15x03 - Buster's Secret Admirer/The Last King of Lambland

[bunniefuu]

♪ Every day, when you're
walking down the street ♪

♪ Everybody that you meet
has an original point of view ♪

(laughing)

♪ And I say, hey ♪

Hey!

♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

♪ If we could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

♪ You got to listen to
your heart, listen to the beat ♪

♪ Listen to the rhythm,
the rhythm of the street ♪

♪ Open up your eyes,
open up your ears ♪

♪ Get together and make things
better by working together ♪

♪ It's a simple message,
and it comes from the heart ♪

♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ For that's the place
to start ♪

♪ Place to start ♪

♪ And I say, hey ♪

Hey!

Hey!

♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

♪ If we can learn to work
and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

Hey!

♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

Hey!

♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

Hey!

ARTHUR (on TV):
Hey, D.W.!

Hey!

Whoa! (loud thud)

(letters shattering)

(birds twittering)

BUSTER:
She loves me.

They love me.

I love me.

Ah, isn't love lovely?

Who doesn't love love?

DAISY:
I don't!

How would you like to have
your petals plucked?

(squirrels chittering)

Hey!

Oh...!

Ah! Stop! Cut it out!

(screams)

(panting)

(helicopter blades whirring)

Bunny's in sight!

We're going in.

(screams)

Whew.

Isn't it weird how sometimes
the nicest dreams turn out

to be the worst nightmares?

(gasps)

(roaring)

(laughs)

Hurry up, Sweetie.

It's quarter to eight.

What's in the box?

Beats me.

It's addressed to you.

That's weird.

There's no return address.

I wonder what it is.

Well, whatever it is,
please don't open it now.

You don't want to be
late for school.

For the life of me, I can't
figure out who it could be from.

Well, why don't you open it?

What if it's a giant spider?

Why would someone
send you a giant spider?

Anyway, I doubt
it would be alive.

There's no air holes.

Good point.

You open it.

It's chocolate.

A chocolate spider?

What kind of sicko
would send me that?

No, chocolate chocolates.

See?

"Pinchman's Simply Delicious
Organic Assorted Chocolates."

ARTHUR:
Hey, there's a card with it.

Mmm...

They lied.

They're complexly delicious.

I taste caramel, cashews,
a hint of lemon zest.

Paper?

I think you ate
the little cup it was in.

(blissfully):
I don't care.

"For someone I adore,

"A boy who's never a bore,

"Likes a good joke,
loves to eat,

Let me treat you
with something sweet."

Signed,
"Your Secret Admirer."

I love my secret admirer.

But who is it?

I don't know.

That's all it says.

It could be anyone out there.

BUSTER:
Sue Ellen?

BUSTER:
Prunella?

BUSTER:
That girl with red hair
who always reads upside down?

Binky?

You shouldn't litter.

Hey, chocolates!

Thanks!

Uh...

Okay, it's not Binky.

But I'm going to find out
who it is,

and when I do,
I'm going to thank them.

Is it you?

No.

Oh, drat!

BUSTER:
Arthur, I think I discovered
who my secret admirer is.

Look.

The words "secret admirer"
are actually an anagram

for "dream reciters."

What's a "dream reciter"?

A brotherhood of mystical beings
that peer into your dreams

and then recite them
at their meetings.

RECITER # :
And then Buster dreamt
he was being chased

by blue squirrels.

RECITER # :
And winged pigs,
who shot arrows at him.

RECITER # :
Sounds terrifying.

Let's send the poor kid
some chocolate.

Buster, there's no such thing
as a dream reciter.

But I might have
a clue for you.

I passed the candy store and I
saw a box of those chocolates.

They're really expensive.

BUSTER:
So, my secret admirer has
to be someone with money.

Muffy!

Could be.

Stranger things
have happened.

Thanks, Arthur.

(knock at door)

Entrez!

Package for you, Miss Muffy.

Ooh. Goody!

Ew!

"I know who you are,
it's plain to see,

Here's something in return,
I hope you like bologna."

Signed, "Your Secret Admirer."

(crunching)

There she is.

What? No tray?

Bring your own lunch today?

Here!

Keep your disgusting gift.

How did you know
it was me?

I know your handwriting, Buster.

And who else would send someone
half of a bologna sandwich?

I heard about
your chocolates,

and I am not your
secret admirer.

I am your very
un-secret disapprover.

You told her?

It might have slipped out.

(sighs)

Not Muffy.

She didn't even say
if she liked my poem.

Wait a minute.

Maybe the poem in the card
was a clue.

And who do we know
who writes poetry?

Fern?

Why not?

Look at her.

Meek, shy, retiring.

Not wanting anyone to know

about her feelings for the most
popular boy in school.

She's probably
writing a poem to me

as we speak.

I think all those chocolates
have affected your brain.

We'll see about that.

Hello, Fern.

Hey.

Mind if I join you?

Ah, spring.

It's September.

Right.

But spring is only...
seven months away.

Are you writing a poem?

Perhaps a poem to someone
you secretly admire?

No.

I'm writing a story about
someone who wakes up

and they're invisible.

At first it's great, but then
all they want is to be seen.

It's very sad.

Ah, yes.

We all want our true
identity revealed, don't we?

Buster, is there something
you want?

I'm kind of busy.

A book of knock-knock jokes?

Read the inscription.

"Knock-knock.

"Who's there?

"I know.

"I know who?

I know you're my
Secret Admirer."

That's a terrible
knock-knock joke.

And I'm not your secret admirer.

You're not?!

Not Fern.

It's not Muffy, it's not Fern,

it's not Sue Ellen,
it's not Molly.

You asked Molly?

That one was the worst.

I bought her a bunch
of heart-shaped balloons.

(loud pops)

Maybe you should
just drop it.

I can't.

It's eating away at me.

Someone out there
really admires me.

Wouldn't you want to know
who it is?

Ooh, it's Mr. Popular.

And he's all over
the cover of The Frensky Star.

Happy reading, Romeo.

"Who Is Buster's
Secret Admirer?

Who Cares!!"?

You're right.

I'll drop it.

(sighs)

I guess I'll never know.

There's a package
for you outside, Sweetie.

They couldn't fit it
through the door.

Who are you?

(Buster panting)

Come back,
secret admirer!

I just want to thank you.

(cat yowls)

(kids laughing)

Hello, Mr. Popular.

Me? Admire you?

Now, that's funny.

Roses are red,
violets are blue,

Rotten eggs stink,
and so do you.

(kids laughing)

I'm so embarrassed.

RECITER # :
All the clues are
there for thee...

RECITER # :
...to know the secret
admirer's identity.

RECITER # :
Look to the poem
and you shall see.

That's who it is!

(yawns)

Happy Fall Day.

Well, it took you long enough.

We have so many made-up holidays
we celebrate:

Baxter Day, Pink Sock Day,
Be-Nice-to-Pigeons Day...

That you completely forgot
about Fall Equinox Day,

when we surprise each other
with something sweet.

Hey, someone left an envelope
for you with the newspaper.

"Like a hand with a glove

"Or a sock with a show

"Very happy am I

Everyday with you."

Signed, "Your Secret Admirer."

I wonder who that could be.

Beats me.

(laughs)

(sheep bleating)

UNCLE MYLES:
Dear James and Molly,

Greetings from Scotland.

Today my biking tour
of the Lowlands

took me to Castle Kilflurgen,

home of the famous
Kilflurgen tapestry.

It tells the story
of some of our ancestors,

the MacDoogal-Donalds.

The castle was built
by Flurgen the Fantastic,

the first head of
the MacDoogal-Donald clan.

For many years, there was peace
and prosperity, but then,

Flurgen perished
when his haggis exploded

at the feast of St. Ninian.

After that there was a
succession of terrible rulers:

Kilgore the Dim,

Edna the Easily Amused,

Oliver the Walloper.

The animals fled
and drought seized the land.

It was a time of great despair.

Then one day, a lowly shepherd
boy came to Kilflurgen.

He was very timid
and couldn't see very well,

but he had magical powers.

He could talk with animals...

and summon the rains.

The villagers were so taken
with this shy, magical boy

that they appointed him
head of the clan

and called him
James the Squinty.

He was very generous,
kind and wise,

and prosperity reigned
for a thousand years.

"Here is a toy made
from the wool

"of one of the sheep that
graze about Kilflurgen.

"Legend says that it
will give the owner

"the powers and wisdom
of the shepherd boy.

"And Molly, here's a CD

from our local Scottish
punk band, Loch Tess."

Outstanding.

UNCLE MYLES:
Much love to both of you,
your Uncle Myles.

(Pal barks)

(frog croaks)

JAMES:
We need more blocks
for the castle.

Bring in the Royal Bulldozer.

(making bulldozer sounds)

Many thanks, Sir Liam.

(hiccups)

Methinks this will not be enough
blocks for the castle.

Methinks
we should get some more.

Boo!

Boo!

(hiccups)

Hey-- my lunch.

(hiccups)

What are you looking
at us for?

He stepped on it.

Yeah, we were just trying
to cure his hiccups.

You should thank us.

(hiccups)

What an ugly mouse.

Does it squeak
when you squeeze it?

It's not a mouse.

It's a lamb.

And it has magic powers.

What kind of
magic powers?

It's supposed to give you
the powers of this Scottish king

who could talk to animals
and make rain and stuff.

(both laughing)

Maybe your magic mouse-lamb
can unsmoosh your lunch.

(Tibbles laughing)

(making a raspberry)

(James sighs)

(hiccups twice)

Everyone knows that "boo"
doesn't cure hiccups.

You need something
really scary, like Arthur.

Help.

Help!

(shudders)

He was a "Frankentist."

I still have no idea what
it is, but it was terrifying.

Here, have one
of my madeleines.

Thanks, guys.

Well, I guess I can get rid
of this now.

(chirruping)

(slurping)

I can slurp louder
than you.

(slurps loudly)

Oh, yeah?

(slurps loudly)

Tommy, look.

(coughs)

What?

TIMMY:
Didn't James say
that his mouse-lamb

could make him talk
to animals?

You don't think it really
is magic, do you?

Nah, but we
better make sure.

That's it, guys.

The cafeteria is closed.

(hiccuping)

(gasps)

See?

It isn't a magic mouse-lamb.

It's just a plain mouse-lamb.

JAMES:
It's not
a "mouse-lamb."

It's just a lamb.

And it's mine!

Yeah, if it's magic, then
why doesn't it make it rain?

Huh? Huh?

(thunder)

Hey, Bro, you got
a quarter?

Did you see that?

He just pulled money
out of the lamb's mouth.

It really is magic.

All Hail King James!

(lamb bleats)

D.W.:
So then I said, "You're not
the boss of me."

And then Arthur said...

Hey!

Sorry.

King James needs more purple.

Huh?

I can't believe he took
my crayon.

Maybe
you're overreacting.

I've seen this
before, Emily.

Like when Mom and Dad
leave Arthur in charge.

He goes mad with power.

(bleats)

That's all the crayons
in the kingdom, sire.

Shall we draw now,
Your Lambness?

No.

I just like to look at them.

(laughing maniacally)

(thunder)

(panting)

Excuse me, Your Grace.

The people are hungry.

They have no bread.

Then let them eat madeleines.

Actually, I don't like
madeleines.

They're so sweet, you know.

Gather all the madeleines
in the land and stomp them!

Ooh, I love stomping!

Enough!

We'll never give you
our desserts.

This time
you've gone too far.

You can't tell me
what to do.

I am the king.

By the power of this lamb,
I hereby sentence D.W.

to clean out all the unicorn
stables in the land.

(laughing)

Why would anyone stomp
on madeleines?

Maybe I am overreacting.

James is our friend.

You should just
go talk to him.

(bleats)

Is James home?

He's upstairs with the Tibbles,

reenacting fairy tales
or something.

Halt! Who goes there?

You know who I am, Tommy.

What's the password?

Ridiculous.

That's right.

Okay, you can enter.

Hey, D.W.

We're playing King.

Want to join us?

Uh, no.

I actually came by to tell you
to stop acting like a king.

It's kind of annoying.

And funny-looking.

Well, maybe I like being king.

Is there a problem here,
Your Lambness?

No-- D.W. was just leaving.

What?!

But I...

You heard King James.

Now move it, or I'll sweep you.

So? How did it go
with James?

See for yourself.

Ahh!

(slurps)

Oh, dear.

This is not good.

Remove yourselves
from the swings, pheasants.

It's "peasants."

Peasants.

Come on, beat it.

The king wants to swing.

Is this how you treat
your friends, James?

Why are you acting like this?

Do you enjoy being mean?

TIMMY:
Come on, Your Majesty.

Let's race.

TOMMY:
Slow down, Timmy.

You're not supposed to go
higher than the king.

Let's go someplace else.

I don't like this view.

Hey, King,
what's the matter?

Why aren't you smashing
anything?

He wants something
better to smash.

(Liam hiccuping
and making bulldozer sounds)

There. Smash that, King.

TIMMY:
Yeah, yeah.

Do it, do it, do it!

(crying)

Here, Liam.

Sorry.

(rock music playing faintly)

JAMES:
Here. Take it.

I don't want it anymore.

What?

Why don't you want it anymore?

'Cause I don't want to be king.

The lamb gave me magic powers,

and all they've done
is made me miserable.

That was a legend, Bro--
as in not real.

Anyway, if you remember,

the shepherd boy
wasn't just magical,

he was also kind
and generous.

Hmm.

I haven't been so good
at that part.

(lamb bleats)

Good morning, King James.

What are we going
to smash today?

Nothing.
You're both fired.

(hiccuping
and making bulldozer sounds)

(hiccups)

Here, Liam.

I'm giving you the lamb.

Be a kind and generous king.

I don't want that thing!

Get it away.

Hey! My hiccups are gone.

You cured me.

Thank you, James.

Welcome back, James.

Thanks.

So is it going to rain today,
Your Highness?

Don't call me that.

Ever.