01x07 - Saturday

Episode transcripts for the TV show "7th Heaven". Aired: August 26, 1996 – May 13, 2007.*
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Eric Camden is a reverend, husband and the father of numerous children who faces everyday challenges of raising a family during permissive times.
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01x07 - Saturday

Post by bunniefuu »

-Hi. -Hi.

Believe it or not, most parents don't do that in front of their children.

Your point being?

Ashley's coming over to go to Mary's game with us.

So?

Mom...

Ashley is very popular.

Oh, but she doesn't like kissing?

Sounds like a good role model for you, luce.

How come you guys get to do that and we have to clean the bathroom?

This is my reward for cutting the grass.

So what do we get?

You get to live here for free.

Simon, what are you doing?

I'm loading up for the game.

You don't want us to starve to death, do you?

Grab the ding-dongs.

I want to go to the confession stand.

It's not confession, it's concession.

It's too expensive anyway.

I have money from the tooth fairy.

Oh, well then, will you buy me snacks too?

Sorry, you have to lose your own teeth.

I washed your car for you, mom.

I'll meet you guys at the game as soon as I get done with work.

Okay, thanks.

Did he say work?

I wasn't gonna say anything until I actually got through a couple of weeks, but, what the heck? This is a cakewalk.

I've heard that before.

No, seriously, I can't miss with this job.

I'm tutoring a girl in my English lit class.

How did I know there was a girl involved?

Dad, it's not what you think.

I'm not attracted to this girl.

-Right. -Why not?

There's no reason why. I'm just not.

I don't believe you.

Look, I'm not attracted to every woman I see.

-Yes you are. -Knock it off.

Look, even if I were attracted to her, I can separate business from pleasure.

Oh, yeah...How long do you think that'll last?

It'll last, I need the job.

Good luck.

Thanks.

I'll probably make it to the game by halftime.

Hey! Go wildcats!

Defense! Defense! Defense! Defense!

Defense! Defense! Defense!

Ok, here's the thing.

Would you mind not coming to my game?

-Who? -Who? -Who?

All of you.

Why do you hate me?

I don't hate you.

You're just not going to the game.

But why?

Because you make me nervous, that's why.

I've never made you nervous before.

Yes, you did, I just never said anything.

It's just too hard for me to stay focused out there.

I've got dad and Matt yelling instructions at me, mom screaming at the ref, and Simon and ruthie are so loud I can hear everything they say.

Oh, sure. The one time I invite Ashley over, you decide to spill your guts.

You and Ashley don't even like basketball.

Who cares about basketball?

Do you know how many boys go to those games?

That's exactly my point.

You go back and forth to the concession stand every two minutes, and it's distracting.

Do you know how many boys are at the concession stand?

Uh! That's it! Get out.

Come on.

Sports aren't just about sports.

This is our biggest game of the season, and you want me to worry about your social life?

I want to get on Ashley's good side, and this'll do it.

You don't get it, do you?

I'm a freshman on the varsity team, so some of the older girls resent me.

I have to earn my spot every game if I ever want to feel like I'm really part of the team.

Don't you get it?

I'm trying to belong, too.

But do I get any help from you?

No.

It's just not fair.

Yeah!

I was the loudest person at the game last week.

Yeah!

Nobody yells better than me.

Yeah!

You know, if it wasn't for me, the team probably would never even have made it to the finals.

Yeah!

Would you quit saying yeah?

Ok!

So, what are we going to do if we're not going to the game?

We aren't going to do anything.

I'm going to play detective by myself.

I want to play!

I--i could be the bad guy.

You make a terrible, terrible bad guy.

Why?

Because you smile too much.

And you're too easy to catch.

I won't smile.

Nope.

I--i could be your side track?

No, that, that's sidekick.

Ok.

But-- you have to do everything that I say.

Deal?

Deal.

Oh, I'll bet you can't wait till have enough hair to use a blade in that.

How come you're in such a good mood?

Your mother and I are going to the grocery store together.

How'd you pull that off?

I thought she hates shopping with you.

She was so mad about Mary not letting her go to the game.

I don't know, she got distracted and said yes.

The secret to everything, timing.

Oh, wait, that reminds me.

I'd better go or I'll be late.

Can I get in there?

Hey, don't forget to take your sh*t from the top of the key.

Yeah, and talk to Corey and tell her to throw the ball...

Yeah, talk to her, and remember to relax...

Yeah, you always do better when you relax.

Thanks. Now can I please get in here?

Too much?

Mom, you have to do something.

About what?

Mary! Talk her into letting me go to the game.

Oh, honey, I can't even talk her into letting me go to the game.

What am I going to tell Ashley?

She'll be here any minute.

Well, just tell her that the two of you are going to keep an eye on ruthie and Simon while your father and I go to the grocery store.

Mom!

What?

Ashley will never go along with that.

You know, what is so great about Ashley?

What is so great about Ashley?

She has more clothes than anybody and everybody loves her.

Well, I don't.

Everybody that counts.

It'll only be for an hour.

Wait a minute.

You never let anyone go grocery shopping with you.

Why now? Why today?

When I'm on the verge of belonging to the coolest group in school?

Because i'm desperately trying to make you unpopular so that you and I can have more moments alone together like this one.

-Thanks a lot. -You're welcome.

Oh, you must be Matt.

That's right.

Well, I'm Susan's dad.

Give me 5, dude.

So, my Susan tells me you're a b.M.O.C.

Uh, b.M.O.C.?

Big man on campus?

Where you been, kid?

You know, I haven't seen Susan this excited in a long time.

I'll bet she's changed her outfit 6 times already.

But I'm just the tutor.

Of course you are.

Hi, Matt.

Susan.

Told ya.

I'm on my way.

What?

I'm on my way.

That's what d*ck Tracy says.

Why?

I don't know why, he just says it.

Would you talk into the watch?

What?

Talk into your watch.

Ok.

I'm on my way.

Where are you going?

No. Would you just say that you're right behind me?

I'm right behind you.

You don't look like you're going anywhere to me.

You're not wearing that to the game, are you?

Um, actually, no.

I've got some good news and bad news.

I'm Ashley. I don't get bad news.

Ok...

How would you feel about not going to the game?

See ya.

Oh, Ashley, wait! Please.

My parents will be gone, so we can call boys.

What boys?

Didn't you want to know if Jimmy's friend Steve liked you?

Yeah...

I can call Jimmy right now.

You two mind Lucy while we're gone.

We will, dad.

And watch out for the bad guys.

So, who's gonna be the bad guy?

I don't know yet.

Hey, how about happy?

No, happy's too happy to be a bad guy.

Here you go, guys.

Have a nice Saturday.

Bingo.

Bingo? I love bingo.

No, I mean bingo.

That's our bad guy.

No, he's our mailman, silly.

Yeah, our mailman who robbed the biggest bank in America.

He's a mailman by day, but he's public enemy number one by night.

Work with me, ruthie, work with me.

Hope you like prison food, pal.

Beep beep, beep beep.

Why'd you do that?

Would you behave?

Sorry.

So, do you want to take this list and start on the other side of the store?

No, I want to be with you.

Ok.

What's wrong?

Nothing.

You still upset about Mary's game?

No, why should I be upset?

Just asking.

What do you see?

He's doing something.

What?

He's doing it again.

Tell me! What? What?

He put the mail in a box.

That's our man.

He made the drop.

What's a drop?

The loot, the goods, the stuff... You know.

The stash?

Yeah, that's great, ruthie.

I heard it on Scooby doo.

So what if I've driven her to 650 practices, huh?

So what if I've been a constant source of support to Mary since she was 7 years old.

So what if I've cleaned her uniform, washed her shoes, reminded her when to take her vitamins.

That's no reason I should be included in her life.

After all, I am only her mother.

Grown from denial to anger, and we're not even done shopping.

You're progressing beautifully.

We've hit the mother lode.

Can you try to act your age?

Hey, pinwheels.

You told me they stopped making these.

Hey, isn't that the kid that you got into drug rehab last month?

Yeah, that's Terry Daniels.

Wonder why he's out so soon.

I don't know.

I don't think he could've cleaned up his life in 30 days.

I really thought he was gonna be ok.

I'll see you at home.

Want to open your backpack?

What's up?

Wanna open up the bag, son?

Yeah.

Sure.

Hi, reverend.

Hey, Sam.

Oh, man, these impulse items at the end of the aisle are something, aren't they?

I almost got one of these myself.

I walked all around the store with it before I remembered to put it back.

Did you forget to put this back?

Yeah. Yeah, that's what happened.

The kid forgot.

Anything you say, reverend.

-Thanks. -Sure, could've happened to anybody.

Yeah.

How's your bank sh*t?

What?

Your pool game? You wanna play a few racks?

I mean, unless you're busy.

Uh, I gotta, I'm gonna meet somebody.

Oh, when are you meeting him?

Around, uh-- oh, come on. You got time.

So, is Matt coming to the game?

Nope, neither is anyone else in my family.

Why?

I told them they couldn't come.

Well, how could you do that?

I don't know. My family just stresses me out too much.

Mary, families live for these games, especially your family.

Yeah, I know, but, I don't know.

They just drive me crazy.

You know, it's bad luck not to invite your family.

You're going to ruin this for the whole team.

Bad luck? Really?

Yeah, everybody knows that.

Mary, come on.

I'll be right there.

Come on, luce, get off the phone.

You are so lucky Jimmy moon likes you and Steve is his best friend.

I know.

Otherwise, I'd be out of here.

I know.

Hello?

Hi, Jimmy.

What are you doing?

Nothing. What are you doing?

Oh, nothing.

Want me to ask him?

No!

Hello?

Ask him!

Jimmy, is it true that your friend Stevie likes my friend Ashley?

Ashley...ashley who?

The Ashley?

Oh, her?

Well, he thought she was a babe until he talked to her.

Well, he didn't actually talk to her, he just listened.

Because she was so interesting.

No, 'cause she never shut up.

He hates her now.

Well, you could tell him I hate him, too!

What?

You're a moron!

Wait, Ashley!

What did I do?

Come on, Ashley, don't go.

Your boyfriend's a jerk, and so are you.

Ashley!

Simon? Ruthie?

Simon, ruthie, this isn't funny!

Hi, it's me.

How's it going?

It's not going that well.

How's everything there?

Well, nobody's home.

Do you think they snuck over to the game?

She doesn't want anybody there.

You don't have to remind me, thank you very much.

Sorry.

Listen, I'm probably going to be a while.

Ok.

Well, good luck with Terry, ok?

Thanks.

Just like old times, huh, rev?

Yeah.

Only difference is, you're clean now.

Right.

So how's it been going?

Great. Everything's great.

Sure is remarkable how fast you got out of rehab.

Yeah.

I mean, only 30 days?

Some patients are still sneaking out to smoke a joint the first month of rehab.

I guess they don't have the self discipline you have, huh?

Yeah, I guess.

Hey, Terry.

We're set, man.

Later.

Now, let me guess.

Harvard business school?

Nah, he's just some goof who hangs out here.

Forget about him.

You walked out of rehab, huh?

It--it wasn't like that.

Well, the truth.

You're still using, aren't you?

No.

Terry.

Come on, give me a break, I'm clean.

I thought we had an agreement.

I'd get you out of juvenile hall, you'd complete a rehab program.

I didn't need to finish the program.

I'm fine.

No kidding?

What do you say we call the rehab center and get their opinion?

You calling me a liar?

No, I'm just saying you're not telling me the truth.

Yeah, well, you don't know what you're talking about.

I know exactly what I'm talking about.

I don't need this.

I'm out of here.

What you need is to get back into rehab.

Just butt out of my life.

Terry!

Terry!

He's walking again.

Roger that.

Where's he going?

He's leaving... Oops, he's leaving.

Just let him try.

Nobody gets away from Simon Camden, p.I.

He got away.

Not for long.

We'll head back to base and we'll regroup.

What's base?

Home.

Don't you know anything?

Which way's home?

Uh, home?

Well, uh, home is, uh...

Home is, um...

Home is, home is this way.

No, wait.

Home?

Home is back this way.

Wh-- you don't know, do you?

Look, I'll find it.

There's really nothing to worry about.

Are you sure?

Absolutely.

We're lost, aren't we?

I want mommy.

Hi, Martha.

I hope you don't mind my dropping by like this.

Is it Terry? He's not hurt or anything?

No, no, he's not hurt.

It's just the usual, I'm afraid.

Oh, please, come in.

A sh*t from the top of the key!

Robins gets the rebound, he sh**t inside, it's good!

Hey, Tom.

Reverend Camden.

Sit down.

We thought about calling you when Terry ran out of rehab.

But after all the help you gave us getting him in there, we didn't really figure it was fair to call on you again.

Well, it's just gonna take a lot more time and effort than we hoped it would.

He called yesterday.

And I got frustrated and hung up on him.

It's so hard.

Worse than when we sent him for treatment in the first place.

We just put him out on the street.

I can't believe it.

17...he's got no better life than a stray dog.

You did what you had to do.

And let's not forget Terry had a choice here.

We tried, reverend, we really tried.

I know you did.

I'm just tired.

He's completely worn me down.

You know what happens to these kids?

The dr*gs become their family.

He doesn't care about us.

All he cares about is getting high.

I can't understand it.

Maybe if we had just realized what he was doing sooner, maybe if we had gotten through to him when he was younger.

You know, I never really talked to him.

By the time he was in trouble, I didn't even know who he was.

You know, it's not as if any of us went through this as kids.

Most of us don't even have a frame of reference for problems like these until they happen to somebody we know.

Maybe we should just tell him to come home.

His counselor said not to do that, honey.

I guess this is the part of the program they call tough love.

It k*lled us to do it.

They said it could work.

Hey, really, both of you.

You've done everything humanly possible to help him.

You know, the past few days I've done nothing but pray.

Well, that's not nothing.

Shakespeare's so confusing.

Like this part here.

What is Romeo saying?

Well, it's simple.

He's saying he'd give up anything just to be close to her.

Read it to me.

I'll understand it better.

You know, maybe you should-- oh, no, please. You read it.

Please?

"She speaks, yet she says nothing.

"What of that?

"See how she leans her cheek upon her hand?

"Oh, that I were the glove upon that hand that I might touch that cheek."

Touch it.

Touch it! Touch it!

Oh, no, no, no, no-- yes! Yes! Yes!

Well, here you go--

I'd like to have a word with you, young man.

I think it's time for a little rap session.

Look, Mr. Barrett, I know this looks bad, but-- there's no need to explain.

I know that Susan's an attractive girl.

After all, she looks just like her mother.

Mr. Barrett, I'm not saying Susan's not attractive, she is attractive, very attractive, and I'm sure your wife is attractive, it's just, you know, when I took this job, this isn't what I had in mind.

Whoa, chill out, dude.

Look, I know what this is about.

Hormones.

I know about those little devils.

How they can get in the way of any man's work.

Um, look, that's not exactly where I was going with this.

Look, if you two kids promise to, uh, behave yourselves, well, maybe you can keep on tutoring her.

You know, I think we're trying to work out two different things here.

So I quit.

Nobody quits me, boy.

You're fired.

Have it your way.

Simon? Ruthie? Happy?

Come on, you guys. Where are you?

Simon?

Happy? Ruthie?

Spartans and the wildcats set for the tipoff.

Corey.

You know the girl who's guarding me has no defense, so if you look for me at the top of the key, I'll be open for sure.

I mean, you're the point guard, so it's your call, but I know I can score.

You're right, I'm the point guard.

So I'll make the call.

Ruthie, I promise I'll get us home.

-How? -I'll figure something out.

Hey!

Hey! Stop!

Stop!

I told you i'd figure something out.

I don't want to go to jail.

Nobody's going to jail.

Simon, ruthie, is that you?

Yeah?

He's from our church.

You two are a long way from home.

That's 'cause we're lost.

Come on.

Here comes Corey Conway leading the charge.

Hi, Mary!

Go!

Hey, I'm open!

Oh! Point sh*t just misses.

Spartans with the rebound.

Mom? Dad? Matt?

Anybody?

Nobody's home.

They probably went to my sister's game.

They weren't supposed to.

They went, you know they went.

They probably left behind some evidence.

Want me to help you look for clues?

Why don't we just take a ride, and go check out the gym?

-Yeah! -Yeah!

Bye, happy.

Tell you how it all turns out.

Party's over, put it out.

Yeah.

You following me?

I thought you said you were clean?

It's just pot.

Just pot.

It was just pot that got you kicked out of school.

Yeah, so what?

And it was just pot that got you kicked out of rehab.

That's not true.

It was just pot that made your parents blow their life savings trying to get you straight!

How do you know that?

I went to see them.

I told you to stay out of my business.

This is my business.

Just go back to rehab and finish the program.

I'll take you there, I'll walk in with you, I'll do whatever I can to help you.

-Forget it. -Why?

They're a bunch of losers. I'm not going back.

Who's the loser? You're living on the street.

And let me tell you, you can't survive out there long.

-I'll survive. -No, you won't.

You'll get hurt or k*lled, I've seen it a thousand times.

So? I mean, you don't care.

My parents don't care.

They won't even let me come home.

Terry, the only one who doesn't care about you is you.

Let me help.

I'll take care of myself.

For how long?

Debbie Elliott takes it in herself.

Come on, come on, mar!

Go, go, come on girls!

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hi!

I thought I'd find you here.

Where are the kids?

I'm sure they're hiding around here somewhere.

How's Mary doing?

She'd be doing better if Corey would pass her the ball.

Yeah, what else is new?

Go, go!

Go, Mary!

So, how'd the tutoring go?

You don't want to know.

Not again.

Can we talk about it later?

The freshman Mary Camden fires.

Spartans down only by 6.

Hey, can we turn on the siren just for the heck of it?

I don't think so.


Daddy!

Hey, reverend, brought you a present.

Hiya, sweetie.

Dad, we got to ride in the squad car.

It was so cool.

Yes, I can see that.

The question is why were you riding in a squad car?

We got lost.

Sergeant Michaels took us home first, but nobody was there, so we figured mom came to the game.

Thanks.

Anytime.

Hope Mary's team wins.

Watch yourself.

Bye, Simon, bye, ruthie.

Thanks again, sarge.

See you, sergeant Michaels.

So, uh, exactly how did you guys get lost?

We followed the mailman. He was a bank robber.

We were playing detective.

Can we at least see the game before we get sent to our rooms for the rest of our lives?

Well, I guess we could do that.

I mean, we're already here.

-All right! -Come on.

Chrissy Nelson will be sh**ting a one-on-one bonus for the spartans.

I can't believe it.

I told you, it's good luck.

Chrissy Nelson free throw, bounces off the rim.

Camden snags the rebound.

Here come the wildcats!

Come on, Mary!

Go! Go! Go! Go!

Corey, I'm open!

Come on!

Come on, she's wide open!

Pass it to her!

Give her the ball!

Mary Camden fires from inside the key.

Yes!

Camden steals the ball.

5 seconds left!

Camden puts it back up! Score!

Wildcats win!

Mary! Mary!

That's it. Life's over.

I'm dead.

Simon, ruthie, I've been looking all over the-- neighborhood for you. Where were you?

We went to Mary's game.

What?

Wait a minute.

You guys all went to the game without me?

Yep. They all went.

You always leave me out of everything.

This isn't fair.

Look, luce, we didn't plan it.

And where were you when Simon and ruthie took off trailing the mailman?

Yeah, technically, you got us in trouble.

You got yourself in trouble.

And me.

Never leave this house again unless you're with a grown-up.

Anything else?

Not for the moment.

What about me?

What's my punishment?

Next time you're asked to watch the kids, watch the kids.

-That's it? -That's it.

Ok, everybody upstairs right now.

What was that?

What was what?

We have a deal here.

I'm good cop, you're bad cop.

If we're gonna switch roles, I need some advance warning.

Sorry.

Well, you're gonna have to go upstairs and punish them.

You can't just let them off the hook like this.

You're right.

What happened with you and Terry?

I just got a big, fat dose of perspective, that's what happened.

Our kids' problems don't seem like problems at all.

It's still important that we stick to the rules, otherwise the little problems could turn into bigger problems.

Ok, ok. Bad cop's on his way.

What happened to you?

I stopped to fill up the car.

I didn't want to leave it on empty.

Ok, so I got fired again.

What happened?

I'm gonna give it to you straight.

She grabbed me, she kissed me, then her father walked in, that's pretty much it.

Go ahead. Punish him.

Good cop's a lot easier than bad cop.

What do you think your punishment should be?

I don't know.

Ok, how's this?

Your punishment is you're not allowed to take another job for at least a month.

Who are you and what have you done to my dad?

One more thing.

Tell me you'll never do dr*gs.

Oh, he's back.

No, I mean, you won't even experiment with them.

Just promise.

Look, I've promised that to you over and over.

How about once more?

Ok, I promise, you don't have to worry.

I have no interest in doing dr*gs.

Why is that?

Well, it probably has something to do with the fact that my father's a minister who counsels drug addicts and tells me their horror stories.

Guess I've got a smart son.

Yeah, a smart son who can't hold a job.

Oh.

Tough day, dad?

Oh, the worst.

I can't figure out why some kids do dr*gs and others don't.

There doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to it.

Well, according to you, a lot of kids do dr*gs just so they can belong to a group.

You know, they feel like they have to fit in.

And you?

I guess I'm lucky I'm a loner.

What about the rest of the family?

Mary's a team player, she has basketball to fit in, and Simon already knows who he is, and ruthie's 5.

You forgot Lucy.

No, I didn't.

She's the one you should worry about.

Why?

Because she always feels left out.

Yep.

You know, you're right.

You should talk to her.

I'm on my way.

Thanks.

Sure.

Look, if I knew the whole family was going to show up, I definitely would have told you to come, too.

Yeah, right.

Hey, just before the game, I even changed my mind about everybody coming.

But when I called home, the phone was busy.

Sorry, that was me.

No kidding.

Hi, dad.

Is dinner ready?

Wait a minute.

Everybody ate at the game, right?

I should have known.

Well, how about if I take you out to dinner?

Oh, good, so you can yell at me in private.

I'm not gonna yell at you.

I was totally irresponsible, so I'd like to offer to baby-sit every weekend for the next month.

Friday, Saturday, and sunday.

How's that?

Sounds a little extreme.

Really?

If you're offering, I'll take it.

Come on, let's go eat.

The two of us?

You bet.

Give me a second to change.

Hi, mom, want some help?

Oh, sure, but I can't pay you.

That's ok. Paying jobs don't seem to work for me.

Did dad ever tell you that he had 5 jobs his senior year at seminary?

All at once?

No, one after the other.

He got fired from 5 jobs?

Well, actually only 4.

He finally found one he could hang onto.

Doing what?

Working for my dad.

You know, how come parents never tell you about the bad stuff they've done?

Well, they like to wait till you're old enough not to throw it back at them during an argument.

So, uh, so you think I'm old enough?

I don't know.

That's why i'm testing you out on dad's stories first.

I wonder why we didn't get punished?

You're so young.

Mom will make sure dad punishes us.

I just goofed up, that's all.

Daddy doesn't goof up.

You're right.

Listen, you guys.

I got to talk to you.

Wandering the streets without a grown-up is very dangerous.

You're very lucky you found sergeant Michaels.

It wasn't luck, I flagged the guy down.

I knew we were in trouble.

Well, that was the right thing to do.

But we're still gonna get punished, aren't we?

Yep.

See?

What do you think your punishment should be?

Well, I think that we shouldn't be allowed out of our rooms all day tomorrow.

Not even for church.

Nice try.

I like church.

It makes me feel good.

You're making this difficult, kid.

Sorry.

Listen, if anybody ever comes to you and offers you dr*gs, any kind of dr*gs, I want you to come and tell me or your mother immediately. Ok?

Dad, you've already told us this 100 times.

So I'm telling you again.

Now promise me.

All right, I promise.

What about vitamins?

Give her a break, she's 5.

Even vitamins.

You can't start too young.

You forgot our punishment, daddy.

Unbelievable.

Oh, happy, hi.

Oh, nobody fed you today, come on, girl.

Come on, come with me.

Here, come here.

Oops.

We're out of dog food.

Um...

How about a little leftover tuna casserole, huh?

Poor girl, nobody fed you, you got left out of the game, nobody told you never to take dr*gs.

Listen to me, hap.

If someone walks up to you, offers you something to eat, and you don't know what it is, just say no, and walk away.

Ok?

This is ok.

It's tuna.

Happy?

Come on, it's ok.

No--this is ok.

Happy?

Happy, it's tuna.

Matt, Matt.

Yeah?

You're good at this.

What kind of punishment can I give ruthie and Simon for wandering off the way they did?

It's a tough one, ruthie's so cute.

Yeah, she reminds me so much of your mother.

And Simon's so funny, it's hard to be mad at funny.

You know, maybe you could ground them, not let them out of the house for a week.

Oh, I don't think so.

Not unless you two want to be locked up in here with them.

I see your point.

But you do want me to punish them, don't you?

Yes, I do.

I'm sorry, I just, I can't get back in the groove here.

Did Simon mention to you that he and ruthie were using your binoculars for their little adventure this afternoon?

No. Is that important?

Depends on how attached you are to them.

They didn't lose them, did they?

Well, Simon chose to put it this way, he temporarily misplaced them somewhere during the manhunt.

You know, why don't you go in there and make him feel guilty by telling him how important those binoculars were to you

'cause your uncle sid gave them to you when you were in the seminary so you could see the sorority--

oh, no, I'm sorry! So you could use them when you went, um, bird-watching.

I--i--i used to be quite the, um-- ornithologist?

Yeah, yeah.

I don't think we have to worry about finding those binoculars.

Nah, I don't do much bird-watching anymore anyway.

So, I guess it wasn't very fair to Jimmy, but at the same time, I had to make the call.

Otherwise Ashley would have never forgiven me and of course, never talk to me again.

So what I was thinking is if I could just get Jimmy to call Steve and have Steve call her, just to be nice and all, then she won't feel so bad about what Jimmy said.

'Cause it's not like Jimmy really knows her or anything.

I mean, him and Steve are best friends, but--

I'm sorry, hon, you were saying?

Are you looking for someone?

Just the waitress, I thought I'd get some coffee.

So, where were we?

Jimmy and Steve are best friends, but?

Wow, you really were listening.

Yeah. Those guys don't do dr*gs, do they?

You know, pot?

Jimmy? No way. Or Steve.

But you know, I'm really glad you brought that up because there was this one guy that Ashley liked and he was this really cool guy and a really good dresser and everything, but then she found out he got kicked out of his other school for using pot.

So she went up and asked him.

I told her to.

And he said, "so what?"

Hi.

Hi.

Late night television?

Nope. I made it for you.

Thanks.

Yeah, well, I owe you.

For what?

For not keeping your promise and coming to the game.

And for being the loudest person there.

Well, actually, we never did promise.

And I always thought Simon was louder than me.

No, mom.

Nobody is louder than you.

Will you come next week?

I wouldn't miss it.

So if Steve calls Ashley back, then Jimmy will call me back, then I'll call Ashley.

Hi, Mary.

Where was I?

You'll call Ashley.

Oh, yeah.

If Jimmy can just get him to do it because Steve's his best friend and you know Ashley.

Well, we've never met, yet I feel I know her.

Good night, dad.

Night, sweetie. Oh, and by the way, great game.

Never do dr*gs, sweet dreams.

Good night.

Thanks. I won't.

Dad and I are very concerned about teens and dr*gs.

Interesting.

Why don't you come upstairs and tell me what you guys talked about.

Ok.

Good night, dad.

Night, girls.

Hi.

How was dinner?

Well, let me put it this way, I learned more about Jimmy moon than I ever wanted to know.

Case in point.

He's ambidextrous.

That's fascinating.

Well, that's what I said.

Is there something else on your mind?

No, nothing.

You know, the kids are all in their rooms feeling guilty.

I don't think they'll be coming out, so perhaps we could go to bed early.

I don't think I could sleep.

Well, that's sort of the point.

Sorry.

Oh, that's ok.

No, answer the door, it's ok.

Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back.

I guess you were right.

I am a loser.

You knocked on my door.

You're not a loser.

I, uh, I need your help, reverend.

Come on in.

We'll start by calling your parents.
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