Transcripts - Forever Dreaming

- Ahh!

[yelling in Swedish]

I'm not having this!

How's it going, bros?

It's PewDiePie.

You're about to watch me

get the absolute shit
scared out of me.

Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Whoa!

This show takes
what I already do,

getting scared of horror games,

but taking it
to the next level.

Oh, shit.

A really f*cked up level.

- Naughty boy!

- Oh, shit!
What the f*ck?

So if you love watching me
get scared shitless,

you're gonna love
"Scare PewDiePie."

[haunting music]

♪ ♪

[upbeat pop music]

[buzzer sounds]

- Felix.

- Hello?

- Hey, Felix, it's Rach.

Come on out.

- All right. One second.

- We're joined today
by Rachel,

who doesn't trust Damon
or myself...

- Nope.

- To do the sh**t.

- Is that a venomous snake?

- I got to be honest,
I didn't check.

You tell me.
- No, I don't want to go!

- How did she get in there?

- I have no idea.

Go, guys! There's a fire!

Let's go!

- How's it going, bros?

It's PewDiePie.

Well, it's the last game.
I can't believe it.

Awesome journey

filled with terror...

[screaming]

Let me out!

Disgust...

Ew!
Eh!

Betrayal...

- Okay.
- What is this?

A lot of mixed emotions.

I can't trust anymore.
I just can't.

- Uh, I'm sorry that
I couldn't be there for you.

I'm sorry.

- Great.
All right, let's go.

- Let's go.

What can you tell me
about today, then?

You're being very secret today.

- Well...

- There's only one game
left on the list.

- Would you be disappointed
if we weren't playing it?

- No, you know what?

I will tell you, though,

what I will be disappointed in.

If I don't see Timmy again,

I'm gonna be legit pissed.

- That'll do it.
- Good.

- [chuckles]

- [holds low note]

- So when I say Sweden,

what's the first thing
that comes to mind?

- Meatballs.
- Kevin.

- Uh, I think of the blue
and yell--yellow flag.

- Yes.

- And Vikings.

- I think if you
went to Sweden,

you'd probably be
disappointed.

- Why?

- There's no Vikings.
- There's no Vikings.

Are there meatballs?
Is there chocolate?

- There's a serious lack
of meatballs.

No, chocolate is Switzerland.
- Oh, you're right.

- And I'm kind of offended.

- Oh, no!

- At me thinking that?
- Everyone gets that wrong.

- I'm sorry!

- [echoing]
Felix? Is everything okay?

[distorted speech]

How's your coffee?

- [laughing]

- Well, I don't even know
what's going on.

- I'll find you, Felix!

This will not be the end!

- [distorted speech]
Vikings?

[distorted speech]

- Hello, Felix.

- This is PewDiePie.

What up, bros?

- What'd we do
to betray your trust?

- Trapped in the dollhouse.

[intense music]

- PewDiePie.

Now we got to help him
get out.

♪ ♪

First off,
take off your blindfold.

This is gonna be weird.

What am I gonna get today?

Okay!

♪ ♪

I'm crippled!

Help!

Sorry about your legs
no longer working.

They don't want us to leave
the dollhouse.

How did you guys do that?
That's f*ckin' weird.

[laughing]

Oh, a banana.

Safe word.

To escape, we need to conquer
our greatest fears.

The first step to escape

is to read the letter
on your desk out lout.

Okay, I will read the letter
on my desk out loud.

Hello, Felix.
This is PewDiePie.

"We have amnesia."

Oh, shit!

"There are three things
you must do.

"Find the key to escape,

"find the secret phrase,

find yourself."

Okay, here I go.

Yes, can really walk
in these things.

[laughs]
Oh, it's me!

I found myself, guys.

Me and Marzia.

How did you find these pictures?

These are my private pictures,
guys.

Turn right, Felix.

Turn right?
Or am I right?

Okay, here's another.

Go to your left, Felix.

PewDiePie, you crazy, man.

Find the key, Felix.

Where's the key?
I don't--

What?

- Hey!

[knocks on door]

Hello?

Oh, shit.

- No!
[laughs]

Hell no.

Wrong way, sorry, Felix.

What the f*ck?

What the f*ck?

- You opened the wrong door

and you need to be punished.

Elbows on the table!
- I did not sign up for this.

Ah, okay.

- Naughty boy!
- Ah!

What the f*ck?
- Naughty, naughty!

- Okay.
- You get down on the ground.

Crawl around like a dog.

- Eh.

I d--I can't--
Ah!

- Bark like a dog!

- No--ah!
- Bark!

- Ah!
- Bark louder!

- Woof! Ahh!
- Bark like a dog! Bark!

- Bananas!

- Get back over here!
- Bananas!

This is not--
- You are late for dinner!

- This is seriously not cool,
guys.

- Get over here.

- Whoa! Okay.
- Piece of shit!

- Okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

- Get in there!
- Oh, what the f-- piggy!

- I've made three courses
for you.

You have to try all three.
Get over here.

All three!

Now!
- Ah! Okay.

What is this?
- Just eat it!

- I'm not gonna eat it!

Oh, shit.

"The"?

Okay.
Come on, Felix.

We got to find out
what the secret phrase is.

There's nothing in here!

[gasps]
No.

It's in the bottom, of course.

Okay, okay. I'm--
- Hurry it up!

- I'm trying. It's really hard.

"Bro."

Oh, shit,
not the poor little fellas.

Oh, God. I'm sorry, guys.

"The bro lives."
f*ck this.

- Congratulations.

- [muttering]

- Get over there.

Follow him and do
what they say!

[chanting in unison]
One, zero, zero, one...

- What the shit?

What the f*ck is this?

One, zero, zero, one, zero,
zero, zero, one--

All right.

You know I can't sit--
what are you--

why are you doing that?

[chanting in unison]
One, one, zero, zero,

one, one, zero, one, zero, zero,
one, one, zero, one...

- What are we doing?

What the f*ck?

- [raspy breathing]

[tense music]

♪ ♪

- Okay, well,
I think I can do it.

I feel pretty confident.

Yes.

Oh, shit! What the f*ck?

What?

- Okay. Fine.

Okay, there you go.

Are you happy?

Got it.

Yes.

[thunder booms]

- Oh, shit.

Oh, f*ck this.

- [growls]

- Oh, shit! What the f*ck?

God damn it.

Oh. It's gonna suck.

Yes.
That was not me.

♪ ♪

Good party.

Oh, shit.

Mr. Chair!
- Hey, buddy.

- Hey!

I missed you, man.

- How's it going, buddy?

- Yes!
- Come on over. Have a seat.

- Yay!

Okay.
[laughs]

Let's get the f*ck out of here.

- Hold on.
We've got a long ride ahead.

- Where are we going?

- Whoo. Yeah.

- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
- H-h-hold on.

- Mr. Chair,
what have you been smoking?

- We're almost there.

- "Almost there."
We haven't gone anywhere, dude.

- Pewds is out there.
- Thanks, dude.

All right, bro, I feel like
we're almost there.

Whoa!

- [deep voice] Now I need you
to get the hell off of me.

[dramatic music]

- No! Ah!

- [deep voice]
Up the stairs.

- All right,
thanks for the ride, dude.

- [cheerful voice]
All right, buddy.

Time to scoot.
- Bye, my old friend.

- Bye-bye, Pewds. Don't die.

- I'll see you
on the other side.

Okay.

Oh, what the f*ck?

No, f*ck you.

In order to find yourself,

you have to face your fears.

Oh, hell no.

You must move past
the untrusted statues,

if you want to escape.

This is f*cked.

This is well f*cked.

Oh. This is great.

Oh, no!

Oh, shit! f*ck!

f*cking S.

This is f*cked.

Stop mind-f*cking me.

[gasps]
No.

♪ ♪

[children giggling]

[sighs]
Little dolls.

I f*cking hate little dolls.

Don't become one of the dollies
in the dollhouse.

I just need to find myself.

Excuse me, lady.

Hello?

Sorry to wake you up.

Oh, no.

What the f*ck?

I found myself.

Are you f*cking kidding me?
[laughs]

It is, like, % accurate me.

We have the same dress.

The same--
what?

What the f*ck is this?

Hi?

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs]

This is the best.

[laughs]

What do I do?

Come closer, Felix.

It's me.

Is there something there?

- [deep voice booms]

- Ahh!
- Oh, shit!

What the f*ck?
[laughs]

- [deep voice] It's been me
this whole time, Felix.

- This is f*cked.

- I'm going to keep you here
forever, sugar tits.

I'm sending my dark servants

to make sure you never...

- Oh, shit.

I'm PewDiePie.

I don't f*cking know.

I--um--

- No!
- Ahh!

What the f*ck?

[laughter]

Who licked?
Who was licking all the time?

- [laughs]
- Was that you?

- We were making weird--
- I had no idea!

- Licking--you were licking?

- I was licking
through the hole.

- What the f*ck?
You were, like, licking.

- I was just making
weird noises.

- Yes!
- You didn't recognize--

- Yes.
- Ahh.

- You didn't recognize
our beautiful voices.

- You didn't recognize
his tongue?

- No!

Honestly, I had no idea.

I'm so glad it's you guys.
- Yeah.

In this situation,
where you're wearing a dress.

- Dude, this is--
[whip cracks]

Oh, God. No.

Not her.
Oh.

- What's your real safe word,
Felix?

- Bananas?
- No.

Real safe word.
- Please!

I don't know!
- Safe word!

- I don't know it!

- Tell me your real safe word
right now!

- This has gone too far.
Bananas.

- Don't play the f*cking piano!

Give me your safe word!

- This is too far, like,
this is legit safe word-thy.

- This is not over.

You will be seeing me again.

- This show is not--

What are we doing, guys?

Is it over?
- Did he do it?

- Please tell me it's--

[cheers and applause]

This was the last game!

Oh.

- Good job.
- I'm so glad that shit's over.

♪ ♪

I don't know what the f*ck
to call this.

This was the weirdest one
by far.

I just can't believe
I didn't recognize you guys.

- Uh, was it a relief
when you saw them?

What was going through
your mind?

- Yes!
I'm like, "All right,

well, they'll help me
with whatever,"

but no, you just stood there.

- We just stood there
and laughed.

- We--it was funny.

- You know about the girl?

You told me about, like,
weird sex, like, bondage,

or whatever.

She was naked almost.

And had a whip.

Today was definitely
safe word-thy.

Like, before, maybe I didn't
really need it.

Today, I was like,
"What the f*ck?"

She spanked me,
like, times.

- How are you feeling?

- Well, I liked it.

I'm j--
[laughter]

- So explain to them
what you've done

the last three weeks.

What has happened to you?

- I got to find keys
through a bunch of maggots.

This is so f*cking gross.

That smell like shit.

[gags]

- Alive?
- Yes, they were.

And they liked to bite you
as well.

It was very good.
- Lovely.

- I'm a fast runner
when I'm being chased,

I learned that.

Okay, f*ck this.
f*ck this.

f*ck this.

[laughter]

During the military thing,

I got to run through,
like, w*r.

Wah!
[explosions booming]

Ahh!

I've seen some shit, guys.

You can tell.

- Well, you're done.

- Oh, yes!

[cheers and applause]

Yes!
- You did it.

- I want to thank Timmy.

Timmy was the baby doll
that's been through me

through the whole thing.

He died twice in the show.

[somber music]

♪ ♪

Tim.

Okay!

Well, I did it!

I conquered these three weeks
like a boss.

I was never scared

for even a second.

[screaming]

All right, this sucks.

[screaming]

No, no, no!

[screaming]

What the shit?

[screaming]

I'm just so glad it's over.

[laughter]

And as always, bros,

stay awesome.

I feel like I got to go in
for this one.

[mimics expl*si*n]

[dark music]

Can we get the party started?

Nicky's here!

- Get the f*ck off the stage!

[g*nshots]
- What the f*ck?

Seeing myself in the mirror--

that was f*cking weird.

- That guy looked
so much like you.

- When we first came in, like,

we literally thought it was you,
and I was like...

Shit!
- Too bad he died, though.

I wanted to meet him.

- Hey!
- I'm PewDiePie!

- It's PewDiePie!

- You are a beautiful man.

Yes.