-Are ya ready, kids?
-[kids] Aye, aye, Captain!
-I can't hear you!
-[shouting] Aye, aye, Captain!
♪ Oh... ♪
♪ Who lives in a pineapple
Under the sea? ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ Absorbent and yellow
And porous is he ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ If nautical nonsense
Be something you wish ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ Then drop on the deck
And flop like a fish ♪
-♪ SpongeBob SquarePants
-Ready?
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants
SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪
[Captain laughs]
[plays airy tune]
[sniffs] Ah.
Nothing quite like a relaxing
stroll deep in Jellyfish fields.
[shrieking]
I'd know that sound anywhere!
It's a terrifying shriek!
But where's it coming from?
[shrieks]
Patrick,
what is with all the shrieking?
You know I walk here
on Tuesdays.
Sorry, SpongeBob.
That wasn't me.
Patrick, I know I heard
a terrifying shriek.
So did I, SpongeBob,
but I was just mimicking it.
So you were mimicking it?
Patrick, please don't do that.
-It is really...
-[shrieking]
Wait a minute, if the shriek
wasn't coming from you,
where was it...?
It's over there.
Behind that kelp shrub.
[shrieking]
The terrifying shriek
must've come from this clam.
[sputtering]
Hey, Patrick. I think
there's something wrong with...
[coughs]
[wheezes]
What are we gonna do?
Well, the last time
I remember coughing like that,
I was sitting at home
eating a box of kelp jerky.
You were coughing because you
got some stuck in your throat?
I got the TV remote
stuck in my throat.
Patrick, this clam is choking!
Luckily I come prepared.
There, there, Clammy.
What are you doing?
-They like this.
-No.
You always give a choking victim
the "slime-lick" maneuver first.
And if that doesn't work,
you walk away
and pretend like
you never saw them before.
Like this. Ready, clam?
[straining] Ooh!
Well, SpongeBob, I think
I might go catch a movie.
-Hey, what about the clam?
-What clam?
I've never seen that clam
before.
But...
[gasps]
Patrick, the clam had a baby.
That's not a baby, SpongeBob.
-Then what could it be?
-I'll give you a hint.
What's white and round
and comes out of clams?
Their... eyes?
-No, silly. A volleyball!
-A baby volleyball!
I got it! Oof!
-Good idea coming here, Patrick.
-That's my specialty.
-Having good ideas?
-Nope. Being called Patrick.
Maybe we should do
some stretches first.
-Good idea!
-Well, that's my specialty.
Having good ideas?
Nope.
Doing some stretches first.
Yeah. No. I dunno.
The thing's years old.
How should I know? All right.
Look, if you don't wanna...
Uh-huh. Yeah. Well, I...
Yeah, yeah. I'm still here.
, .
-Gentlemen.
-Hello.
I couldn't help noticing
what a lovely ball that is.
Oh. Really?
Yes, I'd sure like
to get a closer look.
-We don't mind, do we, Patrick?
-Just don't take too long.
We were just about to
start playing with it.
Oh, it won't take long at all.
Ooh!
It's heavier than I imagined.
And shiner, too.
Where'd you find it?
We found it
deep in Jellyfish Fields.
Really? What was it doing there?
-Choking a clam.
-Well... [clears throat]
What would you say if I were to
offer you a small fortune
in exchange for your shiny ball?
What do you mean, small fortune?
Whoa. How many more trucks do
you think there'll be, Patrick?
Huh? Oh, I dunno. I am
getting kinda hungry, though.
I'll catch up with you later,
SpongeBob.
That looked like
the last of 'em.
-The last of what?
-Oh, hey, Patrick.
So, did you figure out
what you're gonna do
with this fat stack
of cabbage yet?
Yep! I mean... nope.
Well, my dad always told me,
"When you have money,
you need to do more
than spend it.
You need to have a plan."
Wow, your dad really
told you that?
What he said was,
"How many times do I have to
tell you not to stand there?"
-But I knew what he meant.
-Hey, Patrick.
I know where to go
when you don't know what to buy.
-You do?
-The mall!
-Yeah!
-Whoo!
[both] Touchdown!
[both] Awwww!
Patrick? Where'd you go?
-Oh. There you are.
-[both laugh]
Patrick, that was
the best shopping day ever.
-You can say that again.
-Best shopping day ever.
-Patrick, I've got an idea.
-Really?
Let's go shopping again
and this time... buy stuff!
Oh! Wasn't that incredible,
Patrick?
With all this money,
we could've bought anything
in the whole world.
-Yep.
-So, tell me, what'd you buy?
A life-time supply
of strawberry gum.
Hey, me too!
And to think, we barely even
put a dent in my fortune.
Two, please. One for me and one
for my best friend, Patrick.
I didn't really ask
who they're for.
Thanks. There you go.
It was only cents
for the ice cream.
Oh, that's OK.
I kinda have more money
than I know what to do with
right now.
Looks like my ex-wife was wrong.
I am in the right line of work.
Triple goo berry sundae, please.
-Extra nuts.
-Sure. That's gonna be . .
Ugh. Hey, Bert, you got, like,
eight cents I can borrow?
Let me check.
No, I don't, Bill. Sorry.
You know,
why is it I always have money
when you need to borrow it?
I dunno what to say.
Are you gentlemen low on funds?
Let me help. Here you go.
Whoa. That's OK.
I just need eight cents.
That's OK. I already
got my ice cream. See?
-OK, uh... Thanks!
-Sure thing.
-Do you need some too, Bert?
-OK!
-Could I have some too?
-You wanna buy some ice cream?
No, I'm allergic.
But... I'll be your best friend.
It's a deal.
I think I could hang out
with this guy for a while.
-Me too.
-Me too.
Me three.
Ice cream?
Mmm. Yes?
Uh... I'm here to see SpongeBob.
And are you on the guest list,
sir?
Well, I don't think so.
Normally, I...
Then I'm afraid I can't
let you in, sir. Good day, sir.
Good day.
Your shoe's untied.
Oh. Why so it is.
[sniffs]
Thank you, sir.
And so he was like, "Do you
wanna buy some ice cream?"
Ice cream! Can you imagine?
[chuckles] I love that story.
Hey, guys.
Have you seen SpongeBob around?
Is that guy talking to us?
Just don't move or breathe.
He might go away.
SpongeBob? SpongeBob!
Hey, pal, watch it.
I could buy and sell you.
And I said, "Go ahead.
Let's do it right now.
I got too much hair anyways."
[laughter]
SpongeBob. SpongeBob!
That's my name.
Don't wear it out.
[laughter]
SpongeBob,
I gotta tell ya something
I think you should know.
Your house is full of strangers!
Oh, Patrick.
These aren't strangers.
These are
of my closest friends.
-Right, everybody?
-[all] Yeah!
-That's right!
-[all] Yeah!
[all cheering]
Patrick, do you hear that?
That is the sound of love.
SpongeBob, if you keep throwing
your money away like that,
you won't have any left.
-And then--
-Excuse me, sir.
Is this man giving you trouble?
-SpongeBob!
-Like I was saying...
-But...
-We don't want any trouble.
Now just keep moving.
Dude, how did you get in there?
And I told him, it's not
that I mind the macaroni.
-What I mind is...
-Sorry about that, SpongeBob.
-Won't happen again.
-No matter.
He's simply jealous of
my glamorous new lifestyle.
Say, that reminds me.
Can I have some money?
Why, certainly.
I always remember to...
[all gasp]
I forgot.
I keep it in this other pocket.
[all gasp]
Uh, will you please excuse me
for a moment?
[gasps]
[gasps]
[groans]
[screams and sobs]
Well, everyone.
I hope this doesn't
put a damper on things,
but I just checked and...
Well, it's just that
all my money is... gone.
Don't be late
for work tomorrow, boy.
-Hey, Patrick.
-Oh. Hey, SpongeBob.
Whatcha doing?
Oh, the same thing us sea stars
are usually doing, I guess.
Laying up against a rock.
-Patrick, I was wrong.
-About what?
The money and about
those people being my friends.
There is no right or wrong
when it comes to that stuff,
SpongeBob.
There just either is
or there isn't.
Patrick,
if having a bunch of money
makes me forget that
you're my best friend,
then I don't want any more money
ever again.
Well, why didn't you say so,
buddy?
I've been waiting for
someone to go break in
my new volleyball with!
You got another new volleyball?
Yep. I found it.
Found it? Where?
Inside the Bikini Bottom
Diamond Mine!
[inhales]
♪ Fi-garo ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
♪ Fi-ga-ro ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
♪ Figaro-Figaro-Figaro
Figaro-Figaro ♪
♪ Fi-ga-rooooh ♪
[coughs]
[groans]
Don't feel bad. He didn't
use me yesterday either.
♪ La-la-la-la-la ♪
I am anxious to look good and
make a strong first impression
as I share my singing skills
with the famed
Bikini Bottom Men's Chorus.
♪ La-la-la-laaaa ♪
But I needn't be too anxious,
for once they hear
this master's voice,
they'll give me the lead solo
for sure.
♪ Figaro ♪
Huh?
Well, it looks like
a forlorn SpongeBob
lying sprawled across the dirt.
[inhales]
[sighs]
Obviously depressed.
Oh, what a lovely day. For me.
[chuckles]
Huh?
Squidward, my playmate Patrick
is away at a family reunion.
Sad and alone.
I'm desperate for something to
do and someone to play with.
[coughs]
Well, I've got no time
for the likes of you.
Squidward, where are you going
all dressed up?
None of your business.
-Can I come?
-And no, you can't.
Are you going to a fancy store?
-No.
-A fancy par-tay?
-No.
-A hot fancy-pants date?
-No.
-Can I come? Can I come?
Can I come?
Can I come? Can I come?
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.
Does that answer your questions?
All except for that last one.
No, you can't!
[breathing heavily]
If you must know, I am going to
be a featured soloist
for an impending
concert performance
with the famed
Bikini Bottom Men's Choir.
I'm hitting the big time,
not playtime.
Now if you'll excuse me...
Wow!
I may not be as good as you
and your buddies, Squidward,
but I too have a song
in my heart that I wanna share.
[clearing throat]
[forcing throat]
[coughs and wheezes]
♪ La ♪
[coughs and wheezes]
Au revoir, SpongeBob!
See you in the nosebleed seats.
Har-har-har-har!
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
-♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
-♪ La-la-la-la-la-la-la ♪
-Huh?
-♪ Yodelay-hee-hoo ♪
I'm good enough to join
the Bikini Bottom Men's Chorus.
-I promise!
-Yuck!
Perhaps Squidward didn't see me.
♪ Figaro ♪
[clears throat]
♪ Figaro ♪
This giant pothole
ought to get his attention.
♪ Fi-gar-oooooooh ♪
Ugh! I think I hit
the wrong note back there.
What the...?
What a lucky break!
Now I have a c*ptive audience.
-[clears throat]
-[screams]
♪ Laaaa ♪
[screams]
♪ Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi-mi
Mi-mi-miiii ♪
[clears throat]
[wails]
Squidward,
could you keep it down, please?
I'm trying to find my
starting pitch here.
-[screams]
-♪ Ah ♪
If that rank amateur SpongeBob
embarrasses me
in front of the Bikini Bottom
Choir men, my life is ruined!
[gasps] I'm almost late
for choir practice.
I'd better not run into
SpongeBob again or I'm doomed!
[chuckles]
♪ Figaro, Figaro, Figaro
Figaro ♪
Stop! Stop. Stop. Stop.
[screams]
I hereby issue you this ticket
for reckless frowning
and failing to
listen to my song.
What are you, some kinda...?
That's right.
I'm a singing traffic cop.
A singing traffic--
♪ O, sole mioooo ♪
SpongeBob,
I will be late to practice
with all of your tomfoolery
slowing me down.
It is a high honor to be chosen
for the Bikini Bottom
Men's Chorus.
And you are not going to keep me
from performing my grand solo.
[inhales]
♪ Figaro, Figaro, Figaro
Figaro ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
♪ Fi-ga-roooo... ♪
[voice echoing]
♪ Ohhhh... ♪
Just in time.
Gentlemen.
[all vocalizing scales]
[clears throat]
[continues clearing throat]
[sputtering and grumbling]
[inhales]
[all vocalizing scales]
[off-pitch] ♪ Laaaaaaaaaaaaaah ♪
[piano stops]
[in tune] ♪ Laaaaaaaaaaaaaah ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
-♪ Fi-ga-rooooh ♪
-It's so beautiful!
♪ Ohhhh ♪
♪ Ahhhh... ♪
[sniffles] That's
the most wonderful singing
I've ever heard.
[sobs]
♪ Ahhhh ♪
[all cheering]
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Oh!
[cheering and applause]
-Hear, hear.
-Bravo.
Oh, Master SquarePants.
We would be honored if you
would take the open chair
as our featured soloist!
[chuckles] Well...
Mmm. Hmm. Ah. Mmm.
We would also be honored
if you would wear this.
[gasps] A moustache? For me?
Well?
Well, don't be shy. Put it on.
Squidward, look.
My very own
choir man's moustache.
[groans]
Well, will you do it?
[groaning]
I'll do it!
But only if you find a spot
for my inspiration
and great friend, Squidward.
Deal!
♪ Figarooooh ♪
♪ Figaro ♪
-♪ Fi-ga-rooooh ♪
-[cheering and applause]
06x12 - Porous Pockets/Choir Boys
Watch/Buy Amazon Merchandise
A square yellow sponge named SpongeBob SquarePants lives in a pineapple with his pet snail, Gary, in the city of Bikini Bottom on the floor of the Pacific Ocean.
A square yellow sponge named SpongeBob SquarePants lives in a pineapple with his pet snail, Gary, in the city of Bikini Bottom on the floor of the Pacific Ocean.