03x04 - Zip It

[bunniefuu]

Come on, Bree,
we're going home now.

Time to get your things
out of your locker.

Yeah, it's not like
we're waiting for you

to open your locker
or anything.

I mean, open it.

Will you leave me alone?

Can I go two minutes without
you two hovering around me?

Bree, with an attitude
like that it's a wonder

you don't get pranked
more often.

Hey, Bree, you know how
you've always said

you wanted to work
a part-time job with me?

I never said that.

Just agree with me, Bree.
It'll be over quicker.

Anyway,
today's your lucky day

because I just started
my work study

at tech town
and they're hiring.

What's tech town?

Oh! It's only the most
awesome store in the mall.

They make you
work weekends,

but what do you have
going on, anyway?

I don't know if I wanna work
at an electronics store.

What the...

[ Camera clicks ]
Aww.

[ Laughing ]

Seriously?
Glue?

That's quite the sticky
situation you got there.

You know what, Caitlin?

If it gets me away
from my two brothers,

I would take a job as a
lifeguard at a sewage plant.

So you're in?
Yeah!

Great!
See you at the store.

Oh, and tech town's
a classy place

so leave the sewer talk
at school.

Hey, dipwads,
how do I get my hand loose?

Hmm. Not sure. But if you
figure it out, let me know.

Narrator: The world's
first bionic superhumans.

They're stronger than us,

faster, smarter.

The next generation
of the human race is...

Living in my basement?!

Donald, sweetie, it's time
to take me to the airport.

Yes!
No mom for two days!

I mean, would the lady
like a hand with her bags?

I think what he's
trying to say is,

it's more fun
when you're not here.

I'm only letting you two stay
home from grandma's

because you promised
to complete

your list of chores.

Oh, I didn't ask to stay
home from grandma's.

I find her delicate
cabbage scent refreshing.

Tasha, why do you need
all this luggage?

You're only going
to your mom's for two days.

That isn't my suitcase.

Oh, that's mine.

Oh!
Ohhh!

What d*ed in there?

A rat.

But don't worry,
I comforted him

by wrapping him
in my dirty laundry.

Okay, how come chase and Bree
don't have to do anything?

They did the chores
last time.

Now it's your turn,
starting with all this laundry.

Ha-ha!

Hate to be you
guys this weekend.

And here's your list.

My list?

I'll have you know,
I have a list of things

I'd like you
to do around here.

Like go shopping,
go to the spa,

you know,
go to the airport.

Go to the airport's on there.
The airport.

Look at this.

I've got like


I have an idea.

Let me guess.

You want to teach a monkey
how to do our laundry.

Leo, don't be ridiculous.

Have you seen
how much laundry there is?

It's a three monkey job.

Right.

I just wish there was a way
to get all this housework done

and still have time
for fun.

Well, maybe there is.

There!

Now we can
get around the house

and do our chores
in half the time!

I love the concept,

but you put this zipline
together in like 10 minutes.

I know, it's barely safe.
Thanks for noticing.

Come on, zippy,
let's go!

You named the zipline?

I'm riding him,
aren't I?

I just need
to pick up speed.

Look, Leo,
I'm flying!

I think we gonna
need a steeper angle

to make it work better.

Better?

That's exactly
how I envisioned it.

Congratulations!
You're hired.

Really?

Yeah.
I'm shocked as you are.

The fact that Caitlin already
put you in the uniform

b*at out your complete
lack of work experience.

Here's your tech town
name tag.

It says "ming."

Yeah, that's
the last person I fired.

Didn't know
the difference

between a flash drive
and an ssd.

[ Mouthing words ]

[ Laughing ]

Ss duh.

Show ming the ropes.

I am so happy
you're working here.

Me too.

I love not being around
my stupid brothers.

It is so liberating.

You know
what I find liberating?

Now that
you're the newbie,

I don't have to do
all the cruddy jobs.

You do.

Have fun
cleaning the bathroom.

I thought you said
this job was fun.

It is.

Now that you're here
I'm having a blast!

Leo: All right,
I'm giving it a go!

Whoo-hoo!
This is amazing!

You've got to try!

Adam: Whoo-hoo!

Tree. Tree.
Tree. Tree!

[ Crash ]

Whoo! Yeah!

That was fun!

Who knew there was
really such a thing

as a flying squirrel?

So what's next?

You know,
just a few more tweaks.

Maybe adding
one or two more lines.

Whoa!

It's beautiful!

Hey, check out
the turbo booster I added.

It'll help us get around
the house 10 times faster.

Awesome!

Wait, do you think
it'll work?

I think
you should go first.

Oh, Adam,
look out for the...

Door! Door!
Door! Door!

[ Crash ]

Man, this is a blast.

Who'd wanna walk
when you can zip?

Oh, it's too bad
I can't sell my legs.

Do you think I'd get more
separate or as a pair?

Either way, I think you'd get
more for those than...

What's going on up here.

You're right.
I do have great legs.

Whoo-hoo!

Big d! Oh!

I know
what you're thinking.

But if it weren't for me,

you'd have a house full of
monkeys doing your laundry.

Hey, hey.
Oh.

May I interest you
in a pair of legs?

You guys put ziplines
throughout the entire house?

We only did it to help us
get our chores done.

How could you do this...

We'll take it down.

And not invite me?

This is awesome!

I cannot wait to try this!

Safety first.

You ready?

I was born rea...
Aaaah!

Look at him go!

He is not a good father!

I mopped, I swept,
and I guarantee you

the ladies room
has never been cleaner.

Why do you look
so happy about it?

You're kind of
creeping me out,

and that's coming from me.

Trust me.

Having to clean
a workplace toilet

is still better than being
around my stupid brothers.

Hello, ladies.

Chase...

What are you doing here?

I just came down to see what
this tech town was all about.

Nice setup.

You guys have
all the latest models.

Except for this one.

This one's last year's.

I couldn't help
but overhear.

I can assure you
we only have

the most current models
on display.

Scott, this is my brother
and I can assure you

that he's leaving.

Bye-bye.

Nope.

This model's old.

I mean, I know
the shell hasn't changed,

but look at that
screen quality.

There's no way
that's glare resistant.

You're right,
this is the old model.

No one's ever noticed that,
Caitlin!

Well, chase,
thanks for comin' on down.

Now why don't you go
lecture people

about the evils of sodium
at the pretzel hut?

[Snorts] Where do you think
I just came from?

Wait.

It's probably a long sh*t,

but I'm looking
for one more hire.

Especially someone
with your tech-spertise.

Well, I'm glad I've exceeded
your tech-spectations.

What the tech
is going on?!

So,
what do you say?

Any interest
in working here?

No. No, no, no, no.

He has no interest
in working here.

Chase, tell him
you have no interest.



Ha ha! He just said yes
to my offer in binary code.

Oh. I wonder what's binary
for "I hate my life"?

Both: 0110001...

I get it!

Welcome to the team,
chase.

You are tech town's
newest employee.

No. No, no, no, no.

This can't be happening!

Bree, I've got a very
important job for you!

Anything to get me
away from this.

Grab your mop.

Someone yakked
by the monitors.

Caitlin,
chase is the newbie.

Why am I still doing
all of the grunt work?

I have to stay
on his good side.

He's clearly
management material.

[ Inaudible dialogue ]

It's always the creepy little
guys who make it in tech.

Creepy girls seem to be
doing pretty well, too.

I'm gonna ride
his coattails to the top.

And then gather enough dirt
on him to get him canned.

Thanks for coming down
to tech town,

where we always
tech care of you.

You know, you don't have
to say that after every sale.

You do if you wanna be
employee of the month,

which, by the way,
I already am

and it's only
my second day.

And would you look at that?

A nametag
with my name on it.

Ooh.

Oh, yeah?
Joke's on you.

I got ming's name tag,
you got her pants.

Look,
you have to quit.

Why?

I like it here.

If you've got
a problem with it,

then maybe
you should quit.

I was here first!

Hey!

No bickering
between employees.

Now, I don't want to play
favorites here,

but I like him and not you.

Whoo-hoo! Yeah!

Whoa!

Aah!

One-handed!

Whoops! Not one-handed. Whoo.

Whoo-hoo! Yeah!

Whaaa!

Comin' through!

Whoo-hoo!

Whoa! Yeah, whoa!

Yeah!!!

[ All laughing]

That is a good time.

But after
two days of this

we should probably
get to our chores.

Both: Yeah.

The chores.

I don't know about you guys,
but I could use a break.

Me, too.
I call next!

Wait guys, hold on.

At some point we need
to finish mom's to-do list,

so we should come up
with a plan.

Ooh!
How about we...

That does not
involve monkeys.

Is a baboon a monkey?

Yes.

Ooh! I have an idea.

How about
we have a contest?

Whoever completes
the entire zipline course

without being
knocked off, wins.

And then the two losers
have to finish all the chores.

Yeah!

Good idea!

Wait.

But how are we gonna
knock each other off?

You have t-shirt cannons?

What mature adult doesn't
have t-shirt cannons?

All of them.

Here he comes!

Adam: Whoo-hoo!
Fire!

Missed me!

Oops. Uh...

Yeah, we probably shouldn't
stand across from each other.

Ya think?

I'm covered in my mom's
panty hose!

Actually, those are my compression
leggings from cycling class.

Get ready,
he's almost here!

Don't worry,
there's no way he's...

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Getting by us this time. Uhh!

Oops.

If we miss him here,
we lose, to Adam,

and the only thing more
embarrassing than that

would be to lose to...
Go ahead, say it.

He's coming!

Oh, no, I am not giving up
without a fight!

Whoo-hoo!

Nice sh*t!

Eww!
Tasha's swimsuit?!

Actually,
that's my...

Eww!
Tasha's swimsuit.

Great day today,
tech towners!

Chase, I think you've
got a bright future here.

Me, too!

Go home, Caitlin.

[ Laughs ]

And chase's sister...

You left mop streaks
in the ladies room.

What were you doing
in the ladies room?

You're good.

Oh, and by the way
my name is Bree.

Really?

Might wanna
stick with ming.

All right,
you guys tidy up.

I gotta run
to foot world.

They're holding
a pair of socks for me.

Chase, you're in charge
till I get back.

Ya hear that?

Just like a mission,
I'm in charge.

And just like a mission
you're obnoxious about it.

I'm outta here.

Come on, Bree,
help me clean this place up

or I'll have to tell Scott

and you're already
not his favorite.

Have you seen that guy?

I don't want to be
his favorite!

Just straighten up
the display models

and dust the screens.

And when you're done,
start vacuuming.

Sure thing, boss.

What are you doing?!

Scott's gonna be
back here any minute!

Oh, yeah. Too bad
you're the one in charge,

so if the store's wrecked,
it's on you.

Oh, you think you're
so clever, don't you?

Well,
you forgot one thing.

I can do this.

Oh, please.

You're gonna have
to move faster than that.

You're only moving
further away from

"employee of the month"!

Sorry I took you out
so hard.

I forgot I had a brick
in my pants pocket.

Why would you even have
a brick in your pants pocket?

Look it's really a long story,
but let's just say

I know a guy
who knows a guy

who was givin' out
free bricks.

All right.

Let's focus. Big d's
almost to the finish line.

I'm home!
Did you miss me?

Wife! Wife!
Wife! Wife! Wife!

Nope, he definitely
didn't miss you.

Good news, honey,
I won!

Good luck talking your way
out of this one,

Mr. Employee of the month.

Great.

I'm gonna get fired.

Why would you do this?

Because I finally found
one normal thing for myself

away from you and Adam,
and you took it away from me.

I wasn't trying to.

I just really like it here.

You guys are always
mocking my genius.

But at least
here it was appreciated.

For $8.95 an hour.

You make $8.95?

Okay, fine.

I get it.

I guess
we both needed this.

But if we're gonna
work together,

no more bossing me around.

When we're here you're
not my mission leader...

We're equals.

Deal.

Although our paychecks
tell a different story.

Scott: Like the socks?
Got 'em at foot world.

Scott's coming back!

Use your superspeed
to clean this place up.

Well, I mean,
if you want to.

No big deal or anything.

Totally your call.
Mm-hmm.

But if you could make that
call soon, that'd be great.

Whoa. Nice job.
Thanks.

It's not as neat
as I would like it, but...

Better. It's better.
It's better.

Thank you.

Here you go, chase.

Oh.

Sorry,
I only have two hands.

Couldn't carry three.
And I forgot about you.

It's okay, Scott.

Bree really helped me
clean the place up.

So you can have mine.

Oh! It's that kind
of selfless attitude

that's gonna make you
a tech town star.

But I'm gonna eat both.

I shouldn't have
to help you guys.

I won.

You body-slammed
your wife...

I'm pretty sure
you didn't win.

She went down hard.

"Aaaah!"
[imitates crash]

Where is she, anyway?

Tasha: Whoo-hoo!

Scrub it, boys!

You thinkin'
what I'm thinkin'?

Locked and loaded.
Mama's goin' down.