04x09 - The Queen of Soul

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Murphy Brown". Aired: November 14, 1988 – May 18, 1998.*
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Murphy Brown is the star reporter of "FYI," a newsmagazine series.
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04x09 - The Queen of Soul

Post by bunniefuu »

(Phone ringing)

That's okay.

I'll get it.

Murphy Brown here.

Are you sure?

Absolutely positive?

This is fantastic!

Thank you.

Yes! I've got it--

The interview that was
impossible to get.

Come on, guys.
Guess who it is.

Murphy, will you, please?

We're busy people trying to put
together an important news show.

I didn't graduate
cum laude from Harvard

To sit around playing questions.
Is it Marlon Brando?

No. Okay, I'll give you some clues.

Royalty. Come on, Jim.

You can get this.
Royalty. Royalty.

Royalty, fine.

King Tut.

You said it was an
impossible interview to get.

Queen Elizabeth.

Princess Margaret?

No.

Okay, clue number two-- Detroit.

It isn't that guy on Michigan TV

who calls himself
the king of gas barbecues, is it?

Yes, Frank,
That's why I'm so excited.

I finally got Roy from Butane
World as my guest.

Princess Di!

Prince Charles!

That kid,
what's his name?

Little Prince Chucky!

Rex Harrison,
Harrison Ford,
Betty Ford.

Shut up!
Shut up!

Peewee Herman?

Geez, what is with you guys?

Detroit royalty.

The Queen of Soul.

It's Aretha.

Aretha Franklin.

You got Aretha?

Get out of here.
No way.

There's just one slight problem.

Aretha's such a full interview.

I don't see how I can fit it

Into our
usual -minute segment.

Oh, boy. Here we go again.

Forget it, Murph. I am not cutting
down another one of my interviews

just because you can't work
within the time frame of the show.

That's right.

You always do this.

The show is called FYI.

Not Murphy Brown

and some other people
who aren't that important.

Now, let's be reasonable here.

The only thing
Murphy is asking for ...

I don't believe this.

He's going to do it.
You're going to do it.

Frank,
would you put yourself

in my place
for one minute?

On the one hand,
I've got Aretha Franklin

and a possible share.

On the other hand,

my highly paid news
team's hurt feelings.

Whoa!

So how much time
do you need, Murphy?

Oh, hardly anything at all.

five or six minutes
do it... from each of you.

Are you out of your mind?

Miles.

May I remind you

That our new segment
"The World According To Dial"

premieres
on this week's show?

Are you saying that
you're going to cut it just
to satisfy the glutinous whim

of miss gimme,
gimme, gimme?

Come on now, people.

Let's see a little
teamwork here.

I'm sure if the tables
were turned

And you one of you
came to Murphy for time

She'd give it to you.
Wouldn't you, Murphy?

Oh, yeah.
That'll happen.

John:
Two minutes to air, people.

Miles, I got Derek,
our driver, on the phone.

Aretha's train was delayed
two hours outside of Toledo,

but it's definitely due
to arrive any minute.

Let me talk to him.

Miles Silverberg wants
to talk to you.

Small, glasses.

Are you the same guy
he drove to the urologist?

Give me that!

We go live

In a little
over one minute.

I know! I know!

Derek, I want you to call the second
Miss Franklin's train pulls in.

Don't wait for her luggage.

It did? Great!

Get her and bring her ASAP!

Listen up, people.

Aretha's train has arrived,
and she's on her way.

(cheering)

Of course, she's on her way.

Why wouldn't she be on her way?

She's the Queen of Soul,
for God sakes.

Okay, okay,
here's the plan.

Since we go live in...

seconds!

Instead of Murphy's interview
opening the show

First up will be Frank's.

That will Aretha plenty
of time to get here.

Places, everyone.

This is it, Frank.

Leading off
an historic show--

The segment before Aretha--
Quite an honor for you.

Don't you talk to me.

Because of you, my story
is a crummy ½ minutes long.

Be quiet, Frank.
I have to breathe now.
And I need to ask Murphy

if it's all right to use
my share of the oxygen.

Can you believe this, Jim?

My big moment

and these guys can't let go
of their petty grudges.

Tell it to somebody who
gives a rodent's behind.

Places.

Going live in five...

four...

three...

two...

Good evening,
and welcome to FYI.

For your information tonight,
we have a very special program

That's caused a lot
of excitement

around here this week.

Thank you, Frank.

For that astonishing,
albeit very brief look

at the devastating scare
inflicted by a madman.

Hey, hey--
My pleasure.

They should have been
here by now.

Frank, although
it wasn't covered

In your edited piece

I understand while in Kuwait
you spent time

with that legendary
oil-fire fighter Red Adair.

Uh-huh.

Must have been pretty exciting.

Oh, yeah.

Frank, why don't you
tell us about it?

You had to be there.

Okay, stay tuned.

We'll be back
after this message.

Commercial!
Go to commercial!

And we're clear.

Hello.

Derek, where are you?

Vermont Avenue?!

Vermont Avenue?
What's he doing that far north?

He was forced into a detour.

The sewer lines in front of
the Senate exploded again.

Derek, we're counting on you!

He can have her here
in eight minutes.

Eight minutes?!
I can't keep yammering
with Frank for eight more minutes.

You see the state he's in.

I looked into his eyes.

There was something cold
and dead in there.

Jim, you don't have to stall.

When we come out of commercial,
we'll go to Corky's piece.

Yes, Corky's piece.
That will give Aretha
plenty of time to get here.

So it will all work out fine.

All right, coming back from commercial

in five...

four...

three...

two...

Welcome back.

Now Corky Sherwood-Forrest
takes us

on a behind-the-scenes glimpse

at a museum dedicated to a man

who literally changed
the face of Hollywood.

Movie makeup artist Max Factor.

Corky?
Thank you, Jim.

It all began in a little town in Russia

for a boy who had a vision, a dream

and a family full of amazingly
unattractive women.

At out last stop on the tour,
the Max Factor boutique,

it's comforting to know

that while the man himself
may be gone,

(cash register rings)

...his wide variety of fine skin
and hair products live on.

Excuse me.
I think I gave you a .

For FYI,

This is Corky Sherwood-Forrest
reporting.

Thank you, Corky.
...for that.

Corky, in watching
your segment

I couldn't help
but wonder...

Max.

Is that short for anything?

Maxwell
or Maximilian?

No, Jim.

Ah.

So then, it's just...
Max.

Not Maxwell
or Maximilian?

Max.

You also mentioned that
Mr. Factor is the father

of the human-hair wig.

How did that
innovation come about?

Well, I'm not really sure, Jim.

You see, I wasn't able

to get into as much detail
on my story

As I would have liked.

But...

But I did learn something
about makeup theory.

One mistake women make

is that they use
too much concealer.

As a result, it builds
in their facial creases--

Especially around the eyes.

Around the eyes, you say?

Maybe there's a better way
to illustrate this.

Carl, give us
a tight closeup on Murphy.

You see, this is what
I'm talking about.

Notice the area most
commonly referred to

as the crow's feet.

Murphy: Fascinating.

Now it's time
for a new segment on FYI

Jim dial's in-depth commentary

on the times in which we live,
"The World According to Dial."

Jim?

Yes, well...

Thank you, Murphy.

My commentary tonight is
on the Pentagon budget.

They spend too much.

And they should stop.

I'll tell you why, next week.

When I have more time.

We'll be back

after this message.

And we're clear.

Take cover, everybody.

What were you doing

Telling Carl to zoom in
on my face like that?!

What were you doing introducing
my commentary? My commentary was ...

(all arguing loudly)

Shut up! Shut up!

Hello!
Derek, where are you?!

Chinatown! How did you get
way over there?

No, no, don't waste
any time telling me!

You just get her here!
You hear me.

I don't care how you do it!

You just...

He's minutes away.

And I've got minutes
of show to fill!

We're dead.

We're not dead, Miles.

All we have to do
is stretch a little more.

Oh, yes. It's so easy, when you're not
the one doing the stretching.

I've used every word
in the English language

except "lavaliere."

Turn the camera on me!

I'm ready to go.

Lavaliere! Lavaliere!

seconds!

Fine.

I'll just stretch by myself.

You may want to
take notes.

You're about to watch
a professional journalist

at work in the face of a crisis.

Go, babe!

Carl...

Coming back live

in five...

four...

three...

two...

Welcome back.

And in our final segment tonight,

Murphy Brown brings us...

Something I can
hardly wait to see.

Murphy?

Thank you, Jim.

Respect.
That's what it's all about.

Whether my guest tonight
got her first taste of it

as a little girl
singing in her father's gospel choir

or by a remarkable
recording career

that made her the
undisputed Queen of Soul

One thing's for certain--

She's earned her share of it.

I'm talking, of course,
about Aretha Franklin.

But before Aretha joins us,

I'd like to share
some personal things

about the woman

and her music.

of which there is

so much.

Let me start with my
favorite song--

"Respect."

Of course, she's
had so many hits--

"Natural Woman,"
"Chain of Fools"

"Baby, I Love You"

But given the unfortunate
time restraints of television,

it would be impossible
for me to list them all.

"Spanish Harlem"
"Day Dreaming"

And "Rock Steady."

Well, how about that?

I guess I could name them all.

I only wonder
which of these classics

When she joins us tonight.

And she will be joining us...

But first,
I'd like to let you know

Where it all happens--
The piano--

The conduit through which

Miss Franklin's
message is delivered.

Yes, the piano.

A Steinway grand.
"The professional's choice."

The professional in this instance

Being one Miss Aretha Franklin.

The piano, this particular one--

Black, with, um...

keys--

One, two, three, four...

Well, I'm sure
they're all there.

"Ebony and Ivory."

She didn't write that.

But I'm sure she could
sing the hell out of it.

Did I mention that
Aretha's won more Grammys

than any other female vocalist?

Well, I think
it bears repeating.

Aretha's won more Grammys
than any other female vocalist.

So, if I understand correctly,

Your intense drive
to succeed in show business

was the result of a deep need
for a father's affection.

Yep.

Even as a child
I'd go into the woods with a little
mm camera

And take movies
of the deer and elk

Goring each other
with their antlers.

My dad went crazy
over that stuff.

I remember, one summer vacation

We went up
to cougar country

With ten pounds
of raw meat...

Gee, Carl,

I see we're getting the cue
to wrap it all up.

I guess that means
the show's over.

How did that happen?

Well, I guess
it's back to you, Jim.

My, where did the time go?

Our apologies to Aretha
that we ran out of time.

We hope she can come back
again soon.

We sincerely hope that
you'll come back again, too.

For all of us here are FYI,
this is Jim Dial.

Good night.

John:
And we're clear.

Well, that
wasn't too bad.

We still managed
to fill up the whole hour.

I think the network
will give us credit for that.

Who am I kidding?

We're dead.

They'll take away my key
to the executive washroom.

The faucets turned on
by themselves, John.

I'll never see that again.

Corky:
Murphy...

Before the show
we were all so upset

we were hoping something really
awful would happen to you.

You know...

Like your hair
collapsing on air.

Or a pit bull
getting in to the studio

and attacking you.

Or... what was yours, Frank?

Spontaneous combustion.

In our wildest fantasies,

we didn't want you
to suffer like this.

And...

If you need us,
we're here for you.

See, it's always been
a life-long dream

to interview Aretha.

I really would have needed
the extra time.

(strikes piano key)

(Murphy strikes piano keys)

woman:
I once saw a chicken do that

at the county fair.

Aretha.

I guess I missed the show, huh?

Only by a little bit.

God, I can't believe
you're standing here.

Oh, me either.

hours on the train.

And then we drove around
in circles for hours.

I can relate.

You wouldn't believe what the
last hour of my life has been like.

Yes, I could.

I saw it on TV in the
back of the limo.

I haven't seen anything
that embarrassing

since a moth flew

in my mouth at
the Hollywood Bowl.

Well, tonight was bad all right.

But you know, the humiliation
wasn't the worst part.

It was that I missed the chance


to be two feet away from you
when you sang.

I always wanted that.

The closest I ever came

was section row D
at R.F.K. Stadium.

You know, I realize that

I'm not the biggest audience
you've ever played for, but...

I'd sure be
the most appreciative.

Okay.

Scoot over.

(playing chords)

Oh, a Steinway.

Professional's choice.

(soft, slow, blues music)

♪♪ Looking out ♪♪

♪♪ On the morning rain ♪♪

♪♪ I used to feel
so uninspired ♪♪

♪♪ And when I knew ♪♪

♪♪ Ooh, I had to
face another day ♪♪

♪♪ Lord, it made me feel
so tired ♪♪

♪♪ Before the day I met you ♪♪

♪♪ Life was so unkind ♪♪

♪♪ But you're the key
to my peace of mind ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause you make me feel ♪♪

♪♪ You make... ♪♪
(off-key:)
♪♪ You make me... ♪♪

(music stops)

Now, listen.

Let's get
one thing straight.

I'm not Martha
and you ain't no Vandella.

You sing alone.

Yeah, right, I'm a solo act.

Okay, got it.

♪♪ And when my soul
was in the lost and found ♪♪

(barking:)
♪♪ Ah-ooh ♪♪

♪♪ Ah-ooh, ah-ooh, ah-ooh ♪♪

♪♪ A mighty good man came along
to claim it ♪♪

♪♪ Ah-ooh ♪♪

♪♪ And when I... ♪♪

♪♪ I didn't know
what was wrong with me ♪♪

♪♪ Ah-ooh ♪♪

Ooh.

♪♪ Until your kiss
helped me name it ♪♪

♪♪ Now I'm no longer doubtful ♪♪

♪♪ Of what I'm livin' for ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause if I make you happy ♪♪

♪♪ I don't ...
I don't need to do more ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause you make me feel ♪♪

♪♪ You make me feel ♪♪

Your self-control
was much better that time.

♪♪ You make me feel
like a natural woman ♪♪

Go ahead and sing.

I know it's k*lling you.

Go ahead.

♪♪ Oh, baby,
what you done to me ♪♪

(Off-key:)
♪♪ Done to me ♪♪

♪♪ You made me feel
so good inside ♪♪

♪♪ Good inside ♪♪

♪♪ And I, ohh, ohh,
just want to be ♪♪

(high off-key note:)
♪♪ I just want to be ♪♪

♪♪ Next to you ♪♪

♪♪ You make me feel
so alive ♪♪

Hit it, girl.

♪♪ You make me feel ♪♪

♪♪ You make me feel ♪♪

♪♪ You make me feel ♪♪

♪♪ Yeah, you do ♪♪

♪♪ Uh-huh ♪♪

♪♪ You make
me feel a na-tu-ral... ♪♪

♪♪ Wo... ♪♪

(running notes:)
♪♪ Wo-o-o-o-o-o-o ♪♪

♪♪ O-o... ♪♪

♪♪ Ma-a-a-a ♪♪

♪♪ an. ♪♪

Girlfriend,
you deserve those Emmys

Every one that you got.

But don't show up
at the Grammys.

Please.
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