15x09 - The Crystal Ball: Episode 200

[bunniefuu]

Let the Lip Sync
LaLaPaRuZa Smackdown begin.

[suspenseful music]

We battling each other.

One goes down.
One goes up.

One goes down.
One goes up.

Three of you remain,
but only two of you

will lip-synch for your life.

[gasps]
Ah!

Anetra, who do you
choose to save?

♪ ♪

Spice.

[mouthing words]

Anetra, shantay, you stay.

Jax, sashay away.

♪ RuPaul's Drag Race ♪

The winner
of "RuPaul's Drag Race"

receives a one-year supply

of Anastasia Beverly Hills cosmetics

and a gag-worthy grand prize
of $200,000,

served by Cash App,

with extra-special guest judge
Julia Garner.

♪ "RuPaul's Drag Race" ♪

♪ May the best drag queen win,
best drag queen win ♪

[upbeat music]

New day.
Who dis?

Another day, another slay.

It is the top nine,
and I'm feeling fine.

To have survived
the Lip Sync LaLaPaRuZa

on my first lip sync
feels really good.

- Oh.
- Jaxie.

Jax has just gone home,
and it kind of felt

like a long time coming.

In total, she lip-synched
five times this season.

And she's a sick performer,
but I mean, after five times,

like, what more can you give?

"I love you all and cannot
wait to see you on the road.

P.S., Anetra,
I will get you back."

[laughter]

Girl, I have some battle scars

from this f*cking
Lip Sync Smackdown.

They put me through
the wringer, bitch.

And I had to battle
Simone Biles.

But I did come out a winner.

So how's everybody feeling
after surviving LaLaPaRuZa?

I was fully kidding when I said

my top era started yesterday.

It's starting today.

- Oh, oh!
- I meant today.

I agree. I'm starting
my congeniality era right now.

[laughter]

[door opens]

Hello, hello, hello.

[all screaming]

Nautical fit!

Oh, my God.

My queens, now, as you all know,

this season marks
the 15th anniversary

of "RuPaul's Drag Race."

And this week
is our 200th episode.

Can I get a gay-men?

[all cheering]

Oh, my God!

And we are going to celebrate.

- Ooh.
- Aww.

First, for today's
mini challenge,

through the magic
of green screen,

you need to photobomb
iconic moments

in "Drag Race" herstory.

- Ooh.
- Oh, werk.

- Okay.
- All right.

Now, you'll have 15 minutes
to get into quick,

attention-grabbing drag

using items provided
by PrettyLittleThing.

Ooh.

Go.

- Aah!
- Oh!

This is cute.

Thank God I'm so pretty.

All I need is five minutes
to do my makeup.

[laughter]

All right, ladykins, time is up.

First up, Salina Es Titties photobombing

Laganja Estranja's
season six entrance.

Aah!

Come on, season 15.

Let's get EsTitties.

You wanted a twist, eh?

[laughs]

She's leaving it all
on the floor.

Anetra photobombing Willow Pill.

Oh, is that bread?

- From her toaster.
- [laughs]

If you stay bready,
you ain't got to get...

Bready.

[laughter]

What about, like,
jumping into the bathtub?

How you gonna capture that
in a still...

Ooh! Oh!

Oh. Oh!

Oh, girl.

She don't want no Will Pill,

but she do want a bubble bath.

Malaysia Babydoll Foxx

photobombing Miss Vanjie.

♪ Miss Malaysia ♪

♪ Miss Malaysia ♪

Spice photobombing Lady Gaga.

[boing]
[laughter]

Oh, you gonna show
your disco stick.

Luxx Noir London

photobombing
Vivacious and Ornacia

leaping into season six.

[grunts]

It's the grunting for me.

[laughs]

[grunts]

Here's to the ladies who launch.

Mistress Isabelle Brooks
photobombing me

and Morgan McMichaels.
[pop]

Morgan, over here.

Oh!

[pop]

[laughter]

Up next, we've got
Marcia Marcia Marcia.

Oh, my God.
You've never looked prettier.

[laughter]

Now, you'll be photobombing

the crowning of Jinkx Monsoon.

Oh, I see some
Linda Evangelista there.

Sasha Velour
has never looked so good.

[laughter]

Talk about bald ambition.

Sasha Colby photobombing me...

- Mama.
- At the DESPY Awards.

Girls.

[laughs]

This was the time
that I saw Michelle

out of hair and makeup.

Loosey photobombing

Serena Chacha in the water t*nk.

Oh.

Oh.

[laughter]

I think your LaDuca is showing.

[laughter]

Ladykins, the winner
of today's mini challenge is...

[drumroll]

Anetra.

[cheers and applause]

- [laughter]
- Yes!

You won a cash prize of $2,500,

courtesy of PrettyLittleThing.

Come on, Miss Cannonball.

[laughter]

My queens, to keep
this party going,

for this week's maxi challenge,
we are throwing a ball.

[all screaming]

Good God!

And since the traditional


is crystal,

we're having ourselves
a Crystal Ball, darling.

All: Ooh!

Now, you need to serve
three sickening looks.

Look number one:
Start Your Engines.

[engine turning over]

An update
of my classic racing suit

like we've never seen it before.

Look number two:
My Favorite Ball.

You take on an Eleganza look
from one of our past balls

and make it your very own.

Look number three:
Crystallized Eleganza.

Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo.

Using accessories and materials

from Zelouf Fabrics,

you need to create
a look from scratch

that is dripping in crystals.

- Ooh.
- Oh, okay.

I love that.

And, ladykins, whatever you do,

go balls to the wall.

Period.

I've been waiting for this
since I've gotten here

because I love
to sew my own costumes.

And it's my job now
to show these people

that I am the one to b*at.

Racers, start your engines.

And may the best drag queen win.

Ooh!
[applause]

[upbeat music]

- Whoo!
- Good God!

- Oh!
- Ooh!

Baby, it's the 15th anniversary

of "RuPaul's Drag Race,"

so we are throwing
a Crystal Ball, baby.

We got to serve three
different looks on the runway.

The first two looks,
we get to bring from home.

But the last look, baby,
we have to make that here.

Got all my sh*t falling.

Aah!

It's crystal Armageddon.

Fabric is being pulled and torn.

- Oh!
- Nobody is safe.

[items shattering]

[people scream]

- Come on, Loosey!
- Showgirls!

The girls are girling.

The girls
are definitely girling.

These girls aren't playing
any games.

- Girl, I...
- It's literally...

Literally, I lifted it up.

Marcia, it's...
Yeah, you lifted it up,

but you didn't grab it.

Okay.

I'm trying to win
a crown and some money,

so, like, I'm thinking
about myself.

I'm worried about Heidi.

Mama!

Oh, my gosh,
no one's going for gold.

Everyone's going
for silvers or whites.

So I got the perfect fabric
that would match

my skin perfectly,
and I got all these appliqués.

I am not a sewer by any means,

but I know my body,
and I love fashion,

so I'm just hoping it's enough.

♪ ♪

Crystallized.

- Got your crystal hair?
- [laughs]

The inspiration for this
is Kennedy Davenport.

Trey didn't like the session,

so he had gutted me.

But you know I didn't die.

- I crystallized.
- I have crystallized. [laughs]

This gown is stressing me
the f*ck out.

Like, crystals can take
a lot of time,

especially if you're working
with a lot of them.

So time is definitely
of the Jaida Essence Hall.

And now I'm a Glamazon bitch
ready for the runway...

I hope.

♪ ♪

Hey, squirrel friends!

All: Hi!

We've got company.

- Oh, it's just me.
- Oh!

- Ah!
- Don't worry.

Hi, Carson!

Hi, everybody.
Hi, angels.

- Come on, darling.
- Okay.

All right, Spice, come on over.



Yeah!
[laughs]

Everyone's doing it.

So let's talk design.

Well, basically
I'm all about the purse.

I love an outfit that kind of
revolves around a purse.

- Yes, of course.
- Mm-hmm.

So I saw this,
and I was like, ooh!

Kind of like a disco night
almost, like...

If you come out
just holding a disco ball,

like, Christmas tree ornament
as a bag,

not gonna cut it.

A lot of the silhouettes
that you have come here with

are very similar.

So this being a design challenge

is an opportunity
to maybe switch it up.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

We all know you're gorgeous,

but some of your looks
have lacked personality.

We know that you have it.

This is your
storytelling moment.

Who is Spice?

Give us a little bit extra.

After hearing
Carson's critiques,

we have to make this more.

And by more, I'm just
assuming more fabric.

The last design challenge,
I was safe,

so I'm excited for this one.

I'm like, we're gonna
up the ante.

I may not know how to sew,

but I can give you
a longer skirt.

You know, I might still have
a split up to the cooch,

but it's still gonna be
more fabric, so...

All right, Mistress!

Are you learning how to work
that sewing machine?

Actually,
quite the opposite, love.

I was offering her some advice.

[laughter]

I hope you get it, baby!

Okay.

Ciao, this saucy bitch.

Oh, you've done a board.
A board!

I want to really just go
full glam, like, full pageant,

- Texas tease.
- Mm-hmm.

I know a lot of other girls
are doing gowns,

but some things are looking
very gluttonous and gaudy.

So I want to make sure
that I'm utilizing

the embellishments
and kind of using them

to still shape my body.

Sure, okay.

I think that most
of the time, the big girls

aren't necessarily known
for their fashion,

so I'm hoping to shake
things up this go-round.

So now, you've revealed
your big personality.

How did the other girls
react to that?

I think that
the other girls could be

intimidated by it at times.

I might come off
a little aggressive

because at the end of the day,
I'm here to win.

I think that at times, the girls

think I'm playing games.

But one thing they can't deny
is that I keep it real.

That's right.
All right, kiddo.

I can't wait to see
what you do on the runway.

- Knock 'em dead.
- Thank you.

Salina EsTitties.

Ooh, she bringing
everything over here!

Oh, good. Yeah.

So what do you have there?

I'm giving very, like,
beautiful evening gown,

like, red carpet moment.

- Ooh.
- Okay.

This is, like, the base,
and I was thinking

of using this pretty lace
to go over it.

So I was gonna layer this on top

to give a nude illusion
and this, like, sparkly.

But I have all this trim.

So I was gonna maybe
use this to, like,

do the trim and, like, the slit.

There's a slit down the leg.

Well, I'm hearing
a lot of stuff.

- Yeah.
- I'm hearing a lot of stuff.

- Okay, yes.
- And...

This is pretty busy.

Then you have that tape.

And then you have
this nude illusion burnout.

That's three very busy things.

Got it.

So if style is not
maybe your forte,

keep it simple,
but make it amazing.

And make sure you
sell it on the runway.

I need that.

Only 'cause my last
design moment landed me

in the bottom,
I just want to make sure

I deliver this time, so yeah.

Sure.

So how are you doing
emotionally?

I think coming here,
like, I walked

through the entrance room
very confident,

knowing exactly who I was.

And the minute I got out
of drag here, I was like,

this is weird
and there's, like, a lot

of confidence everywhere else.

So I felt like I shrunk myself.

It has to do with the saboteur

trying to rear its ugly head.

It's not as important as it's
making itself out to be.

- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.

Listen, let the emotions come.

It's okay.
Let it all hang out.

We fall in love with you
because of the emotion.

Don't be afraid of it.

You know, having been
in the bottom

from a design challenge already,

like, I'm going into this
with a little more pressure.

I'm tired of being safe.

And I'm damned if I'm gonna be

in the bottom again
on a design challenge.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

♪ ♪

- So, Loosey.
- Yes, baby?

Do you think you have a chance

of winning this challenge?

Yeah, I definitely think
I have a chance

of winning this challenge.

'Cause I think the girls
got really scared last week,

'cause I feel like
you got really mad

that you didn't win.

[laughter]

You're really trying it today.

Loosey, just admit that you
wanted to win the challenge.

That part.

There was no winner
of the challenge.

No, they're talking about the
one you was going crazy about.

That I was going crazy about?

[laughter]

I'm f*cking pissed.

I'm very, very upset
that I was not in the top.

Y'all can have literal
mental breakdowns.

I say once that I was pissed
I was safe,

and now we have to talk about
it the rest of the season.

[gasps]
Why is she standing up?

Loosey, stop!

[laughter]

Mistress is doing this thing.

I think half of it is joking,
and I think half of it

is her trying to get in my head.

And you know what? Fine.

I'm just gonna keep
winning challenges.

Who is a bitch in here
who knows how to dart

stuff to make it smaller?

Is that the one you've been
reading this whole time?

[laughter]

[upbeat music]

Sleeping Beauty has arrived!

Okay, barely.

It is the runway day
of runway days.

It is the Crystal Ball.

Ah!

We have to present three
looks on the runway tonight.

We are also hitting
the 200th episode

of "RuPaul's Drag Race."

And honestly, I feel
so honored to be here.

♪ ♪

Does anybody have,
like, q*eer siblings?

- I have a gay brother.
- What?

- Older or younger?
- He's a year younger than me.

- Oh!
- You have siblings, no?

- You're the oldest?
- Yeah.

I have three younger siblings,

but my mom and I don't speak.

Oh, really?

And it's been, like, five years.

What happened?

I used to live in a house
with my stepfather,

my mom's kids, my brothers.

She kind of found
my drag and my wigs

and my makeup
in my closet one day.

And she, like, confronted me
about it, and she was like,

it's okay.

You can come out and you
can, like, be who you are.

You don't have to hide yourself.

So for, like, a week, I was,
like, feeling really good.

I was, like, really comfortable
in the house.

And then, like, a week later...

After a week of, you know,
having that conversation

with her, she told me
that I was making everybody

in the house uncomfortable

and that I had to leave,

like, right away.

[somber music]

And...

♪ ♪

I had to leave the house
without saying goodbye to...

To my brothers and my family.

And I had to...

♪ ♪

I'm sorry.

[crying]

♪ ♪

I just want to, like, hug you.

Like, f*cking sucks, bro.

Yeah.

One positive thing
that came out of it was,

I ended up reconnecting
with my biological father.

He and I had a really rocky
relationship when I was a kid.

But he actually ended up
being one of my,

like, greatest supporters now.

♪ ♪

And he ended up taking me in,

and he bought me
my first sewing machine.

Is there still part of you
that wants to go home,

you know?

For me, like, my entire life,

I felt like I can't be who I am,

and then I was told
that I could be,

and then never mind.

So I still think
that kind of, like, lingers.

I'm not gonna complain,
because I love my life

and I'm so happy
with my partner and my career.

I'm on f*cking
"RuPaul's Drag Race."

But I do wish that I had my mom.

♪ ♪

Love you.

I love you.

I'm sorry if I got makeup
on your shirt.

No, please!

I'll gonna sell it
and make money off of it.

Stop!
[laughter]

I got the f*cking duck
on my shirt.

[upbeat music]

Okay, y'all,
it's the 15th anniversary

of "RuPaul's Drag Race."

There have been
some crazy moments

on this show that are iconic.

I quote it all the time,

the fight between Shangela
and Mimi Imfurst.

I don't have a sugar daddy.

I've never had a sugar daddy.

If I wanted a sugar daddy, yes,

I probably could
go out and get one

because I am what?
Sickening!

- You bitch!
- Oh!

[laughs]

Alyssa Edwards in general

- just doing anything.
- Anything.

I do a really good
Alyssa Edwards.

Coco, you're gonna have put
a little more pink

up in that eye.

Both: Girl, look how orange
you f*cking look, girl.

Ooh!
[laughs]

Bianca as Judge Judy
was pretty iconic.

Oh, that was... baloney!

That is correct, Judge Judy.

Not a match, Your Honor.

Baloney!

I love...

both: Opulence!

You own everything!

One of my favorite moments
was Ongina being so vulnerable

- and coming out as HIV positive.
- Oh, my God, yeah.

I've been living with HIV

for the last two years
of my life,

and this means so much to me!

[crying]
Oh, my God!

Ongina, you're an inspiration.

Thank you.

It was just an amazing moment
for the show

and, like,
for gay culture, period.

I'm sorry, Rebecca Glasscock
walking in in jeans

paved the way for me and Sugar

walking in
with our little miniskirts.

Rebecca Glasscock walked
so y'all could...

What do you do?

She walked so we could trot!

[laughter]

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[laughter]

♪ ♪

♪ Cover girl,
put the bass in your walk ♪

♪ Head to toe,
let your whole body talk ♪

[cheers and applause]

Wow!

Welcome to the main stage

of "RuPaul's Drag Race."

Michelle Visage,
do you know what today is?

Ru, can we talk?

I don't even know
what year it is.

[laughs]

Style superstar Carson Kressley,

do you know what today is?

Ooh, is it hump day, Ru?

I love hump day.

[laughter]

The incredible Julia Garner.

Welcome to our show!

Do you know what today is?

Just the best day of my life.

[laughter]

Thank you very much,
but that is not

the answer I was looking for.

[laughs]

Today is our 200th episode.

- Wow!
- Can you believe that?

You don't look a day over 100.

- [laughs]
- I agree.

And to celebrate, I brought
some "Cake & Candy."

- Hey!
- Hit it!

♪ Cake and candy ♪

♪ Cake, cake and candy ♪

♪ Just a little something
that I think I deserve ♪

♪ Cake and candy ♪

- ♪ Just swirl ♪
- ♪ Cake, cake and candy ♪

♪ Cake and candy ♪

♪ Cake, cake and candy ♪

♪ And it got my mouth
watering ♪

♪ At the thought of it ♪

♪ I should have a little bit,
but I want all of it ♪

♪ 'Cause I've been so good,
sweet tooth crying out ♪

♪ Want what I want,
and I want it right now ♪

♪ Cake and candy ♪

♪ Cake, cake and candy ♪

♪ Just a little something
that I think I deserve ♪

♪ Cake and candy ♪

♪ Cake, cake and candy ♪

♪ Cake and candy ♪

♪ Cake, cake and candy ♪

- Whoo!
- Oh, wow!

Yes, "Cake & Candy"!

- [gasps]
- Ooh, I love me some cake!

Oh, my goodness!

Did you make this
with your lovin' oven?

[bell dings]

[laughs]

Ooh, honey, I'm gonna have
to break me off a piece.

Ooh!

And now, for the 200th time,

it is my great honor to say...

racers, start your engines.

And may the best drag queen win.

[dramatic music]

All right, let's get
this Crystal Ball rolling!

Category is Start Your Engines.

Vroom, vroom.

Up first,
Mistress Isabelle Brooks.

The first category
is our interpretation

of RuPaul's famous racer outfit.

My racer suit
is fully embellished

with all the sayings
of every big girl

who's ever been
on "RuPaul's Drag Race."

I'm gonna read her.

- Okay.
- No, really.

Um...

[laughter]

Spice.

I took Ru's classic jumpsuit,

and I made it into a short,
little miniskirt.

I'm trying not to trot,

'cause I know Michelle
doesn't want me to do it.

But of course, I turn
my little flag, and it says,

"Ding-a-ling," because the boys

want to know
where my ding-a-ling go.

Luxx Noir London.

I chose to interpret

the RuPaul
iconic pink racer look

as, like,
an edgy motocross vibe.

It's a RuPaul tribute act,
for sure.

Marcia Marcia Marcia.

I've got my helmet in one hand,

my Rainbow Road Eleganza
on my body.

I am giving the judges supermodel.

I feel like Cindy Crawford, honestly.

Salina EsTitties.

You just like saying that.

Vroom, vroom!

I'm walking down the runway

feeling like that bitch.

Yeah, she's a little baggy,
'cause you know what?

She's a hip-hop girl.
California love, honey.

Malaysia Babydoll Foxx.

Baby, this car
got hydraulics, honey.

She goes up and down.

[laughs]

She's putting the ass in NASCAR.

[laughter]

Loosey LaDuca.

I chose to interpret
Ru's racer look

as Barbie on wheels,
Princess Peach,

and a female Speed Racer.

It also looks like
a crash test dummy

decided to be a sex worker.

Sasha Colby.

Oh, talk about
a moving violation.

Hey!

I'm giving you
if RuPaul had to cr*ck

the champagne bottle
off of the winning car

at the Monaco Grand Prix.

I feel like a million bucks.

♪ Stop ♪

The drug everyone's on, Anetra.

On this runway,
we're representing

Mom and Dad on both arms.

We have, on my father's side,

the Filipino and Japanese flag.

And on the left side,
we have the German side,

the Puerto Rican side,
the zesty side.

I feel very prideful in it.

Do not operate heavy
machinery when on Anetra.

[laughter]

♪ Stop ♪

Category is My Favorite Ball.

First up, it is Mistress,
the Balls Ball.

Resting beach face.

[laughter]

For my runway, my entire outfit

is made
of deconstructed beach balls.

I am the summertime girl.

Marcia Marcia Marcia,
the Bag Ball.

I chose the Bag Ball for this

because bags are made of fabric.

I made this look
entirely out of canvas bags.

If milkmaids were featured
in New York Fashion Week,

this is what they
would be wearing.

Malaysia Babydoll Foxx,
the Hair Ball.

Tonight I chose
the Hair Ball because, baby,

I'm a hairstylist,
and I knew that I would

slay this category.

Not "The Devil Wears Prada."
The devil wears hair.

Spice, the Ball Ball.

I chose furry,
fluffy pompom balls

because I feel
like a fuzzy little Furby.

Oh.

It's not the first time
she's spit out some balls.

[laughter]

Salina EsTitties,
the Money Ball.

Ooh, girl, you down with EBT?

I am a palm tree.

It's made of custom-made
food stamps

with my face on it.

Growing up, I was no stranger
to government cheddar.

There is no room for shame here.

Loosey LaDuca, the Bag Ball.

I've got a beautiful
flower crown

that's made out of the little
doggy poopy bags.

And I pull out of my bra
a little doggy bag

like I just picked up
after my puppy.

That's Puppy LaDuca.

[laughs]

Luxx Noir London, the Hair Ball.

This look is heavily inspired

by a Thierry Mugler collection
from the '90s.

My waist is whittled down
to a mere 20 inches.

Pain is beauty,
and I am the prettiest

on the runway tonight.

Sasha Colby, the Bag Ball.

I hate to be blunt,
but is that a bag of weed?

I am a full-on rhinestone bag

of grade A Colby kush, baby.

There's a big old red light
that shows that I am what?

Lit!

Anetra, the Sugar Ball.

I picked the Sugar Ball
because it was

the most unique
out of the balls.

I've got the lollipop on my hip.

I've got some gumdrops
on my waist.

I am loving these taffy titties.

So much sugar,
she gave herself "diabooties"!

[laughter]

[bell dings]

Category is
Crystallized Eleganza.

First up,
Mistress Isabelle Brooks.

Oh, my God!

Oh, look at the size
of those jewels!

- And by jewels, I mean her tits.
- Yeah.

[laughter]

I have the beautiful
beaded French crystals

on my shoulders.

As I raise my arms, I know
the light is radiating off

of them, as well as
the crystallized trim

on the bottom
that's just holding down

the perfect length.

She's not a whore.

- What is she?
- She's an expensive whore.

- Oh.
- Spice.

Takes a lot of disco balls
to wear an outfit like this.

My top is fully
disco ball realness.

Of course,
I want to trot so bad.

But I'm trying to be
a little bit more model-esque,

a little bit more
calm and subdued.

She's a baller.

She certainly is.

Marcia Marcia Marcia.

Let them eat cake!
Let them eat all of this cake!

Head to toe, I am
decked out in my crystals.

On my panty,
I have my brooch vaginta.

I'm looking like
a dreamy old stripper.

Yes, you cancan!

[laughter]

Malaysia Babydoll Foxx.

- You heard of Redd Foxx?
- Yeah.

This is Pink Foxx.

[laughter]

I am dripping in crystals

'cause anything that blings,
it's my thing.

Beaded for her pleasure.

Salina EsTitties, hail satin!

[laughter]

EsTitties was driving
down the PCH.

She took in the sights
of the palm trees.

Now she is at the Emmys.

It's very simple,
my lines are gorgeous,

and I look really pretty.

Crystals are
a queen's best friend.

Yes.

Loosey LaDuca.

Hey, Loosey!

Losing is the new winning.

[laughter]

For this runway, I wanted
to go with the concept

of a small-town girl who's won
all of her local pageants,

but this time,
she didn't get the gold.

Miss Garlic 1987 is my title.

And honestly,
I'm getting flashbacks

to episode one, okay,

and I'm not enjoying it!

Hey, Loosey, your ass is mint.

[laughter]

Luxx Noir London.

Ice, ice, baby.

My runway look is kind of
like one of those,

like, Swarovski trinkets.

It's so delicate
and so impractical,

but fashion is not meant
to be practical.

I'm wearing a piece of art.

Come on, Sugarplum Fairy.

[laughter]

Sasha Colby.

- Mm.
- Hawaii 5-Ho!

[laughter]

For my
Crystallized Eleganza look,

I am giving you
golden coral goddess

emerging
from the lava of Hawaii.

I own 51% of this tree!

[laughter]

Anetra.

- Ooh!
- Hello, Met Gala.

I thought this dress
was extinct.

[laughter]

I've got a full-blown
crystallized spine

coming out of this gown!

It looks dangerous.

It looks like it might hurt you.

But don't worry,
it's actually very, very...

I'm lying.
It's very painful.

It's worth it, because
it's so g*dd*mn beautiful.

She's a "triceratop,"
or so I've heard.

[laughter]

Welcome, queens.

I've made some decisions.

[dramatic music]

Marcia Marcia Marcia,

Malaysia Babydoll Foxx,

Luxx Noir London...

ladies, you are safe.

♪ ♪

You may leave the stage.

♪ ♪

Now it's time
for the judges' critiques.

Up first, Salina EsTitties.

The first look,
Start Your Engines, was fun.

You were wearing it,
and that's really important.

And then Money Ball,
what a great idea.

- Whoever is on those notes...
- It's her.

Oh, is that you?

'Cause it's like, I didn't know

Thomas Jefferson
was a cross-dresser.

Yeah.

So the details are all there.

But visually, it just looks
bulky and messy.

And then your Crystal Eleganza,

this is a tough fabric
to work with, that satin.

To me, it looks like it needs
to be pulled up a little bit.

[laughter]

Yeah, it needs that.

You do have
such a beautiful figure,

and I would love
to see more of that.

You always get so close, Salina.

And your personality
is what I'm in love with.

But I also want to be
in love with your drag.

All right, up next, Spice.

Your Start Your Engines look,

talk about nailing the details.

Having that checkered flag

with the ding-a-ling messaging,

and then there was
a checkerboard crystal detail

on the boots,
which was incredible.

Your favorite ball,
you did the Balls Ball.

It was cute.

I mean, we've had many people
do the hairball routine,

so it becomes redundant.

And this, the corset
on this is really cute.

The skirt is the piece
of fabric tied together.

There's no finished hem on that.

- Is that just cut?
- It's glued, hot glue.

I think the biggest sin
of the outfit,

for me, is that you took
the Balls Ball

and you just covered it
in disco stuff.

Oh, yeah, I didn't
make that connection.

Yeah.
[laughter]

I was like...

I think my favorite thing

about your whole
performance tonight

was watching you fight the urge.

Fight... yeah, you just...

You literally were like,
uh, uh, uh.

We could get her one
of those shocker collars

- and you can have the button.
- Literally!

I need to go zznt, zznt.

Up next,
Mistress Isabelle Brooks.

Start Your Engines was fun.

Catchphrases from so many
different queens.

This beach ball look,
it's iconic.

It's high drag.
It's really chic.

And then this,
you had the high art

and then you had
old Hollywood glamour,

and you just looked like a star.

It's all beautiful.

As the weeks go on,
Mistress, I keep getting

more and more impressed.

Thank you.

Up next, Loosey LaDuca.

Start Your Engines,
I thought was really fun.

It was kind of Judy Jetson goes
into the futuristic pit stop

and gets her chassis lubed
and all sorts of fun things.

What let me down tonight,
Loosey, was your Bag Ball.

I thought it was too simple.

It looked like an afterthought.

That whole skirt should have
been made out of plastic bags,

because then the bodice...
While it was pretty,

it was just St. Pauli Girl.

This look, I do love
that see-through quality.

For me, where it goes a little
south is that, you know,

mermaid detail at the bottom.

I would have lowered that trim
of stones an inch or two

to just give you more of that,
you know, mermaid shape.

All right, up next,

Sasha Colby
Carrington Zeta Jones.

[laughter]

In every look,
you look absolutely stunt-ing.

That first Start Your Engines look

was very elegant
but also very sexy.

When you went into your Bag Ball

and you were a dime bag,

I loved the details
of the blunt hat,

the giant weed
across the bodice.

It was just all
really beautiful.

And your Crystallized look is...

I mean, it's so stunning.

It looks like something that
would be from the Met Gala.

You know, Sasha,
you're also a success story

of the house system.

I know that you come
from the Colbys.

How did you find them?

I was really fortunate
to enroll in dance

when I was in high school.

And I was a closeted
Jehovah's Witness.

Scared to show... tell anyone
how feminine I was

or that I already felt trans.

And my q*eer family,
who are all dancers,

took me in,
took me to my first drag show.

And it saved my life.

And it's made this such a joy...

This life such a joy to live.

You do your house
very, very proud.

And sharing your story,
it lasts forever.

Thank you.

Last but not least,
Anetra is here.

Start Your Engines,
oh, my favorite color...

Neon green!

Actually, I loved
the way you wore it.

There's just a lot of details
that you do so well.

The Sugar Ball, for me...
You know,

the bustier thing, I wasn't
quite sure what that was.

Those were my taffy titties.

- Mm.
- [laughs]

It just looked
a little incomplete to me.

And then when you compare it
to what you have on now,

I mean, the fact that you
made this overnight

and you have the perfect
trumpet hemline,

the craftsmanship
is like couture.

It's gorgeous.

I don't think I've ever
seen a dress like that.

It's a beautiful silhouette.

But you've added this sort of
McQueen danger to it

with the shards
that looks like vertebrae.

I want to give you
a little note,

from one resting bitch face
to another.

No.
[laughter]

I already knew it!

When we're in drag,
we're in character.

So remember to tell your face
that you're having fun.

Mm.
You don't...

[laughter]
You don't have to think it.

But instead of looking like
you're gonna k*ll someone...

- I'm sorry.
- You can even smize.

Just remind yourself not to
look like the Deathly Hallows.

- Okay.
- Okay?

- Sorry.
- It's all right.

Thank you, ladies.

While you enjoy delicious
House of Love cocktails

and mocktails in the Werk Room,

the judges and I
will deliberate.

♪ ♪

Welcome back, ladies.

I've made some decisions.

[dramatic music]

Anetra, Sasha Colby,
Mistress Isabelle Brooks...

tonight you proved
that you earned everything.

♪ ♪

Sasha Colby,

condragulations.

You're the winner
of this week's challenge.

Oh, yay!
[applause]

You've won a cash prize
of $5,000.

I feel gagged
that I won a design challenge.

[laughs]

The three of you
may join the other girls.

Like, I won the ball.
I'm just over the moon.

I just feel invigorated,
like I could do anything

they throw my way right now.

♪ ♪

Loosey LaDuca, tonight...

you're a lovely third runner-up.

♪ ♪

You are safe.

[mouthing words]

♪ ♪

You may join the other girls.

♪ ♪

Salina EsTitties, Spice...

I'm sorry, my dears, but you
are both up for elimination.

♪ ♪

So here I am
in the bottom once again.

And now I have
to fight for my life.

♪ ♪

The time has come...

for you to lip-synch...

for your life!

♪ ♪

I actually know this song
a little bit

because me and Sugar
did a TikTok to it once.

I'm excited to have fun.

Good luck, and don't f*ck it up.

[upbeat music]

♪ One, two, three, four ♪

♪ Need a boy who can
cuddle with me all night ♪

♪ Keep me warm, love me long,
be my sunlight ♪

♪ Tell me lies, we can argue,
we can fight ♪

♪ Yeah, we did it before,
but we'll do it tonight ♪

♪ An Afro, Black boy
with the gold teeth ♪

♪ Your dark skin looking at me
like he know me ♪

♪ I wonder if he got the G
or the B ♪

♪ Let me find out and see,
coming over to me, yeah ♪

♪ These days,
I'm way too lonely ♪

Come on, Spice!

♪ I'm missing out, I know ♪

♪ These days,
I'm way too lonely ♪

♪ And I'm know
for giving love away ♪

♪ But I want ♪

♪ Someone to love me ♪

♪ I need ♪

♪ Someone who needs me ♪

♪ 'Cause it don't feel right
when it's late at night ♪

♪ And it's just me
in my dreams ♪

♪ So I want ♪

♪ Someone to love ♪

♪ That's what I really want ♪

Whoo!

Just glitter
and ball everywhere.

I was like,
you getting dangerous, baby.

[laughs]

♪ I want ♪

♪ Someone to love me ♪

♪ I need ♪

♪ Someone who needs me ♪

♪ That's what I really want ♪

♪ I want ♪

♪ Someone to love me ♪

♪ I need ♪

♪ Someone who needs me ♪

♪ 'Cause it don't feel right
when it's late at night ♪

♪ And it's just me
in my dreams ♪

♪ So I want ♪

♪ Someone to love ♪

♪ That's what I really want ♪

[laughter]

[cheers and applause]

Ladies, I've made my decision.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Salina EsTitties...

shantay, you stay.

Thank you.

♪ ♪

You may join the other girls.

[mouthing words]

♪ ♪

Spice, thank you
for spicing up our lives.

Oh, my Spicy.

Now, sashay away.

I just want to say thank you.

Being here, I know that now
I can stand on my own

and be the strongest one
as well.

Thank you.

[applause]

I may not know how to lip-synch,

but I do know how to trot.

[laughter]

Trot, girlfriend.

[laughter continues]

♪ ♪

I'm feeling
all the things right now,

but I'm mostly proud.

I know there's a lot more
for Spice and for me.

Well, I am Spice, but...

Love you, Sugar.

♪ ♪

Condragulations, ladies.

And remember,
if you can't love yourself,

how in the hell
you gonna love somebody else?

Can I get an amen up in here?

All: Amen!

All right,
now let the music play.

♪ A little bit of love ♪

♪ Goes a long, long way ♪

♪ Lifting you up
to a brighter day ♪

♪ Can you feel the love ♪

Next time
on "RuPaul's Drag Race"...

You need to conduct
one-on-one interviews

for TV's
sketchiest news magazine.

Get away from her, you bitch!

[laughter]

- Cuchi-cuchi?
- Cuchi-cuchi.

Grab the wheel!
Oh, my God!

[tires screeching]

[crash]

I know I definitely
stir the pot.

But I feel like I'm just saying

what everyone in the room
is thinking.

Loosey was trying to see
if I was gonna att*ck you

because there goes Loosey
being a bitch again.

Ooh!

If anyone is a bitch,

Mistress is the bitch.

♪ A little bit of love ♪

♪ Goes a long, long way ♪

♪ Lifting you up
to a brighter day ♪

♪ A little bit of love
goes a long, long way ♪

♪ Turn it around
when you up and say ♪

♪ Everybody say love ♪

♪ Love, love, love,
oh, love, love ♪

♪ Love, love, love,
oh, love ♪

♪ Whoa, can you feel
the love ♪