04x19 - Just Another Fish Story

Episode transcripts for the TV show "m*rder, She Wrote". Aired: September 30, 1984 – May 19, 1996.*
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Mystery writer and amateur detective Jessica is a down-to-earth, middle-aged widow who ferrets out the criminals in idyllic Cabot Cove, Maine, which apparently is the m*rder capital of the United States.
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04x19 - Just Another Fish Story

Post by bunniefuu »

I always thought I'd be nervous
about getting ma-ma-

- Married?
- Tonight on m*rder, She Wrote.

The more you abuse the nouveau riche,
the better they tip.

My youngest wants to leave the house, and go out on
her own. I told her I got other plans for my pension.

I thought you want me
to make the recipe more exciting.

More exciting, not more Chinese!

I can't tell my father I'm involved
in a m*rder investigation.

This gig is about as permanent
as origami tofu.

I don't take orders from some punk who
rides in here on his sister's apron strings.

What's wrong?
Has somebody been hurt?

Donna broke off the engagement!

Look, uh, just because it's you,
how about, uh,

a thousand for the lobster and
2,000 for the caviar, deal?

Okay. You want it delivered
the usual time?

Hey, they haven't noticed so far.
Why should they now?

Oh, dear. I was hoping I'd have time
to stop off and freshen up,

but my nephew says we can't change
this reservation for anything.

If we hit crosstown traffic, you'll be lucky
if you get there in time for dessert. Oh?

That is, if they're still in business.

A lotta places have opened and closed
on that block in the last couple of years.

Yeah, well, this one
seems to be quite popular.

My nephew advised me
to invest in it.

It seems to be doing very well.

You take my advice, lady,
you get out while the goin's good.

Last year I took a lot of fares
to a Serbo-Croatian place at that address.

It was doin' good too.

There it is.

Boy, this neighborhood's really gone
down the flusher.

It ain't even dark yet
and already the cowboys are out.

Thank you very much.

Grady?
Aunt Jess? Hi.

Oh, my goodness.
Wow, you look great.

Well, I've never seen you
look so, uh, relaxed.

Yeah, isn't it amazing? I always thought
I'd be nervous about getting ma-ma-

Married?
Yeah.

And speaking of that,
where's Donna?

Oh, she's working late,
but she'll be here soon.

Uh-huh. Actually, Alice's
Farm is her first solo account.

Aunt Jess, she just loves accounting.

That's how I knew I was finally on the right
track, you know, girl-wise. Yes.

Well, uh, I can't wait to meet her.

Uh, Grady, I've never seen you dress
quite like this for dinner.

Yeah, isn't it great?

What? But we had a reservation.

I'm very, very sorry,
but I can't seem to find it.

Hey, dude.
Great game last night.

You know,
you made me a couple of bucks.

Hey, thanks, Chaz.
Love your bolo.

Oh. Yeah, my-my trance channeler
got it for me from Santa Fe.

- Excuse me, but, uh, we've had this reservation
for a couple of weeks, Mr., uh... Oh, call me Chaz.

- Uh, you are?
- Jessica Fletcher.

Yeah, she's put quite a few bucks
into this place, uh, dude.

Aw, great! Then you'll have lots
to talk about with your fellow investors.

Uh, I'll get you a table
just as soon as I possibly-

Hey, Congressman Phelps!

Hey!
How goes it in Albany, dude?

How ya doin'?
Hey, I got your table right over here.

Grady!
Hey, Doug!

How's my man? And this pretty lady
must be J.B. Fletcher, our famous investor.

- Well, not so famous.
- Sure you are.

You're the only one here from Maine.

Yeah, somehow I guessed that.

Oh, this is Doug Brooke, Aunt Jess.
He runs the business end of things.

- Oh, how do you do?
- Well, Sis is the star.

Alice and I have us a deal-
I stay outta the kitchen...

and she stays outta my books.

Hey, where's Donna?
Oh, she's gonna meet us here.

Yeah, l-I'm afraid we're gonna have to go
somewhere else to eat.

Yeah, your partner can't seem to find
our reservation.

What? Well, dang it.
I took them down myself.

Chaz, you got a minute?

Fletcher. I thought you city
folks could read.

Oh, Fletcher, Fletcher.
Yeah, I, uh-I misunderstood.

It gets so loud in here.

I'll have your table for you
in a few minutes.

And in the meantime, I'd like to buy y'all
some drinks-on the house.

So, Grady, how's that pen pushin'
goin', huh? Oh, it's goin' great.

Yeah?

Oh, Nerissa.
Hey, loved your video art piece.

Thank you, Chaz. I'm, uh-
I'm afraid I forgot to make a reservation.

- Oh, uh, Gabriel, would you get
Nerissa's usual table please?
- Very good.

Hey, you're gonna hurt
your finger, kiddo.

I have had it with you
sellin' off our tables, pops.

Look, amigo, I don't take orders
from some punk...

who rides in here
on his sister's apron strings.

What is this?
Ten orders of caviar here.

What happened to it?
Our menu says "burnt meat loaf."

This meat loaf looks, uh, like meat loaf. Did you
remember to turn the oven up the last 10 minutes?

Sorry, Alice. I forgot. You
forgot and a yuppie goes hungry.

- Coming through.
- Coming through.

Listen, Sis. I know that Chaz Crewe
brings in lots of investors-

Oh, please, Douglas.
Don't start with the Chaz thing again.

But that jerk is nothing but trouble.

He is taking bribes for tables.
Our own partner!

Look, he brings in
the right kind of people, okay?

The kind of people who think there's something
chic in paying 22.50 for fried chicken.

We are established now, Al.
Why can't we just buy him out?

Somehow I don't think Chaz
would go for that.

Yeah, well, what if he doesn't really
have a choice?

Oh, you're gonna like this, Mrs. Fletcher.

Same wine I poured for Tennessee.
He liked it a lot.

Oh, that is delicious.
Is it French?

Oh, what else? All these bozos ever
wanna drink are white wine spritzers.

Aunt Jess, there's a table opening up.
Thank heavens. I'm starved!

Hey! Hold on to your suede, pal.

You know, the more you abuse
the nouveau riche, the better they tip.

Now, Hemingway-
there was a terrific tipper.

Hey, he signed a wine cork
for me once.

Here.
Oh, my goodness.

Isn't that a lovely memento.

And you can still just see the signature.

The vintage on that cork
is as old as your stories, Harry.

Well, we can't all be as up-to-the-second
as you are, Mimi.

Well, it's a dirty job,
but somebody's gotta do it.

Mimi, I want you to meet a real writer.

This is Jessica Fletcher,
mystery novelist.

Mimi Harcourt, gossip.

Not gossip, Harry. Trends.

You're a columnist? Oh, I've always thought
that must be the hardest job.

Well, I'm afraid
I haven't read you either, Jennifer.

But, of course,
my readers aren't into fiction,

they're more into
making their own scene.

Wow! We're in the same restaurant
as the writer of Who's Into What.

Uh, Grady, the scene that Miss Harcourt
is into seems to be our table.

Grady?

Donna? Hi.

Hi. Oh-
Oh, here.

Oh, here, sit.
I'll take that.

Mrs. Fletcher, I've been so excited
about meeting you,

especially now that Grady and I
are getting ma-ma-mm-

I'm sorry to be late, but I had to
finish up these books for Mr. Brooke.

L- I didn't have time to change.

L- I feel so out of place here
in my work clothes.

- Well, I think you look lovely.
- Yeah, I'll say.

I have a terrible favor to ask.

Well, maybe it's not terrible,
but it is unexpected.

I mean, I guess
I should have expected it. L-

I'm sure it's no problem.

Well, I just talked to my
parents. Your parents?

They're leaving the country
for a couple months-some business thing.

So they're throwing us a party.
A party?

At their house up in Fishkill
tomorrow. Tomorrow?

I'm really sorry to spring this,
but they just phoned,

and they really wanna meet you.

Both. I'm sorry.

Don't feel
that you have to apologize.

- I'm sure that we'll all
have a delightful time.
- Yeah, you bet.

Now, I want you both to tell me
all the plans for the wedding.

Um, w-well we haven't really
talked about it yet.

I didn't want to, you know,
impose anything.

Wh-whatever you want
w-would be fine. Really.

But what do you want it to be?
Whatever you want.

Really. Really?

And maybe we can have
the cake shaped as a ledger.

And for favors,
we can have pens with our initials on 'em.

That's great!
Aunt Jess, isn't this incredible?

We haven't even talked about it.
We both want the same wedding.

Incredible!

Excuse me, uh, would you people
like to chow down?

Now since this is such a special occasion,

I think that we should start off
with some caviar, don't you?

Caviar-
I'm sorry we're outta caviar.

But however, we have
some of Alice's special Farm Caviar.

Instead of fish eggs,
it's made with oeufs de poulet.

Oeufs de poulet?
You mean, uh, hard-boiled eggs?

On toast points.

One last toast-
to many more happy dinners together.

Hello. I just wanted to make sure I thanked you,
Miss Fletcher, for helpin' us open this place.

- Y'all enjoy your food?
- Jessica, this is Alice Brooke.

It's Doug's sister.
It was absolutely delicious.

And my fish was superb.

I had no idea that you could get yellowtail
on this coast.

Well it took the overland route.
It was frozen.

You know, I never
would have guessed that.

Congratulations
on all your success here.

Well, I think I'm the one
who should be congratulatin'.

The way I figure it, I'm gettin'
two accountants for the price of one.

Ow! Geez!

Oh! Are you all right?
Yeah, I'm such a klutz.

Oh. You know, Frank walked down
the aisle with a broken leg.

I'm not nervous, Aunt Jess.

I really can't wait to get ma-ma-It's just
that I have a hard time talkin' about it.

You don't have to, Grady.
I can't tell you how happy I am.

She's, uh-
She's pretty okay, isn't she?

Mm-hmm. Donna gives
new meaning to "okay."

Believe me.
Oh.

♪♪

♪♪

Hello. Jessica?

Donna?
What's the matter?

The police-They've come
to take me to the restaurant.

But why?
What's happened?

Chaz. Somebody found him there
this morning.

- Found him?
- Dead. m*rder*d!

Oh.

The day manager called us
when he found the front door open.

Now, nothing's been touched,
including this ledger.

You see these entries, Miss
Mayberry? They've been whited-out.

What were they?
L-I'm not sure.

You are the accountant
for this restaurant, aren't you?

Lieutenant Rupp, Donna gave this ledger
to Doug Brooke, Alice's brother.

Maybe he knows
what those entries were.

I just brought it up to date
yesterday.

Good, good. So it shouldn't be too hard for
you to figure out exactly what was erased.

The department appreciates
your cooperation.

You-You mean now? But what about-
We have to get upstate.

I would like
the weekend off too, ma'am.

You mean, we might have to stay here
the whole weekend?

Lieutenant, it-it's just
that we're supposed...

to attend an engagement party.

You kids are getting married?
Oh, that's great. That's just great.

See, too many of the young people today
are just shacking up.

It's nice to find somebody
who has the right values. Excuse me.

Grady, what are we gonna do?

I can't tell my father I'm involved
in a m*rder investigation.

He'd-He'd disown me!
No. Well, maybe Lieutenant Rupp,

if he really understands the situation-

I'll have a word with him.

Time and method's gonna be tough.

Even after the body defrosts?

Yep. Take your choice-

He got himself conked on the noggin.
He was knifed with a jagged-edged blade.

Except the wounds are too shallow.

More like he was slashed
than, uh, stabbed, huh?

Cause of death could be any of above,
or combination of any of above.

Excuse me, Lieutenant Rupp?

Uh, there seems to be
something here on the floor.

Uh, Lieutenant, I don't want to be
a nuisance, but, uh,

my nephew's future in-laws
are leaving the country.

And since this is our only chance
to meet them, would it be possible...

for Donna to examine the books
after the weekend?

Sorry, Mrs. Fletcher, but I have to proceed
while the trail is hot.

Well then, Lieutenant, could she take the
books with her and just report back to you?

Lieutenant, the Brookes are here.

Excuse me.

No. No, everything's fine, fine,

except we're just gonna be a teensy
bit late.

Mother-
Mother, it's just some work stuff.

Now, you know how Daddy always says
work comes first.

Yeah, I'll say.

Grady, I thought you had never met
Donna's father?

Well, I haven't. It's just that I know
he drives Donna pretty hard.

This look familiar, sir?
Sure, it's a-it's a register tape.

Did you get it off of Chaz?
How'd you know that?

Well, whoever closes up takes
that little thing out of the register...

and enters the night's total
into the ledger.

Last night it was Chaz.

Well, I sure am glad
you had me check, Lieutenant.

It seems that six cases of lobster
took a hike from my freezer.

Six boxes?

Well that-
that must cost us, uh, $1,500!

Sounds like the victim
surprised a thief.

I'll be at the restaurant helping Donna.
This could take a while.

Well, even if we miss the party, we can still
go to Fishkill tomorrow to meet Donna's parents.

Aw, geez. I don't know, Aunt Jess.
This could take a long time.

Grady, you're not afraid
to meet Donna's parents, are you?

No. Why should I be?
Well, I have no idea.

But you seem quite happy...

to have an excuse to stay in town.

Mr. Mayberry-that's Donna's father-

is president, founder and C.E.O.
Of Mayberry-Waterman.

- It's like the third largest
accounting firm in the state.
- That doesn't sound like much of a problem.

Well, it's just that I kind of met him
about five years ago.

Actually, I kind of worked for him
for a couple of days.

Actually, he fired me.

Grady, I'm so sorry.

And you never told Donna, huh?

No. How could I?

But you're marrying
Mr. Mayberry's daughter,

not Mr. Mayberry.

But he has big plans for her.
She's his only child.

Well, in that case, it might be wise...

for you to meet him face-to-face
before the wedding.

I was kind of hopin'
he wouldn't be at the wedding.

Hello.
Mimi Harcourt? Wow!

Y-Yeah. Yeah, what a-
Yeah, she's right here.

A late breakfast?
Yeah, she'd love to join you.

- Y-Yeah, I'll tell her. Okay.
- Y-Yeah, good-b-

She's rushing an article on the restaurant for the next
issue of City magazine, and she wants to interview you.

She says it's absolutely vital. Oh,
sure. I'd love to join her. Hmm.

Oh, come on, Aunt Jess.
Mimi Harcourt's gossip central.

Who knows what you'll be able
to find out?

It might get us outta town a lot quicker, and-I
guess you're right. I should get this over with.

Tell me where to meet her.

I knew you would.

Can you believe it? Huh!

Valentino's actually playing tapes
of people having fun...

to try to get business back.

And you know the amazing thing?
It just might work.

Anyway, as I was saying, the food's
just not the same here since Alice left.

And, of course, taking Harry and Chaz with her
just helped to put the final nails in the coffin.

And was Valentino furious?

Uh, but surely that sort of thing
happens quite a lot.

Oh, of course!

The food biz is all theater.

Part of the excitement is watching
the changing cast of characters.

Speaking of actors,

I couldn't help but notice Alice's, uh,
down-home accent kind of comes and goes.

It's retro-chic, darling.
You know, the opposite of chic is in.

But back to business.

Um, this article had to be in yesterday.

Of course, yesterday
the m*rder hadn't happened.

You think I'd do a piece
about m*rder?

I wouldn't stoop to that kind
of sensationalism.

Waiter,

get me a phone.

They just won't leave me alone.

Where were we?

Uh, oh, yes.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.

My story is about people
who invest in restaurants.

It's the clientele
that makes places happen.

Oh, but surely the food and-and the
service has a great deal to do with it.

Oh, please. That kind of stuff you
could get at Alice's Farm in TV dinners.

Which incidentally,
are on their way back. Huh.

It's me.

What!

You are kidding!

But that is terrible. Aww.

Aww.

Well, you tell him-
you tell him I'll be right there.

Okay? Okay.

- Oh.
- Another fast-breaking trend?

My fingernail designer
has been arrested. Oh, God.

And I've got this big party to go to tonight.
I've gotta bail him out. Listen, Jennifer.

You're a writer. Do me a favor-

Messenger me a bio
about the investor article, okay?

Here, I always pay my own way.

I wouldn't want anybody to think
they were buying a free plug.

Bye.

Hey, Valentino.
Knock off the ambience tape.

Besides, there's no one
listenin’ anymore.

Excuse me,
are you the proprietor?

Valentino Reggiore,
at the lovely signora's service.

You know, you have such
an elegant establishment here, signor.

Those new places are so loud.

You know,
I'm an investor in Alice's Farm.

But when I heard
that horrifying news this morning,

well, I was tempted to pull out.

Well, everything today is fads.
They have gypsy cuisine,

Serbo-Cambodian cuisine.

Oh, I miss good old-fashioned food.
Don't you?

Oh, here's my bill. Please,
signora, it's on the house.

Oh, that's very nice.

Oh, anything for such a lovely lady.

Besides, it's much easier
than starting a new tape.

You see,
Chaz could have closed out early...

by taking the tape out of the register...

and then pocketing the rest
of the night's money.

Yeah, you see, the totals on the nights Chaz
closed out are lower than the other nights.

What are you saying? The victim
is ripping off his own restaurant?

There are other white-outs
going back a couple months.

In each case, somebody erased an entry and filled in
a smaller amount. Yeah, after Donna paid the account.

So the restaurant was paying
for supplies that were stolen.

Well, why would he steal from
himself? He wasn't.

He was stealing from his investors.

Now, if you'll excuse us.
We have got a party to go to.

Now, is this all you got?

All we've got?
I'm sorry, ma'am,

but if he’s ripping off his investors,
maybe one of ‘em found out.

Now, I gotta know
who had access to the books...

and the invoices,
and I need a list of the investors.

That could take
the rest of the day at least!

Lieutenant Rupp, I really can't understand
why you expect Donna to do your work for you.

Hey, I work plenty hard. Now, we
found out that the victim's wounds...

were caused by a sickle-shaped,
jagged-edged knife.

That's about the only kind of blade
that a Swiss army knife doesn't have.

So we been combin' the restaurant
for a m*rder w*apon.

Yes, well I'm sure that's all
very important police work,

but you can't keep us here
against our will.

I could place any of you
under arrest for suspicion.

- But not make it hold.
- Yeah, but it would take
the weekend to process you.

Or you could stick around
until you got the information that I need.

Y-Yes, Mother, we'll really try to be there
for dinner.

Yes, before the guests arrive.

No. I mean, of course l-
I'd love to talk to Daddy,

but I really should get back to work.

I know this doesn't sound
like my office.

I, uh-We'll come right
along as soon as we can.

And you said you have no idea who could
have been stealing from the restaurant?

Okay, good-bye. Well, some places I worked got
ripped off. You know, day managers, night managers-

They're alone a lot of the time.
And they take deliveries.

And have access to the books?

You thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?

Chaz had himself quite a
business. That little son-of-a-Doug.

Why are you always
making excuses for him, Al?

I wasn't.
Why don't you just keep still?

Alice, this fish is delicious.

Thanks. It's yellowtail.
It's the same fish you had last night.

If I remember correctly, you said
that the fish last night was frozen.

But surely this fish wasn't taken
from the freezer this morning.

Course not. Doug took it out
last night to defrost.

Mm-mmm. Not me.

It was on the counter this morning
when I came in.

Oh, my goodness.

I think I just found
our sickle-shaped m*rder w*apon.

And we just ate it.

I told you before, Lieutenant.

Doug and I went straight home
after work.

We were asleep in our apartment
until you called.

You and your brother live
together, ma'am? This is New York.

We own a restaurant, Lieutenant,
not Rockefeller Center.

My youngest wants to leave
the house and go out on her own.

I told her I got other plans
for my pension.

Lieutenant, have you determined
if there was blood on the fins?

There were traces, yes.

And it was the victim's.

I think I'm gonna lay off fish and chips
for a while.

I never saw any blood, I swear.

You know what I can't figure out?

Why anybody would choose
to use a fish to k*ll somebody...

in a kitchen full of potential
m*rder weapons.

Unless-Unless they planned on
getting rid of the w*apon by cooking it.

But, Lieutenant,
I thought your medical examiner said...

that Chaz didn't die
from knife wounds.

So what? He was still slashed
with that fish.

Yeah, but doesn't that make it unlikely
that the m*rder was premeditated?

What are you saying? You're saying that some poor
slob just grabbed a fish because it was handy?

Well, supposing-
supposing Chaz att*cked somebody.

Perhaps somebody who had discovered
that he was stealing from the restaurant.

Right. And the k*ller used the fish
to defend himself?

Well, it fits the position of the body,
if I remember correctly.

And he could have hit his head on a shelf or
on a crate and knocked himself unconscious.

Lady, I gotta read one of your books.

- How's your list comin'?
- Hmm?

Oh, I was just assessing the value
of what was stolen last night.

Lobster tail and caviar.
It was quite a take.

I thought you were working on the people
who had access to the books.

I thought the Lieutenant
might wanna know about this too.

Donna, let's just stick with
what the Lieutenant asked us to do, okay?

My goodness, you two have been sitting here for
hours. Why don't you stand up and have a good stretch?

I just can't get these figures to add up
straight. Oh, you mean the list of investors.

They just don't add up to the total
capitalization on the restaurant.

Now either my calculator's broken
or some investors names aren't in there.

And then there's all these initials
that Chaz scribbled in there.

What if these initials
were silent partners?

You know, investors who didn't want
their identities to be known.

There were several profit checks that Chaz
instructed me to send to business managers.

Let's see.

M.H. M.H.

Mimi Harcourt.

Mimi Har-Oh, come on, Aunt Jess.
That doesn't make any sense.

- She's a columnist. She wouldn't-
- Wouldn't she?

She seems to be rather sensitive to conflicts
of interest. Maybe she has reason to be.

I have something that I have
to return to Miss Harcourt,

and I wouldn't want to wait
any longer with it.

Grady, I need some books
from the office. I'll be back in a bit.

Can we share a cab?

Donna, I don't want
to interfere, but is everything all right?

It's just very scary when you've done
something wrong and people snap at you.

People you love.

Donna, the kind of stress that you
and Grady are experiencing right now,

you know, it-it's really quite natural.

Maybe so, Jessica. But I'm having,
well, kind of serious doubts.

About the marriage?
About everything.

Just now in there,
Grady reminded me of my father.

Grady? Daddy is so demanding.
He's such a perfectionist.

Once when I was about 10,
I lost something important.

And I decided the best thing to do
was to own up.

He screamed and carried on.
It was just awful.

- Oh, my goodness. What had you lost?
- My allowance ledger.

Uh, Donna, why do I get the feeling...

that you don't want to be
an accountant?

But how did-
I mean, don't tell anybody, please!

Oh, of course I won't. But-

But if it makes you miserable,
for goodness sakes, don't do it.

But it means so much to Daddy.

And... Grady's so enthusiastic
about me being a career woman.

And all I really want...

is to stay home and have a family.

It's just awful, Jessica,
because I love him so much.

But I just don't know
that we're right for each other.

Donna,

I'm not saying this
because I'm Grady's aunt,

but I honestly don't think that I have ever met
two people who are more suited to each other.

Oh, Miss Harcourt. I was on my way up to
see you. I really can't spare but a second.

It's absolutely vital I get these changes
in on the car-phone answering-machine piece.

Oh, I understand. But I did want to give
you back the money you left for breakfast.

Mr. Reggiore insists
that the meal is on him.

If my editor heard you.

Oh, my lips are sealed.

Besides, I really came here
to tell you...

that the authorities are going
to let Alice reopen tonight.

Really?

And I really do think that you
should be there to show your support.

I mean, I do think that's vital.
I mean, all of us investors-

I mean, we have to keep
that place jumping, now don't we?

We investors?
I'm afraid you've made a mistake.

- Oh, say no more.
- Listen, Jennifer, girl to girl,

this would have real negative
energy flow if it were to get out.

Oh, you mean the conflict
of interest bit?

Of course, that is a pain. Look, this gig
is about as permanent as origami tofu.

They have gone through
six journalists here in the last two years.

I'm just providing for my future.

So, you told Chaz that you
wanted to get in on the interest deal.

Well, that's understandable. It was
Chaz's idea. He made it sound so safe.

Only he would know about it. Then
I find out he's blabbing all over town.

Last night, Alice came over to my table and
started to thank me in front of my guests.

Oh, you must have been
very angry with Chaz.

Hold the telex here.

If you're going to imply
that I had something to do with his death,

you should know
I have an alibi for last night.

And I mean all of last night.

I was at my apartment
with Doug Brooke.

Oh, but he was with his sister.
Hmm, I gotta go.

Okay, Jessica, I lied.

I swear I did not leave
the apartment all night.

But, Alice, why fabricate a story
that was so easy to disprove?

- I panicked. I was worried about this idiot.
- Hey!

Look, you didn't come home till this
morning after the lieutenant had called,

with no explanation
of where you had been.

I had to say something.

And you were worried that Doug
wouldn't be able to account for himself,

so you fabricated an alibi for him?

- You thought I k*lled Chaz. Geez!
- I didn't know what to think-

especially after what you said
last night about getting rid of him.

Oh, great!
Now you don't trust me.

Well, in finding out you were carrying on
with Mimi Harcourt...

- didn't exactly build my confidence in you.
- Damn, I don't believe this.

You've always been irresponsible. You know,
if you'd been keeping an eye on Chaz,

he wouldn't have been selling our stuff,
uh, God knows where.

Alice, there wouldn't be many people...

- who would be interested
in buying stolen lobster, would there?
- I guess not. Why?

So, the signora is a writer of
cookbooks? Oh, no. No. Uh, mysteries.

But I'm thinking of setting one
in a restaurant.

Ah, so you came for
the atmosphere. Uh-huh.

Well, I would be delighted
to show the signora around.

What-What-What are you doing?
That's soy sauce!

I thought you want me
to make the recipe more exciting.

More exciting, not more Chinese!

Are you sure you would not like
to collaborate in a cookbook?

We seem to be molto simpatico.

How do you feel about...
garlic?

Well, it really isn't my field
of expertise.

Oh, pity.

Well, look. Ask. Feel free.
Well, thank you very much.

Oh, I see that you're serving,
uh, lobster tails for dinner.

Oh, uh, yes.
Uh, would the signora like some?

Oh, thank you very much,
but it's a little early for me.

I'm sure they'll be delicious.

That's the same supplier
as Alice's Farm uses.

Is it?
I really wouldn't know.

I keep asking myself,

"Who could use stolen restaurant supplies"?

Only another restauranteur.

Those lobster tails
came from legitimate sources.

Well, I imagine that Lieutenant Rupp
can call the distributor...

and confirm that these cartons
were sold to you.

I may have purchased some supplies
that didn't come through regular channels.

But how else can I get lobster and caviar
at reasonable prices?

But I didn't steal them.

You merely happened to buy them
from the thief.

- I'm a businessman.
- And a very resourceful one, Mr. Reggiore.

Reggiore Restaurant.
It's for you.

Oh.

Thank you.
Hello? Oh, Grady.

What's happened?
You sound terrible.

Aunt Jess,
I don't know what to do.

What's wrong?
Has somebody been hurt?

- It's happened again.
- Oh, no! Not another m*rder?

No. I've been dumped!

Donna broke off the engagement!

She called and said she wouldn't
marry me. Just like that.

But, Grady, she must have said
something else.

Yeah. That she was gonna tell her parents
and that she loved me.

Boy, you know,
I really don't get this at all.

I finally find the girl that I love
and she says she loves me.

And then she dumps me.
I mean, what's the point?

Let me guess-career woman,
right? Yeah, how'd you know?

You give 'em the key to the executive
washroom, and they want your trousers.

Let me buy you a drink.
Bartender, two, uh, gin martinis.

Uh, no.
Make mine a club soda, Harry.

Grady, uh, maybe Donna's scared.

Uh, just like you're scared,
maybe more than you are.

Impossible.
Nobody could be more scared than me.

- Maybe it's just as well.
- Now, I don't believe that. And neither do you.

No, really.

I mean,
what it really comes down to is,

I think I want a wife
who will be a wife...

and will stay at home
and raise the kids,

have dinner on the table.

I mean, what's wrong with wanting things
to be a little old-fashioned?

Boy, I hate it when I say stuff like that.

Uh, have you told Donna this?

No. I'd never stand in her way.
I wouldn't wanna hold her back.

Grady, you and Donna
have to talk about this.

Now, I know- and I mean I know-
that when you do,

you're gonna be able
to work all this out.

Aunt Jess, what did you say
to Donna in the cab?

I haven't seen her since then. I told her
the same thing that I'm telling you now.

You two are perfect
for each other.

Now will you go and call her?

I tried. There's no answer at her
apartment. Maybe it was something I said.

Mrs. Fletcher?

I thought I'd find you here.

Can I talk to you for a minute?
Oh, certainly.

Alone.
Yes.

I really owe you some thanks.

I checked on Valentino's alibi.
It won't hold minestrone.

So I booked him for the m*rder.

But, Lieutenant,
that doesn't make any sense.

- I mean, what motive would he have?
- Revenge.

The victim stole all of his customers.

Yes, but Chaz also provided Valentino
with stolen goods. And come to think of it,

- how did those goods get to Valentino's?
- I see what you're sayin'.

Chaz could not have delivered the lobster
to Valentino's last night himself.

Unless Chaz had an associate
who picked up the supplies.

Now wait a minute. Valentino could've
come to pick up the stuff... and k*ll Chaz.

Yes, but then why was the front door
open this morning?

Now what are you saying?
Are you saying that Chaz's accomplice...

had to be somebody with a key?

Yep, sat right there.

You served Hemingway?
Get outta here!

Well, I'll prove it to ya, wise guy.
He signed a wine cork for me.

Hey. Well, where's my pocketknife?

Army knife with a screwdriver blade.

You're missing a knife
with a screwdriver blade.

So, I'm the only guy in the world
ever lost a pocketknife?

You are the only guy in the world
working in this restaurant...

who has the key for the front door.

I'm telling you, I had nothin' to do
with Chaz's death. Period.

You sure you saw him
with this knife last night?

No, I never said that.

But it shouldn't be too difficult
to get some prints from it.

Or to persuade Valentino Reggiore
to identify his supplier.

Okay, okay.

Look, Chaz and I had a scam,
but I didn't k*ll him.

Now, here's the deal.

I'd come back here after we were closed.
I'd pick up some stuff and deliver it.

Only last night it was, like, weird.

I mean, all the supplies were out,
but Chaz was nowhere.

I went to the freezer
to pick up another box of lobster tail...

to complete the order,
and there he was.

He was just-
just lyin' there on all those crates.

I guess the pocketknife must've dropped
outta my pocket as I was backing out.

I'm sorry, fella. I'm not buyin'.

Grady?

Maybe it was what I said about just doing
what the lieutenant asked us to do.

Well, you're certainly not
gonna solve the problem just sitting.

- Why don't we go and find Donna?
- Oh, no. Oh, no. I can't see her
until I've figured this thing out.

I mean, I don't wanna make
the same mistake again.

It all seemed so innocent.

I mean, sure I snapped a little
when she said she was figuring out...

the value of the lobster and caviar
that was stolen last night.

- Caviar?
- Yeah, that's what she said.

You're sure?

Well, sure, I'm sure.
Oh, Lord.

What?
What's wrong, Aunt Jess?

Grady, I want you
to go straight to your apartment.

All right? I'll call you.
Well-

Aunt Jess?
I'll call you.

Do you believe that guy
said Hemingway signed his cork?

Jessica.

- I guess Grady told you.
- Yes. May I come in?

Of course.

I was just packing to go to my parents.

Please, Jessica,
don't make this any harder.

I love Grady,

but I've thought it out,
and we're just not right for each other.

Donna, that isn't the real reason
you've broken off the engagement, is it?

Why else would I?

How did you know that caviar was stolen
from the restaurant last night?

Well, Alice said that it was missing
this morning.

All Alice noticed was the lobster.

I only knew about the caviar
because Valentino Reggiore told me.

But how else can I get lobster and caviar
at reasonable prices?

But the only way that I can think that
you would have known about that caviar...

was if you'd been in the kitchen last night
and seen Chaz take it.

Jessica, I've just been so scared.

Of course, you have.

And here was I thinking that you were all
nervous because you were getting married.

In the cab you tried to tell me
that you were in trouble.

But I didn't hear you.

It was an accident.
I was defending myself.

But l-I couldn't go to the police.
Why would they believe me?

And I couldn't involve Grady.

That's the last thing I'd want.
Donna,

people who love each other
want to help each other.

And as far as the police believing you,

well, I haven't known you much longer
than Lieutenant Rupp, and I believe you.

I guess I do have to talk to him,
don't I?

Believe it or not, it may not be
as bad an experience...

as when you confessed
to your father.

But why don't you tell me first.

I imagine you first suspected
something was wrong...

when the waiter told us
that they were out of caviar.

I had just paid for a delivery
yesterday morning.

I was afraid that I had made a mistake...

so I made the excuse
of going to the ladies' room.

But you really went
to ask Chaz about it?

No, no, no. You got it all screwed up.
We'll talk about it tomorrow.

But I'm leaving town
first thing in the morning.

And he told you to come back later?

He said he wouldn't cover
for my mistakes.

That's why I didn't tell you or Grady
that I was going back to the restaurant.

I guess I was kind of ashamed.
I just assumed that I had screwed up.

When I came back, he
didn't even try to hide anything from me.

There it was-lobster, caviar.

And the ledger-
he had already whited-out those entries.

I couldn't understand
why he’d just left all that stuff out...

when he knew that I was coming back.

- Then I realized-
- He wanted you to see.

And I suppose he offered
to cut you in.

He told me to grow up.
He said that I could make a lot of money.

Well, having an accountant on his side...

- would've made things much easier for him.
- Of course, I said no.

He was furious!
He hit me. L-

The only way I could get him to
let go of me was to hit him back.

I tried to run away, but I was so confused
and scared, that I took the wrong door.

And you found yourself in the freezer.

He grabbed me.
He was going to hit me again.

And that's when you grabbed
the frozen yellowtail?

I just... swung at him. L-

I didn't even know
what I was doing.

Then you do agree, Lieutenant Rupp,
that it really was self-defense.

Looks that way.

But you better talk to the D.A.
First thing Monday morning.

There's your young man.

Uh, Donna-
Uh, just give me a minute, will ya?

Excuse me, Lieutenant.

Go on.

Monday morning, young lady.

Oh, geez.

Grady?

There's something
I've got to confess to you.

No. No, Aunt Jess told me
all about it on the phone.

Oh, God, you poor kid.
Uh, no, no, no.

No, that's not what I mean.
L-I mean that's only part of it.

What?

Grady, honey,

I don't want to be an accountant.

I wanna be a wife.

I wanna be your wife.

I think that's gonna
work out just fine.

But there's somethin'
I gotta confess to you too.

I already met your father,
and he fired me.

Oh, that's okay.
I mean, he fires everybody.

He-He probably won't even
remember it.

Really? You think?
Oh, he fired me once too.

You're kidding. That's great.
No, I mean that's not great-
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