03x24 - Gotcha
Posted: 12/19/23 09:32
- I'm not at all sure about this, Webster.
I mean, do you really think you can hit it with a dart?
- Which dart?
I just wanted to see how silly you look
with a cantaloupe on your head.
[audience laughs]
♪ Set in my ways ♪
♪ losing track of the days ♪
♪ Only me to live for ♪
♪ Had no need to give more ♪
♪ Than I wanted to ♪
♪ Spending my time ♪
♪ just holding the line ♪
♪ Never getting caught up ♪
♪ Love was never brought up ♪
♪ It's not the thing to do ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
♪ You made me leap without taking a look ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
♪ You reeled me right in line, sinker, and hook ♪
♪ Never thought forever was the best I could do ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ and me and you ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ and me and you ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ and me and ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
[exciting music]
- So I said, Katherine,
it doesn't matter whether or not you need a new sofa,
when they are % off, you go to the sale.
We are gonna have a ball.
- You party animals here.
[audience laughs]
Oh, now I know what you're doing
forget it, I got the prize yesterday.
[audience laughs]
- Oh what, what was it?
- Babe Ruth.
- The candy bar?
- No, the baseball card.
- How old is this stuff?
- You shouldn't be eating this cereal anyway.
It's almost nothing but sugar.
- I know, that's the best part.
- The cereal I eat is % natural fiber,
and when it's gone,
I can even eat the box.
[audience laughs]
- Isn't it a great time of the year?
The weather, the little birdies, the flowers.
- Your birthday.
- Yes, my birthday, my birthday is coming.
- And before you even ask,
I don't know what mam got you.
- Jerry,
Jerry, old pal, old buddy.
Mind if I call you old pal, old buddy?
You're fairly close with Katherine, did she say.
- She didn't, and even if she had, I wouldn't.
- Well, I didn't want to resort to this,
but hey, you know.
Webby, I have two tickets
to the New York Nickerbockers starring,
are you ready?
Your favorite, Patrick Ewing.
[George giggles]
- Patrick Ewing.
Forget it George I won't talk.
- You wouldn't happen to have any tickets
to the Chicago Symphony in here, would you?
- I could arrange it.
- I gotcha.
Besides, I paid Katherine not to tell me.
- Every year you get me to tell you your birthday present.
And every year mam gets mad.
- I can't help, but I don't like surprises, okay.
- Can we go see the Knicks anyway?
- Well, if you play your cards right, we can.
[George giggles]
- Forget it George, my lips are nailed shut.
- Fine.
But remember, you owe me and you owe me big.
- For what?
- For what?
For last night when you told Katherine you ate your broccoli
and you put it in your napkin and threw it in a garbage can.
- Oh yeah.
- Oh, George, you're about to cross that thin line
between parenting and blackmail.
- Morning all, well, what do you think?
- Oh, it is the perfect sale ensemble.
- Thank you.
I wanted to wear something that said
I could pay full price,
but I wouldn't spit on a discount.
[audience laughs]
- mam.
Next time you buy Sugar Sweeties,
would you mind squeezing a box
and see if it feels like Pete Rose?
- I don't know what Pete Rose feels like,
anyway since he isn't here.
Could we talk toys?
Now, I asked you to put them away.
- I did, there's not one toy in my room.
- I know.
[audience laughs]
- Oh, darling,
I'm afraid I'll have to take the blame for that,
you see, I told him to put his toys in there
so he could air his room out.
- Thanks George.
I owe you one.
- You owe him two
or didn't you think I knew about the broccoli?
- George, you have gotta stop getting
him off the hook now come on.
- I'm not letting him off the hook.
I've, I've just been reflecting over the last three years.
You know, I,
I've been rather rough on that little guy
and I think it's time for me to start to lighten up a bit.
- And besides the ticket bribe didn't work.
[audience laughs]
- Sweetheart, do you, do you know what date it is today?
- It's the day before your birthday
and I'm still not telling you what you're getting.
- What makes you think I wanna know
what I'm getting for my birthday?
[Jerry and Katherine snicker]
- Ghost stories.
I love to scare myself silly.
- Webster.
- Don't do that.
- I'm sorry, listen,
Jerry and I are going out on some errands
and one of George's presents
is being delivered this afternoon.
- I don't wanna know what it is.
- No, no, no, it's okay.
It's gonna be wrapped.
Now this is what I want you to do.
I want you to promise me that if I'm not here,
you'll hide it before George can get his mits on it.
- That won't be easy,
he's got pretty fast mits.
- Honey now listen, I'll be your best friend.
Come on, please.
Will you do it?
- You got it.
- Thank you.
- mam.
How come George gets so crazy about his birthday present?
- I don't know.
How come there are so many brown M&Ms?
- Oh, I see what you mean.
[audience laughs]
Careful George I'm, I'm almost finished.
- Okay, well hurry my wrist are falling asleep here.
[doorbell rings]
I'll get it.
- Oh no, no, no, I'll get it.
[audience laughs]
[whimsical music]
Thank you.
[whimsical music]
[whimsical music]
[whimsical music]
There,
that will do till I find a better place.
[foreboding music]
George.
- What?
[audience laughs]
Who was it at the door?.
- The door.
Ah, the, wrong number.
[audience laughs]
- Why don't we do this a little later?
Tell you the truth.
I'm getting a little bored with this, what is this?
- I don't know, I thought you knew what it was.
- It doesn't make any difference.
The point is, we've had some quality time together.
[audience laughs]
- I'll go put it away
[audience laughs]
- Come to Papa.
Oh, I love it, I love it, I love it.
It's my little silk pajamas.
Oh!
- George.
- Web.
- [Katherine] Hi boys, I'm home.
- Don't worry, I'll cover for you.
- Hide it.
- George.
- Hi mam.
- George Papadopolis.
I'm so ashamed of you.
Oh, how could you?
- He didn't, I did.
I showed it to him and I'm sorry.
- Is that true?
[audience laughs]
- Well, I...
- Don't even try to cover for me, George.
She caught me red
-handed.
- Webster, I am so disappointed in you.
[sad music]
- [George] Katherine, you took his toys.
Don't you think you're,
you're being just a little too rough on him.
First grounding him and now, now his toys.
- I don't see much sense in confining a boy to his room
and then leaving him in there
with the entire content of Santa's workshop.
Besides George, you know, I expect you to back me on this.
I mean, we're, we're just gonna get nowhere
unless we present a united front.
[audience laughs]
- Well.
- Good.
We have to set Webster a good example
so that he can learn, agreed?
- Darling, I gotta talk to you.
Now, you might get mad at me for this.
Maybe you won't, maybe you will.
But just remember one thing, sweetheart,
I love you very much, okay?
- Okay, what?
- Webster didn't open that package, I did.
[Katherine laughs]
- Come on, George.
You gotta stop covering for him.
- I'm not covering for him, darling.
I'm telling you truth, honestly,
I, I opened that package.
If I'm lying, may I never eat another piece of baklava.
[audience laughs]
- Oh, nice try George.
You know, I've been thinking
that I haven't been tough enough on Webster.
- Haven't been tough enough.
- No.
- What would you like to do?
Cut his desserts.
- Good idea, George.
Oh boy, he'd really remember that one, yeah.
You know what I think what,
I'm gonna tell him that no more video arcade.
- Oh come on.
- He has to come home and do his homework
as he eats spinach and broccoli every single day this week,
he has to have his bath by :.
- But you're not nice.
[audience laughs]
- Come in.
- Hi, got a minute.
- Got the rest of my life, you grounded me remember?
- Oh honey, you're off the hook.
George just confessed.
- He did.
- I wasn't sure if he was telling the truth
until he said he'd never eat another piece of baklava again.
- Are you mad at him?
- You bet, I'm furious at him.
But he doesn't know that.
- What do you mean?
- Well, he still thinks that I don't believe him,
but I do, pretty sneaky huh?
- So sneaky, I don't get it.
- Oh come on honey, I want him to stew in his own juices.
- Oh, he thinks that you think that I don't know
that you know what really happened.
- Now you're talking.
- I'm talking, but I don't know what I'm saying.
- [Katherine] Honey it's simple.
I get mad at George
cause every year he spoils the birthday surprise, okay?
And he still thinks that I'm mad at you, got it?
- Let me get this straight, am I grounded or not?
- Of course you're not but we can't let George know that.
- Why not?
- Because it would spoil the big surprise
and this year, Webster, he's gonna get it.
[Webster squeaks]
[audience laughs]
- [George] Webby.
- ,
,
.
- Webb
- Yes.
- What are you doing?
- Counting beans, it's part of my punishment.
[audience laughs]
- My gallant little man.
- mam wants me to take inventory of all the food.
.
.
- It's terrible.
Well, I owe you one
and I'm gonna make it up to you, I promise.
- Well, there is one thing you could do.
- Raise your allowance.
- Its tempting
but what I really want is a promise.
- Name it.
- Promise that you'll never ask
about your birthday presents again.
- I'd rather have a root canal.
[audience laughs]
- Well, then it's back to the beans.
I lost count.
[audience moans and laughs]
,
,
.
- Okay, okay, okay, I promise.
I promise I'll never ask about my presents again.
- Good, cause I don't have to worry
about making mistakes like saying
your birthday present is upstairs.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
[audience laughs]
- No, you're not dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
We made a deal remember?
- That's relief.
Cause I was hoping I wouldn't let the cat out the closet.
I mean out of the bag.
I mean out of the bag in my closet.
You really know what I mean, don't you?
- Of course I know what you mean
and you have nothing to worry about,
as I said, it's over, this is the new me.
Well, I'm a little busy.
I'll see you later.
[audience laughs]
[audience laughs]
This isn't the top of the line tackle box.
[horns blowing]
- Surprise.
- What do you mean surprise?
- S
-U
-R
-P
-R
-I
-S
-E, surprise.
- Happy birthday, George.
- We knew you wouldn't last till tomorrow,
so we let you find your presents.
- It was mam's idea, pretty sneaky, huh?
- Well, we finally managed to surprise you.
- Yeah.
- Cassie and I gave you the electric yogurt maker.
It's in the green box.
- We gave you an electric yogurt maker for Christmas.
[audience laughs]
- And we loved it so much
we had to get you an identical one.
[audience laughs]
- George, this is the Swiss army knife, it's from me, see?
- Oh wow.
- And this one over here is from Jerry,
these are pre Colombian statues
that represent the God and Goddess of, get this, fertility.
- The God is for pepper and the Goddess is for salt.
And baby.
- And these
that you had your little baby brown eyes on, silk jammies.
[Webster wails]
[audience laughs]
- I can't believe this,
you took all the fun out of opening up the presents.
Katherine, what, why did you do that?
- Whoa.
- Because you said you hate surprises.
- Yeah, so that only left one thing to do,
♪ happy birthday to you ♪
♪ happy birthday to you ♪
♪ happy. ♪
- Birthday Dear Georgie.
Happy birthday to me.
- Good morning, George.
- Good morning George, that's it?
Oh, hi Cass.
- Oh, George, how do I get to Oak Brook?
- Oak Brook?
- Yes, I'm meeting a friend there for lunch.
- Oh, well you take the northbound on a drive
to the Eisenhower Expressway.
- Thank you.
- That's it, thank you?
- Oh, where are my manners?
Goodbye.
[audience laughs]
- Oh, come on Webster, we're gonna be late.
- Oh, great, where are we going?
- Oh, are we?
Oh, Webster and I are going shopping,
and then we're going to a matinee at the Goodman Theater.
- Oh and I'm not going?
- Well no, honey, you don't like going to the theater.
So I only got two tickets.
- Well, darling, today's, today's my birthday.
- I know.
Come on Webb, we're gonna be late.
- Oh, I get it.
You two are gonna go outside
and in a little while come back and surprise Georgie.
That's a good one.
- Now, correct me if I'm wrong,
but didn't we surprise you yesterday?
- Darling that wasn't my birthday?
- Yeah, but yesterday was when you wanted your presents.
- Champagne popped, wrapping tossed, birthday's over,
see you tonight.
- Yeah, but sweetheart.
- Have a nice day Georgie.
- Hey, George.
Boy do I have a great day planed for us?
- Really?
- I've got two tickets to the plumbing fixture
and tool show.
Then we're gonna slip over
and test drive the lawn tractors, come on.
- Oh, I just remembered my goodness sakes.
I've just, I have a previous engagement.
I'm terribly sorry, it sounds like fun.
- Oh, suit yourself pal
but you don't know what you are missing.
Have a nice day.
- Why does everybody keeps saying, have a nice day?
[whimsical music]
[doorbell rings]
[audience laughs]
It's open.
- Oh, thank heavens.
I thought nobody was home.
Is Katherine ready?
- Katherine?
No, she's gone out with Web for the day.
- She can't have,
she was supposed to take me to the airport.
- Where's your car?
- It's in the shop.
I mean, I had the mechanic drop me by here
because she said she'd take me.
- Well, she's forgotten.
She's forgotten a lot of things today.
- Oh, I'll never get a cab in time.
My plane leaves in less than an hour.
George,
I, I know that this is extremely pushy,
but I'm, I'm desperate.
Could you please give me a ride to the airport, huh?
- Fine.
I've got nothing else to do.
- Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
They are gonna put your bust
in the Good Guys Hall of Fame.
- Do you know that this is a very special day today?
- Oh, sure,
today is the first day of the rest of my vacation.
[whimsical music]
- [Announcer] Flight to Freeport
is now boarding at gate .
- Well,
there are Jerry, have a good time.
- Wait a minute, George.
I, I don't think I should be left alone.
- You're not alone, Jerry.
There's people in front of you.
- George, I've, I've never confided this in anyone before,
but I am, I am deathly afraid of flying.
- Take a train.
- To The Bahamas.
I mean, actually, once I'm in the air, I'm, I'm okay.
It's just the waiting in line that I can't stand.
The endless waiting with,
with nothing to think about except the absurdity of flight.
I mean, how do they keep that big thing up there?
[audience laughs]
- Okay, I'll stay with you.
- Oh, George, you know, I,
I've been looking to, forward to this vacation so much.
Getting a little sun, doing a little fishing.
- You fish?
- Did I say fishing?
- [Announcer] Jerry Silver,
please pick up the white courtesy telephone.
- Oh, George would you hold my place in line?
I'll, I'll be right back.
Here, here's my ticket.
See if you can give me an aisle seat.
- Next.
[audience laughs]
Smoking or non
-smoking, Sir.
- I, I don't know what he does.
See no, it's not, it's not for me.
It's for my friend, he'll be back in a minute.
- Immediate boarding, Sir.
- No, no, no, no.
- Have a nice flight.
- Surprise.
- You wanna go fishing?
- What's going on here?
- You're going on a vacation with mam
as your birthday present.
- Oh, but I checked Jerry's luggage already.
- Yeah, but my luggage, your clothes.
- Come on you guys,
come on, you have to catch a plane.
- This is wonderful but what about the champ?
- Yeah, I'm gonna be at Camp Parker.
- He's gonna be our only guest.
- He's a shoe in for camper of the week.
- Yeah, everything's taken care of
and boy did we get George the unsurprised.
- You sure did, you know, it's kind of fun to,
to be surprised like that.
Hey, goodbye champ.
Have a good time at Camp Parker.
- Okay.
- Goodbye sweetheart, I love you.
You be a good boy, you promise to.
- Do I have to?
- Yes you do.
Thanks for everything.
Goodbye, thank you, goodbye.
- Bye bye, goodbye, goodbye go.
Goodbye, goodbye.
- Bye bye.
- Yeah, yes.
[all laughing]
- So Bill, what do we do first?
Go to the ballgame, Circus, amusement park.
- Better than that,
I've got two tickets to the plumbing fixture and tool show.
[audience laughs]
- Mam, George, take me with you.
[upbeat music]
[audience clapping]
- Webster.
- Will be back.
- In a moment.
[Webster laughs]
[soothing music]
- Welcome home, Katherine and George.
It looks nice, Cassie.
Maybe we should taste it you know, see if it's okay.
- I think that we better close this box
before we drool ourselves to death.
- Boy oh boy, surprise, surprise.
You got a card from Katherine and George, Webster.
- Oh, great lemme see it.
- It says, they're having a wonderful time.
The fishing is good and the sun is beautiful.
- Oh, great lemme see it.
- Katherine got a tan and they've learned how to snorkel.
- Just read it to me, Bill.
- As a matter of fact, they're having such a good time.
They've decided to stay three more days.
[whimsical music]
- Three more days?
[audience laughs]
[audience clapping]
[upbeat music]
[upbeat music]
[upbeat music]
I mean, do you really think you can hit it with a dart?
- Which dart?
I just wanted to see how silly you look
with a cantaloupe on your head.
[audience laughs]
♪ Set in my ways ♪
♪ losing track of the days ♪
♪ Only me to live for ♪
♪ Had no need to give more ♪
♪ Than I wanted to ♪
♪ Spending my time ♪
♪ just holding the line ♪
♪ Never getting caught up ♪
♪ Love was never brought up ♪
♪ It's not the thing to do ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
♪ You made me leap without taking a look ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
♪ You reeled me right in line, sinker, and hook ♪
♪ Never thought forever was the best I could do ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ and me and you ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ and me and you ♪
♪ It was you ♪
♪ and me and ♪
♪ Then came you ♪
[exciting music]
- So I said, Katherine,
it doesn't matter whether or not you need a new sofa,
when they are % off, you go to the sale.
We are gonna have a ball.
- You party animals here.
[audience laughs]
Oh, now I know what you're doing
forget it, I got the prize yesterday.
[audience laughs]
- Oh what, what was it?
- Babe Ruth.
- The candy bar?
- No, the baseball card.
- How old is this stuff?
- You shouldn't be eating this cereal anyway.
It's almost nothing but sugar.
- I know, that's the best part.
- The cereal I eat is % natural fiber,
and when it's gone,
I can even eat the box.
[audience laughs]
- Isn't it a great time of the year?
The weather, the little birdies, the flowers.
- Your birthday.
- Yes, my birthday, my birthday is coming.
- And before you even ask,
I don't know what mam got you.
- Jerry,
Jerry, old pal, old buddy.
Mind if I call you old pal, old buddy?
You're fairly close with Katherine, did she say.
- She didn't, and even if she had, I wouldn't.
- Well, I didn't want to resort to this,
but hey, you know.
Webby, I have two tickets
to the New York Nickerbockers starring,
are you ready?
Your favorite, Patrick Ewing.
[George giggles]
- Patrick Ewing.
Forget it George I won't talk.
- You wouldn't happen to have any tickets
to the Chicago Symphony in here, would you?
- I could arrange it.
- I gotcha.
Besides, I paid Katherine not to tell me.
- Every year you get me to tell you your birthday present.
And every year mam gets mad.
- I can't help, but I don't like surprises, okay.
- Can we go see the Knicks anyway?
- Well, if you play your cards right, we can.
[George giggles]
- Forget it George, my lips are nailed shut.
- Fine.
But remember, you owe me and you owe me big.
- For what?
- For what?
For last night when you told Katherine you ate your broccoli
and you put it in your napkin and threw it in a garbage can.
- Oh yeah.
- Oh, George, you're about to cross that thin line
between parenting and blackmail.
- Morning all, well, what do you think?
- Oh, it is the perfect sale ensemble.
- Thank you.
I wanted to wear something that said
I could pay full price,
but I wouldn't spit on a discount.
[audience laughs]
- mam.
Next time you buy Sugar Sweeties,
would you mind squeezing a box
and see if it feels like Pete Rose?
- I don't know what Pete Rose feels like,
anyway since he isn't here.
Could we talk toys?
Now, I asked you to put them away.
- I did, there's not one toy in my room.
- I know.
[audience laughs]
- Oh, darling,
I'm afraid I'll have to take the blame for that,
you see, I told him to put his toys in there
so he could air his room out.
- Thanks George.
I owe you one.
- You owe him two
or didn't you think I knew about the broccoli?
- George, you have gotta stop getting
him off the hook now come on.
- I'm not letting him off the hook.
I've, I've just been reflecting over the last three years.
You know, I,
I've been rather rough on that little guy
and I think it's time for me to start to lighten up a bit.
- And besides the ticket bribe didn't work.
[audience laughs]
- Sweetheart, do you, do you know what date it is today?
- It's the day before your birthday
and I'm still not telling you what you're getting.
- What makes you think I wanna know
what I'm getting for my birthday?
[Jerry and Katherine snicker]
- Ghost stories.
I love to scare myself silly.
- Webster.
- Don't do that.
- I'm sorry, listen,
Jerry and I are going out on some errands
and one of George's presents
is being delivered this afternoon.
- I don't wanna know what it is.
- No, no, no, it's okay.
It's gonna be wrapped.
Now this is what I want you to do.
I want you to promise me that if I'm not here,
you'll hide it before George can get his mits on it.
- That won't be easy,
he's got pretty fast mits.
- Honey now listen, I'll be your best friend.
Come on, please.
Will you do it?
- You got it.
- Thank you.
- mam.
How come George gets so crazy about his birthday present?
- I don't know.
How come there are so many brown M&Ms?
- Oh, I see what you mean.
[audience laughs]
Careful George I'm, I'm almost finished.
- Okay, well hurry my wrist are falling asleep here.
[doorbell rings]
I'll get it.
- Oh no, no, no, I'll get it.
[audience laughs]
[whimsical music]
Thank you.
[whimsical music]
[whimsical music]
[whimsical music]
There,
that will do till I find a better place.
[foreboding music]
George.
- What?
[audience laughs]
Who was it at the door?.
- The door.
Ah, the, wrong number.
[audience laughs]
- Why don't we do this a little later?
Tell you the truth.
I'm getting a little bored with this, what is this?
- I don't know, I thought you knew what it was.
- It doesn't make any difference.
The point is, we've had some quality time together.
[audience laughs]
- I'll go put it away
[audience laughs]
- Come to Papa.
Oh, I love it, I love it, I love it.
It's my little silk pajamas.
Oh!
- George.
- Web.
- [Katherine] Hi boys, I'm home.
- Don't worry, I'll cover for you.
- Hide it.
- George.
- Hi mam.
- George Papadopolis.
I'm so ashamed of you.
Oh, how could you?
- He didn't, I did.
I showed it to him and I'm sorry.
- Is that true?
[audience laughs]
- Well, I...
- Don't even try to cover for me, George.
She caught me red
-handed.
- Webster, I am so disappointed in you.
[sad music]
- [George] Katherine, you took his toys.
Don't you think you're,
you're being just a little too rough on him.
First grounding him and now, now his toys.
- I don't see much sense in confining a boy to his room
and then leaving him in there
with the entire content of Santa's workshop.
Besides George, you know, I expect you to back me on this.
I mean, we're, we're just gonna get nowhere
unless we present a united front.
[audience laughs]
- Well.
- Good.
We have to set Webster a good example
so that he can learn, agreed?
- Darling, I gotta talk to you.
Now, you might get mad at me for this.
Maybe you won't, maybe you will.
But just remember one thing, sweetheart,
I love you very much, okay?
- Okay, what?
- Webster didn't open that package, I did.
[Katherine laughs]
- Come on, George.
You gotta stop covering for him.
- I'm not covering for him, darling.
I'm telling you truth, honestly,
I, I opened that package.
If I'm lying, may I never eat another piece of baklava.
[audience laughs]
- Oh, nice try George.
You know, I've been thinking
that I haven't been tough enough on Webster.
- Haven't been tough enough.
- No.
- What would you like to do?
Cut his desserts.
- Good idea, George.
Oh boy, he'd really remember that one, yeah.
You know what I think what,
I'm gonna tell him that no more video arcade.
- Oh come on.
- He has to come home and do his homework
as he eats spinach and broccoli every single day this week,
he has to have his bath by :.
- But you're not nice.
[audience laughs]
- Come in.
- Hi, got a minute.
- Got the rest of my life, you grounded me remember?
- Oh honey, you're off the hook.
George just confessed.
- He did.
- I wasn't sure if he was telling the truth
until he said he'd never eat another piece of baklava again.
- Are you mad at him?
- You bet, I'm furious at him.
But he doesn't know that.
- What do you mean?
- Well, he still thinks that I don't believe him,
but I do, pretty sneaky huh?
- So sneaky, I don't get it.
- Oh come on honey, I want him to stew in his own juices.
- Oh, he thinks that you think that I don't know
that you know what really happened.
- Now you're talking.
- I'm talking, but I don't know what I'm saying.
- [Katherine] Honey it's simple.
I get mad at George
cause every year he spoils the birthday surprise, okay?
And he still thinks that I'm mad at you, got it?
- Let me get this straight, am I grounded or not?
- Of course you're not but we can't let George know that.
- Why not?
- Because it would spoil the big surprise
and this year, Webster, he's gonna get it.
[Webster squeaks]
[audience laughs]
- [George] Webby.
- ,
,
.
- Webb
- Yes.
- What are you doing?
- Counting beans, it's part of my punishment.
[audience laughs]
- My gallant little man.
- mam wants me to take inventory of all the food.
.
.
- It's terrible.
Well, I owe you one
and I'm gonna make it up to you, I promise.
- Well, there is one thing you could do.
- Raise your allowance.
- Its tempting
but what I really want is a promise.
- Name it.
- Promise that you'll never ask
about your birthday presents again.
- I'd rather have a root canal.
[audience laughs]
- Well, then it's back to the beans.
I lost count.
[audience moans and laughs]
,
,
.
- Okay, okay, okay, I promise.
I promise I'll never ask about my presents again.
- Good, cause I don't have to worry
about making mistakes like saying
your birthday present is upstairs.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
[audience laughs]
- No, you're not dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
We made a deal remember?
- That's relief.
Cause I was hoping I wouldn't let the cat out the closet.
I mean out of the bag.
I mean out of the bag in my closet.
You really know what I mean, don't you?
- Of course I know what you mean
and you have nothing to worry about,
as I said, it's over, this is the new me.
Well, I'm a little busy.
I'll see you later.
[audience laughs]
[audience laughs]
This isn't the top of the line tackle box.
[horns blowing]
- Surprise.
- What do you mean surprise?
- S
-U
-R
-P
-R
-I
-S
-E, surprise.
- Happy birthday, George.
- We knew you wouldn't last till tomorrow,
so we let you find your presents.
- It was mam's idea, pretty sneaky, huh?
- Well, we finally managed to surprise you.
- Yeah.
- Cassie and I gave you the electric yogurt maker.
It's in the green box.
- We gave you an electric yogurt maker for Christmas.
[audience laughs]
- And we loved it so much
we had to get you an identical one.
[audience laughs]
- George, this is the Swiss army knife, it's from me, see?
- Oh wow.
- And this one over here is from Jerry,
these are pre Colombian statues
that represent the God and Goddess of, get this, fertility.
- The God is for pepper and the Goddess is for salt.
And baby.
- And these
that you had your little baby brown eyes on, silk jammies.
[Webster wails]
[audience laughs]
- I can't believe this,
you took all the fun out of opening up the presents.
Katherine, what, why did you do that?
- Whoa.
- Because you said you hate surprises.
- Yeah, so that only left one thing to do,
♪ happy birthday to you ♪
♪ happy birthday to you ♪
♪ happy. ♪
- Birthday Dear Georgie.
Happy birthday to me.
- Good morning, George.
- Good morning George, that's it?
Oh, hi Cass.
- Oh, George, how do I get to Oak Brook?
- Oak Brook?
- Yes, I'm meeting a friend there for lunch.
- Oh, well you take the northbound on a drive
to the Eisenhower Expressway.
- Thank you.
- That's it, thank you?
- Oh, where are my manners?
Goodbye.
[audience laughs]
- Oh, come on Webster, we're gonna be late.
- Oh, great, where are we going?
- Oh, are we?
Oh, Webster and I are going shopping,
and then we're going to a matinee at the Goodman Theater.
- Oh and I'm not going?
- Well no, honey, you don't like going to the theater.
So I only got two tickets.
- Well, darling, today's, today's my birthday.
- I know.
Come on Webb, we're gonna be late.
- Oh, I get it.
You two are gonna go outside
and in a little while come back and surprise Georgie.
That's a good one.
- Now, correct me if I'm wrong,
but didn't we surprise you yesterday?
- Darling that wasn't my birthday?
- Yeah, but yesterday was when you wanted your presents.
- Champagne popped, wrapping tossed, birthday's over,
see you tonight.
- Yeah, but sweetheart.
- Have a nice day Georgie.
- Hey, George.
Boy do I have a great day planed for us?
- Really?
- I've got two tickets to the plumbing fixture
and tool show.
Then we're gonna slip over
and test drive the lawn tractors, come on.
- Oh, I just remembered my goodness sakes.
I've just, I have a previous engagement.
I'm terribly sorry, it sounds like fun.
- Oh, suit yourself pal
but you don't know what you are missing.
Have a nice day.
- Why does everybody keeps saying, have a nice day?
[whimsical music]
[doorbell rings]
[audience laughs]
It's open.
- Oh, thank heavens.
I thought nobody was home.
Is Katherine ready?
- Katherine?
No, she's gone out with Web for the day.
- She can't have,
she was supposed to take me to the airport.
- Where's your car?
- It's in the shop.
I mean, I had the mechanic drop me by here
because she said she'd take me.
- Well, she's forgotten.
She's forgotten a lot of things today.
- Oh, I'll never get a cab in time.
My plane leaves in less than an hour.
George,
I, I know that this is extremely pushy,
but I'm, I'm desperate.
Could you please give me a ride to the airport, huh?
- Fine.
I've got nothing else to do.
- Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
They are gonna put your bust
in the Good Guys Hall of Fame.
- Do you know that this is a very special day today?
- Oh, sure,
today is the first day of the rest of my vacation.
[whimsical music]
- [Announcer] Flight to Freeport
is now boarding at gate .
- Well,
there are Jerry, have a good time.
- Wait a minute, George.
I, I don't think I should be left alone.
- You're not alone, Jerry.
There's people in front of you.
- George, I've, I've never confided this in anyone before,
but I am, I am deathly afraid of flying.
- Take a train.
- To The Bahamas.
I mean, actually, once I'm in the air, I'm, I'm okay.
It's just the waiting in line that I can't stand.
The endless waiting with,
with nothing to think about except the absurdity of flight.
I mean, how do they keep that big thing up there?
[audience laughs]
- Okay, I'll stay with you.
- Oh, George, you know, I,
I've been looking to, forward to this vacation so much.
Getting a little sun, doing a little fishing.
- You fish?
- Did I say fishing?
- [Announcer] Jerry Silver,
please pick up the white courtesy telephone.
- Oh, George would you hold my place in line?
I'll, I'll be right back.
Here, here's my ticket.
See if you can give me an aisle seat.
- Next.
[audience laughs]
Smoking or non
-smoking, Sir.
- I, I don't know what he does.
See no, it's not, it's not for me.
It's for my friend, he'll be back in a minute.
- Immediate boarding, Sir.
- No, no, no, no.
- Have a nice flight.
- Surprise.
- You wanna go fishing?
- What's going on here?
- You're going on a vacation with mam
as your birthday present.
- Oh, but I checked Jerry's luggage already.
- Yeah, but my luggage, your clothes.
- Come on you guys,
come on, you have to catch a plane.
- This is wonderful but what about the champ?
- Yeah, I'm gonna be at Camp Parker.
- He's gonna be our only guest.
- He's a shoe in for camper of the week.
- Yeah, everything's taken care of
and boy did we get George the unsurprised.
- You sure did, you know, it's kind of fun to,
to be surprised like that.
Hey, goodbye champ.
Have a good time at Camp Parker.
- Okay.
- Goodbye sweetheart, I love you.
You be a good boy, you promise to.
- Do I have to?
- Yes you do.
Thanks for everything.
Goodbye, thank you, goodbye.
- Bye bye, goodbye, goodbye go.
Goodbye, goodbye.
- Bye bye.
- Yeah, yes.
[all laughing]
- So Bill, what do we do first?
Go to the ballgame, Circus, amusement park.
- Better than that,
I've got two tickets to the plumbing fixture and tool show.
[audience laughs]
- Mam, George, take me with you.
[upbeat music]
[audience clapping]
- Webster.
- Will be back.
- In a moment.
[Webster laughs]
[soothing music]
- Welcome home, Katherine and George.
It looks nice, Cassie.
Maybe we should taste it you know, see if it's okay.
- I think that we better close this box
before we drool ourselves to death.
- Boy oh boy, surprise, surprise.
You got a card from Katherine and George, Webster.
- Oh, great lemme see it.
- It says, they're having a wonderful time.
The fishing is good and the sun is beautiful.
- Oh, great lemme see it.
- Katherine got a tan and they've learned how to snorkel.
- Just read it to me, Bill.
- As a matter of fact, they're having such a good time.
They've decided to stay three more days.
[whimsical music]
- Three more days?
[audience laughs]
[audience clapping]
[upbeat music]
[upbeat music]
[upbeat music]