[PLAYING THEME MUSIC]
The plane! The plane!
"After all this bother,
the princess..."
-Bye-bye! -ALL: Bye!
Good morning, boss.
Good morning, Tattoo.
Good morning, Mr. Roarke.
- Good morning, Julie.
- Good morning.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
ROARKE: Smiles,
everyone. Smiles.
[TROPICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
TATTOO: Boss, it
must be a mistake.
ROARKE: Why is that?
Because the
passenger list said that
two showgirls were
supposed to arrive.
And so they are.
Those ladies are
Miss Joan Michaels
and Miss Ruby Rogers
from a senior citizens'
retirement home
in Lee's Summit, Missouri.
Their fantasy is to appear
in a Fantasy Island
revival of the Ziegfeld Girls.
Ah, Mr. Roarke, I'm sure
they're very nice ladies,
but are they up to it?
ROARKE: Oh, it
won't be all that difficult.
You see, those ladies
were once Broadway stars
of the original
Ziegfeld Follies of .
Oh! That's nice!
We're letting them
be young again!
Unfortunately, it will test
their friendship to the limit,
possibly destroy
it for all time.
Who is that man, Mr. Roarke?
He calls himself Mr. Nick.
His real name is Mephistopheles.
-You mean the Devil? -Yes.
ROARKE: The Prince of
Darkness, the incarnation of evil.
What does he want here?
My ardent enemy
claims to be on a holiday.
Actually, he has come to ensnare
that which he has
always coveted.
TATTOO: What's that, boss?
My immortal soul.
Boss, that's terrible!
Let me help you.
Thank you, my friend, but I have
a very special assignment for you.
Why do you let Satan come here?
Both of you must realize
that evil exists
in all the world.
Unfortunately, I have no power
to keep it off Fantasy Island.
ROARKE: Mr. Ned Plummer,
a shoe salesman from
Brooklyn, New York.
He is an ardent admirer
and serious student
of the Old West,
especially that flamboyant and
deadly breed of men, the outlaws.
You mean like Jesse James?
Or the Dalton Boys.
Precisely. But Mr. Plummer
has a very special interest
in another outlaw
of the same period,
a certain Kid Corey,
who disappeared
with the profits of
the first million-dollar
bank robbery in
American history.
Don't tell me Mr. Plummer
wants to go back in time
to steal the loot.
You mean take it
away from Kid Corey?
Julie, Tattoo, you both
underestimate the depths
of Mr. Plummer's
scholarly dedication.
His fantasy is, indeed,
to go back to the
days of the Old West,
but only so he may
be, for one weekend,
a member of the outlaw clan
and actually meet in person
the legendary Kid Corey himself.
But boss, if Kid
Corey figures it out,
just like you did,
Mr. Plummer's gonna get sh*t.
That is a possibility
that has not eluded my
consideration, Tattoo.
And I will alert Mr. Plummer
of that very real danger.
My dear guests, I am
Mr. Roarke, your host.
Welcome to Fantasy Island.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Precious, no, no, no, no, no!
You circle. Keep
circling around.
That's it. Keep your heads
up and your arms out.
I said come on, heads
up! Get your heads up!
And smile! Smile.
That's it, big smiles.
Big smiles.
Ah, the great Florenz
Ziegfeld himself.
ROARKE: Indeed.
Girls, remember, the
posture. Keep it right.
RUBY: The costumes are lovely.
Oh, thank you.
Might I take a look?
Oh, by all means.
Julie, will you
escort Miss Rogers?
Certainly.
CARL: Billie, come
on, smile! Smile!
Do you think we're
two silly old ladies
for wanting this
fantasy, Mr. Roarke?
No, on the contrary.
I think it's charming.
Well, you see, we want
to taste those times again.
They were wonderful
days, Mr. Roarke.
We had the courage to be corny,
sentimental, enthusiastic,
and we were still confident
and proud of ourselves.
It was Broadway,
the Great White Way.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
- Oh, Grandmother, it is you!
- Billie!
Oh, Grandmother!
Oh, I know. What
am I doing here, right?
Well, what else? I'm
following in your footsteps.
I'm trying out for the
Ziegfeld Girls revival.
I bet that's why
you're here, too, right?
Um... To see it! Right!
-[SIGHS] -Well, Billie,
this is quite a surprise.
Oh, it's great!
Oh, I want you to
meet Carl Wagner.
He's directing the show.
How do you do?
Mr. Roarke, this
talkative young lady here
is my granddaughter,
Billie Michaels.
How do you do, Miss Michaels?
I know Mr. Wagner, of course.
Hi, boss, how you doing?
Billie's told me a lot
about you, Miss Michaels.
Maybe you'll drop by
rehearsal later on and give me
a few pointers on how it
was done in the old days?
The old days.
Of course, I'd love to.
Great, great. Now, I've got
things to do, so I'd better go.
See you in a
minute, honey, okay?
Okay.
Ah, isn't he wonderful?
I know I'm in love.
And I think he is, too.
I'll see you later. [GIGGLES]
Mr. Roarke, just what
are you trying to pull off?
I beg your pardon?
I... We didn't come here to tell
anyone how the show was done
in the good old days.
If that's all there is to it,
I'd have stayed home.
Now, you make us young, or
we're going to leave Fantasy Island.
PLUMMER: Dangerous? Of
course I know it could be dangerous.
Kid Corey is supposed
to have k*lled men.
And he didn't even
count foreigners.
If you think that you
are here to take away
the one million dollars
he stole from the bank,
you may be the th.
Tattoo is right, Mr. Plummer.
You must understand, everything
in your fantasy will be real.
Everything, including
g*ns and b*ll*ts.
That's why I'm here.
Look. I'm a shoe
salesman from Brooklyn
who's never been
west of the Hudson.
This could be the biggest
thing that happens to me.
Let's hope it is not the
last thing that happens.
PLUMMER: Don't worry.
I've read everything in the
public library about the Old West.
I know Kid Corey better
than he knew himself.
He was a Robin
Hood, a ladies’ man,
an adventurer, a romantic.
Look. I even had a copy made
of this "Wanted" poster of him.
It looks very much like you.
Very well, Mr. Plummer.
You've convinced me. Tattoo.
Now, if you'll just
step this way, please.
You're kidding. A saw horse?
Yes. If you'll just sit
in the saddle, please.
Really?
You're serious!
Oh, very serious, indeed.
Well... [CHUCKLES] Here I go.
And, Mr. Plummer, one usually
gets on a horse from the left side.
Of course. I was just testing.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
-Mr. Plummer. -Huh?
The left leg.
Left, oh, yes.
I feel a little foolish up here.
You want your fantasy
to begin, don't you?
Mr. Roarke, do
you... Mr. Roarke?
[STAMMERS] Mr. Roarke?
ROARKE: Remember,
Mr. Corey, the b*ll*ts will be real.
Mr. Roarke, Mr...
[EXCLAIMS]
Hey. This is great.
[LAUGHS]
Come on, boy!
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[URGING HORSES]
[g*nshots]
[PLAYING ROCK MUSIC]
MEPHISTOPHELES: Roarke!
[CHUCKLES]
You have come to
my party. How nice!
And you've brought your lovely
godchild. Can I get you a drink?
No, thank you.
Loosen up, Roarke.
I'm not here on business.
I'm taking a few days off.
A vacation?
You?
Even the Devil needs his rest.
I cannot tell you how tiring it
is doing evil day in, day out.
Yes, poor Satan.
Burnout must be an occupational
hazard in your profession, yes.
Well, I would be delighted to
arrange for your early retirement.
Believe me, Roarke,
I would love to step down.
But what can I do?
There is such a
demand for my services.
Yes, but you did not
come to Fantasy Island
to trap such easy prey, did you?
[LAUGHS]
Do you know my mind?
No, but I know your game.
It never changes.
You are after my immortal soul.
Yours?
Oh, Roarke.
What ego!
There are other souls here that
are worth having, too, you know.
I did warn you...
that we would
meet again, didn't I?
This time, I will win.
I'll bet you don't.
Julie, it is most unwise
to wager with the Devil.
Why don't you join
me at the party?
Oh! I can show you
some real action.
You get away from me.
Very well. We'll talk later.
When your keeper is not around.
[SIGHS]
You must be very careful, Julie.
I'm afraid that now you
are in grave danger, too.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
ROARKE: Yes?
[CLEARS THROAT] May we come in?
Oh, by all means, please do.
Well, ladies, are you ready?
For what?
I beg your pardon?
Joan hinted you've already
botched things up so far.
Well, I will try to do better.
Joanie, Joanie, that's us!
Oh, I was so beautiful.
Yes, Ruby, you've
told me before.
Mr. Roarke, can we
really look like that again?
Oh, yes. With
certain conditions.
Well, anything. You say it
and we'll do it, whatever it is.
Very well. Have a
seat, won't you? Please.
First, you must never tell
anyone, under any conditions,
that you are only
having a fantasy,
or it will end
immediately. Agreed?
Please remember that you
will return to your present ages
after this weekend, and
nothing can prevent that.
Nothing.
Well, half a loaf or even a few
crumbs are better than none.
Of course, you remember the song
that Florenz Ziegfeld made famous
in his glorification
of American beauty.
He called you "the most
beautiful women in the world."
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]
Think back to those times.
The early ' s.
Recapture the mood.
Remember how it was.
Remember how you looked.
The greats of the
Ziegfeld Follies. Ah, yes.
Their names were
legendary, indeed.
W.C. Fields,
Al Jolson,
and Eddie Cantor,
George M. Cohan,
Will Rogers,
music by George Gershwin.
Well, ladies. [CLAPS]
Satisfactory?
[GASPS]
[JOANIE SQUEALS]
Oh, Mr. Roarke!
We take it all back.
- JOANIE: You're wonderful.
- RUBY: Look at these legs!
There's not a varicose
vein anywhere!
Well, I certainly don't need
my cane, Mr. Roarke. Please.
[GASPS] Arthritis, rheumatism,
lumbago.
[BOTH SQUEALING]
Well, Billie's young
man wanted to know
how it was done in the old days.
Let's show him!
Oh, Mr. Roarke, thank you!
[GIGGLING]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[g*nshots]
Who are you?
The question is, boy,
who the hell are you?
Hey, Red! Who do you reckon
the guy in the black suit is?
Who do you think?
That's some gunslinger
the Kid hired to knock us off
so he can get away
clean with all the money!
Always thinking, that Kid.
Yeah.
Ain't no smelly old goat like
that gonna outthink Red O'Toole!
No, sir. I'll con him.
And when he shows
hisself, you two sh**t him.
[LAUGHS]
RED: Now you be ready!
Hey, Kid!
It's your old pal, Red!
We don't mean no harm!
We just wanna palaver about
that little misunderstanding!
You hear me, Kid Corey?
[STAMMERING]
Why did he call you Kid Corey?
Well, robbing banks
takes quite a toll on a man.
I'm younger than I look.
I'm not talking about your age.
I'm talking about your name.
Look... Look at this.
This is the real Kid Corey.
That's me before
I grew my beard.
Perfect likeness.
Looks to me like the
printer messed up.
Who are these guys, anyway?
Well, Sanders
is that little squirt.
A fallen ribbon salesman.
Big Ed is the tall one.
He was a devout pickpocket
till I took him in tow.
And the other guy?
That's Red O'Toole,
triple bigamist, k*ller.
You know, usual
run-of-the-mill types.
Sure.
These are your... These
are your ex-partners in crime
who you double-crossed, and
now they're coming after you
to get their share of the loot!
[LAUGHS] That's right. And
I'd have got away with it, too,
if my horse hadn't gone lame.
How come you're so
all-fired interested in me?
Oh, well, that's because
you're the first man
to get away with a million-dollar
bank robbery in American history.
I've read everything
there is about you.
You read about me?
-[g*nshots] -Why,
we knocked that bank over
it wasn't two hours ago.
You sure you ain't one
of them Pinkerton men
trying to set a
trap for me, boy?
No, no, no, no way!
My name is Ned Plummer.
I'm from Brooklyn, and
this is all my fantasy.
I paid for it.
You can check with Mr. Roarke
about this whole thing.
I believe you, boy. Yeah.
I believe you. You should have
told me this in the first place.
I'd have understood.
And as soon as I have time,
I'll do what you said there.
I'll check with this
Mr. Storke and find out...
No, Roarke, Roarke.
- Yeah, well, whatever it is.
- Yeah, yeah.
See, the thing is,
I'm in a little trouble here,
and seeing as how you
think so highly of me...
Yeah, sure, Kid.
I'm gonna scout around and see
if I can find us a way out of here.
I want you to keep your
eyes on these polecats.
You keep them pinned down and watch
for me to give you the signal to join me.
You can rely on me.
I'm gonna do just that, kid.
[BOTH LAUGH]
You start sh**ting now.
Kid! Come back!
Kid! Come back!
Hey, Kid, wait for me!
Kid, where are you going?
[THUNDER CRASHES]
[GASPS]
What are you doing here?
Oh.
I'm just taking the air. I get
so few opportunities on my job.
Julie, I hope I'm not late.
[SCREAMS]
-[GASPS] -Julie, help!
Help! Help me!
Julie, do something!
I'm sinking!
Julie!
What a pity. It looks
like she's going to die.
It is such a shame.
She's so beautiful.
Please, help her!
Julie, get me out of here!
You really do want me
to help you, don't you?
You know who I am.
I want to make one
thing perfectly clear.
You are calling on the
powers of darkness for help.
Am I correct?
Please! Help her!
Very well.
JULIE: Hold on!
That's right, my dear.
You look after her.
For now.
We'll meet later.
We have business to discuss.
[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]
No, girls. No, no! Come on.
Look, just take five. Take five.
JOANIE: It's not good.
Flo would have d*ed.
Well, it just lacks Flo's
sure hand and feeling.
I suppose you two knew the
immortal Flo himself, hmm?
Well, you might say we
know his style intimately.
Oh, great! So
everybody's an expert.
You weren't even a twinkle in your
father's eye when Ziegfeld was around.
In fact, your father probably wasn't
even a twinkle in his father's eye.
[ALL LAUGHING]
That's true.
Ruby reads a lot.
Well, maybe you could
just show us exactly
what you think the real
Flo would have done.
My pleasure.
JOANIE: Okay.
Here's the secret.
When you're up there,
you aren't just dancers
and you aren't just showgirls.
You're Ziegfeld girls!
You're the best!
It isn't just a walk or a step.
It's an attitude.
You're American women.
You're the most beautiful
women in the world.
Believe that.
Tell that to the audience,
and they'll believe it, too,
because they know it's true.
May we have some music, please?
[A PRETTY GIRL IS
LIKE A MELODY PLAYING]
Show them, Ruby.
JOANIE: ♪ A pretty
girl is like a melody
♪ That haunts you night and day
♪ Just like the strain
of a haunting refrain
♪ She'll start upon a marathon
♪ And run around your brain
♪ You can't escape ♪
That's enough.
That gives you the idea.
Ruby.
You were wonderful.
Was I?
Yes.
Coming down those stairs,
you were really the most
beautiful woman I have ever seen.
Tell me more.
I'd love to.
Let's talk for a minute, Ruby.
Don't go away.
No.
Girls, take an early
lunch break, will you?
Leave him alone.
You know I've always had
a weakness for directors.
And producers and stars
and other peoples' husbands.
That was a long time ago.
But this isn't.
He belongs to Billie.
He belongs to
whoever can get him.
To quote you, "If I knew
then what I know now."
Well, I do know now,
and I'm gonna use it.
They've got their
whole life ahead of them.
And all I've got is
just this one weekend.
You can't ruin two lives.
Not again. And I'll
stop you this time.
No, you won't, Joanie.
You can't.
[ACCORDION PLAYING]
Tattoo!
Boy, are you a
sight for sore eyes.
And sore feet.
-[GROANS] -Mr. Plummer,
are you enjoying your fantasy?
I have to give in.
Mr. Roarke was right.
Everything is all messed up.
And Kid Corey is nothing but
a treacherous, rotten, dirty old...
you know what.
That poster of his
is even a phony.
Let's go back to Fantasy Island.
Mr. Plummer. I don't
think you understand.
I thought that my boss told you
that once you start your fantasy,
you cannot turn back.
Are you kidding?
He stole my horse.
He's probably miles
away from here by now.
And he set me
up to be k*lled. Me!
His greatest fan!
If I get my hands on
him, I'm gonna take him...
Mr. Plummer, if you
go in that direction,
you will find Kid Corey.
And when you do, well, let
your conscience be your guide.
"Conscience."
That old fox is probably ,
miles out there by now.
[SCOFFS]
Tattoo, you're... Gone.
[GRUMBLING]
[THUNDER CRASHES]
Are you going somewhere?
To see Mr. Roarke.
He'll know how to deal with you.
Well, he's not your
master anymore.
I am.
Never.
But you made a deal
with me to save that girl.
Only after you trapped her.
You were gonna let her die.
Nevertheless, we
have a contract.
It's the standard form.
I did your bidding. Now
it is your turn to do mine.
You will never
have power over me.
I already have.
You belong to me.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Mr. Roarke?
Ah, Julie.
I'm glad you came.
I am very concerned.
Please sit down.
I have done battle with the
Devil on many occasions,
and I have always
managed to outwit him.
He seems so arrogant, so
frightening, so sure of himself.
Perhaps he feels the law of
averages are against me this time.
In any case, I have
laid a trap for him.
Let me help you, please.
Yes.
Yes.
I want you to keep
this safe for me.
What is it?
Something which will
sway the odds in our favor.
What's in it?
No, that's a secret I
cannot reveal to anyone.
But whatever you do,
you must not open this box.
I must have your word on it.
I promise, of course.
Good.
Keep the box with
you at all times.
I will tell you more
later, when I can.
I'll guard it with my life.
I know you will.
[THUNDER CRASHES]
[MEPHISTOPHELES LAUGHING]
That's right, Julie.
I'm here.
Inside of you.
You belong to me.
You can come out now, Kid.
I know you're around
here somewhere.
All I want is my horse.
How'd you find me?
Well, Tattoo said
that... Never mind.
I followed your trail,
you dirty double-crosser.
[LAUGHS]
Won't do you no
good to flatter me.
I ain't cutting you in, boy.
How much you
say I got away with?
In cash.
A million dollars.
One million dollars!
[EXCLAIMS]
Sounds like enough to comfort
me in my old age, don't it?
That's stolen money.
No good can come
from ill-gotten gains.
Lordy me, boy. What
world you been livin' in?
Maybe you're one of
them g*n-toting preachers
that's been cluttering
up this territory.
No, I'm just a shoe salesman
who believed all that baloney
about the Robin
Hoods of the West.
Robin Hood!
You're nothing but a smelly,
backstabbing, double-dealing,
treacherous old curmudgeon.
Nobody
calls me old!
Well, I do!
And now, I'm gonna go over
there and get on my horse
and ride out of here,
and I hope I never set
my eyes on you again!
Boy!
You'd be a lot safer
if you turned around.
I never sh**t
nobody in the front.
Well, maybe you'd better
make an exception in this case,
'cause I have had it
up to here with you.
And now, I am
gonna take that g*n...
[g*nshots]
Maybe we'd better
skedaddle out of here.
Oh, no! Oh, no. I'm tired of you and
your friends messing up my fantasy.
Uh-huh?
[CHUCKLES]
Okay! Okay, you windbags,
come on over here!
You're just figments of
my imagination, anyhow!
[EXCLAIMING]
[WHOOPING]
Look, they're all gone!
MATT: We got you, Kid
Corey, whichever one you be.
[♪♪♪♪♪♪]
[THUNDER CRASHES]
Here is the box.
Thank you, Julie.
We will build a
fire of juniper wood
and burn the
contents of the box.
It's a vital condition.
But the brick won't burn.
No.
But it has confirmed
my worst fears.
Julie would not have
known about the brick.
My godchild would never
have broken her word
and looked inside the box.
I know what you have done.
MEPHISTOPHELES: Not bad, Roarke.
That brick really had me going.
It was a clever ruse.
It was nothing compared
to the convoluted
deviousness of your traps.
You are after me,
and yet you ensnare
Julie, of all people.
Oh, come on now, Roarke.
You didn't think I'd be
such a fool as to
att*ck you directly.
Not with your dear, little
godchild so near at hand,
ready to be plucked.
She hasn't had an evil
thought in all her life.
All the more reason, Roarke,
why I delight in her downfall.
Excuse me.
One moment.
I will talk to Julie.
Too late.
Get out of my way.
Julie, you must hear me.
Answer me.
JULIE: Help me. Please.
As long as you are alive, Julie,
you are the master
of your own soul.
No one, no power,
can take from you your
choice of heaven or hell.
While you breathe, I will help.
Join your will to mine.
Now.
There was no need
to be violent, Roarke.
All you had to do
was ask me politely,
and I would have left her body.
You should know,
it's her soul I'm after.
And I will take that.
At midnight, tomorrow.
No.
Please, save me.
Roarke, there is a way.
Yes!
She is mine.
Unless, of course,
you offer me your
soul in place of hers.
Now, I think you'll agree,
I know you better
than you know yourself.
And you are not the sort of man
to let your godchild down.
It's checkmate, Roarke.
At midnight tomorrow,
you will agree to serve me.
I will own you, Roarke.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
KID COREY: Sheriff.
Chester.
Well, what is it now, old man?
Now that's just the
point, Sheriff, Your Honor.
I'm just a poor old man that was
took kidnapped by the Kid there.
You know, that's that murdering,
bank-robbing Kid Corey there.
Well, I knows
that one of you is.
Oh, Sheriff, Your Worship.
I'm just a snake oil peddler
that he robbed and kidnapped
and made go along
with him for company.
You saw him run off
those three enemies of his.
He's mean. He's a k*ller.
Isn't there some kind of
a reward or something out
for capturing him
and hanging him?
A reward?
Yes, sir, there is, Sheriff.
Oh, I remember now.
Yeah, it's a thousand dollars.
And I can prove
that he's the Kid.
Proof positive?
Pure positive.
Chester.
Whoa!
Proof first.
It's in his vest pocket there.
It's a "Wanted" poster
with his picture on it.
Big as life! He's
very proud of it.
I'll check first.
Hey, what... [GROANS]
MATT: Let's take
a look at this poster.
All right, Chester.
Adios, old man.
What's he doing out there?
Remember now thy creator
in the days of thy youth
and the evil days that... Etcetera
there... Repent, you sinner! Repent!
You, Sheriff, you are an
honor to your profession, sir.
Good day, sir.
You're not letting him
go! That's Kid Corey!
He's a k*ller, a bank robber!
Lying and trickery will
do you no good now.
And carrying this around
will just stretch your neck, Kid.
Chester, we get us a
trial started right away.
CHESTER: Yes, sir. I'll
round up the boys, Matt.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Ruby!
We're going to talk.
Excuse us, please.
Tell him to go, or I'll end all
of this right now for both of us.
Carl, let me talk
to her alone, okay?
Will I see you later?
-Yeah. Later. -All right.
Have you forgotten what you are?
What we both really are?
Two old ladies
having a last fantasy.
No, I'm young, even if
it's just for a little while.
And, Joanie, I really love him.
[SIGHS]
You've never loved anybody in
your whole life but yourself, Ruby.
All right. Maybe that's true.
Maybe that's why I really
need to love someone now.
Your need was always to take
someone away from somebody else.
We were friends,
working together in the Follies.
Really friends.
Still, you needed my husband.
Broke up our marriage.
Yet we stayed friends.
No. Not always.
I hated you so much,
I once bought a g*n
and was going to k*ll you.
Later, it didn't seem
to matter anymore.
There had been
enough unhappiness.
But this is different.
Carl's young, and
he belongs to Billie.
Let them be young
and happy together.
This time, let the
other woman win!
For me.
For yourself.
Joanie, I...
I never knew that you
ever really hated me.
That was a long time ago.
You don't have to worry about
nobody loving you anymore,
'cause I love you.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Your affairs are
in order, Julie.
Yes.
You understand
everything I have told you?
Yes, I understand.
Don't be afraid, Julie.
I'm sorry.
I can't help it.
You're stronger than you know.
I won't let you
down, Mr. Roarke.
The Devil isn't
infallible, you know.
There are many ways
to slip through his traps.
I have done it many times.
But how?
I have an idea that might work,
a scheme in his own design.
But first, we must have
the most serious conversation
two people can have.
It is a question of how much
we love and trust each other.
MATT: All right, boys. Let's have a
little quiet and get this thing over with.
Now, this here be proof positive
that this is the man.
And I be claimin' the reward.
Now, you wants to confess?
No, I do not wants to
confess. I'm innocent!
This is all just a fantasy.
[STAMMERS] I'm not Kid Corey.
Look, I'm a shoe salesman
from Brooklyn, and I...
Will you shut?
-[DOOR OPENS] -Now.
[WHISTLES]
Who...
Who in tarnation are you?
My dear man, I am Cissy Darumple
of the New York Daily News.
And this is my
assistant, Donald.
I am at large in the West doing a story
about quaint and colorful characters.
Someone said there was a
famous desperado imprisoned here.
Ladies ain't
allowed at a hangin'.
You don't look so
desperate to me, little man.
Not me. That's him over there.
That's Kid Corey, the
k*ller and bank robber.
Oh, my! This is
exciting, Miss Darumple.
Yeah.
Kid Corey, eh?
Hmm.
He does look a
little quaint at that.
And cute, too.
Look, lady, will you help me
get out of here? I'm innocent.
Ooh. Wish I could say that.
I wish we had more time, Kid.
We could write a story together,
if you know what I mean.
But don't worry.
I'll use my imagination.
Oh, wait. Don't you
want to hear the truth?
Look. What about your
editorial responsibility?
You know, power of the press?
Nobody leaves!
What about Kid Corey? He's
getting away with a million dollars!
Smile.
MATT: Now, we gonna
get on with this trial.
Wait a minute. You can't
have a trial without a judge.
Oh, well, Matt's the judge, too.
MATT: Correct. Duly elected.
Best hanging judge we ever had!
Now everybody just stay quiet!
We're gonna do
this nice and legal.
Guilty or not guilty?
Not guilty.
He says, "Not guilty."
Everybody here think
he's guilty, say "aye."
-ALL: Aye! -Let's hang him!
It appears, Corey,
that you is guilty.
Hear ye, hear ye, hear ye.
This court is now adjourned.
[ALL CHEERING]
MAN: Hang him!
This is our fantasy, Ruby.
- This is what we came for!
- [BOTH GIGGLING]
Good luck.
Thank you.
No, Joanie. It's okay.
Come on. Let's go!
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
[ S MUSIC PLAYING]
Boy, weren't we something?
We still are.
Come on, Joanie. We've
got something important to do.
But this is our big moment.
I know.
Let's go.
Joanie, I'm not very
good at this kind of talk,
but I just want you to know that
your friendship means more to me
than anything
else, including Carl.
You remember when...
Well, you remember when you
broke up our little love scene?
Yes. I was going to tell
Carl about our fantasy.
Mr. Roarke said that
if we told anybody...
Exactly.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
Okay, ladies. Five
minutes, please.
Oh, hey, cutie. Come on in here.
I want you to
listen very carefully.
Now, we're only
having a fantasy, and...
I'm really a -year-old
woman and she's .
Huh?
Thanks a lot. Thanks.
[SIGHS]
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
Excuse me, what
did you say? Just...
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
You know something?
All this really does
belong to the young.
We were then. They are now.
And what's in between is
just a haunting old memory.
Yes, Joanie, you were right.
Young boys do
belong to young girls.
Yeah.
And it serves them both right!
Well, what is it you
want now, ma'am?
This place is gonna be
mighty busy in a few minutes.
I always like to get
a man's approval.
Don't want him to think
I'm taking advantage of him.
Why don't you and the sheriff go
outside and take a picture, Donald.
Of me? For the paper?
That, too.
Of course, I may want to keep
a copy for my own memoirs.
Later on.
Yes, ma'am.
Come on, Chester. I wants
to make sure I get that reward.
Any direct quotations
you'd like to add to my story?
I'm innocent.
Oh, I'd like to help
you out, sweetheart,
but we're running out of
time, if you know what I mean.
Of course, I'll do my
best for you, post-mortem.
Listen.
"Robin Hood of the
West dies on the gallows,
"proclaiming love
for unknown woman."
That's the heading.
"What raging
passion of the heart
"drove this infamous k*ller and
bank robber, known as Kid Corey,
"to pillage and m*rder?
"Noted as a lothario and
heartbreaker, the Kid..."
I read the piece. Pure hogwash.
You read it?
But I just wrote it.
I know.
But I read it a year
ago in the public library
along with a lot of other
garbage about Kid Corey.
Um...
You go on about how "he seduced
countless women in the West
"in the search for the one woman
he loved, who somehow eluded him."
Lucky lady.
And then... And then
you go on about how
he put together a
bloody fortune to give her
when he did find her.
[STAMMERING] And then...
Wait! Wait, lady!
This is all just a fantasy!
Or is it?
[CHUCKLES]
Well, Kid, it's time.
[ALL CHATTERING]
Out of the way! Well,
we got a good day for it.
Any last words, Kid?
Crime pays.
For some people.
Unregenerate to the end.
Get.
Out of the way, kids.
We got a hangin' going on.
[CHUCKLING]
Tattoo! Would you believe it,
I thought you and Mr. Roarke
had forgotten all about me.
Let me sink or swim
or something like that.
I'll tell you something. I've learned
a great deal about all this nonsense,
all that romantic stuff about
the gunfighters and all that.
What are you gonna do
with that rope? Tattoo...
Tattoo, what... Tattoo,
what are you doing?
Tattoo, don't pull that thing.
What are you gonna do?
I'm gonna fulfill your fantasy.
That's what the
boss told me to do.
Don't! Don't pull that thing,
because if you pull that thing, I will...
[EXCLAIMS]
[GROANS]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
I'm glad to see that
you are punctual.
Julie and I fulfill
our legal obligations.
We require the same
of you, of course.
You may rest assured.
I may despise justice, but
I adore the letter of the law.
Oh? I shall remember that.
Now, my contract
with Julie was oral,
but I have here a
certified agreement.
I do hope you're not
going to challenge it.
No.
No, I admit that you have a
legal claim against Julie's soul.
-You do? -Mm-hmm.
Now that's not like you,
Roarke. What's the catch?
No catch. I can't stop you
from taking what's yours.
That is marvelous. You've
become quite reasonable.
-Thank you. -No, thank you.
Come along, Julie.
There is one minor detail.
One of those little
legal technicalities.
What is that?
Well, I have a document
here, properly drawn,
with the usual provisions...
But why not see for yourself?
Julie has sold you her soul?
Yes.
[SIGHS]
This is dated today.
My claim comes first.
But mine is signed
and notarized.
We have equally valid claims.
[CHUCKLES]
I suppose that
makes us partners.
Never.
I don't like the idea
much myself. No.
Perhaps we should
each claim half.
-Half a soul? -Yes.
How can I take half a soul?
What can I do with half a soul?
You could have it on Mondays,
Wednesdays and Fridays.
I will take it Tuesdays,
Thursdays and Saturdays.
Sundays, we will
have to alternate.
This is absurd, Roarke.
Souls cannot check in and out
of hell like it is some damn motel.
Well, if you want
to press your claim,
you'll simply have to make an
exception for Julie, won't you?
This is ridiculous. You cannot
compromise with the Devil!
I always thought that
compromise was your specialty.
No?
Well, then it would seem that the
only way around our little impasse
is for us both to
release our claims.
Oh.
Oh, no, no.
-[LAUGHS] -Hmm?
I see what you're trying
to do. It won't work.
-What? -Oh, no. It won't work.
Why?
You see, she may not
be able to go with me,
but she can't go
with you either.
[CHUCKLES]
What does that mean, Mr. Roarke?
It means that you will
be eternally damned
in limbo between
his world and mine.
Oh, please. You can't
let him do that to me.
No.
No, I cannot allow that.
You win, Mephistopheles.
Relinquish your
interest in Julie,
and you may claim my soul.
Done.
You're mine, Roarke.
You're finally mine.
Oh, no!
It's too late for you
to talk him out of it.
I renounce all claims to you.
Roarke.
Will you escort me
personally to Hades?
Oh, I have a much more
imaginative future in mind for you.
You will continue to run Fantasy
Island, but under my direction.
You will pander to all
forms of depraved fantasies.
Fantasies of evil,
fantasies of lust,
fantasies of corruption.
Your lovely island will
become the gateway to hell.
Oh, Roarke,
don't look so gloomy.
You will grow to love it.
I can see a great future
ahead for you in my service.
Why, with you at my side,
there is no limit to the
depths that we can plumb.
But all this must wait a while.
I simply cannot resist
making you suffer just a little
for all the years of trouble
that you've caused me.
Come.
JULIE: Wait!
Excuse me.
What is it now?
Where are you going
with my property?
With your property?
I have a document here.
It is properly signed
and notarized.
Oh, yes.
Did I forget to mention that I
have already sold my soul to her?
Oh, I'm terribly sorry.
But does that make us partners?
I still own half of you, Roarke.
Not even half.
[BELL TOLLING]
Poor Devil.
Midnight has come and gone.
I'm afraid you failed to claim
your half at the appointed time.
It's already past midnight.
You are too late.
The letter of the law.
Remember?
Damn you, Roarke!
That is precisely what I
have been trying to avoid.
Damn you!
[THUNDER CRASHES]
I beg your pardon, Roarke.
I concede the battle.
But our eternal w*r goes on.
You said it yourself, Roarke.
One cannot always win.
But the law of
averages are on my side.
We shall do battle again.
My final victory is inevitable.
[GASPS]
You did it.
[SIGHS]
Only because you were willing
to trust me unconditionally.
No greater love has any
man or woman than that.
[TROPICAL MUSIC PLAYS]
Thank you, Mr. Roarke, Julie.
You're very welcome.
Mr. Roarke, there
was a certain girl
in the show. Her name was Ruby.
Do you want to find her again?
No. No, I found what I wanted.
I just thought I might say
goodbye to her, that's all.
Every man has a Ziegfeld Girl
he remembers in a dream
now and then, Mr. Wagner.
Fortunately, you have one
with whom to share your life.
Yes. Yes, I have.
- Thank you, Mr. Roarke.
- You're very welcome.
-Goodbye. -Goodbye, Mr. Wagner.
-Goodbye. -Bye.
Ah, yes. There we are.
-Thank you. -Yes.
And may I return these?
- Oh, thank you, Mr. Roarke.
- Yes. You're welcome.
Madame.
Was your fantasy satisfactory?
No, not entirely, my child.
There are a few
things I can think of
that might have gone
differently, shall we say.
Oh, she means she lost a lover
but she kept a friend.
Yes, and maybe someday
I'll figure out if it
was all really worth it.
-[BOTH CHUCKLE] -Joanie.
JOANIE: Thanks for
everything, Mr. Roarke.
We really had a nice time.
The dancing was wonderful.
I'm delighted.
Come on, Ruby. Let's go home.
[SIGHS]
I'm afraid things didn't
turn out too well for them.
On the contrary, Julie.
Many persons love the
sacrifices for friendship,
so long as they're not
called upon to make them.
When they find the
strength to do so,
they enrich themselves
with grace and dignity.
Isn't it a great day?
Oh, yes, Julie.
The sort of day that
makes one glad to be alive.
Have you listened
to the birds today?
They sound happy, too.
Even the air smells sweeter.
-I know why. -So do I.
Our uninvited guest is gone,
and the stench of evil has
departed Fantasy Island.
Will he come back?
ROARKE: Not for a while.
We gave him quite
a b*ating, you and I.
He won't be in a hurry
to take us on again.
Doesn't it worry you
about what he said?
You mean about the law of
averages being on his side?
It worries me.
Oh, Julie, Julie. The world
is not ruled by chance.
The Devil can only win
if we are willing
to play his game.
Sorry, boss. We're late.
Watch out. Here comes Kid Corey.
I've had it with that, Tattoo.
ROARKE: Have you,
indeed, Mr. Plummer?
What do you mean? Of
course. You know I have.
But surely you
understand that in reality,
it was you who miraculously
escaped the gallows
and disappeared forever
into that mysterious
and legendary land
of the all-American West.
In fact, as well as fantasy,
you are Kid Corey.
What about the poster?
Mr. Roarke said that
was a picture of you.
Oh, without the slightest doubt.
You, I believe,
actually met the lady
who took the photograph?
That's right.
Then I am Kid Corey!
What happened to
that old son of a g*n
who was the real Kid Corey?
I have it on very
reliable authority
that he retrieved
the million dollars
from its hiding
place at the camp
where you overtook him
and retired to a South
American country.
However, it was
only a short time
until the justice he deserved
finally caught up with him.
That means that I
am the real Kid Corey.
Watch out, Brooklyn!
Kid Corey rides again.
[LAUGHING] Uh-huh. Yeah.
[ALL CHUCKLING]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪♪♪]