[rock music]
♪
[pummeling and yelling]
[police siren wailing]
- Police!
Open up.
- You're probably wondering,
"What did you guys do now?"
Well, to explain,
I have to go back a few days.
You know us Louds.
We're notorious for fighting
over everything,
which usually leaves us
with nothing.
- Okay, we need some tunes
for the ride.
What should it be?
- Rock.
- Love songs.
- The sports station.
- West Coast rap.
[all yelling at once]
[air horn blares]
- If you kids can't decide,
your father and I
will decide for you.
[banjo music]
both: Yee-haw!
[all groan]
- Kids, I'm off
to the grocery store.
Any requests for dinner?
[rumbling]
- Sardines.
- Chicken nuggets.
- Bean chips.
- Banana cream pie!
- Ahh!
- Worms!
The butcher usually
sets some aside for me.
[all yelling at once]
[air horn blares]
- If you guys can't decide,
I'll decide for you.
Goulash it is.
[all groan]
[all yelling at once]
- [sighs]
Time for "ARGGH!"
[gasps]
Oof.
- You mean
"Vampires of Melancholia."
Ah!
- You mean "Prison Pageants."
- [growls]
Basketball.
[pummeling and yelling]
- You guys can't be
remotely serious.
[laughing]
But really,
I want to watch
the Circus Channel.
[all yelling at once]
[air horn blares]
- Well, if you kids
are going to fight,
I'll take the remote.
Thank you.
- Now we just wait
and watch it grow.
[birds chirping]
[all groan]
- But then I discovered
that to get what you want
in this family,
you don't necessarily
have to fight.
[baseball fanfare]
- Uh, Lynn, I usually watch
"ARGGH!" after school.
- Ah, no problem, Lincoln.
Only / innings left
in this game.
[both cheering]
- Mom, I usually watch
"ARGGH!" after school.
- I know, Lincoln, but let Lynn
watch her game today, okay?
She has a friend over.
- A friend, you say?
I called my discovery
"playing the friend card."
It means Mom and Dad
give you special privileges
if you have a friend over.
I'm pretty sure my siblings
weren't aware of it.
But now I was.
- Move it, Lincoln.
We're watching
"The Dream Boat."
- Uh, girls, let Lincoln
watch "ARGGH!"
He has a friend over.
[both groan]- Sigh.
- Guys, I'm baking cookies.
Who wants to lick the beaters?
[rumbling]
all: I do, I do!
- Get out of my way,
or I'll find you in your cell
after lights out.
- Lola, you really got to stop
watching those prison shows.
- Girls, Lincoln has
a friend over.
Let them have the beaters.
- Drop it, Stinkin'.
We have dibs.
- Girls, let Lincoln play.
He has a friend over.
[both whistling]
- Dinner is served.
- Chicken nuggets?
Bogus, dude.
I asked for
bangers and mash.
- And I clearly recall
requesting sardines.
I'm low on my omega-s.
- Well, Lincoln
has a friend over,
so Clyde got to pick
tonight's dinner.
- And I suggested
chicken nuggets.
- And I said
that was a great idea.
- I call this emergency
sibling meeting to order.
Something stinks
in this household.
And I'm not referring
to our collective
chicken nugget breath.
According to my calculations,
there is a direct correlation
between the amount of time
Clyde has been over
and the number of privileges
accrued by Lincoln.
Someone
who fancies himself a wit
might call this
"playing the friend card."
[all gasp]
- You are so right, sis.
- I got this.
During guard change,
I'll sneak up on him
in the shower.
- Uh, sister,
that won't be necessary.
I have another plan.
- I can't wait
to watch "ARGGH!"
- Me too.
I hope Hunter can escape
from that haunted
port-a-potty.
- You boys want to join me and
Roxanne for "Prison Pageants?"
- Mom!
Lola's watching TV,
but Clyde and I
are supposed to watch "ARGGH!"
- Sorry, honey.
Let Lola watch her show.
She has a friend over.
- But I have
a friend over too.
- True, but Lola
got to the TV first.
[guitars strumming]
- We may not get the TV,
but at least we can have
some cookies.
- All out, brah.
Dad said Sam and I
had first dibs.
- We may not have the TV
or the cookies,
but at least
we can choose lunch.
Hey, Dad, Clyde said he would
love franks and beans today.
- Well, Lincoln suggested it,
but I agreed.
- Sorry, guys.
Lunch is already made.
- Yeah.
- Ahh!
- My friend Haiku
is staying for lunch
and requested blood sausage.
[bird caws]
- Friend? I don't see a--
ahh!
- Okay, we may not have the TV,
or cookies,
or the lunch we want,
but we can still
play badminton.
- Sorry, Lincoln.
Whitney and I have the court.
I'm onto you, buster.
And in case you thought
you were getting
any other privileges today,
everyone else is onto you too.
- [gasps]
[both gasp]
- Yikes.
That's a lot of kids.
You want to hide at the mall
for a few hours?
- Do I?
It'll be quieter
and less crowded.
- My sisters had discovered
"the friend card."
But they forgot
that Lincoln Loud
is the man with the plan.
So I just came up with a way
to outsmart them.
- Whoo-whoo!
Doubleheader time.
- We'll be watching "ARGGH!"
Thanks.
- [chuckles]
In your dreams.
I have a friend over,so, uh--
- Yes, you have
one friend over.
But I have two.
And two is greater than one.
[girls scream]
[rock music]
- Guess what, Lincoln?
I can do math too.
And three is greater than two.
[boys scream]
[laughter]
- Hey, Sam and I had dibs
on that popcorn.
- Gee, sorry, Luna.
But I've got
three friends over.
And three beats one.
- Dude, I thought
we were on the same side.
- Yeah, well,
Lincoln brought in two friends,
so I did what I had to do.
- Well, fine.
I can call my friends too.
Operator, can you help me
place this call?
[upbeat music]
Dude, mind if
we cut in?
- But Becky and I
are playing--
- No, totally, dude.
I get that.
It's just that you only have
one friend over,
and I have four.
- Can you please pass
the remote, Lynn?
It's time
for my fashion-show show.
- [mimics buzzer]
I have three friends over,
so I get the TV.
Thank you.
- Three?
Oh, that's so cute.
I have five.
Wait...
Yeah, five.
- Excuse me, Leni,
my friends and I have to watch
our dating advice show.
- Sorry, Lori.
I have five friends over and--
- Oh.
Only five?
I'll save you the trouble--
there are six of them.
Remote, please.
- Pardon the intrusion,
eldest sibling.
But it's time for
the congressional hearings.
- But, Lisa--
- Lucky seven, baby.
Count 'em.
- Move it, Lisa.
My eight friends and I
want to watch
"Prison Pageants."
- Sorry, Lola,
but my nine friends and I
would like to watch
"Vampires of Melancholia."
- Hit the road, Jack.
My ten friends and I
have a concert to watch.
- Everyone "nose"
that is more than .
And we have a comedy special
to watch.
- You guys, this is
literally out of control.
Lana, did you really
have to invite
of your muddy friends over?
- Don't bark at me.
Lincoln invited randos over
from the arcade.
I bet you don't even know
all their names.
- I do too.
There's Jeff--
or is it Josh?
- By my calculations, with this
many people in the house,
we could be approaching
a threat level of...
stampeding T-Rex.
- Hey, I was watching that!
- Too bad.
- No, too bad for you!
- Give me the remote.
I want to watch
the sports channel.
- Uh-oh.
Make that erupting volcano.
[pummeling and yelling]
- That's just great, Lincoln.
Those complete strangers
you invited into our home
just started a fight.
- Jim would never do that.
It was probably
Lola's pageant group.
They looked vicious.
- [scoffs] My money's on
Lynn's meathead jock friends.
- Ugh.
[all arguing]
[rock music]
[police siren wailing]
- Police!
Open up.
- And now you're caught up.
[all yelling]
- Okay, kids.
Break it up.
Party's over.
- Ugh, get me out of here.
- Stop shoving me.
- Wait, Leni.
You don't leave.
You live here.
- Oh, right.
- What is going on here?
Why are there kids
walking out of our house?
- Are you the parents?
I'm afraid you've got
a $ ticket
for noise violation.
Try to keep your kids
under control.
- Anyone care to explain?
- I will. I've got the story
down pretty well by now.
And now you're caught up.
- Well, you guys are going
to have to use your allowances
to pay for this ticket.
- And I hope you've learned
your lesson.
- Definitely.
We're done playing
the friend card.
In fact, we fold.
[laughing]
- Guys, from now on,
why don't we just take turns
choosing what show to watch
and who gets to lick
the beaters and junk.
- Pretty sweet idea.
We can start
with dinner tonight.
- Lori, you're the oldest.
Why don't you go first?
- Ooh, okay.
I think we should have--
- Um, sorry, honey.
Tonight's dinner
has already been set.
We're having goulash.
- Goulash?
- Why?
[doorbell rings]
- Well... [chuckles]
We're having friends over.
- ♪ Cramped inside
this tiny space ♪
♪ May sound bad
but ain't the case ♪
♪ In the Loud house
- ♪ Loud house
- ♪ Duck and dodge
and push and shove ♪
♪ That's the way we show
our love in the Loud house ♪
- ♪ Loud house
♪ Laundry piles
stacked up high ♪
♪ Hand-me-downs
that make me cry ♪
♪ Stand in line
to take a pee ♪
♪ Never any privacy
♪ Chaos with kids
♪ That's the way
it always is ♪
♪ In the Loud house
03x13 - Friendzy
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Series revolves around the chaotic everyday life of a boy named Lincoln Loud, who is the middle child and only son in a large family of 11 children.
Series revolves around the chaotic everyday life of a boy named Lincoln Loud, who is the middle child and only son in a large family of 11 children.