09x03 - Rude, Red, and Royal

[bunniefuu]

Calm down into depths of no.

In.

And you? Me? I'm ready.

Uh. Are we sure we should do this?

Well, the Red King helped Alex. We aren't. Alex.

You're the Red King. Yeah. How dare you? There is no king.

I am the Red Prince. Why? I never

coming to someone's castle without even knowing

who they are. And on my birthday.

Happy birthday, Your Majesty.

Happy birthday, Your Majesty.

Yes, yes, a joyous occasion. Thank you very much.

Red Prince. The king wasn't nearly as rude or small or loud.

Well, if it hadn't been for your kind.

The king would still be here.

Happy birthday, Your Majesty. Happy birthday, happy birthday. I guess.

How do you know such privilege information?

You must be infiltrated here to steal my crown.

You literally just told us. Also, we

saw advertisements for your party everywhere.

And you are in the presence of royalty.

And that's me. Thank you very much.

The heir to the Crimson Castle.

Oh, did I used to be this unbearably pompous?

Your Majesty, we have brought you a magnificent

gift befitting of the royal birthday.

It is very rare. The w*apon of

the greatest warrior to ever live.

Acquired by us and only us, with no help at all.

But we're the ones who gave it to you. No help at all.

Hey.

A green. Why is it green?

Oh.

How could you.. Forgive us, Your Majesty?

We didn't know it was green. We are stupid.

Take them away. Your Majesty, please. Your Majesty, please

wait. They gave it to us. It was there for me.

No, wait. Well, maybe we can help cheer you up.

And beheading people does cheer me up, but go on.

We heard you like to play games.

So what exactly do you desire from

me in exchange for playing my game? There's always a catch.

Your Majesty. You are as wise as you are.

Small.

Thank you. Yes. If we win,

our only request is that you help us get to the tree.

The tree. It's so far away. That's why we're asking.

Hmm hmm hmm hmm. If you win,

I will help you with what you ask.

Oh, great. So how do we play?

One. Each player may move every pawn, one space, each turn.

A rule to. Whoever gets the most

pawns to the other side of the board wins.

Rule three. It's a takeover, a space.

You must dispose of whoever occupies it. Dispose of.

Okay, I think I'm missing some pieces.

Hmm. How perfect that you brought along friends to play, then.

Twice. Blake. Now we're all littles. We're okay. Rubies.

The most important thing is winning this game. What's wrong with them?

I don't know. They look stupid. Uh.

I guess these are our teammates. No

one's going to get hurt, right?

As I am a gracious ruler. The white team may go first. Begin.

Uh. Can you advance one space forward, please?

Yeah.

Oh.

Victory for me.

Okay, how about you three?

Oh. Weiss, do you think you can take that

space? Have some.

Oh. Go waste.

Beginner's luck doesn't bother me.

So tell me. Why do you want to go to the tree?

We want to go home. And we believe the tree can get us there.

Yang! You're up. All over it.

And how do you know this?

Well, it worked for someone we know. Blake. Your turn.

I'm sure of that, though.

Someone you know. Hey, hey, what about us? What do you

want us to do, huh?

Hey! It's my turn. att*ck! Full steam ahead!

No. This is not..

How it's supposed to go. This isn't right.

This isn't fair. You. You.

Wait. What type of creatures did you say you are again?

Well, uh, Blake is a Faunus. Belittles a mouse.

At least I think. Sure. And the rest of us are human. Who?

Human. Human. I knew it. You must have changed it.

All of you! Get them! Get them!

You gonna go with the swords up high and your g*ns down low?

Have you gone for the action? Come for the sport.

It's still bloody. It's a free.

Leave them alone.

You're going to hurt them. It's my royal birthday,

and I can do whatever I like. It's almost been moving fast.

Yeah.

I've won. Give up already?

We won't.

Jesus, King of caster.

Oh.

If you won't concede, then. Have you beheaded? You can..

Throw a tantrum if you want, but..

We won't. Doors to the trees. Arts there.

Oh. You must be so distraught.

Unable to do the one thing you were put on this acre to do.

I understand. Surely you don't want to behead them.

They are but fragile things without a head.

If you get angry and break them, they might not ever come.

It's my.. Birthday and they wouldn't let..

Me, I know. Your Majesty. It truly isn't fair.

You must play your game and win at any cost.

It must hurt your heart. Let me help.

No. Fine. I won't behead them.

I never want to see them again.

Yeah.

Yeah. What about.. My friends?

They're so tiny. And he promised..

He. Witnesses are like birds. They taste great, but always escape.

You should go before he changes his mind.

Maybe he. Don't touch me. Come quickly.

You're fantastic. Majesty. On.

Go go go go. Yeah. This is the way out.

I don't know how that went so wrong.

But thank you for saving us.

Good thing I dropped by the Prince's

party when I did. I usually hate parties.

How did you end up in his game, anyway?

We wanted to speak to the Red King, but he wasn't there.

And now we're back where we started. The King.

How do you know him?

Well, times change, you know, and so do we when

it's our time to change, don't you?

Did you hear that? There was a Red King.

Right? But something's changed since then. Great.

So we're not in the stupid story

after all. We're in it. Stupid sequel.

First things first. What are you want?

Did you need to talk to the King about?

And what is your favorite dessert?

Oh. What? Again, we're humans. And I must say,

you're not nearly as interesting as the others

I've met. What about. Hold that thought.

What's the deal with this cat? Can't

anyone here be normal? That's not just any cat.

When Alex was lost, she met the curious cat..

Who loved to ask.. Questions.

And the curious cat helped Alex find the tree.

Wait, so the cat is our ticket out of here?

Rubes. Don't let that cat get away. Cat! Wait, cat! Oh, goodness.

No! Need a nap?

Go! Run! Rick.

Fix.