08x02 & 08x03 - Timmy's Secret Wish!

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ Timmy is an average kid

♪ That no one understands

♪ Mom and dad and vicky always giving him commands ♪

- Bed, twerp!

- ♪ The doom and gloom up in his room ♪

♪ Is broken instantly

♪ By his magic little fish who grant his every wish ♪

♪ 'Cause in reality

♪ They are his oddparents

♪ Fairly oddparents

- Wands and wings.

- Float-y crown-y things.

- ♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪

♪ Really mod, pea pod, buff bod, hot rod ♪

- Obtuse, rubber goose, green moose, guava juice,

Giant snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake!

- ♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪

♪ It flips your lid when you are the kid ♪

♪ With fairly oddparents

- Yeah, right.

[Jazz music]

♪

- Shh.

[Crash]

[Panting]

I wish for a giant tv.

A giant baseball.

And giant bacon.

- Almost there, timmy.

Two more wishes.

- Okay.

Uh, I wish for a trained russian circus bear.

- [Roars]

- Yah!

[Circus music]

One more wish, timmy.

Um, can you wish for a flashlight?

It's dark in here. - I know.

I wish for a group of people

That would cheer for me no matter what I do.

Groupies: yay, timmy!

[Cheers, bells, and slide whistles]

- You did it, sport!

You made your one millionth wish!

- Bleh!

- Congratulations, timmy.

Seems like only yesterday

You made your ,th wish.

That was for a t. Rex.

It also ate me.

Groupies: timmy! Timmy!

Timmy! [Shout]

[Grunting]

- Hey, jorgen.

Are you here to congratulate me

For making one million wishes?

- What are you talking about, turner?

I just smelled giant bacon.

Hmm? Wait a minute.

Did you say something about a one millionth wish?

No godkid has ever made a million wishes before!

- Give me a "t." Give me a "i."

Give me a m-m-y.

What does it spell?

Seriously, what does it spell?

- So, in honor of this occasion,

Do I get something special?

A statue in my honor?

My own holiday? A parade?

- Uh, actually, that's exactly what you get.

Way to blow your own surprise.

But first you get a song written just for you!

Hit it! [Upbeat music]

♪ Timmy, you're an average kid ♪

♪ That no one understands

No, that won't work!

Hit it again!

[Rock music]

♪

- ♪ Since you were a youngster ♪

♪ You had a crummy life

- ♪ An evil babysitter

♪ Who chased you with a Kn*fe ♪

- ♪ Your parents, they would feed you ♪

♪ But wouldn't play at all

Both: ♪ till two little goldfish came ♪

♪ And changed it all

[Cheers and applause]

♪ A million wishes

♪ Never done before

♪ A million wishes

- ♪ Like a magic candy store

♪ Mountains of pudding

- ♪ A pizza castle

- ♪ Copies of your dad

All: hi, timmy.

- ♪ You went to other planets ♪

♪ Deep inside the earth

- ♪ Played with superheroes

♪ Wished for cosmo to give birth ♪

- ♪ You made a booger monster ♪

♪ Fifty stories tall

Both: ♪ if it could be wished for

♪ You wished for it all

♪

♪ A million wishes

♪ A magic tidal wave

♪ A million wishes

- ♪ I had no time to shave

- Comics! Cookies!

And rocket roller skates!

♪ The first kid president

♪ Of the united states

♪ Getting stuff was awesome ♪

♪ Nothing could compare

♪ The multi-colored dinosaur

♪ And super-stretchy hair

♪ But the best part of the journey ♪

♪ The thing that was a ball ♪

All: ♪ was my new best friends ♪

♪ Who loved me most of all ♪

♪

- You clearly didn't wish

For a good singing voice.

It's party time!

- Oh, timmy?

Do I smell bacon?

[Gasps]

Giant baseball. Giant shoes.

Normal-sized russian circus bear.

This can only mean one thing.

The bear and I have shrunk!

- [Roars] - [shouts]

Well, this brings back memories.

Seems like only yesterday

I was eaten by that t. Rex.

[Cheers and applause]

- Wow.

Everything's so timmy-themed.

- The floats in this parade commemorate every wish

You have ever made.

- Look. Remember the time

You wished for the world's largest magnifying glass?

- But I accidentally set the city on fire.

- Which brings us to our next float.

[People screaming]

The recorded screams are so realistic.

- And remember when you wished

For the world's biggest barbecue?

- But I accidentally set the city on fire.

[People screaming]

- And remember the time you didn't want to go to school

And actually wished dimmsdale was on fire?

- Uh, yeah, but...

- Voila!

[People screaming]

- Wait, is every single float on fire?

- Just the first thousand or so.

Then we move on to hurricanes, floods, pestilence,

And my personal favorite, the neutron b*mb float.

[expl*si*n]

- Come on, jorgen.

Are you saying that every wish timmy ever made

Caused some disaster?

- Well, the fairy council is reviewing his wishes right now,

So we will find out.

Don't sweat it.

Standard procedure. Nothing to worry about.

Wow, was I wrong.

We should have been worried.

- Why am I in jail?

- According to the fairy council,

Your history of dangerous wishes

Makes you the worst fairy godkid ever.

All: what?

Groupies: yay, timmy!

- For the safety of the universe

And anything flammable,

You must remain in this tiny windowless cell

Until your trial.

All: trial?

Groupies: yay, timmy!

- Knock it off.

I wish I was back home

With my bear and giant bacon.

- No! Sorry, turner.

But for the time being,

Your bacon and wish privileges have been suspended.

- Do I at least get a chance to defend myself?

- Yes. If you can prove

To the fairy council that you're not a selfish,

Horrendous, buck-toothed demon in a pink hat--

Their words, not mine--

Then you can keep your freedom and your fairies.

- And if I can't?

- Then every single wish

You have ever made will be undone.

It will be as if you never had fairy godparents

In the first place.

Don't worry. You will have plenty of time

To prepare.

- Court is now in session.

- Oops. Wrong again.

Wow, I am for today.

Don't worry, turner.

I'm sure the court will assign you

The most brilliant defense lawyer in fairy world.

- Timmy turner's defense lawyer

Will be cosmo.

- Whoa, strike three. I'm out.

- Greetings, guilty client.

It is i, cosmo, attorney-at-lunch.

- Don't you mean attorney-at-law?

- No, I mean at lunch. I'm starved.

Now who wants korean barbecue?

But I must warn you,

The kimchi is very spicy today.

[Whistle blows]

Check it out, timmy.

I'm wearing legal briefs.

Oops. These are legal boxers.

Ooh, and they're wanda's.

- I'm doomed.

- [Laughs wickedly]

Did someone say

Doomed?

[Laughs wickedly]

I've been floating around out there

For ten minutes waiting for my cue.

And I wasn't about to come in on the word "kimchi."

- Hot, hot, hot.

- Foop, what are you doing here?

- I'm the attorney for the prosecution.

I earned my law degree while incarcerated

In abracatraz.

I also pumped a lot of iron.

Check out these puppies.

Bow-wow.

Hello, poof.

I knew to defeat you I'd have to become something truly evil.

So I became a lawyer.

And I object

To your existence!

- Foop, poof is not on trial here.

Timmy turner is.

Groupies: yay, timmy!

- I'm well aware of that, jorgen.

But if turner is convicted,

Then all his wishes will be erased.

Including that putrid purple pain in my pants.

All: [gasp]

- That's right.

Poof was one of timmy's wishes.

If timmy loses,

Then poof will be gone forever!

- And watching him get erased will be

A blast.

[Laughs wickedly]

Ooh.

[Grunts]

I request a short recess

While the second-degree burns heal.

- Cosmo, you've got to win!

- We need to prove that I'm not the worst fairy godkid ever.

- What? I thought we had to prove

You were the worst godkid ever.

What am I supposed to do with all this evidence against you?

- I'll take that!

And you'll take this.

I'm going to need another short recess

While I recover from the internal injuries.

In any event, timmy turner is doomed!

And so are you, poof.

[Screams] blacking out from the pain.

[Moans]

- The trial of timmy turner

Will now begin.

- Members of the fairy council,

I will now prove

That timmy turner is guilty

Of being the worst godkid in history.

Groupies: yay, timmy!

- Exhibit a:

Timmy turner is responsible

For global warming!

- What? What are you talking about?

- Roll the clip.

- So cold. Sick of winter.

I wish it was warmer.

- Not only did his wish melt the polar ice caps,

It also thawed out big willy,

The belligerent caveman who, as we all know,

Became the world's scariest crossing guard.

- [Growling]

[Roars]

[Children screaming]

[All gasping]

- Hey, less cars, less pollution.

- Exhibit b:

Timmy turner wished for it to rain rabid dingos.

- What? I did not!

- Roll the clip.

- I'm bored. I wish it would rain rabid dingos.

[Dingos barking]

- This is chet ubetcha saying, "it's raining rabid dingos.

How will this affect your holiday weekend?"

[Screams] my weekend is ruined.

[All gasping]

- Cosmo, we're losing!

Do something! - Right, timmy.

I move to strike.

Drat. I left the ten pin.

Oh, I'm a terrible lawyer.

- And those examples are just the tip of the iceberg.

- Which timmy melted. - Hey! Not helping!

- He's also responsible for athlete's foot.

[All gasping]

- I didn't know what it was.

I thought it would make me good at soccer.

- And, of course, there's his now-infamous stinger wish.

- Bees are cool. I wish everyone had a stinger.

- Hey, look, a penny.

- Ow! - Ow!

- Ow! - Honey, ooh, I made honey.

- Ow. All: ow! Ow!

- Neat. A stinger.

Oh, mother.

- I could proceed with more evidence,

But my sippy cup is empty,

And my diaper is full.

The prosecution rests.

Bring in the executioner!

Hello, roberto. I like your new hood.

It matches the blackness in my heart.

- [Roars]

- [Screams]

- Cosmo, you may present your defense.

- The defense rests.

- What? You haven't presented a case!

- No, I need to rest.

All that bowling really wore me out.

[Snoring, muttering]

- It's hopeless. I'm gonna lose everything.

My life is ruined!

Groupies: yay, timmy!

- Don't worry, sport.

I'll get you out of this.

Members of the fairy council,

I can prove timmy turner has done a lot of good things too.

I call my first witness, the crimson chin.

- Say, this isn't my bathroom.

Some nefarious fiend has h*jacked the tub of justice

And the rubber ducky of democracy.

- Sorry, crimson chin.

I brought you to fairy court to testify on behalf

Of timmy turner.

Isn't it true

That timmy is your loyal crime-fighting sidekick?

- Yes. Cleft, the boy chin wonder.

He helps me keep chincinatti safe

From evildoers everywhere.

- Thank you. No further questions.

- Mr. Chin, isn't it also true

That timmy turner unleashed your nemesis,

The nega-chin, onto the world,

Wished that the love of your life, goldilocks,

Would become the evil hair-razor,

And made you realize that you're nothing more

Than a silly comic book character?

- Yes. Yes, yes.

Why do you think I'm in this bathtub?

I'm trying to scrub away the pain

With the loofah of liberty.

- There, there, mr. Chin.

We're all trying to scrub away the pain--

The pain of knowing timmy turner.

Roberto!

- [Roars]

- Ah! Wanda, do something!

- Don't worry, timmy.

For my next witness, I call mark chang.

- Yo, timmy!

Yo, timmy's floaty friends.

Whoa, court room, jury,

Hooded dude with a axe.

Why am I at a yugopotamian bar mitzvah?

- It's not a bar mitzvah, mark.

You're in fairy court,

And I'm on trial for my life!

- So there's no brisket?

Bummer.

- Mr. Chang,

You're friends with the defendant timmy turner?

- Sh'ya! He's a totally gnarly dude

And my number one brasinski.

- Objection. Make him use real words.

I don't know what he's saying.

- He's saying that timmy is a good person

And a good friend.

No further questions.

- I see here you're from the planet yugopotamia.

And isn't it true on your planet,

Everything is opposite?

So that when you say something is bad,

It really means it's good?

- You got it, square, blue, hairy baby dude.

- So when you say timmy turner is good,

You really mean he's bad?

- Well...

- And when you say he's been a friend,

You mean he's been an enemy, right?

- Ugh! My mind!

You're messing with it!

Ahh!

- No further questions.

In your face, wanda.

Roberto!

- [Growls]

[Roars]

- It's okay, timmy.

I have other witnesses.

- Oh, yeah, is it someone really awesome and trustworthy

Who likes me a lot? - You bet.

I call dark laser to the stand!

- [Screams]

- Oh, flipsy, give daddy a kiss...

Is what I would say

If I weren't a diabolical villain intent on ruling

The universe. [Laughs wickedly]

- Dark laser, isn't it true

That timmy turner wished you to life?

- Yes, it is. Flipsy and I exist

Because of timmy turner.

- Thank you. Your witness, foop.

- Mr. Lazar...

- It's pronounced laser.

- Ah, yes, mr. Laser,

Isn't it also true that, since you've been in existence,

You've enslaved , planets in the galaxy,

Causing pain and misery

To untold millions?

- And agony. Don't forget the agony.

- And all because timmy turner

Made a wish for you to be real.

No further questions. I win.

You got served. Yay, me!

- I object.

- On what grounds?

- On the grounds that we're losing?

Cosmo, wake up.

- Huh? Whoa! I had the weirdest dream

That we were in a court room

And timmy was on trial for his life.

- Cosmo, I am on trial for my life.

- Whoa!

Whatever I dream becomes real.

I'm gonna go back to sleep

And dream that you're not really totally doomed.

Oh, and that I get a puppy.

And chest hair.

- Cosmo, focus.

We've got to find somebody who has something good

To say about me. - Poof, poof!

- Look, poof wants to speak for you, timmy.

- Poof, poof-poof, poof.

- Hmm, interesting point, poof.

So you're saying timmy's made good wishes too.

Roll the clip.

- Oh, look.

That's when timmy wished his mom could be miss dimmsdale

So she'd feel beautiful again.

- And that's when timmy wished his dad could be miss dimmsdale

So he'd feel beautiful again.

- Oh, cosmo.

That's the day timmy wished up poof

So we could all be a family.

All: aww.

Aww. [Weeping]

- [Sobs]

We've seen enough.

Poof has made it clear to the court

That timmy turner is definitely not

The worst godkid.

- Yes!

- Objection!

- On what grounds?

- Give me a minute.

There must be something in these legal briefs.

Come on, come on. Throw me a bone here.

A-ha!

I have discovered

Devastating evidence against timmy turner.

He hasn't made a million wishes after all.

He's made a million and one.

[All gasping]

- Foop, what exactly are you saying?

- I'm saying that timmy turner made a secret wish.

[All gasping; foop laughing wickedly]

- A secret wish?

But that's the ultimate violation

Of fairy law.

- Every wish must be accounted for.

Otherwise, godchildren could secretly alter the very fabric

Of the universe.

- I think we all remember

The last secret wish--

December , .

Little joshua applebee secretly wished

For chuckles, the fairy-eating cockatiel.

[All screaming]

- [Screams] - oh, come on.

What's so scary about a silly bird?

[Chuckles shrieks; fairies scream]

[All screaming]

Okay, that's totally scary.

- Ever since that fateful day,

All wishes have been carefully documented to avoid

Further catastrophe.

But somehow turner got around the rules.

- Hold on a second.

We never granted timmy a secret wish.

Right, cosmo?

- I don't remember.

But then I don't remember a lot of things.

Hey, what are we doing in a bowling alley?

- Timmy, what did you do?

- Oh, all right.

I did make a secret wish.

Cosmo doesn't remember granting it,

Because I wished he'd forget.

[Dramatic music]

- Sorry. I just love

To play at funerals.

- Turner!

What did you wish for?

- Okay, don't be mad,

But I secretly wished that everyone would stop aging

So that I could stay ten years old and keep my fairies forever.

- Wha-- what?

When did you make this wish?

- Fifty years ago.

[All gasping]

- So let me get this straight,

You and everyone else on earth

Are actually years older?

- Do the math, jorgen.

Plus is .

You're fine, timmy.

Let's all go home.

If my hunch is correct,

There should be a puppy there waiting for me.

- Timmy turner, this is an egregious violation

Of fairy law.

- You are truly the worst fairy godkid

In history.

- Throw the book at him.

Like this. [Grunts]

- Starting to remember why we're here now.

- It is the decision of this council

That every wish timmy turner has ever made

Will be undone.

And he will have no memory of his fairy godparents.

All: what?

Groupies: yay, timmy!

- No!

- Timmy turner, you have made a secret wish

And been found guilty

Of being the worst fairy godkid ever.

As a result,

All of your wishes will now be undone.

- Yes! I won the case.

Take that, poof!

- [Blows raspberry]

- Foop, you do realize that you are poof's anti-fairy.

Which means, if he goes,

You go.

- No! I won the case.

Save me, poof.

- And now timmy turner's wishes will be erased forevermore,

Ad infinitum, e. Pluribus unum,

And a lot of other latin words no one uses in real life.

[Blathers] - no! Poof!

[Sobbing]

- Hug me too! I'm frightened.

I tell you what, spare me,

And all this will be yours.

Well, not all of it. Can you break a one?

[Moans]

[Screaming]

Both: poof!

- [Screams]

- Oh, no.

Our baby!

- [Whimpers]

Timmy!

What have you done?

- I'm so sorry.

I don't know how, but I'll make this right.

No! Where'd they go?

- Cosmo and wanda have been sent back

To fairy world where, thanks to you,

They will have no memory of their baby.

- And now it is time to undo your secret wish.

Bring in father time.

Yoo-hoo! Father time!

- Sorry, sorry, I forgot to set my watch

For daylight savings time.

I sprung ahead when I should have fallen back.

Hey, I brought gifts!

You know what they say,

There's no present like the time.

Get it? - He's been doing that same joke

For a thousand years.

- So this is the kid who made the secret wish?

You don't get a watch, mister!

I will now set things right

By advancing time on earth years.

Shazam!

- Nothing happened.

- I know. I just like saying "shazam."

And other "z" words.

Like jacuzzi, zing, zamboni, xylophone.

Doesn't have a "z," but sounds like one.

Timmy turner, you are about to age years

In the blink of an eye.

- And you will have no memory of your fairies

Or of this council.

- No!

[Alarm clock beeps]

- [Grunts]

[Screams]

Jumpin' jehoshaphat.

Wait, what? Why do I sound like an old man?

[Screams]

[Squeaking joints]

Leapin' liver spots.

What's happened to me?

I'm--i'm-- [snoring]

Old!

- This is chet ubetcha reporting.

Everyone in the world has mysteriously aged years.

In breaking news-- my back! Aagh!

This just in-- my new teeth!

- Holy toledo.

Everyone's aged years.

Well, I guess on the bright side,

I'm a full-grown adult living on my own.

- Oh, timmy!

- Okay, I'm half right.

- Watch out. I don't know how to stop this thing.

Oh, wait, yes, I do.

Help me out, son.

It's time for breakfast,

And I can't remember where the kitchen is.

[Beeping] timmy!

There's a witch in the kitchen!

Let's drop the house on her and steal her ruby slippers.

- Morning, weird old men.

How about some delicious oatmeal?

And I'll get your juice

With this new-fangled,

a*t*matic who-zee-what's-it.

- You have activated the self-destruct function.

- Oh, dear.

Maybe we should eat out.

- Hang on, witch.

I'm gonna floor it.

- Five seconds till self-destruct.

Five, four, three... [expl*si*n and screaming]

- Chester? Aj?

- Timmy? Your mom blew up your house too?

- Man, it's like no one seems to know how to use

Their a*t*matic who-zee-what's-its.

[Explosions]

- Hey, twerp!

Don't think you're too old

For me to babysit you.

[Motor stalls]

Hang on.

[Straining]

Any minute now.

Can you give me a hand?

- Bye, vicky.

- Whoops, I activated the self-destruct function.

Dag-nabit! [Screams]

- Fellas, what happened?

How did we suddenly get so old?

- Who cares? I'm finally getting my braces off!

Yee-haw!

Oh, that's better.

Now let's go meet some girls.

- There's one now.

[Squeaking joints]

- I saw her first!

- [Hollers]

- I feel so weird.

And not just 'cause I'm wearing an adult diaper.

It's like something's missing from my life.

Do I know you?

- Talking to balloons, turner?

You're loopier than I am.

And I'm .

- Mr. Crocker?

You don't look like you've aged at all.

- Oh, I've looked this way since I was ten.

Something traumatic happened that aged me all at once.

It gave me this hump and lowered my ears onto my neck.

- What was it?

- Where have you been?

Everyone knows it was the day I lost my fairies!

- Wait a minute.

That's what's missing from my life.

I think I used to have fairies!

- That's right. You did have fairies!

Both: fairies! Fairies!

Fairies! [Panting]

- You don't look so good, turner.

Did you bump your hump on the bench?

Rookie move. I've been there.

- No, but I think I did something really bad

To my fairies.

Look, you know a whole lot about fairies.

Will you help me find mine?

- Hmm. What's in it for me?

- Anything you want.

- Well, I could go for a bran muffin

And some prune juice.

Let's not get into the reason why.

- Deal. - Great!

Let's race to the crocker cave.

Right after a quick nap. [Both snoring]

You're in luck, turner!

I've invented

An inter-dimensional matter transporter

That can take us to the legendary home

Of the fairies, fairy world.

[Alarm blares]

- Denzel!

Are you playing around

With that stupid fairy-hunting equipment again?

- Leave me alone, mother!

All that healthy living.

She's years old.

Have a bag of pork rinds and step into the light already!

- Come on, mr. Crocker.

Let's get in that rocket and blast off to fairy world.

I know the answers are there.

- Oh, the rocket just takes us to the living room.

That's where the matter transporter is.

- Is this thing safe?

- I've never used it personally.

But I did test it on mother's cat.

Believe it or not, his name was smoky

Even before I used him as a test subject.

I tested it on mother's bird as well.

Coincidentally, his name is pile of goo.

- You've got this set to the surface of the sun.

- So I do.

I really got to get new reading glasses.

To fairy world!

Right after a quick nap.

[Both snoring]

- We did it, mr. Crocker.

We're in fairy world.

And we're not a pile of goo!

- [Exclaims] there are fairies everywhere!

Both: fairies! Fairies! Fairies!

- We're gonna have to tone this down,

Or we're never gonna get anywhere.

Now help me find my fairies.

- Not a problem.

I snapped a photo of them one weekend

When I was disguised as your mom.

Have to admit, things got a bit awkward

With your dad.

- Wait a minute. I remember them now.

Their names were carlos and wendy.

Uh, no, wait. Conan and wilma?

No. It's on the tip of my tongue.

Oh, yeah. They were both named zeke.

- Yoo-hoo!

If any of you know two fairies named zeke,

Can you tell them we're waiting for them

At the corner of cosmo and wanda?

- Cosmo and wanda. That's it!

[Doorbell rings]

Cosmo! Wanda!

- Dah! Wanda, it's mr. Crocker and a creepy, old man.

- Cosmo, I think that creepy, old man was creepy, old timmy.

- Boy, fifth grade was really hard on him.

- Guys, it's me, timmy!

- Don't fall for it, wanda.

Last time an old man came by saying we were his fairies,

I ended up chained to the water heater

While he stole our dvd player.

- Timmy? How do we know it's really you?

- Tell us something

That only the real timmy turner would know.

- Oh, okay, cosmo, you dress like a princess

And pretend to rule the bathroom when wanda goes shopping.

- It is you!

I mean, that was our secret!

Both: timmy!

- How did you find us?

- Mr. Crocker helped me

In exchange for prune juice and a bran muffin.

- Let's not get into the reason why.

- Timmy, would you mind if I made you ten years old again?

Your hump is really creeping me out.

- Awesome! Guys, it's great to see you again.

But it still feels like something's not right.

- I was just saying the same thing to this purple soccer ball

I dressed up like a baby.

- Wait a minute. I remember now.

You guys had a baby, a baby that I wished for.

But all my wishes were erased, and now he's gone.

- A baby? What are you talking about?

- Gah! Timmy's right.

I remember everything now.

She was square and green and her name was zeke.

- We've got to get to the bottom of this.

If anyone knows what's really going on,

It's jorgen.

- I think the prunes are kicking in.

- Turner?

Mr. Crocker?

What are you doing here?

And how did you find cosmo and wanda?

- Never mind that.

We know all about our baby girl, zeke.

- Oh, thank goodness you know about your baby.

Fairy law prohibited me from telling you what happened.

All that guilt caused me to really let myself go.

- So we really do have a daughter?

- No, you have a son, but his name is not zeke.

It is poof.

- Really? I kind of like zeke better.

- He was erased, along with all of turner's other wishes,

When turner was found to be the worst godkid ever.

- Oh, man.

I remember it all.

I made a secret wish and lost everything,

Including poof.

Pass the frosting.

- My baby!

He's gone forever.

- Not exactly.

When wishes are undone,

They are sent to a gray, sad, lifeless never world.

- Oh, no, our baby's in hackensack, new jersey!

- Even worse.

The hocus poconos,

A terrifying limbo

Filled with erased wishes.

- This is my fault.

I'm gonna rescue poof.

- Zeke!

- No matter how dangerous it is.

- We're going with you.

- Very well, then we are off to the hocus poconos.

We will need bravery and fortitude,

And I'll need some more frosting.

Mm. - And I'll need a quick nap.

[Animals howling]

[Vehicle beeps]

[All screaming]

- We're in hackensack, new jersey!

Now we'll never get decent chinese food!

[Dingos barking]

- Ah! It's raining rabid dingos!

Boy, that takes me back.

Good times.

[All screaming]

- Okay. Let's find poof

And get out of here. - We'd better hurry.

We only have a small window of time to escape.

- Wow. That is a small window.

- I know. They used to be giant french doors of time.

But the fairy elder had this place totally redone.

[Stomping]

- Bwah!

[All screaming]

- Aagh!

[All screaming]

- That monster looks familiar.

- Yeah. It's one of your wishes.

The giant fire-breathing cyclops you took trick-or-treating.

[All screaming]

He's still mad that old lady jenkins only gave him

A box of raisins.

- Trick or treat!

- Whoa!

Somebody give him candy.

- Don't waste your time.

Our magic doesn't work here.

- Bwah!

- How about some prunes, cyclops?

They're not doing anything for me.

- No dried fruits.

Have we learned nothing from the horrible fate

That befell old lady jenkins?

- Bwah!

- There has to be something sweet we can give him.

- What? Not my frosting.

I will defend it until my last breath.

- Bwah!

- Fine. Take it.

I'm not crazy about butterscotch anyway.

- Thank you.

Happy halloween!

- Now let's find poof.

I hope he isn't in danger.

- Gah! We're in terrible danger!

- Lawn gnomes with hedge-trimmer arms?

Honestly, flipsy, who would even wish for that?

[Flipsy barks]

Yes, it probably was turner.

Anything to avoid yard work.

- I don't know what's scarier--

The gnomes or the fact that you talk to a toy dog.

- Stop, pointy-hatted fiends.

You may have long arms and hedge trimmers,

But we have the long jaw of justice.

- Oh, it's no use.

We're horribly outnumbered.

Or should I say, you're horribly outnumbered!

I'm switching to the gnome team.

Hello, fellow gnomes.

What say we go make some toys for santa?

[All screaming]

- Back off, freaky gnomes.

Or answer to timmy turner,

The worst fairy godkid ever!

Groupies: yay, timmy!

- I thought there were five of them.

- Bad vladimir.

If you're hungry, eat a gnome.

- Stay away from my baby, freaky gnomes!

- Don't worry, zeke.

Daddy's here.

- Cosmo. That's a gnome.

- Eh? Come again?

I can't hear you.

Our little angel hacked off my ear.

[Gnomes screaming]

[Gnomes screaming]

- Whee!

[Gnomes screaming]

[Gnomes screaming]

- We did it!

We defeated the freaky gnomes.

- And zeke is finally safe.

- Oh, poof.

Mommy is so happy to have you back.

- Poof, poof!

- So what kind of fairy are you?

- Actually, I'm an anti-fairy.

I spread evil and misery wherever I go.

- Oh, really? As a teacher, I do the same thing.

If we live through this, we should grab brunch.

- We must hurry. The window of time is closing.

- What's closing it? - The hand of fate.

[Cockatiel shrieks]

[Cockatiel shrieks]

- Holy bird, that's a big cow.

You know what I mean.

- It's chuckles, the fairy-eating cockatiel.

[Cockatiel shrieks]

- Curse you, little joshua applebee.

- Fairy-eating, huh?

Well, then, I'm perfectly safe.

Gah!

I'm stuck. Somebody heimlich the cockatiel!

- Poof, poof!

- Gah-guey!

[Cockatiel shrieks]

- It sh**t lasers too?

- Yeah. Little joshua was one messed-up kid.

- What are we going to do?

Chuckles is blocking our way out.

- This is all my fault.

I got us into this mess,

And I'm gonna get us out of it.

Hey, chuckles,

Come and get me!

I'm a fairy! I'm a delicious fairy!

- Wow, turner,

That's both heroic and embarrassing.

[Cockatiel shrieks]

- Timmy did it.

He distracted chuckles.

- Quick! Everyone through the window!

- Evil babies first!

- [Panting]

[Grunting]

[Cockatiel shrieks]

- Oh, no! He's not gonna make it!

- It's okay.

Save yourselves.

Don't worry about me.

[Exclaims]

[Cockatiel shrieks]

Well, maybe worry a little!

Okay, worry a lot!

- Oh, no! Timmy's still in the hocus poconos!

We have to go back!

- We can't! The hand of fate locked the window.

And probably went for a manicure.

- Oh, no! We'll never see timmy again!

- [Screams]

What new jersey city are we in now?

- Fairy court.

- Is that near new brunswick?

- Silence!

You've been summoned because you violated

The ruling of the fairy council.

- You helped timmy turner free his erased wishes

From the hocus poconos.

- Now you will all be punished!

- You're the ones who should be punished

For what you did to our baby and to timmy!

Sure, timmy's made a few mistakes.

Well, more than a few.

A ton, in fact.

But...where was i?

- I'm trying to figure that out!

Are we north or south of atlantic city?

- Anyway, the point is,

Timmy's not the worst fairy godkid ever.

In fact, he sacrificed himself to save all of us!

- Roll the clip!

- Come and get me!

I'm a delicious fairy!

- And now, because of you,

He's trapped in a horrible place forever!

- I'm gonna miss turner.

Endlessly stalking him and giving him fs

Gave me purpose.

- He gave me purpose too.

There's no point in blowing up a planet

If turner's not on it, right, flipsy?

[Flipsy barks]

- Oh, for pete's sake!

We're back in the real world.

Get some help!

- Timmy was my friend and sidekick.

He was the wind beneath my chin.

- Poof, poof.

All: [sobbing]

- I can't believe I'm saying this,

But given this new evidence--

And the fact that I don't wanna go back to the hocus poconos--

I demand a retrial for timmy turner!

- Denied! - Poof, poof, poof!

- That's the most brilliant legal argument

I've ever heard.

- [Grunts]

- Let the retrial begin!

- [Screams]

Go away, chuckles!

I lied! I'm not a fairy!

[Screams]

All: yay, timmy! You're okay!

- Whoa, how did I get here?

[Bang]

- Timmy turner,

We have no doubt you acted heroically

In saving your friends...

And foop.

However, you are still guilty

Of the ultimate violation of fairy law--

Making a secret wish!

- Look, I'm sorry.

I didn't make that wish

So I could have magical fairies forever.

I made it so that I could have cosmo, wanda, and poof forever,

Because I can't imagine life without them.

I don't care if I never get to make another wish.

Just please don't take them away from me.

They're my family.

- Aw, sport, that was beautiful.

We love you too!

- Poof, poof!

All: [weeping]

- You might wanna stand back. My tears are made of acid.

- In all our years on the fairy council,

We have never seen such love

Between a godchild and his fairy godparents.

- It is our ruling that timmy turner

Is not the worst godchild ever!

Therefore we overturn our previous ruling.

- [Gasps]

- You may have your fairies back.

[Cheering]

[Fireworks whistling]

- Bring in father time!

- Looks like he's late again.

- Sorry, sorry! My watch stopped.

Hey, I've got a joke for you.

What's this?

Time standing still!

Ha! Get it?

[Rimshot]

- What's wrong with you people?

That k*lled in jersey city.

- So, we're not there...

- Father time, the fairy council has ruled

That everything should go back to the way it was

Before timmy made his secret wish.

- Very well.

I will now set time back years.

Ta-da!

- Nothing happened.

- I know. I just like saying "ta-da."

I also like saying "yee-ha" and "whoop-de-do."

Both: [groan]

- Yay! Honey, you're not a witch anymore!

- And you're not a weird old man.

Well, you're not old, anyway.

- Yay!

- Time has been restored.

"Shabango"! I also like saying that.

It makes me happy!

- Very well.

Timmy turner, we will now send you

And your fairies home.

- Thank you!

And thank you, guys, for saving me.

And thank you, mr. Crocker.

I couldn't have done any of this without you.

- No problem, turner!

Anything to get away from mother for the day.

Oh, that reminds me!

I've gotta go feed her pork rinds.

- We're home!

All: hooray!

- Poof, poof!

- Boy, I sure learned my lesson.

Never ever make another secret wish.

- And I learned a couple lessons too.

Never give dried fruit

To a fire-breathing cyclops on halloween...

Never hug a gnome with hedge-trimmer arms...

And never invest venture capital

Without a detailed fiduciary prospectus.

- So, what do you wanna wish for, sport?

- Not a thing.

I just wanna hang out with you guys.

Then again, I wouldn't mind some more giant bacon.

- Wow!

You really are the worst fairy godkid ever.

- I've got it! We were in hoboken!