05x14 - Smart Attack!/Operation F.U.N.

[bunniefuu]

♪ Timmy is an average kid

♪ That no one understands

♪ Mom and dad and vicky

♪ Always giving him commands

Bed, twerp!

♪ The doom and gloom up in his room ♪

♪ Is broken instantly

♪ By his magic little fish who grant his every wish ♪

♪ 'Cause in reality

♪ They are his oddparents

♪ Fairly oddparents

♪ Wands and wigs

♪ Floaty crowny things

♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪

♪ Really mod, pea pod, buff bod, hot rod ♪

♪ Obtuse, rubber goose, green moose, guava juice ♪

♪ Giant snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake ♪

♪ Oddparents, fairly oddparents ♪

♪ It flips your lid when you are the kid ♪

♪ With fairly oddparents

Yeah, right.

Timmy: man, this geography homework's impossible.

Where's america?

All I can find on this stupid globe is usa.

Why don't you just wish for a super-brain?

Uh, I wouldn't do that, sport.

Remember the last time?

Ok, children, you have minutes

To finish that pop quiz.

Fairies!

Man, I can't fail this test.

I wish I had a super-brain!

Hey, isn't that the brain signal?

This looks like a job for super-brain!

I'll get a drool mop.

Dern it! I hate geography!

Ooh! Did you say geography?

I love shapes!

This is a parallelothingy!

Dad, that's geometry-- sort of.

I'm studying geography.

I'm on it.

This is cubic zirconium! It's really inexpensive

Even though it looks like a real diamond.

But don't tell your mother.

Don't tell me what?

How much I love you?

Studying rocks is geology, not geography.

Geometry, geology, geography--

I don't know what the problem is.

They all start with "j."

Here's another "j" word for you--jidiot.

Uh, dad, if it's ok,

I think I'll call somebody smarter to help,

Like aj or mom.

Aah!

Or this puppet of a smart guy.

What? I'm not going to sit here

And be insulted like this.

I'm out of here! D'oh! Hey!

I mean, now I'm out of here.

Eeh! Ooh!

I mean, now I'm out of here.

Aah!

Now I'm out.

[Sobbing]

I can't help my only son.

I'm such a jidiot.

I didn't mean to hurt his feelings

Or his spine.

I just need someone smarter than dad.

Or a smarter dad!

I wish my dad was the smartest dad in the world!

You got it.

Jippee!

♪ Smart, smart, he's really smart ♪

♪ He's way smarter than you

♪ Smart, smart, smartily smart ♪

♪ Really smart, he's just a smarty ♪

Eureka!

Which isn't just an exclamation of discovery.

It's a town in both california and kansas.

So, wanda, isn't this about the time you warn me

About how this wish could go horribly wrong?

Actually, I sort of like this one.

In fact, isn't there anybody else

You'd like to make smarter?

Curse you, round hole!

Anybody? At all? That rhymes with josmo?

Greetings genetic combination of your mother and myself!

Aah! Aah!

Did you say you needed help with your homework?

Mountainous, equator, isthmus, peninsula,

Arctic circle, green bay, wisconsin.

Awesome! You're the smartest dad ever!

I love you...now!

Now, son, super geniuses like me

Don't have time for emotions.

Besides, we have to get this test to mr. Crocker.

Aah! Warm tub, soft bubbles, and the sweet smell

Of peppermint and patchouli candles.

What is this perfect bath missing?

Of course! A child to fail!

Wait a minute, these answers are all correct!

But I don't care. F!

And now I do! A!

[Boom]

Plus!

Timmy: ha ha ha! Awesome!

And way to make a telescope so I could see it all.

It was elementary, timmy.

Cubic zirconium makes a great lens.

But diamonds are even better!

Rise and shine, timmy.

What? But it's only a.m.

Yes, but it's p.m. Greenwich mean time,

And that means that it's time for school.

But school doesn't start for hours.

My son will not be part of the mundane ritual

Of public education.

I have bigger plans for my progeny.

You mean I don't have to go to school?

I love having a smart dad to teach me!

And I love having a dumb son to teach!

Now, come! Learning awaits!

Oh, boy. Breakfast.

I don't know what to eat.

Actually, timmy, it's time to learn

What not to eat.

Ooh, not that!

That's made of starch and sugars.

Or that! I didn't cook that turkey

To an internal temperature of degrees.

Or any of that. It's all unhealthy!

Then what can I eat?

Hmm. Well...

Fish is considered brain food.

High in protein, low in fat.

Ha! He hasn't seen you in shorts.

Shh!

Eeh! Did this fish just say something?

Uh, of course not.

Now come on.

Isn't it time for another lesson?

A totally non-fish- related lesson?

Of course! Astronomy!

Let us not tarry.

Hey, where's my swing set?

Where's my tree house?

I tore apart and violated the two things in the backyard

That are completely and utterly yours in order to make this:

An observatory!

And since I can't use your mom's ring anymore,

I borrowed her contacts to make the lens.

I can't see. Oops!

[Cat meows]

Those are constellations.

That's taurus, that's sagittarius,

And that's pisces, the fish!

Hang on a second.

Oh, no! He's observing us!

Act like a fish. Act like a fish!

Uh, uh--moo.

Yeeh! Moo?

Fish don't moo or wear crowns.

And I don't remember

Ever buying fish food for them...

Or crowns!

Do you know what this means?

Don't say fairies. Don't say fairies.

Don't say fairies. Don't say fairies.

These must be genetically-altered super fish!

To the lab that I made out of your toys.

Still can't see! Aah!

[Beeping]

Dad: well, I'll be spliced!

These fish have constructed a castle

That's larger on the inside than it is on the outside.

There's only one logical explanation for that.

Don't say magic. Don't say magic. Don't say magic.

Nanobots!

Phew! Phew!

I'll need a blood sample.

Aah!

Aah!

Get away from my wife! I mean--moo!

Eeh! Oh, my gosh.

These aren't just super fish,

They're non-eating, talking, castle-building,

Jealousy-prone super fish!

Do you know what we have here?

A family secret that we both must swear to never reveal?

Wrong! We're going straight to the dimsdale science symposium

To announce my discovery--

And then the whole world will know I'm smart.

To the science symposium!

Man: so, let's give a big round of applause

To professor glebben-glubbin

And his helium-soled hinden shoes.

[Cheering, applause]

Fellow science geniuses who are not as smart as me,

Pardon the interruption, but I have discovered

Non-eating, castle-building, talking, jealous super fish!

[Gasping]

Speak fish. Speak!

So, you're just gonna make 'em talk, right?

Oh, heavens no.

I'm going to rip them open

And show everybody their vocal chords.

Aah! Aah!

[Screaming]

Dad! No! Please!

They're not just super fish, they're my pets,

And I love them!

Love? Is that an emotion?

Love does not compute.

But think of the awards, the recognition...

The awards!

Tears? A physical manifestation of extreme sadness?

Ooh, I must reassess.

Sadness? Sadness does not compute.

What are you waiting for?

Rip them open and show us their vocal chords!

I can't do this.

Maybe I'm passing up fame and fortune,

But I'd be the stupidest dad on earth

If I thought science was more important than my son!

Can't you all comprehend that?

What? What?

[Boom]

Hmm. You may have a point.

[Boom]

I comprehend it, dad.

Thanks, offspring.

And I wish everything

Was back to the way it was supposed to be.

Wishing? That's illogical.

Did it work?

What's this sharp thing?

Aah!

Eureka! I think I've broken my eureka!

It worked.

A round hole! I'm on it.

Aah! Stupid round hole!

Hey, kids, super-brain here to say

Remember to eat your vegetables.

[Bell ringing]

Man, this has to be the greatest spring break ever!

I know. I hate that we have to go back to school!

Spring break might be over, but you have to admit

It sure was fun!

Oh, sure. For you,

But from my perspective, this stinks.

Attention, urchins.

Timmy, run!

It's your super-rich arch enemy

Remy bucksaplenty.

Guys, guys, relax.

Bucksaplenty and I have a truce.

Our rivalry ended like magic.

[Giggling]

That's right, turner.

In fact, I thought I'd pop by to say ta-ta

Before I return to the f.u.n. Academy.

The f.u.n. Academy?

A school you live at hours a day

And days a week?

Who would want to live at school?

Who wouldn't?

There are...

Fun, games, and unbelievable food!

[Beeping]

Oops. Gotta be back by : .

I don't want to be late.

They might punish me by giving me day-old caviar.

Ta-ta, turner.

Oh, don't listen to him.

Our school can be fun, too.

Good news, students, during the spring break,

I invented a pen that can write "f"s using your own tears.

Oh, man!

I wish I had a scholarship to the f.u.n. Academy.

Me, too.

I wish we all did.

Well, here we are,

You spontaneous scholarship winners, you.

Man, I hope my mom doesn't start bawling

When we get out.

Don't waste time writing!

To the bahamas!

[Tires squealing]

[Growling]

Uh, this kind of looks like the way

My uncle bitty described jail.

Oh, come on.

Nothing says fun like fog.

Who knows what fun awaits us in there?

Come on, guys.

Let's get lost in the fun.

Hey, ho! I'm timmy turner,

And I'm here to have fun!

Are you mocking us?

This is the f.u.n. Academy, right?

Where's the fun?

F-u-n academy.

It's a military school for troublemaking kids...

Like me!

Like me!

Like me.

Ah, am I the only one thinking--

Run!

Oh, so it isn't just me?

[Panting]

Oh, welcome to f.u.n. Academy, my friend.

You tricked me into coming to a military school?

I thought we had a truce!

We did. It was like magic.

Now it's over... Like magic!

[Giggling]

Wait, that's not funny to me.

It is to me.

I'm a ne'er do well.

What's going on here?

My parents sent me here and demanded I stay,

But thanks to juandissimo, I'm living here in style.

You like it?

I find it very "under the tuscan sun."

So that's your plan?

Make me and my friends miserable?

That's not gonna happen.

Cosmo, wanda, I wish--

Attention!

Shallowgrave, what are you doing here?

I thought you were a truant officer.

I was...until some punk with a pink cap

Cost me my job.

But don't think I'm gonna hold that against you.

Now give me , push-ups!

Hey, give that back!

Those are my godpare-- uh, godpare--pair of fish!

Ugh!

Pets are fun, and fun is strictly against

F.u.n. Academy regulations!

Which, I have to admit, is a bit of a misnomer.

I'll just put these fish in the junk shed,

Where we store all the other confiscated fun stuff.

What makes you think

You can tell me what to do, cadet?

Oh, that's right. Carry on, soldier.

[Growling]

Hey, only timmy gets to touch the bowl!

You know, this is a giant waste of time.

The minute timmy is alone, we're poofing back to him.

You forget I know all about fairies

And their weaknesses, like butterfly nets!

Uh! Oh no. Our magic. Where's it gone?

What? Did I hear that the magic is gone

Between you two?

Juandissimo, please. Wanda's right here.

I'm ashamed of you, juandissimo.

How could you be part of this horrible lie?

I am many things.

Most of them involving being very sexy,

But a liar I am not!

But I could be persuaded to bend the truth.

Oh! I hope timmy doesn't have it too rough.

[Buzzing]

Well, remy said there was food we couldn't believe.

He's right.

I don't believe this food!

Cock-a-doodle-- do you think I'm sexy?

[Snoring]

["Reveille" playing]

Aah!

Ugh!

Well, as long as you're down there, turner,

Give me push-ups.

Did I say ? I meant , !

Ha ha! Once again, I have proven my superiority.

[Evil laughter]

You evil little boy!

Why, thank you.

[Laughing]

For you, mi amore.

I don't speak dutch, but thanks.

Juandissimo, if you really loved me,

You'd bust us out of here.

And if you really loved me,

You'd bring more barbecue sauce.

I would love to, but remy has forbid it.

Did remy forbid seconds?

[Burping]

Future soldiers,

Mercenaries, and adult ne'er do wells,

This is a great day.

The marine corps has generously donated

This obstacle course to our school...

Because it was too scary for them.

Each student will run the course.

We'll be going in alphabetical order.

Yeah!

Starting with "t", "a", and "c."

Ooh! Ooh!

We'll never survive that.

We gotta get out of here.

We gotta go over the wall.

Or under it.

I think I can bite my way through this dirt!

Wonder brace powers activating!

Munch, munch, munch, munch, munch...

Wow! This dirt tastes better than the food here.

To make the obstacle course more challenging,

They only have one minute to finish.

[Mumbling]

And this $ bill says

If they don't get to the shed on the other side in time,

We'll blow it up.

It says f.u.n.!

It doesn't look very fun.

Blown up?

Oh, my sad, aching, muscular, fantastic heart!

I cannot bare to see you blown up.

So you're letting us go?

No, no. I'm leaving.

But if you survive this, I'll call you.

He's not gonna call, is he?

[Munch, munch...]

If I can just figure out a way to inflate our clothes,

I can get us over that wall.

Guys, we can't leave yet.

We have to run that course.

My fish are in that shed.

And we care why?

Because if I've learned two things here,

It's that remy bucksaplenty is a lying, conniving weasel,

And that we leave no man--fish behind!

Now, who's with me?

I am!

And if you'll never make a speech like that again,

So am i.

On the count of ,

, ...

[Whistles]

Aah!

[Roaring]

Wow! Not a scratch!

Whoo-hoo!

The wall!

We'll never make it over this in seconds.

I've got an idea,

But it's pretty bold.

Duh.

Hurry!

Relax. I'm prepared for anything.

Except that! I'm not prepared for that!

[Laughing]

[Both laughing]

This I do not find funny.

[Laughing]

Now that, that is hilarious!

Guys, you're ok!

I don't know what I would've done without you!

You're my best friends!

Except for you guys.

I wish everything was back to normal.

Wow. Wasn't that the most completely normal,

Nothing weird happened at all that you can remember

Spring break ever?

Uh...yeah. Uh...yeah.

Well, everything's exactly the way it should be.

Turner, you're late for class!

Wait a minute, where did I put your f?

Gaah!

Well, this is a tad ironic.

Wow, that's the first time I've ever been happy

To get an f!

[Laughing]

Juandissimo: do you think I'm sexy?