06x29 - Fountain of Youth/Bad Luck Cabin/Uncle Daddy

[bunniefuu]

[Theme music]

Theme song: Love,
exciting and new.

Come aboard.

We're expecting you.

And love, life's
sweetest reward.

Let it flow.

It floats back to you.

The love boat soon will
be making another run.

The love boat promises
something for everyone.

Set a course for adventure,
your mind on a new romance.

And love won't hurt anymore.

It's an open smile
on a friendly shore.

It's love.

Welcome aboard, it's love.

Oh, grandpa, this
cruise is a great idea.

How could I ever thank you?

Well, you could start by
slowing down to a gallop.

Hi.

Vicki: Hi.

This is Mr. Dwight
scoffield, and i'm

his granddaughter Stacy.

Welcome aboard.

I'm Vicki stubing.

Let's see, Mr. Scoffield.

Uh, you are in the vip suite.

And Sandy, you're right next
door in the executive suite.

Two best cabins on the ship.

Sounds great.

Uh, if there's
anything you need,

our staff would be
very happy to help you.

Well, you can tell
your staff that just

because we're in the
two finest suites

doesn't mean I'm a big tipper.

Now, where are our cabins,
or do we have to guess?

Sir, they're right up
these stairs and to the left.

Young lady, those
may look like stairs

to you, but at my age
they look more like mt.

Everest.

Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Scoffield.

You can use the elevator.

It's right over there on
the other side of the lobby.

Enjoy your cruise.

Thank you, Vicki.

Grandpa, I'm going up
to check out my cabin.

I'll see you later, ok?
- Ok.

Ok.

Uh, excuse me.

Could you tell me how to
get to the aloha deck?

I'm having some trouble
finding my way around.

Well, I'm having
problems of my own--

I don't believe it.

But I really am
having trouble.

Young man, do you have a
grandfather named Henry Harper?

No.

Why?

It's amazing.

You're the spitting image of
a man I went to college with.

His name was Henry Harper.

Dwight?

Oh, my-- Dwight scoffield,
is it really you?

Yeah.

Why-- why do you ask?

Because, old friend,
I am Henry Harper.

What!

Listen, I'll
this luggage and I'll

meet you up in the
lido deck in minutes

to tell you all about it.

It can't be.

Oh!

I love you, I love
you, I love you.

Multiply that by a
million times and that's

how much I love you.

[Clearing throat]

Oh.

Hi.

Uh, we're ed and Cora winnaker.

Um-- oh, gosh.

The honeymoon couple?

How did you know?

Well, welcome aboard.

I'm sure you're anxious
to go to your cabin.

It's so much fun unpacking.

You're on the fiesta
deck, cabin .

Thanks.

Thank you.

Are you out of your mind?

Do you realize
what you just did?

You sent a honeymoon
couple to fiesta !

So?

So that's a jinxed cabin.

It's bad luck!

Look, every honeymoon
couple that has ever checked

into that room has split up.

Bobby!

Isaac!

Ha-ha!

Ok, give me a hug.
Good one.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All right.

And five, show me five.

Hey, hey, ah.

I wish you two would try
and get along a little better.

How you doing?

Good, good.

Oh, uh, sir.

I'd like you to meet Gayle
Davis and my main man Bobby.

Welcome aboard.

Heard a lot of nice
things about you two.

We've heard a lot of nice
things about you too, captain.

I hope it was good.

Uh, maybe I better
show you to your cabin

before you get me fired.

Oh, and this is for you.

You can open it later.

Or now.

Oh boy!

Robin hood!

Yeah.

Oh, listen.

Come on, I want to show
you some other stuff.

Bobby was only kidding.

Truth is, Isaac
is always telling

us how terrific you are.

Well, I think Isaac
is pretty terrific too.

I completely agree.

I better.

I'm planning on spending the
rest of my life with him.

[Horn blowing]

[Excited chatter]

[Music playing]

You kiss terrifically.

Mm.

You led, I merely followed.

[Knocking]

Both: Hi!
- Hi.

Come on in.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Well.

Gee, I hope we're not
disturbing anything.

Nothing that can't
be continued later.

Ah, good.

Because we wanted to present
you with this champagne,

compliments of the crew.

Oh, thank you.

Isn't that nice?

Well, are you happy
with your cabin?

Is everything honeymoon perfect?

Couldn't be better.

Oh, ed, it's our
honeymoon and we forgot

the most important thing.

Uh, we can do it later, honey,
after gopher and Julie leave.

I meant the threshold.

You forgot to carry the
bride over the threshold.

Well, why don't we take
care of that right now?

Yes, sir.

One threshold coming
right up here.

Both: [Humming "here comes the
bride"]

And here we go!

[Dress tearing]

Oh!

Oh, ed.

That's my wedding dress.

I didn't tear it
on purpose, honey.

Ed, how could
you be so clumsy?

I couldn't help it.

You're heavier
than I remembered.

[Music playing]

Now, Dwight, I know it must
come as quite a shock to you,

but goldarn it, I really am
your old classmate Henry Harper.

How could that be?

Henry Harper must be
years old by now.

last march.

I celebrated by hang
gliding in Honolulu.

That's preposterous.

Oh, not really.

No more preposterous
than the time

you shimmied up the flagpole
and swore you wouldn't come

down if hoover were re-elected.

Or the time that
you told Elsa tuttle

that you were a close
friend of Rudy vallee's

just to get a date with her.

Or the time that you
tricked me into selling

you that property the day
before oil was discovered on it.

My god.

Could it be--

that was a dirty deal.

Hi, grandpa.

What's wrong?

You look like
you've seen a ghost.

That's close.

Well, if this is him, I can't
wait to go to the great beyond.

Well, thank you.

I think you're the
cat's pajamas too.

Uh, Henry Harper.

Uh, Stacy scoffield.

Would you care to
go for a swim, Stacy?

Sure.

You're gonna be
all right, grandpa?

Ok.

Let's go.

Holy cow.

They didn't make swimming suits
like that when we were young.

Hello, Isaac.

Hi, captain.

Can I have something
to drink, please?

Sure, my assistant will
be glad to take care of you.

He handles only soft drinks.

What assistant?

I'll need to see
some ID first, please.

Young man, I am the captain.

Is he all right?

Mm-hm.

Ok, one Shirley temple.

My specialty.

Thank you, Bobby.

Mm.

That's delicious.

That's my boy.

When I grow up,
Isaac, I'm gonna

be a bartender just like you.

I thought you wanted to be
president of the United States?

That too.

Well, for now, how about
settling for a tour of the ship

like I promised you?
- Wow!

Really?
- Yeah.

I'll go tell mom.

Ok.

Mom, Isaac's off work now.

Well, I hope you didn't
bother him while he was working.

No, I helped him.

He says nobody makes
Shirley temples like me.

That's right, Gayle, nobody.

Listen, Bobby, are you
ready to go exploring?

Yeah.

Oh, just let me get my wrap.

Oh, no, Gayle, this
is just for Bobby.

I didn't want to
bother you with this.

Why don't you just stay
here and soak up the sun?

You sure you don't mind?

Not at all.

Well, I don't want
Bobby to wear you out.

Are you kidding?

The man of steel?

Tin foil.

Come on, Bobby.

[Music playing]

Ed, I'm sorry.

Cora, I can't imagine
how you can go into a shop

and pick this out of all the
outfits they have in there.

Julie, we've come up with a
new drink for Isaac to make.

It's called the Julie McCoy.

Ok, let's have it.

You take a happy couple and
you put them on the rocks.

Ha, ha, ha.

You guys just won't
let up, will you?

You're still stuck on
that bad luck cabin thing.

Well, see for yourself.

They've been going at it ever
since they came out here.

I think it's cute.

Cute?

It looks like something
out of a clown convention.

Ed, I think
you're overreacting.

[Laughing]

Are you satisfied?

People are laughing at me.

Ed, people were
laughing at your clothes

long before I met you.

Really?

If it wasn't for me, you'd
still be wearing nehru jackets.

While we're at
it, you wouldn't

exactly make the cover
of "vogue" in that rag

you're wearing.

Well, you may not
like your new deck suit,

but there's one
good thing about it.

What's that?

It's wash and wear.

[Music playing]

Oh, Henry, Henry.

There you are.

Well, dog my cats.

Dwight.

Could we speak privately?

Oh, sure.

Do you mind, sweet patootie?

I'll catch up to you later.

Ok, but someday you're
going to have to tell me

what language you're speaking.

See you later, grandpa.

What's up, Dwight?

Henry, I can't accept this.

It's impossible that
you are the Henry Harper

that I went to college with.

For the love of Mike, Dwight.

It's not only
possible, it's true.

But how?

I mean, uh, you haven't
aged a day in years.

And it can't be plastic surgery.

No.

Dwight, if I tell you a secret,
do you swear never to breathe

a word of it to anyone?

Oh, I swear.

Ok.

It all started in
right after I

went bankrupt-- thanks to you.

I was on a hiking trip through
the back country of Mexico.

While I was there,
I discovered a root.

Now, this root, if mixed
with certain ingredients,

forms the enzyme
that prevents aging.

Can such a thing exist?

Oh, yes.

Gerontologists have known for
years that the aging process

can be chemically halted.

They just haven't found
out how to do it yet.

And I have.

This root is the key to it.

I'm on my way to
get some more now.

Sounds impossible.

Yes, but it's true.

But think of it.

I mean, immortality.

Yeah.

Uh, Henry, if a person were
to, uh, pay you handsomely

for a little of this potion,
you'd sell it to him,

wouldn't you?

No, Dwight, it's not for sale.

Listen, I gotta go.

I don't want to keep that
little sheba of yours waiting

any longer.
- Oh, but--

I'll see you.

I-- uh--

[Music playing]

Would you please pass a roll?

I would, but I'm afraid you'd
be unhappy with my selection.

Look, it's ok.

I trust you-- on rolls.

[Laughing]

What's so funny?

Oh, you did look kind of
silly in that deck suit.

It wasn't really that bad.

Oh, no, it was
an awful choice.

You were right to be upset.

While we're being
honest, I thought

you looked beautiful in
that bathing suit you wore.

Really?

Then why'd you say what you did?

I don't know.

I don't know what's
going on with us.

You're right.

We never fought
this much before.

I don't understand it.

Well, we've both been
under a lot of tension

with the wedding and all.

You know, suddenly I don't
feel so hungry anymore.

That's strange.

Neither do I.

Cora, ed.

Uh, if you're not
happy with your cabin,

we do have another
one available.

And it's perfect
for honeymoon couples.

- Uh-huh.
- No thanks.

Our honeymoon couldn't
be any more perfect.

Excuse us.

Well, gopher.

I'm not the type to
say I told you so,

but I am the type to say--

[laughing]

Mm.

Dwight, this steak
is the bee's knees.

You really oughta try some.

No.

I can't.

Grandpa has to be
careful about what he eats.

The doctor's put him
on a very strict diet.

Hmm.

I'm not allowed
anything with taste.

That's too bad.

Because I find eating
to be one of the truly

great pleasures of life.

Anyone for more giggle water?

Oh, I forgot.

You don't drink
anymore either, do you?

Well, I certainly do.

Even if champagne does
get me a little dizzy.

Oh, not too dizzy
for dancing, I hope.

I do a mean two-step.

Sounds like fun.

Yes.

Oh, grandpa, why
don't you come with us?

No.

The only dancing an old man
like me does is in his dreams.

Oh, thank you, John.

Doc, have you seen
Isaac's new girlfriend yet?

Not unless she's
very short and answers

to the name of Bobby.

He has been spending a lot
more time with little Bobby

than with his mother.

I just hope he realizes
you can't break up the set.

Well.

Are you sure you don't
mind tucking him in?

Are you kidding?
I'd love to.

Ok.

I'll see you later up on deck.

All right.

All right, time for inspection.

Let's check it out.

Did you wash behind your
teeth and brush your ears?

Isaac, it's the
other way around.

It is?

You mean I've been doing
it wrong all these years?

Come on, in the bed.

Listen, I'll read some "Robin
hood" to you, all right?

Why don't I read
to you instead?

When I was a little boy,
this was my favorite.

"The three bears"?

Mm-hm.

There's a baby bear, a mommy
bear, and a daddy bear.

And now mommy says i'm
going to have a daddy too.

You, Isaac.

She said that?

Uh-huh.

Bobby--

and she said that
you'd love me and take me

on picnics and to
baseball games and teach

me how to ride a horse.

You will, won't you?

You bet I will.

Thanks a lot, daddy.

[Laughing]

Hurry up and get the key.

I don't have the key.

You have it.

No, don't you remember, honey?

You took it when
we left for dinner.

Uh, no, you said you
were going to take it.

No, I never said that.

Yeah, sure you did.

You can never admit when
you're wrong, can you?

Well, of course I can.

When I'm wrong, I admit it.

But this time I'm not wrong.

And that's another thing.

You always have to get the
last word in, don't you?

No, I don't.

I think you do.

Don't.

You're doing it now.

This is crazy.

I'm going to find
someone to let us in.

Take your time.

[Music playing]

Stacy, I knew you were
beautiful, but in this dress

you're the nuts.

You know what I
love about you, Henry?

No, but come a little
closer before you tell me.

I don't want to miss a word.

I love how
old-fashioned you are.

It's almost as if you
belong in the past.

It's funny, because
when I think of you,

all I can think
about is the future.

Oh, hi, Cora.

Is everything ok?

Oh, of course.

It's my honeymoon, the
happiest time in a girl's life.

Oh, Cora, I think
you better sit down.

Oh, Julie.

I don't know what's
going on with ed and me.

I do.

I think maybe I'd better
take over now, Julie.

Yeah.

Cora, what i'm
going to tell you

is going to make you
feel a lot better.

Really?

What is it?

You and ed are cursed.

Come on, let's go
back to your cabin,

and I'll explain
the whole thing.

Come on.

You know, you've done
a great job of raising

that kid all by yourself.

It must have been rough.

Well, he was only a
baby when his father died,

so it's been rough on Bobby too.

Yeah.

You know, a kid his age
needs a man in his life.

So does a girl my age.

Oh, Isaac.

I never knew it
could be like this.

Oh.

I didn't either.

I had an absolutely
wonderful time tonight.

But right now there's
only one thing on my mind.

Making whoopee?

No.

Sleep.

If I had two things on my mind,
that just might be the other.

Ed: Are you telling me
that this cabin is haunted?

No, no, no, I
didn't say haunted.

I said cursed.

And not for everyone, just
for honeymoon couples.

That's us.

However, you guys are in luck.

Cabin just down the hall
here is open and available.

No thanks, gopher.

We'll stay right here.

Are you sure
about that, honey?

Quite sure.

Ok, if that's the
way you want it.

Goodnight.

Why did you tell
him we'd stay?

Oh, come on, Cora.

Don't tell me you believe in
that bad luck cabin stuff too.

Well, it does explain
why we've been fighting.

Don't you see?

It's the cabin, not us.

That's the stupidest
thing I've ever heard.

Are you calling me stupid?

No, not you.

Your ideas.

Same thing.

All right.

If I'm so stupid,
why did you marry me?

Well, I guess you don't have a
corner on the stupidity market.

Well, I'm about to say
something very smart.

Get out!

Ok, fine.

I'll be in if
anybody wants me.

Don't worry, nobody will.

Ed: Good riddance!

Henry, Henry, I've
got to talk to you.

Ok, sure.

Come on inside.

I'm gonna get
right to the point.

I'm tired of being an old man.

I want my body to
be young again.

Now, do you think
this potion of yours

will help me get that way?

Well, yes, but--

well, then give it to me.

Give it to me, for the sake
of all those good old days.

Huh?

[Laughing]

Dwight.

Not all of our old
days were so good.

Oh, still have a chip on your
shoulder, eh, about that land

you sold me.

Well, can't you let
bygones be bygones?

Dwight, I don't hold a grudge.

It's just-- well, I can't
just give you the serum.

I mean, do you realize that
every bottle I produce takes

two years of
painstaking lab work

and a great deal of expense.

Oh, don't worry
about the money.

I'm willing to pay you for it.

Well, it's probably a lot
more expensive than you think.

Oh, dammit, Henry.

I-- I'm desperate.

Now, just tell me how much it
costs and I'll pay you for it.

$ , .

Well, uh-- worth every cent.

Where's your pen?

Well, here you go.

Ha-ha-ha.

Whoa, easy.

That's very potent stuff.

Just two drops in your
orange juice every morning

and you'll begin to feel
like a young man again.

Friend to the end.

Well, goodnight, Dwight.

And, uh, again, good luck.

Here you go, grandpa.

It may have taken you
years, but you're

finally even with that crook.

[Music playing]

Isaac.

Captain.

Is everything all right?

Sir, how do you tell someone
who's serious about you

that you don't
feel the same way?

Gayle?

Yeah.

Well, if she's, uh, half
the woman I think she is,

she'll understand.

Yeah.

Thank you, sir.

Good luck.

Isaac.

There you are.

Hi, Gayle.

I thought we'd never be alone.

Listen, I want you
to know that I think

you are one terrific lady.

Well, I think you
are one terrific man.

Well.

Gayle.

I, uh-- no, we have--

Isaac, are you nervous?

I've never said
this to anyone before.

And you don't have to say
anything now, sweetheart.

I know what your
question is going to be,

and the answer is yes.

Gayle--

oh, Isaac.

I am going to make you
such a perfect wife.

And Bobby will be so happy
that he has a new father.

Yeah.

Bobby, uh-- he's
gonna be thrilled.

Oh, Isaac.

Oh!

[Music playing]

Merrill (on pa): Good
morning, and welcome

to beautiful mazatl n.

Whether you plan to lounge
on the beach or explore this

great old town, your
visit to mazatl n

should be a day to remember.

Hi.

Hello.

Hi.

I'm Laurie jeffers.

I've been told you usually
don't take passengers on here,

but if by chance you
had a cabin available?

Well, you're in luck.

Fiesta just opened up.

Didn't it, gopher?

Wrong, Julie.

Ed and Cora won't move.

However, uh, Laurie, we have
a super cabin, f , that I

think you'll like a lot better.

Fine.

I just want to get
down there and change

so I can go to work on my tan.

A good idea.

Right through those doors and
right around to your right.

Thank you.

Enjoy your cruise.

You told them about the curse
and they wouldn't leave?

Yeah.
I don't understand that.

To me, it's like
Daniel not wanting

to leave the lion's den.

Thanks for the shaving gear.

[Knocking]

Cora: Darling, it's me.

Can we talk?

Who are you?

Who are you?

[Gasping]

Oh!

Who are you?

I'm not sure, but I
think my name is mud.

Cora, please!

It's not what you think!

[Door slamming]

Could you open the door, please?

Cora: Go away!

I never want to see you again!

There's a logical
explanation for this--

I think.

[Knocking]

Would you let me in, please?

Leave me alone, you pervert!

Vicki (on pa):
Ladies and gentlemen,

a buffet brunch is now being
served on the starlight deck.

Come join us and get your
day off to a great start.

Here you go, champ.

I just squeezed that myself.

Good morning.

Beautiful day, isn't it?

Good morning, sir.

It certainly is.

Did you tell him?

Tell me what?

Go ahead, honey.

Oh, uh-- sir, Gayle and I,
we're going to get married.

You are?

Well, congratulations, Isaac.

I hope you'll be very happy.

Thank you, sir.

I'm happy now that I've
got Isaac for my daddy.

Well, best of
luck to all of you.

Excuse me.

Uh, sir.

I haven't told
anyone about this,

and, um, I'd appreciate
it if you didn't

say anything to the guys.

All right, Isaac.

Stacy.

Good morning.

Everything copacetic
with you today?

Wonderful, Henry.

But I have to confess,
I couldn't stop dreaming

about the two of us last night.

Hmm, must be something
in the pillows.

The same thing happened to me.

Good grief!

Would that be grandpa?

[Laughing]

I see it, but I
don't believe it.

Come on.

Well, everybody, meet Stacy.

She's my, uh-- ah-- uh--

close personal relative.

Hey, Henry, baby.

What's the action?

Grandpa, what's
happened to you?

Have you been drinking?

Only the spirit
of youth, my dear.

Give me that fast Lane and
fill my t*nk with high octane.

[Laughing]

Grandpa, can I talk
to you for a minute?

Well, all right, all right.

I'll be right back.

Don't anybody move.

Let's stay and practice.

Grandpa, I can not believe
you're carrying on like this.

Well, why not?

You wouldn't say anything
to Henry if he did it.

But you're years old.

So what?

Tell her how old you are, Henry.

Go ahead, tell her.

[Clears throat]

Uh-- Stacy, this
is going to be

a bit hard to believe,
but your grandfather

and I were school chums.

[Laughing]

Yeah, I am really years old.

That's ridiculous.

Why would you tell me
something like that?

Because it's true.

Grandpa, will you tell Henry
to cut this foolishness out?

Oh, I can't do that.

I was always taught
to respect my elders.

Look, Stacy, we've gotta
go take a little walk.

Uh-- a couple of
things you oughta know.

See, when I was a young
man back in the ' s--

[knocking]

Go away!

It's gopher.

Hi.

I figured you guys could
use a little bit of luck,

so I brought you
this rabbit's foot.

I'm afraid you're too late.

Ed left me last night.

Oh no.

And today I caught
him with another woman.

Gopher, this isn't what I
wanted for my honeymoon.

Cora, it's not you.

And it's not ed.

It's just that you
two never had a chance

here and in the doom room.

I'm so unhappy.

Honey, we've gotta talk--

Cora, I never expected
this from you.

Ed, i--

and with a sailor.

Oh, ed, no.

It's not what you think.

You got this all wrong.

Oh!

Oh, gopher, I'm sorry.

For this cabin, I should
have brought the whole rabbit.

Well, are you
ready for mazatl n?

We don't have much time.

Henry, I'm not going
to mazatl n with you.

Why not?

Well, I've been thinking
about what you told me before,

and I don't think we should
see each other anymore.

Oh, Stacy, you're not
going to let a little thing

like that come between us?

A little thing like that?

Yeah.

Henry, you're almost
years older than I am.

Yeah, but age shouldn't
matter if you care for someone.

I'm sorry, Henry.

But I want a nice,
normal relationship,

and I just don't know if
that's possible with someone

from the twilight zone.

Hello, Isaac.

Hi, captain.

What's up?

I was wondering
the same thing.

Last night you said you
weren't serious about Gayle,

and today you're engaged.

Wait a minute, can't
a guy change his mind?

His mind, yes.

His heart I'm not so sure about.

Hold on, captain.

Maybe I didn't mean
to propose to Gayle.

Maybe I was a little scared.

But now that I have, I think
it's the best thing that

could have ever happened to me.

Well.

I hope you're right.

Love will grow.

How do you know?

I'll make it grow.

Besides, I love that kid,
and he needs a father.

For the first time
in my life, I feel

like I'm doing something with
responsibility, something

important.

I'm going to get married
and have a family.

All right, Isaac.

I know how you feel.

Thank you, sir.

And I want to know you can
always count on my support.

It means a lot to me.

Julie (on pa): We hope you
enjoyed your stay in mazatl n.

As we head back to
Los Angeles, there's

still plenty of time for
romancing under the stars

or dancing the night away
in the acapulco lounge.

All right,
everybody, let's conga!

[Conga music]

Dwight, I've
gotta talk to you.

Oh, don't you know it's
indecent to stop a conga

line before the last ugh?

Hey, Dwight, listen.

It's very important.

Fellow congaphiles, your
leader will be right back!

You'd better have
a seat, Dwight.

Yes, yes, Henry.

Henry, what is it?

Well, it's about this check.

Well, look, if
it's not enough,

I'll be glad to double it.

I haven't felt so
good in years!

Dwight, I can't accept this.

See, I lied to you
about that youth serum.

Huh?

That stuff that you drank
was nothing but vegetable

juice and seaweed.

What do you mean?

I mean it's a fraud.

It won't turn back
the hands of time.

Well, then why--

why do I feel so young?

I'm sorry, Dwight, but
you're not getting any younger.

Then why do you look so young!

Because I am young.

But one day I'm going to look
just as old as my grandfather.

The Henry Harper that you
cheated out of a fortune.

Oh.

I see.

I'm sorry, Dwight.

I really am sorry.

Well, if you wanted
revenge, you certainly got it.

[Music playing]

What are you doing here?

Your boyfriend give
you the brush off?

And shouldn't you be down
below with your girlfriend?

I've never seen that
girl before in my life.

Sorry, I guess I
was thrown by the fact

that you were in a
room with a lovely lady

and you were half naked.

That was a mix-up.

They put her in the room
not knowing I was there.

You expect me to believe that?

It's the truth.

Why didn't you tell me?

I was going to,
but you were too

busy snuggling up to weasel.

His name is gopher, and I
wasn't snuggling up to him.

I was crying and he
was consoling me.

You mean, there's nothing
going on between you two?

Of course not.

I'm in love with you.

And I love you.

And you don't think
the problem is us?

Are you kidding?

It's that crazy cabin.

Romeo and Juliet couldn't
have lasted a day in there.

Well, what are we gonna
do about a cabin now?

Well, Julie took care of that.

Room .

You're going to love
the new room, honey.

It's got an ocean view,
a bathtub for two,

and a -day guarantee
against curses.

[Music playing]

Henry.

Do you know what's
going on with grandpa?

I-- I just came from
his cabin and he

won't even come to the door.

Oh.

I was afraid he'd take it hard.

Take what hard?

Stacy, what would you
say if I told you that i'm

not really years old?

Don't tell me
you're any older.

No.

You see, years ago,
your grandfather

swindled my grandfather
out of a fortune.

And I was determined
to get even.

Since I'm a dead ringer
for my grandfather

and knew all about yours through
my grandfather's diaries,

I made up the story
about the youth serum.

I see.

But I couldn't go through
with it for two reasons.

One was my conscience.

And the other is that I
fell in love with you.

Oh, Henry.

I love you too.

And I couldn't care
less how old you are.

Well, just for
the record, I'm .

You mean you're
younger than I am?

I finally got
Bobby quieted down

enough to get him to sleep.

Bobby has a terrific mom.

And I'm going to
have a terrific wife.

It's not there, is it?

What do you mean?

When we kiss, you don't
feel anything, do you?

I will.

You just have to give me time.

No, Isaac.

We've given it time,
and it's not gonna work.

I was hoping it would
for-- for Bobby's sake,

because he loves you so much.

I love Bobby too.

We both gotta try.

Isn't the love we both feel for
Bobby enough to make it work?

You know it's not.

But I want to be a
part of your lives.

And you can be, as our friend.

You know, there are
a lot of friendships

that last longer
than most marriages.

Gayle.

You know, you're right.

I wasn't sure
about the marriage,

but I am sure about
our friendship.

Well, I'm glad we found
out before anybody was hurt.

Oh, but what about Bobby?

He's gonna feel terrible
when I tell him.

Please, let me tell him.

After all, it's a father's job.

Thank you.

Why not?

Is it because of me?

Did I do something wrong?

No, no.

It's not that at all.

You're the only
thing that's right.

But Bobby, it's just
that your mother and I,

we love you different than
we feel about each other.

But you promised.

[Crying]

You were gonna be my daddy.

You were gonna take
me fishing and camping

and do all the things a
daddy's supposed to do.

I'm still gonna
do those things.

I'd never break that promise.

I love you.

You mean it?

Of course I do.

And I swear I'll always be
there whenever you need me.

Cross your heart?

Cross my heart.

Ok.

But what am I gonna call you?

You're not really
my daddy, exactly.

Uh-- why don't you
just call me uncle?

Uncle Isaac.

Nah.

Not that either.

I got it.

How about uncle daddy?

Uncle daddy it is.

[Music playing]

Bye-bye.

I hope you enjoyed your cruise.

Oh, yes, Vicki.

It was wonderful.

Good.

It was wonderful, wasn't it?

Except for what I did to Dwight.

I still feel
terrible about that.

Oh, don't get
down on yourself.

It looks like he's
doing just fine.

Well.

It was fun, ladies.

Henry, before you go,
I want to thank you.

Thank me?

For what?

Well, I've learned
something from all this.

There really is a
fountain of youth.

It's in your mind.

As long as you think
young, you are young.

Well, grandpa, you
certainly proved that true.

I almost forgot.

Would you give this
to your grandfather?

If he can find it in
his heart to forgive me,

I'd love to hear from him.

I don't know what to
say except thank you, sir.

You're welcome.

But don't call me sir.

It makes me feel
like an old man.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Oh, thank you.

It was a wonderful honeymoon.

Ah.

Sorry about your jaw, gopher.

Oh, that's ok.

I always wanted an overbite.

And you'll be happy
to know that we have

officially declared
fiesta off-limits

to all honeymoon couples.

Unless they wear garlic to
ward off the evil spirits.

I think that would end
a honeymoon no matter

what cabin they were in.

Well, bye-bye.

Good luck.

Bye.

Now, don't forget we're
going camping next week,

so I want you to be a good
boy and help you mom get

all the equipment together, ok?

You bet, uncle daddy.

Gayle, have I told you lately
how fantastically wonderful

you are?

Not for at least minutes.

Goodbye, Isaac.

Thank you.

I know it was hard on you,
but you did the right thing.

I'm not sure, captain.

I'm just not sure.

Isaac, in your heart, do you
want to get married right now?

If that's a proposal, sir,
you've caught me at a bad time.

[Laughing]

[Theme music]