01x01 - Das Mouse

[bunniefuu]

Gee, brain,

What do you want
to do tonight?

The same thing we do
every night, pinky--

Try to take over
the world.

♪ They're pinky and the brain ♪

♪ Yes, pinky and the brain

♪ One is a genius

♪ The other's insane ♪

♪ They're laboratory mice ♪

♪ Their genes
have been spliced ♪

♪ They're dinky ♪

♪ They're pinky and the brain ♪

♪ Brain, brain, brain

♪ Brain, brain, brain, brain

♪ Brain

♪ Before each night is done

♪ Their plan will be unfurled

♪ By the dawning of the sun

♪ They'll take over
the world ♪

♪ They're pinky and the brain ♪

♪ Yes, pinky and the brain

♪ Their twilight campaign

♪ Is easy to explain

♪ To prove their mousey worth

♪ They'll overthrow the earth ♪

♪ They're dinky ♪

♪ They're pinky
and the brain ♪

♪ Brain, brain, brain

♪ Brain, brain

♪ Brain, brain

Narf!

[Wheel squeaking]

The transfer
of power, pinky--

From your feet
to air pressure,

From
the inept leaders

Of the world...
To me!

Ugh!

Ha! Good one, brain!

They're all
good ones, pinky.

In tonight's plan, pinky,
we will receive the aid

Of legions
of unassuming humans.

Oh, goody!
Company!

But why would
they help us?

Because they will be
hypnotized by the secretions

Of a rare
peruvian dow-kiet.

Behold!

[Croaks]

What, a frog?

Yes. Its skin gives off

A powerful
hypnotic fluid

Full of active peptides.

Narf!

What is "narf"?
Do you mind telling me
what that is?

Well, let's see.

It's like, "zort!"
Or, um, "poit!"

Hmm.

After we collect
the frog's fluid,

We must devise a plan

To draw thousands
of people here

To ingest it
and become hypnotized.

You mean like a gigantic
pancake jamboree?

Please, pinky, i--

Yes!

We shall mix
the hypnotic fluid

Into a floury batter

And have a gigantic
pancake jamboree!

Here, pinky.
Try these pancakes.

But, brain,
won't I get hypnotized?

That's unlikely.

Besides, to be
fully powerful,

We need one more
ingredient--

The meat of the rare

Deep-water
white crab.

Now eat! I'm trying
to disguise

The bitter taste of
the hypnotic sapo.

Oh, it's really...

Yummy.

Poit!

Blah!

Ack!

Narf!

Hmm...perhaps
less castor oil.

Massive numbers of
white crabs, pinky,

Have gathered
in one place--

The hull
of the titanic.

In the hull
of the titanic?

Yes.

Pinky, are you pondering
what I'm pondering?

I think so, brain,
but there's still a bug

Stuck in here
from last time.

No, pinky.

We must travel
to the depths of the ocean

And raise the hull of
that sorrowful ship.

Behold, pinky,

The woods-hole
oceanographic
institute--

A world leader
in underwater studies,

And tonight,
the unknowing supplier

Of our submarine.

Behold
the alvin, pinky--

Our ticket
to the ocean depths.

Look, brain--
a baby sub on the front!

The jason junior,
pinky--

An additional sub
carried by the alvin

For remote
exploring.

Sorry, brain.

From now on, pinky,

Call me
captain brain.

Ha ha ha!

Aye, aye, brain,
o, captain brain!

Oh, oh, can I be
queequeg?

Behave, pinky,
or you shall
be jettisoned.

Take us ahead
at 12 knots, bearing 229.

Bow planes at 15 degrees.

On my mark...

Um, brain?

Captain brain.
What is it?

Drat!

The sub-club!

Look! We can still
make right turns.

So be it.

Ahead 12 knots,
mr. Pinky.

Bearing...
Right, on my mark.

W-h-o-i. Do you
know what this is?

W-hoi.

Hmm. A yummy
polynesian dessert?

Your associative
powers

Belie your small
cranium, my friend.

This stands for

"Woods-hole
oceanographic
institute."

It is the radar
signal beacon

That identifies
this ship at sea.

I want you to randomly
change the signal

So that we
are not followed.

Randomly? Gee,
I don't know, brain.

Trust me, pinky.
You excel at random.

Now to your task, yeoman.

Aye, aye, captain!

Thanks for hurrying over,
jonesy. How are the kids?

Actually, sir, angela
broke both legs,

And jeffrey thinks
he's a koala.

Fine, fine.

Jonesy, at 1900,
satellite composite imaging

Found an unidentified sub

Off the coast
of newfoundland.

They say it might be some
trigger-happy rocket jock

With a 20-meg party crasher

Out to make the fat lady
sing at the ball game.

Which means?

I don't know,

But it sounds
really spooky.

Take a look at this.

We got a reading

From the mystery
sub's radar
signal beacon--

Its identifying
letters.

Narf?

Have you ever heard
of jack maguire?

Captain.
North atlantic.

Cold w*r nut.
He was discharged.

Always saying that when
the enemy arrived,

It would be
with some mythical

Nuclear att*ck
readiness formation.

N-a-r-f.

Narf!

The old man
is concerned.

The president?

No. Just some old man.

We're thinking maguire
may have been right.

We want you to find him.

No one can
hunt a submarine

Like jack maguire.

The boys want
that thing terminated.

The boys?
You mean the pentagon?

No, my two boys--
josh and aaron.

You'll leave
immediately.

We're sparing no expense
on this one.

Here are
your bus tickets.

Darn!
It's out of fresca.

The sea, pinky.

[Inhales deeply]

"Roll on, thou deep
and dark blue ocean.

Roll!"

Byron.

Good one, brain!

Oh, oh, I've got
one, too.

Um..."Hey, you kids,

Stay out
of that riptide!"

Baywatch.

Prepare to dive,
mr. Pinky.

Narf!

This is our position,

And here lies
thehull of titanic.

Egad, brain!

It's so close,
we'll be there

Before you can
yell "poit!"

We'll reach mars

Before I yell
"poit," pinky,

But your assumption
is valid.

Unfortunately,
because we can only
make right turns

Due to the sub-club,

We must follow
this course.

Therefore, what should be
a 2-hour journey

Will take us...

Seven months.

Oh! Well, that's
a bit longer, isn't it?

[P.a. System]
cruise the harbor
with jolly jack.

Harbor cruise tonight.

Jack maguire?

Who wants to know?

Cia. Got a job
for you.

No more
free harbor cruises!

It's not that.
There's a sub
in the water.

They want it
terminated.

Ha ha!

So, the boys finally
saw it my way.

You mean
the pentagon?

No. Josh and aaron.

This is what
you use to hunt subs?

A good sailor is always
prepared for foul weather.

Hold on to your
newton, desk jockey.

We're going
sub hunting!

Whoa!

Ahh.

How long have we
been at sea, brain?



Ha ha ha!

This is much funnier
than the stud.

Egad, brain,
if we don't do something,

I'll go out
of my mind!

That's a short trip.

Please!

Very well.

I shall work on
my pancake recipe

And see if we can
make it

More pleasing
to the palate.

[Gasps]

Pancakes?

Oh! Well, actually,

I am sort of,
um...busy.

Come, pinky. This is
crucial to our plan.

If the pancakes
are not appetizing,

The people won't
consume them.

I've got
another reading.

Go.


Bearing, 227.

What the heck?

They're running
the nautilus!

The what?


U-boat captain
heinz grindlewald

Evaded destruction
by running

A circular course
based on the golden
mean based on...

The nautilus shell!

Maguire: we'll cut
them off.

Whoever these guys are,

They're darn good.

They're probably plotting
a m*ssile trajectory

For the oval office
as we speak.

[Cough cough]

Well? Any better?

Whoa!

He'd say yes if he
were conscious.

Pinky, are you all right?

Yes.

The pancakes
are still too bitter.

Why can't I make them
more appetizing?

Let me try making
the pancakes yummy, brain.

My mother fed us
very well.

Please, pinky.
You're practically

The poster child
for cheez whiz.

Please!

All right,
all right,

You can cook
the pancakes.
[Buzzing]

Just stop
that buzzing.

What buzzing?

[Buzzing]

What?

Shut down
the engines, pinky!

Someone's dropping
depth charges!

[Grunting]

Did we get them?

Not if they're
any good.

This is captain
jack maguire.

Identify yourself.

I repeat,
identify yourselves

Or be destroyed.

This is...

Jacques cousteau.

Really?

Can you prove that?

Here, ze ocean
is teeming with life,

But everywhere,

Zhere are signs
of man's encroachment.

Darn! It is
jacques cousteau.

The mission
is to terminate.

But jacques
cousteau!

He's a friend
of the earth!

Pinky:
nice cousteau, brain!

Brain: quiet, pinky.

Ha!

Nice try,
captain brain, is it?

But that little ruse
will cost you.

I must admit,

I admire your skills.

Perhaps in another time,

We could have
been friends.

We are very much
alike, you and i.

I doubt that.

I am a lab mouse involved
in an elaborate scheme

To take over the world.

Ha ha ha! No need
to be bitter.

You played well.

Au revoir,
jacques.

We'll see you in
davy jones's locker.

Didn't he sing lead
for the monkees?

Quiet, pinky,
or I shall have to--

[expl*si*n]

Last one.

Egad, brain,

We'll be all right,
won't we?

Brain?

Poit!

Ho ho! We did it!

I get no joy

From the demise of
another man...

Usually!

Yeah!
Oh, boy!

Yes, yes, yes!

We got him!
We got him!
We got him!

Take the jason junior
all ahead full, mr. Pinky.

Aye, aye,
captain brain.

Here's our course--
heading 329,
depth 100 meters,

Bow planes
at 15 degrees.

Any questions?

Um, if you could
be any animal,
what would it be?

Oh, I'd have to say
a hawk, pinky,

So I could soar
through the sky,

Catch little white mice
in my sharp talons,

And feed them
to my young.

Ooh. That's
just weird, brain.

We should
be approaching

The hull of the
titanic at any--

Whoa!
Ah!

Take us up,
mr. Pinky.

Hit the floodlights.

[Smack]

Ow!

Turn on
the floodlights.

Oh, right.
Sorry, brain.

Narf!

Yes, pinky.
Soon we shall have

The white crabs
for our recipe,

And then we shall
have the world!

About that recipe,
brain.

Getting rid
of that bad taste--

Not now, pinky.

But, brain--
cut it out!

Oh, all right.

Egad, brain!
It's so huge!

How we ever going to
get it to the surface?

The same way we escaped
from our cage, pinky--

Air pressure.

Pinky: I mean
that icky stuff.

Cut it out, pinky!

Yes!
Now, start running.

I mean, it's that icky
stuff that tastes bad.

Please, pinky,
cut it out.
Cut it out!

Yes, pinky.
It's beginning to rise!

Rise, little one,
and be free!

Whoa!
Yaah!

[Clang]

Our journey is almost
at an end, my friend.

We release the air
and propel the ship!

Whoa!
Yaah!

Yes!

Just a few more,
pinky.

We've almost served


I begrudgingly admit
your recipe is a success.

Oh.
Thank you, brain.

Nothing like
a pancake jamboree

After you've
blown up a sub, huh?

Ha ha! Pancakes
make people happy.

As the hypnotic
fluid winds its way

Through the minds
of our...friends,

They shall
return to serve,

Happy and content
to have us rule
over them!

Well, isn't
that nice? Narf!

Tell me, pinky,
your pancake batter--

How did you manage to hide
the bitter taste
of the hypnotic sapo?

Well,
like you said,

I cut it out.

Cut what out?

That hypnotic stuff
tasted terrible, brain.

So, like you said,
I cut it out.

Ooh, brain,
that looks painful.

Aah!

Brain?

You can stop
auditioning, pinky.

No one is hiring
village idiots anymore.

Where are you
going, brain?

Back to the cage
to plan for
tomorrow night.

Why? What are we going
to do tomorrow night?

The same thing we do
every night, pinky--

Try to take over
the world!

♪ They're dinky ♪

♪ They're pinky and the brain ♪

♪ Brain, brain,
brain, brain ♪