04x91 - Role Reversal

[bunniefuu]

[ ♪ ]


Ugh, dreading going to work today.


They've hired a new girl to help with the End Of Season sale.index , start ,…}


She might be nice.


I'm fine with NOT nice,


as long as she's not another squealing clone.


I'm already outnumbered!


[BREATHLESS] Albatro... Albatross....


Finch...


B-Big...


Fire? Big fire?


Sale? Big sale?


They're hosting a Sadie Hawkins dance


here at the mall this Friday.


Who's Sadie Hawkins?


During the w*r of she warned the British


that the Americans were attacking.


That was Laura Secord!


Right! "The Americans are attacking! Who wants chocolate?"


[SCOFFS] A Sadie Hawkins dance


means the girls have to ask the guys out.


Nice. Sweet!


I'm going to ask that cute guy I've been eyeing.


Which one?


You talk about a different guy every hour.


Well, I had to narrow it down from five possibles,


so I did a pros and cons list.


and... I am going to ask Ethan! Eee!


It's refreshing to reverse the roles from time to time.


Ya, asking out girls sucks.


It can be a lot of pressure.


Getting sh*t down.


Humiliated.


Slapped.


It's time women see that doing the asking


is not an easy task.


Well, I'm looking forward to it.


It's not like I'm asking a boy out


because I'm unattractive and desperate.


Wait a second. I've asked out plenty of boys!


Do you think I'm unattractive and desperate?


You're definitely not unattractive...


OR desperate!


[ ♪♪♪ ]


[ ♪ ]


♪ LIFE BEGINS AFTER SCHOOL ♪


♪ THAT'S WHEN WE BEND ALL THE RULES ♪


♪ TIME TO HANG WITH ALL MY FRIENDS ♪


♪ WE LIKE TO BE TOGETHER ♪


♪ IN A PLACE WHERE WE BELONG! ♪


♪ I'M TEEN, STARTING TO FIND MY WAY ♪


♪ GOT A NEW JOB


♪ GONNA START AT THE MALL TODAY ♪


♪ THANK GOD I'M ON MY OWN FOR THE FIRST TIME ♪


[ ♪ ]


♪ I'M TEEN, LIFE IS SWEET ♪


♪ WHEN YOU'RE GROWING UP SO FAST ♪


♪ YOU GOTTA MAKE THE GOOD TIMES LAST ♪


[ ♪ ]


♪ I'M TEEN...


♪ I'M TEEN... ♪ TEEN


[ ♪ ]


♪ GOTTA MAKE THE GOOD TIMES LAST ♪


[ ♪ ]


[ ♪ ]


[ GIGGLING ]


This is Nikki. She works here too...


well, almost.


Oo, a commission -- uh, I mean, customer!


Can you show Jean around?


Sure, this'll be fun.


[UNIMPRESSED] "Eee."


Hi, Ethan! Hi. Whew!


Caitlin. Me... Caitlin.


I should stop waving. I'm right here, heehee.


How are ya, Caitlin?


So anyway, ya. For sure.


Uh-huh. Uh huh.


[VOICEOVER] He's staring at you. Say something!


You probably heard about the Laura Secord dance.


Not Laura Secord. Sorry.


[VOICEOVER] You're crashing and burning!


Hit him with the eyelash flutter NOW!


Uh... are you okay?


Fine! Fine! Fine!


I'm fine!


I'm running late. See ya, Caitlin.


Oh, okay, all right. Bye, Ethan.


Bye. Bye. Bye.


Have you noticed how many girls are checking us out?


Indeed I did.


I guess we're looking pretty good.


Guess we are, bro.


Well, if it's a show they want...


Who are we to deny them us?


Sadie Hawkins rules!


[BORED] And finally sweaters, which means we're done,


and you rejoin the cheerleader squad.


Or we could pretend you're still teaching me stuff


so I don't have to talk to the blonde stooges.



Huh. Looked like you were all getting along when I came in.


I'm only here for two weeks,


no point in going out of my way to not get along with them,


but I'll tell you this...


they shouldn't expect any Christmas cards.


How do you do it?


I mean, the way they laugh, they sound like dolphins. Dolphins!


Exactly!


Huh.


Hey, whosaboo?


Is it raining in Jen town? Just go away, please!


Who pooped in your cereal?


I can't ask out boys, okay?


Getting dumped by Travis has left me feeling like


I'm going to get sh*t down and humiliated


if I even try!


Jen, even if you ask someone who isn't into you,


no one is going to be mean about it. Guys are just --


Hi. I was wondering if you had a date for --


I do. Good luck, though. Buh-bye.


Guys are just as sensitive as women.


So there's nothing to --


GIRLI was wondering if you'd like to --


I have a date and even if I didn't, seriously,


I do have standards.


[ WAILING ]


Man, getting asked out all the time can really get on your nerves.


I don't know how Caitlin and Nikki do it.


Incoming.


She totally checked out your butt!


Just a little somethin' I like to keep in my back pocket.


Heh-heh.


It's kinda weird.


I mean, we're being checked out,


but no one has actually asked us to the dance.


Ya...


it's like we're...


Average! Average!


Okay, just be yourself,


relax...


Hi! Dean. Haha.


Anyway, so dancing, at the dance.


That's coming up soon and I thought --


or should I say WAS thinking.


Past tense, thinking done. Maybe we could --


I already have a date.


Oh... but you were my fifth choice!


Maybe some other time?


My dream?


Well, it sounds silly since I've never been anywhere,


but I want to travel the world.


If you had a ticket to go anywhere in the world,


where would it be?


Peru.


No way! Peru is one of the best places I have ever been.


Are you kidding me right now?


[ CELL RINGS ]


I'll call you later, Jonesy.


You've actually been to Peru?


Oh Nick, you totally gotta go.


Sorry, should I not call you Nick?


Nah, no... it's cool. Ya, ya, call me Nick!


Average huh?


Hahaha! Good luck with that!


Hey, Nikki hung up on me earlier.


You know what that means.


She finds you annoying to talk to?


No, it means she's got some big plan


for how she'll ask me to the dance.


Must be nice to be loved.


C'mon, guys, snap out of it!


The dance is in three days!


If you want to get asked out,


you have to start thinking like a girl,


because all the girls are out there thinking like guys,


and guys don't ask out other guys.


Some guys ask out other --


Not the conversation we're having.


Think LIKE girls. BE the girls!


You wanna give it a sh*t?


[IN GIRLY VOICE] Hi Wyatt, how are you?


Do we have to do the voices?


It'll help us get into the mind-set.


[GIRLY VOICE] I'm fine, Jude. How are you?


Nice! Giggling.


[ ♪ ]


[ GIGGLES ]


It's like we're the prettiest cakes in the window.


So why is no one buying?


I guess they're thinking, Why buy the cake


when you can get the milk for free!


Typical!


I can feel their eyes on my body.


We're not just objects you know!


She's been all over the world,


living the life I wish I had,


and being who I wish I were!


And yet somehow, I still like her!


Hm. Well, how're you two doing?


I can't ask out boys!



I can't even approach them!


Every time I try I talk too fast,


my hands are all over the place and --


I know they'll say no and then I'll feel even worse about myself --


Whoa!


You guys need to stop over thinking it


and just apply the talents you've already got.


Jen, think of it as a sports competition!


I could try that.


Caitlin, you aren't looking for a date,


you're shopping for an accessory for the dance!


I AM the queen of accessorizing.


Thanks, Nikki! Thanks, Nikki.


[ GIRLS GIGGLING ]


If I had your hair I'd show it off. Really?


Oh ya, you've got great shine.


That's 'cause I double condition.


Don't bother, just remember this...


If you want hair so nice, wash once, condition twice.


Hmm. I have to pee.


I'll come with you!


Do either of you own blue tinted contact lenses?


Consider it.


This passport is amazing!


Look at all the places you've been.


I just got a new one, so...


why don't you hang onto that one?


Call ya later, Jonesy.


Are you sure?!


It'll remind you that you gotta live your dream, Nick.


You keep it. Thanks!


She is just so darn cool!


JUDEI think you'd look better in blue.


Not periwinkle, but a muted turquoise --


Wait, why are we peeing in stalls instead of urinals?


Um, dunno.


Are you sitting down? YES!


Ahhhh! Ahhhhh!


Maybe we got a little too much into character, huh?


Wanna talk football or something?


I don't really like football.


Me either, it's just so violent.


We've got to stop this!


So, um, I was wondering if...


um, maybe you wanted to...


Wait! Don't go with her, go with me!


I'm a way better catch.


I'm smarterPenicillin was invented in ,


and the Falkland Islands were first settled by France.


In your face! AND I'm stronger.


Push up contest!


One, Two, Three...


Four, Five, Six...


Awww...


I've looked everywhere,


and I can't find a guy that matches my belt.


Why don't you just go up to a guy and say,


"Will you go to the dance with me?"


Really? Just like that?!


That's all a guy needs to hear, trust me.


Hang on, I'll get your soda.


Will you go the dance with me?


Will YOU go the dance with me?


Sure! Oh! Wayne.


Oh boy. Oh.


You should be excited, blondie.


asking me to the dance was the best decision you've made this lifetime!


[ ♪ ]


So now I'm the only one without a date?


Maybe you didn't hear me clearly.


I'm going with WAYNE!


You could go with Wyatt or Jude.


I still have two days,


it's not last resort time just yet!


Uh, hey, uh, where are the straws, anyway?


Not in the freezer.


Of course not, what was I thinking?


You don't need to freeze straws!


Were you dancing with meat, Wayne?


Are you a meat dancer? A what dancer?


I'm going to leave you two alone.


Enjoy your dance lesson, Wayne.


[ CELL PHONE RINGS ]


Hello?


No, man, still no date.


He'll call you back.


I'm Jen, and you're going to the dance with me.


Was that a question?


No, It wasn't.


Do I have any say in this? Nope.


You can run but you can't hide!


Hey Nikki, going on lunch?


You're running off like you've got a plan.


Ya, I kinda do have a plan for my lunch break, sorry.


Sorry? Don't be silly.


Anything I can do to help this plan of yours?


Oh, could you lend me ten bucks?


If that's all you need to get this plan off the ground,


then sure!


That'll do.



Awesome! I'm stoked about your plan!


Hey Jean, can I buy you lunch?


Sure, Nick, that'd be great.


But... did she just call her Nick?


You're going to the dance with me!


Why can't you just ask me nicely?


Because if I ask you'll say no!


Why would I say no to a beautiful girl asking me out?


You think I'm... beautiful?


Yes.


And obviously very motivated.


Will you go the dance with me?


Yes. Hi, I'm James.


I'm heading back to the Barn.


See ya, Nick.


Catch up with you in a sec.


Who's that, Nick? That's Jean.


The new girl? The one you like so much?


Yaaaa.


She's totally into you!


What?!


It's kinda obvious.


Even I caught that. Yep.


Well, you're all wrong.


Has she given you a gift yet?


Not really.


Unless you count her old passport?


[ GASP! ]


Whoa!


A-haa!


Uh-huh.


Oh, come on.


She gave you a photo of herself!


We're totally right.


Oh-kay.


Say whatever you want, I'm going to work now.


You do realize that prom isn't for another two years and months?


Dude that suit is going to reek.


Nikki hasn't asked me to the dance yet,


so I'm just laying out a little sugar to catch my snake.


Flies. Sugar catches flies.


What catches snakes?


You gotta wear snake traps.


No, you need those metal sticks with the grabber at the end.


My grandmother uses those to get cereal down from her cupboard.


Why are there snakes in your grandmother's cereal?


Caitlin, Wayne alert!


I told Wayne I was coming down with something


and might not be able to go to the dance.


Pretend I've been coughing a lot, 'k?


[ COUGH! ]


Will you stop it with the coughing!


Yer making me crazy with the non-stop coughing!


How was that?


What's in the pot, Wayne?


My grandmother's secret garlic chicken soup.


It cures everything!


I made you a batch so hopefully you can go to the dance.


I'll go find you a spoon.


Wow! He made you soup.


That dude has one big fat heart.


Aw, now there's no way I can get out of this!


Good, 'cause I think he might be 'The One'!


[JONESY LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY]


Look at you go! Nice folding, Nick.


So, um, I guess you got to meet some cool guys


while traveling all over the world, huh?


Ya, totally.


So... any special guy out there pining for you?


Nah.


There must have been one guy,


y'know, somewhere.


Some guy.


Any guy?


Nick, if you are trying to find out if I'm gay,


it's okay to just ask.


What? No, no I was -- it's not like I was --


Yes, I'm into girls.


And I'm really flattered.


But I already have a date for the dance tonight.


Oh! K...


Are we all right? Still friends? Ya, ya.


She's just too darn COOL!


Well, I guess we're going stag tonight? Sure.


The dance will still be fun.


Ennnnh! Sorry, losers.


All guys must be accompanied by a girl to get in.


Sadie Hawkins rules.


Ready for your next lesson, Wayne?


Today is hip hop and Flamenco!


Bro, we gotta find a way into the dance!


Yeah, hey, this is pretty good, isn't it?


Soooo, this is gonna be fun right?


Hey James, you trying to steal my date?


Ha-ha ha ha!


You try that move again, and I'll shave off your eyebrows.


Got it?


Hey. Hi. It's cool.


My girlfriend's inside so...


Seriously, do I look like someone that wasn't asked out?



Hellooo?


Spartans the Dutch?


So Caitlin was talking to herself?


Ya, but Wayne thought she was asking him out,


and she was too nice to tell him the truth.


Ouch!


Have you seen Jonesy?


This is so like him to be late!


You wanna dance? Sure!


Hey, Jean!


Ugh, Jonesy, where are you?


You look really nice tonight.


Uh huh. Ya.


Like that chick in Alien Monkey Feeders . Have you seen it?


Sure. HA! Got you!


There was no Alien Monkey Feeders ! You're a liar!


Just like you lied about wanting to come here with me tonight.


That's right, I know!


SO SO I WON'T EMBARRASS YOU ANYMORE THAN I ALREADY HAVE!


Why are you always the girl?


Delicate bone structure.


Why are you out here?


Nikki never asked me to the dance.


Whoa. Heavy mojo smack-down.


We'll let her know you're out here. No.


Tell her that I hope she's having fun,


and that I went home!


[ ♪ ]


[ ♪ ]


[ ♪♪♪ ]


[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]


Ok, I asked you out by accident.


But you've been really nice. and I've been horrible.


I'm sorry.


Let's start over...


Will you be my date?


Blondie, you just made the best --


And not say things like that.


Deal.


Oh, hi, Ethan. Good to see you.


So, is this your girlfriend?


Nah, Ellen's my cousin.


She's new in town, so I said I'd show her around.


Ellen? Wayne.


You've probably been watching me on the dance floor.


I'm very cool.


Uh, Wayne, what are you doing?


Ignore the blonde.


I only said I'd be her date 'cause I felt sorry for her.


Jonesy totally stood me up!


Wayne just dumped me for another girl!


Ouch.


Aren't you two just sad?


Not as sad as Jonesy.


Seems he couldn't get into the dance because he had no date.


'Cause no one asked him...


Oh no.


Did I never ask him?


AGH!


To the dance floor!


HAH!


Jonesy?


Jonesyyyy?


Jonesy?


Hey. I'm sorry.


I messed up.


It's like breathing in and out, you know,


you take it for granted that the air is just there


but when you go to breathe and it isn't,


it's a pretty big deal.


So..?


So I'm telling you that you're a pretty big deal,


and, well, a really big deal.


You're such a big deal that --


Stop. Just stop!


You had me at "You're a really big deal."


You're such a goof,


a really big goof.


Go big or go home.


May I have this dance?


[ ♪ ]


You were asking me out?


I thought you were having a seizure.


You and me both.


At least you weren't tackled!


Girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.


Whooo!


It is hot out there!


Hey! You found him.


And I see you've made up!


Hey, are you hitting on my lady friend, pal?!


Hahaha! Awesome.


Who'd you come in with?


That'd be me.


Call me!


Hey Jonesy, nice.


Jude! Uh-oh!


I knew those straps were done up wrong.


We better find that fast before...


If anyone wants pizza, it's on me.



I'm in! Nice!


Huh! Heckuva night.


Best Laura Secord dance ever.