08x11 - Blood in the Water

[bunniefuu]

Previously on "Below Deck"...

I think he's nice looking.

I don't know if I like him,
but I kind of like him,

but I don't know.

Ah sh--.

Oh no.

My throat hurts, my head hurts,

and I just feel
like I'm going to pass out.

Cheers.

Relax, son of a bitch, relax!

You're bothering me
a little bit.

When Rachel drinks, she just
becomes a different person.

Number five!

Tina and Mark Milani.

They're avid boaters,

they socialize at
their local yacht club.

They're going to be trouble.

They're boat people.

They know everything
about what we do,

so they might be really picky.

You need to drink more water.

Delores is drunker
than a four peckered goat.

You are not
getting in the water.

I am going to be pissed.

Oh my God!

Son of a bitch!

Get her ass out of the water.

Your charter is over.

She's in the water, she's drunk.

She stepped over the line.

-We're sorry.
-Yep.

We agree.

-I'm not putting up with this.
-All right.

So we're headed
back to the dock.

Delores.

Walk by all
your friends in shame.

Go to bed.

No you weren't.

I'm done.

All right, we'll put her to bed.
Thank you, sir.

I'm ----ing hot.

First thing in the morning,
I'll drag everybody's ass back

to the dock and kick
their ass to the curb.

We're not taking those risks.
Not on my boat.

Come on, sweetie,
we're taking you to bed.

For everyone's sake, just...
just...

Give me your hand.
Come on, we're going to bed.

I think I can get downstairs.

Get her ass put away, now.

Wow.

Yep, copy that, Captain Lee,
she's going to bed.

Oh my God.

Can we just talk about that?

Yeah.

Wait, what just happened?

Okay. Delores is like,
I'm going to go swimming.

Captain Lee is like, no!
You must not go in the water!

So what the [bleep] does she do?
She ----ing jumps in!

She dives in, yeah!

Delores!

It's called Does It Look Like
I Give A [bleep].

I saw her like,
mermaid necklace,

and I was like, oh,
you're a mermaid, like same.

Hey.

Captain Lee is pissed.

-Is she down?
-She's in the shower.

We're all in trouble.

Oh my God.

Okay, here's the deal.

I can't take the chance
of her deciding

she wants to go for
a god damn swim.

Copy that, do you want
someone to be directly outside

her door the whole night?

Or at the top of the stairs.

Okay, copy that.

We're done, we got to go to bed.

Oh my God,
I can't believe how this went.

Delores, you ----ed
our whole charter.

You did, you did.

Eddie, Eddie, Francesca,
the guests are all now

in their cabins, let's
figure out a watch schedule.

Copy that, I'm on my way.

What the [bleep] is happening?

Okay, that's it.
I got to go to bed.

Yeah.

Eddie, Izzy.

Oh, does she want to
get up right now?

Go ahead, Iz.

We've had a little
bit of an incident.

Do you want to include
Izzy in this?

She went to bed...

Well, she was feeling
sick, so...

The main stairwell.

[yawn]

-What do you want me to grab?
-You're going to help me?

Yes, I'll help you.

You can start taking
the decorations down.

I got your back.

What happened?

A guest drank too much
and got out of hand.

So now we all have
to take posts and stay up.

To make sure she doesn't leave.

And make sure she doesn't leave.

So we're like ----ing
prison duty.

Yeah.

Do you have a hat like this?

No, why the [bleep] would I?

You should.

[laughing]

If you see her,
you gotta be like, aloha!

----ing bull-rush her.

[screaming]

That would be fun.
We could just like, hang out.

Hey Rob.

So there's been like a ----ing
incident with the guests.

We all have to take shifts, now.

But yours is at 3:30, okay.

And I need you to be
up at 5:00AM.

All right, go back to sleep.

I'll see you in the morning.

[snoring]

-What?
-You want to hang out for a bit?

Sure.

Okay.

Oh yeah.

[slapping]

[bleep]

Oh my...

What's going on, Iz?

Eliz...
is Elizabeth in here?

No, I don't know about...

That's such bullsh--.

I'm ----ing sick.
All I want to do is go to bed.

All right.

Have the best time, kids.

But there's no way I can sleep.

It smells like a sweaty,
manky hostel in here.

Like, it is just feral.

Elizabeth is in my room...

-Night.
-Night.

I just want to go to bed.

Sorry, sorry.

I know, I know,
I know, I'm sorry.

Five minutes!
She lost five minutes sleep.

Why are we making
a big deal out of this?

[bleep] Izzy.

I don't mean [bleep] Izzy,

I mean...

That's what I meant.

Never again, I'm sorry.

[sighs]

Let's get this
the tender up okay?

I'll go and prepare the crane.

Eddie, can I get you
to the bridge, please?

On my way.

Also, Chess, could
you join him?

Copy.

-Good morning.
-Good morning.

So, our problem child
hasn't arisen, yet?

No.

Yeah, I've decided
she's going to go.

Okay. What about the rest
of everyone else?

Uh...

[sighs]

I haven't decided
how I'm going to do that yet.

But um, I'm going
to chat with them.

They're going to have
to rearrange their priorities,

and we'll see
if they're willing to do that.

All right.

My God.

Yeah.

Good morning.

No, you're the first one up.

Morning.

Uh, I think Captain Lee
would like to speak to you.

Yeah.

Come on in.

-Good morning.
-Good morning.

How are you doing this morning?

-Oh, you know.
-Not feeling so happy.

Okay, so, she's got to go.

Well, I think
that's the best call.

You know.
She knows better.

I think all her friends would,
uh, agree with this one.

She's the only [bleep] up.

The rest of the charter
guests shouldn't be punished,

so as long as they're good
with it, Delores is toast.

As soon as she's up,
have her pack her bags

and have her escorted ashore.

Very good.

So we'll wipe the slate clean,
and move on.

-Thank you.
-Appreciate it.

This is the weakest ----ing
anchor wash system.

I could pee harder than that.

[door knocking]

-Hi.
-Hi, how are you?

-Fabulous.
-Okay.

So, we talked to the captain.

Because I went swimming.

Not so much that you
went swimming,

that you went swimming
when he told you not to.

Multiple times.

I thought we were going to say,

"No one's going to
tell us 'no,' anymore."

On this trip.

It's a safety issue, though.
Captain's orders.

Swimming at night, regardless
if you're drunk or not,

is dangerous.

We say yes, as much
as possible on a super yacht.

You know, but when it comes
to safety, that's paramount.

I had an experience once,

I was on a boat in
the south of France.

And one of the deck hands
on the yacht next to us

jumped in the water
and went free diving.

And he never returned.

We were all out there
searching on all of our tenders

that whole night
and couldn't find him.

It's a massive safety issue.

So, the captain has decided
to get you off the yacht.

-Now.
-Okay.

We're waiting on one departure.

As soon as that happens,
then we're going

to pull the hook
and be out of here.

-How long will you be?
-Ten minutes.

Okay, I'll let the tender know.

Thank you.

Sh--.

I'm ----ing tired.

Yeah.
We all are.

Damn it.

Oh.

-I love you.
-We'll catch up.

You guys have fun.

If we drop it, at least
we know she can swim for it.

Okay, Captain Lee,
she is in the tender,

they're letting go of lines.

-All in.
-Perfect.

We had a great night.

Morning, Captain Lee.

Good morning, how are you?

Well?
[laughing nervously]

We came to have fun, and that's
just a total fun wrecker.

Time to move to a
new anchorage, get a new look.

We are.

Eduardo, let's get out of here.

Copy that.

Uh, Lee, Lee, Delores
just hopped off the tender.

She hopped off the tender?

God damn it.

What the [bleep]?

Are you ----ing serious?

Stand-by, Eddie.

What the hell?

-Son of a bitch!
-Oh my God.

-What the [bleep]?
-God damnit!

Are you ----ing serious?

What, did she really?

Captain Lee, I have eyes on
her from bridge deck aft.

-Are you kidding me?
-Wow.

Oh my God.

Son of a bitch!

Oh my God!

What the hell.

[laughing]

Copy that.

Oh my gosh, Delores!

Oh man, I'm going
to burn my bacon.

Girl's got spirit.

I am just...

-Stunned.
-Yes.

Yeah.

I've never been a big, I Told
You So, kind of person, but yep.

Called that one, right.

You believe that sh--?

Instead of bye Felicia,
from now on

it's going to be like,
Bye Delores!

It's gonna be one of those days.

----ing Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.

Starting off to a
slow start today, huh?

Okay, great.

All right, Eddie,
let's get out of here.

Copy that.

All right, here we go.

This bitch is
about to get so muddy.

All right, anchors
at the water line,

you might want to drag
it around a little bit,

she's got a tad bit
of mud on her.

No problem, got it covered.

How did you sleep?

Terribly.

Well, no wonder you're such
a ----ing grumpy ass mood.

It's because I haven't
freaking slept like two days.

Really.

-My third roommate.
-Your third roommate?

My third roommate.

So I had Izzy come up into
my cabin at 3:30 this morning.

I'm like,
what the hell is going on?

Why did she come in?

Because Elizabeth and James
were snuggling in her bed.

Ew.

-I know.
-Ew!

I know!

That's not cool.

-No, not cool.
-Okay.

Well, I'm going to talk
to Eddie about that.

Yeah.

Why can't they just like,
do it in the stairwell.

That's romantic.

-Great angles.
-Ugh.

Anchor's home.

Okay.

I'm going to go wake James up.

You two want to go take
a break right now, you can.

Step on his face.

He got the most sleep
out of bloody anybody.

Almond and blueberry.

Perfect.

Hey, I'm sorry about last night,
I heard what happened.

And um, we're going
to deal with it.

Yeah, yeah.

We need you to be rested.

Not playing musical beds?

And I know you're not
feeling well, as well, so.

-Thanks, I appreciate it.
-Yeah, no problem.

So we're still doing
a horseback riding today?

I really don't want to
do anything nice for them.

They ----ed us over last night.

Good morning, sunshine.
We're underway right now.

I'll be ready for 9:00, yeah
I'll be on deck for that.

Copy.

Do you guys want to have a
seat at the table and we can...

Yes.

We have some fruit
and muffins and croissants.

-Good morning.
-Hi.

-Did you just get up?
-Yeah.

Boy, those muffins
look beautiful.

Do you guys have an
update what's going on?

-We're one guest down.
-Delores is gone.

She's gone already?

We got to get
their internet here,

so we can stalk other boats.

My yacht stalker app's
going to be going crazy.

-Oh yeah.
-My Sienna has moved.

English is east of Jolly.

We are ready to go when you are.

It's about three minutes out.

Copy.

How are you feeling, like...

Grumpy, I'm ready to k*ll
someone, I'm like, sick.

Why are you smiling at me?

-Why are you smiling?
-Now she's smiling.

Why is everyone smiling?

Francesca, Francesca, Rachel,

all French toasts
are completely plated

and are being
expedited upstairs.

Yes, let's expedite this.

Elizabeth.

Yep, I'll get started
on that now.

Hello.

I need to talk to you.

-About what?
-About cabins.

Let's talk.

This is not acceptable.

Like, what the [bleep],

like, I honestly can't deal
with her anymore.

I'm a little ----ing
bored with it.

I've given her way too
many ----ing chances.

I know it's middle of the season

but I can't keep ----ing
following up on this.

Blood in the water.

I'm going to Captain Lee,
this is not acceptable.

Okay.

Francesca is on a ----ing
warpath to att*ck Elizabeth,

like, in front of the captain.

And that would
be a huge mistake.

Maybe before you
go to Captain Lee,

let me have a word with him.

Okay, but I'd like to be there.

Yeah, we'll talk.

I think going straight
to Captain Lee is going

to be barking up
the wrong tree right away.

Well, ----ing everyone's
barking up my ----ing tree.

[laughing]

I'm thinking over
on my starboard side

might be the place to go.

And drop, two sh*ts.

Two sh*ts, long stay at 11:00.

Grab that ball,
you can leave the flag up.

That's...
that's good, good, good.

-Nice job.
-She tight.

Delores jumped
out of the tender.

We were all thinking
the same thing.

What he was thinking,
like, what?

We all thought the same thing,
it's like, what? What?

Now, she's going to
go back to wherever

she's going right now,
and try not...

Personally, I think
we're better off like this.

How is the French toast?

-Very good.
-It was really good.

These guests are so nice
now that Delores has left.

What else can we make Eddie do?

Put the slide up.

They are pleasant, and polite.

Would anyone like another
coffee or anything?

-Thank you.
-Yeah, thank you.

Maybe Captain Lee
should thr*aten

to cancel every charter.

I would definitely get
more sleep if that happened.

I'm going to go
put my suit on, though.

-Get some sun?
-Get some sun.

I'll go with you.

Uh-huh, yeah, yeah.

Make sure
your valves are closed.

Salsa mother----ing verde.

Ah, that feels good.

-Yep.
-Oh yep, she's closed.

-May I have a crepe?
-Yeah.

Mmm.

Ash, Ash, check in
with Elizabeth

and see if
she needs help with Cabins.

Copy that.

It's salsa mother----ing verde.

Treat your mother----ing self!

[cheers]

That could not have
gone any smoother.

Good work.

All right, man, let's
go help with the sea toys.

All crew, all crew,
the slide is good to go.

Hi, it's Francesca here,
from My Sienna, how are you?

Oh my God, this looks
like so much fun.

We have guests that
requested horseback riding.

[screams]

Oh God!

Oh my God!

Any tension here?

No, I'm just tired.

For some really weird,
unknown reason.

Izzy and James are a wonderful,
old married couple.

And I think if we could
all look forward

to having that kind of
relationship,

um, we're ----ed.

Cut through this tension
with the jet surf.

[groans]

Coming up...

I'm liking it,
good entry, good entry.

Okay, okay, okay.

Oh!

Oh, sh--.
[bleep]

Green, go faster.

There you go, get it down.

Hey Iz, you're going to be
with the horses later.

I'm excited to go horse riding.

I feel sore and tired, but I'm
kind of trying to ignore that.

Growing up, I was
the weird horse girl.

I spent my childhood begging
my parents to buy me a pony

and I got my first job
at McDonald's

at 14 to help pay
to lease a pony.

Horses are gentle giants,
just like me.

How's things going
between you and Iz?

-Oh, we're good.
-You sure about that?

She's a little bit pissy
with me this morning.

She's been kind of voicing some
frustrations about last night.

I'm going to have to have like
a conversation with

you and Elizabeth, about keeping
work and pleasure separate.

Okay?

Yeah, man.

And be nice to Izzy.
Please?

You should,
you should pay her a few.

Let's not get carried away.

Mm, come on, now.

[screams]

I'm liking it,
good entry, good entry.

Okay, okay, okay.

Oh.

Might want to k*ll that.

I thought you were going
to throw me the line.

[bleep]

All crew, all crew,

guests are getting ready
to depart for the horses.

Yeah, if you guys want to start
loading up, we can go.

I'm ready.

You got some readers
in your bag for me, or?

-I do.
-Cool.

Hey guys, everybody, hold on.

No.

Yeah.

One deep look in your blue eyes,

and she couldn't wait
to get on the dock.

I have two older brothers.

But one of them once
zipped me in a suitcase

and left me at the park.

So it's kind of neat that me
and James are becoming closer.

Like two magnets,
the closer we come,

the stronger the attraction is.

No, I'm just trying to think
of the conversation we have

with Eddie, because he
might still get upset.

She hit the dock.

Shark was trying to grab her,
we pulled her out of the water

and saved her
from certain death.

Thanks for that advice, mate,
that's very useful.

And then she wrote us both
into the will and we're set.

[laughing]

-I got you, Chris.
-Oh!

Come on, babe!

I told you I had you.

Ponies on the beach!
Ponies on the beach!

Oh, look how sweet they are!

Oh, this tastes like
there's alcohol in there.

Mm.

Does anybody else
want to use the...

Nobody else wants to use
that jet ski.

Pull him in.

The good news,
the guests had a good ride.

Great.

The bad news?

The bad news I'll pass to James.

Oh, sure is.

Someone came in too hot.

Okay.

Well, nobody was hurt?

No, she was fine.
She was all right.

She? Who?

-The blonde one.
-Karen.

Little apple?
No biting my fingers.

Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.

Of course it was
----ing Karen.

These guests,
they're exactly

what I thought they
were going to be.

They're just like mumsy and
poopsey like, going to like,

over to yacht club,
that you're part of, hmm.

It's stupid.

I mean, we could fix it,
it's just ----ing sucks.

You've got some big ass teeth.

I'm done with this
----ing charter.

All right, let's lift
these things up.

-Yeah.
-Now.

Hi, sweetheart.

Good job.

Ponies.

Yeah, you're a hungry one.

-Wow.
-Let's go.

We're riding ponies
on the beach.

Oh my God, it...
This is awesome.

-Yes.
-It's nice, eh?

What kind of style or service

do you think would
be good for tonight?

They wanted an extravaganza.

So that to me just means,
just everything at once.

I love seafood extravaganza.

I love the word extravaganza.

I'm not going to lie.

Extravaganza!

Amazing.

Can I say it again?
Extravaganza!

I ----ing love extravaganza.

-I'm down for this.
-Yeah.

Do you need to
continue with this?

Yeah.

Oh!

Hi everyone!

Hey!

How y'all doing?

[cheering]

Perfect.

[shouting]

I've got you, don't worry.

Fresh towel?

Yes. Thank you.

Such a fun day.

Are the conch fritters
all right in the fryer?

Yeah, they're perfect now,
I just take them out.

Thank you.

I'm gonna take
the slide down.

What goes up must come down.

So are you still okay
for dinner at...

-8:30.
-Yes.

Yeah.

Captain Lee is
eating on his own tonight?

Yeah?

If he feels like it, he's more
than welcome to join us.

Okay, fantastic.

Uh, oh yeah.

What?

I need the toilet, so, hurry up
and take your face off.

Uh, I'm literally about
to sh--, shower, shave.

Like, literally.

All right,
so can I take a whizzle?

No.

Why you acting so ----ing
tough all of a sudden?

Missed out, didn't you?

Fine, I'm going to go piss off
the side of the boat.

-[door knocking]
-Come in.

-Hello.
-Hey, kiddo.

Just went up and
checked on the guests.

And?

They would like you to have
dinner with them at 8:30?

Okay.

I don't want them to feel like
I hold them responsible

for somebody's bad behavior.

So, put a smile on your face
and a hat on, and suck it up.

That's why I get paid
the big bucks.

My ability to suck it up.

Okay, no problem.

Chess, Chess, Eddie.

Hey, Eddie, I'm ready.
Where are you?

Main deck.

Elizabeth, Elizabeth, could you
come to main deck aft, please?

On my way.

Bring your boo.

That means you, James.

Yeah, I got that,
I'm on my way, buddy.

I feel like I'm getting brought
into the principal's office.

I don't know what's happening.

Just take a deep breath.

-I feel like I'm in trouble.
-Yeah.

Last night is why we're
having the chat.

Coming up...

-What are your symptoms?
-Sore throat.

-Yeah.
-Congested.

-Yeah.
-Run down.

We can't have people
dropping like flies.

The hits just keep coming.

I feel like I'm getting brought
to the principal's office.

Um, obviously you guys
started hooking up.

And that's great.
I'm happy about it.

We just want to make sure
in this work,

in this relationship,
and everything like that,

everything is compartmentalized.

That there's a time for you guys
and there's a time for work.

So James and Francesca
are having

a very serious
looking talk.

Oh wow.

I'm going to hide here.

Last night you both
were distracted,

and with all of this crazy
guest stuff happening,

we had to go into shift work.

Because of that reason,

I think you guys took
advantage of that kind of,

and then disrupted a
couple of other crew members

sleeping patterns.

So totally happy if guys
want to spend time together,

but please don't let it affect
the working environment.

We're all trying to just get
a job done as best we can.

So thank you, and
thank you very much.

Thank you, thanks guys.

Oh, how far I've come,
now giving advice

about hooking up on a yacht,

when a few years ago,
I was hooking up on a yacht.

Great.

Pretty nuts.

I get it, they're going
to do what people do

when they're stuck in
quarters for a long time.

All right, thank you.

But James and Elizabeth
shouldn't be messing

with people's sleep.

They shouldn't be messing
with people's personal space.

We've laid the ground work.

-Next time they [bleep] up...
-Yeah.

Then they're going to get called
to the principal's office.

You know, this is just
a verbal warning.

If that doesn't work,
then you can start chopping.

-I totally agree.
-Yeah.

Talk, then chop.

I'm hoping that doesn't happen.

Yeah.
Let's do this dinner.

All right, let's rip
this ----ing head off

this ----ing lobster,
let's do it.

Karen, it's going
to be so fun tonight.

-I know.
-You all right?

Yeah, yeah, I'm trying...

I'm in a hurry,
because dinner's at 8:30.

Right after you.

[cheering]

Izzy, do you want to
wear some costume stuff?

Yes.

This would really suit you.

I like that.

She's looking for a reason to
take another stripe off you.

It terrifies me.

Oh, she annoys me, though.

So what are we supposed to do,
just like, kind of ignore you?

-Maybe.
-Yeah.

All right, I'll keep it serious.

Do you want to... do you want
to go for a drink tomorrow?

Wait, really?

Yeah, if you're interested.

That's really nice.

Yeah, I'd do that for you.

[laughing]

The secret is out.
Me and Liz are dating.

-All right.
-Yeah, again?

-I'd love that.
-We're ramping it up.

We're going to go on a date,
we're going to get a few drinks.

Don't give a sh--
what any one's got to say.

It's like a Romeo
and Juliet story.

[laughing]

Hello!

Wow.

Oh, wow!

Oh, it's beautiful.

It's amazing.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

You got a conch fritter.

Yeah, it's pretty tasty.

Seafood extravaganza.

Rachel, Rachel, all
guests up on bridge deck aft.

Copy that.

Cod, I'm like,
get her done, some beef.

I'm just going to smash
some lobster on top of that.

Just [growl], it's amazing.

Because you...

it's extravaganza!

Guess I better get out there.

Yeah, they're waiting on you.

Bastards.

Can't wait to get the [bleep]
off of here tomorrow.

Francesca, Francesca,
we're ready to roll with the,

uh, shrimp cocktail
and the conch fritters.

Please have a seat.

All of the little appetizers
are coming out.

Thank you Captain Lee
for joining us tonight.

Thank you for having me again.

Yeah, thank you.

A glutton for punishment.

[cheering]

We love the pop.

I love that you love the pop.

We've got some
conch fritters here.

Oh please, yes.
Thank you.

Oh my gosh, conch fitters.

How are you getting on, Rachel?

You don't need an extra
pair of hands, do you?

Not right at this second.

I don't like James.

Not a fan.

You're going to clog
up the galley.

He doesn't really do
anything, he just kind of like,

stands there
and holds the towel and poses.

That is the
last person Elizabeth

should be fraternizing with.

Dude's a douche.

So good.

It is delicious.

Go to sleep.

You're like walking dead right
now, go on, get out of here.

You're relieved of your command.

Okay.

Thank you for your help.

-Are you hungry?
-Yes.

Oh, good, there's a
lot of food coming.

This is going
to be ready to go.

Like, if you don't
mind running it.

Thank you.

And if you won't mind
opening this packet

and then I can put this
on top of the tray.

Oh my goodness.

I have some lobster.

[gasps]

-Look at that.
-My goodness.

Ooh!

I could probably think
of a million things

I'd rather be doing than
dinner with the guests.

But Jesus Christ,

I've never seen so many
dead lobster in one spot.

This seafood extravaganza has
definitely got the vaganza.

This is way more stressful
than driving any kind of boat.

Okay, I got it.

Yeah, that's
a wow factor for sure.

That's it?
High five.

Woo!

-Thank you.
-You're welcome.

That's a lot of meat,
right there.

Yeah.

I love these little
mini cast iron pans.

Oh, that's delicious.

Such a nice, tight fit.

I think you need to go to bed.

All right, I'll see you
in the morning.

Goodness, this tastes so good.

You okay?

Oh, yeah.

-What's going on?
-My feet are k*lling me.

Oh sh--.

Go and have a 15 minute--
No, no.

-Put your feet up.
-I like--

It's fine,
it's the perfect time.

I just got to just keep going.

I'm literally antsy, like,
I want to just get stuff done.

-Okay.
-No, but thank you.

Do you know what grade the
pirate got in, in school?

-No.
-High C's.

-Serious?
-Yeah.

That's adorable.

You got the interior crew,
the exterior crew.

And we can't ever
really come together

without getting in trouble.

It's fine, she said
I can rest my leg.

She is a demon.

She's going to call you
now on the radio.

I cannot win with Francesca.

I'd like us to get along,

I'd like her to just
be happy with me.

But, at this point,
whatever you need, girl.

Just don't ----ing fire me.

Chess is lit, she's just
been at the bottom

of the stairs
just staring at us.

So much for those ten minutes.

Oh God, who spells
"Cumfy" with a U?

-Cumfy.
-Cumfy.

It's the softest
of all martial arts.

No, so then I did do it.

I had just topped off
all their drinks...

Coming up...

[growling]

She's scary when she drinks.

-[screaming]
-Oh my God, no, no, no.

Oh, she's on the microphone.

I want some ----ing
dirty ass sh--.

I feel like vomiting right now.

I grew up owning horses
and never made it to the beach,

and so that was very cool.

Yeah.

It was amazing day.

[glass breaking]

Uh-oh.

Why did that go over?
I'm so sorry, I don't know.

Oh my God.

That's what I call
alcohol abuse.

I'm not abusing!

Oh my gosh!

But it was a waste.

[coughing]

Thanks for coming back up.

I'll see you guys
in the morning.

That was great, thank you.

-Thank you so much.
-Thank you.

We'll see you in the morning,
thank you.

-See you in the morning.
-Bye.

So did you say you
were staying around here after,

or you're going back to Byron?

My flight right now
is booked out on the 24th.

Oh cool.

Just to kind of like,
decompress a little.

Are you going to Canada at all?

No.

Are your parents in Canada?

-They are.
-Yeah.

-But you're so close.
-I know.

When I first met Rob,
I had high hopes.

I know.

But talking to Rob is like....

Conversations about nothing.

No, not into it.

[singing]

Eh, yeah.

-Amazing vacation.
-Amazing vacation.

-To a special someone.
-Oh my God.

Don't you wish you had
rich friends now?

-That's--
-Right?

Right.

I think they're going
to be going down soon.

-Yeah.
-So that's a good thing.

Yeah.

Yeah, man, it's been fun.
Good luck.

It's time.

-Night guys.

-Night.
-Night.

There she is.
What do we need to do?

All right, I'll be back
in a sec.

So do I, man.
So do I.

Oh yeah, thank you.

[laughing]

[snoring]

James.

-Good morning, kids.
-Good morning

Would anyone like a mimosa?

-Oh sure.
-Yeah.

Twist my arm.

And today,
her special is Eggs Benedict.

-Morning, sunshine.
-Morning.

You're up early.

Oh, God.

[snoring]

Okay, Rachel, Rachel,
they are seated.

Copy that, I've already
started poaching.

Oh.

What are your symptoms?

-Sore throat.
-Yeah.

-Congested.
-Yeah.

Run down.

Well, that settles it then.

I'm putting you down,
and you're going to stay down.

I can still have
the lines and stuff.

No, you need to stay down.

Go wake up James.

Get in bed and
----ing stay there. Okay?

I don't want to get sent back
to bed, but I'm ----ing tired.

My body is broken.

I just need to rest.

Thank you, Eddie.

I'm going to back into bed.

I feel like I'm going to die.

Wow.

My God, they're going
to love that.

If you dropped out,
it would be fine.

If I drop out the boat
would probably sink.

Your arms are tiny.

[bleep] off.

You got a sprinkle of
green magic on there.

Boom.

-You going to come up?
-Yeah.

Oh, that's beautiful,
thank you.

-Woo!
-Wow.

-Morning, Cap.
-Morning, Sunshine.

-How you doing?
-I put Izzy down.

She's sick.

I said that's it.
Go to bed, stay there.

Cold, flu?

Sore throat. Congestion.

Put her in
a guest room tonight.

We can't have people
dropping like flies.

When you get somebody
that is not feeling well,

you isolate them.

You don't need your whole crew
coming down with it

and then possibly
infecting your guests.

[coughing]

We know it's more than
likely not coronavirus

because there isn't one case
of coronavirus on the island.

But we're taking
the proper precautions.

-The hits just keep coming.
-Yeah.

I'd like to get underway,
right away.

-Okay.
-All right.

Oh, look at this bite.

Oh my gosh,
it smells so good.

Hey, I'm ready whenever
you are, Cap.

Let's do it.

Are we off the bottom?

She's off the bottom.

Anchor's home.

We're going to go down and pack
and then enjoy the ride back.

We're going to be docking
in blues today

because we're going to
be getting our ass busted,

since it's just going to
be three of us docking.

There's a candy left,
do you want that?

Yeah, why not.

You're going to be doing
all starboard fenders,

once we get these fenders out.

You get out fenders that
are up on bridge deck,

and I'll come get these out.

All you can say is wow.

-I know.
-Wow.

-Oh my God.
-It's incredible.

-Ready on the stern?
-Ready on the stern.

You are clear in 15,
you can start your spin.

Moving to the
wingstation.

Copy, moving to wing.

Starboard side ground
tackle is mid ship.

Start kicking her back.

This is a bit scary, huh?

I know.

Port side closing.

Soon as that comes tight,
lock this one off.

We're all locked in.

-Good job, Eddie.
-Thanks, Cap.

Thank you.

I like the way she's sitting,
how about you?

-Yeah.
-I'm happy with it.

-We're tight.
-Tight.

Woo!

-Perfect.
-Let's go get in our whites.

Great. Got my sippy cup?
Check.

[coughing]

Deck crew, let's all go ahead
and get their luggage.

Some of these bags
don't say big tip.

Attention all crew,

I need everybody on the aft deck
in your whites right now.

Copy.

I think you need
an alcoholic beverage.

I don't want to go.

Aww!

-Thank you so much.
-Thank you for everything,

Rachel, thank you
so much, you're amazing.

Everything was so lovely.

Aww, you're welcome.

-Thanks for all your help.
-My pleasure, man.

-Thank you.
-Thanks, sweetie.

We had a hell of a trip.

Everything was fantastic.

Rachel, we loved your food,

and you guys went the extra mile
to make up for our first night.

You are not getting
in the water.

This is not an option and
it's not open for debate.

-Delores, you don't like sharks.
-Oh my God!

Son of a bitch!

Oh, we're so sorry to everybody
that was affected by that.

-So we hope you all enjoy that.
-Thank you very much.

-Thank you.
-You worked hard for it.

Thank you all.

-Bye, take care.
-Ciao.

-Bye, take care.
-Thank you.

Bye, thank you very much.

-Let's go to work.
-All right.

-So Izzy's not well.
-Yeah, I know.

Um, so we're going to move
her into a guest cabin,

because then we need
to sterilize the cabin,

get that all sorted, and then
we'll move on to ironing.

-Perfect.
-All right, perfect.

Awesome, cool!

Guess we got to get out of
our whites, get into our blues,

and then we'll come out
and bust it out.

Can I ask you a question, Eddie?

Yes, sir.

Without my favorite guy.

Um, is there any chance
today I might be able

to take Liz out for a date?

[bleep] it, yeah, sure man.
[bleep] it.

Yeah, after work,
that would be fine.

Nudge, nudge, wink, wink,
say no more, say no more.

[bleep]

Go, go, go.

No.

Izzy, your bed is made.

I think this will make
her feel better.

Hey, Izzy.

You are going to take
your pillows,

go to the VIP room,

and you're going to get
back in bed and stay there.

[bleep].
I hate being sick.

You're quarantined.

I'm still tired.

I hate it.

Oh.

Attention all crew,
attention all crew.

I need everybody in
the crew mess in five minutes.

Copy.

How are we doing, kids?

Captain.

What a charter, huh?
Delores.

-Whoa.
-Oh my gosh.

That was crazy.

She was a handful
to say the least.

And everybody handled
that situation quite well.

So the tip was
$16,790 dollars.

Approximately
$1,400 dollars apiece.

Which is okay.

Things are better.

Trust me.

I'm thinking that Delores
was supposed to kick in

some money on
this group charter.

But [bleep] it.

Who is bunking with Izzy?

Make sure she gets that.

So, I think everybody did a
really good job this charter.

Docking today was, you guys,
deck crew, you guys nailed it.

Chef, your food was
just like, over the top.

-Thank you.
-Again.

Thank you.

What do you say
we take tomorrow off?

-Really?
-Yes.

I've arranged for you
guys to go to

a beach club called Catherine's.

-Ooh!
-Ooh!

Where you can eat,
drink, and be merry.

-Wow.
-Have some fun.

Have some down time.

My goal for the day off
is drinking, sunbathing,

listening to music,

drinking, sunbathing,
listening to music--

Yeah, that's it.

-Thank you.
-Thank you, Captain Lee.

Finally have a day off tomorrow.

I can't wait.

Coming up...

[animal noises]

[laughing]

Guys, just wanted to ask
a question to everyone.

So tonight, two options.

We can order food in,

or Rachel has food and we cook
it ourselves on the barbeque.

What do you guys reckon?
I don't really mind?

I'm easy, whatever.

Whatever--whichever one's
less work in the end.

I'm easy,
I'm on the fence, you know?

Yeah?

-See what happens.
-See what happens?

-Are you two going on a date?
-Yeah, they are.

That's what I wanted
to talk to you about.

Yeah, sure,
of course, go for it.

I have been babysitting

Elizabeth and James
this whole charter.

I'm too old for that.

They're going to go on a date,
let them go on a date.

I need a break.

No, you must work, all the time.

Hi.

This is cute.

-You think so?
-Yeah.

I'm like so excited.

As far as first dates go,
with most other girls,

you get that emotional wall
where you think, oh sh--,

I might need to,
I don't know, ease off a bit.

Big date.

Oh my God.

With Elizabeth, I'm not
getting those vibes.

I like her, she likes me,
let's see where it goes.

Oh!

I want him home
at a decent hour, okay?

Okay, Dad.

What are you guys going
to do tonight?

-Not much.
-Good.

-Is this it?
-Melinis.

Oh, nice.

-Hello.
-Hi.

Hi, can we get a table
for two, please?

And what would you guys like?

-Chardonnay?
-Sauvignon Blanc?

Rose.

-A Long Island Ice Tea.
-Oh my God.

-Do you want to get two of that?
-Yeah.

Two Long Islands, please.

All right, you can't
go wrong with that.

-Thank you.
-You're welcome.

Ooh, they have my favorite,
eggplant parmesan.

I don't know much
about eggplants.

I just know it's the emoji
used to describe something.

That's all I know about.

[laughing]

Two Long Islands.

I used to getting a starter,
getting two mains, and a desert.

You get a starter and two mains?

Usually.

That's amazing.

I've always been a big eater.

I love that, because
you're just so hungry.

I'm always hungry, yeah.

I will always be,
even if you come to me,

I'll give you whatever you want.

I like when people eat,
I've always been like--

Are you a feeder?

Yeah, I'm like
an old Italian grandmother.

Not like I'm a big cook.

It's not like the most
natural thing for me to like,

I'm like, cooking all the time.

I--I like cooking, though.

-I love cooking for someone.
-You do?

Yeah, I go above
and beyond, yeah.

Oh.

I don't mind doing dishes.

Good little job.

I'm just going to have
an amaretto on ice.

Amaretto.

Got to play like
a drinking game or something.

-That is strong.
-Ooh, that's nice.

Are we going up top or are we
staying right ----ing here?

-No, let's go up.
-Okay.

Eggplant parmesan.

Yeah?

I'm not.

-Truth or dare.
-Dare?

Yes.

I dare you to go down
right now and goat call.

Okay!

All right!

[screams like a goat]

[laughing]

Okay, that's it.

So what do you do
between working on boats?

My life has never been
consistent, after like, college.

Or like, after high school.

Is that a good thing, though?

Yeah, because it's led me here.

But these six weeks
are a lot of fun.

Yeah, I agree.

I don't know what I would do
if you weren't here.

I'm really happy I met you.

Yeah, it's been fun.

Should we head back to the boat?

I guess so.
Thank you.

You're welcome. We should do
that again.

-Yeah.
-Don't know what that was.

-Truth or dare.
-Ooh, dare.

Do an impersonation of James.

[groan]

I never get tired!

Oh, look at me, look at me!

Shall we go socialize,
or you want to stay awake?

Iz, can you come in here
and shave my back!

Oh my God!

High five!

Oh, that was lovely.

What do you want to do?

-Is it that time?
-Bed time.

Good night.

I'm going to bed, too.

-[laughing]
-What the [bleep]?

Shh!

[laughing]

Good night, y'all.
I'm going to bed.

-Yeah.
-I'm going to go do bed, too.

-Good night!
-Good night!

-Bye!
-Bye!

Have you met drunk Rachel, yet?

Okay, good.

Good night some bitch!

Good night.

[shrieks]

[heavy breathing]

[laughing]

Did you have a good night,
last night?

Yeah, it was fun!

-Sup!
-Sup.

Hey.

Do you know how
to get to Woodstock?

[laughing]

Hippies need not apply.

[laughing]

Are you a little hungover?

I don't get hangovers.

Don't be jealous.

There's vodka in there.

There's never vodka in there.

I might look like sh--, but
I don't feel like sh--.

Because I'm still drunk
from the night before.

It's going to be like
a mother----ing hurricane again.

----ing maniac.

Coming up...

[laughing]

Oh my God, no,
no, no, no, no, no.

We're here to ----ing
make music.

I want some ----ing
dirty ass sh--.

I feel like, like vomiting
right now.

Ready to have
this little beach day?

Yeah.

It's going to be like a
mother----ing hurricane again.

They're not going to
know what's hit them.

Hey, how you feeling?

So tired.

Yeah, you should probably
rest some more, today.

I want to come out.

I know.

Can I come out if
I just stay horizontal?

If you stay horizontal?

I'll stay horizontal
the whole day.

No drinking.

-No, no [bleep].
-Okay, good.

You guys can all get
absolutely wankered around me.

Some of us are already wankered.

Yep.

Oh my God.

Get out, let's go.

Let's get the [bleep] out
of here, Jesus ----ing Christ.

We're going.

-Yeah, me too, yeah.
-We doing this van?

-Okay, we know.
-Okay, go, go, go!

Just hiss at James
if he comes in

'cause I can't stand
that ----ing twat.

Motherf---er!

You're not a deckhand,
you're a dickhead.

God, I feel like I just
dodged the biggest b*llet.

[laughing]

Mm, mm, mm.

Seven days.

Are we going to charter
on your birthday?

Do you want another stripper?

-I'd be like--
-Bring back Mr. Sparkles?

Yes! Woo!

[laughing]

No, let's not!

[bleep]
Banana, there's a banana.

That's awesome.

-I got to pee.
-Don't pee your pants.

I'm prone to UTI's, I shouldn't
be holding in my bladder.

I need to go.

I will run into that wood.

Oh, absolutely.

Yeah, its like,
no time for cuddling right now,

-I have to go pee.
-Got to wee.

All right, guys,
I think we're here.

-I'm close enough.
-[laughing]

Catherine's Beach Club?

Get me out!

[laughing]

I'm zig-zagging, y'all.
I'm zig-zagging.

All right?
Oh, ow, oh.

-Okay.
-Tum, tum, tum.

Espresso martini!

Who wants to get
the drunkest today?

Super shallow.

Oh, that pizza's talking to me.

But I can't. No.

Get in the water.

-It's a Wong?
-Can you do the Baywatch exit?

-Oh my goodness.
-Apparently um, apparently.

Oh God.

You have really nice boobs.

[laughing]

-I'm just saying.
-What about my tits?

You've got bigger boobs than
I do, so that's just like--

Yeah, but these are just solid,
these aren't fun to touch.

That's beautiful.

I'm glad you've come
out today, though.

So am I.

I've missed you in the bedroom,
I'll be honest.

Really?

I miss seeing you half naked
every time I walk in.

Oh, that's really cute.

Ah.

This is nice.

[laughing]

You'll make a scene.

Yeah, that's the cocktail menu.

Cocktails?

-Go with some tuna tartar.
-Yum.

-And avocado and chicken.
-Sh-- yeah.

Whatever you guys do
is a fantastic idea.

I wonder what
Rachel is thinking about.

[screaming]

She's scary when she drinks.

[yelling]

Vicious.
She's like a Chihuahua.

[babbling]

She's just,
she's finding her groove.

She's a hot mess.

Oh, God.

I'm so grateful
for this day off.

Me too.

Oh, this is so nice.

I feel like I need to
lay on the sand by the water.

Got ginger martinis
on the way.

Oh yeah.

If you're going to get
day drunk and have a nap,

like, this is the spot.

What is music?
What's happening?

When did ----ing that happen?

Hi.

[gasps]

Oh my God, no,
no, no, no, no.

Oh sh--.

-Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
-Look, she's on the microphone.

I can't even look!

Oh my God, like, I feel
like vomiting right now.

We're here
to ----ing make music.

I want some ----ing
dirty ass sh--.

Oh my God!

-God damnit.
-I love it.

I'm loving every second of this.

I want some ----ing
famous, amazing.

Get off the ----ing stage.

That's what I want.

I want to work with you guys.

You know what?
[bleep] it.

Listen to me.

Come on. Come on.

Rachel!

I can't even look at her.

Two rules of the boat.

Don't embarrass yourself,
don't embarrass the boat.

You're obviously
embarrassing yourself.

But you're here as a crew and so
you're embarrassing all of us.

Walking away
from this situation.

Someone else can deal with it,
I'm not dealing with this.

-Rachel.
-Sorry guys.

I got to ----ing be a douche.

Rachel!

Next, on Below Deck...

Chef is having a difficult
time playing with others.

The alcohol starts flowing

and she just becomes a
totally different toxic person.

That's unfortunate.

He's ----ing [bleep].

Can you do me a favor
and not talk about me?

Suck my [bleep].

Chris and Erica
from Friendswood, Texas.

How are you, Chris?

And they also brought
a teacup Yorkie named Gigi.

Oh, you know what that means?

-Go poo-poo.
-Go poo-poo, Gigi.

No, you can't go down.

My stomach's really messed up.

Oh no.

Oh my God, what
the hell is going on?

I can't have the crew
dropping like flies.

I think we should get
a doctor onto the boat.

[groans]
[bleep]