02x15 - Harmony Family

[bunniefuu]

Tonight on "supernanny," jo meets

The harmony family.

In a house that's more like a -ring circus,

[Cries]

-Year-old grant is the ringmaster.

[Screaming]

And he's not afraid

To take his act... No!

On the road.

[Grunting] serving up discipline

Is tough for these parents.

As mom closes one door...

Locking the children outside?

A few minutes of quiet.

Grant opens another...

And sends dad packing.

Can jo bring a little harmony back to this family?

See where to go with this. I'm already sweating.

Or is there just too much grunt work... [Screams]

That needs to get done? No!

That's how he always talks to you? All the time.

[Screams]

♪♪♪

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪ ♪ johnny ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good, be good ♪ ♪ johnny ♪

♪ Johnny ♪

Let's take a look and see what family we've got here.

Hi, we're the harmony family.

I'm erin.

And I'm jacob.

I'm an r.n. At a local clinic.

And I work in construction.

We have three sons--

Jake, who's ,

Ian, who is ,

And grant is .

Grant is a mama's boy.

[Jacob] go have mommy dress you, hon.

[Erin] come on. Your pajamas are in here.

I cannot go to the bathroom by myself.

Can you step out so I can go to the bathroom, please?

[Screams]

I cannot leave the house... Hey, out!

Without him following me out the driveway.

[Crying]

Ooh, this little boy is very clingy.

[Jacob] grant gets angry, he'll bite the couch.

[Screeching]

Biting the armchair!

Ian, who is our middle child...

[Crying]

He's the instigator of the fights.

Hey, that's mine!

[Screams]

He does get into it with his brothers a lot.

Watch out! [Cries]

Oh, my word.

I want it! I want it!

Jake, he's got younger brothers who aggravate him quite a bit.

Ow!

I think I'm a disciplinary person.

Then don't get off the couch.

I discipline them when it's needed.

[Erin] we don't spit.

Hmm.

We do go out to eat probably at least three times a week.

We're usually prepared for embarrassment.

[Grunts]

[Crying]

Bedtime for grant-- we usually put him

In his bed to begin with.

He'll sleep for about four hours,

And then he will wake up. He will grab his pillow

And bring it into our bedroom. [Whining]

This is not good.

Quit saying that.

[Cries] stop!

I feel like

The family's falling apart.

So please help us.

You guys need some good help. I'm on my way.

Hi! Hello.

How are you? Pleased to meet you.

Pleased to meet you. I'm erin.

I'm jo.

Nice to meet you.

Hi, jake. Pleased to meet you. Jo.

This is grant. He's .

Hi, grant. Pleased to meet you. Shake jo jo's hand.

Can you shake her hand, say hi?

[Erin] this is jo.

Hi. Hello. Jacob.

Hi, jacob. Pleased to meet you. Jo. Pleased to meet you.

Hi! How are you, ian?

Pleased to meet you. Want to shake jo jo's hand?

Pleased to meet you.

I know that you've got issues that need to be resolved,

But we will get to the bottom of those.

So for now what I'm going to do is just watch the pair of you

And the family

And just kind of see how you're doing.

Okay. Sounds good.okay.

As soon as I arrived,

Mom had to go on an errand,

And that word seemed to rub grant the wrong way.

[Grant] no!

[Erin] mommy's gonna run to the store a little bit. Okay?

That's fine. I'll be right back, though.

[Jacob] any time erin leaves, grant will throw a fit.

He'll want kisses and want hugs from her.

And I'll end up grabbing him, and he'll kick and scream.

[Screeching]

Grant, I'll be right back, okay?

[Crying] I want to come!

That was horrible. Awful.

He just started chasing her down the road.

He was just running to catch up with the car.

Look at him running!

But then all of a sudden she stopped. What is she doing?

She's just making matters worse.

My word.

To see grant following me

Down the driveway when I'm trying to leave...

It's hard. I feel guilty.

[Jacob] get away from the van.

[Screeching] get away from the van.

I'll let you go, but you can't chase her.

Whilst mom was gone, dad and I were keeping

An eye on the boys.

Hey!

[Jake] hey!

Ian and grant fight a lot,

And it's really annoying when they scream.

They're usually all right.

I usually go inside if they're playing out here.

Don't hit!

It would be one thing if the boys were playing,

But they weren't. They were being really rough,

And jacob just walks away and ignores it. Quit.

[Crying]

[Horn honks]

[Jo] when erin got back,

She went to put grant down for a nap...

Okay, we're done.

And when she turned the computer off, he just lost it.

I have waited and waited.

[Screeching]

♪♪♪

If you get off your bed again, you have to go in to the...

At one stage, she takes him out

Outside the house into the conservatory area,

Where he was banging on the door to get in.

It's just spiraled out of control.

Coming up on...

Tonight's special is kicking and screaming.

[Screaming] [erin] hey!

It's all right.

So would you mind if I just kicked out in the living room? That'd be great.

And jo stays over to catch a bed thief.

I'’ve seen enough.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

I couldn't believe what I was seeing--

For her to shoo grant into the foyer like some pet.

[Banging]

Quit acting like an animal.

Because this behavior really needs to change.

Later that evening, mom was trying to gather the boys

Before they went out to dinner.

[Grant screams] he's not doing anything to you.

Come on. Go.

He just can't listen to mum.

Are you the disciplinarian in the family,

Or does dad share that as well with you?

No, I'm not the disciplinarian.

I get mad 'cause I have to tell him to discipline 'em,

And by that time, they could care less.

He's more quiet.

And now I have to go find

The little one out in the bushes.

Grant, come on!

No. Come back up to the house.

No wonder mom feels like she's doing the discipline.

I haven't seen jacob have words at all.

[Crying]

I shouldn't have to carry you up here. [Screeches]

That's how he always talks to you?

He's got that [imitates screeching] noise.

[Erin] yeah, all the time.

♪♪♪

The harmony family eat out often,

So it was a great opportunity for me to be able to see

How jacob and erin handle the children

When they're out in public.

When we do go out to eat, it's ridiculous.

It's very embarrassing taking them out in public.

[Screeches]

[Erin] honey, I don't want you to get hurt with it.

[Screeching] [erin] okay, you're open.

It's all right.

Eating out with the harmony family

Is absolutely atrocious.

Both parents are embarrassed throughout the whole event.

The children rant and rave. They're up from the chairs

And the table and misbehaving constantly.

Grant.

Give me!

When we go to a restaurant, it's crazy, and it's loud.

[Screeches]

My thought when we go out to eat

Is just hurry up and get it over with.

[Erin] not tonight.

Okay, that's enough.

There's no way that erin and jacob

Could have possibly enjoyed

Spending time in that restaurant.

♪♪♪

[Jo] I know you're having a lot of trouble

With grant getting out of bed.

Basically, grant comes in here,

Pushes me out of the way, so I just go in there

So I can get some sleep.

Oh, really?

A -year-old kicking dad out onto the couch?

This one I had to see.

So you don't mind if I just kind of... Sure.

Kicked out in the living room there and put my feet up

And just make myself comfortable there? That'd be great.

♪♪♪

[Crying]

At : in the morning,

I heard the pitter-patter

Of footsteps, and out came grant,

Who pitter-pattered into his parents' bedroom.

Why on earth didn't mom and dad say anything to grant?

And then dad came out.

Poor old dad, reduced to the couch.

Hardly seems fair, does it

It's madness.

This certainly isn't any good for mom and dad's relationship.

The kids have just taken over.

We're gonna make some big changes around here.

[Whispers] I think I've seen enough.

You have a lovely, cozy home,

And you do have three very intelligent, lively lads.

But...

You guys are pushovers.

Why?

I think we've just gotten to the point

Where we have given up.

How good does it feel when your baby boy

Runs down that driveway-- "mommy, don't go! Don't go!

"I need you! I need you."

I just feel guilty...

Leaving him if he wants to be with me.

Every time you validate his need to want to be with you--

When you stop the car-- one more cuddle, one more kiss--

The message you give is that you don't trust

His own father to be with him.

How does that make you feel?

I think I've gotten used to it.

Discipline--

Where did that word go?

Because it doesn't exist in this house.

Jacob, why do you say nothing to your children?

Why do you sit back and just observe what's happening

Without supporting erin?

Guess I don't have an answer. I...

I really...

I don't know.

What is going on

When you can allow grant

To hit, to spit

And to treat the pair of you like doormats?

When we give in, then he'll be quiet.

And then we can have some peace, probably, after that.

When grant was outside banging in that conservatory area,

That was not peace and quiet, was it?

No. Not unless I wasn't hearing him.

Clear-cut--

You guys don't take ownership of your own authority

In this house as parents.

Your children do.

Let's talk about bedtimes.

What on earth is going on with bedtimes?

The kids are out of control.

We'd like to know.

Of course grant is getting up in the middle of the night.

Because he's guaranteed he can kick you out of bed, jacob.

And he can snuggle up to mommy and have her all to himself.

And at the cost of what in your relationship?

We don't get to spend hardly any time together.

How sad is that?

Pretty sad and pretty frustrating.

Even though it was hurtful, I knew it was the truth.

And maybe that's what needed to be said

To bring out the issues.

She did call us a "pushover."

And...

I guess I can't argue with her.

We're gonna start taking some control back here.

I'm ready.

Put the balance back into the harmony household

So we can have some harmony.

Some harmony would be good.

Let's start, then.

?coming up on...

[Grant grunts]

Mommy wants you to get down from the counter now.

Grant's waving his magic wand.

Just hurts my feelings when he does that to me.

But jo stops him from getting his wish.

You do not hit mommy.

When "supernanny" returns."

But first, a tip from supernanny.

Parents, if you're leaving your toddlers

In the care of others, sneaking out

And not telling them will only make them anxious.

Instead, make sure that you reassure them

With confidence that you'll be back soon.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good ♪

When I arrived back at the harmonys' household,

I saw them all outside playing football,

So I joined in and had some fun.

What are you guys doing to her?

[Erin] look, daddy's got the football now, ian.

[Jo] the whole family were having fun,

And then ian decided to hog the ball.

[Ian screams]

Throw it to daddy.

Who are you gonna throw it to? [Jacob] ian, here.

Erin, jacob, come here, please, quickly.

Any nonsense, you go straight in with saying to them,

"Look, stop that behavior."

If they carry on with it, you place them, okay,

Outside the game.

Ian, if you can't play with the family,

Then you're gonna have to sit out.

Warning, please. No back talk.

No back talk, ian.

You're gonna have to sit out if you do.

Okay.

He was given a warning. He didn't listen,

And dad had to place him into a naughty spot outside.

Come down to his level. Why is he here?

You're here because you talked bad to daddy.

"Do not talk to me like that."

That's what I want to hear from you. Come on!

Do not talk to me like that, ian.

"Now you stay there"... Now you stay there.

"And think about what you've done."

And think about what you've done.

Move away. Move away.

Ian pushed the boundaries. He got up.

He refused to sit in the spot.

[Jo] and look authoritative. Head up, jacob! Mmm.

You sit on your naughty spot.

Dad had to consistently

Go back and place him onto the spot.

It went on for a really, really long time,

Until it was time to go inside the house,

And then we had to place the naughty spot

Inside the home.

As soon as we placed ian on the naughty spot,

Grant would play up.

[Screeches]

Grant, mommy wants you to get down

From the counter now.

Grant hit her,

But she completely ignored the behavior

As if nothing happened.

Why are you allowing that? Take this from his hand.

Place that away. You do not hit mommy.

What is going on here? It just hurts my feelings when he does that to me.

Get tough.

Right now, there is no room for tears.

Those kids need to realize

They cannot hit you in the face and treat you that way.

Let's go.

Let's go.

We ended up having two children

On the naughty spot after hitting both parents. [Crying]

Let him sit here. After three minutes, you'll come get him.

[Crying][crying]

[Erin] I was ready to... Call it quit,

But jo would come up periodically

And put a little buzz in our ear...

[Crying]

You need to sit on the naughty spot.

I don't wanna.

[Jo] erin and jacob, they didn't give up.

They carried on, they were consistent,

And they got the results that they wanted. [Erin] say "sorry, mommy."

[Erin] give me a hug.

[Jacob] say that you're sorry, ian.

Okay.

[Jacob] it was exciting seeing him get to that breaking point,

Taking that good step towards taking control

Of all the situations.

[Jo] what we are going to address

Is grant's anxiety when you leave...

And if we're to be honest,

Your anxiety, too, as well, okay? [Giggles] mm-hmm.

If grant had his way, mom would never leave the house.

So I'm gonna show them the separation technique.

Okay, first step--

You've made up your mind you're running an errand.

Get yourself ready.

The second step-- to confidently come up to him

And tell him that you're running an errand

And you'll be back in minutes. Okay.

Third, leave...

And the fourth, to engage him

In something else to keep him focused.

Okay. Sounds good.

Is that good? I'm ready.

All right. So...

Let's do that now. Let's set it up.

Okay. I'm gonna...

Okay. Okay.

[Erin] I didn't think it was gonna work at all.

We tried things. It didn't matter what it was.

He was still wanting to come with me somehow,

But I was willing to try anything.

Okay. Grant?

Yeah? Mommy is gonna run an errand,

And I'll be back in minutes, okay?

Hug and kiss.

Bye. See you when you get back. Okay.

[Jo] dad stepped up by making sure that grant

Was occupied with something else.

Perfect. [Jacob] I was happy because

I didn't have to hold him down and to fight with him.

He's not runnin' down the road.

Thank you guys for bein' good.

[Jo] first time mom tried the separation technique,

Absolutely perfect. It was so great to see.

Grant didn't do the -meter dash,

And mom just drove on into the sunset.

Coming up on...

It's a pajama party at the harmonys'...

[Crying]

Next time he comes back, just say nothing.

And mom tries to catch a break...

Who does homework? [Erin] mom.

[Jacob] dad. Mom. There you go. Bag of--

Oh, it's dropped. Better put it up.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

[Jo] the parenting roles

And the responsibilities in this house

Are really out of balance.

So I wanted to show erin and jacob

How unbalanced they were.

One tray for you, erin...

Thank you.

And one tray for you, okay?

Let's go shopping.

Who goes to work every day?

Both of us. Yep.

Yeah? Okay. You both have to work.

Who makes the effort in disciplining the children?

I'd say a little bit of both.

Yeah? Okay. One bag of discipline.

One bag of discipline. All right. Okay.

Who does bedtime?

[Erin] mom. Mom. Okay, bag of bedtime.

Who does dinnertime?

Mom. Mom. Bag of dinner.

[Erin] I loved how she was getting to the point

In a very creative way.

Who does homework?

[Jacob] dad. [Erin] mom.

Mom. There you go. Bag of--

Oh, it's dropped. Better put it up.

Who does bath time? [Erin] mom.

Mom, and who gets the kids dressed?

Mom. Mom, with one hand...

Like that-- like we started off.

Okay. So we'll stay like that for--

How many? What, , hours.

That's pretty good. Yeah? For erin and jacob...

It's about compromise, it's about give and take,

And at the moment, that's not happening. I'm already sweating.

See where we go with this? Mm-hmm.

Yeah. [Jo] jacob needs to be more involved with the family,

And erin's got to trust jacob with these responsibilities.

I mean, she shouldn't have to do it all.

The trading task technique.

Start to compromise.

Will you bunk the children tonight

Or will I do homework tonight?

It sounds like a good idea.

When you step back, you come forth.

It was the first time

In a long time that we actually communicated

On who's gonna do what. Who's doing bath time tonight?

I'll do it. Okay.

Who's going to get the children dressed

Into their pajamas tonight?

Who's gonna do dinner? [Jacob] I'll do dinner.

All right.

Bedtime? I'd rather do bedtime.

Okay, I'll clean the house.

That looks better.jacob?

It's fine with me. It will be interesting to see

How the pair of them

Juggle their tasks throughout the week and who takes on what.

Teaching jacob and erin how to get control of their family

Inside the house is one thing,

But some of these children's worst behavior

Has been outside the house. So I'm going

To teach mom and dad the dining out technique.

We can't always assume the restaurants we go to

Are going to have kid's things to do.

So always make sure that you're prepared

To have something to occupy the children

Whilst they're waiting for their food.

I had mom fill a backpack with all kinds of toys for the kids

So that they won't get bored and play up at dinnertime.

Don't forget your backpack.

It was important before mom and dad sit down

That they set up clear expectations for the boys.

I want you guys to sit at the table.

I want you guys to use your manners.

And I want you guys to keep your voices down.

[Grunts]

[Jo] you see that grunting noise? [Grunts]

Any nonsense like that when we're in that restaurant,

You'll be given a warning, and if you both carry on,

You'll be outside in the car, full stop.

So let's go eat in the restaurant

And let's have fun and enjoy ourselves, okay?

There's no seagulls in there.

[Whispers] grant, you need to keep your voice down.

[Scoffs]

And the next time he does that,

What I want you to do is to give him a warning.

So you're not saying "you need to keep your voice down."

"I want you--"

It's the voice you're projecting, but it's a low tone.

[Erin] I like the idea that jo gave us

To let the boys pack things that they want to do.

I think it was a good idea.

So how was your day, hon? It was good. It was good.

[Jo] for the first time,

Both erin and jacob and the boys

Had a really lovely meal together.

Whereas before, it really wasn't enjoyable.

It was like "hurry up and eat. We gotta go,

"Because we don't want something to happen."

Mommy and daddy are very happy.

I want you to be like this all the time. [Erin] right.

It wasn't as crazy as usual.

Oh, mommy and daddy are so happy. Here, grant.

[Jo] so when we got home from dinner,

It was time to get ian and grant off to bed.

Tonight, I would like dad to get grant dressed.

I persuaded erin to let jacob do bedtime tonight

Because it will be great to show erin

That he's capable of pulling it off.

Let's read the book.

"Pooh's best day."

Turn the page.

I knew jacob was in the bedroom reading the boys a story,

And they were in their beds, and it was quiet,

It was goin' great. It almost made me really nervous.

What are you nervous about? That it's gonna spiral out of hand.

But he's gotta learn to be able to do that,

And it will free you up as well

To do things that you can do for yourself.

In other words, put the martyr crown down. [Laughs]

She helped me and made me relax and let it go,

And, I mean, it just showed me that

Jacob is perfectly capable, and he was doing a great job.

Good night, ian. [Jo] it's one thing

To teach the parents the stay in bed technique

When you're placing your child to bed,

But it's another doing it in the middle of the night.

So I thought it was important to make sure I stayed around.

[Crying]

[Jo] grant went to hop in bed with mom,

But she was right on board with the techniques,

And she took him straight back to his bedroom.

[Crying]

I'll see you in the morning.

Okay, next time he comes back, just say no.

Okay. Okay? You're doing very, very well, all right?

[Screeching]

[Whispering] mom has done absolutely fantastic tonight.

Grant came out twice,

And she confidently guided him back into his bed

Where's he's finally settled himself and gone off to sleep.

[Erin] I was pleasantly surprised that i...

I only had to take grant back two times.

I only went to the second step,

Um, and he did stay for the rest of the night.

[Jo] it was time for me to leave.

So I snuck out to let the family get some sleep.

Coming up on...

Hey, hon.

Dad's energy sputters to a halt...

I would like for him to try this much instead of this much.

She left. But grant's still running on all cylinders.

[Crying]

When "supernanny" returns,

♪ Be good, be good ♪ but first, a tip from supernanny.

Parents, children sometimes think

That they can't be disciplined outside,

But a naughty spot could be here...

Here...

Or here.

As long as you have it up here,

A naughty spot could be anywhere.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

♪ Be good, be good ♪

If you guys are bad in the restaurant,

Whoever's bad has to go out to the car.

[Laughs]

[Jo] come on, dad. What kind of an explanation is that?

[Erin] come here. Let's replay.

Mommy expects you guys to sit at the table,

Use your manners, okay, and listen to mommy and daddy.

[Jo] that's right, mom. Set those expectations.

Which picture are you gonna color?

This one.

[Erin] man, you guys are coloring so nice. I like it.

[Jo] great job there. You're keeping the boys

Busy with their toys.

A peaceful dinner. Fantastic.

You guys are coloring so nice. I like it.

Mommy has to run an errand,

And I'll be back in minutes.

[Jo] wow, let's just see how grant takes this news.

[Crying] I want a hug.

He wants a hug.

[Jo] it's too late for hugs now. You need to engage him.

She left. [Jo] don't hold him, dad.

Time for him to do an activity.

Look, papa's gettin' the motorcycle out.

No, no, no.

[Crying] mama!

[Jo] oh, boy. Back to square one.

[Crying]

[Jo] uh-oh. The boys are starting to act up.

Daddy! Daddy!

[Crying] daddy.

Ian is crying.

[Jo] are you going to do something, dad?

[Crying] [jo] this is ridiculous.

Jacob, what's it gonna take to get you to react?

[Screeching]

If you keep yelling,

You'll get yourself on the naughty spot.

[Screams]

[Jo] good job, dad.

Steppin' it up with discipline.

Sit right over here. No.

[Jo] jacob, stick with it.

Hey, hon. [Screaming]

[Jo] jacob is fine to ask for some help,

But what about some discussion?

I feel like he's trying a little bit,

And I would like for him to try this much instead of this much.

[Screaming]

I need you to tell mommy you're sorry.

Sorry.

I'm feeling frustrated,

And I know jacob probably feels the same way.

[Jo] you guys need to be talking. I'm heading back.

So are you guys ready to take a look at this footage?

Yeah. Okay.

[Erin] come here. Let's replay.

That's fine.

Mommy expects you guys to sit at the table...

Use your manners,

Nice to share, grant. Thank you.

Congratulations.

That's great. How did it feel, jacob?

We weren't embarrassed. It was a nice, quiet dinner.

It was very successful. Well done to the pair of you.

Thanks. Great to see.

[Screeching]

[Crying]

Hey, hon. [Crying]

I'm gonna tell you what I see.

There's no communication between the pair of you.

If you're doing it together, you're in it together.

You've got to talk.

You've gotta say where you're at so the other one can take over.

That's hard when things are crazy like that

To communicate well.

So how were you both left feeling?

Even though it may have gotten done...angry.

It just felt like... [Sighs] well, it got done,

But we didn't feel good about it. Exactly.

[Grant] I want a hug.

He wants a hug.

[Grant crying]

She left.

[Crying]

That part upset me when he said "he wants a hug."

It made me feel guilty, but I knew I already gave him one.

So I was upset that he brought that up.

Yeah, but you shouldn't have left that way. We should have

Got him doin' an activity, and then you should have left.

Jacob, that's your responsibility.

You're meant to be here supporting erin.

I just think that I should have been allowed more time.

Life is not like that sometimes.

At the drop of a hat, a phone call happens

And you've gotta sh**t about.

You've gotta be able to think on the hop

There and then.

[Crying]

[Crying]

Did you see what the boys were doing?

Why didn't you address this with them?

Why didn't you even give the children a warning?

I mean, I guess I didn't know what to do.

You turned a blind eye. You ignored it.

Yeah, I'll admit i-i did ignore it.

See and say something.

React all the time.

Erin and I missed a lot of things

That we need to work on.

So you ready for some more work

So we can start improving this?

We're ready. Let's move forward, yeah?

Yeah.yeah.

Okay.

Coming up on...

Come on. Jo's got an exercise

That makes dad sweat. "Dad, look!

Look! He's pushing me!" "He's pushing me!"

Say something! Come on, say something! You're making me sweat.

When "supernanny" returns.

♪ Be good, be good ♪

Jacob can be very delayed

With his reactions to what he sees.

It is important that he learns

To nip bad behavior in the bud.

And so I introduced the I see, I say technique.

I want you to see...

And then say something.

This is about you giving a quick response

So that you react to the children's behavior.

Which proved to be...

Very challenging for dad.

Brushing teeth. Give me your response.

If you see your kids hugging, what are you gonna say?

[Pauses] thank you guys for being so nice to each other.

Too late.

Thank you, guys, for brushing your teeth.

Please don't yell, you guys.

I don't like that. Come on.

Dad tried well. I mean, he did,

But there was still quite a big gap

Between what he saw and what he said.

Your kids are shouting. "You get off me!

"You stop that! You stop that! Stop that!

"Don't hit me! Oh, my god, dad, look!

"Look! He's pushing me! He's pushing me!" Say something.

Say something! Come on, say something!

I'd say, "quit yellin', guys,

"Or you're gonna sit on the naughty spot."

[Bell dings] okay, that's better.

It was embarrassing.

You don't fight. Why?

'Cause if you do, I'm gonna put you on the naughty spot.

I think it did help, though.

"I'm years old. Why?"

Daddy doesn't like that, and it's inappropriate.

Why? Because you're bein' bad.

Don't ask me why anymore.

[Laughs]

You're making me sweat.

I do need to react faster to the situation.

I just need to practice, and I'll get it down.

Give me five. You've got it, okay?

Remember, I see, I say.

That's exactly what you need to be doing -.

And I think he's realizing

That he needs to be able to push himself as a father

In order to be able to project

What he wants to with his own children.

All right, this is what we're gonna do--

Separation technique. Okay.

On the dvd footage, I saw that dad failed

To do the last step of the separation technique.

I want you to get your stuff ready.

So on the hop,

I literally told mom, "you're going."

Okay. Okay. All right? Let's go.

Okay. Be back.

Grant, mommy's gonna run an errand,

And I'll be back in minutes.

Mom, and, i-- there's a horsey on there.

[Jacob] today, erin left... Hey, guys.

I'll be back shortly. Let's get the horsey up.

Gave me about a two second notice,

So I took grant...

Let's build a barn.

And we played horses...

Pick out the horses, grant.

And he was fine with that. It worked out great.

[Erin] I felt pretty confident leavin'.

I didn't really feel any guilt.

I didn't stop, I didn't look back,

I just went on, and so I felt good this time.

Jacob's starting to take a bigger role in the house,

And part of that is spending more time with the boys.

So I set them up with a game. Grant, it's your turn first.

So as soon as you see a light, I want you to hit it.

And after you hit it, ian, it will be your turn.

But suddenly, ian started to get an attitude.

[Jo] yet again, dad just sat there

While ian started to hit him, and he did nothing.

Dad, are we ignoring that?

Are we?

So if I came and just punched you in the side of the head,

Would that be all right, or between the legs?

Ian, you do not hit daddy.

If you do again, you're gonna sit on the naughty spot.

[Jo] off he goes.

Come straight down to his level. Give him eye contact. Ian...

Low tone authoritative voice, dad.

You're on the naughty spot because you hit dad.

Good-bye.

Let's have fun with grant. Grant's been a very good boy.

Dad, have you got eyes in the back of your head?

It's your play,

And you show him discipline.

Address the situation now.

Do not hit me.

Dad did really well.

He kept putting ian back onto the naughty spot,

And he remained consistent. [Jacob] just leave that one up, grant.

I did feel confident that I was gonna handle ian

Beyond the naughty spot, and I followed through with it.

It actually worked out really good.

Jacob still needs a little bit more encouragement

When it comes to discipline, but he's come a long way,

And I definitely think he's starting to get the hang of it.

You don't talk to daddy like that.

I want an apology.

Sorry.

Come here.

[Jacob] that is a good book.

[Jo] jacob and erin have definitely learned

They need to take ownership of the roles

That they play in this household and with their children.

I think that jacob's learned throughout this process

That he needs to start speaking up...

Night-night, sweet dreams. A little kiss.

And these little boys need to do as they're told now,

And they know it.

Sweet dreams.

My work is done here.

So make sure you continue to communicate.

[Erin] before jo came, I was just constantly

Upset, nervous, frustrated,

And things just seem so much more relaxed.

You take care. You, too.

Take care of yourself. All right? Give me a hug.

It's been a really fun experience

Working with the harmony family.

They've learned a lot, and I think to be able

To work with this family and educate them

In a way that it's gonna make a huge difference

Has been very fulfilling and rewarding for me.

[Erin] thankfully we were blessed enough

To have jo come into our home

And turn everything around for the better.

Jacob and I and the kids--

I've just seen such a tremendous difference.

Wait, it's ian's turn. [Grant] here.

[Jacob] I think now

We have more quality time with the kids.

He rides a horse?

I'm really enjoying the kids a lot more now.

I definitely feel that jacob has grown through all this.

I'’m proud of you, honey.

I'm proud of the things that I've seen.

My brothers have changed

With not yelling and fighting as much. Go!

Our family is more playful. [Giggles]

[Jacob] I really didn't think

That things would change that fast, but jo came

And laid down the techniques,

And it was amazing that it works so well.

I got it, dad. [Laughs]

[Erin] no words could express

The things that jacob and I have for her

For just taking the time to come and help a family

Just get back to happiness.

Thank you, jo jo.

How about playing weights? No, no.

Come here.

No, i...