01x25 - The Amazing Harry Hoo

[bunniefuu]

[ plates shatter ]

- [ g*nsh*t ]
- [ woman screams]

[ Clicks ]

[ theme music playing ]

But, chief, I'm telling
you 99 had no right
to sh**t at me.

She could have
hit me.


Drawing your g*n on
that kaos agent.

- But, chief--
- it was your job
to follow that man

Not to apprehend him.
It's a good thing I had 99
and 56 there to back you up.

- I'm sorry
I had to do it, max.
- That's all right, 9--


Backing me up too?

Yes, max, and 56 is still
following that kaos agent.

That agent is our only lead
to their number-one man,

The man in charge of kaos's
data smuggling operation.

Your man was number three.
He would lead us to number two.

And number two would
lead us to number one.

How long have we been
following those agents?

Since number 118.



My gosh, chief,
that seems like an awful
waste of time to me.

Why didn't we just start off
with number one?

Max, this chain

Is part of a massive
smuggling operation

To get the formula
of the tk-800 out
of the country.

- The tk-800?
- Right.

The tk-800-- chief,
if they ever get the tk-800
out of the country

- We're in a lot of trouble.
- Uh-huh.

- There's only one thing
that bothers me.
- What?

What is the tk-800?

It's the formula for
the tranquilizer b*mb.

We think number three
is carrying the formula
to a higher-up.

- What about the map, chief?
- What map?

This chart represents
the movements

Of all the kaos agents
from 118 to number three.

We thought if we could
figure out a pattern
to their movements

We might be able to deduce
where their headquarters is.

- [ Phone ringing ]
- that may be 56 reporting in.

Hello?

Oh yes, 56,
where are you?

Oh, I see.
Has he made contact?

Well, hang on to him.
I'm sending 86 and 99
to take over.

He followed number three
to the airport.

You two will pick him up there.
Max, are you listening?

Huh?
Oh, yes, chief.

I'm just trying to figure
something out.

You see, the position
of all these kaos agents
can be explained.

- All except one.
- Which one is that?

Now what's this guy doing
up here in manitoba?

He was holding
the map up.

[ woman speaking over p.a. ]

- 56?
- Yes, 86.

- Where's our subject?
- He made contact

With another man
wearing a loud
sports shirt.

They went into
the men's lounge
about a minute ago.

All right, 56.

When they come out, you stay
with the number-three man.


Follow the new one.

Max, here they come.

Wait a minute, 99.

- There's something
strange about that man.
- What?

He's not wearing
a loud sports shirt.

the number-three man
was wearing the loud
sports shirt.

For some reason or other
they exchanged shirts.

- Come on
- right.

There you are, sir.
Your flight for san francisco

Is leaving at gate nine.
I think you can
just make it.

Yes, sir?

- Two tickets to
san francisco please.
- Mm-hmm.

- First class or tourist?
- Tourist.

- Dinner flight
or snack flight?
- Dinner.

- Single plan or family plan?
- Single.

Will that be cash
or advanced billing?

- Cash, and please hurry.
- last call for flight 72
to san francisco.

- Round trip or one way?
- Round trip.

And when will you
be returning?

What difference
does it make?

It may not matter
to you but it certainly
matters to us.

Look, why don't you
make it any time it's
convenient for the airline?

Good,
I'll leave that open.

Max, we're gonna
miss that plane.

That'll be $609.42.

Oh, by the way,
the movie

That you'll be seeing
is "brunch in acapulco."

- "Brunch in acapulco"?
- Yes, starring george brennan,
joan bennett

With edward g. Robinson
and lynn bari in
supporting roles.

Oh, and joan blondell
and cab calloway make
cameo appearances.

- Does that take
place in mexico?
- Yes, it does.

- I saw it, 99.
- Max, the plane.

Please, 99, I'm telling
you I saw the picture
and it was a b*mb.

Even joan blondell
couldn't save it.
What else have you got?

On the flight to seattle
connecting to san francisco

We have a real winner--
"the return of the cisco kid."

"The return of the cisco kid"!
Now that was a great one, 99.

Tell me, does gilbert roland
play the cisco kid?

- Max!
- Let me see.

No no no, he doesn't.

Raul hernandez plays
the cisco kid.

Uh-oh, I'm sorry.
[ Chuckles ]

Raul hernandez
is your pilot.

Don't you have anything
with cary grant in it?

- Let me see.
- Max, come on!

Very good.

It appears, bobo,
that our old adver--

Our old adversary
maxwell smart

Has fallen
into our trap.

He does not realize
that he is walking
into great danger.

It is true, master.

I never fly
if I can avoid it.

No, you misunderstand
me, bobo.

Mr. Smart follows
number two, ling how,

Hoping to be led to me.

But what he does not know
is that death awaits him

At the end of his odyssey.

Now here are your orders.
It is very simple.

Go to the tremont hotel.

When ling how arrives,
k*ll him.get the shirt

And leave this half
laundry ticket on his body.

Now do you have that, bobo?

Yes, master.
Just give me
the last part again.

- Which part?
- The part after
"it's very simple."

Oh, bobo.

[ Door creaks ]

Interesting.

He was k*lled and then
put into the closet.

Moment, please.

Suppose m*rder*d man

Was k*lled
while hanging up coat.

- Who's that?
- That's hoo.

- Who's who?
- He's hoo.

Oh, he's who.
What are you
talking about?

Oh, mr. Smart,
this is the famous
hawaiian detective,

Now serving
with the san francisco
police force,

Inspector harry hoo.

Oh, he's hoo.

Hi, hoo.

It certainly is nice
to meet you, inspector hoo.

I've heard so much
about your work.

You are too kind,
mr. Smart.

Humble master detective
is honored to help you

In unusual case.

Uh, what bothers me about
this case, inspector hoo,

Is the motive
for the m*rder.

Oh, correction, please.

This is not case
of m*rder, mr. Smart.

This case of robbery.

Robbery?

That's amazing.

But how can you say
it's robbery, mr. Hoo?

I mean, the man
was found dead
with $100 in his wallet.

Humble beg pardon,
mr. Smart.

Suppose victim's wallet
originally contain

$101.

By george,
you're right.

Of course, then they
took the dollar

And left the $100
to throw us off the track.

You are apt pupil,
mr. Smart.

Yes, of course.
Then they m*rder*d him

So we wouldn't find out
about the robbery.

It is wisely written,
mr. Smart,

"Dead men tell no tales."

Mr. Smart,

You are man
of some perception.

What do you notice
about man on floor?

He's not breathing.

Which present two
possibility, mr. Smart.

One: man has gone

To visit honorable
ancestor.

Or?

Man very good
at holding breath.

Do you not notice anything

Else unusual, mr. Smart?

No, I don't think so,
mr. Hoo.

Your eyes see,
mr. Smart,

But they do not
observe.

I don't think
I follow you, mr. Hoo.

Observe closely,
mr. Smart.

m*rder*d man dressed
in business suit.

Gray jacket and pants,

Black socks and shoes,

Striped necktie,

Silver tie clasp.

Hmm, looks pretty good.

Then why,
I ask you, mr. Smart,

Why is he not
wearing shirt?

By golly, you don't
miss a trick, do you?

You know, a lot of people
wouldn't have noticed
that little detail.

That is why it is wisely
written, mr. Smart,

"Bird in hand

Gather no moss."

Ah so.

Is it a clue, hoo?

It is evidence left
by m*rder*r, mr. Smart,

- It's a button.
- Which present
two possibility.

One: victim tore button

From m*rder*r jacket
during struggle.

Or?

It is button
from my jacket

Sleeve.

Right.

Tell me, mr. Hoo,

Do all hawaiian detectives
wear white suits?

No, I began
to wear white suit

In hawaii
when I was employee

Of ice cream firm.

Well, they're very
attractive.

[ Chuckles ]
you should see
my cleaning bills.

Tell me, mr. Smart,

How you think
m*rder was committed.

Two possibilities.

One:

He was k*lled
by a .22-caliber p*stol
at long range

By a short man who was
a stranger to him.

Or?

He was k*lled at close range
by a knife

Used by a woman he knew

Who was over six feet tall.

Amazing.

Ah so.

You found something,
mr. Hoo?

Perhaps, mr. Smart.

Notice please, ashtray
contain two cigarettes.

I see.

Then that means that there
was someone here in the room

With the victim
when he was k*lled.

Perhaps even
the m*rder*r.

Moment please.

Moment please?

Once again
worthy control agent

Leap
to obvious conclusion.

If victim
were non-smoker

Could have been
two smokers in room
with him.

Well, that's true.

Perhaps two smokers
and one non-smoker.

Moment please.

Moment please?

Perhaps there were
two smokers

And two non-smokers.

Perhaps two smokers

And four non-smokers.

Then what
you're saying, mr. Hoo,

Is that there could have
been as many 50 people

In this room with the victim
when he was k*lled.

Providing only two
of them were smokers.

Exactly.

Boy, it must have been
pretty crowded in here.

- Max.
- Oh, 99.

I talked
to all of the other
occupants on the floor

And they heard
no strange noises,

Just the usual running
and sh**ting and screaming.

Oh.
Oh, 99,

I'd like you to meet
mr. Hoo, the famous
hawaiian detective.

- Hello.
- Charmed.

Haven't we met before
in hawaii?

Do you like ice cream?

- No.
- Then I don't think
we've met.


Check in with control

- And tell them what's
been happening here.
- Right, max.

We're gonna remove
the body, sir.

Uh, moment please.

Much can be learned
from man

By what he carry
on person.

Please to examine

Pockets, mr. Smart.

Wallet...

Handkerchief...

Comb...

Keys to my apartment.

One moment, mr. Smart.

Victim had key

To your apartment
in his pocket?

Oh.

You want me
to search his pockets.

Well, there's nothing
in his pocket

But this half
of a laundry ticket.

Ah so.laundry ticket
tell us something.

Present two possibilities.

One: either victim
was trying to locate

Man with other half
of laundry ticket,

- or--
- moment please.

You mind if I try other
half of possibilities?

Please to do so.

Or...

Victim only took half

His laundry
to the cleaners.

Amazing.

Has w*apon been cleared
for prints?

There were no prints, sir.
The m*rder*r must have
worn gloves.

Oh, thank you.
You may take body now.

Mr. Smart, it would
be most instructive

If we reconstruct crime.

Will you assist me,
please?

I'd be most happy to,
mr. Hoo.

Judging from angle
of wound

Victim was standing
quite close to assailant.

- Like so.
- Like this.

I suspect m*rder*r
was holding knife
up his sleeve.

Like this.

When m*rder*r was
ready to strike

- He merely slid out knife...
- Like this.

- Pulled victim close
to him with free arm...
- Like this.

Seized the knife
and plunged it home.

Like this!

Sorry about that.

Amazing.

Max, are you sure
this is the right one?

All chinese laundries
look alike to me.

Please, 99,

The address was right on
the back of the laundry ticket
we found on the body.

I'm no harry hoo,

But give me some credit
for some intelligence.

Where is harry hoo?

I think he got
a little irritated
when I tore his coat.

I guess he went
home to change.

Hmm, that's funny, 99.

What's so funny about shirts
in a chinese laundry?

Well, these laundry marks.

I've never seen such
a complicated series

Of numbers
on a man's shirt.

- You don't suppose...
- What, max?

So, it's our old friend
the craw.

Not the craw.
The claw!

- Bobo, take their weapons.
- One move and I fire.

Mr. Smart, what use
would your flashlight
be against this?

At least I can see
who's k*lling me.

It's in her purse.

The claw:
thank you, mr. Smart.

Well, how do you
like this, 99?

The craw, one of the great
master criminals of all time

Working in
a chinese laundry.

No, mr. Smart.

Operating a chain
of chinese laundries
across the nation

Where kaos agents
receive and pass on
stolen information.

A complete spy network.

The spy network
is just a front.

The real money
is in the laundry.

The less he knows
the better.

Of course, max.
The formula

For the tranquilizer b*mb
is in the laundry mark.

Exactly.
Where no immigration
officer would ever look.

This way, mr. Smart.

This laundry is the end
of our pipeline.

And now, mr. Smart,
you will tell me

Which of my men is known
to your organization.

Like the careless ling how,
he must be eliminated.

You're wasting your time, craw.
You'll never get anything
out of me.

I think our most fitting
means of persuasion

Is close at hand.
Bobo, the pressing machine.

Show him how
it works, bobo.

Do you have
anything to say?

No starch, please.

Bobo, you may now
press mr. Smart's head.

Hoo:
moment please.

Oh, it is you, hoo.

We meet again,
mr. Craw.

Claw, not craw!
Claw!

Well, I see you two
know each other.

Have followed trail
of this man for many years.

Have complete file on him

Lacking in only one item.

What item is that?

Complete set
of fingerprints.

How did you know
we were here?

Called your hotel
and got no answer.

How did you know
to look for us here
in the chinese laundry?

Was not looking
for you.

Always bring
my shirts here.

Amazing.

So you see, mr. Hoo,
that's how they did it.

Five different kaos agents
each carrying a shirt

From a kaos laundry
near the pentagon.

And each shirt containing
a part of the formula.

In that way none of
the kaos agent could go
into business for himself.

If you don't mind, 99,

- I'd like to tell
this in my own way.
- Right, max.

You see, mr. Hoo,
in that way

None of the kaos agents
could go into business
for himself.

Anyway, the terminal
was always here at
the craw's laundry.

From here the data
would go overseas.

But tell me, mr. Hoo,
how did you know this was more
than just a simple m*rder?

Ah, it is truly written,

"Eyes of mind never sleep."

Your honorable servant
observe two things

That were most suggestive.

Two possibilities, eh?

What were they, mr. Hoo?

First, porcelain cat

Was missing from usual
spot on mantelpiece.

Second, gardener

Had trimmed magnolias.

Of course.
The porcelain cat.

It's all so simple.

What porcelain cat?

So sorry,
that was another case.

In that one
gardener did it.

Don't suppose there was
gardener in this case?

No.

Well, anyway, mr. Hoo,

You came just
in the nick of time.

The craw was about
to subject me to this.

Ah yes, chinese
steam-press t*rture.

Fiendish but effective.

Ah!

Allow me to offer
old oriental saying--

[ Speaks foreign language ]

Uh, what does that mean?

Sorry about that.

[ theme music playing ]