[KUROKA] I only sent
a fraction of my chi out,
and yet you still came running.
I'm glad you can still
feel our sisterly bond.
What do you want?
My time is precious,
so spill it.
[KUROKA] There's no
need to be rude, honey!
I just heard it
through the grapevine
that a big party was going down.
It caught my interest
but you know what they
say about curiosity and cats.
This isn't like Koneko!
Then again,
girl's been actin' weird.
[RIAS] She's really been
pushing herself lately
and having to come to grips
with some personal issues.
[RIAS]
How are you feeling?
[KONEKO]
Useless.
[RIAS] Well, you're
not one to give up,
so I'm sure you'll be fighting
at full strength very soon.
I hate missing out on training.
We all know that, but the
training would be worthless
if you're not healthy enough
to get something from it.
[KONEKO] It's hard to watch
how strong Kiba, Xenovia,
and Akeno have become.
Even that lazy horn dog
has made progress.
Meanwhile, I feel left
further and further behind.
Gasper's even gotten
more powerful lately,
and I don't have
Asia's power to heal people,
so what's left for me?
Be fair. You'll improve too.
Yeah, unless things
continue like this.
Then, I'll just be obsolete.
How can a rook
be the weakest?
I'm pathetic.
I'd never forgive myself
if I held you back.
[RIAS gasps]
[KONEKO] But I don't want to
have to use my nekomata powers
to catch up.
I'm so afraid to use them.
Afraid to be like her.
I won't!
I refuse to let
that happen again.
[ISSEI] I had no idea.
That sucks balls.
Sadly, Koneko will have
to overcome by herself.
We all have struggles
we must face alone.
[ASIA] I haven't seen Issei in
a while. I wonder where he is.
[XENOVIA]
Now that you mention it,
Rias seems to
be missing as well.
Ah. Please escort
them in, Barkiel.
[gasps]
[AZAZEL] Y'know,
for a crotchety old bastard
from the Northern wastes,
you're not looking too bad.
[ODIN] I like what your
husband's done with your hair.
[SIR ZECHS]
Charming.
It's been too long, Lord Odin.
How we've missed your
casually h*m* banter.
[ODIN]
Greetings, Sir Zechs.
and let me thank you
personally for your invitation.
Lord Odin,
mighty God of the North;
you honor us with this visit.
I expected more
from you, Leviathan.
Huh?
A pretty young
thing such as yourself
shouldn't be in
drab clothing like that.
This is a party, isn't it?
Good point!
Mirurun mirumiru spiral!
Oh my. What the
hell just happened?
[LEVIATHAN] Well, have you been
living in a cave or something?
This is a magical girl outfit;
they're totes the rage.
Love it.
How'd you like to
stroke Odin's beard?
Please keep in mind why
we made the voyage, milord.
You're here
representing Valhalla!
Must you always be
the downer in the room?
It's that kind of
attitude that keeps you
from getting a
hero for yourself.
[gasps]
[cries]
I may be just an ugly Valkyrie
who's never had a man,
but at least I won't die alone
what with living
in the underworld.
[ODIN]
Sorry about her.
This ball of neuroses
is named Rossweisse.
My highly capable,
but depressing, assistant.
That's why she can't find a man.
[MICHAEL] Allow me to apologize
for keeping you waiting.
Odin, All-father of the Norse!
Looking as hale and hearty
as ever, Your Excellency.
[XENOVIA]
Irina!
[AKENO] Did she come as
part of Michael's entourage?
[ASIA] Who'd figure we'd run
into her in the underworld?
[KONEKO] So, like, what
are you doing here, Kuroka?
[KUROKA]
Seriously?
I came back for you, Shirone.
When things went south,
I had to drop
everything and run.
I couldn't take you with me.
[RIAS]
Kuroka.
[ISSEI]
Yeah.
I had a feeling that Koneko
knew that weirdo cat-lady.
[RIAS]
They're sisters.
Hey-oh! Kitty-cat!
It's the Chaos Brigade!
[KUROKA]
What is it, Bikou?
[BIKOU] Two rats are
veiled in the shadows.
You perceived them, yes?
With our mastery
of the sage arts,
we can easily detect interlopers
by the mere flow of their chi.
Rias, you're here, and pervy?
Kuroka. Koneko is a
member of my household,
and we Gremorys always
look out for our own.
[KUROKA] Your household?
Like that matters.
She and I are sisters,
first and foremost.
I'm not going to give her to you
just because you "deign it."
[ISSEI]
Hey, monkey d*ck!
How's my buddy Vali doing?
[BIKOU chuckles]
He's fine.
[KUROKA]
Who's the brat?
That cretin is the
Red Dragon Emperor.
[KUROKA] Oh! So he's
the super titty freak
that made Vali
run for the hills.
Damn right! Though I consider
myself more a connoisseur.
I still don't get
what you want.
I wanted to invite you to
join Orphis and Vali and me.
After all, cutie
pie, as my sister,
you have the same
k*ller power in your blood.
I won't leave.
I've found my place as
a part of Rias's family!
Koneko's one of us, and we're
not just gonna hand her over.
I guess we'll just have
to take her from you then.
[BIKOU] Personally, I'm
excited you intend to resist.
I can't imagine a finer way
to consume some time.
Why would they
want to take up time?
[SIR ZECHS] Devils, gods, and
fallen angels have seen the
lessons of the past, and chosen
to live together in peace.
But the Chaos Brigade chooses
to fan the flames of w*r...
[BIKOU] We decided to k*ll
two birds with one stone,
as the saying goes, and thus
lured your female friend out.
Vali ordered us to
escort a certain VIP
to your quaint
diplomatic congregation.
[SIR ZECHS]
Lord Odin.
if there are no objections,
please sign the pact monument.
Of course.
[KUROKA] Apparently,
he had a couple issues
with tonight's get-together.
[LOKI]
Objection!
I'm surprised
he waited this long.
[ODIN]
You arrogant fool.
I am the Norse god,
Loki. Greetings.
All right!
Now we got a party!
[SIR ZECHS] Lord Loki, you may
be the Norse god of mischief,
but that gives you no right
to cause problems here.
[LOKI] Seeing Odin,
our great All-Father mingling
with lesser
mythologies causes me
to suffer indescribable
torment, Sir Zechs.
Leave, Loki. If you return
to Valhalla immediately,
I'll forgive you for
this public affront.
Really? You can
shove your forgiveness.
Oh great, another
man without manners!
[LOKI] If he chooses
to sign an alliance
with the other mythologies,
it will make things
incredibly difficult for me
to set Ragnarok into motion!
The lyrics are different
but the song sounds the same.
Look kid, you're just a clown
working for the Chaos Brigade.
[LOKI] Working for? No.
Working with? Yes.
But I admit this
op was my idea.
Now, let me introduce
you to my beloved son!
Something's gone wrong!
The council is under att*ck!
Heh!
Huh?! That can't be good.
[KUROKA]
You're right.
It's a little barrier
I put on the forest
to keep us all trapped
together for a bit.
[BIKOU]
Okay, Red Dragon Emperor.
Show me your power!
[ISSEI thinking] These
guys aren't jerking around!
[TANNIN]
Would you mind if I cut in?
[ISSEI]
Hell yeah! Tannin's here!
[DDRAIG] He must have followed
my power's energy signature.
[TANNIN]
That's right.
You emit enough power
to make tracking simple.
Plus there was something about
Issei that was bothering me.
[ISSEI]
Might wanna get used to that.
[BIKOU]
The previous dragon king?
Oh, you've piqued my interest!
Go ahead, monkey.
You know you wanna.
Flying Nimbus!
Extend! Ruyi Bang!
[laughs]
I haven't had this
much fun in ages!
Look at him go!
His firepower is way
amped up compared
to what he whipped out
while we were training!
Ha! Son Goku!
This is proving to
be quite entertaining!
[KUROKA] The monkey king
and a dragon.
They're gonna have a blast.
Now then, are you gonna hand
over my baby sister or not?
That a "no"?
Fine. Guess I gotta k*ll ya.
[TANNIN]
Kids! I have a plan!
While I slap this monkey around,
you guys pound that p*ssy!
Are you the Red Dragon
and his master or not?
Dude, it's a bit more
complicated than that!
[RIAS thinking]
Kuroka is a major thr*at,
but I don't want to fight
her in front of Koneko.
[KONEKO]
Just stop!
Look, it's fine;
I'll come with you.
[ISSEI]
Shut your whore mouth!
[RIAS]
You don't get to do that!
But first, you have to let
my friends leave unharmed.
No, ma'am!
You are my servant,
retainer of my household,
and my friend!
Leaving me is not an option.
[KONEKO]
My sister is too strong.
I know what she can
do better than anyone.
[RIAS]
Don't worry.
To protect you, I'll fight
her with everything I've got.
[KUROKA]
Haha. Oh please.
I understand Shirone's
true potential better
than a bitch like
you ever could.
Now c'mere, babe.
I'll show you how to
kick ass "sage art" style.
No, I don't need
that power, not ever.
I don't want my strength to
come from other people's pain!
Kuroka!
Do you not understand
how much you hurt your sister
when you chose to
drown in your own power
and leave her behind?
When you ran away after
murdering your master,
this brave girl saw hell.
When I first met her,
having feelings was a
luxury she couldn't afford.
[roars]
[RIAS] Koneko had
been abandoned by you,
betrayed by the only person
she thought she could trust.
And when the other
devils despised her,
tried with all their might
to bully her into leaving,
she was completely alone.
You've lost the right
to demand anything of her.
Rias, thank you.
That's the reason I've
always tried to show her
the finest things
life has to offer.
I'm going to stay,
so, leave Kuroka.
I don't want to go
with you, all right?
é\My name is Koneko Tojo.
I'm choosing to live
my life with my master,
and that's final!
It seems she's decided
to stay on as my rook,
where she's loved,
because we treasure
family in my house.
I will never allow you to lay
so much as a finger on her!
[ISSEI thinking]
So cool!
That speech inspired me
into a full on chubby!
You'll have to go through me
to get to these hot ladies!
Issei.
[KUROKA] Hmph! Even though you
know there's no way you'll win?
What an idiot.
It's go time.
Hey. What the fog?
Wait, what's
wrong with you two?
[KUROKA] My magic mist
is wicked effective
against devils
and spirits and such.
Shocking, it doesn't work
so well on dragons, though.
[ISSEI]
You bitch!
[KUROKA] I watered
down the poison,
so they won't be
k*lled any time soon.
Plus, it's a lot more fun
to watch them die slowly.
[roars]
[grunts]
[BARKIEL]
This girl is off-limits, pup.
Oh look, a hero.
[gasps]
[AJUKA]
You left yourself open.
[LOKI]
Beelzebub?
[SIR ZECHS]
Well played.
Are you hurt Akeno?
[gasps]
Impressive att*ck,
but still useless.
Boosted Gear, go!
[ISSEI]
Huh?! Oh, come on!
[TANNIN]
As I thought.
Yo, gramps!
What's goin' on here?
[DDRAIG] This is the result
of your training with Tannin.
You'll have to decide
if you want to power up
or to Balance Break.
So are you telling me
I might be able
to do a Balance
Breaker right now?
[DDRAIG]
Yes.
But you won't be able
to kick out the jams
using your Balance Breaker
without a radical catalyst.
[ISSEI]
Radical catfish?
[DDRAIG]
The rest is up to you, boy.
[ISSEI]
Oh, great.
Hey, just telling me that
doesn't make me know
what I'm supposed
to do all of a sudden.
How lame.
The mighty
Red Dragon Emperor will die
without ever activating
his Sacred Gear?
He doesn't have the balls!
[gasps]
[RIAS]
Issei!
[ISSEI]
Don't move, Rias!
If you do,
the poison's gonna spread.
Issei, please, stop.
If you keep this up,
she's going to k*ll you!
[KUROKA]
I don't get it.
Why does Vali have
a rage boner for this kid?
How could he make
anyone retreat from anything?
[ISSEI thinking] Damn!
This is how it always goes.
When I helped Asia,
or when I saved Rias.
In the end, I crap out.
I'm a failure.
I don't deserve anything!
I let Asia die once.
I made Rias cry once.
If I can't save them
the first time around,
then what kind of
legendary dragon am I?
Issei, no!
[ISSEI thinking]
Why can't I unleash my power
unless someone gets hurt?
It's so frustrating
because all I want
to do is protect them!
[ISSEI] I don't really care
if you're her sister or not.
You made Koneko cry,
and that's the kind of
bullshit I just can't handle!
[KUROKA] Now I really
feel bad for Shirone.
Some mud covered
Lancelot-wannabe loser
is enough to creep any girl out.
It makes my skin crawl.
Issei is my friend.
Maybe she's right.
Even though I've got a
legendary dragon's power in me,
I can't do a damned thing.
Talk about a disappointment.
I must be the most useless,
talentless devil of all time.
[KONEKO]
Throughout history,
most Red Dragon
Emperors get obsessed
with their power and wind up
going completely insane.
It seems my sister
has followed their lead.
Sure, they have power,
but they've lost control.
And once that happens,
it's too late.
It's hard for me to say this,
but you may be the least
douchebaggy Red Dragon Emperor
that has ever existed.
That's why you're
kind of a total wimp
compared to the rest of them.
But I believe you're
the type of dragon
we can be mildly proud of!
D'you mean it? For real?
[DDRAIG] Kick out the jams
using your Balance Breaker
without a radical catalyst.
[ISSEI thinking] Of course!
So that's what he meant!
The sleeper has awakened.
[ISSEI]
Okay, guys. I think I know
what might help me crank
this up to the next level.
I can b*at her
with my Balance Breaker.
But first. I'm gonna
need your help, Rias!
What do you need, Issei?
I'll do anything in
my power to assist you.
In that case,
let me poke yo titties.
[RIAS]
Oh, jeez...
Well, if that's what it's
gonna take to get you going,
then have at it.
[gasps] I got the green light?
I'm gonna poke 'em!
I'm pushing that nipple
back deep in there, babe.
Let's rock and roll!
Do it quickly, please!
This feels a little ridiculous.
[TANNIN] What do you
think you're doing?
Tannin!
I need you to fend them
off long enough for me
to poke Rias's
funbags, all right?
[TANNIN]
In the middle of a battle,
you want to poke her breast?
They want to k*ll you!
This is no time to
try reaching second base!
No, it's not about that.
I'm gonna poke nip to
charge my Balance Breaker!
[TANNIN] Were our training
sessions that useless?
Wow, you really are an idiot.
[KUROKA]
Hey, Bikou.
Have you ever seen
this kind of tactic before?
Rias Gremory just whipped out
her license and registration,
and put 'em on display
for the Red Dragon Emperor!
I must see this!
[gasps] Hey,
leather face! Problem!
[TANNIN] What is it?
Did something go wrong?
[ISSEI] The right can
or the left can?
Which one do I choose?
[TANNIN]
You simpleton!
They're exactly the same!
Just do what you're
gonna do already!
What? This is serious, man!
There's no way in hell
they're both the same.
It's deal or no deal.
I'm pushing the buzzer
for the first time ever!
Lives are at stake here, dude,
so give me a real answer!
Rias? Any thoughts?
I don't care!
Just poke both of them at the
same time, you horny moron!
Both of 'em?
That's the best advice
I've ever been given!
Get ready. I'm comin'.
[AZAZEL] If you press them,
they cry out.
[ISSEI thinking]
If I press them, they cry out!
Oh no.
It works!
[DDRAIG]
You did it!
You've finally
boosted your power!
[DDRAIG]
Welsh Dragon... Balance Breaker!
You are the worst.
A Red Dragon
Emperor perv deluxe.
[ISSEI] Balance Breaker
Boosted Gear Scale Mail!
My power was unleashed by
poking my master's headlights!
[DDRAIG]
Congratulations, partner!
But I'm not looking forward
to what you're going to use
this hand for
when we're done here.
[TANNIN] Mass perversion aside,
you've finally done it!
Your energy
signature is radiant!
Heheh... Things are
starting to get interesting!
Now, say hello to my
mix of sage and demon magic!
Try some.
Huh?
[ISSEI]
Is that all you got?
No! You damn brat!
[ISSEI]
Don't make my friend cry.
You feel me?
[ISSEI]
If you come after Koneko again,
It won't matter if you're
a woman or her sister.
You are my enemy.
Eat me, jerk!
What are you doing?
The fight is going
on back there--
You became so excited
you lost perception.
Huh? Loki's not here. Why not?
Indeed. Pardon the pun,
but we don't have any
more time to monkey around.
[SIR ZECHS] So then, you fought
his accomplices in the forest.
[RIAS]
Yes, Bikou. Kuroka, too.
[SIR ZECHS] And did they
leave our Koneko unharmed?
She had a bit of a shock,
but she's fine.
No surprise, though.
Koneko is a member of my
esteemed household, after all.
Then I made the right
decision giving her to you.
You've become a true master
over your household, Rias.
I'm very proud.
Now that's what
I call a crazy day.
After angry gods and giant
wolves, it's nice to relax.
And it was good to see Irina.
Seems like she's doing well.
That's unbelievably awful.
It can't be easy, looking at
your sister as an enemy.
Like it or not,
you can't erase family.
Yeah, don't I know.
That's why.
I've decided
not to focus on it.
Instead I'll focus
on getting stronger.
All right! That's the
positivity I like to hear!
[RIAS] Hi, Issei.
Looking for something?
Hey Rias!
I was going to take a bath,
then got separated from Kiba,
and now I'm lost.
I was just heading
that way myself.
Why don't you tag along with me?
So, hey, uh, do you mind
if I ask you somethin'?
Go ahead.
How did you figure
out right off the bat
that I was gonna
chase after Koneko?
I know you.
Besides, it is my job to always
keep an eye on my servants.
Has anybody ever told
you you're the best?
Through thick and thin, you're
always looking out for us;
trying to keep us
safe and happy.
[AZAZEL] Looks like the
storm has passed, for now.
[SIR ZECHS]
Ajuka was kind enough
to teleport Loki and Fenrir to
a rather far away destination,
but it is a temporary solution.
[MICHAEL] Yes, I feel certain
he will press the issue again.
This was only the beginning.
[ODIN] As leader of
the Norse pantheon,
I take full responsibility.
[ROSSWEISSE]
I should have known things
would get out of hand
traveling with Odin.
I'm the Valkyrie
Rossweisse.
[SAJI]
You seein' what I'm seein'?
[ISSEI]
I'm seein' it!
That's one Valkyrie
I'd like to ride!
Business suit, suit of armor,
or birthday suit, I am down!
03x03 - Cat and Dragon
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Set during the struggle among the devils, fallen angels, and angels, the story follows the adventures of Issei Hyodo.
Set during the struggle among the devils, fallen angels, and angels, the story follows the adventures of Issei Hyodo.