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10x03 - The Gardeners of Eden

Posted: 01/11/24 16:08
by bunniefuu
Welcome to the BBC Home Service.

This week, my guest on Memory Lane
Melodies is Mrs Octavia Eden,

who I would describe as the
Pablo Picasso of flower arranging.

Would you, darling?

That's so sweet of you.

Owner of a chain of flower shops.

You could call it a "daisy chain"!

HE LAUGHS

And, er... And a mainstay of
the London social scene,

so it came as a surprise this week
when she announced

that she was moving to the sleepy
English village of Kembleford.

And, well, the question
we all must be asking is - why?

Well, I suppose it gives my life
a certain symmetry.

I was born in Kembleford,
and now I'm going to die there.

HE LAUGHS

Well, hopefully that won't be
for some time to come!

Oh, no, darling.
The doctors have told me

there's nothing they can do for me.

I should be around
for St Swithin's Day,

but I probably won't make
Michaelmas.

HE EXHALES

Mind that Ming vase, please!

That's travelled


And be very careful with
that violin.

It was a gift from Yehudi Menuhin.

Do you not think
she's doing too much?

Yes, I do.

But who's going to tell her?

MRS DEVINE: Oh, Father,
she's so magnificent!

She's done the flowers
for three royal weddings.

And she had a tulip named after her.

I understand
she's written an autobiography.

Oh, yes! Thank you for reminding me.

Ooh!

I bought a copy of it,
and, oh, what a life she's had.

I'd love to get her to sign it,
but she does seem awfully busy.

Well, I think that
can be arranged!

SHE GASPS

Who's it for?

Um...

Isabel Devine.

And I'm Father Brown.

Octavia Eden.

Hello, everyone.

Oh, it's so sweet
to be back in Kembleford.

Now she's bringing out her clothes.

Why does she need so many hats?
She's only got one head.

Well, I suppose,
as a very successful woman,

she must get asked to open
lots of things.

Shops and hospitals.

She's going to need
plenty of hats for all of that.

Apparently she's turning
the manor into a flower school.

Oh, we'll have giggling schoolgirls
from morning till night.

I think it's really nice that she's
bringing some life to the place.

We had some happy times there.

So, now you add a few stems
of Sweet William.

This one.

BRENDA SIGHS

Mm-hm. Mm-hm.

Oh! No, careful you don't
obscure the alstroemeria.

Why would I ever want to do this?

Well, supposing you were invited
for dinner

and you wanted to bring
a nice bouquet.

I live next door to a graveyard!

Perhaps Miss Palmer does not have
any sympathy for arranged flowers.

Each to their own.

Oh, well.

Mrs Eden has invited us round to her
Music and Movement class tomorrow,

including you, Father Brown. Really?
Mm-hm.

I thought with her illness,
she'd be much frailer,

but she does seem
in very fine fettle.

CHIMING

SMASH!

Mother, are you all right?

Still in one piece.

Unlike my porcelain collection.

Auntie?! Oh, Noele.

I'm glad you're here. We really must
discuss this business of my legacy.

Well, surely as your only daughter,
I... You will be well provided for,

but who will inherit
the family firm, hmm?

Who will ensure that 40 years
of hard graft

don't end up on the compost heap?

So...

..I've set you a series of tests.
Oh, yes?

Number one,
I'm having a little party.

I want to meet the neighbours,

and I want you to make the drinks.

Now, they must consist entirely
of botanical ingredients.

You know, jasmine gin, or wild
flower whisky, that sort of thing.

And whoever creates the most
delectable selection is the winner.

But I don't even drink alcohol.

And Lizzy knows all about herbs
and botanical ingredients.

Then, you'll need to work
ten times harder.

Now, Music and Movement. Mm-hm.

Oh, this is awfully jolly!

Yeah, if you like
that sort of thing. Hello.

Morning!

Father Brown, I'm so glad you came.

I didn't want you to feel left out.
Thank you.

Although I don't think
I'll be limbering up.

You could always work
the gramophone.

NOELE SNEEZES Oh, bless you!

That's that hay fever back again.
Yes.

Are you taking those pills?

Now, do be careful because
this was a present from Daddy.

I will take the utmost care.

Mrs Mulch!

OCTAVIA CHUCKLES
What a surprise!

Yes, I hope you don't mind,
but I used to live here,

and I was curious to see the garden.

Perfect timing.

Please, do join us.

There you go.

All right, everybody. Morning!

Now, find a space where you can
all stretch out.

Excellent.

And then take a deep breath...
SHE INHALES DEEPLY

Music, please. Music.
JAUNTY MUSIC PLAYS

Thank you. And follow me.

And up, and round.

And up, and round...

Marjorie!

MUSIC STOPS

What were you thinking?!

I was only dancing. Come on!

Mrs Mulch!

You have a mind of your own.

You're more than welcome
to stay with us.

I'm so sorry about your gramophone.

Well, YOU didn't smash it.

Oh, well, we'll just have to proceed
without music.

Darling, don't let it upset you.

We've got all these guests
to entertain

and we've got a party to organise.

Now, come on.

All right, let's try again.

Now, get ready.

Arms outstretched, and...

And I'm so looking forward to being
part of your charming community.

Now, do help yourself
to liquid refreshments.

And please tell me
which ones you prefer.

CHATTER

Apparently, Father, this one
is rum infused with rhubarb.

Ooh.

I can taste the rhubarb.

And is that a hint
of hibiscus flower?

Gosh! You have an awfully good
palate.

It's hibiscus sabdariffa, from my
very own herb garden in London.

Inspector! Will you try one of these
interesting concoctions?

INSPECTOR SULLIVAN: Well,
probably best not.

Oh, come on, you're not on duty!

Oh, sadly I always appear to be
on duty, but do tell me about them.

Now, dear, this one is vodka,
flavoured with orange blossom.

BRENDA: Mm!

Oh, erm...

It kind of tastes like pond water.

I'm inclined to agree.

And get rid of these blooms.

They're way past their best.

Sorry.

NOELE SNEEZES

God bless you.

Thank you.

Mrs Mulch! Oh, Father.

I'm so sorry about
my husband's behaviour.

There's no need to apologise.

John just doesn't like change. Mm.

But now he's made a fuss,
and got it out of his system,

I'm sure things will improve.

Oh, Mr Mulch! Are you all right?

John? Why, Marjorie...?

Why...?

CROWD GASPS

In nomine Patris,
et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti.

Amen.

On this occasion,

I think we can both agree
on the simple truth, Father.

I have searched for the truth my
whole life, and it is never simple.

Well, it appears he was poisoned,

and as we both saw him arrive,
it must've happened at home.

I prefer to reserve
my judgment on that.

Father, his last words condemn her.

Mrs Mulch? Yes?

Would you accompany me
to the station?

First thing this morning,
I gave him his porridge.

Made with water and a pinch of salt.

Did he seem unwell at this point?

He was grumbling
about not having slept,

and a terrible pain in his guts,
but that's not unusual.

Yes, would it be fair to say
your husband had a temper on him?

Oh...

He was just sad.

Life passing him by.

All of his dreams...

..slipping away.

But he really wasn't a bad man.

I understand he dragged you home
from the manor the other day,

causing that bruise.

He could sometimes be a little firm,

but I never fought back.

He's my husband.

He WAS your husband.

Do you know of anyone who gave him
anything to eat or drink recently?

Oh... Not that I know of.

Then, I'm afraid
you leave me no choice.

Marjorie Mulch, I am arresting you

on suspicion of the m*rder
of John Mulch.

You are not obliged to say anything,

but anything you say
may be given in evidence.

Mrs Mulch.

How are you bearing up?

Oh...

I feel like I'm in a bad dream,
Father.

I'm sorry to have to ask you this...

..are you responsible
for the death of your husband?

No!

Although I have been tempted,
down the years.

John could start an argument
in an empty room.

Have there been any recent
altercations?

Well, there was something.

I thought I'd imagined it, but...

..I woke up in the middle
of the night last night.

And I thought I heard voices...

..outside.

It sounded like John
arguing with a woman.

Did you hear any of the words
that were spoken?

No.

It was just a blur.

But I did hear a sneeze.

Sorry.

That's not very useful, is it? No.

On the contrary,
that is most useful.

I can assure you, Marjorie, that
I will find out who is responsible

for your husband's death,
and you will walk out of here,

with your head held high.

FOOTSTEPS APPROACH

Here you are, Mother.

Oh, thank you, darling.

Please don't.

Don't what?

Stare at me as if I'm about to die.

I actually feel quite well today.

I'm sorry,
it's just seeing that poor man.

I know he wasn't
the nicest of people...

Oh, Noele. We were just talking
about Mr Mulch's death,

and it's given me an idea
for your second task.

I want you both to create a wreath.

Poor Mrs Mulch won't be able
to arrange anything.

Splendid. I'll get onto it.

You're using a man's death
for your competition?

Darling, there are two types
of florist in this world.

Ruthless, money-grabbing mercenaries

and unsuccessful ones.

You need to work out
which camp you're in.

KNOCK ON DOOR Who is it?

Oh, Father Brown.

Good afternoon.

I thought I'd pay you a visit,
see how you all are,

after the unfortunate ending
to your garden party.

Yes, well, we're all still reeling.

Of course.

You must surely have known Mr Mulch,

from Kembleford all those years ago.

I, you know... I can't say
I DO remember him.

It was such a long time ago.

And, well, it seems
like another world.

Looking back... Oh!

Father Brown, my mother is not well

and I don't think she's ready
to receive guests.

Miss Schama? May we talk?

Oh, darling.

How long have you lived
with your aunt?



She asked me to move in
when my mother died,

and I've never looked back.

So, it must be a great shock
to see her so unwell.

It is.

In my line of work, I'm always
arranging flowers for funerals.

And it's only just hit me
that, one day,

I'll have to make a wreath for...

Everyone is so fond of her.

Except the late Mr Mulch.

We barely knew him.

And yet, in the middle
of last night...

..I think you went round to see him.

Someone heard you sneezing.

I was in bed, when I heard a noise.

Someone moving through the house,
creeping about downstairs.

I came down to the dining room,

and someone had opened up
Auntie Octavia's bureau.

What did you do?

I looked outside, and there he was -
heading across the garden.

So I followed him to his house,

and told him never to
darken our door again.

Why did you not call the police?

My aunt is very fragile.

She doesn't need any unnecessary
stress at the moment.

Goodness! I'm surprised
there are so many people.

Probably come to check
he's really dead.

Marjorie, you have my condolences.
Thank you.

Thank you for the flowers.

They're so beautiful.
You're welcome.

Well, I think she has
good reason to be grateful.

Your wreath is quite magnificent.

All the airy tracery of the
willow herb is just sublime.

Thank you. And, Noele, yours,
so stark,

with the wheat, and the teasel,
and the deep purple hellebore.

On reflection, I think...

..I think yours says more
about the man himself.

He was very prickly.

So you're the winner.

Congratulations. Thank you.

Now, I have some errands to attend
to, so I'll see you both later.

How strange.

Miss Palmer? Yeah?

Follow that florist.

SERGEANT GOODFELLOW CLEARS THROAT

Oh!

OK.

I know I'm holding a hammer,

but I didn't smash that window.

Right. Who did, then?

Don't tell me.

Dame Nellie Melba was passing by
and fancied a sing-song.

No. It was her! Mrs Eden!

She had a hammer in her handbag.

Well, where is she now, then?

I don't know. I...

Er...

Well...

..she must've scarpered!

Right.

Well, Miss Palmer, I think
it's time for you to scarper,

right down to the police station.

Father Brown, as a man of God,

you have a remarkable gift
of leading people astray.

I apologise, Chief Inspector.

I peremptorily told Miss Palmer
to follow someone.

I had no idea she would follow
them onto private property.

We're sorry for wasting
your precious time,

and, if you were to release her,

I won't let her out of my sight,
I promise.

Well, you're in luck, Mrs Devine,
as we're rather short of cells.

Follow me.

Any news on cause of death?

Yes, there is, Father.

Mr Mulch died of aconite poisoning.

Aconite? Mm. It's a botanical toxin.

Unusual thing for Mrs Mulch
to have in her possession.

On the contrary, it's easily
extracted from wolfsbane,

a plant which grows all over
the Cotswolds,

including Mrs Mulch's back garden.

Sergeant, see me in my office.

And as a result, Father,
she's just been charged with m*rder.

APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS

Oh, you're back.

How was the funeral?

It was fine...

..but people were surprised
when you walked out before it began.

Oh, I'm sorry, but it's difficult
going to funerals.

Oh, Mother. If I could swap
with you, I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Well, you can't,
so don't go on about it.

And it's time for your final task.

I want you to organise a wake.

Whose? Mine.

I think the idea is...

One doesn't get to go
to one's own wake.

I want an evening
that's all about me,

with flowers and flamboyance,
music and magic.

You can have one half of the
ballroom, and you the other.

And whoever wins...

..wins everything.

I'm telling you, she had a hammer!

A hammer in her handbag?!

Florists frequently use hammers to
pulverise the stems of their blooms.

Oh, I stand corrected.

Mrs Eden is going to be reading
her book later,

at the Kembleford Ladies Society.
Then, you must go along,

and try find out why she left
Kembleford all those years ago.

And what will you be up to?
Burglary.

There is no way I'm going back
in there again.

No. I need you to stand guard.

Oh.

What are you after?

Whatever Mrs Eden was after.

"That my path through life has been
lined with bluebells and buddleia.

"I hold my head up high
and kiss the rain."

Thank you, everyone.

And now Mrs Eden will be happy
to answer any questions.

Any, any relevant questions,
that is, about the book.

Hello. Yes?

I was so moved by the passage
in chapter one,

where you describe walking through
the streets of London,

lost and alone,

until a little buttercup,
poking through the pavement,

inspires you to carry on. Thank you.

Yes, I was quite pleased with that.

But, erm,
why exactly were you so sad?

Oh, it was the usual.

I came to London, full of dreams,

and discovered that the streets
really weren't paved with gold.

So there wasn't something
more specific?

No. So, if there are no further
questions. Thank you.

It's just, erm, you were having a
very happy time of it in Kembleford

at the beginning of the chapter,
and suddenly you're so full of woe.

Yes, because I had my heart broken!

I was eaten up, chewed up,
and spat out!

Thank you, everyone.

And now my mother will be signing
copies in the vestibule.

Every single drawer has been rifled.

Well, did you find anything?

No. Ah.

But I expect Mrs Eden did.

What are those doing there?

Erm, they're rose petals.

Probably fell off a rose bush.

No roses grow in this garden.

So, how did they get here?

Mrs Eden.

Oh, Father Brown.

I still thank God I can get down
on my knees to plant things.

But sometimes I need human help
to get up again.

Oh!

Thank you.

Lizzy doesn't like me gardening.

She thinks I should lie down
in a darkened room,

but I think it's vital.

"A society grows great
when old men plant trees

"whose shade they know
they shall never sit in."

I agree.

And it's important
to hand on knowledge. Mm-hm.

May I have a word?

Of course. Take a pew.

You know...

..when I was a girl,

I used to walk past this place
on my way to school.

It seemed like a fairy-tale castle.

And sitting here now,

I almost expect I'll wake up, seven
years old, my mother calling me.

And if you did wake up as a child,

would you live your life
differently? Oh, no.

No, I'd make the same mistakes
again,

but with even more relish.

What about John Mulch?

Was he a mistake?

I assume you were lovers.

Goodness!

For a man who must renounce
worldly pleasures,

you're surprisingly worldly-wise.

And your answer?

Yes.

I loved him more than life itself.

We were together for six months,

but then he met Marjorie,
whose father owned the manor.

Well, frankly, he married the house,

until he realised
it was rather high maintenance.

And that was why
you left Kembleford? Yes.

Because I couldn't stop crying
from morning till night.

And at least in London, the noise
was drowned out by the traffic.

This morning, you broke
into John Mulch's house.

What were you searching for?

Oh, I don't know
what I was looking for.

A love letter. Some...
Some record...

..of the feelings he might've had.

What did you find? Nothing.

His childhood diary was
full of cricket scores.

His heart must've been made of ice.

He caused you immense pain.

Did you ever wish to take revenge
on him? Oh, yes!

For 30 years, I thought
of burning this place down.

Destroying John,
and the thing he loved most.

But then I realised...

..whilst he was struggling
to pay heating bills,

I had become a rather wealthy woman.

Really...

..you couldn't ask
for sweeter revenge.

Mrs Eden and Mr Mulch?

I don't want to think about that!

Then don't, Miss Palmer.

But I wonder, did Mrs Mulch
know about their relationship?

Oh! You know that rose petal
that you gave me?

Did you find a match?

No, but I did find...

..this book,
with pictures of flowers in it.

That belongs to Mrs Eden!

Mrs Eden's daughter.

I've seen her consulting this.

Well, it doesn't belong to you.

I'll return it forthwith,

but first, there's
a little trick with a book.

If you let it fall open naturally,

it will show you which page has been
most frequently used.

SHE GASPS Poisonous plants.

Hmm.

Well, yes.

I'm always consulting
the poison section.

When you scour the hedgerows,
as I do,

you need to know if the plant
you're picking is poisonous.

Oh. I see.

Though many plants are toxic
if taken to excess.

Caffeine, curare...

..even aspirin.

These things can cure us,
or k*ll us.

So, it would be fair to say
that you keep poisonous substances

in your medicine chest? Some.

Colchium autumnale.

Autumn crocus.

Now, this is a very effective cure
for gout.

But if you double the dose,
you k*ll both the gout

and the person suffering from it.

Aconitum napellus, that's another
plant toxin, isn't it?

Yes. I think I have some of that
somewhere. Er...

Half-empty.

This is the poison
that finished off Mr Mulch.

I didn't like the man,
but he would've been very suspicious

if I'd offered him something
to eat or drink.

We weren't exactly
the best of chums.

Could anyone else have borrowed
your apothecary kit?

No.

No, this is for my use only.

Mimosa.

I must have mimosa.

SHE SIGHS

Noele, what are you doing?

I'm recreating the bouquet
Auntie Octavia had at her wedding.

I was going to do that! Oh, well.

Now you won't have to bother.

This is ridiculous!

Mother is dying, and she's got us
running round in circles,

playing these silly games.

Well, you could always just...

..drop out.

If I do win control of the business,

I'd find a position for you...

..somewhere.

How did you become so cold
and hard and unfeeling?

I learned a while ago that a thing
has to be firm to survive.

I remember when you came
to live with us.

Oh, you were the most beautiful
woman I had ever seen.

You were just like Mother.

And that meant I could be me.

I'm glad that worked out for you.

Noele? Yes?

What would happen
if we refused to compete,

and joined forces to give Mother
the best party of her life?

She could disown us.

Would that be so bad?

To work together...

..and be friends again?

Father!

Have you found out who did this?
Not yet.

Mrs Mulch...

..your husband's past
came back to haunt him.

Many years ago, he had
a relationship with Octavia Eden.

Mrs Eden?

Did you know there was someone else
before you?

Yes.

I knew there was someone.

But John could never talk
about his feelings.

Then, one day,
I found a note in his study.

What did it say?

It was a long time ago, but...

..I remember every word.

"I've lost the baby.

"Now I'll be out of your life
forever.

"Merry Christmas."

Merry Christmas? Yes.

Well, thank you, everyone,
for coming.

Er...

Some time ago, my doctors told me
I had a growth.

This surprised me,
as it wasn't the growing season.

LAUGHTER

Naturally, I have made arrangements,

and my family have been arranging
my funeral.

Now, I didn't want to miss that,

so I asked for a sneak preview.

Lizzy, Noele,
this is quite wonderful!

Now, I don't want any sadness
or frowns,

I just want you all
to enjoy the champagne!

Cheers! Cheers!

APPLAUSE

I hear you've been to see
Mrs Mulch again, Father. Yes.

I have.

As much as I would love her
to be innocent,

her husband was poisoned, and she is
the only person who made his meals.

This is exquisite!

My very first shop.

Oh!

Who's responsible for what?

Well, Mother,
I hope you won't be too cross,

but we hated having to be at w*r.

We decided to make peace,
and we did all of this together.

Oh, darlings!

That's just what I wanted you to do.
What?

You've been fighting for so long now

and I don't know whether
it's jealousy

or fear of what might happen
when I'm gone,

but you're better as a pair,
you need each other.

Oh, I think I need to sit down.

Could you fetch me a chair?

Oh!

Ow!

Well, that serves you right!

What is the name of Mrs Eden's book?
A Rose Amongst The Thorns.

Yes.

Yes!

Miss Schama...

..might I have a private word?

Erm, yes, Father, this way.

Please, I can't be too long.

Auntie Octavia's very ill.

You've been very loyal.

Helping her return to her roots.

A happy homecoming.

Apart from the appearance
of one man.

John Mulch.

A very disagreeable character.

And yet, he was once her lover.

And, I believe,
the father of her first child.



saying she'd lost a baby.

And, in ways, she had.

She entrusted the care of
the newborn to her sister.

And as it was Christmas...

..they called the little girl Noele.

I believe your mother loves you
very much.

But your father,

John Mulch...

..was a man with
very little love in him.

He broke into the house and
went through your mother's things.

What was he looking for?

He was furious at Mrs Eden's return.

Did he want to find something
that damaged her?

He got more than he bargained for.

What did he find?

Her diary?

Your birth certificate?

Either way, he found out the truth.

And so did you.

I chased after him.

There must be some mistake!

You can't be my father...

It's news to me too.

You were supposed to have died
at birth.

I wish you had.

He was an astonishingly cruel man.

Not the sort to die
peacefully in his bed.

At first I wondered,
how was it done?

What did he eat?

But, of course, the best way
to poison someone

is through the bloodstream.

You gathered a bunch of roses
for John Mulch...

..dipping the thorns in poison.

If he had accepted your gift
graciously,

he would still be alive.
I've got something for you.

But he rejected it...

Get away from me.
..angrily, no doubt.

Please! JOHN SCREAMS

They smell so beautiful. You pressed
the bouquet into his hands,

and his fate was sealed.

Do you think I care?

Do you think he ever gave
a second thought for me?

I do not believe that you could ever
have made peace with him.

But you must make peace with God.

DOOR OPENS

Noele, Mother needs to see you.

Oh, there you are!

I was worried about you.

Hello, Mother.

You know.

I know everything.

Oh, darling.

I never meant to hurt you.

I wish it could've been different.

I wish the world would've
allowed us to be together.

But you were always my daughter.

I'm so proud of you.

Both of you.

Now, be good to each other.

I love you.

I want you both to have
a wonderful life.

Think of me, as the garden grows.

As you grow.

Ego facultate mihi ab
Apostolica Sede tributa.

Please! Be gentle with her.

Oh, darling. No need to worry.

I'm a tough old thing.

I'm not.

I don't know how I'll cope
without you and Mother.

Just remember.

We're both...

..cuttings...

..from the finest, strongest tree
in the whole forest.

LIZZY CRIES

ENGINE STARTS

CAR DRIVES AWAY

Oh, I hope she likes sweet Williams.

I'm sure she will.

Oh, hello! What's this?

It's just to say, erm,
welcome to freedom.

Oh, thank you!

I thought I'd never see
another flower again.

Hello, there, Mrs Mulch.

It's so nice to see you.

Oh, and you.

Oh! I've got you a present for you.

Oh?

For finding the truth.

I only hope that people
will understand

why my sister was driven to it.

I know what this is!

This is a Tulipa Octavia,

named after your mother. Indeed.

I'm going to send one of those
to everyone who knew her.

GREENWICH TIME SIGNAL BEEPS

This week, on Memory Lane Melodies,
some sad news.

The celebrated flower arranger
Octavia Eden has passed away.

Last time she appeared
on the programme,

I asked why she had devoted
her life to flowers.

She said, "Because flowers ARE life.

"Dirt is thrown at them,

"water falls on them,

"and still they rise,
beautiful and defiant,

"with colours
to dazzle your dreams."

CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS