01x01 - Something for The City

[bunniefuu]

♪ Get down, yes!
Uh-huh uh-huh ♪

♪ Slip and slide records, uh ♪

♪ Being taken to the house,
just get on up and get down ♪

- Miami, b*tches!
- Woo!

Turn up!

♪ Take it to day house,
c'mon now, uh, uh ♪

- Let me see them titties!
- Baby!

What happens in Miami...

Just kidding, Tom. One penis
for the rest of my life!

I can help who's next.

Oh! I'm next! It's my
f*cking bachelorette weekend!

Hey. Aren't you the rapper
girl from that video?

♪ n*gg*s that's gon' make you ♪

♪ Get up out yo seat
and get down ♪

Dang, what you doin' here?

♪ 'Cause I'm Black ♪

♪ Just because you with us,
you can't hang with us ♪

♪ I got a mask for COVID,
I ain't dangerous ♪

♪ And hands up in the air,
they wanna aim at us ♪

♪ Went from picking cotton
to counting money ♪

♪ I got paper cuts,
I'm flexing ♪

Yeah, this is you.

You was that soundtrack
at the protest.

Yeah, yeah, that's me.
That's, like, two years old.

Damn!
That sh*t was cold.

Hey, we need more
female rappers like you.

Sisters with self-respect.

Man. So, why'd you stop?

You got to keep going.

No, I didn't stop!
I didn't stop!

I'm just paying my bills.
Like, I still make music

under The Vision. I actually
just uploaded a video.

- Oh, for real?
- Yeah.

♪ ...phenomenal creature ♪

♪ Capture your
soul with her eyes ♪

♪ And be mesmerized
by her features ♪

♪ The goddess,
promise, nurturer ♪

♪ The guider, the
teacher, with the body ♪

♪ The essence, the
Garden of Eden ♪

♪ She's the one true savior... ♪

- So is this for, like, Women's History Month?
- Shh, shh.

Okay.

You on that queen sh*t.

That's what's up. Hey,

I only want my daughter
to listen to your sh*t.

That's so nice. How old is she?

Oh, I don't have one yet.

- Oh.
- Ready?

- Alright. Keep your head up now!
- Okay.

- Thank you! Thank you!
- We have room for you!

- Oh! My username is @shawna... underscore...
- Got it!

They're gone. Okay.

Hey, Jill! Um, I know
you saw my texts, girl.

Your read receipts are on. Um...

Did you get any updates?
Has Crystal heard the song yet?

Let me know.

♪ Easy money, I just
pick it up and go, hey! ♪

♪ Easy money, I just
pick it up and go ♪

♪ Got the money plays,
blowing up my phone ♪

♪ Got the money plays,
blowing up my phone ♪

♪ Hey! Easy money ♪

Okay. See you. Have fun.

Look at today's
blazer, y'all. This n*gga muttin'.

- Just say you like to show me off.
- Oh my god.

Maurice, which one of y'all
little hoes dress you today?

Oh, so...

- So you puttin' your bid in?
- Oh my god.

I'll teach you some things.
I been trying to tell you.

- No, no.
- Excuse me.

Uh, w-where is the beach?

It's everywhere. Bro,
you ain't even trying.

- What's wrong with you? What's with... You were mean.
- What you mean?

- I didn't even clock in yet. I didn't even clock in yet.
- You a mean n*gga.

She's back, she's back,
she's back. She's back. Shh.

- The sham continues.
- The Duke of Miami!

The p*ssy-slanging plug. Ew!

Nah, but check it
out. Pull up tonight...

This is basically
her office at this point.

- Come on, she gotta scout clients for her hoes.
- Hold up, hold up, hold up!

- You was in my boy Renaldo's section last night.
- Oh yeah?

- Yeah, I hooked that up! Yes!
- Oh word? How you know Renaldo?

Man, Renaldo? Li'l Ree-Ree?

- We used to slap box since we was like this age.
- Oh. Slap box?

Come on, now. Slap, slap, slap!

- Okay.
- What y'all on tonight?

Whenever a VIP comes in,

she says she gonna connect
them with another VIP.

Meanwhile, this bitch don't
know nobody in this place.

- So green.
- Say less. Ha!

Hey, you know you just
described a genius to me, right?

- Bro, the sweat never dies, cuz.
- Can you tell me where the jet skis are?

- You paying with cash? I can help you out.
- Yeah.

- Let me help you out right now.
- All that good stuff!

- Aight.
- Man! Yeah, you know me...

Come on, now.
Making plays.

Hey, you recording me?

- What? No!
- You don't own this lobby!

Look at her
hatin' ass! Man, she...

Little bitch that work up here!

Nah,
man! Check this out!

We at the
Office! Eh, turn up! You already know

the Duke of Miami, fresh
tat on here. You see me?

Hey! We got money, we got
b*tches, we got bottles, we got it all!

You know how my
section do. Pull up on them.

Talk that sh*t, ladies!

- Talk to them, Guap!
- What's happening, baby? You know what I'm sayin'? 2000.

- Where we at? We... We at the Office. Yeah, it's going crazy.
- Eh!

Hey, look! Our night's
just getting started!

We fittin' to turn up tonight!
I'm about to give them that

TittyBoi tour! You
already know how I do!

- I'm typing "titties" in the GPS right now.
- Hey!

- Where they at?
- You know Lil U*i?

Hey, look, I
gotta connect y'all!

- Shh, I'm on the phone. Shawna!
- Hey, Mia.

- Could...
- D-did you mean to FaceTime me?

- Oh no, you go ahead. Go ahead. Okay.
- Yeah, I did. You...

I feel so bad calling
you out the blue like this,

but you still work
at the Plymouth?

- It's a day job, but yeah. Why?
- Thank you, Jesus.

I feel so burnt,
but I need a favor.

My baby daddy was supposed to
pick up my daughter from school,

- and he didn't wait.
- Wait, she's in school already?

He never follow through
and I be needing help.

But anyway, I'm doing makeup
for these girls at the Plymouth,

and I don't wanna look all
unprofessional and bring her.

Y'all
got some real... Be quiet!

- Y'all got some rooms I can set her in?
- Oh. Um...

Listen. I promise, I-I thought
of everybody else I could call.

My mama at work.
Lamont grandma is sick.

It's just...

I mean, it'll only
be, like, for a few.

I just... I just need somebody
to watch her real quick.

No, it-it's fine. It's
fine. I'll be there.

- Thank you so much, girl.
- Yeah.

- Okay. I'll be there in, like, 30. Goodbye.
- Thirty?

Did I tell y'all about this
one n*gga who I used to f*ck with?

That proposed to
me on my birthday?

I said, "But, where
is my present?"

Like, show me my present.

'Cause nobody wasn't
trying to marry his debt.

Broke n*gga.

♪ How you always pulling
up, but you ain't got a will... ♪

Look-it, y'all. Do
it again, Lissa!

How you do
that? How you do that?

♪ How you do that?
How you do that? ♪

Let me tell y'all something.

These n*gg*s only
know two things.

p*ssy and money,

and they both go
hand-in-hand, and if you got one,

you could get the other.

♪ Burn my city like a new jay ♪

Uh-uh, girl!

Who taught you that?

♪ Don't need no silicone
because my ass too fat ♪

I gotta put her in a
white preschool, okay?

DM me some spots!

I ain't above seducing
and scheming these n*gg*s.

Seduce and scheme!

♪ Seduce and scheme ♪

♪ Seduce and scheme! ♪

And it's dat!

♪ Seduce and scheme ♪

♪ Seduce and scheme! ♪

And it's dat!-

Y'all got me actin' all crazy
out here on my lunch break.

Why do you have to record me?

Because it's a reaction video!

And when people
search for the song,

they gonna find my sh*t, too.

Or they could just google
"hobosexual Haitian,"

- and you the first result.
- Bro,

I'm tryin' to put you on game.

Okay, you always complain
about being slept on,

- but you don't wanna put them to sleep.
- Please just play the video

before Angie comes
back and fires us again.

♪ It's Reina Reign, b*tches ♪

♪ Okay, he right back
in it like it's cr*ck ♪

♪ 'Cause once you
f*ck with Reign ♪

♪ You ain't never going back ♪

Why are you showing me this?

p*ssy this, p*ssy that.
What's, what is it about?

You know that girl you put
me onto, like, two years ago

- who was doing acoustic covers of rap songs?
- Yeah...

- Wait. No...
- Mm. God...

- This is a white?
- This a white.

- She looks so different.
- Yeah, she does.

She got a lot of work done.

- Yeah, she did.
- Oh my god, look at her nose.

- Look at her ass!
- It's good.

She used to be, like,
Kirsten Dunst white.

Yep.

That's your boy's
doing right there.

My boy?

Francois Boom.
That's how I found her.

♪ Okay, he right back in it ♪

Oh sh*t, you ain't know?

I mean, maybe if you were

to listen to that n*gga,

you would have had a
million views, too. Ew...

♪ Y'all know where
to f*cking find 'em ♪

♪ If you looking for 'em,
riding through Bal Harbour... ♪

Excuse me? Ma'am?

I requested an early check-in,
and they are telling me

that my room isn't ready.

Okay, just follow
me to the front desk.

We gonna get you figured out.

Just call me
when my room is ready.

I will be taking
this to corporate!

Okay.

Hm. Alright! Okay.

Now, you can make videos
just like Mommy does.

- You wanna make a tutorial?
- Yeah!

She
gotta record every damn thing.

I gotta watch what
I do around her.

Okay...

Damn, I can't
believe how big she is.

Yeah, she was like 2
last time you seen her.

- What was that at?
- Oh, that was at, um,

Karena's "Back That Ass
Up" barbecue.

Right.

Um, I can K-Wang now.
I mean, I'm not good at it,

but I c... I could do it.
I could hold my own.

The aunties will be proud.

- Mommy, can you pass me the purple lipstick?
- Girl,

you see I'm trying
to pack up and leave,

and you gonna ask me
for the purple lipstick?

Okay, let me help.

Thank you.

Oh! Girl, I seen you
had got signed, and...

you had a viral video
or something like that?

Yeah. Um...

Yeah, it didn't work
out. It didn't work out,

but I decided I'm better off
doing my own stuff anyway, so...

I be watching your
other raps sometime.

You be going off!

But girl...

why you wear that mask?

Because I want people
to focus on my lyricism,

not what I look like. You know,

all these female rappers
have their ass and titties out

just to be taken seriously?
Come on, that's wack.

Mm. I mean, the
game is the game.

Hey, look,

I really, really
appreciate you though.

If you ever need a face done,

a favor, whatever,
just... just hit me.

- Okay.
- Okay?

Oh my god.

Girl, what you doing over
there with this makeup?

Listen, please don't use all the
battery on Ms. Shawna's phone.

And don't use the iPad
while it's plugged in the wall

- because what?
- Because it can explode in my face...

Exactly, and then nobody wanna
watch your little videos, okay?

I love you. Give me air kiss.

- Alright, I gotta go. Good luck.
- See you.

Oh!

How I look?

Mm...

- I'm cute?
- Need a little more touch.

♪ When I post, the news
stop, if I post my nudes, I ♪

♪ Have the world like ooh aah ♪

♪ This right here that new bop ♪

♪ Type to make the mood stop ♪

♪ I don't follow rules, I just
break them and call my ♪

♪ Yo, call me on
my celly phone ♪

♪ Hate when you leave me alone ♪

♪ I don't like to Instagram ♪

♪ I don't like when you be out ♪

♪ I just want yo fine ass home ♪

♪ I know exes hate
me, now can't date you ♪

♪ So, they hate you now ♪

Yes, you, sir.

Thank you, Attorney Crump.
How do we bring change

to policing in this country

so there can be
greater accountability?

You asked
a very profound question.

You always do this. Can you
move your hand so I can read it?

- What?
- Are you serious? Do you s... Do you see how stingy he is?

- Share!
- You're looking at my whole outline!

In this special live edition
of Crabs In A Barrel,

the King n*gga
Crab strikes again.

The original Jack Ryan...

- Harrison Ford!
- No, no! Alec Baldwin!

Fatima for the win!

Next stop, Block East,

2nd Avenue and 62nd Street.

- God...
- This is a white?

- Look at her ass!
- So you ain't know?

Oh, my god.
She got so much work done.

- It's Reina.
- It's Francois.

♪ I do this sh*t every day ♪

♪ Ain't nothing
change but the play ♪

♪ Ain't nothing
change but the play ♪

♪ Hustle the same,
pretty and paid ♪

♪ Bad but you broke and
you lame, we ain't the same ♪

♪ Swerve out my lane, hoe,
nobody knows you you Jane Doe ♪

♪ Slim in the waist,
yo dude wanna taste ♪

♪ It's Reina, you
know what I came for ♪

I produced this sh*t!

Boy, what you know
about that Boom Factor?

We livin', boy, we
livin'! Look! Look!

f*ck all these broke boys!

But look, I got the ashtray.

When you a successful artist,

you know that money
comin' right back.

I'll burn this sh*t.

I'll make this sh*t back today.

Follow Francois Boom,
send this to a broke boy!

Broke boy or girl! There's girls
out here that's broke! I know some.

I know y'all mad!
Y'all mad, too, look!

Y'all mad?

You know what? f*ck this.

I'm tired of being slept on!

I'm tired of being underrated!

Y'all's favorites are out
here doing the bare minimum

with no originality,
while I'm over here

living and breathing
this rap sh*t! What?

I'm done being patient.
No. I'm done caring.

Y'all say, "Ooh,

I want a different
type of female rapper."

No, you f*cking
don't! No, you don't!

'Cause you're not supporting
me! You're not supporting any of us!

So what's the point?
Y'all listen to the same sh*t

over and over again! It's tired!

It's with a heavy
heart, I'm gonna just

tell y'all right now,
I'm retiring. Here.

Here's my pink slip.
That's it. I'm done.

'Cause I work too f*ckin' hard

and y'all don't
respect good music.

Y'all lost a real one.

It's just such a sell-out move.

Now, he's promoting
this Blackface-ass artist.

Y'all fell out years ago.

You're on different waves.
Nobody's even associating you

with him anymore.

Oh, wait. Are we
gettin' started?

Wait, I-I made a playlist.

- Okay.
- Wait. What?

I really just took songs
from the Dream Radio.

Oh. Oh, yeah. Can we, um,
can we try for another night?

Tonight's already another time.

No, no, no. I just... I'm not
in the mood. I feel stupid.

You think I don't?

I'm not... I'm not proud
to be having virtual sex,

but we haven't seen
each other in four months.

Cliff, I'm gonna see
you in, like, two weeks.

You bought the ticket?

Almost.

So, no?

No! I don't even

look good right now.
I don't even feel good.

No, you look sexy! Come on.

I don't know, Cliff.

I feel... I just feel behind.

Behind what?

You wouldn't get it.

Your life has a track.
You can see your progress.

Your future is guaranteed.

No, it's not. Nothing
is guaranteed for me.

Okay. Like I said,
you do not get it.

Is fighting gonna
make you feel better?

Because I feel like you
just tryin' to pick a fight.

Maybe I wouldn't pick fights
if you weren't commenting

on other girls'
Instagram photos.

What are you even talking about?

Y-you're deflecting
hard as hell right now.

I'm not deflecting.
Fatima likes you,

and you are literally
always with her.

I'm always around a bunch
of people. We study together.

Do you think I'm stupid?

I'ma go finish studying.

Just text me when you're
ready to stop playing

these silly-ass games.

- Ma'am, we are so sorry.
- You are not sorry.

If you were sorry,
you would fix it!

We have all these rooms at capacity.
There are so many conferences...

I know there are conferences!
I am speaking at one!

- You know what? Let me talk to your manager.
- Okay, give me one sec.

This is absolutely
ridiculous. Look at her.

She's so satisfied with
herself. She is so happy

about being bad at her job.

- Give me my card!
- Here you go.

Just call me
when my room is ready.

I will be taking
this to corporate!

Hey, I got another card.

Um, how soon can
you get me some cash?

Shawna, that smell good! Uh,
you make enough for me and bae?

- Just kidding.
- Girl,

in Miami, we don't
play that, alright?

You gotta let these dudes
know what you ain't about.

Okay, if you not paying
my rent, I ain't 'bout it,

Alright? If you're not on
your hustle, I ain't 'bout it.

Mm-hmm. If you can't
satisfy me, I ain't 'bout it!

If you're too
emotionally available,

and bald, I ain't 'bout it!

- - Yes!
- Specifics! Let 'em know!

Come on,
Mia! Look at the camera.

- Wait, do a picture with us!
- Mia!

To all the b*tches
who need to hear this.

Stop depending on these n*gg*s.

'Cause all they're gonna
do is disappoint you.

Like, f*ck a broke,
useless male.

Real b*tches gonna ride for you.

I ain't never been the type,

"Oh, I can't stand
these females."

Uh-uh. Nah. Real b*tches...

gonna rock with realer b*tches.

Good night.

♪ Nobody nobody,
we can get gangsta ♪

♪ Or we can keep it cordial,
how you wanna go about it? ♪

♪ How you wanna do? I don't
backtrack, man, f*ck that ♪

♪ I don't miss nobody,
I don't miss nothing ♪

♪ Left it on seen,
I ain't write back ♪

♪ I don't trust nobody, I
just looked at my wrist ♪

♪ I got tired today, f*ck it,
I'm crossing the line today ♪

Yeah, I used to dance.

But, I don't like n*gg*s
touching me though.

Nah, I gotta want
you to touch me.

♪ That sh*t that you just put
out, you coulda kept, yep ♪

♪ She got a n*gga,
he got a shirt, why? ♪

Yeah, I can dance for you.

♪ She ate the D
through my underwear ♪

♪ Got up and got
ourself outta there ♪

♪ I see they put me
on memes and things ♪

♪ Don't speak on my life
without knowing the real ♪

♪ Eight figures a year
woulda cost me the leader ♪

♪ Don't hold it, just
say what you feel ♪

♪ But watch your mouth
before I flash your bitch ♪

♪ To a place that
she didn't know exist ♪

You gotta pay extra for that.

♪ Keeping my piece on top
of my sheet, six figure chip... ♪

Tips are welcome.

Oh, you quick to spend.

♪ Bitch on like n*gga zone,
like b*tches on like nobody ♪

♪ Nobody, nobody,
we can get gangsta ♪

♪ We can keep it cordial,
how you wanna go about it? ♪

♪ How you wanna do it? I
don't backtrack, man, f*ck that ♪

♪ I don't miss nobody,
I don't miss nothing ♪

♪ Left it on seen,
I ain't write back ♪

♪ I don't trust nobody, I
just looked at my wrist ♪

♪ I got time today, f*ck it,
I'm crossing the line today ♪

Oh!

Well...

I'll see y'all again
next Tuesday.

Thank y'all for subscribing!

Yo!

What happened today?

- You say what?
- What happened today?

Hey, yo, I'm in the middle
of this studio session.

It is kinda loud, so you
gonna have to speak up...

Okay, so turn the music
down! Step outside! I mean, it's...

It's... f*cking stupid?

Aight, or keep using
your outside voice.

- I can hear you like that.
- She about to cr*ck a whip...

Okay, so stop acting like
you can't hear me then!

- Chill out, man, just chill.
- I already don't like your ass.

Hold up.

What's popping?

I need your half of
the money for the rent.

And for Melissa.

I told you I got you.

And you don't.

You couldn't even pick up
your daughter from preschool.

It's not that hard,
Lamont! Damn!

I work three jobs.
Why are you over there

just doin' whatever
the f*ck you want to do?

- Pitching in whenever the f*ck you feel like it?
- Okay.

So first, I'm really praying
that my daughter's asleep,

so she ain't gotta
hear all this, you know,

foul language and
negativity and stuff like that.

And second, I really don't
appreciate, like, the assertion

that I'm just in here
doing me and sh*t like that

when I'm working

- with the one and only prolific Ocho-8...
- Lamont!

- Who just complimented my m*therf*cking work ethic...
- Lamont!

'cause I'm here doing this
sh*t, aight? For real, for real.

- I just want to hear about the money, like...
- Nah...

Lemme finish. My bad if I paused

and that was too long for
you, but I wasn't finished.

Alright, you can indulge me
until the end of my statement,

which is...

I got you. Okay?

- You'll have some relief by next week.
- Next week too late, Lamont!

Rent due Friday! Damn!

Stop making me do
this sh*t by myself!

I need a partner!

Catch more flies
with honey, love.

f*ck the flies!

Yo! Y'all
know what might m*therf*cking hit?

- What's that?
- n*gga, accordions.

- What, like, accordions?
- Yeah, n*gga! That sh*t just came to me.

Yes, accordions. Yeah, that
sh*t with the air in the middle!

Yeah!

Let's go! All me.

Did you see that? Genius sh*t.

But other than that, you
good though, li'l mama?

Stupid-ass G.

♪ Jucee... get back ♪

♪ These n*gg*s
sidewalk, they ain't street ♪

♪ These n*gg*s ride
d*ck way better than me ♪

♪ These n*gga pillowtalkin'... ♪

'Cause the party going dumb,
dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Girl, what kind of
parties you be at?

Oh, I was... I was
being sarcastic.

♪ I buy that sh*t ♪

♪ Hoe don't try me
bitch, this that body sh*t ♪

To a reunion.

Reunited!

Let's bust it!

♪ Get her on the Henny,
she gonna turn into... ♪

- You still talk to Tomás?
- Who is that?

♪ b*tches want no
smoke with me ♪

♪ I b*at 'em like they anime ♪

Y'all, we got tired of
paying for these drinks,

so we are brown-bagging it.

- Y'all know Shawna ain't never been in no strip club? Never.
- Yes... No... Yes, I have!

I just have never been to The Office!

She about to get turnt up!

Say it again, Mia. Say it again.

I said we ain't
waitin' in no line.

Bad b*tches don't wait in line.

- Just walk in like that?
- Yeah! Let's go.

Yeah! Hey, Mia, baby!

- Yo, n*gg*s!
- Oh, look at this n*gga here.

What's up? Girl, you keep
popping up like a jackrabbit

- in a box or something, or a Jack in the Box.
- Man, this my spot.

Girl, this our spot. You know
her? You know Shawna?

- I... Yeah...
- Girl, come on!

I didn't know

their whole coochies
was gonna be out like this.

I told her she ain't ever
been to no strip club.

♪ Ass shaker, money maker ♪

♪ k*lling these
hoes, undertaker ♪

♪ I can pop my
p*ssy in Jamaica ♪

♪ But I'd rather just give
him that damn flavor ♪

♪ Tell me where the dollars at ♪

♪ Where the bottles
at? I can show you ♪

♪ What this kitty do,
where the honey at ♪

305! We live!

- And faded! Hey!
- Yeah!

Girl! Ooh! Whatever
happened to, um,

what's his name? Fine n*gga
back in Ms. Rodriguez's class?

- Who?
- Tishawn!

- Man...
- Where he at? That boy was so fine.

- Man, you know he was in jail for armed robbery?
- What?

- Yes, girl, with, like, four kids.
- No!

- Man, what a waste of fine.
- Always be the cute ones.

- Mm-mm-mmm.
- Free him, y'all. We gotta do something.

Put it in the comments.

- Ugh!
- You know what though

What's up?

- I ain't wanna come out with you tonight.
- Why?

Because I felt like... I
felt like after high school,

you just peaced
all the way out...

- No.
- And actin' brand new.

No, that's not how it happened.

Yes, you did.

Like you thought you
was better than everybody.

You thought I thought
I was better than you?

- Yeah.
- Mm-mmm.

- That don't make sense.
- I mean, you stopped hitting me up

after I had Melissa.

Like, I know we...

we got different lives and sh*t,

but I didn't go to college.

My family ain't
come from no money.

I ain't know what I wanted
to be when I grew up.

sh*t just hit me.

I was mad at first.

Then I just
chalked that sh*t up.

Mia, I'm... I'm so sorry.

I didn't mean to
make you feel like that,

and it wasn't like that at all.

If I'm being honest,

I never got my degree.

- Damn. What happened?
- I...

dropped out to work with this...

manipulative producer,

and I thought that he and I
were gonna make it together.

Younger me never thought I
would still be here, back in Florida,

working at the Plymouth,
not doing sh*t. Like...

it's really, really
embarrassing.

You good, girl.

At least you weren't stripping
at The Office like I was.

sh*t, I'd rather have
a piece of degree

than be where I'm at right now.

sh*t, I thought I was
gonna be big, too.

I was gonna be big!

Or married to somebody who was.

Oh sh*t! We still on live
with this fake deep sh*t.

- No... Oh, turn it off.
- Nah, nah, nah!

- Girl, nah! No!
- Turn it off, please. Please...

We gotta turn up.

I haven't heard this since...

♪ Street money ♪

- Ooh! Ooh, ooh, ooh! Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
- Ooh.

- You gotta spit one of your bars for them.
- No.

- Yeah.
- No.

- Man...
- I have to be inspired, Mia.

- Inspired?
- It's a whole... Yeah.

Girl, you need a mask?

- 'Cause I got a durag in the backseat.
- Okay.

What should I rap about?

Girl, you the rapper, your life.

I just told you my
life is trash. Like...

Well, rap about me.

sh*t. Gimme something.

We be back! Ha!

- We back y'all!
- Hello, hello.

Listen, my girlfriend is
spittin' some bars for y'all.

- You ready, Nana?
- Girl, yes. I'm ready. Let's go.

- Let's do it.
- I'm I'm finna turn the instrumental on.

- Play something good. Need a b*at.
- Yeah.

You remember! Okay, okay.

- Just step, so clean...
- Ah! Ah!

- Seduce, and scheme!
- Ah! Ah!

♪ All these n*gg*s in Little
Haiti, they wanna date me ♪

♪ Bougie b*tches, me and
Mia, you gotta pay me ♪

- Seduce and scheme!
- Okay!

Seduce
and scheme! Ah!

♪ I take Visa and PPP ♪

♪ I ain't taking
email, n*gga, CC me ♪

- Seduce and scheme!
- We don't take Discovery, n*gga!

- Declined! Mm!
- Seduce and scheme!

♪ That little bitch,
five-foot-six ♪

♪ Hood Houdini, I turn
a trapper to a trick ♪

- Seduce and scheme!
- Alakazam, n*gga!

- Seduce and scheme!
- Abracadabra!

♪ I'm at the bank with
it, my walk stank with it ♪

♪ I need a charity
the way I stay giving ♪

- Seduce and scheme!
- You know, wait!

- Seduce and scheme!
- Y'all n*gg*s is acting real needy right now.

♪ Bitch, pass the
Henny, her bag is Fendi ♪

♪ Riding with n*gg*s who
don't got gas to gimme ♪

♪ I'ma check the
deuce and leave ♪

♪ You think I like your smile?
n*gga, it's the jewels for me ♪

♪ Straight off the dome,
Mia chose the b*at ♪

♪ And that's the motto we follow
and it's seduce and scheme! ♪

You really came up with that
off the top of your head like that?

Yeah! I'm a rapper!
That sh*t's easy!

Oh my god. You know what?
We should start a rap group.

- Mia, come on.
- Man, y'all, we fittin' to start a rap group,

- and, of course, I'm fittin' to be the pretty hype bitch.
- Come on!

- Look at me.
- How about you be a bitch that tags a hoe?

- That sh*t slap.
- I wanna rap.

- You can rap. You can rap.
- Man! Uh,

Elon Musky! Y'all need to sign my girl!

We going to Mars with this sh*t!

- We back, y'all!
- Hello, hello.

Listen, my girlfriend is
spittin' some bars for y'all.

- You ready, Nana?
- Girl, yes, I'm ready.

Okay, I'm finna
turn the instrumental on.

- Play something good. Need a b*at.
- Yeah.

You remember?

- Okay, okay. Just step, so clean...
- Ah!

- Seduce, and scheme!
- Ah! Ah!

All these n*gg*s...

♪ What? And I get
down with any bitch ♪

♪ He talking like he went ♪

♪ Met somebody in my city ♪

♪ Now bitch f*ckin' with me ♪

♪ You at me on the gram ♪

♪ When you see
me bitch I'm with it ♪

♪ Get some force
up out the n*gga ♪

♪ Run his pockets,
then I'm dipping ♪

♪ You know I'm really with it ♪

♪ When I step I caught a city ♪

♪ And yo n*gga wanna f*ck ♪

♪ I told that n*gga he a duck ♪

♪ And he done gave
me all your money ♪

♪ So I guess you outta luck ♪

♪ Tell this n*gga get yo bitch ♪

♪ Before I'm
battering her sh*t ♪

♪ Man, that hoe ain't
talking bout nuthin' ♪

♪ Oh god, I sat
up in your sh*t ♪

♪ This for you dirty ass hoes
who used to run with me ♪

♪ You sneaking out
the house like a moth ♪

♪ Can't have no company,
your mama took your phone ♪

♪ She curse you out, you
say you trapping though ♪

♪ You know you a
freak, you sucking d*ck ♪

♪ Now why you cappin' hoe,
this for you nappy ass hoes ♪

♪ Who want to front 'em ♪

♪ b*tches talking
sh*t but sucking d*ck ♪

♪ For a bundle, I
let you b*tches talk ♪

♪ But they be
looking for the clout ♪

♪ If you ain't really 'bout it why
you clapping and you loud? ♪

♪ sh*t you with it,
sh*t, I'm with it, sh*t ♪

♪ I'm bumping for real ♪

♪ Man, ya n*gga be talking,
I had to tell him to chill ♪

♪ He be blowing up my phone
and he be telling me sh*t ♪

♪ I know you see
me in his phone ♪

♪ I know you having a fit ♪

♪ You can catch me Alabama,
you can pull up in Cabana ♪

♪ I be posted on your street,
I bet you got this on repeat ♪

♪ I bet you got this on repeat,
I bet you got this on repeat ♪

♪ I bet you got this on repeat,
I bet you got this on repeat! ♪

♪ Yeah! Badass hoes... ♪