you forgotten something?

- Okay.

h* h* h*, merry Christmas.

Find the Santa
and win a fortune.

Merry Christmas, you satisfied?

Aw.

- Oh, oh hey, hey, hey.

Enough, enough.

I don't know what
your game is, okay?

But where's Eddie?

Hey, Eddie.

Come on out, buddy.

Hey.

Manny, come on.

I am Eddie.

But you can't
do the reindeer trick.

- Yes, I can, but I
need Eddie's body.

But it's just that there's two
Eddies, don't you understand?

There's me, Eddie, and
then there's Eddie's body,

like we're separate, but you
know, we're the same thing,

but I, I can't do
the tricks as Eddie

unless I've got
Eddie's body, right?

- Uh, I guess not,

but still, you can't do
the trick and that's Eddie.

I mean, I don't know
about your body or mind

or whatever you're
talking about,

but Eddie is that trick,

so I'll be seeing you, old man.

- Hey, bro.

Find the Santa.

Come on.

Ah-ah.

Eddie.

It really is you.

Buddy.

You look terrible.

- Thanks.

- I hope I didn't
offend you before.

I mean, what's a couple
of years amongst Santas?

- No, not at all.

I can understand your reaction.

And
so reasonable too.

- Yes, very reasonable.

- So let's get down to it.

As you can see, we are
prepared to offer you

a very generous
salary and of course,

we pay double and
triple for overtime.

- Oh, I don't want a salary.

No salary?

- I get it.

You want a percentage
of the gross.

- No, no salary, no
percentage of anything.

I just, I wanna play
Santa until Christmas

and I hope that Toy Town
would make a donation

to a couple of
charities, my choice.

That would be sufficient.

- Mm-hmm.

Tax write-off.

Well, we don't see
a problem at all.

- No, none at all.

In fact, let me be the first to

welcome you to our little family

and in the parlance of
our times, go get 'em.

- Thank you, Mr.
Oakville, Ms. Morgan

and merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas.

- Yeah, merry Christmas.

There is a Santa.

- Yes.

Yes, there is and a good one.

- Oh man.

I can't explain what this
being old feels like.

I'm me, but I'm not me.

- Yeah, I know that feeling.

Believes me, runs in my family.

Eddie, you gotta take
care of yourself.

You're older now.

- Hey, don't be a smart a*s.

I'm still 35, I'm
still Eddie, okay?

Anyway, we got other problems.

I don't trust these guys,
especially the old man.

Once he gets a taste of youth,

he may not wanna
give my body back.

Oh yeah.

Hey, you got a point.

- Damn right.

I need you to keep
one eye on him

so he doesn't run
away with me, got it?

- Yeah, I got it.

I'm gonna check out Toy Town.

Hang on a second, how
do I recognize this guy?

- It's easy, he
looks just like me.

The real Eddie.

Hey.

I need to get some fresh air.

Come on.

Help me down the stairs.

Here we go.

Yeah.

- Here we go.

Got your favorite.

Cabbage soup.

Oh, just my luck.

- What?

- Uh, can't wait.

Cabbage soup
is good for you, Dad.

- Yeah, okay.

Uh-huh.

Absolutely wonderful.

What's all this?

- Huh?

Oh, I missed.

- Yeah, more than
once it looks like.

Wait a second, did you
take your medicine today?

- Yeah, I think so.

What are you so worried about?

- You went out today?

- So?

- So you promised you
wouldn't go out alone, Dad.

- What are you, the
nurse from hell?

- How can I trust you now?

I can't leave you alone.

- What do you mean?

You gotta leave me alone.

You can't, no, I mean,
you can leave me alone

because I'll stay
right in this bed

and take all my
medicines, promise.

- And how many times have
you promised that before?

- Never.

Well, I mean, those
promises, they weren't

real promises, but this
time, this is a real promise.

I'm going to do
everything you say.

- You'll take all your medicine.

- Sure.

Starting tonight.

- Yeah.

- Okay.

Then I guess we'll start
with the home remedy.

Open up.

Hey, Manny,
where you been?

Christmas shopping.

Who's money?

Very funny.

- You see Eddie?

- Partly.

Louie and I did.

You did?

Where?

I thought
you didn't know.

Eddie's always been
getting over on us.

Now he's getting
over on you too.

Pulling an inside job.

- What?

- Playing Santa at Toy Town.

The toy store?

- Actually pretty smart
when you think about it.

The cops are on the outside
looking for him on the streets

and he's on the inside
and they're lining up

and he's making money.

I don't know how, but he is.

Give me three.

Thing about it is, this time,

he ain't gonna forget
about his partners.

You know why?

'Cause this time we
know where Santa is.

- h* h* h*.

Bam.

Okay.

- Wow, that was something.

One last thing.

Oh, of course.

- Here you go.

Good.

Now I don't have to
worry about you tonight.

- Oh, I'm fine.

Listen, why don't you
go out or something?

- Or something?

I think we know how the
last or something ended up.

How's that?

- Mr. Right on paper, Mr.
Wrong in every other way?

Yeah, yeah.

- You know what'd be
nice before I go back

and study in my little
shoe box apartment?

What's that?

- Why don't we read a little
poetry like the good old days?

- Poetry?

I'm not sure I could
take the excitement.

- Hey, you wrote the stuff.

Do you remember this one?

Skates on Ice?

You wrote that when I lost
that skating competition.

- You lost?

- Oh, come on.

I fell so hard that day.

You must
have had a sore booty.

- Not as sore as my pride,
I can tell you that.

I never told you this, but
one of the times that I fell,

I was just gonna lay there.

I was gonna get all dramatic

and pretend that I broke
my leg or something

and I remember looking up
and seeing you in the stands

doing one of these

and I knew right then and there

that I didn't have
to be embarrassed.

I didn't have to feel
sorry for myself,

that I just, just
had to get back up.

- Yeah, sure, and you
finished real strong.

- What are you talking about?

I fell eight more times.

Oh yeah.

Well...

- But the point is,
you always made me feel

that if I made a mistake,
if I did something wrong,

that I could just get back up.

That meant a lot to me.

- I don't know what to say.

You're welcome.

- Where were we?

- No, no, no, I get the point.

Look, why don't you
go off and study?

You sure?

- Sure.

I got some reading
to do of my own.

Catch up on what I wrote, huh?

All right, well,
don't forget your glasses.

- Woo.

Hey.

You really love me, don't you?

- Yeah.

You're my dad.

- Oh yeah.

Yeah, I'm your father.

- 'Scuse me.

Sorry, I got to talk
to Santa over here.

Sorry.

- Well, I hope you have a
wonderful, wonderful Christmas.

- Ooh, this is a miracle.

- Merry Christmas to you.

Okay, who's next?

Come on, don't be shy.

- I mean, I couldn't believe it.

There you are.

I mean, there's this guy, Sam,

and he's sat inside your body

and he's bouncing these kids
up and down on your knee.

- Man, are you serious?

- Yeah, but you looked
beautiful, Eddie.

I mean, these kids loved you.

Really?

- Yeah.

What about Sam?

- He looked fine, I mean,

he looked like he was
really enjoying himself.

- Oh yeah, that's what
I was worried about.

Listen, Manny, I
really need you now.

If I'm gonna get me back and
we're gonna get that money,

you gotta keep watching
this guy all the time.

I wanna know where he's living,

what his work hours
are, everything.

I don't want the dude thinking

he's discovered the
fountain of youth, you know?

- You got it.

I'm gonna watch this guy that
looks like you, but is Sam.

Like a hawk.

- And report to me
every day, okay?

See, when I get a
little stronger,

you and I are gonna pay this
guy, Sam, a little visit, see?

- Yep.

All right, money.

- Ooh.

This is incredible.

We are k*lling the
big box stores.

- And the internet.

- And it's all because of Santa,

but of course, we
won't tell him that

and no one will see
these printouts.

Who knows what kind
of donation he'd ask?

- I just came by to
say thank you again

and good night.

- Good night.

- Good night.

- Sorry.

- Something about that guy.

Toy Town
is closing in 15 minutes.

Take your purchases up
to the cash register now.

- Hello, Eddie.

How's the Santa Clause business?

- I think you might
have the wrong fella.

Very funny, Eddie.

Look, it's one thing
you're not telling us

about the reindeer scam.

It's something else you're not

cutting us in on a
big job like this.

- I'm just, I'm playing
Santa, that's all.

- Eddie.

Always scamming.

- Hey.

Now, one more time.

What's the deal?

When's it going down

and how much you
gonna cut us in for?

- The deal?

The deal is Santa
listens to the kids

and hopefully teaches them
about the magic of Christmas.

That way, they don't turn
out like th*gs like you two.

- Oh, that hurts, Eddie.

That really hurts.

Talk to him.

- Eddie, when you
palm that Santa,

do you use the left or
do you use the right?

That's it.

Hey, Manny.

Manny, get over
here, help us out.

Explain to him that we need
to know what's going on.

We just want him
to level with us.

- Hey, Eddie.

That you?

It's me, Manny.

- Hey, Manny.

It's good to see you.

- Oh, this stinks.

You're in on this too.

- No, look, there's a really
simple explanation, okay?

- You know what, I've
given you enough chances.

Hey, Eddie, I've been wanting
to do this for a long time.

- Hey, hey.

Woah.

- Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah.

Look, there's a really
simple explanation.

I'm telling you.

- This Sam guy's a
pretty good writer.

What the?

Manny.

Why didn't you come
around the front?

- I was worried about
that daughter of yours.

- She's not my daughter, Manny.

- Yeah, okay,
okay, his daughter.

- Well, you could
have at least called.

- Yeah, I would've, but
they wouldn't let me.

They?

- Yeah.

Oh no.

Jeez.

- Eddie, I...

Eddie, listen, I can explain
the whole thing, okay?

- Never mind, forget it.

Look at this.

Guess maybe Manny was
telling the truth.

- Yeah, it's crazy.

All this body change and stuff.

- I gotta say, you're
looking really good, Eddie.

- Really good.

- Yeah, it is me, Al.

If you want proof, I'll
do the reindeer trick.

- Nah, nah, your partner
here wouldn't lie to me.

So what do you want?

- What do you think we want?

We wanna be your
partners, but this time,

on this million
bucks you're getting

for the body switching scam.

- Hey, this is my money.

I'm taking the risk.

But we're your partners.

No, you're not.

I thought I had a partner,

but believe me, Al,
it wouldn't be you.

- Al said you'd be like this.

- Show him.

Cops are
looking for you.

- Go 'head, read it.

You're in a lot
of trouble, Eddie.

Or should I say your
body's in trouble?

See, if you don't bring us
in on this million bucks,

we're gonna bring
your body to the cops

and then your body's
gonna be thrown in jail

and you're gonna be
stuck here in this thing.

- Good luck.

- Take it easy, old man.

- It's very simple.

You cut us in.

We make sure nobody touches you.

You keep us out, well.

- Okay.

Come back Christmas
Eve, midnight.

That's when I get the money

and you'll get your share.

- Okay, partner.

Let's go.

- Listen, Eddie, I can explain
the whole thing to you, okay?

- Hey, you heard what I said.

Come back Christmas Eve,
now get out of here.

Oh man, what have I done?

Without Manny, I won't
know what's going on.

I could be, I
could be kidnapped.

I could be held for ransom.

I wouldn't even know.

- Dad.

You're up?

- Oh yeah, I'm feeling awesome.

Really good.

See, I took all the
pills and drunk the milk.

I've eaten all the breakfast.

- Have to say, you really did
keep your promise this time.

- That's right.

Now, don't you
think your old man

deserves just a little bit
of a treat for being so good.

- Well, what kind of
treat do you have in mind?

- I wanna go to the toy store.

- Oh, come on, Dad, now
you're taking advantage.

- Advantage, I've been holed
up in this dump for a week.

You're sick.

- No, I'm feeling,

I'm getting better.

I'm looking after myself.

- For two days.

So?

- Now listen, young lady.

I am still your father and you
owe it to me to hear me out.

Now, I have not played
Santa this year,

which is bad enough, but
I've also been taking

all kinds of pills
with cabbage soup

and everything else
you've thrown at me

just to keep you happy.

I mean, I think that I deserve

to enjoy a bit of Christmas too.

All I want is to
go to the toy store

for just a little while
and meet with people.

I mean, is that asking too much

for everything I've given up?

Okay, Dad.

Dad, just a sec, I gotta
pay the cab driver.

Slow down, Dad.

Dad, wait.

Dad, slow down.

Wait.

- Sam?

Sam, is that Sam?

It's Santa Sam.

Oh, Sam.

Welcome, it's so
good to see you.

It's me, Jan Sanjip.

- Oh yeah, of course.

How you keepin'?

Oh,
I'm good, good.

- Now this, George, is
a perfect Christmas.

An absolutely perfect Christmas.

- Is that Sam down there?

- Yeah, it is.

- I'm going to say hi.

- George, make sure you keep
him away from the other Santa.

George!

Oh,
Sam, welcome back.

Hi, Sam.

- Come on, Sam.

Give us your merry Christmas.

- Oh, why, it's been a while.

I, well,

merry Christmas.

- Sam.

Sam.

Welcome back.

It's me, George
Oakville, the president.

- Oh right, President Oakville.

- You remember Barbara?

- Why wouldn't I?

- Mr. Sanjip, go and check
the line up in the village.

- It's good to see you, Sam.

- Yeah.

- Is there anything we
can do for you, Sam?

- Oh yeah, yeah.

I wanna see this new
Santa and the kids.

- Today, it's a little crowded.

How 'bout next week?

- No, no, no, that's
way too late, man.

- Carla?
- Yes.

- Carla Jensen, what
are you doing here?

- Came to see Santa.

- I would have thought you would

have stopped believing
in him by now.

- I'll always believe in him.

He's always gotten me the
Christmas presents I want.

- I'm sure he'll be
happy to hear that.

What's that?

- I heard he was sick, so I
brought him some special tea.

- Kid bringing Santa a present?

That's a change.

- I want him to get better.

- So do we all, Carla.

So do we all.

- Merry Christmas.

- Listen, George.

This is the last
Christmas that he's,

that this old body's gonna have

and it'd mean a lot to me to
see the kids one last time.

Make sure your new
Santa's doing his job.

- He's downstairs,
let me take you.

Allow me.

No, no, no.

- Well come on, Sam, you've
worked so hard for this store.

Let me do something
for you for a change.

- Merry Christmas.
- Well, here he is.

- Merry Christmas,
h* h* h* h* h*.

There's a
problem in mechanical toys.

- You have yourself a
merry merry Christmas.

I don't believe it.

That's me.

- Hello there.

Merry Christmas.

- Woah.

- Dad?

There you are.

I've been looking
all over for you.

Dad, are you okay?

- That wasn't me in there.

- Look, I know how badly you
wanted to play Santa this year,

but you can't let it
tear you up like this.

- No, it's not what you think.

Then what is it?

See,

I never saw myself enjoying
Christmas like that.

- Dad, you've always
enjoyed Christmas.

- No, not really.

- Okay.

We gotta get you home.

- No, cool it, I,

I can't go yet.

You gotta take me
one more place.

This is major for
me, I gotta do this.

- Okay, Dad, okay.

There you go, oop.

- Thanks.

- You feeling better?
- Oh yeah.

You know, I always wanted
to learn how to skate.

- Dad, you taught
skating for 20 years.

- Really, did I?

Oh, I mean, you know,
when I was a kid,

I wanted to be able to skate.

See, I was just like you.

All I did was fall down.

- I never knew that.

You were always so good,
I never thought you fell.

- Kids often think that
about their parents.

Maybe they need to get real.

- Bah humbug.

That's not the
Christmas Santa I know.

- The Christmas that
I remember most, see,

there was this one kid.

Terrible skater.

You know, he'd go two
steps, he'd fall down.

He'd get up, he'd fall again

and my buddies and I
thought it was hysterical.

We laughed like crazy,
but this one night, see,

he wouldn't stop skating.

He just kept on
through the evening,

falling down, getting
up, falling down.

After a while, it wasn't
funny anymore, you know?

We tried to get him to stop

'cause after all, it
was Christmas Eve.

I mean, Santa was gonna arrive.

There were gonna be
presents for everyone,

but he wouldn't listen

and then just as we
were about to leave,

his father showed
up looking for him

and the old man
was drunk as usual

and chased him around that rink,

caught up with him and
beat him, pretty bad.

That's what Christmas was
like in that kid's home.

Later on, I figured it out,

what was really
going on there, see.

That kid was just
trying to escape.

Problem was he didn't know how.

- You never told me
that story before.

Did you know the kid well?

- Oh yeah.

I knew him very, very well.

You,

you're beautiful
in so many ways.

It's true.

It's true, anybody
would be lucky

to have you for a
daughter or a friend.

- Dad.

- And I am just so
happy I got to know you.

- Dad, stop, you're scaring me.

- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Look, will you do me
one, just one more favor?

Sure.

- Skate for me.

What, you mean now?

- Yeah.

I would love to see you
fall over a couple of times.

It would mean so much to me.

Okay.

Okay, I'll go get some skates.

- Yeah.

Let's see.

Uh-huh.

There.

Yes.

- Merry Christmas, come on up.

Merry Christmas.

h* h* h*.

Hello.

Well, let's see if we
can make that happen.

Merry Christmas.

- What, where?

What day?

Calender.

I need that.

Where's it?

Where?

There it is.

Finally.

It's Christmas Eve.

Oh yeah.

Man, this day will never end.

I bet they're slowing
down time or something

just to put the screws to me.

Yeah, hello?

Dad.

- Ah, Susan.

You okay?

- Oh, I'm fine.

You know I worry.

It's just, it's
Christmas Eve, you know?

And I just didn't know how
you'd be taking it, that's all.

All right, the library
closes by 8:00,

so I'll see you after that.

You remember how to get in
touch with me this time?

- Sure.

I love you, Dad.

- Love you too.

- Merry Christmas.

h* h* h* h* h*.

Merry
Christmas everyone.

Toy Town is closing
in 15 minutes.

Please take your purchases
up to the cash register now.

- Hello, may I come in?

Please, please do.

- Thanks.

I have a list of charities

I'd like for you to
make donations to.

- Let me see that.

Not a problem at all.

- I didn't think so.

Well, I wanted to thank you for

letting me play Santa this year.

- You were great.

- Thank you, thank you.

- Wait a minute.

Can we count on
you for next year?

- Uh,

well, I don't think so.

I've played Santa long enough.

I think it's
somebody else's turn.

- But you haven't
even heard our offer.

- Well, I'm not sure.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

- He'll be back.

- Eddie, hey.

Open up, it's an emergency.

Yeah.

Hey, it's not midnight yet.

You get your money then.

- Eddie, listen to me.

You disappeared.

- What?

You let him out of your sight.

- No, no, no, no,
no, it wasn't us.

That big guy, he was there
and he did some kind of thing

and then you, that
guy, he was gone.

- I knew it.

I knew it, this was
a setup all along.

How could I be so stupid?

Look, we gotta find this guy
before he gets away with this.

- Yeah, I know, but where?

I mean, where could he be?

- Susan.

Susan will know.

Okay, but Eddie, look.

You gotta chill out.

You're gonna get
yourself a heart attack.

- What do I care?

How would you like to be stuck

in this thing for the
rest of your life?

- Dad?

- Susan.

Yeah, hi, yeah, I'm fine.

Listen.

Help me out here.

What would I be doing on
Christmas Eve if I wasn't sick?

- Where you'd always go,
the children's orphanage.

But Dad, why are
you asking me this?

- Got you, I gotta go, honey.

Come on.

Hey man, this is one
scam I ain't gonna lose.

- Dad?

Hi, I'd like to
report an emergency.

Merry Christmas.

- Dad?

Did you
see a guy come here

with a leather
jacket, dark hair?

He's a friend of mine.

Hey, which way he'd, over here?

Thank you so much.

- Manny, stay here.

I'll be back with the
money and my body.

- Yeah, okay.

- Well, well.

I thought you'd forget us.

Come on.

- Hey.

You guys.

You're trying to trick me.

- We're here as agreed upon.

12:00 midnight Christmas Eve.

Look for yourself.

- You should have
trusted us, Eddie.

- Never mind that.

Let's just get on with this.

I want my money.

Quick, before Susan gets here.

You've been doing a lot
of running around, Eddie.

- Come on, come on, the money.

Wow.

You all right, old man?

- Take care of yourself, son.

It's all been worth it.

- Thank goodness you're here.

- It's all right, sweetheart.

Santa is back.

We all get equal shares.

- Here's your cut.

- Why don't you hold it for me?

- Oh, come on, man.

It's over.

We're back in business.

Look at all this money.

- Think I was too hard
on that old man's body?

He didn't look so good.

- Yeah, to be
honest, I don't know.

- I don't know either.

Where you going?

- What's wrong with him?
- It's okay.

That's personal.

All right.

Why?

- It's all a part of
the cycle of life.

But his
daughter, she needs him.

- Most people need
someone, Eddie.

Sometimes they're lucky enough

to find the right
person in life.

- Yeah, but she's good people.

Why should she suffer?

- Well, why should you care?

You got your million bucks.

Go and celebrate.

Merry Christmas.

- Hey, Eddie.

Eddie, where you been?

Listen.

I wanna thank you.

None of this would have
been possible without you.

- Thanks, Al.

You know, it took all
this for me to realize

what a great bunch of
guys you all are too.

You know, you made me see
things in a whole new light.

That's why I think we should

take our operation
to the next level.

I think it's time I let you
in on the reindeer scam.

- You serious?

Are we kiddin'?

No, partners.

Each and every one of you.

- What is it, Eddie?

Come on, tell us.

- Well, come on, until now,
we haven't had the bait

for the big score, right?

But now we do.

So let's pool our money together

till each one of
us has $1,000,000.

Then we put the reindeer scam

to bed once and
for all, that's it.

- I'm in.

When do we start?

- Tomorrow, Christmas day.

h* h* h*.

h* h* h*, merry Christmas.

Find the Santa, make a fortune.

You ready to win?

I think today's gonna
be your lucky day.

- I've been waiting
for this day, Louie.

- Follow the Santa, here we go.

There's the Santa, huh?

Here we go, one more time?

One more time, one
more time, here we go.

All right.

Follow the Santa.

Where's the Santa?

Where's the Santa?

Where's the Santa?

There's the Santa.

Hey, all right.

- What happened?

- Hey, don't worry about it.

He's just setting
them up, calm down.

- All right, who's next?

Who's next?

That's it, step right up, hun.

Here we go, follow
the Santa, okay?

I'm gonna make it
real easy today.

There we go, we got a winner.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas, who's next?

Who's next?

Hey, listen, you wanna gamble?

Who wants to gamble?

Let's gamble.

- What's he doing?

I think he's losing.

- Not with our money.

- Find the Santa, lay
it down, here we go.

Step right up, come on, people.

Merry Christmas.

Step right up, who's next?

All right.

I'll turn it over.

Merry Christmas,
merry Christmas.

Who's next?

Hey, another winner, huh?

Take care of family.

Merry Christmas.

Yeah.

There it is.

Should we pay her?

Let's pay her.

There you go.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

Thank you so much.

Merry Christmas to you.

Who's next?

Hey, Dad.

Giving away a lot of money.

I think today's gonna
be your chance, huh?

What do you say,
follow the Santa?

Find the Santa.

Oh, oh, find the
Santa, find the Santa.

Where's the Santa?

Come on.

There it is.

Yes.

- Little bonus for you, take
care of the family, huh?

Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.

Listen, I'm out.

Merry Christmas.

Hey, hey, listen, you guys.

It's not what you think, okay?

We still got some money left
here and you can have it all.

- Eddie, that is the craziest
scam you ever pulled.

- Thought I'd put that
trick to rest, huh?

Listen, I'll catch up
with you later, huh?

- Good.

- Hi.

Hi.

Back so soon?

- Yeah.

I wanted to give you this.

I was hoping maybe you could

start a Christmas
fund or something.

- In the name of Toy Town?

- In the name of Sam.

- Yeah, in the name of Sam.

Well, thanks and
merry Christmas.

- You are coming back
next year, right?

- I may never know.

I just might.

- I told ya.

They always come back.

- Good night, Barbara.

- You.

- I heard I lost
the money, Eddie.

Sorry.

- Yeah.

Figured you can't
take it with ya.

- You're right.

You can't.

Well, good luck, Eddie.

- Hey.

Thanks.

- For what?

- Figure you guys had this
planned out the whole time.

Maybe.

- Hey, I never got your name.

- Nick, just call me Nick.

- 'Scuse me.

Hi.

You're Sam's daughter, Susan?

- Yeah.

Do I know you?

- Oh, not really.

I knew your father.

I'm Eddie, Eddie Bennett.

I played Santa this
year for your dad.

- Oh right, right, yeah.

No, I saw you at
the, at the store.

- Yeah.

I'm really sorry
what happened to him.

He was a really great man.

- Yeah.

He used to bring me here every

New Year's Eve when
I was a little girl.

I'm gonna miss him a lot.

- You know, I'm kind of
starting over and I thought

I don't know if you wanted
someone to talk to, a friend.

- I'm sorry.

I'm just really tired right now.

- Well, the truth
is that Sam said

you were a really great skater

and when I was a kid, any
time I tried to skate,

my drunk of a father
would beat me pretty bad,

so I thought, I mean,
maybe you could show me.

- The truth is I'm
a terrible skater.

- You know, I don't care.

- Are you sure we
haven't met before?

Okay.

- Nick.

Nicholas.

Saint Nicholas.

Three, two, one.

Happy New Year.

- Not bad.

- Must have
practiced a lot, huh?

You're good.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- You think?

Woah.

You okay?

* Christmas celebration

* Presents underneath the tree

* Deep in conversation

* Trying to figure
out what will be

* Maybe you were right

* Maybe I was wrong

* Does it matter anyway

* Let's think about a plan

* For us to get along

* There's just one
thing left to say

* All I want

* Is love

* From you

* That's all I
want for Christmas

* I swear

* That I'll

* Be true

* You know that you
would miss the nights

* Holding hands by candlelight

* Girl, it feels so right

* It's true

* All I want for
Christmas is you

* The snow outside is falling

* I guess you'll have
to spend the night

* Santa will be calling

* He got you something
that you like

* All I ever wanted was for
you to be my best friend

* That you'd never leave

* Sit beside the fire

* Burning with desire

* Let's make plans
for New Year's Eve

* All I want

* Is love

* From you

* That's all I
want for Christmas

* I swear

* That I'll

* Be true

* You know that you
would miss the nights

* Holding hands by candlelight

* Girl, it feels so right

* It's true

* All I want for
Christmas is you

* All I want for Christmas

* Is you