12x05 - The Chronicles of Buster/On This Spot

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♪ Every day, when you're
walking down the street ♪

♪ Everybody that you meet
has an original point of view ♪

(laughing)

♪ And I say, hey ♪
Hey!

♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

♪ If you could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

♪ You got to listen to
your heart, listen to the beat ♪

♪ Listen to the rhythm,
the rhythm of the street ♪

♪ Open up your eyes,
open up your ears ♪

♪ Get together and make things
better by working together ♪

♪ It's a simple message,
and it comes from the heart ♪

♪ Believe in yourself ♪
♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ For that's the place
to start ♪
♪ Place to start ♪

♪ And I say, hey ♪
Hey!

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

♪ If you can learn to work
and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind
of day. ♪

Hey!

ARTHUR (over TV):
Hey, D.W.!

Hey!

Whoa!
(loud thud)

(letters shattering)

ANNOUNCER:
Now, for the first time on DVD,

the Super-Extended
Collector's Edition

of the blockbuster ten-part
fantasy epic,

The Chronicles of Ahmayzzia.

You saw them in theaters.

You saw them on DVD.

Then you saw them in -D Imax.

But you've never seen them

in the Super-Extended
Collector's Edition

with behind-the-scenes
documentaries,

special effects secrets,
and commentary by the directors,

the actors,
the technical crew,

and some folks we dragged in
off the street.

Marvel once more to the story
of Will Nobody,

the ordinary eight-year-old boy
who falls through his toy chest

into the land of Ahmayzzia,
where he discovers

he was the Prince of Light,

destined to save Ahmayzzia
from Pordro, Lord of Darkness!

And, if you purchase

the Super-Extended
Collector's Edition now,

you will receive a free bonus
dolly to carry it on...

And a handy
neck-arm-chest-and-leg massager

to keep that blood circulating
while you enjoy all , hours

of Super-Extended Ahmayzzian
excitement!

The Chronicles of Ahmayzzia--
see it once more, today.

Wow.

Hey!

BUSTER:
Remember how after Endengorn
gives him the Crown of Phlüüg

and the Crystal Staff,

Will Nobody finds
out he's got all
these powers?

Uh-huh.

Well, in the Super-Extended
Collector's Edition,

you find out
the Crystal Staff

doesn't just channel
the power of the sun,

it also gives Will
the power to fly.

Oh, cool.

BUSTER:
In the commentary,

the director said they cut
the flying part out

because the movie was too long,

but they put all those scenes
back in the Collector's Edition.

I've only seen them with the
director's commentary, though.

I still want to watch 'em
with all the other...

You better hurry
or you're going
to miss gym class.

...with Endengorn
and Durroghin!

You've missed
the first hours,

but there are
still hours to...

BUSTER:
What's that?

Ah, joining us at last,
are you, boys?

Well, come on,
get in line.

(whispering):
What is this?

Mr. Ratburn said we're
going to start rock climbing.

But I've never
done that before.

Doesn't he have to
teach it to us first?

He just wants to see
what our skill level is,

then he's going to pair
us up for the lessons.

He says if we all
get good enough,

he'll take us
on a field trip
to Mount Krakauer!

Whoa!

ARTHUR:
Don't be
nervous, Buster.

Just think of what
Will Nobody would do.

Fly.

Ah!
(all gasping)

Good try, Arthur.

Not everybody gets it
the first time around.

Or the first
times.

It's a lot harder
than it looks.

You don't have to tell me.

BUSTER:
I don't think we have
enough time.

Maybe next class.

Don't worry,

I'll bring you down
before the bell rings.

(gulps)

How am I doing?

Good.
!
(applause)

You did very well.

His fingers
are eightfold,

his years
are the same.

He's born of two parents;
Nobody's his name.

It's you!

ARTHUR:
Boy, you were so
amazing, Buster.

Did you ever think you could
climb like that?

I'm glad Mr. Ratburn
paired us together.

Maybe some of your
skills will rub off.

He said he'd be
around on weekends

if we wanted to
practice at the gym.

Want to?

Hmm?

Oh, look at that!

WILL (on TV):
The Crown of Phlüüg

was always getting tangled
in something.

We had to do, like, takes
of this scene.

One time Endengorn
almost poked my eye out.

Oh, yeah, I guess
that was this time.

Oh yeah,
that's funny.

But... so will you
practice with me

on Saturdays?

Buster?

Sure. Of course.

WILL (on TV):
This is how we shot my battle
with the Winged Raithmorg

before the special effects
were put in.

It'll take, um, more than...
uh... um...

Line?

And this is the scene
with the effects.

It'll take more than that

to destroy the Crystal Staff!
(phone ringing)

Hello?

ARTHUR (on phone):
Buster, where are you?

It's : .

I've been waiting at the gym
for you for an hour.

Oh, sorry, I was, um...

Hey, you know what?

Now they're showing how they did
the special effects.

They just film Will in front of
this big green sheet and then...

ARTHUR (on phone):
This is the fourth time
you haven't shown up.

We really need to practice
as a team

or we won't get to go
to Mount Krakauer.

Don't worry, I'm coming.

WILL (on TV):
On the day we shot this scene,

I had a tuna sandwich
for lunch.

No, wait, I think it was
ham and cheese.

And then,
in the scene...

Okay, open hand grip.

Now hand-foot match...

Buster, pick up the slack!

BUSTER:
...just makes
the story...

ARTHUR:
Ahhhh!

What? Oh!

Sorry.

Buster, it's
very important

to pick up the slack
on the belay rope.

Are you okay,
Arthur?

Yeah, it was
only a few feet.

You boys are going to have
to get your act together

if you want to make it
to the Krakauer climb.

What do I keep telling
you about this?

Practice.

Practice.

Okay, Arthur, I promise
I'll make it this Saturday.

You say that
every week!

And then every week
I come to the gym and...

You know, there's a scene in
Ahmayzzia just like this.

Endengorn is drowning in...

Enough with
Ahmayzzia already!

It's not my fault he can't get
the hang of it.

I'm sorry, Arthur, if I can
climb and you can't.

Don't take it out on me.

I wonder if Will Nobody's
friends got mad at him

for having all those
great powers.

Maybe there's something
in the commentary about that.

WILL:
I had a toothache when
we shot this scene,

so my agent made a dentist's
appointment for...

what was it, Jane? : ? : ?

(screams)

Must have fallen asleep.

Oh, disc's finished.

Guess it's time for disc .

That's weird.

Where are all the DVDs?

(screaming)

Where am I?

Get off me!

Endengorn?

Who else would I be,
you long-eared,

eight-fingered...

Is this Ahmayzzia?

Eight fingers,

long ears...

It's him!
It's him!

He's here, everyone!

ELVES:
It's Long Ears!
The Long-Eared One!

You're the one
in the prophecy.

Me?

We must give you the test
to be sure.

Eight full hours
without blinking.

Amazing!
He is the one!

I could watch all ,
hours if you'd let me.

Of course!
But later.

First, you must save us
from the All-Seeing...

Eye, I know.

No, eyes.

That's not the
Dark Lord Pordro.

Pordro's on vacation.

His cousin Arthro is
substituting for him,

and he is even
more evil.

More evil?

Arthro is using
his dark powers

to turn all our televisions
and DVD players to stone!

(gasps)
You mean...

Even a mere whisper of
Collector's Edition commentary

elicits his wrath.

The television we had you watch

is one of the few
still in existence.

(gasps)

Save us, please.

Or we'll never get to watch
the last hours.

The Crystal Staff!

Cool.

(clears throat)

Oh, sorry.

Your days are numbered, Arthro!

ARTHRO:
Ah, the Long-Eared One
from the prophecy!

Take that!

It'll take more than that
to destroy the Crystal...

Aha, victory!

Are you squirming in defeat,
my long-eared...

Nope!

Just wanted to show how good
a climber I was.

Can you do this?

Uh, I prefer the elevator.

Arthur?

You're the one turning all
the televisions into stone?

But why?

Because they were
getting in the way

of our friendship.

All you ever do is
watch that silly DVD.

It's not silly.

It created all this.

MR. RATBURNDRO:
Not so fast, Long Ears!

Mr. Ratburn!

No, I'm Mr. Ratburndro.

He's my new partner.

I was hoping it could be you,

but since you
wouldn't help me...

Good partners share their powers
and practice with each other.

That's definitely not you.

And that's why
we're going to vaporize you.

Sorry.

Come on, guys.
Lighten up.

(Buster screams)

(telephone ringing)

Aah!

Okay, Arthur, I know,
I know, I'll be right...

WILL NOBODY (on TV):
Let me get this.

Hello?

Oh hi, Alex.

No, you're not interrupting.

I'm just doing this DVD
commentary.

Come on,
let's go practice!

It's not Saturday.

I know, but there's still
a few hours before dinner.

And Mr. Ratburn's at the gym--
I checked.

What, did your DVD player break?

No, I just...
I had a kind of vision.

You know, like that scene

where Durroghin goes to
the Temple of Yurrk and then...

I mean, I just realized
I've been selfish.

So, do you want to go
practice... maybe?

Gotcha!

Thanks, Buster.

Sorry you had to miss
all those hours of your DVD.

Oh, I've seen
enough Ahmayzzia
for a while, I think.

I like it better seeing
something like this...

BUSTER:
♪ You're in them,
you make them ♪

♪ You sh**t them,
it's "Postcards from You"... ♪

And now, a video from you.

♪ It's "Postcards from You" ♪

This postcard was made
by the kids at:

GIRL:
We thought it would be a good
idea to make a nice, warm meal

for homeless men.

We have meatballs.

They don't get as much nutrition
as we do, normally.

It's taken us about four
months to organize this

and get it all ready.

Apple juice...

milk...

and cider.

BUSTER:
Our next postcard comes from:

(jazz music playing)

BUSTER:
To see more
"Postcards from You,"

visit pbskidsgo.org.

(T. Rex roars)

(screeches)

(roars)

(screeches)

Have you ever thought about
what might have happened

right where you're sitting?

It could have been something
like this...

Or this...

Or this...

Okay, I'm getting ahead
of myself.

But anything and everything
could have happened

right where you're sitting.

MR. RATBURN:
...and perhaps the greatest

of all the Lakota chiefs was
Tatanka-Iyotanka,

better known as Sitting Bull.

Famous for helping defeat
Custer's army regiment in

before moving with his people
to safety in Saskatchewan,

he was a brilliant military
strategist and leader.

On a side note, a friend told me

that Sitting Bull stopped
in Elwood City

when he was touring with Buffalo
Bill in his Wild West Show.

(school bell rings)

Okay, class, remember to read
chapter ten for tomorrow.

ARTHUR:
Isn't that cool?

Sitting Bull stopping
right here in Elwood City.

Did you have the
fish sticks today?

Ugh, they were
terrible!

It tasted like cat food.
I mean, he was one
of the most important

Native American
chiefs ever.

I've tried cat food,
and cat food is better.

Are you guys even listening?

School's over.

Maybe I'll bring
my own lunch tomorrow.

BUSTER:
But tomorrow is
Boston Cream Pie Day.

ARTHUR:
Search for Sitting Bull
and Elwood City...

"It is believed that Sitting
Bull performed with Buffalo Bill

on the banks of Mill Creek
in ."

Cool!

There's even a picture

of the program for the show.

Dusty buckets!

This tonic you done sold me

tastes like something
you give a sick cat!

Well, in fact, I do
give it to my cat

and he's years old
and fit as a fiddle.

So drink up!

Shh! Keep it
down, you two.

Sitting Bull
is coming.

(applause)

When I was a boy, the Sioux
owned the world.

The sun rose
and set on their land.

Now, I'm doing this.

Oh well, got to give the
audience what they want.

(crowd cheering)

And I'm pretty sure this is
where the old fairground was.

This tree looks
like the same one

in this photo
I found online.

And now it's on the edge
of a parking lot

of the biggest mall
in Elwood City.

Now, that's what
I call progress.

So what?

So Sitting Bull might
have stood here.

It happened, like,
hundreds of years ago.

Actually, it was only
years ago.

It just seems like something
people should know.

Arthur's right.

All sorts of historically
important things

have happened in Elwood City.

You know the actor
Derek Montaigne?

(both gasp)

You mean the star of
Summer School Musical?

And Buccaneers of the Bahamas
Part IV?

He was sitting on the bench

outside the Sugar Bowl
just last week.

Our mailman saw him.

That's not historically
important!

Arthur, Derek Montaigne was
voted cutest new star

by 'Tween Times!

And he does all his own stunts.

I have to see that
bench right now.

There might still be some lint
on it from Derek's pants.

It's not easy to make
people listen.

Who's Derek Montaigne?

Just some goofy
teenage actor.

You're way more
important than he is.

You're darn
right I am.

Hmm, a plaque
to commemorate me

would look very
nice right here.

See what
you can do.

RATBURN:
Excellent research, Arthur.

They really do seem
like the same tree.

Do you think we could get
the spot made into a landmark?

I don't know.

But I know who would--
Seymour Turkel.

He wrote this book.

You should pay him
a visit.

"Elwood City: From the Mesozoic
to the Present."

(grunts)

It's even heavier than
a Henry Screever book.

Yes, Seymour is very thorough.

I think you'll like him.

He tells the most
amazing stories.

Just be careful
where you sit.

Hmm?

TURKEL:
According to the
most recent bylaws

of Elwood City,

all you need to designate a
local landmark is an S- form.

A form?
That's all we need?

Yep. That and
, signatures.

Oh...

(cat yowls)

(yowls)

But don't give up.

Did you know that Sitting Bull

was a very courageous
Lakota leader?

I think he would appreciate
your persistence.

There. You've got
your first signature.

(cat meowing)

(cat purring)

ARTHUR:
Excuse me, sir.

Would you care to sign
a petition

for a landmark
to commemorate Sitting Bull?

You're never going to get
any signatures like that.

Here, watch me.

Do you care about animals?

I guess so.

Good-- then sign this.

It's to save kittens.

D.W., this petition
doesn't say anything
about kittens.

But kittens are cute.

Who wouldn't want
a landmark for a kitten?

Hey, it's a tour!

BUSTER:
This way, everyone.

Stick with your partner.

We are now at the corner
of Maple and Elm,

where some claim to have seen

Derek Montaigne
cross the street.

ARTHUR:
Buster,

what are
you doing?

Oh, hey, Arthur.

Want to join
the Derek Montaigne tour?

The bench is coming up.

(giggles)

That's the best part.

Why on earth would I go
on a tour to see a bench?

I don't know.
It's free?

But I am charging
ten cents for the map.

It shows all the spots
where someone saw--

or thinks they saw--
Derek in Elwood City.

Pretty cool, huh?

Okay, everyone,
next up, number eight,

where Derek Montaigne
may have received a call

from Matt Damon.

There-- I got you
another signature.

Great.

Only to go.

Sign a petition to commemorate
Sitting Bull in Elwood City?

(sighs)

You're still
collecting signatures

for that Sitting
Bull landmark?

It's been a hundred years!

Only one more to go.

Hey, wait!

You haven't signed it yet.

Here!

Oh, no!

Come back!
That's my life's work!

(clears his throat)

Pop quiz.

Wha...!

That always wakes
them up.

Good location, Arthur.

How many signatures
have you got so far?

Only , and most of them
were from people I know.

Keep at it.

Rome wasn't built
in a day.

In the meantime,
want to take a break

and see some of Elwood City's
other historical attractions?

Okay.

RATBURN:
And don't worry.

I'll have at least ten more
signatures on here

by the time you're finished.

TURKEL:
And that's why this body
of water was called Mill Creek--

because of that flour mill.

You can still see some of
the old water wheel over there.

(shutter clicks)

This football field
is built on the site

of a trading post,

where the Lenape Indians
swapped furs with the townsfolk

for goods like pots,
pans, clothes...

(camera shutter clicks,
cow moos)

They discovered the bones
when they broke ground

on the recycling center.

It was the largest
dinosaur skeleton

ever found
in this region.

(shutter clicks)

(dinosaur roars)

Thanks, Mr. Turkel.

See you tomorrow.

BUSTER:
Ladies and gentlemen,

it's my great pleasure
to introduce

Mr. Higgins, the mailman.

Now, Mr. Higgins,
describe the moment

when you first
saw Derek Montaigne.

I knew it was him because
I'd just seen that musical

and... holy macaroni!

There he is!

(whistling)

(everyone gasps)

BUSTER:
That's not Derek Montaigne.

That's Gus, the pizza
delivery boy.

Hmm... I could have
sworn it was him.

(crowd grumbling)

Hey, wait!

I can show you
some other things.

Mr. Rogers once stayed there.

Guess you should have
checked your facts first.

I was really enjoying
being a tour guide, too.

And what am I supposed
to do with all these maps now?

Use them as scratch
paper, I guess.

It's a good map, though.

Did you draw it yourself?

Yeah, I copied a tourist map and
then made my own adjustments.

Buster, this is a great idea!

It is?

But it wasn't
Derek Montaigne.

Who's going to want
to take the "Pizza
Delivery Boy" tour?

That's not what I mean.

Come on-- we're going
to make a new map.

(cat meowing)

(purring)

Next up, number nine

on the "It Happened in Elwood
City" walking tour--

the spot where Sitting Bull
performed

in Buffalo Bill's
Wild West Show.

And now, a few words from
our local history expert,

Arthur Read.

I am not an expert.

Anyway, Sitting Bull was
born around

in present-day South Dakota.

(applause)

FRANCINE:
That was great.

I don't think I'll ever
look at this parking lot

the same way again.

You know, Sitting
Bull's life would
make a terrific movie.

And you know who
could play him?

Derek Montaigne!

Yeah, I heard
his mom's part Cherokee.

BUSTER:
Okay, everyone, this way.

We've got more
history to see.

We're up to
signatures.

Who knows?

In a month or two,

this place might get
some official recognition.

Well, I thought I'd have
a plaque for you by now.

But I guess it's going
to take a little more time.

That's okay.

It's good that your friends
know about the people

who lived in this country
before them

and still live here today.

Are there any Native Americans
living today in Elwood City?

Oh, sure.

In fact, that Ratburn
fellow looks a lot

like a Cheyenne I used to know
named Tahmelapachme.

That means "dull knife."

(chuckles)

Hi, everyone, it's me, Buster.

We always have something
to dance about in Elwood City,

but you won't believe all
the cool dances people are doing

all around the country.

On my trip with my dad,

I see people rock, stomp, twirl,
pop and boogie to the beat.

I'm filming all the groovy fun

and sending it back
to my friends in Elwood City

on my very own video postcards.

They're Postcards from Buster.

♪ Every day when you're
walking down the street ♪

♪ And everybody that you meet ♪

♪ Has an original
point of view ♪

♪ And I say, hey ♪
♪ Hey! ♪

♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

♪ If we could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

♪ Hey! ♪
♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

♪ Hey! ♪
♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

♪ Hey! ♪