01x13 - Tale of 2 Snottys/Snotty's New Pet

[bunniefuu]

I'm just heading to the fields, duke, I'll be back.

[Animal noises]

Clear!

[♪...]

All right!

"Rat-abunga!"

Man: ♪ from the haystacks up to the hilltops ♪

♪ We go on dancing...

Otis: whoo-hoo!

♪ ...through the night

Ow, ow, ok, ow.

Ow!

Whoo!

♪ Do-si-do your partner, now

Ahh!

♪ Gonna party now till the morning light ♪

♪ Do-si-do and don't you know ♪

♪ It's just the way we animals roll. ♪

[Tires squeal... Engine revs]

Ha-ha!

[♪...]

I'm here.

[Screaming]

It's my little squirrelly nugget come to stay for the weekend.

No.

I brought you some flowers, auntie nora.

Well, aren't you a gentleman.

I'll go make you some "lil' spaz" energy drink.

Thank you.

Hi, uncle.

You reading the paper?

Don't move.

They can't see you if you don't move.

Huh?

How's this page?

Is this a good article?

How about this one?

Huh?

Oh, are you building a ship?

No.

That took me three days.

Tidal wave!

[Glass breaking]

[Sighing]

You're boring.

They should call you mr. Boring.

I'm gonna go play with the animals next door, mr. Boring.

Ok, I got your drinks.

[Door slamming]

What did you say to him?

[Sighing]

[Animals screaming]

Hi, stupid stinkies.

[Animals all talking at once...]

[Laughing]

Everyone, get on the roof.

It's our only hope.

You're not gonna get away that easily, cow.

Whoa-oh-oh!

Falling!

[Grunting]

Phew.

Ok, limbs intact, no permanent scarring, face still attached.

How's attila junior?

Uh...

He's broken.

[Gasping]

Oh no.

What do we do?

Party hearty!

[All talking and cheering]

[Heart b*ating and squeaking]

Guys, guys, calm down.

I can hear his organs.

The little jerks gonna be fine.

Bummer.

Well, let's go dump him back at the beadys' house.

We can't do that.

Mrs. Beady'll know it happened here and blame us.

So?

You know what animal control does with dangerous animals.

Chorus: ♪ we're all singing

♪ We're in high school

♪ We're adorable

♪ Makin' a musical

♪ In high school

♪ Adorable

♪ Makin' a musical...

[Screaming]

We'll just have to keep him here until he wakes up.

But that could take hours.

What if mrs. Beady comes looking for him?

Hm, good point.

How do we keep her from noticing her nephew's missing?

Oh, no, no, no, no.

I'm not dressing up again.

It never works.

What?

You look just like him.

Your "cheruby" little cheeks, your freckled snout.

Why, you're a proper little man.

No, something, something not right.

Put this on his head.

Otis: there it is.

Freddy: amazing!

[Animals all talking at once]

Guys, I'm telling you, they're never gonna buy it.

Yeah, they will.

Just kick lots of stuff and call everything "stupid."

Then when snotty wakes up, we'll come over and get you.

But guys, [stammering].

Otis: yeah, I know, you're the best.

Get out of here.

Good luck.

Ah, crud monkeys.

Oh, dear.

Where could he be?

I don't like him hobnobbing with those weird animals.

[Knocking]

I'm not a talking pig!

Oh, there you are, my silly little man.

Come in.

Lunch is ready.

So, um, uh...

Oh, this place is stupid.

[Glass breaking]

You're stupid too.

Uh, no offense, sir.

Nathan, stop upsetting him!

[Sighing]

I know how much you like yellow food

So here's some yummy mac 'n' cheese and delicious lemon squares.

I don't want your... Say what?

Whoa.

[Gulping]

[Sniffs]

Somebody smell spaghetti?

[♪...]

[All talking and cheering]

Excuse me.

Pardon me.

[Record scratching]

[Wheezing]

Could someone please tell me where I am?

And also, who I am?

Oh, he's seen us.

He'll tell others.

We'll all be sold on the internet.

Abby: freddy, no!

[Freddy gasping]

Your arms are too weak.

Let bessy do it.

Yeah.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Uh, how's it going there, little guy?

You seem like a wise and kindly soul.

Can you tell me where I am?

Sweet, he's got amnesia.

That's latin for the best thing that ever could've happened to us.

Otis, what are you talking about?

Don't you see?

He doesn't remember he's a jerk, which means he'll never bother us again.

Excuse me.

Are you people all talking animals?

No, no.

We're a theater troupe in costume for our brand-new show, "fur town"

Appearing in a small town theatre near you.

Well, it's getting late and we've had a good talk.

It's time to get you home.

[Video game beeping]

Thank you, auntie nora.

Hey, uncle.

[Grunting]

My eyes.

I was just offering you a cookie.

[Doorbell ringing]

I'll get it.

You guys relax.

You've done enough.

Man, this kid has one sweet deal.

[Screaming]

Did I hear someone at the door?

No, no.

What door?

We don't have any doors.

Oh, don't you be such a little silly-willy-billy-tilly-billy.

Good afternoon, ma'am.

The nice theater troupe man said I'm your nephew.

Sweetums, why are you outside when you're standing right next to me?

[Screaming]

Auntie nora, he's clearly an impostor.

He's probably one of those talking animals from next door in disguise.

Yes.

That's the only explanation.

He's not even wearing proper clothes.

Get out of here, you camel, or whatever you are.

Scoot, or I'll call the police.

Get out!

Sorry to have troubled you.

Have a nice day.

What the cud happened?

I think you were mistaken.

The nice boy living there says he'stheir nephew.

What?

Oh, you pink, chubby little troll.

Ok, listen up.

Pig's been seduced by the sweet life.

Now, the only way to get him back

Is to turn snotty boy back to his old, evil self, so mrs. Beady will recognize him.

Are you loco?

Did you hear what you just said?

Otis?

He's lost it.

What's the rush?

I don't mind keeping snotty boy a little longer.

Hey, guys, I wrote a song for your theater troupe.

♪ I'm pablo the happy unicorn

♪ With a friendly smile and a rainbow horn ♪

♪ I pick pretty flowers all day long ♪

♪ And then I smile and sing my song. ♪

Right, get rid of him.

[All agreeing at once]

Pig: marry me, "mer-princess," and surrender your medical benefits.

[In high-pitched voice]: no, no.

Not until I see a ring.

Oh, here we go again with the ring.

You can't hide from me, because I'm scuba-man.

[Gurgling]

Eugene's voice is getting so low.

I think it's time you give him "the talk".

[Groaning]

When a bird and a bee love each other very much, they get married.

Pretty soon, the bird starts losing her mind and seeing talking animals everywhere

And the bee, oh, the poor bee, is left sitting in a chair all night

Trying to remember what life was like before he d*ed inside.

Oh, poor uncle.

Here.

My eyes.

Come here.

I just want to give you a reassuring man hug.

I don't know.

Come on.

♪ "Glooken shpeela, glooken shpala" ♪

♪ "Glooken nana, sleep in hookie" ♪

Oh, sometimes, it hurts so bad.

There, there, there.

Let it all out.[Sobbing]

All right, if this awesome plan doesn't get snotty boy back on the path to evil, nothing will.

A birthday party?

No, a stupid party.

We're just gonna act as mean to each other as possible

Until it triggers the darkness lurking inside that little monster.

Peck: shh, here he comes.

Oh, what a lovely dinner party.

Thank you for having me.

Our pleasure.

Pip, would you please pass the cheese?

No problem, buttface.

Whoa.

Have some stupid chips.

Don't forget the stupid dip.

Your hair is stupid.

This plan is stupid.

[All talking at once...]

Eugene: my, what a mess we've made.

You keep having fun.

I'll just tidy up.

♪ I'm pablo the happy unicorn

It's not working.

He's still good.

Why...?

[Thunder crashes]

Pig: ♪ the big loud thunderstorm won't scare me ♪

♪ It won't scare me, it won't scare me ♪

♪ The big loud thunderstorm won't scare me ♪

♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la

[Laughing]yeah!

Tummy tickle.

[Both laughing]

Oh, uncle.

I never want to leave here.

[Yawning]

Sleepy.

Sweet dreams... Son.

Pip: otis, what are you doing?

Facing facts, pipster.

The snotty boy we knew and hated is gone

So I'm giving the new, equally annoying one a bed up here

So the farmer will never see him.

Freddy, the stupid party is over.

Then here.

You can wash the stupid plate.

Whoa!

Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh!

A little help.

I'll catch you, otis.

[Screaming]

[Grunting]

Ok, this time, he's got to be toast.

[Grunting]

What, what happened?

Why are you all looking at me, you stupid stinkies?

Uh-oh.

What am I doing on this stupid farm?

Out of my way, stupid stinkies.

[Cheering]

[Video game beeping]

I'm back.

Where's my stupid lunch?

[Screaming]

It's the talking camel!

Who are you?

And what are you doing with my stuff?

Give it back.

No, it's my stuff.

No way.

[Grunting]

Pig: it's my stuff, it's my stuff.

I'm her real nephew.

I'mher real nephew.

Oh, dear.

Which one is my "eugeney-weeny?"

I am, and I'll prove it.

[Squealing]

Oh yeah?

Back at you, stupid phony.

You're the stupid phony.

[Grunting]

I've had enough.

[Grunting]

Hey, what's going on in here?

[Grunting]

Uncle nathan!

Look out!

[Glass breaking]

[Gulping]

You're the imposter.

My eugene would never risk his life to save that lump.

But auntie, i...

[Grunting][stammering]

Bye, stupid kid who looks like me.

Oh, nathan.

Isn't it wonderful?

We have the real eugene back again.

Oh, it hurts.

It hurts so bad.

[♪...]

[Cheering and applause...]

[♪...]

Get down, duke.

You know, duke, you're an amazing dancer.

I'm not dancing.

Ow, ooh.

I'm being eaten by fleas.

Ooh!

[Pig burping]

Hey, otis.

Pip, look what just arrived.

My new me-phone.

Chorus: ♪ ahh...

The phone that completely consumes your life.

Uh, yeah, that's great.

Um, I'm going next door to raid the mousetraps.

Can you spot me?

Hey, I can download music too.

Forget it.

You're obviously not listening to a word I say.

Everything you say, buddy.

Pip: hah.

You call these traps?

I'm a mouse, not an idiot.

Come to papa!

Banzai!

I am the mousetrap king.

Now to find some crackers.

Eugene: here, stupid mouse.

Nice, stupid mouse.

Uh-oh.

I know that creepy voice.

Hey, the cheese is gone, but there's no stupid mouse.

Stupid mousetraps.

Totally lame.

I hate you.

[Trap snaps]

[Gasping]

Pip: too bad, lard-butt.

[Stammering]

Hah-hah, nothing can catch me.

I stand corrected.

Eugene: stupid mouse.

Looks like I'm the big cheese now.

[Laughing]

Say goodbye to your stupid barnyard, because you'll never see it again.

Easy, pip.

Don't pellet yourself.

Otis will quickly realize you're gone and race to the rescue.

Otis: eat hyper-plasma, space spawn.

Yo, dum-dum.

I said we need to clear this table for the mosh pit.

You gonna move your flank steak or what?

Can't talk.

Blasting aliens.

Also buying spatula used in the movie "penguin cop" on "ibay."

[Whistling]

[Beeping]

Sweet heavens, I have e-mail!

Welcome to your new, stupid home, mouse.

You won't be lonely, 'cause I have a special friend for you to play with.

His name is stinky mcstupidhead, and he loves juicy mice.

[Hissing]

Totally denied.

You can't eat him yet, dumb snake.

I'm gonna fatten him up first.

I'll see you in the morning.

Enjoy your stupid cages.

[Laughing]

Man, I can't stand that kid.

What a jerk.

He's not a jerk.

You're a jerk.

[Laughing]

Hey, you talk just like him.

That's so cute.

It is not.

He raised me from a snake egg, and I love him.

Ok, relax.

Don't get your coil in a knot.

We could be friends.

We're all animals here, right?

Want to be pals?

♪ You're gonna be in my belly.

[Laughing]

Wow, that's terrifying andannoying.

Eek, bright light!

Otis, you still in there?

The party's been over for hours.

Not in here.

I'm formatting my photo album while I watch all six seasons of "whatchoo' talkin' about?"

Hey, otis, is pip in there with you?

I haven't seen him for hours.

Yeah, yeah, he's around.

I just saw him.

He was going out to raid the mousetraps.

Oh, no.

Come on, guys.

We got to go find pip.

[Beeping]

[♪...]

Right after I learn how to turn off the disco function.

No, bessy, that's my cheese.

Yours is over there.

[Crashing noise]

[Screaming]

Eugene: breakfast time, stupid mouse.

Get it while it's all mushy and gross.

Hey.

[Hissing]

[Gasping]

So you think that was funny, stupid snake?

You know what else is funny?

Snake dress-up.

Look at you.

You're a girly snake.

Girly snake, girly snake.

I'll be back for more fun later.

Girly snake.

Man, why do you take that?

You should totally bite his butt.

No, I deserved it.

I disrespected him.

Dude, it doesn't have to be this way.

There's a whole big world out there

A world where animals don't have to be abused by tubby dweebs.

Yeah, right.

You're lying, you big liar.

No, it's true.

And if we work together, we could both get out of here.

Oh yeah, stupid mouse?

How?

I can text my friend on the computer, and he'll come save us.

Well, I am so tired of being so mistreated.

Hey, if I help you get out of your cage, will you help me get out of mine?

Totally.

I swear on a big block of cheddar.

Excellent.

Ok, here goes.

Hey, take it easy.

[Pip screaming]

Now you let me out.

Ok.

But we're still cool, right?

Of course.

You're my new best friend.

I love you.

Ok.

Thanks, stupid mouse.

Let's get to work.

Indeed.

We searched everywhere, otis.

All we found were these sprung mousetraps.

What have I done?

I should've gone with him, but I was too wrapped up in my super-awesome phone.

Chorus: ♪ ahh...

I will never use this delightful phone again.

Never, never!

[Phone beeping]

Oh, please don't leave me again.

I love you so much.

Oh, hey, it's a text message from pip.

B-h-p, ampersand, s-b-b, sad face.

Huh?

I speak text.

He says he's being held prisoner in snotty boy's bedroom.

Snotty boy.

I should've guessed.

[Phone beeping]

Oh, hang on, there's more.

G-t-p-t-a?

He says, give the phone to abby.

Huh?

[Gasping]

Otis, that kid's trying to feed him to a snake.

We got to do something.

We will, abby.

Barnyard strike force, deploy.

[Phone beeping]

Ooh, tiny toast is done.

Who wants tiny toast?

Now, we wait.

You want to shop for dvds?

[Screaming]

[Hissing]

Hey, hey, what are you doing?

I thought we had a deal.

Stupid, juicy, delicious mouse.

I tricked you with my "stuperior" intelligence.

[Laughing]

Hey, you're out of your t*nk.

Totally off limits.

Poor snake.

You must've been lonely.

Maybe you need a visit from mister mongoose.

[Hissing...]

I'm mister mongoose, and I love the great taste of snake.

I know I shouldn't care.

I just can't watch this.

Eugene: I'm a stupid, stinky mcstupidhead, and I'm afraid of mongoose.

[Fabric ripping]

What?

Hey, stupid mouse.

No one exposes my undies and lives.

[Screaming]

[Stammering]

Hah!

[Screaming]

Phew.

[Stammering...]

[Grunting]

Got you, stupid mouse.

[Hissing]

[Screaming]

[Laughing]

Oh, I love charades.

Is it a movie title?

Oh, oh, "free willy."

Surround the house.

Shh.

[Whispering]: ok, surround...

Shh.

Ugh, I got it.

Surround the house, and wait for my signal.

[Phone beeping]

[Screaming], big band function.[♪...]

Well, what are you waiting for?

Do you expect me to beg?

'Cause I'll totally beg.

Please, please, don't eat me.

I'm spicy.

Sorry, stupid mouse.

I'm starving.

[Gulping]

[Coughing]

Oh, I can't do it.

No one ever stood up for me before.

You might be the only real friend I've ever had.

Yeah, that's great.

Now could I please get a moist towelette?

[Toilet flushing]

[Whistling]

[Laughing]

Hey.

Haven't you eaten that mouse yet?

I command you to eat him.

Eat him.

Eat him.

Eat him, eat him.

Otis: it's pip.

He's gonna be snake chow.

[Phone whirring]

[Screaming], dental exam function.

[Grunting]

That didn't hurt.

Ok, we're going in.

Like we practiced, skunky.

Odor in the hole!

Huh?

Skunk grenade.

Hold your breath.

[All coughing and gagging]

Go, go, go, go!

Is that all you need?

Yeah, I think we're good.

[Pip coughing]

Oh, pip, buddy.

Thank goodness I was finally able to decode your complicated text message.

You mean abby read it to you?

Pretty much.

[Grunting]

He's waking up.

You've got to get out of here.

[Screaming], scary snake!

It's ok, he's cool.

Dude, come with us.

He'll never find you in the barnyard.

No, this is my stupid home.

But from now on, I'll stand up for myself.

And I owe it all to you, you wise, brave, noble...

Pip: hey, hey!

Sorry, sorry.

That was inappropriate, I know.

And on that disturbing note, barnyard strike force, away!

Do you mind?

[Otis screaming]

[Crashing]

Oh, stupid snake.

This is all your fault.

Remember mister mongoose?

Ok, that's cool.

Then we don't have to play with mister mongoose.

[Hissing]

[Eugene screaming and stammering]

Dude, I totally texted you.

T-f-s-m-i, heart, m-n-p, happy face?

Thanks for saving me.

I love my new phone.

Right.

Oh, I totally got the hang of this now.

I-w, two, a-g, asterisk, s-p.

You want to ask my grandmother to the senior prom?

Yes.

Yes, I do.

Dr. Glove: ok, yeah, interesting.

You're inside a snake, aren't you?

Yeah, you're deep in there.

Ok, this might be very painful.

[Groaning]

Ah-ah, just a few more hours.

[♪...]

Deep voice: o...

Squeaky voice: ...mation.