01x12 - Saved By The Shell/Tradeshow Showdown

[bunniefuu]

[Jenny]
♪ 5:00, get a call
to go blading ♪

♪ At the skate park
down by the mall, ♪

♪ But my mom says ♪

♪ I gotta prevent
hostile aliens ♪

♪ From annihilating us all. ♪

Hyah!

♪ With the strength
of a million and 70 men, ♪

♪ I guess I really
shouldn't complain. ♪

♪ Still, I wish I could
go for a walk ♪

♪ Without rusting
in the rain. ♪

♪ It's enough
to fry my brain. ♪

♪ So welcome to my life
as a teenage robot, ♪

♪ The story of my life
as a teenage robot. ♪

♪ My teenage robot life. ♪ ♪

[Dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[Cheering and festive music]

[Tuck]
whoa, boy,
the parade of metal.

I love metal day.

I think this may be my favorite
metal-themed celebration.

Aren't you forgetting
about the tinfoil hootenanny?

Oh, yeah.

Sploosh

Hiss

Sploosh

Sploosh

Sploosh

[Slurping]

It's eating all the metal,
the poor, defenseless metal!

Sploosh

Sploosh

Wah!

I'm hit!

I'm hit!

Oh, wait.

I'm not made of metal.

[All screaming]

Finally, my first parade.

Hmm, seems like a lot of people
running and screaming.

[Buzzing]

Hey, buzz k*ll.

You're raining on my parade.

[Buzzing]
mmm.

Blech

Hey, watch it.

If that metal-melting goo
hits jenny,

Her goose is cooked.

Ugh, this is going to be gross.

Smack smack smack

Dang it, hold still.

Come back here.

Jenny, be careful.

Careful?
It's just a fly.

It's a giant mutant
metal-eating fly.

Chomp chomp

[Belches]

[Hawks a loogy]

Sploosh

Yow!

Ow, ooh, ow, hot,
ouch, ouch, ow.

My manicure.

Why you...

Sploosh

[Metal sizzling]

[Whistling through air]

[Metal whirring]

[Buzzing]

Jenny, over here.

Vroom

Sploosh

This windshield
is two-inch-thick plate glass.

Everyone knows acid
can't eat through glass.

Yeah, everyone
named my brother.

[Man]
excelsior!

[Mechanical whirring]

The silver shell.

Looks like you've
got a bug problem, miss.

Do I ever, silver shell.

Ha, ha, not to worry.

I have the formula for victory,
atom girl.

Atom girl?

Uh, I mean, xj9.

I have the formula for victory,
xj9.

What this villain needs
is a little lamppost justice.

He's so brave.

Especially since
he'll be a quick snack

For that
metal-eating mutant.

Oh, yeah, the metal eating.

Chomp chomp chomp

Aahh!

Was that part of the formula
for victory?

Uh, why, yes,
young citizen.

[Laughs nervously]

Now that my opponent
is off guard, I can...

I can...i can...

I can unleash the fury
of twin thunderbolts.

[Electricity zapping]

Blech

Sploosh

Whoosh

Crash

Clunk

[Buzzing and hitting glass]

[Creaking]

Crash

Oh, my gosh,
are you all right?

Silver shell,
speak to me.

Not to worry, xj9.

It was all part of the plan.

Sometimes it's necessary
to sacrifice oneself

To bring liberty
and justice to all.

Wow, silver shell,
that was so smooth.

I think being smooth is
a man's most attractive quality.

[Together]
ugh.

Really?

If you think I'm smooth,

I know a guy
who's twice as smooth as I am,

And I hear
he has a thing for you.

Really?
What's he like?

Oh, he's great,

Lots of fun to be around,
and he has a great personality.

Oh, yeah,
great personality, huh?

Why, yes, and he's real smart,
a genius.

Yeah?

[Computer beeping]

What else?

[Silver shell]
uh, he's brave and heroic,
and he's got great hair.

Is he handsome?

Oh, he's easy on the eyes.

Wow, is he tall
and exotic?

Does he drive a cool car?

[Silver shell]
uh, no.

But he's smooth, right?

Oh, yes, yes, yes,
extremely smooth--

Smoothest guy in town.

Wow, you have to
introduce me.

Well, he's a little shy,
so I don't--

I said,

You have to
introduce me.

Uh, okay.

When?
Tomorrow.

What time?


Where?
Your locker.

And he's smooth?

Yes, very smooth.

[Sighing]
oh.

Smooth.

[Glass breaking]

Smooth, huh?

Jenny wants smooth?

I'll give her smooth.

[Squirting]

Slish

Boing

[Razor scraping skin]

Ting!

[Spraying]

[Coughing]

Smooth.

[Ringing]

I'm going to be late!

[Bell rings]

[Rapid footsteps]

Clunk

[Whistling through air]

Chomp

Oh, my gosh, sheldon,
are you all right?

[Lisping incomprehensibly]

Sheldon, I don't have time for
your impersonations right now.

I'm waiting
for my secret admirer.

[Lisping incomprehensibly]

Hey, watch it, dweeb.

Don't get your garbage
on my shoes.

I have an important
meeting.

Hey, baby.

Don prima, the smoothest guy
in school, has a crush on me?

I'm so excited.

But I'm also a little shy,

But that's okay,
because you're shy, too,

So we have that in common,
so that's okay.

I don't know which one of us
is more shy, you or me.

[Hyperventilating]

I mean, I guess it must be me,
but I know you're shy, too,

So I'll just go ahead,

And ask you out myself.

Sounds great--uh--jenny.

How about mezmers,
say, eightish?

Sounds super, don.

Later, babe.

Wow, what do you think,
sheldon?

[Lisping]
I think he's a complete jerk.

I know.
Isn't he the smoothest?

[Techno music playing]

[Man]
here you go, roboto girl.

I'll show senor prima over
the moment he arrives.

Silver shell?

Oh, uh--

[Laughs nervously]
hello, xj9.

What are you doing here?

I'm just hanging out.

You don't really
seem like the hanging-out type.

Well--confidentially--

My good buddy don prima
was nervous about tonight,

So he asked me
to show up

For, you know,
moral support,

But it's supposed
to be a secret,

So don't let him know
you know.

Got it.

Sshh, here he comes.

Hey, babe, sorry I'm late,
but you can't rush perfection.

Oh, don, you're so smooth.

[Mockingly]
oh, don, you're so smooth.

We'll see how smooth he is

After the silver shell
gets done with him.

[Electrical noises]

[Fan blowing]

[Sucking in]

Achoo! Achoo!

[Fan blowing]

[Jenny]
oh, don,

I love your wavy hair.

His hair?

Let's see what she thinks
when he's bald as a baby.

[Electrical zapping]

A toast...

To the most beautiful girl
at school.

Oh, don, your eyes sparkle
when you say those things.

Smack

Okay, time to pull out
the big g*ns.

[Mechanical whirring]

[Inflating]

So I says to the mayor,
"mayor," I says--

[Farting noise]

[Laughs]

Oh, don, you're so funny.

I love a guy
with a good sense of humor.

Doh!

[Laughs]

Right.

Here's your order, kids.

Caesar salad,
oil on the side.

And one fried pickle, anchovy,
and peanut butter sandwich.

[Jenny]
that's funny.

That's sheldon's
favorite sandwich too.

Sheldon?

That loser from school?

You actuallyknow him?

Oh, no, no, no, no.
I mean yes--i mean--

Uh, he's just the guy
with the locker next to mine.

You should be careful none of
his loser-ness rubs off on you.

Um, don't worry don;
it won't.

I've got a loser-proof coating.

[Laughs insincerely]

Excuse me.

I have to go powder
my rivets.

You may be smooth enough
to hoodwink jenny

And turn her
against her friends,

But you don't fool me.

I can see
right through you.

Right through me?

Like with x-ray vision?

Hey, what color underwear
am I wearing?

I know what you're up to
with jenny.

Squish

Hey, watch the shoes,
you silver slob.

He doesn't care
about jenny at all.

All he cares about
are those stupid shoes.

Hmm.

Those shoes just might be
his achilles heel.

[Buzzing]

[Screaming]

Gotcha!

Bam

Hey, donny boy.

Let's see how smooth
you really are.

Squirt

Sploosh

What's your malfunction,
lug nuts?

If it's that robot chick
you're after,

You can have her.

She's nothing special.

You take that back.

Take it back!

Sploosh sploosh sploosh

What's the matter, loser?
Did I strike a nerve?

[Sizzling]

Oh, my gosh.

What happened?

Sploosh sploosh

What is going on?

Jenny.

[Buzzing]

You again?

You've bugged me
for the last time.

[Electrical zapping]

[Buzzing]

[Violent electrocution]

Crash

Nice work, xj9.

We should team up
more often.

You know, go on patrol,
fight crime, and--

Don't talk to me
about teamwork, buddy.

I saw what you were doing
to your good friend, don.

If this is how
you treat your friends,

I don't want to be
on any team of yours.

Come on, don.

We're leaving.

[Don]
hey, babe.

Don't let that dweeb
get you down.

The night is young.

You've lost the loser,

And you've still
got the donster.

Oh, don, you're right.

You've been wonderful.

My shoes!

You scuffed my shoes.

My favorite italian loafers!

They were perfect,
and now they're ruined.

Oh, ho, ho, ho.

Oh, what did I do
to deserve this?

Uh, you know what, don?

Maybe I will call it a night.

[Sobbing]

Fight crime,
team up--

Like I would ever go on patrol
with that--that--

I can't believe he lied
about being don's friend.

And don--i can't believe
I actually went out with a guy

Who calls himself the donster.

[Sighs]

I think from now on
I need to stay away

From smooth operators
like don or the silver shell.

[Ominous music]

♪ ♪

[Wakeman]
the annual regional
robotics convention.

I hear there's going to be
a display

With square-wave motion units.

I can't wait.

And I can't wait to finally
meet some robots like me.

Now, xj9, don't get
your circuits overheated.

It's very unlikely that you'll
meet another robot like you.

You've been programmed

Using the advanced
cybocell 19 language.

Most robots are lucky
to be programmed--

[Headphones playing]

[Upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[Wakeman]
xj9?

Xj9.

Xj9!

Mother, please
don't call me that

In front of the other robots.

It's so embarrassing.

But i--

Can't you call me jenny,
just for today?

Yes, but i--

Now, just leave me be
until we get to the convention.

We are at the convention.

Thanks, mom.
See you later.

Xj9, wait!

[Upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[Metal clanking]

Hi.

My name's jenny.

[Metal creaking loudly]

Pleased to meet you.

Clang

[Drilling]

Hi, little fella.

What's your name?

Bow-wow.

Can you sit up?

Bow-wow.

Can you roll over?

Bow-wow.

Can you shake hands?

Bow-wow.

Can you do anything?

[Squirting]

Me-ow.

Sniff, sniff.

Glub, glub.

[Man]
wow, a toilet tissue ironer.

Crisp and sharp,
just like a fine dress shirt.

[In an italian accent]
can this machine really control
my unruly moustache?

Boing

That's-a fantastic!

[In a hillbilly accent]
an a*t*matic knuckle polisher.

Hey, thelma-lou,

Check out thems.

Thems is lovely.

This convention is lame.

None of these robots
even know how to talk.

[Robotic man's voice]
some refreshments

For sir.

Crumpets for milady.

Would you like
a soothing cup of tea?

Finally.

Hi, my name's jenny,
and I really like...the...way...

Gosh, I thought I'd go all day
without finding someone...

Hey, spare a few words
for a fellow robot?

Whoa, I just wanted
to say hi.

Oh, for goodness' sake,
just let the poor thing go.

Whoosh

Crash

[Rattling]

Vroom

[Cracking]

[Loud crashing]

[Wakeman]
xj9.

[Crashing]

I should have
known better

Than to let you
wander around on your own.

How could you--

[Man]
nora?

Nora wakeman?

I thought
that was you.

Oh, if it isn't my old
classmate, phineas mog.

So tell me--this tall one
that knocks down walls,

Is it one of your
inventions?

Uh, yes.

Well done, nora.

How did you manage to program
so many defects

Into only one automaton?

[Cackling]

You're going to let him
talk about me that way?

Say, xj9, why don't you take
your little teapot friend

To the robot break room?

Lame robots,
nasty humans--

This convention has it all.

[Robotic woman's voice]
are you comfy, hon?

You've got everything
you need?

Good.

Crank

Why, hello, there.

I'm vee.

I run a robot
rejuvenation clinic.

I'm jenny,

And you're the first friendly
face that I've seen all day.

Come on in.

I've got a free massage for you
and your little teapot friend.

Our massage tables
are state of the art.

They're specially designed

To relax the tired motors

And achy servers
of the modern robot.

There you go,
little fella.

And jenny,
would you like to--

[Wakeman]
help, help!

Vroom

Jenny, wait.

Aarrr.

Now, vee, be patient.

She'll be back.

Stay calm.

Would you like
a soothing cup of tea?

Why, my dear little teapot,

You'll never have to pour
another cup of tea.

Wham

[Electrical zapping]

Welcome to the cluster.

What is it?
Who needs my help?



[Together]
oohh.

Well, I must admit that
it is a fast response time.

Perhaps this robot of yours is
not totally useless after all.

Huh?

Did you send
a false alarm, mom?

Mom?

Did it just call you mom?

Calm your circuits, xj9.

And stop embarrassing me.

I'm embarrassing you?

You're the one who made me
rush over here like an idiot.

If you think I'm going to
let you put me through my paces

To impress your friends like
I'm some robotic prancing pony,

Then you've got
another thing coming.

Xj9, wait!

It looks like the robot
holds the remote control

In this family.

Stuff it, mog.

Xj9? Xj9?

I'm so pleased you decided
to come back.

I just need a little time
to clear my head.

[Wakeman]
xj9, where are you?

Sounds like my mom
wants to apologize.

I thought you wanted some time
away from your mother.

[Wakeman]
xj9!

Maybe something's wrong.

Probably just another
false alarm.

Just relax.

[Wakeman]
xj9, where are you?

I gotta go.

I said...

Relax!

What the--?

Relax, my dear.

Don't resist.

You wanted to clear your head.

Allow me to do it for you.

All your troubles
with those annoying humans

Will be forgotten as soon
as you join the cluster.

You're with the cluster?

Listen, vee.

My mom can
deprogram you.

You don't have to be
a member of the cluster.

[Laughs evilly]

Oh, jenny, I'm not a member
of the cluster.

[Metal clanking]

I am its queen.

And you are about to become
one of my loyal subjects.

It's going to take
more than your dirty tricks

To make me join the cluster.

Crunch

Whoosh

You know, jennifer,
you've got real spirit.

I hope you don't waste it
in defense of the meat people.

Because if you do,
I'll crush you along with them.

Crush us?

You and what army?

Glad you asked.

[Electricity buzzing]

[Chomping]

[m*llitary drum cadence]

Robots of earth, throw off
your shackles of servitude.

The cluster has come
to liberate you.

And we only ask one thing
in return:

Destroy the flesh-wearers.

Arooga!

Chop chop chop

[Teeth chomping]

Ah! Ah! Ah!

[Whining]

[Whirring]

Bam bam bam

Aahh! Aahh!

[Steam hissing]

Clank

[Electricity winding down]

[Whirring]

Yoink

[Winding down]

Clank

Smack

att*ck the flesh-lover.

Crash

Clang

[Buffing]

Crunch

Crash

[Buffing]

[Glass shattering]

[Glass shattering]

[Sucking]

Bam! Bam! Bam!

[Inflating rapidly]

[Loud f*ring]

[Scary music]

♪ ♪

[f*ring loudly]

Boom

Boom

[f*ring loudly]

[amm*nit*on whizzing by]

Clunk

Clunk clunk clunk

Clank clank clank

We both lose here today,
jennifer.

I lose a glorious addition
to the cluster,

And you lose your life.

You'll never destroy
my daughter.

She called me her daughter.

Boom

Hey, mr. Wrecking ball.

[Rattling noise]

Boom

[Rattling noise]

Boom

Crash!

[Lasers zapping]

Clank

Clang

Crash

Your army is gone, vexus.

It's just you
and me now.

Your strength impresses me,
jennifer.

But you still have
a fatal weakness--

Your love of animals.

Whoosh

[Jenny]
mom!

Vroom

Well, jenny, dear,

That's all I have time for
today.

But I'll be calling
on you again.

Ta-ta.

Crash

Wow, that's incredible.

She flew.

She fought.

She conquered.

Wakeman,
this machine of yours,

It's amazing.

You simply must
make one for me.

Ha, there's no way
to duplicate a robot

There is only one
robot like xj--

I mean, there's only
one daughter like jenny.

[Laughs]

Stop it, mom.

You're embarrassing me.

[Applause]