05x27 - The Menu

[bunniefuu]

Uh Here.

A present for you.

What is it?
It's a map of an egg.

Uh huh.

Thanks?
What was that?

- I don't know.


- What is this?
Why does Sussie always give everyone such lame gifts?
Yeah! And where's my lame gift?
I demand dissatisfaction! Here she comes.

Ah! What the What is that?
Mayonnaise.

Why?
It's very precious.

You can moisturize your elbows with it or write with it or feed it to a car.

Oh kay, so you just keep mayonnaise in all your pockets?
Don't be silly.

Sussie not crazy, she keeps different sauces in different pockets.

This one's for mustard.

This one's for ketchup.

And this one's for toothpaste! Sussie, toothpaste is not a sauce.

Yes, it is.

It's tooth sauce! That's why it tastes like mint.

Sussie got present for you, too.

What is it?
It's a crumpled green picture of an old man.

I'll pass.

Okay.

Uh! Oh, don't be sad.

You can have my dancing raisin.

You are dancing together.

Sussie happy you happy.

Ah, he kissed you.

He must like you.

Oh, don't they like Sussie presents?
Come on, guys.

Make a little effort to spare her feelings.

Do it on the down low.

There, that's more like it.

Dude.

Well
-played, well
-played.

Uh ah! Uh, yeah, that's good, too, I guess.

Hey, weirdo, I've got a present for you.

Yeah! Ah! Aah! Thank you.

All right, I'ma fight these punks! What, Greco
-Roman style?
Maybe that isn't the solution.

So what do you suggest?
Perhaps Sussie's making herself a target by being so weird.

Hmm.

I see.

So you're saying we poison the town water supply with lead until everyone becomes as weird as her.

I meant we help her fit in better.

And then poison the water! Two really good plans.

One is great, the other one's really good.

There's no way to choose between them.

Okay, fine, we'll help her fit in.

But where should we start?
Let's just observe a normal day in her life.

Hey, there's Sussie Sleepyhead Rise and shine Get out of bed Fix your face and clean your teeth Beauty comes from underneath Hey, there's Sussie The world is waiting The world is waiting The world is waiting The world is waiting The world is waiting And everything is fascinating Hey, there's Sussie Give us a grin And take the whole world on the chin Get out that door and go and seize the day The world's a playground, time to play Nothing can stop this happy girl Apart from bending or giving a twirl Hey, there's Sussie It'll turn out right She's not fussy She's not uptight Wears chicken skin as a hat It goes well with her meat cravat She'll eat a pack of scented candles She's not afraid to lick door handles She might bathe in rancid root Or even toot into a I think we've seen enough.

Thank you.

Definitely time for phase two.

Hold on, Gumball, what's phase two?
The part where you stop being you First, we need to redefine your identity, but it's kind of hard to do that without even knowing exactly what you are.

I mean, no offense, but you do look like the result of some novelty app.

How did something like that happen?
Well, once upon a time, there lived a Mommy chin and a Daddy chin, and Daddy fed Mommy so much food that she ended up with a double chin.

And the double chin got bigger and bigger, so she went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "That's not a double chin" That's Sussie! No, he was wrong.

It was a double chin.

We got a second opinion.

But three years later, Mommy chin laid an egg.

And that's where Sussie came from.

No, it was just because she ate an egg.

But two years before that, Mommy chin put a magic bean inside Daddy chin's mouth and his belly started to grow, and then a voice came from inside it and it said "It's me, Sussie.

" No, it was more like pbht! And then seven years later, Sussie born! All right, whatever.

What we mean is you'll fit in more if you change.

Not fit in totally That's just not gonna happen, but it'll be, you know, like having a lip piercing instead of a face tattoo.

Or more like a funny story instead of national news.

Yeah, exactly.

More "a little freaky" than "a little freak show.

" Let's start with the look.

Hmm.

I'm not quite sure that accentuating her jaw line helped.

Looks like a meat pyramid.

Uh, maybe she needs some hair.

Eh.

Looks like her hair is trying to escape from her face.

Ah! The teeth! It's the teeth that's the problem.

And the nose.

She needs a nose.

And a neck.

Ooh, and eyebrows.

There.

Um Ugh, you know, sometimes less is more.

Okay, uh, let me try something.

Yeah, that's better.

Mm, why Gumball, Darwin try change Sussie?
You know, people aren't always nice.

The world can be harsh.

It can be confusing, heartless, and cruel.

It can turn on anything that is different, that goes against the norm.

Yeah, and I don't want to hurt your feelings.

So I'll put this in the most delicate way I can.

You know the story of "The Ugly Duckling"?
It becomes beautiful! Exactly.

But in that story, you'd be the mutant bog creature that eats the swan, makes all the children cry, and eventually gets hunted down and torched by the townsfolk.

No, but wait, that came out wrong.

Ah?
I meant screeching flesh pile, not mutant bog creature.

Mm.

Sussie understand.

Uh, I don't think we deserve another present.

Just put them on.

Why?
So you can see what Sussie sees.

Mm?
Ahh! You think I'm a weirdo, but look out your window It's my decision to make the world my vision When I walk down the street Everything looks quite sweet I think might pass on eating from this guy's grass Aren't you scared of the germs?
This is how you get worms Anything can be food if you're in the right mood 'Cause I am free It's the key, doesn't matter what people think of me I pick things up from the ground Keep everything that I found What will you do with this trash?
It's gonna give you a rash I offer it to my friends So they can see life through my lens La
-la
-la
-la
-la
-la
-la
-la My laugh is not gracious, but it is contagious It's important to share all the joy you have spare 'Cause I am free It's the key, doesn't matter what people think of me So I brush my teeth with goo I drink my soup from a shoe I keep mayo in my pocket Turn a snake into a puppet Toot to a solo flute I like to sing in the nude But only at the shopping center The acoustics are much better Plant a sausage in the ground so that a new pig comes around Hey! What do you call a chin with two butts?
Um Butty McButt Chin?
Wait, I was I was gonna say names, but it doesn't work if Ah, never mind.

Insult them! Hey, look, it's Tweedledum, Tweedledee, and Tweedle Dirt.

You look like the underside of a stingray.

If you losers were a movie, it'd be called "The Ugly, the Ugly, and the Ugly.

" Next time your parents drop you, try to land on your face Might be an improvement.

Give me your wallet.

What the?
What is wrong with you?
Why'd you do that?
'Cause I am free It's the key, doesn't matter what people think of me