03x07 - Encounters

[bunniefuu]

Barbra jean, why do we have to
take a communication workshop?

We communicate just fine.

Like, remember the other day when I came
home and I asked you, "how was your day?"

And then you talked for 45
minutes. That's communication.

Please don't make me do this.

I don't know what you're tryin' to tell
me, but I bet I will after our workshop.

You know, I don't know
how we got sucked into this.

- I mean, we don't have
any problems.
- Ha!

- What's that mean?
- Oh, you'll find out.

You don't have to have problems
to learn how to communicate better.

Dr. Todd teaches you
to resolve conflict.

If the cowboys
would've had dr. Todd,

I bet they would have gotten
along better with the indians,

And we would still
refer to corn as maize.

[Mouthing words]

Is this about me not takin'
those salsa dancing lessons?

Because I will. I'll even
wear the tight pants.

okay, I know what
the problem is.

Okay, cheyenne? Seriously,
what's the problem?

That dr. Todd guy called
and said he can't make it.

[Van, brock
cheering] [muttering]

Just kiddin'. [Laughing]

Oh, man.

Oh, reba. Thank you so much
for lettin' us do this here.

Thank you very much for lettin'
me videotape it and selling it online.

Oh!

Hey, reba, what's in the box? Oh,
wait. Don't tell me. Let me guess.

Okay, I'm gonna need a hint.

It's kyra's stuff. Kyra's stuff.

Kyra's stuff.

I'm gonna need another hint.

I finally cleaned out her room.

I thought it was about
time that I showed her

I'm acceptin' the fact
that she's moved out.

I accepted her decision the
second she got off the front porch.

[doorbell rings]
there's dr. Todd.

Everybody, act sane.

Hi. I'm looking for a
barbra jean and brick.

[chuckles] I'm barbra jean.

And brickhead's over there.

It's brock. Brock, with an "o."

Oh, I'm sorry. My last patients
cried all over my papers.

Hi. I'm van. Hi.

I suppose my wife cheyenne has
told you all about our problems.

Uh, actually, no.

But I'm sure we'll be able to get to the
bottom of whatever is bothering you.

Okay.

Wow. This is weird, but i...

I kinda feel safe.

[reba] ha, hey!

♪ my roots are
planted in the past ♪

♪ though my life
is changing fast ♪

♪ who I am is who I want to be ♪

♪ a single mom who
works too hard ♪

♪ who loves her
kids and never stops ♪

♪ with gentle hands ♪

♪ and the heart of a fighter ♪

♪ I'm a survivor ♪♪

Are you gettin' rid of
kyra's stuff? Yeah, kind of.

Is it because she
didn't clean her room?

Yes.

Oh. I... I gotta
go do something.

- Hey, mom.
- Oh, hey, honey.

Thanks for comin' over. I thought it
was about time that I gave you this.

But that's my
stuff... From my room.

In a box in the
kitchen. Your turn.

I... I can't believe you
went though my stuff.

- Why are you gettin' so mad?
- If you don't know,
then I'm not gonna tell you.

What if you tell me, but I
promise to keep it to myself?

- Kyra!
- How do we define conflict?

You think this is funny? You
think my feelings are a joke?

How do I know what your feelings
are? You never tell me what's goin' on.

I didn't plan this,
I swear. [Chuckles]

Reba, you should join
us. I could help, you know.

If you can get her to talk
to me, brick'll pay you double.

You can't be serious. Therapy?

You can't be serious. Double?

I'm so fed up, I'll ask
anybody for help.

But I can't watch you walk away
without knowin' what happened. So park it.

Fine. But you
can't make me talk.

That's right. Don't
say anything, kyra.

I don't feel safe anymore.

Okay, here we go. Kyra,
have a breakthrough.

Uh, therapy isn't as simple
as the kind you see on tv.

Although, if any of you are
connected with the television industry,

I have got a great
idea for a new show.

Look, I just wanna say up
front, I don't wanna do this.

And I'm betting you're
the first one to cry.

Okay. For our first exercise,

We are going to be sharing
the things that bother us.

Oh, good idea.
Kyra, start sharing.

well, no. Not so eager, beaver.

I want you to...

I want you to pair off with someone
other than who you're here with.

I call reba! Ow!

Van! Mr. H!

All right, we're good.

I'm not gettin' stuck
with kyra. I want mom.

Let go! She's my mom!

Ow! I'll k*ll her before
I let you take her.

All right, freeze. What
did we just learn here?

That I picked the wrong seat.

No. That you're
all playing it safe.

You know, sharing should be
difficult, maybe even a little painful.

That's why I get to pick
your partners, all right?

So, I want, yes, you with you.

- [Whines]
- and you with you.

- No, no, no, no!
- Yes. And you with you.

- [Screams]
- oh, no.

- Who made him the boss?
- A university in mexico.

Now, I know we all like to pretend
that we don't have any problems,

But conflict resolution only works if we
admit there are some things that bother us.

So, even the slightest
little resentment, bring it up.

- This is takin' too long.
- Tell it to brick.

Here you go. Well, thank you.

And here's for you.

Okay. I just feel kinda awkward saying
bad things about your father to you.

Please, I live with mom.

Okay. Well, for one thing,
he has no sense of romance.

I thought it'd be cute if we
got matching name tattoos.

You know, simple, classy...

Tattoos on the butt.

But he wouldn't
do it. He wouldn't?

No! [Scoffs]

They just started talking.
How can they be so mad?

Shh! I can't read kyra's
lips with you yackin' at me.

I'm supposed to be sharing.

Okay, fine. Let's
get this over with.

Tell me everything that
bugs you about barbra jean.

Actually, this will make it
faster. You do one, I'll do one.

Well, to be honest, I don't
have a problem with barbra jean.

In fact, our life is one
never-ending slice of bliss.

Brock, I know her.

You're right. She's driving me crazy.
Check this out. The other night...

So, what's going on
with you and mrs. H?

Drop it, van. But we're
supposed to share, kyra.

Okay, then you start. Tell me
all you hate about cheyenne.

I don't think so. Why not?

Because I don't remember everything
I say, and you'll make something up.

Okay, fine. Doesn't
matter anyway.

Cheyenne already told
me all about your problems.

No, she didn't.

Yes, she did. She said
you're easily manipulated.

[No audible dialogue]

Oh, yeah? Well, let me tell
you something about cheyenne.

I love him to death, but every
time I tell him to do something,

He acts like he's
not even listening.

Who? Van.

Oh, of course.

But if that's all your dad
did, that wouldn't bother me.

Hey, it's my turn. Hmm.

Well, I wonder if van's telling
kyra how it's always your turn.

Because it's not just
making the bed. No.

It's having to arrange 14
stuffed animals in a specific order.

And binky can't be next to lulu
because they have "a history."

Which barbra
jean says is private.

And this is the really sick
part. I wanna know what it is!

Oh, man!

I didn't realize how much
stuff I was keeping inside.

It's great to be able
to talk to you like this.

Yeah, we never could talk about
barbra jean when we were married.

So, your turn, reba.
What's the deal with kyra?

I don't know. I'd love to tell you
what's wrong, brock, but I don't know.

She won't tell me. She just
gets mad and storms out.

Then I lie awake all night wonderin'
if she's difficult or if I'm a bad parent.

- It's because she's difficult!
- Okay.

[Mutters]

So there it is. That's how I
feel. Now you let me have it.

What you're saying makes
sense. Well, it does to me, kyra!

Wait a minute. You didn't do your
whole "make fun of van" thing.

You must be really upset.

So, you wanna talk about what's
bugging you? Mom cleaned out my room.

Not fair!

We have to clean our room 'cause
apparently she's "not our maid!"

Yeah, well, it's just
not my room anymore.

You wouldn't understand.

No, no, no. I think I do.

When I moved out two years ago,

My parents did the exact
same thing, only opposite.

Van... No, hear me out.

See, they kept my room the
exact way I left it. And I liked that.

I mean, I would've been upset if they
turned it into a sewing room or a pub.

'Cause that would mean that
that part of my life was over.

You do understand.

Mom wouldn't turn
my room into a pub.

No, I don't think she will.

But that would
be really awesome!

okay, people. It's
time for a break.

You can all relax and
stretch your legs for a bit.

Or you can come browse
through the dining room/gift shop.

first customer gets a
free dr. Todd coffee mug!

[Squeals]

Hey, look. Mm-hmm.

I'm not sayin' this is a total waste
of time, but I'm gettin' frustrated.

So either you tell me
why my daughter's mad

At me, or I'm closing
down your gift shop.

Well, it's going to happen.
It's just not soup yet.

[Chuckles] it's not a
jelly doughnut either.

What's that got to do with it?

Well, it's like I said in my
book, relationship soup.

We're still adding ingredients.

It has to simmer so all
the flavors can combine...

Into a rich, delicious broth.

Oh. Well, while we're waiting,

Why don't we make ourselves a
sandwich with all this bologna?

All right, there you go.

And just in case, god forbid, it
doesn't work out with the brickster,

There is my home phone number.

[Laughing] okay.

Hey, you know what?

I wasn't too happy
about doing this, but...

That whole sharing thing
was actually pretty good.

I got a lot off my
chest. Well, good. Good.

Then you're really gonna love
this next part. Yeah? What next part?

Well, we are going to share with
the group what we told each other.

It's called "tattling."

Tattling?

You are gonna be
the first one to cry.

Okay, everybody.
It is tattle time.

You know, people say to
me, "wouldn't it be simpler...

Just to tell the person who's
bothering you what's wrong?"

Well, I say, "simple or stupid?"

- Yeah.
- Stupid.

Yes, it is stupid.

Because people
just get defensive...

When they hear the same old
complaints from the same old person.

They just stop listening.
But they will listen...

To a neutral third party,

A person who I like
to call "the tattler."

and the tattler is a registered
trademark of dr. Todd, inc.

Now we're talkin'. Okay,
van, you tattle first.

- what's stuck in kyra's craw?
- [clears throat]

Did you graduate from
a university in mexico?

Okay, let's start with her.

Be honest and truthful.
You got 10 seconds.

Well, cheyenne is
worried that van is lazy.

but I'll tell ya who's lazy.

Brock... Is lazy! Yeah. What...

Every morning he gets up, gets
the paper, has a cup of coffee...

While I'm bustin' my
behind with the baby.

- I work, barbra jean!
- Yeah, I know you work.

You work on your short game and
your puttin' and your dirty joke tellin'!

You must be exhausted!

Anyway, that's what's
bothering cheyenne.

Okay, let's stick with
the exercise. Okay?

We're supposed to be telling what
the other person complained about.

Okay. Well, I'm supposed to say
what reba's problem is with kyra.

But can I just say this first?

You know, it's crazy that
binky and lulu have a history.

And it's even worse that
you won't tell me what it is!

Yeah, everything I do is crazy.

Like it's so crazy to wanna
get matching tattoos.

No. No it's not crazy if I'm a biker
named spleen and you're my old lady.

- Oh!
- Okay. Okay.

What if we did that and
then something happened?

What do you mean?
Like we'd get divorced?

I'm just saying that once
you've been divorced,

It makes you aware
that it's possible, okay?

Don't you think I
know it's possible?

If you could leave someone
as wonderful as reba,

You could certainly leave me.

But, honey, I choose hope.

I believe that our love is
a love that lasts forever.

And I am willing to
put my butt on the line.

Yeah, brock. You willin' to
put your butt on the line?

I'm willing to buy you a
platinum tennis bracelet.

Done! Ah!

Man, this guy is
good! Fix us next!

- No, no, no, no, no! We're next!
- No. You are still simmering.

now, who wants to tattle on van?

Kyra! I'm gonna get in so much
trouble, but then he's gonna fix it.

Yeah, kyra. Put
van in the hot seat.

Well, he said he loves his wife
very much and she's perfect.

[Gasps] liar!

I would never say that! I said cheyenne's
always mad at me and I don't know why!

You do too know why! You
always mess things up on purpose.

Why would I do that? So I
don't ask you to do 'em anymore.

Oh, I wish I was that smart.

Okay. Well, if you
are so innocent,

Why do you always
stop doing things?

You dressed
elizabeth once. Once!

Because you changed
her when I was done! Yeah?

Well, you put her frog
shirt on with the ducky pants.

And everyone knows
they're mortal enemies!

When you correct me, you
make me feel like I'm a bad father.

What? Like when she
goes out dressed like that,

You're really embarrassed of me.

Van, I am never
embarrassed of you.

And you've given her
tons of opportunities.

I'm sorry, van.

From now on,

I'm gonna let you do everything,

And I'm not even
gonna lift a finger.

You are a great
girl, cheyenne. Yeah.

How did I get so lucky? You!

all righty! That's
two down, one to go.

Who wants to tattle on the kid?

Okay, everybody pipe down.
Here's where brick pays double.

Okay, van, spill the mystery.

- Pass.
- Pass?

Pass? What do you mean
pass? There's no pass in soup!

I think if kyra wants you
to know, she'll tell you.

Maybe next workshop. Wow.
Grown-ups have so much fun.

[Reba] kyra, wait up.

Where do you think you're goin'?

You can't make soup if the noodles
are gonna get ticked off and leave.

I've had enough
dr. Todd for one night.

Oh, no. We're gonna finish this.

You wanna know what
I said to your dad...

After he stopped whinin' about
barbra jean's stuffed toys?

You don't have to tell me, mom.
I already know what you said.

Prove it! Come on, hot sh*t. Prove
it to me that you can read minds.

Okay, fine. You
said you hate me.

What? Oh, honey.

How could you
possibly think that?

The box. The box?

No, no, no. The box
means I love you,

That I finally accepted
your decision to move out.

No, it doesn't. It says you hate
me and I can never come back.

You know what our problem is?

The box is a two-faced liar.

So you don't hate
me for moving out?

No, sweetie. Of course not.

Now I'm gonna say
this loud and clear.

You will always
have a place here.

Okay? Okay.

Now it's soup.

Hey, reba. Barbra jean told
me the whole binky-lulu story.

It's just so sad! [Crying]

acme! [Coughing]