11x06 - The Making of Arthur/Dancing Fools

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♪ Every day when you're
walking down the street ♪

♪ Everybody that you meet
has an original point of view ♪

(laughing)

♪ And I say hey ♪
Hey!

♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

♪ If we could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

♪ You got to listen to
your heart, listen to the beat ♪

♪ Listen to the rhythm,
the rhythm of the street ♪

♪ Open up your eyes,
open up your ears ♪

♪ Get together and make things
better by working together ♪

♪ It's a simple message,
and it comes from the heart ♪

♪ Oh, believe in yourself ♪
♪ Believe in yourself ♪

♪ For that's the place
to start ♪
♪ Place to start ♪

♪ And I say, hey ♪
Hey!

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

♪ If we could learn to work
and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪

Hey!
♪ What a wonderful kind
of day. ♪

Hey!

ARTHUR (over TV):
Hey, D.W.!

Hey!

Whoa!
(loud thud)

(letters shattering)

Welcome to the broadcast.

You've won Hollywood's
top honors.

You've worked with some of
the best directors in the world.

Matt Damon...

what drives you?

Well, Casey,

I prefer to ride my bike
whenever I can.

(laughing)

(clearing throat)

This seems like
a good opportunity

to talk about my new project.

It's called
"Postcards from You."

I want kids from all
over the country

to send me one-minute
videos they make.

I'll pick a few
and air them on TV.

Does that sound like fun?

It sure does.

To enter, just e-mail us

and we'll send you
the guidelines

and you can start filming.

Matt Damon, always
a pleasure.

Actually, this is
the first time I've
been on your show.

But thank you.

Time for bed.

ARTHUR:
Something I made

could actually be on TV?

Imagine how cool
that would be.

Oh, I don't have
a video camera.

You can borrow mine.

It's not the latest model,
but it works.

Sleep tight.

I wonder what I should film.

Hey, maybe I should
make it about you.

(barks)

(screams)

Congratulations.

You're all invited
to audition

to be extras in
the video I'm making
for Matt Damon.

I'm entering
that contest, too.

All you have to do is send in
a one-minute video

about something interesting
in your life.

Don't waste your time.

My daddy sold a car

to Matt Damon's
lawyer's assistant.

So I'm pretty much
guaranteed to win.

But you would be fabulous
as "Average Kid # ."

I wonder what I could
film for one minute

that would be
of scientific value.

(sneezes)

That's it.

I have the
perfect subject

for my video... you.

Why me?

Why not?

You're very interesting.

Besides, I don't think
I could get footage

of a real alien in time.

What's yours going to be about,

Arthur Read?

You'll just have
to wait and see.

Every morning Pal starts off

with a bowl of delicious
beef-flavored kibble.

That's your cue, D.W.

♪ La-la-la-la. ♪

Good morning, Arthur's
smelly dog.

Even though you've been
very, very bad,

I'll grant you
with breakfast anyway.

ARTHUR:
Cut.

Why are you
dressed like that?

And what's lettuce doing
in Pal's bowl?

I'm the Breakfast Fairy.

And your dog eats
too much meat.

He should have a salad
once in awhile.

There are not going
to be any fairies

in my movie.

It's our movie.

Mom said I could help, too.

Guys, you're missing
a great nature video.

The squirrel--
known to scientists

as, uh...
squirrelus squirrelisimus,

tries to make a meal out of
the dog's unwanted breakfast...

(barking)

He fails.

The Read yard
is indeed

a hostile environment.

Now that your star

is off catching
a case of rabies,

can we please
film my idea?

And now, presenting
the lovely Nadini--

who for her first trick
will produce a pig out of a hat.

(squealing)

Wonderful... amazing!

Oh, two of clubs?

That was the card
I was thinking of!

This Nadini's not bad

for someone who isn't
even real.

What do you think, Arthur Read?

I think we need more ideas.

The sneeze is one of the most
fascinating responses

in the body.

(sneezing)

Now watch the same image
slowed down

to a quarter of the speed.

The air coming out of his nose

is spewing , bacteria
into the air.

That's your video?

I was going to have George
sneeze multiple times,

but he had to work
on his own project.

Hey, you guys could be
my new test subjects.

I have to go wash my pants.

Yeah, I'm late for...

um, something.

Come on, I even
have pepper.

Welcome
to This Old Dollhouse.

I'm your host,
George Lundgren.

So Miss Molina, what is it
you want to do with this house?

It's too small for Raulito.

He wants a barn
put on the side.

But it should look
like a castle.

Uh, that could be
a little difficult.

But hey, I notice you have
some rot over here.

So what we're going to do
is remove this side, and...

What are you doing?!

I-I'm just trying to fix it!

You're destroying
Raulito's house!

You monster!

Alberto!

BUSTER:
Arthur sips the last
of his smoothie,

trying to come up
with a new idea.

But his head's as
empty as his glass.

Would you cut that out?!

Ooh, that was good,

but you moved your
head out of the frame.

I'm serious.

The deadline for the video
is in three days

and I still don't
know what to sh**t.

You'll come up
with something.

Have some
mozzarella sticks.

I haven't filmed
you eating yet.

That's it!

...et voilà!

That is how you make
David Read's

Lighter-Than-Air
Chocolate Soufflé!

Wait! It's not
finished!

(sighs)

Thank you, Sprinkle Fairy.

ARTHUR:
Cut!

D.W., you ruined
the shot.

Now we have to
start all over.

You can just
edit it out.

Yeah, smarty-pants.

We can just edit it out.

What's an edit,
and how do we get it out?

Editing is where you take
all the stuff you filmed

and cut it up
so it's fun to watch.

Come on, I'll show you.

First, you have to cut out
the boring parts

or anything you don't want
people to see.

(chuckles)

(rock music playing)
Then you add in
some background music...

You can also add in some cool
graphics for your title.

Finally, after hours
and hours of work,

you're done.

Arthur Read leaves
his house

with his finished
one-minute video.

All his hopes and dreams
are in that envelope.

Don't you think you have
enough footage of me by now?

I never got a shot of you
brushing your teeth.

But I guess you're right.

Good-bye, Arthur.

You've been
a wonderful subject.

(sobbing):
I'm really going
to miss you.

I'm your best friend.

I see you every day.

Oh, yeah.

Well, good luck.

You included one to Matt's
cat stylist, right?

Hey, Muffy.

How did your video go?

It was exhausting.

The special effects
took forever.

You had special effects?

Of course.

How can you do Muffy--
the Umpire Slayer

without a baseball team
of flying vampire zombies?

Is that yours?

Yeah.

It's my Dad making
a chocolate soufflé.

A cooking video?

Well, there's
always cable.

Ciao!

DAMON:
Moby d*ck? Sure, I'll do it.

But I want %
of the back end...

and I want to be the whale.

Script for you,
Mr. Damon.

It's by someone named...

Arthur Read.

(spits)

Arthur Read?!

Oh, I remember that kid's
one-minute video.

It was terrible.

You tell Arthur Read

that he'll never eat lunch
in this town again.

He's not from this town.

He's from Elwood City.

Well, tell him he can't
eat lunch there, either.

Uh-huh,
yes, sir.

Right away, Mr. Damon.

(plate breaks)

(gasps)

You should unwrap
the chocolate bar
before you make

another soufflé.

It'll get foily.

I'm not cooking, D.W.

I'm just doing a little
more work on the video.

But we finished it.

I decided that it needs
more, um, pizzazz.

See, if I only sh**t one frame
of video at a time

and move these objects
a little between each frame,

it will look like
they're moving on their own.

It's a special effect
called stop-motion animation.

That doesn't seem
very special.

Hey, maybe the Glitter Fairy
could come sprinkle some...

No!

Hmm! Well,
if you ask me,

what we did before
was just fine.

Oh!

VOICE ON VIDEO:
We're delicious!

(laughs)

(sighs):
It'll have to do.

"Are you sure you want
to delete this?"

Sure, I'm sure.

What have I done?!

Hello.

Buster, I wanted to work
on the video some more,

but I pressed "delete"
instead of "save,"

and now I don't have...

You mean you erased
the whole video?

That's great!

How is that great?

You can share my project.

I have to edit hours
of footage down to one minute.

I need help.

You don't really think
there's a chance

we could win,
do you?

Who knows?

They put Mary Moo Cow
on TV.

Why not you?

Take that, you demon creature
from Cooperstown!

(evil laughter)

To reach home, you must face
Vladimira the umpire!

(shrieks)

Your credit card,
it's blinding me!

By the power
of King Midas,

I banish thee forever
and for all time!

DAMON:
What are they teaching
kids these days?

Didn't a Crosswire sell your
lawyer's assistant a car once?

Oh, yeah. (chuckles)
What a lemon.

The last one.

Arthur: The Story of a Kid,
His Sister and His Friends.

Well,

at least it doesn't
sound fake.

Let's give it a shot.

Yes?

Hi, does an Arthur Read
live here?

(gasps)

You're Matt Damon!

Arthur's not here.

He moved to Alaska...
or Venus,

but he said you could
put me on TV instead.

Did I win?

Is my video going to be on TV?!

Uh, no. We're going
with someone named
George Lundgren,

but since we're
passing through,

we wanted to speak to you and
your parents about something.

I loved your video,
and, well, I was hoping

we could make it
into a whole TV show.

Wow!

(whistles)

Let's get a shot
of you and your dog walking

on the sidewalk in front
of the house.

♪ Every day when you're walking
down the street ♪

♪ And everybody that you meet ♪

♪ Has an original point
of view. ♪

BUSTER:
♪ You're in them,
you sh**t them, you make them ♪

♪ It's "Postcards from You" ♪

♪ It's "Postcards from You." ♪

This "Postcard from You"
was made by kids

at the Delano Optional School
in Memphis, Tennessee.

Hi, Buster, it's Bryonik,
and I'm here with...

Jaffrin.
Janay.

Nathan.
And Miles.

Let's go see if we can find
some celebrities!

Whoo!

Come on, everybody, let's go.

That's The Peabody.

I heard a lot of celebrities
stay at this hotel.

What do you like best
about working with celebrities?

Celebrities are a lot of fun
because, you know,

everybody comes to see
the celebrities,

so there's a lot of picture-
taking, a lot of filming.

Oh, my gosh!

Ducks!
Ducks!

BUSTER:
Our next postcard
comes from kids

at the Boys' and Girl's Club
in Lewiston, Idaho.

My name is Vikalte
and we are in Lewiston, Idaho.

Lewiston is where
Lewis and Clark passed by

to get to the Pacific Ocean.

Now we're going to take
a journey

back into the year of .

Here we go.

Here we have Meriwether Lewis
and William Clark.

They're chopping down trees
to make canoes

for the long journey.

Up there is Chief Twisted Hair
giving them directions.

Pull that axe out!

My name is Sacagawea
and I helped Lewis and Clark

to guide them on their journey.

And this is my husband
Charbonneau.

(gasps)

Look, it's the ocean!

It's so beautiful.

Sometimes two people can do
something together much better

than if they did it alone.

Like Lewis and Clark.

Would they have
discovered so much

if Clark had set out alone?

Drat! Now, where did I
put that compass?

Then there's Buster and me.

We're each pretty funny,
but when we get together,

we're hysterical.

(laughing)

And then
the lobster says...

"Who you calling
'Crabby,' shrimp?"

But there's two people
who I could never ever imagine

being good at anything
together.

You ready?

Ready as I'll
ever be.

Let's do it.

(cheering and applause)

Hi, Francine.

Are you ready
for dance class?

For what?

Dance class.

Oops, I forgot to tell you.

I signed you up
for dance lessons

at the community center.

You did what?!

I'm not taking
dance lessons.

Go unsign me!

I can't.

And it just so happens
that you owe me.

In September, I gave you
my spot in the lunch line.

And here, October second,
I lent you three dollars.

Even at a conservative
interest rate,

that comes to $ . .

Fine. I'll write
you an I.O.U.

Please, Francine,

I need to have one
friend in the class.

I'll get us hockey tickets.

Behind the penalty box?

Anywhere you want.

All right.

Gave Francine hockey tickets.

(flamenco music playing)

(music stops)

Every dance tells a story.

That was the flamenco,

and it told a story
of love and revenge.

My story's going to be about
a girl who died of boredom.

Everyone find a partner.

Hold on, Muffy.

I'm going to put you
with Otis over there.

And Francine, uh, George.

Perfecto.

I didn't choose
to be here,

so don't get
the impression

I'm enjoying
any of this.

I'm only here

because my mom's friends
with Mrs. Molina.

I'd lose an antler
to get out of it.

Remember, everyone,

it's back, left,
together.

One, two, three,
one, two, three...

You're not letting me lead.

I thought
I was supposed to lead.

Please-- Crosswires
never follow.

Ow! Tommy,
you're on my toe!

Ugh! Why did I have
to get stuck

with the worst dancer
in the class?

Ow!

Make that the worst
two dancers in the class.

BOTH:
One, two, three,
one, two, three.

One, two, three.

Very nice, but keep
your heads up.

Hey, I heard you guys
were really good

in dance class
yesterday.

BOTH:
What?!

D.W. said you were the only ones

who didn't trip
on each other's toes.

Uh, my soup's
getting cold!

(teasing):
So, did you guys learn
how to slow-dance?

If you tell anyone
about this, so help me...

MUFFY:
Francine!

Over here.

I want to talk
about our dance class.

(groans)

BINKY:
Hey, dancer boy,

want to show me some moves?

Give that back!

I mean it. Show me
what you've learned.

Well, we were working
on the waltz.

You go, one...

Not here!

Everyone's watching.

Binky, why don't you
just take the class?

Mrs. Molina said there's
still space available.

Hmm.

BINKY:
So, instead of
being grounded,

my parents made me
take this dance class!

What rotten luck, right?

(Mrs. Molina clapping)

Okay, everyone.

Find your partner.

(all whispering)

No, George.

Francine said
you're mine today.

"Yours"?

(waltz music playing)

(screams)

George!

Sorry.

You were supposed to hold on.

Grand jeté!

Grand jeté!

Binky, I think we're supposed
to be dancing together.

Then you better keep up, sister!

Ball change,
step, kick...

Jazz hands,
jazz hands...

Jazz hands,
jazz...

Francine's
right, Binky.

This is ballroom dancing.

You have to communicate
with your partner.

I think George was
a better fit for you.

You can keep him!

He must have had
beginner's luck yesterday,

because he's terrible now.

All right, niños, from the top.

(waltz music playing)

(upbeat tune playing)

(cheering and applause)

Excellent foxtrot!

Okay, class, let's see if we can
do it like George and Francine.

Would you be interested

in entering a competition?

A dance competition?

With a ball gown and a tiara?

I think the dancers do get to
choose their own costume, but...

I'm in.

Where do I
sign up?

Muffy,
she was talking to us.

Each class can only
enter one pair.

If it were two,
I would definitely

consider you
and Binky.

What's the prize?

The Fred-and-Ginger award!

Ramon and I won it years ago.

BOTH:
We'll do it!

(Muffy sobbing)

What?

Is this because
I dropped you on the dip?

I said I was sorry.

It's Francine!

I just wanted a friend
in the class

and now she's better than me.

It's so rude.

Yeah, and that George
thinks he's so cool.

If it were just me and him,
I could dance his socks off!

If I can't be in
that contest,

then Francine isn't going
to be in it, either.

And neither is George.

BINKY:
Well, well, well.

If it isn't
Twinkle Toes!

So, you think

you can dance
better than me, huh?

Binky,

what are you doing out here
dressed like that?

It's freezing!

(funky beat playing)

Can you do this,
Big Horns?

(panting):
What'd you think
of that?

Walking away, huh?

Is that all you got?

What do you call that move?

The Chicken?

(laughing)

(groans)

MUFFY:
Two hockey tickets--

right behind
the penalty box.

Just like I promised.

That's amazing!

When are we going?

Oh.

These are for the night
of the dance competition.

It was all Daddy could get.

If you can't go, I understand.

I'll just have
to take Jenna.

Oh, wait.

Can I at least...

think about it?

(doorbell rings)

We have to talk.

I know it's a bad excuse,

but if the Elwood City
Otters beat Crown City,

we'll go to
the playoffs.

I have to take
those tickets.

That's okay.

I mean, it's not like
either of us

are really into dancing anyway.

Right.

Even though
we are pretty good at it.

We're the best
in the class.

Maybe even the best
in Elwood City.

Who knows? We might have

even won
that trophy.

You know what?

We are going
to win that trophy.

You mean it?

Well, we're going to try,
at least.

Forget the tickets.

Let's start practicing.

I'll get my CD player.

(tango music playing)

And instead
of grounding me,

my parents made me come

to this dance
competition.

What rotten luck, right?

They're up next.

I still can't believe

Francine turned down
those tickets.

Well, I spent two whole weeks
pestering George.

Not only did he not drop out,

I didn't even get
a cookie out of him.

(cheering and applause)

And that was
Nigel Ratburn

and Paige Turner,
dancing the tango.

In the seven-to-ten age group,

we have George Lundgren
and Francine Frensky.

(cheering and applause)

MUFFY:
Ugh, that dress

doesn't even have
any sequins!

What a waste.

Hope you don't trip,
Antler Boy!

(jazz music playing)

Hey, they're pretty good.

Is that really Francine?

That was a beautiful
twirl!

Keep your head
up, George!

Poise! Poise!

Shh!

(both gasp)

(applause)

Bravo!
Whoo-hoo!

Bravo!
You guys rock!

Ahem! Of course,

we could have
done much better.

Oh, yeah.

Some jazz hands

would have really
helped their finish.

MR. HANEY:
And first place

for the seven-
to-ten age group

goes to...

MUFFY:
I can't watch!

Tell me
when it's over.

Karl and Chelsea,

for their sizzling
rumba!

(cheering and applause)

It was that stumble
I had.

I'm sorry, George.

No, it's my fault.

I didn't set
you up right.

But look on the
bright side--

we made some
new fans.

That is so unfair!

Recount!

Recount!

No, their performance was
outstanding, really.

I haven't seen anything
like that in years.

Second place isn't so bad.

It's the first time
I've ever won anything!

Well, see you
at school.

MUFFY:
Francine!

I just wanted
to say,

I think you
were robbed.

Yeah, I know.

But we did have
a lot of fun.

Personally, I blame it all
on your dress.

But we'll fix that

in the "Introduction to Fashion"
class I signed us up for.

The what?!

Ta-ta!

Muffy!

♪ Every day when you're
walking down the street ♪

♪ And everybody that you meet ♪

♪ Has an original
point of view ♪

♪ And I say, hey ♪
♪ Hey! ♪

♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

♪ If we could learn
to work and play ♪

♪ And get along
with each other ♪

♪ Hey! ♪
♪ What a wonderful kind
of day ♪

♪ Hey! ♪
♪ What a wonderful
kind of day ♪

♪ Hey! ♪