04x18 - One for the Road: Part 2
Posted: 10/18/23 09:59
[♪♪♪]
♪ Here we are ♪
♪ Face to face ♪
♪ A couple of silver spoons ♪
♪ Hopin' to find ♪
♪ We're two of a kind ♪
♪ Makin' a go ♪
♪ Makin' it grow ♪
♪ Together ♪
♪ We're gonna find
Our way ♪
♪ Together ♪
♪ Takin' the time
Each day ♪
♪ To learn all about ♪
♪ Those things
You just can't buy ♪
♪ Two silver spoons
Together ♪
♪ You and I ♪
♪ Together ♪
♪ We're gonna find our way ♪
♪ Together ♪
♪ We're gonna find our way ♪
♪ We're gonna find our way ♪
♪ Together ♪
[♪♪♪]
Hey, did you ever
see so much booze in your life?
Wow! What a party, huh?
I can't face my parents
like this.
Are your eyes
bloodshot?
Oh. Well, yes, they are, sir.
They always get like this when
I'm coming down with the flu.
Boy, you guys are amazing.
Where do you get your energy,
out of a bottle?
[LAUGHS]
Well, goodbye, Mr. Stratton.
I want to dance.
Sit down, Greg.
I wanna dance. Come on.
Look, I think we should go.
He's pretty drunk.
Hey, nobody's drunk.
OFFICER:
Police. What's going on here?
We found your son
and some of his friends
drinking in the back
of a parked car.
There must be some mistake.
[♪♪♪]
How was the party?
Fine.
I especially enjoyed
your halftime show
with the policeman.
I'm sorry, Dad.
I guess it's pretty embarrassing
to have your son
dragged in by the cops
in front of those people, huh?
No more embarrassing
than telling your friends
you've been grounded
for two months for drinking.
Now, Dad, don't jump
to conclusions.
I know you may find this
hard to believe,
but I wasn't
drinking tonight.
The cops found you
in the backseat of a convertible
with a blonde in one hand
and a beer in the other.
True or false?
True.
I wasn't drinking it.
I was holding it,
like they do in
beer commercials. Ha, ha.
Honest, Dad.
You weren't
drinking?
Nope.
Not tonight.
What do you mean,
not tonight?
Well, you're not going
to like this,
but, well, last night
I did drink...
But not nearly as much
as the others.
What others?
The other kids at the party.
What party?
I knew you
weren't gonna like this.
Last night Greg and I
snuck out to a party,
and I did a little drinking.
Actually,
I did a lot of drinking.
I got
a little sick too.
The veins in your neck
are starting to pop.
I don't believe this.
Sneaking out, drinking.
What else have you been doing
I don't know about?
Well, there was--
I don't want to hear about it.
Dad, I know it was stupid,
and I'm really sorry.
I'm really sorry too.
Rick, drinking at your age
is illegal. It's dangerous.
Why would you do
a thing like this?
Dad, it was there.
Everyone else was drinking.
And you couldn't say no?
Dad, I couldn't say no.
I would've felt like a wimp.
This is the last thing
I'd expect from you.
Well, like I said,
you're grounded
for two months.
Right.
No TV.
Right.
No stereo.
Stereo?
Right.
Dad, believe me,
I really am sorry.
I am too.
[KNOCK ON WINDOW]
Greg, what are you
doing here?
Well, I was out for a walk
on your roof
and just thought
I'd drop in. Heh.
Look, you have
to leave.
I'm in enough
trouble already.
What are you so uptight about?
The cops let us go.
Yeah, but my dad hasn't.
He's put me in solitary
for the next two months.
Big deal. Mine kicked me
out the front door.
That's awful.
I was lucky.
His first choice
was out
the second-floor window.
Where are you gonna stay?
Well, I was hoping to stay
with this real good friend,
who lives in this great
big house. What do you say?
No, no way.
What am I supposed to do, sack
out in some alley with weirdos?
Seriously, Rick, tell me where
I can go and I'll go there.
Your parents
won't take you back?
Come on.
What about
your relatives?
I haven't got any.
Well, what about some of
your drinking buddies?
You can't rely
on people who drink.
So... You're it.
Greg, my dad knows you drink.
He's never gonna
let you stay here.
[EXHALES]
Here.
Are you kidding?
I've quit for life.
I want you to pour it
down the sink.
What?
You got a Bible?
Yeah. Why?
As of right now,
I swear,
I'm on the wagon,
but I need help,
Rick.
Give me a break, huh?
Talk to your parents...
Please?
Remember when
he was ?
All the bad things
he did were so...
good.
"Dad, I busted
the TV.
Dad, I spray-painted
the cat."
Those kinds of things,
I could handle.
Well, if it makes you
feel any better,
he broke your tennis
racket yesterday.
Hi.
Dad, I need to ask
for kind of a favor.
Rick, you want some advice?
Ask me for favors
on the nights
you don't get arrested.
Dad, it's not for me.
It's for Greg. He's in my room.
Greg?
What's he doing here?
His dad kicked him out tonight.
For doing the same thing
you did?
Mm-hmm.
He needs a place to stay.
He wants to know
if we can help him out.
I don't know.
Aren't we butting in
where we don't belong?
Probably. I'd hate to see
someone kicked out
twice in one night.
So I can tell him
he can stay?
He can stay,
but house rules.
Okay.
How can parents just
bail out on their kids?
Well, we don't know
the whole story.
His parents could be
worried sick about him.
I'm going to call them.
Don't you think it's late
to be calling?
If your son was wandering
the streets, could you sleep?
Hello, Mr. Mitchell?
I'm sorry. I didn't mean
to wake you.
This is Kate Stratton.
I just wanted to let you know
Greg will be spending
the night with us.
What'd he say?
He said, "Good luck."
"And I'm pleased
to announce
that last week's
Monte Carlo night"--
[BALL BOUNCING]
"Last week's Monte Carlo night
raised over $
for the camp fund."
Applause, applause, applause.
RICK:
Hey, all right!
Two points, man.
Seven days in a house
with two grounded teenagers.
How many more days are we
gonna have to put up with this?
Forty-nine.
This is really gonna
hurt me more than it does him.
[DOORBELL CHIMES]
We're having halibut
for dinner,
if that's all right
with you.
Oh, isn't Greg allergic
to seafood?
That's what he told me.
Marie, I know
how you feel about Greg,
but we can't just
turn our backs on him.
I wouldn't turn my back
on him, either.
[DOORBELL CHIMES]
Coming!
Hello, Marie!
Hi, Dexter.
Hi, Dexter.
Hey, Dex.
Did you hire
Bo-Bo the clown?
Bo-Bo the bandit's
is more like it.
That twit wanted bucks.
We still have
to hire somebody.
We promised to entertain the
kids when we present the check.
Well, I have a friend who eats
live snakes for $ .
Never mind. It's taken care of.
I will do it.
I went by this magic shop,
pick up some props
and how-to books.
They are fabulous!
I used to dabble
in magic!
I've been practicing. Aha!
[LAUGHS]
That's not bad.
Ah!
Not bad? That's wonderful!
I think that's a great idea.
Thanks. I'm glad to hear
you say that. Shall we?
Shall we... What?
We've got work
to do, you know--
effects, sleight of hand,
misdirection.
What?
Well, every magician
needs a lovely assistant,
Kate.
I'll do it.
You can't be
the lovely assistant.
You have to be the lovely
master of ceremonies.
Back.
I can do magic tricks.
Can you make Greg disappear?
Here ya go.
All right.
That was hot.
We're in there,
all right.
Dad, it's great you're doing
this camp fund thing.
You have a real sense
of charity,
and the things that go with it,
forgiveness,
leniency--
Nice try, Rick.
You're still grounded.
See? I told you
it wouldn't work.
Hey, what's this?
It's got my name on it.
I ordered it
for you.
A present?
While you're grounded?
Really? What is it?
Just a little something
to help you pass the time.
In a plain
brown wrapper?
I love it already. Ha, ha.
The Facts About Alcoholism.
I called a friend of mine
in Alcoholics Anonymous,
had him send out stuff.
I want you to read it.
[SCOFFS]
Dad, don't you think
you're overreacting?
No, I don't. I'm not gonna be
looking over your shoulder
all your life.
You should know
a few facts about drinking.
A few facts?
You've got lots of time.
Greg, you should
take a look at that too.
Well, I intend to, sir.
Thanks a lot.
Yecch!
I think I'm all right.
I only touched it
for a second.
Wait a minute. You're not
gonna read this stuff?
You just told
my dad you would.
I haven't touched a drink
since being here, have I?
Well, no, but--
Then I don't need these.
"Is drinking jeopardizing
your job or business?"
[SCOFFS]
See? This stuff
isn't for me.
No, but maybe this one is.
"How young people can tell
drinking is a problem."
"Do you lose time
from school
because of
your drinking?"
No, never.
"Does it bother you if somebody
says maybe you drink too much?"
No! And you're really
making me mad.
[♪♪♪]
Glad to see you're catching up
on your reading.
Oh, yeah.
One more pamphlet,
and I'll need to have
my eyes rotated.
Where's Greg?
He went to talk to his dad
about letting him come home.
Hope he has more luck
with his father than Kate did.
So do I.
He said seeing
the way you and I get along
gave him
the courage to try.
You don't give up,
do you?
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
I'll tell you what. I'll drop
the grounding for a few hours
We're giving the check
to the camp tonight.
I thought you might want
to see the presentation.
Can Greg come with us?
You know,
just in case it's boring.
Thanks a lot.
Oh, Dad,
I didn't mean your speech,
I meant the other things,
like...
Well, you know, the--
I'm gonna call Greg now
and see if he can come.
Maybe Marie
will come too...
If I pay her.
Hello, Mr. Mitchell,
this is Rick Stratton.
Could I speak to Greg,
please?
He's not there?
Well,
when did he leave?
He's never been there?
Well, he left here
over an hour ago.
Never mind.
I'm sorry to bother you.
[♪♪♪]
[EDWARD & DEXTER
MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY]
When the curtains open,
I'll step forward and say:
"And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the great Dexterino
will perform his...
sawing my wife in half trick."
He seldom misses.
So why am I in here?
Kate's not ready yet,
and Dexter's gotta rehearse.
Can you hurry it up?
It's packed in here.
Just a second.
Wait a minute.
What are you doing?
You want me to get this right?
Sure do.
I just mopped this floor.
Oh.
Listen,
I can't do this.
Why not?
I don't even like slicing bread.
I love slicing bread.
Let me do it.
[CHUCKLES]
Well, Marie.
Dad, I think I'm gonna
stay home after all.
Why, don't you wanna see me
pull a rabbit out of a hat?
How about pulling
a lady out of a box?
Now, wait a minute.
No. Take her out,
she's a coward.
All right. All right.
What's the matter?
I can't get it.
Let me try.
Aah!
Here, here.
[GRUNTS]
I'll go get a crowbar.
Honey, guess what?
You're going to be my assistant.
I not gonna be
anybody's assistant.
Why not?
How come you're wearing
a raincoat?
It is this stupid costume.
I cannot wear it
in front of people.
Can't be that bad.
Oh, no?
Look at this.
Isn't it awful?
Thank you.
Really, sweetheart,
I think that's
in perfectly good taste.
Don't you, Marie?
Yeah, what there was of it.
Marie, I didn't see you there.
Well, I saw you.
[♪♪♪]
[SIGHS]
Hey there, bud. Heh.
Whoa!
Problem, Greg?
No, just clumsy.
You know me. Heh.
Yeah, I do.
So, how'd it go with your dad?
You know, it was a lot better
than I thought
it would be.
We were talking
like a real family for once.
My dad even hugged me
on my way out.
It was kinda nice.
Gee, that's a real
heartwarming story.
You should tell it
to your dad sometime.
I called him, Greg.
You never got there.
I'll explain that.
Yeah?
Can you explain this?
That would be
a little harder.
Do you think
I'm some kind of idiot?
A -year-old could tell
you've been drinking.
Okay, warden, you caught me.
I surrender.
Go ahead
and put the cuffs on me.
You've got a drinking problem,
Greg.
Making jokes won't change it.
[SCOFFS]
You're right, Rick.
I'm sorry.
I'm stopping tomorrow.
Yeah...
Yeah, sure you are.
I fell off the wagon.
I know I was stupid.
Greg, you're not stupid,
you're sick.
Look, this is getting old
real fast, Stratton.
I may drink, but I
don't have a problem.
I drink for fun.
Sure.
"You drink in the morning?
Hide your liquor?
You drink alone?"
Is that fun?
I know a lot of kids
like that.
So do I.
They're alcoholics too.
Now, look!
I don't need you
to get on my case.
I can get that
from my old man.
Greg, face it.
You can't stop drinking
on your own.
Give me this.
You want me
to lock myself up
just 'cause you read a pamphlet?
Forget it!
Greg, you can't
stay here anymore.
What?
No, you heard me.
If I let you stay here,
you're just gonna keep drinking.
[SCOFFS]
I thought
you were my friend.
Greg,
don't you understand?
I am your friend.
Look, all you've gotta do
is pick up the phone.
Oh, sure, I get it.
You're too good to have some
wino stinkin' up your house?
Well, I'll see you around,
friend!
Greg,
where are you going?
That's my problem,
rich boy.
Yo, how can a person
watch wrestling
with all this fighting
going on?
Greg, wait!
It's nothing, Marie.
Well, for nothing, it sure
sounded like something.
And that door
shouldn't be open.
I'll get it.
Don't worry.
[CAR ENGINE STARTS]
Oh, no!
Greg, stop!
[CRASH]
[RICK GROANS]
Lo-- Oh, God!
GREG:
Go help Rick!
He's hurt!
I'll call an ambulance.
Yeah, hello?
We need a paramedic.
There was a bad accident.
Please, I don't believe this.
So, what do you
want now?
Could I have another glass
of milk?
You pressed my button
for that?
[SCOFFS]
Hi.
Oh, my God.
Rick...
Are you all right?
I'm okay, really, Dad.
If it weren't for the sprain,
concussion, and stitches,
I'd feel great.
Marie said you tried to stop
Greg from taking my car.
He was drunk.
I couldn't let him drive.
So you let him
back over you?
It was an accident.
When I get my hands
on that kid--
Dad.
He's an alcoholic.
He didn't know
what he was doing.
Son, there is no excuse
for what he did.
Excuse me.
You, out!
[CLEARS THROAT]
Edward, this is a hospital.
[WHISPERING GRUFFLY]
You, out!
I know I'm not
wanted around here,
but, please, can I
talk to Rick for a second?
You don't think
you've done enough?
Dad, it's okay.
We'll be right out
in the hall, son.
Bet the chicks really go for
that outfit, huh?
What do you want
from me, Greg?
I came to say I'm sorry, Rick.
I really hope we can
still be friends.
What do you say?
I say forget it.
Rick--
You know, I trusted you.
You let me down.
You're right. I did.
You don't need friends.
You don't even want friends.
Can't argue with that.
Stop agreeing with me.
It's really annoying.
You're right.
I'll stop.
Greg, you can do whatever
you want 'cause I don't care.
Just don't bug me
anymore.
Hi.
How are you doing?
Okay, I guess.
Excuse me. Hello?
I'm the patient.
I guess you didn't
notice me.
I'm being very brave
about the pain.
Oh. Well, Greg is a friend.
It's all right.
I was going to tell him
as soon as he stopped
yelling at me.
Wendy's the ward nurse
for the CDC.
What's that?
The Chemical Dependency Center.
I'm checking myself in.
I know it's not gonna
solve everything,
but at least it's a start.
Is he serious?
Yes, he is.
Greg, we have
to be getting back now.
Just a second.
You know, I always had
these really good reasons
for drinking,
like moving around
all the time
and my dad acting
like such a creep,
but I saw what I did
to you tonight,
Rick, and, well...
Greg, your parents
are downstairs.
We really should get started
on the paperwork.
Yeah, okay.
I'm sorry I laid you up
like this, Rick.
If there's any way
I can make it up to you...
Really.
You could take driving lessons.
You guys aren't gonna
believe this.
Greg checked into
a treatment center.
He did?
Yeah, just now.
Well,
that's good news.
That's wonderful.
I'm sure you feel
a lot better.
I'll tell you what would
really make me feel better--
Getting Greg
to trade nurses.
I heard that.
[♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪]
♪ Here we are ♪
♪ Face to face ♪
♪ A couple of silver spoons ♪
♪ Hopin' to find ♪
♪ We're two of a kind ♪
♪ Makin' a go ♪
♪ Makin' it grow ♪
♪ Together ♪
♪ We're gonna find
Our way ♪
♪ Together ♪
♪ Takin' the time
Each day ♪
♪ To learn all about ♪
♪ Those things
You just can't buy ♪
♪ Two silver spoons
Together ♪
♪ You and I ♪
♪ Together ♪
♪ We're gonna find our way ♪
♪ Together ♪
♪ We're gonna find our way ♪
♪ We're gonna find our way ♪
♪ Together ♪
[♪♪♪]
Hey, did you ever
see so much booze in your life?
Wow! What a party, huh?
I can't face my parents
like this.
Are your eyes
bloodshot?
Oh. Well, yes, they are, sir.
They always get like this when
I'm coming down with the flu.
Boy, you guys are amazing.
Where do you get your energy,
out of a bottle?
[LAUGHS]
Well, goodbye, Mr. Stratton.
I want to dance.
Sit down, Greg.
I wanna dance. Come on.
Look, I think we should go.
He's pretty drunk.
Hey, nobody's drunk.
OFFICER:
Police. What's going on here?
We found your son
and some of his friends
drinking in the back
of a parked car.
There must be some mistake.
[♪♪♪]
How was the party?
Fine.
I especially enjoyed
your halftime show
with the policeman.
I'm sorry, Dad.
I guess it's pretty embarrassing
to have your son
dragged in by the cops
in front of those people, huh?
No more embarrassing
than telling your friends
you've been grounded
for two months for drinking.
Now, Dad, don't jump
to conclusions.
I know you may find this
hard to believe,
but I wasn't
drinking tonight.
The cops found you
in the backseat of a convertible
with a blonde in one hand
and a beer in the other.
True or false?
True.
I wasn't drinking it.
I was holding it,
like they do in
beer commercials. Ha, ha.
Honest, Dad.
You weren't
drinking?
Nope.
Not tonight.
What do you mean,
not tonight?
Well, you're not going
to like this,
but, well, last night
I did drink...
But not nearly as much
as the others.
What others?
The other kids at the party.
What party?
I knew you
weren't gonna like this.
Last night Greg and I
snuck out to a party,
and I did a little drinking.
Actually,
I did a lot of drinking.
I got
a little sick too.
The veins in your neck
are starting to pop.
I don't believe this.
Sneaking out, drinking.
What else have you been doing
I don't know about?
Well, there was--
I don't want to hear about it.
Dad, I know it was stupid,
and I'm really sorry.
I'm really sorry too.
Rick, drinking at your age
is illegal. It's dangerous.
Why would you do
a thing like this?
Dad, it was there.
Everyone else was drinking.
And you couldn't say no?
Dad, I couldn't say no.
I would've felt like a wimp.
This is the last thing
I'd expect from you.
Well, like I said,
you're grounded
for two months.
Right.
No TV.
Right.
No stereo.
Stereo?
Right.
Dad, believe me,
I really am sorry.
I am too.
[KNOCK ON WINDOW]
Greg, what are you
doing here?
Well, I was out for a walk
on your roof
and just thought
I'd drop in. Heh.
Look, you have
to leave.
I'm in enough
trouble already.
What are you so uptight about?
The cops let us go.
Yeah, but my dad hasn't.
He's put me in solitary
for the next two months.
Big deal. Mine kicked me
out the front door.
That's awful.
I was lucky.
His first choice
was out
the second-floor window.
Where are you gonna stay?
Well, I was hoping to stay
with this real good friend,
who lives in this great
big house. What do you say?
No, no way.
What am I supposed to do, sack
out in some alley with weirdos?
Seriously, Rick, tell me where
I can go and I'll go there.
Your parents
won't take you back?
Come on.
What about
your relatives?
I haven't got any.
Well, what about some of
your drinking buddies?
You can't rely
on people who drink.
So... You're it.
Greg, my dad knows you drink.
He's never gonna
let you stay here.
[EXHALES]
Here.
Are you kidding?
I've quit for life.
I want you to pour it
down the sink.
What?
You got a Bible?
Yeah. Why?
As of right now,
I swear,
I'm on the wagon,
but I need help,
Rick.
Give me a break, huh?
Talk to your parents...
Please?
Remember when
he was ?
All the bad things
he did were so...
good.
"Dad, I busted
the TV.
Dad, I spray-painted
the cat."
Those kinds of things,
I could handle.
Well, if it makes you
feel any better,
he broke your tennis
racket yesterday.
Hi.
Dad, I need to ask
for kind of a favor.
Rick, you want some advice?
Ask me for favors
on the nights
you don't get arrested.
Dad, it's not for me.
It's for Greg. He's in my room.
Greg?
What's he doing here?
His dad kicked him out tonight.
For doing the same thing
you did?
Mm-hmm.
He needs a place to stay.
He wants to know
if we can help him out.
I don't know.
Aren't we butting in
where we don't belong?
Probably. I'd hate to see
someone kicked out
twice in one night.
So I can tell him
he can stay?
He can stay,
but house rules.
Okay.
How can parents just
bail out on their kids?
Well, we don't know
the whole story.
His parents could be
worried sick about him.
I'm going to call them.
Don't you think it's late
to be calling?
If your son was wandering
the streets, could you sleep?
Hello, Mr. Mitchell?
I'm sorry. I didn't mean
to wake you.
This is Kate Stratton.
I just wanted to let you know
Greg will be spending
the night with us.
What'd he say?
He said, "Good luck."
"And I'm pleased
to announce
that last week's
Monte Carlo night"--
[BALL BOUNCING]
"Last week's Monte Carlo night
raised over $
for the camp fund."
Applause, applause, applause.
RICK:
Hey, all right!
Two points, man.
Seven days in a house
with two grounded teenagers.
How many more days are we
gonna have to put up with this?
Forty-nine.
This is really gonna
hurt me more than it does him.
[DOORBELL CHIMES]
We're having halibut
for dinner,
if that's all right
with you.
Oh, isn't Greg allergic
to seafood?
That's what he told me.
Marie, I know
how you feel about Greg,
but we can't just
turn our backs on him.
I wouldn't turn my back
on him, either.
[DOORBELL CHIMES]
Coming!
Hello, Marie!
Hi, Dexter.
Hi, Dexter.
Hey, Dex.
Did you hire
Bo-Bo the clown?
Bo-Bo the bandit's
is more like it.
That twit wanted bucks.
We still have
to hire somebody.
We promised to entertain the
kids when we present the check.
Well, I have a friend who eats
live snakes for $ .
Never mind. It's taken care of.
I will do it.
I went by this magic shop,
pick up some props
and how-to books.
They are fabulous!
I used to dabble
in magic!
I've been practicing. Aha!
[LAUGHS]
That's not bad.
Ah!
Not bad? That's wonderful!
I think that's a great idea.
Thanks. I'm glad to hear
you say that. Shall we?
Shall we... What?
We've got work
to do, you know--
effects, sleight of hand,
misdirection.
What?
Well, every magician
needs a lovely assistant,
Kate.
I'll do it.
You can't be
the lovely assistant.
You have to be the lovely
master of ceremonies.
Back.
I can do magic tricks.
Can you make Greg disappear?
Here ya go.
All right.
That was hot.
We're in there,
all right.
Dad, it's great you're doing
this camp fund thing.
You have a real sense
of charity,
and the things that go with it,
forgiveness,
leniency--
Nice try, Rick.
You're still grounded.
See? I told you
it wouldn't work.
Hey, what's this?
It's got my name on it.
I ordered it
for you.
A present?
While you're grounded?
Really? What is it?
Just a little something
to help you pass the time.
In a plain
brown wrapper?
I love it already. Ha, ha.
The Facts About Alcoholism.
I called a friend of mine
in Alcoholics Anonymous,
had him send out stuff.
I want you to read it.
[SCOFFS]
Dad, don't you think
you're overreacting?
No, I don't. I'm not gonna be
looking over your shoulder
all your life.
You should know
a few facts about drinking.
A few facts?
You've got lots of time.
Greg, you should
take a look at that too.
Well, I intend to, sir.
Thanks a lot.
Yecch!
I think I'm all right.
I only touched it
for a second.
Wait a minute. You're not
gonna read this stuff?
You just told
my dad you would.
I haven't touched a drink
since being here, have I?
Well, no, but--
Then I don't need these.
"Is drinking jeopardizing
your job or business?"
[SCOFFS]
See? This stuff
isn't for me.
No, but maybe this one is.
"How young people can tell
drinking is a problem."
"Do you lose time
from school
because of
your drinking?"
No, never.
"Does it bother you if somebody
says maybe you drink too much?"
No! And you're really
making me mad.
[♪♪♪]
Glad to see you're catching up
on your reading.
Oh, yeah.
One more pamphlet,
and I'll need to have
my eyes rotated.
Where's Greg?
He went to talk to his dad
about letting him come home.
Hope he has more luck
with his father than Kate did.
So do I.
He said seeing
the way you and I get along
gave him
the courage to try.
You don't give up,
do you?
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
I'll tell you what. I'll drop
the grounding for a few hours
We're giving the check
to the camp tonight.
I thought you might want
to see the presentation.
Can Greg come with us?
You know,
just in case it's boring.
Thanks a lot.
Oh, Dad,
I didn't mean your speech,
I meant the other things,
like...
Well, you know, the--
I'm gonna call Greg now
and see if he can come.
Maybe Marie
will come too...
If I pay her.
Hello, Mr. Mitchell,
this is Rick Stratton.
Could I speak to Greg,
please?
He's not there?
Well,
when did he leave?
He's never been there?
Well, he left here
over an hour ago.
Never mind.
I'm sorry to bother you.
[♪♪♪]
[EDWARD & DEXTER
MUTTERING INDISTINCTLY]
When the curtains open,
I'll step forward and say:
"And now, ladies and gentlemen,
the great Dexterino
will perform his...
sawing my wife in half trick."
He seldom misses.
So why am I in here?
Kate's not ready yet,
and Dexter's gotta rehearse.
Can you hurry it up?
It's packed in here.
Just a second.
Wait a minute.
What are you doing?
You want me to get this right?
Sure do.
I just mopped this floor.
Oh.
Listen,
I can't do this.
Why not?
I don't even like slicing bread.
I love slicing bread.
Let me do it.
[CHUCKLES]
Well, Marie.
Dad, I think I'm gonna
stay home after all.
Why, don't you wanna see me
pull a rabbit out of a hat?
How about pulling
a lady out of a box?
Now, wait a minute.
No. Take her out,
she's a coward.
All right. All right.
What's the matter?
I can't get it.
Let me try.
Aah!
Here, here.
[GRUNTS]
I'll go get a crowbar.
Honey, guess what?
You're going to be my assistant.
I not gonna be
anybody's assistant.
Why not?
How come you're wearing
a raincoat?
It is this stupid costume.
I cannot wear it
in front of people.
Can't be that bad.
Oh, no?
Look at this.
Isn't it awful?
Thank you.
Really, sweetheart,
I think that's
in perfectly good taste.
Don't you, Marie?
Yeah, what there was of it.
Marie, I didn't see you there.
Well, I saw you.
[♪♪♪]
[SIGHS]
Hey there, bud. Heh.
Whoa!
Problem, Greg?
No, just clumsy.
You know me. Heh.
Yeah, I do.
So, how'd it go with your dad?
You know, it was a lot better
than I thought
it would be.
We were talking
like a real family for once.
My dad even hugged me
on my way out.
It was kinda nice.
Gee, that's a real
heartwarming story.
You should tell it
to your dad sometime.
I called him, Greg.
You never got there.
I'll explain that.
Yeah?
Can you explain this?
That would be
a little harder.
Do you think
I'm some kind of idiot?
A -year-old could tell
you've been drinking.
Okay, warden, you caught me.
I surrender.
Go ahead
and put the cuffs on me.
You've got a drinking problem,
Greg.
Making jokes won't change it.
[SCOFFS]
You're right, Rick.
I'm sorry.
I'm stopping tomorrow.
Yeah...
Yeah, sure you are.
I fell off the wagon.
I know I was stupid.
Greg, you're not stupid,
you're sick.
Look, this is getting old
real fast, Stratton.
I may drink, but I
don't have a problem.
I drink for fun.
Sure.
"You drink in the morning?
Hide your liquor?
You drink alone?"
Is that fun?
I know a lot of kids
like that.
So do I.
They're alcoholics too.
Now, look!
I don't need you
to get on my case.
I can get that
from my old man.
Greg, face it.
You can't stop drinking
on your own.
Give me this.
You want me
to lock myself up
just 'cause you read a pamphlet?
Forget it!
Greg, you can't
stay here anymore.
What?
No, you heard me.
If I let you stay here,
you're just gonna keep drinking.
[SCOFFS]
I thought
you were my friend.
Greg,
don't you understand?
I am your friend.
Look, all you've gotta do
is pick up the phone.
Oh, sure, I get it.
You're too good to have some
wino stinkin' up your house?
Well, I'll see you around,
friend!
Greg,
where are you going?
That's my problem,
rich boy.
Yo, how can a person
watch wrestling
with all this fighting
going on?
Greg, wait!
It's nothing, Marie.
Well, for nothing, it sure
sounded like something.
And that door
shouldn't be open.
I'll get it.
Don't worry.
[CAR ENGINE STARTS]
Oh, no!
Greg, stop!
[CRASH]
[RICK GROANS]
Lo-- Oh, God!
GREG:
Go help Rick!
He's hurt!
I'll call an ambulance.
Yeah, hello?
We need a paramedic.
There was a bad accident.
Please, I don't believe this.
So, what do you
want now?
Could I have another glass
of milk?
You pressed my button
for that?
[SCOFFS]
Hi.
Oh, my God.
Rick...
Are you all right?
I'm okay, really, Dad.
If it weren't for the sprain,
concussion, and stitches,
I'd feel great.
Marie said you tried to stop
Greg from taking my car.
He was drunk.
I couldn't let him drive.
So you let him
back over you?
It was an accident.
When I get my hands
on that kid--
Dad.
He's an alcoholic.
He didn't know
what he was doing.
Son, there is no excuse
for what he did.
Excuse me.
You, out!
[CLEARS THROAT]
Edward, this is a hospital.
[WHISPERING GRUFFLY]
You, out!
I know I'm not
wanted around here,
but, please, can I
talk to Rick for a second?
You don't think
you've done enough?
Dad, it's okay.
We'll be right out
in the hall, son.
Bet the chicks really go for
that outfit, huh?
What do you want
from me, Greg?
I came to say I'm sorry, Rick.
I really hope we can
still be friends.
What do you say?
I say forget it.
Rick--
You know, I trusted you.
You let me down.
You're right. I did.
You don't need friends.
You don't even want friends.
Can't argue with that.
Stop agreeing with me.
It's really annoying.
You're right.
I'll stop.
Greg, you can do whatever
you want 'cause I don't care.
Just don't bug me
anymore.
Hi.
How are you doing?
Okay, I guess.
Excuse me. Hello?
I'm the patient.
I guess you didn't
notice me.
I'm being very brave
about the pain.
Oh. Well, Greg is a friend.
It's all right.
I was going to tell him
as soon as he stopped
yelling at me.
Wendy's the ward nurse
for the CDC.
What's that?
The Chemical Dependency Center.
I'm checking myself in.
I know it's not gonna
solve everything,
but at least it's a start.
Is he serious?
Yes, he is.
Greg, we have
to be getting back now.
Just a second.
You know, I always had
these really good reasons
for drinking,
like moving around
all the time
and my dad acting
like such a creep,
but I saw what I did
to you tonight,
Rick, and, well...
Greg, your parents
are downstairs.
We really should get started
on the paperwork.
Yeah, okay.
I'm sorry I laid you up
like this, Rick.
If there's any way
I can make it up to you...
Really.
You could take driving lessons.
You guys aren't gonna
believe this.
Greg checked into
a treatment center.
He did?
Yeah, just now.
Well,
that's good news.
That's wonderful.
I'm sure you feel
a lot better.
I'll tell you what would
really make me feel better--
Getting Greg
to trade nurses.
I heard that.
[♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪]