07x06 - Arriving Late to a Reunion Makes it Hard to Enter

[bunniefuu]

Restaurant,Sign: Restaurant Ketsunoi

W: Welcome.

W: Your room is this way.

Kat: You're late, Gintoki!

Kat: If this were back during the Joi w*r,

Kat: our troops might've been left in disarray

Kat: and suffered massive losses because of you.

Sak: Don't be a stick in the mud!

Sak: You know Kintoki isn't the kind of man who'd let military rules bind him.

Reunion,Sign: Joi Rebels Reunion

Sak: Did you forget how uncooperative he was, always going off on his own,

Sak: running wild and launching surprise att*cks and whatnot?

Reunion,Sign: Joi Rebels Reunion

Kat: I couldn't forget, even if I wanted to.

Kat: We were the ones who always had to clean up after his messes, after all.

Sak: That's right.

Sak: Takes you back, doesn't it?

Kat: Yeah, those were the days.

Kat: Thinking back, it was ten years ago...

Title: Arriving Late to a Reunion Makes it Hard to Enter

Kat: Wait a second!

Kat: Wait a second!

Sak: Why not take a trip down memory lane?

Kat: Don't you get it?

Kat: The three of us don't get together very often!

Kat: It's a rare case!

Kat: It's a reunion!

Kat: Shouldn't you be overcome with joy?

Gin: Like hell I'd feel any of that.

Gin: I've had enough of seeing your mugs in the openings and endings.

Gin: You show up every episode, even though you're irrelevant.

Gin: I'm sick of it.

Gin: Nobody needs any more merch of you morons.

Sak: You didn't have to say it like that!

Sak: I may show up in the OPs/EDs,

Sak: but I don't get any actual screen time at all!

Sak: I'm getting the "Hoshi Ittetsu flips the table" treatment,

Sak: which only happens a handful of times in the actual episodes!

Gin: I only came here 'cause you said there was something important to discuss.

Gin: I don't have time to waste on you two goofs.

Sak: Chill out, Kintoki.

Sak: Drink up.

Gin: I'm not Kintoki, damn it.

Kat: There is but one reason I called all us former comrades here.

Kat: The anime has successfully resumed a second time,

Kat: and it's been released on Blu-ray.

Kat: There couldn't be a more perfect time.

Gin: For what?

Kat: Isn't it high time

Kat: we started a flashback arc?

Gin: Is this a scenario meeting?!

Kat: Don't you think we need fresh developments now, more than ever?

Gin: Who are you to be worrying about that?!

Kat: You must know this, too.

Kat: Using flashback arcs to give Jump anime second winds is almost standard procedure.

Kat: Countless series in the past

Kat: have used flashback arcs as a trigger

Kat: to move on to even greater heights of popularity.

Kat: And when do we want that second wind?

Sak: W...

Sak: Was there a mosquito flying around just now?

Gin: Not "we want it now"?!

Gin: Also, that's old!

Gin: Who'd want to watch such an obviously calculated flashback arc?

Gin: First of all,

Gin: nobody cares about the past or future of you idiots.

Gin: You've always been idiots, and you always will be.

Gin: Besides, I hate looking back on the past.

Gin: Even in reunions...

Kat: And dude,

Kat: I'd always finish my lunch in the morning self-study period.

Sak: Oh, man, I remember that!

Sak: And then, during lunch break, we'd rob everyone of their side dishes!

Kat: We did the stupidest things back then!

Gin: The guys who didn't amount to much in life

Gin: are always the ones making the most noise reminiscing about the past.

Gin: Especially the delinquents!

Sak: Are you calling me loud?

Sak: Can you blame me?!

Sak: The past is the only time I ever get to appear!

Kat: Stop that, you two.

Kat: Gintoki, it's because you're always like that

Kat: that nothing about our past has been revealed yet.

Kat: Even if you don't care,

Kat: and even if the gorilla mangaka hasn't thought of anything,

Kat: we will enter a flashback arc today.

Kat: No, we have to.

Gin: "It's been a while.

Gin: Are you doing well?

Gin: Actually, I'm in Edo right now.

Gin: If you'd like, why don't we get the g*ng back together

Gin: for a drink or two?"

Kat: To tell you the truth, we weren't the ones

Kat: who arranged this mini-reunion of Joi rebels.

Kat: Our former comrade, the one who sent that letter, is the organizer.

Gin: Who is this?

Gin: I don't remember.

Kat: So you don't remember him, either.

Kat: In the Joi w*r,

Kat: an era when every man fought for his country,

Kat: when every man was a hero,

Kat: the ones who survived through sheer devil's luck

Kat: and left their names in the history books were...

Kat: The White Yaksha, Sakata Gintoki.

Rebel R,Kat: The White Yaksha

Rebel L,Kat: Sakata Gintoki

Kat: The Rampaging Noble, Katsura Kotaro.

Rebel R,Kat: The Rampaging Noble

Rebel L,Kat: Katsura Kotaro

Kat: The Kiheitai Commander, Takasugi Shinsuke.

Rebel R,Kat: The Kiheitai Commander

Rebel L,Kat: Takasugi Shinsuke

Kat: The Loud Fellow, Sakamoto Tatsuma.

Rebel R,Kat: The Loud Fellow

Rebel L,Kat: Sakamoto Tatsuma

Sak: That's weird!

Sak: One of those is not like the others!

Sak: These four men would later

Sak: come to be known as the "Generation of Miracles."

Gin: I don't remember ever being called that!

Kat: However, it was only by luck that our names were recorded in history.

Kat: In truth,

Kat: there was another hero.

Kat: In our shadows was a man who fought to keep the battle in our favor,

Kat: a key figure who assisted us from behind the scenes.

Kat: A nameless hero unbeknownst to all.

Kat: And indeed, the organizer of this reunion:

Kurokono,Sign: Kurokono Tasuke

Phantom R,Kat: The Phantom Fifth Man

Kat: The Phantom Fifth Man, Kurokono Tasuke.

Phantom L,Kat: Kurokono Tasuke

Gin: Hold it right there!

Gin: I've never heard of that guy!

Gin: Actually, I have, but in another anime!

Kat: I see.

Kat: Kurokono Tasuke is a man of legendary status.

Kat: It wouldn't surprise me if someone made an anime ripping him off.

Kurokono,Sign: Kurokono Tasuke

Gin: We're the ones doing the ripping off!

Sak: Actually, I'm the same as you. I can't even remember his face.

Sak: After all, he was a man who worked exclusively behind the scenes.

Sak: I retain no impression of the kind of man he was

Sak: or the kind of stuff he did.

Sak: What a guy.

Gin: What part of that makes him a hero?!

Gin: If anything, his lack of presence is what's heroic!

Sak: But considering he called us to a reunion,

Sak: we'd better remember something about him or things will get awkward.

Sak: As such,

Sak: let's plunge into a flashback arc before he shows up and see if we recall anything.

Reunion,Sign: Joi Rebels Reunion

Gin: We're entering a flashback just so we have something to talk about at this reunion?!

Gin: What kind of setup is that?!

Gin: Did this guy even exist in the first place?!

Kat: He did.

Kat: Kurokono certainly did stand on the same b*ttlefield as we did.

Kat: He was a master of assists.

Kat: Given the way he worked,

Kat: if we think back to incidents where we got help at the perfect time,

Kat: we should be able to remember.

Kat: Oh?

Kat: Something's coming to me!

Kat: I'm starting to remember...

Sak: Really, Zura?

Kat: I believe that was...

Kat: Right, it was at the height of the Joi w*r.

Kat: During a match with the powerhouse Joi High, with the Inter-High victory at stake.

Gin: No way that's right!

Gin: Why were you playing basketball?!

Kat: I wasn't.

Kat: Back then, I'd ignored the coach's repeated orders to cut my long hair,

Kat: and had been benched as punishment.

Gin: That wasn't my point!

Gin: I'm asking you when you had the time to play basketball!

Kat: Long-haired and powerless, all I could do was

Kat: cheer my teammates on from the sidelines.

Gin: Just cut your damn hair!

Gin: Actually, go fight in the w*r!

Kat: I was so powerless, I chilled my Pokari to the point that it froze,

Kat: leaving me unable to even quench my thirst.

Gin: For a benchwarmer, why were you so enthusiastic about chilling your Pokari?!

Gin: Thought you were on a picnic?!

Kat: With my throat parched and my body and soul worn out,

Kat: I thought I was done for.

Kat: But that's when...

Kur: Want some?

Kat: The man who, by a misdirection,

Kat: to assist me with a Pokari perfectly chilled to a sherbet state...

Kat: was Kurokono Tasuke.

Gin: You call that an assist?!

Gin: I'm willing to overlook the basketball,

Gin: but at least make him assist you on the court!

Kat: That Pokari tasted especially divine.

Gin: All you did was drink Pokari on the bench!

Gin: You call that a flashback arc?!

Kat: No, it wasn't just the Pokari.

Kat: Like I said, he was a master of assists.

Kat: I remember him being louder than others while cheering, too.

Sak: Louder?

Sak: Rebound!

Sak: Nice shot!

Sak: Zura, that was me.

Kat: Huh? Is that so?

Gin: Why were you in the basketball game, too?!

Sak: Oh, that wasn't during the Joi w*r.

Sak: The w*r had ended and people were feeling down,

Sak: so we decided to play basketball for a change of pace.

Gin: You guys were doing stupid crap like that when everything was in tatters?!

Sak: That aside, I'm pretty sure Kurokono...

Kat: Did you remember something?

Sak: Right.

Sak: It was at the height of the Joi w*r.

Use,Sign: In Use

Sak: Back then, I was desperately trying to remove the aliens from the interior ministry.

Gin: What kind of Joi w*r is that?!

Sak: I was young and stupid.

Sak: I hadn't realized

Sak: that starting wars was easy, but cleaning up the mess was much harder.

Gin: Hey!

Gin: Why are you making such a big deal over the lack of toilet paper?!

Sak: I'd mouthed off about rebuilding the country, but I lacked the means to do so.

Sak: My foolishness had left me in despair, but that's when...

Sak: I saw it.

Sak: It felt like everything had been washed anew.

Gin: Pokari again?!

Gin: You've been talking about nothing but Pokari the entire time!

Gin: Don't tell me you used that to wash!

Gin: You used Pokari?!

Sak: Oh, that's right.

Sak: While I was in the bathroom,

Sak: I passed by a man.

Sak: That must've been...

Gin: It's just Zura from before!

Sak: Oh, so that Pokari really was yours?

Kat: Yeah.

Kat: I'd drunk too much chilled Pokari and upset my stomach.

Sak: Ah. That's one mystery solved.

Gin: What happened to Kurokono?!

Gin: Forget about basketball and Pokari!

Gin: Don't you have any memories of being saved on the b*ttlefield?!

Kat: On the b*ttlefield?

Kat: Oh, there was that one time!

Kat: Don't you remember it, too?

Kat: The rearguard battle on Mt. Eiroku!

Kat: As our forces numbering less than took on the Bakufu army a thousand strong,

Kat: we received information that , Amanto were marching toward our rear.

Kat: We were left with no option but to retreat,

Kat: and the unit Gintoki and I were in

Kat: was chosen as the rearguard to let the rest of us escape.

Kat: When we took up that responsibility, we were prepared to die.

Kat: I don't remember what happened after that very clearly.

Kat: I just cut down the enemies in front of me as I ran and ran.

Kat: Next thing I knew, I lay collapsed in the middle of the forest.

Kat: Having a parched throat felt strange.

Kat: Knowing I was breathing felt strange.

Kat: Shedding tears from my eyes felt strange.

Kat: But now I understand.

Kat: I was simply happy.

Kat: Happy that I'd managed to survive with my friend.

Kat: And that

Kat: Pokari was being sold there.

Gin: Where did the Pokari come from?!

Gin: Why is there a Pokari vending machine on the b*ttlefield?!

Gin: Did that really happen?!

Chill,Sign: Chilled

Gin: "Damn, what a ripoff,"

Kat: muttered Gintoki.

Gin: Muttered, my ass!

Gin: "I only have , yen,"

Kat: muttered Gintoki.

Gin: This is no time to be buying Pokari!

Gin: Run away!

Kat: "I have , . I'll get two bottles, so gimme that , .

Kat: You can pay me back the yen later,"

Kat: I muttered.

Gin: "But I paid for Yakulk the other day.

Gin: So , yen should be enough,"

Kat: muttered Gintoki.

Kat: "But Yakulk is yen for a five-pack, and I only got one of those.

Kat: divided by is yen, and , minus is , yen, right?"

Kat: I muttered.

Gin: "Does that include tax?"

Kat: muttered Gintoki.

Gin: Enough already! This is taking too long!

Kat: We decided that I'd pay there and Gintoki would pay me , yen once we got back,

Kat: but my condition took a turn for the worse once we got back to camp.

Gin: You're still going?!

Gin: How long is this story?!

Kat: With my consciousness gradually fading, I saw the faces of the men I'd protected.

Gin: Oh, so he'll show up now, right?

Gin: Kurokono Tasuke's finally gonna show up, right?!

Kat: I searched for the words to say to them,

Kat: but all I could manage was...

Kat: Gintoki made me pay him yen for a Yakulk the other day.

Kat: Did he make you guys pay, too? It wouldn't be fair if I was the only one who had to pay.

Gin: Enough about that already!

Sak: What?

Sak: He took yen from me. Did I only owe yen?

Gin: What the hell are you talking about in the middle of a w*r?!

Gin: What's going on?!

Kat: You were ripped off, Sakamoto!

Kat: Damn Gintoki.

Kat: He said he was treating us, but he intended to rip us off all along!

Gin: I have no idea what you're talking about!

Gin: I don't remember that at all!

Bo: You...

Gin: Oh, I see.

Gin: So the one who cleared my good name was Kurokono...

Tak: As if he'd ever do something like that.

Tak: I was the one who treated you to Yakulk.

Tak: He didn't pay for anything.

Gin: It was you?!

Kat: There you have it.

Kat: Gimme back my , yen.

Sak: Gimme back my yen.

Gin: This is the ending you arrived at?!

Gin: What about Kurokono?!

Bo: Just pay us back already!

Gin: Screw you!

Gin: I told you, I don't remember this!

Gin: As if he would treat anyone to Yakulk, anyway!

Gin: I'm done with this shitty reunion!

W: Excuse me, sirs.

W: Your friend has arrived.

All: H-He's here!

Gin: We haven't remembered a thing,

Gin: but Kurokono showed up at the reunion already!

Gin: I-I just remembered I had something to do.

Gin: I'll be back later.

Sak: Where do you think you're going, Kintoki?

Kat: We're not letting you get away!

Kat: The Pokari money...

Sak: The Yakulk money...

Kat: Gimme back my , yen!

Sak: Gimme back my yen!

Gin: That's what you're worried about?!

Gin: Who cares about that right now?!

Gin: Kurokono's almost here!

Gin: A really awkward reunion's about to begin!

Kat: We're not falling for that.

Sak: This has gone on for ten years. We're settling the score right now.

Gin: What kind of pathetic lives have you guys led for the past ten years?!

Tak: Talk about a rowdy reunion.

Tak: Relax.

Tak: Kurokono's not here yet.

Tak: For this reunion to begin,

Tak: and for you to welcome the phantom fifth man,

Tak: don't you think you're one member short?

Gin: Y-You're...

Kat: It can't be!

Tak: That's right.

Tak: I'll simply destroy

Hen: this awkward reunion.

Hen: Time out! I was kidding!

Hen: It's just a reunion joke!

Hen: Spare my shins, 'kay?

Gin: We stake our lives on our jokes, too.

Gin: Are you sure?

Gin: Are you okay with that being the last joke you ever tell?

Kat: Wait.

Kat: If memory serves, you're Takasugi's...

Kat: No, just a random lolicon—

Hen: I'm not a lolicon. I'm a feminist.

Hen: Actually, no.

Hen: I'm the Kiheitai's strategist, Takechi Henpeita.

Gin: Kihentai?! Did Takasugi send you to spy on us?!

Hen: I'm not a pervert. I'm a feminist.

Hen: Please wait.

Hen: While it's true that you and Shinsuke-dono are currently enemies,

Hen: our general is not boorish enough to ruin a gathering of his

Hen: former comrades over a personal grudge.

Hen: I'm merely here to relay a message from him.

Gin: Don't tell me he got invited to the reunion, too.

Gin: Nobody would talk to him even if he came!

Gin: He'd spend all night on his phone, and that'd be that!

Hen: He deeply regrets not being able to attend.

Hen: After all,

Hen: Shinsuke-dono and Kurokono-dono were so close,

Hen: it wouldn't be an exaggeration to call them best friends.

Gin: R-Really?

Gin: He had a best friend?

Hen: Knowing you all, he figured you wouldn't remember anything,

Hen: so he entrusted me with a letter.

Gin: A letter?

Sak: From him?

Kat: To us?

Hen: He hopes that it'll help jog your memories at least a little.

Gin: F-For real?

Gin: So he remembers Kurokono?

Sign: The Yakulk at this reunion's on me, too. Drink with Shirako all you want.

Tak: The Yakulk at this reunion's on me, too.

Tak: Drink with Shirako all you want.

Gin: Who the hell is Shirako?

Gin: He got his best friend's name all wrong!

Gin: Also, is he still holding a grudge over the Yakulk thing?

Gin: Did he really write this?!

Hen: Oops.

Hen: Sorry, wrong letter.

Gin: I knew it!

Gin: Takasugi would never write something like that!

Hen: If I recall correctly,

Hen: he couldn't attend the Kiheitai's New Year's bash,

Hen: so he sent this letter along with tons of Yakulk and shirako roe.

Gin: So it was Takasugi?!

Gin: Even there, he's buying people Yakulk?!

Gin: He's become a Yakulk character with that face?!

Gin: No way!

Hen: My apologies.

Hen: There's indeed no way Shinsuke-dono would write something like this.

Hen: This is the actual letter.

Sign: There's Yakulk in the fridge. Please save one for me.

Tak: There's Yakulk in the fridge.

Tak: Please save one for me.

Gin: Nothing's changed!

Gin: Forget Kurokono, he's talking about nothing but Yakulk now!

Gin: This is a joke, right?

Gin: Tell me it's all a joke, Barney!

Hen: Oops. Wrong letter.

Hen: I think this is the note he left the Kiheitai

Hen: when he had to travel for a few days recently.

Gin: Deny that Takasugi wrote this!

Gin: You okay with this? You're okay with this guy being your general?

Hen: My apologies. This one really is the actual letter.

Note Center,Sign: Rest in peace, my comrade

Tak: Rest in peace, my comrade.

Hen: I shall take my leave now, then.

Gin: I-I have no idea what this is supposed to mean!

Gin: Pokari and

Gin: "rest in peace"?

Gin: What does it mean ?!

Gin: All he's done is make things more complicated!

Gin: Would he give it a rest with his pretentious bullshit already?!

Sak: Wait, Kintoki.

Sak: This Pokari...

Sak: I... I see.

Sak: Whenever Zura and I tried to remember Kurokono,

Sak: we kept getting distracted by Pokari, but...

Kat: We weren't on the wrong track!

Kat: Our past with Kurokono really was linked...

Bo: ...to this Pokari.

Gin: What're you talking about?

Gin: Don't tell me, you remembered everything?

Gin: Thanks to this Pokari?

Gin: You've gotta be kidding me.

Gin: How could this...

Preview,Sign: Preview

Kat: Next week, the game with Joi High finally reaches its conclusion!

Gin: Die.

Kat: Takasugi's Emperor Eye activates!

Gin: Drop dead!

Sak: Wasn't it Emperor's Sty?

Gin: Shut it!

Sign: A Reunion Also Brings to the Surface Things You Don't Want to Remember

Gin: Next Episode:

Gin: "A Reunion Also Brings to the Surface Things You Don't Want to Remember."

text r: Next episode, the Generation of Miracles'

text l: past is revealed, and...

text r: Having taken his sweet time,

text l: Kurokono Tasuke arrives!