10x19 - Organ donation

[bunniefuu]

Welcome to "Last Week Tonight"!

I'm John Oliver, thank you so much for
joining us. It has been a busy week.

The UN Climate Conference kicked off,

Ron DeSantis debated Gavin Newsom
in a real clash of the who gives a sh*t,

and there was a notable death
in the world

that one TikTok account treated with
the dignity that it truly deserved.

Breaking news: former U.S. Secretary of
State Henry Kissinger has passed away

at the age of 100.

Kissinger served as America's top
diplomat and national security adviser

during the Nixon and Ford
administrations.

That's right, Henry Kissinger d*ed at
the ripe old age of not soon enough.

And if you live in America, you might
view him as a controversial figure.

But if you live in Chile, Argentina,
Vietnam, Cambodia, East Timor,

Bangladesh,
or anywhere else on Earth,

you know that's maybe the most
obscene understatement of all time.

Which is not to say
that some weren't upset.

The New York Yankees, for instance,
tweeted, among other lies,

"He will be deeply missed."
Which, honestly, tracks.

If there's one baseball team that could
appreciate a man behind

a widely hated, morally corrupt empire

that used its considerable financial
resources to destroy its enemies

by any means necessary,
it is the Yankees.

But rather than continue to celebrate
that man going to Hell,

we are going to turn to Congress,
which on Friday, did this.

The George Santos saga
is officially over.

Within hours of his House colleagues
voting to make him

just the sixth member
in history expelled from office,

crews were changing the locks
on his Washington office doors.

His final remark, reportedly:
"Why would I want to stay here?"

"To hell with this place."

Yeah, they finally kicked
George Santos out.

And I say "finally" because it was
their third attempt at doing that.

Apparently, it takes three tries
to get rid of him,

a sort of reverse Beetlejuice
situation, if you will.

What probably pushed it over the top
this time, though, was the release

two weeks ago of a scathing
Ethics Committee report

containing accusations about,
among other things,

his use of campaign funds.

The probe found he used some
of the money for Botox treatments,

luxury shopping sprees at Hermes
and Ferragamo,

trips to Atlantic City and the Hamptons,

and a subscription
to the adult website OnlyFans.

Okay. Look, we've all been trying to
shake our heads and say things like,

"That's not befitting of the office."

Because we know that is not allowed.
You're not supposed to do that.

But I have to say, if you're gonna do
something you're not supposed to do,

that is the way to f*cking do it.

Looking good, going out, and
getting off on gig economy p*rn?

How am I supposed to be mad he spent
campaign funds vibing out on diva sh*t?

And while Santos denies all that,

the spending was just the tip
of the iceberg here.

The report also included a full copy
of the opposition report

his own campaign commissioned
on him,

titled "The George Santos
Vulnerability Report,"

which was 141 pages long,

featuring sections like, "Florida
Driver's License Suspension,"

"Unverified Degrees," and
"Securities Fraud Ponzi Scheme".

Even the cover was damning,

as this was the actual photo
they used, which is spectacular.

It's a photo that says, "Opening
for Sebastian Maniscalco,"

or, "I Faked My Own Death for
Insurance Money: A TED Talk."

And Santos did not take
the vote against him lightly.

Ahead of it, he gave a press
conference that was upstaged

by a garbage truck appearing
in the background.

Which is perfectly on the nose.

He also vented his frustration
at what he saw as a double standard.

I mean, within the ranks of the
United States Congress,

there's felons galore, there's people
with all sorts of sheisty backgrounds,

and all of a sudden George Santos
is the Mary Magdalene

of United States Congress.

We're all gonna stone this m*therf*cker
because it's just politically expedient.

Right? Now, no pun intended,
I was born on Mary Magdalene's day,

which is July 22nd, which,
I find it to be absolutely ironic.

Now, obviously, every word
of that is a jewel

and it's impossible
to pick the sparkliest.

I mean, first, it's good
that he said "no pun intended"

because no pun detected.

Second, that's not irony.
It's a coincidence.

And finally, not to be a total
astrology girlie here,

but it makes so much sense
that he's a Cancer/Leo cusp.

Prone to fits of emotion, loves
to be the center of attention,

and recently hard-launched a husband.
That sh*t is textbook.

The truth is, this man never
belonged in Congress.

He belongs on Bravo.

Just think of everything he packed
in during his brief time

on the national stage.

Like when he implied that his young
niece had been kidnapped

from a playground in Queens,
possibly in retaliation

for his public comments about China,

or that 9/11 claimed my mother's life
even though records show

she wasn't even in New York
at the time.

That kind of messiness
isn't just "friends-of" behavior,

it's full-on housewife.

Santos was unmatched at giving us
A+ headlines

like "George Santos Has Meltdown
While Holding Mystery Baby."

And by the way, when Santos
was asked if that baby was his,

his answer was, "Not yet."

Which is the single funniest possible
answer, outside of maybe,

"What baby?"

I'm just saying, Santos clearly
didn't deliver for his constituents,

but he delivered hard
for the rest of us.

And I don't want him
to be in my government.

And I don't want to sit next
to him on an airplane.

But I definitely want him
in Andy Cohen's menagerie

of damaged human beings.
Call this man now, Cohen.

And pay him what he is worth.
And now, this.

And Now: People On TV Talk About
AI The Only Way They Know How.

Natalie, I don't know if you remember
the "Terminator" movies.

Where computers and the machines
started acting like humans.

That's what I think of when
I think of artificial intelligence.

As someone whose favorite movie
is "T2: Judgement Day",

am concerned about these machines
becoming self-aware and taking over.

I laugh, but I'm also quite serious
about it.

- There was a movie about this.
- Which one?

"Terminator".

It makes you have a vision
of SkyNet and "Terminator," right?

All of us have seen "Terminator".
We know how this ends.

Never watched "Terminator."
We know how this ends, come on.

I've seen this before.

This is "Terminator" all over again.
I've seen this movie before.

- You're scared of AI.
- Yes. You seen "Terminator"?

Whether it's "The Terminator" or not,

I want to find out how
we can make money on this.

Is AI really steps away from being
a "Terminator" of humanity's future?

Plus, Kyra Sedgwick is live to talk
about celebrating 35 years of marriage

with Kevin Bacon.

Moving on. Our main story
tonight concerns organs,

what I personally think
should be inside of pinatas.

Children have to learn that
their actions have consequences.

Specifically, we're going to talk
about organ and body donation.

Organ transplants are a topic
that's been covered on TV

in many profound ways,
including in this moving clip.

Dr. Casper to the ER.

That is what is known in the business
as excellent f*cking television.

We've actually shown you
that clip before on this show,

during a story about, and this is true,
Police Interrogations.

And we will absolutely show it
to you again,

whenever the f*ck we feel like it.

But the point is, organ donation
is extremely important,

which is why there are so many
ads encouraging you to do it,

as well as TV commercials
and PSAs,

perhaps none more brilliant
than this one from Australia.

Have you thought about maybe
becoming an organ donor?

Is this really the best time
to bring this up?

We get it. You know, no one wants
to talk about death.

But, you know, not all of us are
going to the eternal paradise,

and your organs could save
the lives of up to six people.

Seven people.

Not to mention, how your bones
and soft tissue and ligaments

could change the lives of many others.

And corneas.
You'll help blind people see!

What a miracle!

Obviously, I would do it.
I'm Jesus.

Right, of course Jesus would do it.

Though, I will say, Jesus having
none of his vital organs

might complicate his resurrection
three days later.

Easter probably wouldn't be as big
if it celebrated the day

Jesus rose from the dead and then
instantly d*ed again from renal failure.

But that ad is right!
Organ donation saves lives!

And here in the U.S.,
it is widely popular.

Surveys have consistently found 90%
or more of Americans indicating

their support for organ donation.

And around half of respondents to a
recent survey had signed up as donors.

And a lot of lives get saved
this way.

Last year, there were over


performed here in the U.S.

But the system that handles our
donations has considerable flaws,

which sometimes leak into public
view through stories like this one,

about a donor heart that was being
sent for processing

to make lifesaving tissue grafts.

Southwest Airlines flight
had to turn around

because someone left a human heart
on board.

This happened over the weekend.
This was a donor heart, course,

headed to a clinic in Seattle
from Sacramento.

Someone apparently forgot to unload
the heart when it reached Seattle.

My understanding is that the pilot
made an announcement

when they turned around that
they were returning

because there was a heart
that had been left on board.

That is awful!

First: "I left your heart on a Southwest
flight" 100% sounds like

a Lana Del Rey lyric.

But also, it's worth mentioning,
a few years ago,

Southwest celebrated their 50th
anniversary with a campaign featuring

this graphic and the words
"50 years. One Heart".

Which probably should've been
updated to read

"50 years. One heart that we totally
forgot about and almost sent to Dallas".

And while we thankfully had over


the list of those waiting for one
is over 100,000 people long,

with 17 people dying each day
waiting for a transplant,

making it pretty frustrating that
experts say many thousands more

could be done each year if our organ-
transplant system functioned smoothly.

It's frankly no wonder people are
desperately trying to circumvent

the system by posting Craigslist ads,

putting up social media posts,
or even doing this.

Marc needs a kidney.

Now, because of this giant billboard,
that vital message is reaching

hundreds of thousands of people

as they pass through
the crossroads of the world.

It's true, a man in need of a kidney
resorted to putting up

a giant billboard in Times Square.

And that is clearly not what
billboards should be used for.

They should be used to advertise
Broadway musicals,

sportswear, or a weird bird that
someone wants to win a contest

on the other side of the world
for some reason.

Now, the good news is, that ad
helped that man to find

a living kidney donor.

But, again,
many aren't that fortunate.

And the issue here isn't just
with organs,

because in a completely separate
process, each year,

around 20,000 Americans generously
donate their whole bodies to science.

But that system has its own issues

because the definition of what
constitutes "science"

can be pretty loose. Your body could
end up educating medical students.

But it could also end up somewhere
like the Museum of Osteology

in Oklahoma City.

This is our human exhibit.

So when somebody agrees to donate
their body to science,

they could end up here.

It's possible they could end up here.

Do you think, though, that people,
when they think about a donation

of their body to science,
that this is an example of that?

I would automatically think
it would be, yes.

Are you sure about that?

When most people think about
donating their body to science,

they picture it in a reputable
educational institution,

not in some roadside bone collection,
face down, ass up,

arranged in a formation best described

as "Cirque du Soleil performer's
favorite sex position".

The fact is, our donated organs,

while being incredibly important
to saving lives,

are not getting into enough people.

And our donated bodies, incredibly
important to advancing knowledge,

aren't always treated with the care
they deserve.

So, tonight, let's talk about
our donation systems for both,

and let's start with the system
for organs.

Organ transplants are fairly recent.

The first successful operation
only took place in 1954.

For a little perspective,
that was the year Oprah was born.

Organ transplantation
is only one Oprah old!

From there, transplantation slowly
became more common,

and in 1984, Congress passed the
National Organ Transplant Act

that bans the sale of human organs,

and actually opened up access by
establishing a national registry

for organ matching,
to be run by a private nonprofit

under government contract.

And the organization that's held it
ever since is called UNOS,

or the United Network
for Organ Sharing.

It's a national body that sits atop


organizations,

and we'll get into them in a little bit.

But UNOS also manages the
nationwide transplant waiting list.

And in this documentary
from 20 years ago,

the head of UNOS explained the
logistics that go into deciding

who gets which organ.

Many people think that the way
the waiting list works

is that once a person is on the list,
that they just simply stay on the list

until they move up to the top
of the list and receive an organ.

But it does not work that way.

It's a very dynamic and fluid situation,

in which each person is evaluated
based on medical criteria,

matched with information that's placed
in the computer

about each organ donor.

Right. While you might assume that
you just get on the list,

wait your turn, an organ for you
arrives at the hospital,

and a dog eats it off the floor while
everyone nearby kind of rolls with it,

the actual matching process changes
constantly based on which organs

are available and which patients
most need them,

and in theory,
that sounds amazing.

But there are multiple problems.
For starters,

UNOS's computer systems leave
a lot to be desired.

A government report in 2021 cited,
aged software,

periodic system failures,
mistakes in programming,

and overreliance on manual input
of data.

Investigators even cited multiple
system outages,

with one from two years ago
lasting about three hours,

which isn't good.

Every minute matters when it comes
to the viability of an organ,

and as anyone who's seen "K*llers
of the Flower Moon" can tell you,

three hours
can be an incredibly long time.

But it's not just technical errors.

There are also serious issues
with some of the ways

UNOS has ranked patients in terms
of need, most notably,

when it comes to kidneys.

For years, it allowed transplant centers
to employ something called

"a Black race coefficient". Which
is just as bad as it sounds.

Very basically, hospitals miscalculated
Black patients' kidney function,

based on r*cist junk science that said
Black bodies have higher muscle mass.

That made Black patients appear
healthier than they were,

pushing them down the kidney
transplant list,

and it's one reason why,

even though Black people are four times
as likely to develop kidney failure

as white people, they are much less
likely to receive a transplant.

And while UNOS's transplant network
did approve the elimination

of race-based calculations,
they only did that last year,

and have given hospitals
until January of next year

to update their waiting lists.

Which feels like too long,

considering that the correct time to fix
that problem is f*cking ages ago.

And then there's the fact that rich
people can essentially cut the line.

The way they can do this is by
registering themselves

at multiple transplant hospitals
in multiple states,

with the plan to fly somewhere
on a moment's notice

if one becomes available.

It's called multiple listing, and it's
how, in 2009, Steve Jobs was able

to get a liver in a matter of weeks
in Memphis

despite living in California,
where there was a long waitlist.

But there's an obvious reason that
policy doesn't work for people

who aren't billionaire CEOs.

Have you ever been told that you can
be on multiple lists in centers

all over the country?

No. That would be a great idea.

We explained the costs.
Could you afford to fly to those places?

No. I don't think so.

Of course. Booking a last-minute
ticket can be really expensive,

even on a cheap airline like the one
whose logo reminds you

that they once lost track
of a human heart

on one of their Greyhound buses
of the sky.

And there's one final issue
with UNOS,

which is that it's supposed
to also coordinate shipping

of organs between regions,
for instance, a kidney that matches

a rare blood type may need
to be flown to another state.

But even there, it relies on
a primitive system of phone calls

and paper manifests, with no GPS
or other electronic tracking required.

And that, combined with fuckups
by airlines and local organizations,

helps explain why nearly 170 organs
over a recent five-year period

could not be transplanted due
to transportation problems.

Kidneys have shown up late,
damaged,

or, in one case, in a package
that was "squished,"

with apparent tire marks on it.

And no doctor should have
to use a flattened organ.

They're performing a transplant,
not making kidney piccata.

One director of a transplant center
sums up the current situation like this.

When you order a toothbrush
on Amazon,

they can tell you minute to minute
where that toothbrush is.

Well, that's not been possible
for organ transplantation,

even though we think that what we do
is considerably more important

than ordering a toothbrush.

Look, we should obviously be able
to track organs as easily

as we track Amazon packages.

And do you realize how shitty your
organization has to be for me to say,

"Be more like Amazon"?

Things have to be pretty dicey for me
to look into a camera

and say with my actual mouth,

"Please be more like
the soulless megacorporation"

"created by Evil Mr. Clean here".

So, to put it mildly, UNOS could
and should be doing a lot better.

And I will say that it has
new leadership now

and that they are pushing for GPS
tracking of all organs, which is good.

But these changes
have been too long coming.

And UNOS is not the only player here.

Remember, there are also the 56 organ
procurement organizations, or OPOs.

Each operates exclusively
in its region

and is tasked with working
with the families of donors,

facilitating the recovery of organs,
and coordinating their delivery

to the transplant hospital.

The job they do is very difficult.
By one estimate,

"less than 2% of U.S. deaths occur
under circumstances"

"conducive to donation."

Typically, that entails someone being
declared brain dead, on a ventilator,

in a hospital, with oxygen
and blood flowing to their organs.

And OPOs have to approach families
for consent at a time

when they're often in shock
about what's just happened.

That is challenging.

One OPO even put together
a training video for its workers,

where they staged conversations
with actors to show what issues

might come up in the heat
of that discussion.

And it is an absolute
rollercoaster ride.

Hi! Good morning.

You know what?
I already know who you are,

and I know what you want.

And I'm going to tell you
like I told the f*cking doctor.

You're not touching him.
We're not donating sh*t!

If you just give me an opportunity…

Stop! Do you see this here?
Are you f*cking serious right now?

I've been sitting here for over a week!

Over a week I've been sitting here
waiting for someone to come talk to me.

But now that they want something,

now everybody wants to come talk
to me now, right? And what?

They send, what, this character
in to do what? Convince me?

You're not touching my husband.

Rest in peace,
both to her fictitious husband,

but also to that scenery, which just got
chewed up by that acting powerhouse.

We watch a lot of training videos
for this show, and believe me,

that woman is the Meryl Streep
of the genre.

Just to catch you up on this, the man
declared brain-dead is named Jorge,

and they've only been married
for two months.

The guy sitting next to her
is Jorge's brother.

He doesn't want her making
decisions for Jorge.

And he initially doesn't want
Jorge's organs donated either.

But then he remembers that when
they were children, their mom,

who was working two jobs
after their dad left,

details that we do not need
but that we get anyway,

would give them each their
own allowance,

but Jorge would give his
to his brother.

Because he's just that giving.

And eventually, they both realize Jorge
would want his organs to be donated.

All I'm saying is,
there is a rich backstory here.

Now, is it the most gripping medical
drama that I've ever seen?

No, as I've said, that would be this
one, but it is still unexpectedly good.

Now, a lot of OPOs try and get ahead
of conversations like that

by encouraging more people
in their area to sign up

as organ donors,
sometimes through advertising,

and sometimes even using mascots.

Gift of Life Michigan has
Hartley T. Hart.

Donate Life Wisconsin has
Dottie the Donor Dot.

Donate Life Arizona
has Reggie the Donor Cactus,

who, from that photo,
seems to be high on glue.

And Lifeshare Oklahoma has Derrick
the Donor,

who is an oil rig, because,
according to the organization,

"Oil is a precious resource just like
organs are a precious resource."

Except no, they are not
just like each other, Oklahoma!

One of those should not go into
your body! Besides,

this is just a bad mascot.

No one is going to look at that
and think,

"I should sign up to donate
my organs."

They'll think, "Oh no!
That Teletubby is suffocating!"

And because each OPO is responsible
for procuring the organs in its area,

how well it performs
has enormous consequences.

And yet, until recently,

that performance has been determined
by the OPOs themselves,

since they've been evaluated
on self-reported data,

which is a real problem.

Because OPOs can fail to retrieve
organs for many reasons,

from exhaustion of overworked
staffers to lack of resources.

Employees have admitted to gaming
the system to cover up those failures.

Just listen to this former OPO exec.

I used to work at an OPO.

And we reported false numbers
to make it appear

we were doing better than we were.

Imagine there are 10 people who die,

and they all have healthy organs
that can save someone's life.

We might later falsely report that only
four or five of those people

had healthy enough organs
for donation

and make it look like we were more
successful in our recovery effort

than we were. In fact, we might
not even visit all 10 people.

That is not good. And look,
I'm not saying

that you can never lie about death.
But it's got to be a good lie.

Like when Robert Pattinson went
on the "Today" show and said

"the first time I went to see
the circus, somebody d*ed."

"One of the clowns d*ed.
His little car exploded."

"The joke car exploded on him."

And then later admitted, "I actually
made the whole thing up."

The world is a better place because
of that fake clown's death.

But this is the kind of lie
that could actually k*ll people.

The government's estimated that
if OPOs increased their performance,

"approximately 5,600 more organs
per year could be transplanted,"

which is vital because, again,

around 6,000 Americans die each
year waiting for an organ transplant.

But the problem is, despite
the stakes being this high,

OPOs have very little incentive
to do better.

The government has "never decertified
an OPO for poor performance".

And poor performance
can have serious consequences

for people like L.A. poet Tonya Ingram,

who desperately needed a kidney.

She actually appeared before Congress
two years ago to explain

how her region's OPO, OneLegacy,
had failed her.

The organ procurement organization
that serves Los Angeles,

where I live, is failing according
to the federal government.

In fact, it's one of the worst
in the country.

One analysis showed it only recovered


Sometimes when
you're in this diagnosis,

it kind of feels like this is it,

and I will just be waiting forever
until I'm no longer here.

That is awful. And to make it worse,
the then-CEO of OneLegacy,

Tom Mone, wrote her an email,
defending the job he'd done,

and suggesting
that the "number one thing"

she could do to "improve your chances
and your community's chances

of a life-saving transplant
is to register as a donor

and help people in your ethnic group,
in particular,

to choose to donate life."

And if you are ever typing the phrase
"your ethnic group" into an email,

Clippy should just appear and say,
"Stop what you're doing right now!"

I have to say, OneLegacy says they
are "deeply regretful for the email,"

which they want you to know

was a "personal communication
from Tom Mone".

Very much throwing him under
the bus like a kidney in a box.

But at this point, it should be clear:

our system of managing donated organs
is nowhere near where it should be.

But depressingly, it's actually
a paragon of care and thoughtfulness

compared to what happens when
someone donates their body to science.

Which brings us
to whole-body donation.

That is a choice thousands
of Americans make every year,

either for themselves

or when a loved one's organs
aren't suitable for donation.

And it is absolutely essential to both
scientific research

and medical training,
as this med-school video will attest.

The beauty and complexity of the
human body can really only be taught

through the process of studying
an anatomical donor.

Donations provide a tactile sense
of learning and really highlight

the variation amongst human beings
in a way

that virtual reality just can't yet.

I think that this program allows people
to practice

and to learn in a way that will
really help their future patients.

Exactly. Donations to science
can help doctors better understand

the human body.

For example, if I donated my body,
maybe they could figure out

how a man can age 47 years
in a single decade.

It doesn't seem like it should be
biologically possible.

I'm probably going to be fine.
I'm going to live forever.

And in theory, that is great.

Unfortunately, in practice, you might
not end up in front of medical students.

Instead, you could end up here.

On a bright Sunday morning
in Portland earlier this month.

This is somebody that donated
their body to science.

A few dozen people spent the day
inside at this downtown hotel.

They paid up to 500 dollars a seat
in the ballroom

to sit up close to the mysterious
figure draped in a white sheet.

I heard about it through a friend,
decided to broaden my experiences.

The sheet comes off, exposing
the corpse of an 86-year-old man.

This in-person, pay-per-view event puts
regular people, paying customers,

within an arm's length of something
usually reserved

for doctors and scientists.

Okay, clearly, a Marriott hotel autopsy
is stretching the definition of science.

And not to get sidetracked,

but did that guy say he heard
about it through a friend?

Because there is only one way
that conversation should go.

Your friend says, "Hey, wanna go to
a live autopsy?"

To which you say,
"I'm sorry, what?"

To which he says,
"Yeah, they're dissecting a body!"

To which you say,
"What kind of animal?"

To which he says,
"No, it's a human man!"

To which you respond, "Why would
anyone go all the way"

to a medical school to watch…"
To which he interrupts with:

"It's in the ballroom of a Marriott
in downtown Portland."

"But we have to be out by 3:00,
there's a quinceanera."

To which you reply, "Wait, what now?"

To which he says, "Yeah,
and it's only $500 to get in."

To which your only response should be,

"I'll pay you $500 right now to never
speak to me ever again."

"This friendship is over."

The explanation offered by the man
who hosted that event wasn't great.

The body buyer, Death-Science-dot-org,
is run by Jeremy Ciliberto,

who has no professional credentials.

It was Ciliberto who brought
the Portland body show to life

and had planned one for Seattle
as well on Halloween day.

Can you guarantee they had knowledge

that he knew that his body
would be used in this way?

I can guarantee that he knew his body
would be used for medical education.

Bullshit! And I've got to say, I'm not
surprised that that long-lost member

of My Chemical Romance doesn't
have any medical credentials.

But that still doesn't explain why he's
somehow providing medical education.

And yet, that is totally legal.

Because bodies donated to science
are bought and sold

in a virtually unregulated market.

There is no federal law,

and no government agency monitors
what happens to cadavers

pledged for use in medical research
and education.

There are also no government
mandated nonprofits here.

Instead, there are for-profit
companies known as "body brokers",

or, as they prefer to be called,
"non-transplant tissue banks",

who very literally sell bodies
off for parts.

One of the few rules that even applies
to them is a statute adopted

in 47 states called the Uniform
Anatomical Gift Act

that requires donors must
provide informed consent,

with those agreements typically
stipulating that the body will be used

for "research and education".

But "medical research and education"
is not clearly defined.

And, as you just saw,
that can technically mean

that your body might be carved up
in a Marriott for the entertainment

of a grown man in a fedora.

And even organizations that do supply
bodies to medical schools,

like Illinois' Anatomical
Gift Association,

can conduct themselves poorly.

It was accused by one employee of
mishandling and mistreating bodies

leaving some rotting,
or being "eaten by rats".

Which is clearly horrific.

Rats should not be hungrily
devouring human bodies,

they should be hungrily
devouring each other's bodies.

I think we've made our position
on that pretty clear.

And while the AGA said
that it strongly disagreed

with the employee's allegations
of mistreatment,

that employee also says that
he was punished for speaking out,

and in the grossest possible way.

Mr. Wheatley says that when
he approached his supervisors

with his concerns about procedures,
three dismembered heads

from donated bodies
were left at his desk.

My boss walked by. I asked him
why the heads were at my desk,

and he told me they needed
to get back with their bodies

so we can send them to cremation.

And I said, "I understand that.
Why are they at my desk?"

And he told me,

"Well, I don't know, Dale. There's
a lot of strange things happening."

Holy sh*t!

"I don't know, Dale. There's a lot
of strange things happening?"

If you are bold enough to leave
severed heads at someone's desk,

why be passive-aggressive?

Either you're a direct communicator
or you are not!

Pick a f*cking lane!

And body brokers will sometimes make
attractive pitches to obtain bodies.

Struggling families might be told that
they'll receive a cremated portion

of their loved one, free of charge.

Other times, families might be told that
their loved one's body will be used

to research the exact condition
that they d*ed from.

Which is a lovely idea,
but it's just not always the case.

Take what happened
with Cody Saunders,

who d*ed at age 24
from a rare disease,

and I'll let his mother explain
what happened next.

We couldn't afford a burial for Cody.

Cody's mom, Angie, says someone told
her about a company that could help.

Restore Life USA offered to handle
all of the expenses in exchange

for using some of Cody's body
for medical research.

All I remember is they were supposed
to take skin cells

so they could figure out,
maybe they could figure out that,

what caused this disease.

You can see why that would be
so appealing for her.

And it's what makes it so upsetting
that, a month after Cody d*ed,

a reporter from Reuters bought her
son's cervical spine for 300 dollars,

plus shipping, from that company.

And if you're thinking, "How the f*ck
was that allowed to happen?"

Well, in almost every state, it is legal
to sell the human remains of adults.

There are multiple websites
where you can buy human bones.

Skulls Unlimited, which is actually
the company that owns

that bone museum you saw earlier,

sells skeletons that it guarantees
are antiques,

decades-old human bones once
used in places like medical schools.

But under most states' laws,
they don't have to be.

And it is a good business,
by the way.

They will sell you a human skull
for $2,200, or a rib for $40.

You can even buy human teeth
for $35 a pop.

Which is a pretty great deal.

And the reason I know that is,
we bought two dozen of them!

Except, of course, we didn't!
Relax, we're not f*cking monsters!

But we could have done it
if we wanted to,

and I am very disappointed
by how many people in this room

seemed genuinely worried that we
might've done that. Unbelievable!

And you might be thinking, "Well, this
whole story has horrified me so much,

I'm keeping everything inside me
and I'm taking it to my grave."

But it's really important to reiterate
just how meaningful organ donation,

in particular, can be. Take what
happened to Alyssa Sandeen.

Who would have d*ed
without a heart transplant.

And 10 years ago,
one became available,

after this 20-year-old, Kate Leekley,
was tragically k*lled by a drunk driver.

That transplant saved Alyssa's life.

And a few years later,
Alyssa met Kate's family,

and the result was incredibly moving.

Alyssa decided to meet Kate's family.

Over the weekend,
they made the drive to Illinois.

When they got there, Kate's parents
and sister were waiting.

Finally, two families bonded
by a special gift met face to face.

It's so nice to meet you.

Alyssa came with her own gift,
a stuffed teddy bear

for the mother to keep with a sound.

So, they made a recording
of my heartbeat with a stethoscope,

and we decided to give that to her
so she can keep

her daughter's heart with her.

That's your daughter's heartbeat.

Just to hear her heartbeat…

I can't explain it.

That is amazing. And let us all agree
that Alyssa absolutely nailed that gift.

That is about as thoughtful
as gift-giving gets.

It is certainly better than
what I would have done,

desperately look at Hallmark cards

and then accidentally buy one
that says "Happy Graduation".

The point is, we all know
donating organs saves lives.

And giving your body to science
can save and enhance them, too.

But what we currently do
with those gifts is broken.

Far too many people are dying waiting
for organs that could be coming,

but aren't. And one of them,
sadly, is Tonya Ingram,

who d*ed last year, never having gotten
the transplant that she was waiting for.

So, what can we do?
Well, for organs,

we need to raise the standards
of how the system operates.

And there's actually some good news
on that front from,

and I cannot believe I'm about
to say this, the Tr*mp administration.

It actually put a rule in place
that provides an objective,

rather than self-reported, metric for
measuring the performance of OPOs.

And starting in 2026, OPOs
who fall below a certain standard

will lose their contract.

It is one of exactly two good things
that we got

from the Tr*mp administration,
alongside this spectacular gay rabbit.

Now, that new rule is not perfect.

Some experts worry that the standards
might punish good OPOs

by not properly adjusting for things
that aren't in their control,

while also allowing struggling
OPOs an opportunity

to game the system.

One particular worry is the
so-called "pancreas exception,"

which lets OPOs claim credit
for pancreases

that aren't transplanted
but are recovered for research.

And it's not a great sign that one
underperforming OPO in Ohio,

Lifebanc, went from recovering
one pancreas for research

the year before the new standards
were released,

to 151 so far this year.

Also, for what it's worth,
"The Pancreas Exception" sounds like

a direct-to-DVD thriller
from 2003 starring Nicholas Cage.

As for UNOS, this past September,
President Biden signed a bill

that could split up its contract
and allow others,

including for-profit companies,
to compete for parts of the services

that it now provides. Will that improve
the efficiency of our national system?

Let's hope so,
but the jury is currently out.

As for whole bodies donated
for research,

there is a law awaiting a vote
in Congress right now

that would ensure donated bodies
are not unknowingly contributed

to a for-profit industry, which seems
like a pretty good idea.

But even as we are waiting for
these long overdue improvements,

let me be very clear about something
here. I am an organ donor.

When I die and someone is in need
of these sub-par organs,

they can have at 'em!

And nothing that we've researched
or covered tonight,

however unpleasant it's been, has
changed my mind about that decision.

And while personally, I wouldn't mind
being a skeleton doing a backflip

in a museum, I know that my family
might have some objections to that.

So, if you want to,
and you haven't already,

you should sign up to donate
your organs.

You can do that
at Register-Me-dot-org.

If want to look into being
a living kidney donor,

you can learn more
at Organ-Donor-dot-gov.

And whether you want to donate
your organs, or your whole body,

you should probably have
a conversation with your family now.

And I know it's not easy
to talk to them about this,

or indeed, anything.

But it is really important.
Because remember,

lives are hanging in the balance here.

These donations
are immensely generous gifts.

And we all deserve a system
that is worthy of that generosity,

one that operates with efficiency,
saves as many lives as possible,

and that, at the very least,

ensures every heart makes
its airline connection,

and nobody's body unexpectedly
winds up sliced and diced

in a two-star business hotel.
It's just not too much to ask.

That is our show,
thank you so much for watching,

we will see you next week.

And now, I will leave you with
a few more glorious seconds

of the most intense training video
ever produced.

I know that Jorge was found down,


Who was
the first person that was notified?

Yeah, she was contacted first.

You think she had any nerve
to call me about anything?

I called you! It's my fault that you
didn't answer your g*dd*mn phone?

Seriously. Yeah,
it's my fault, right? Bullshit.

All right, stop.

It's getting a little heavy in here.
You doing okay?