02x02 - Starrbootylicious

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "RuPaul's Drag Race". Aired: February 2, 2009 – present.*
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RuPaul plays the role of host, mentor, and head judge for this series, as contestants are given different challenges each week.
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02x02 - Starrbootylicious

Post by bunniefuu »

- Previously on

Rupaul's Drag Race...

- Hey!

[all screaming]

- Sahara and I have

been friends forever.

- I hope that I don't fall

into that role of babysitting

when I should be really, like,

cutting their bra straps.

- You must create

your best drag look

using just these curtains.

Oh-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

You have a child?

- I do have a son.

My son is, like,

my major motivation

for winning this competition.

- All right!

She is throwing

some serious 'shay.

Morgan McMichaels, you are

the winner of this challenge.

You will receive immunity.

- I don't f*cking

like being just safe.

- Mystique, based on your

unforgettable presentation,

I'm giving you

a get out of jail free card.

Sahara Davenport, Shangela,

the time has come for you

to lip sync for your life.

- Ohh!

- Sahara Davenport,

Shante, you stay.

Shangela, sashay away.

And tonight...

today, I'm gonna

give you a chance

to street walk

a mile in my shoes.

Wigs will fly.

- You stuck me with these

f*ckin' b*tches.

- And heads will turn.

- I think we might be

in trouble.

- Help me.

- With extra special

guest judges

Kim Coles and Dita Von Teese.

- [cheering]

- The winner of Rupaul's

Drag Race will receive

a lifetime supply

of NYX cosmetics

and be the face

of nyxcosmetics.com,

an exclusive one-year

PR contract

with the leading LGBT firm

Project Publicity,

be featured

LA Eyeworks' legendary

designer eyewear campaign,

and headline Logo's

Drag Race tour,

featuring exceptional

Absolut drinks

and a cash prize of $25,000.

And may the best woman win!

[alarm clock beeping]

- Walking into the workroom

this morning

was a little weird 'cause we

didn't have Shangela with us.

- Sahara?

- Yes, darling?

- Here's Shangela's face.

- Ohh!

What am I gonna do with it?

I'm trying to take the attitude

that it's a clean slate.

Trying not to have the weight

of what happened the other night

on my shoulders.

She's gone,

so we won't need this anymore.

This is now my station, guys.

[siren wails]

- Ooh, girl!

You got shemail.

Good morning, racers.

It's RuPaul here with your

drag-u-weather forecast.

- All right.

- This week, we can expect

a high-pressure system,

followed by storms of,

"Hell no!"

"Oh, no, she di'n't,"

and, "What you call me, bitch?"

but before this week is over,

I guarantee with 100% accuracy

somebody in here

is gonna make it rain.

All right?

Okay?

- Make it rain.

- Rain?

- Hey, girls.

[cheers and applause]

Now, today I'm gonna

give you a chance

to street walk

a mile in my shoes.

Oh, dear!

Today's mini-challenge

is a makeover,

where you'll be turning

a lady into a tramp.

The lady in question is me.

[gasps and laughter]

Or, as I like to say, mini-Ru.

[laughter and applause]

Now, as you girls see, there are

only six supermodel dolls,

so you'll be working in pairs.

And there's

an odd number of you,

which means one person

will be working alone.

Now take a moment

to choose a partner.

- We'll do it together.

- The Atlanta girls

are working together?

- Let's do it?

- Hell, yeah.

- Raven and Morgan?

- New York!

- New York?

Okay, yeah.

Tyra and Jujubee.

Jessica and Tatianna.

- I'm alone.

- Mystique works alone.

- Always.

- Ladies, you'll have



Feel free to use the materials

we've provided.

Now, when I return,

I want to see

these little ladies turned

into six bad girls

that work hard for the money,

if you know what I mean.

Are you ready?

Set...

go.

- My number one goal was to grab

the whole plate of fabric.

- Tyra and I ended up

with most of the stuff.

- We had got what we wanted,

and then let everyone

get our sloppy seconds.

- We did not get left nothing.

I got, like,

one handful of scraps.

Oh, my God!

- 30 minutes, bitch.

- Okay.

- I think her heel

should be broken.

- [laughs] Definitely, yeah.

- What about these boots?

- I think she needs

hooker heels.

- But I seen hookers

out there with boots on.

- I love working with Tyra,

but sometimes he just kind of

wants to do

what Tyra wants to do.

- The purse should

match the shoes.

- No, it shouldn't match

the shoes, diva.

- These are not heels.

These are rhinestones.

- She's tucked real good.

[laughing]

I think what I'm gonna

miss most being here

and not in Atlanta is

the fact that I won't be able

to spend day-to-day time

with my son, Lucas,

who's 3 1/2, and I miss him.

We play every day.

- Hello, dolly.

- Uh-oh!

- Wow! [laughs]

- Where's the glitter?

Where's the glitter?

Where's the glitter?

- You use all my glitter.

- Yeah, I'm sorry.

- You tramp.

- Work.

- Glue these shoes on.

- Okay, ladies, time's up.

It is time to reveal

your makeovers.

- I got Shaquanda here.

- Uh-huh.

I call her

a broke-down stripper.

When she want to be naughty,

all you got to do

is turn her around,

she's ready for access.

- Hey!

- With her nice little

rose tattoo.

- Tatianna and Jessica.

- This is both of us.

She's got my eyes, but her lips.

- What is this doll's name?

- Wild Whore.

- [laughing]

- Wild Whore.

- Pandora and Sahara.

- Our girl is called

Shafreeforal.

She's had a little bit

of a rough night.

She has lost her shoe.

[RuPaul laughing]

- Her other heel is broken,

but she still has

the heel in her hand.

She hasn't lost it.

- It's her good shoe.

- Yes.

- Sonique

and Nicole Paige Brooks.

- Well, you said

it could be a bad girl,

so the baddest bitch we know

is my drag mother

Shawna Brooks,

so she's styled after her.

- Wow, look at that.

- Yes, with the matching boots,

and always one titty out.

- Tyra and Jujubee.

- This is Cherry.

- Oh, Cherry.

- Yes, ma'am.

- Oh, wow.

- And she has one tooth missin'.

- That's okay, girl.

Is that a skirt?

- Um, it's a skort.

- Look, she is dealin'

cr*ck back here.

- More hair to comb,

more cheeks to powder.

That's all it is.

- That's right.

That's what we tell her.

- Morgan and Raven?

- This is Lady Mayhem

from the House of Chaos.

- Gorgeous,

look how cute that is.

- Just a little, tiny thong

with a nice sequined strap.

- All right, ladies,

that was quite the show.

The winning team is...

Pandora Boxx

and Sahara Davenport.

[applause]

Miss Shafreeforal.

- Shafreeforal won!

- Congratulations, girls.

Now, this week's

main stage challenge

is inspired by my feature film

Starrbooty,

where I play

an undercover hustler.

Word, holla, hey!

And a diva is a female version

of a hustler.

This is your chance to unleash

your inner pussycat doll

and to show us that you can use

your brains and your beauty

to make it rain.

In two teams,

you'll be competing

as burlesque dancers.

You'll be judged on your ability

to work as an individual

and in a group.

Pandora, Sahara, since you won

the mini-challenge,

you are team captains.

Pandora, who do you pick first?

- Uh, Morgan.

- Ooh, yay.

- Sahara?

- Jessica.

- Jessica!

- Sonique.

- Jujubee.

- Raven.

- They was going after the girls

who are skinny

and go out there naked.

I'm not all, "Oh, my God,

they didn't pick me,"

cry, cry, cry.

No, it's not my personality.

This ain't high school.

- Tyra.

- Tyra?

- I wanted to be

in Pandora's group.

She had all the tall,

skinny, pretty b*tches.

- Tatianna.

- Tatianna!

[applause]

Sahara, your choice.

- We're gonna go with Mystique.

- It's all about the titties.

- And that leaves

Nicole Paige Brooks.

- Save the best for last.

I was picked last, which I was

really surprised about,

to be honest.

- Nicole was left last

because this is a sexy contest,

and she's not sexy.

- In a moment, you'll meet

two top burlesque performers.

They're gonna give you

a crash course

in pole dancing,

with poles provided

by Platinum Stages,

plus each team

will be responsible

for styling

your burlesque outfits,

using materials courtesy of

Michael Levine Fabrics.

Gentlemen, start your engines,

and may the best woman...

win!

- We're gonna go with one print

'cause they don't match.

- I know they don't speak,

but it fits.

A girl in this on stage,

a girl in this, a girl in this,

a girl in this, and then another

girl in that,

and then that'll go fine.

You get what I'm sayin'?

- I don't like that.

I want us all to be in the same.

We're gonna all be in the same.

- Guys, we really need

to work as a team,

'cause I'm gonna

get frustrated.

Tyra's being difficult.

"I want this, I want this,"

it's all about her.

- Can I say something,

team captain?

- Sure. What is it, darling?

- This red fabric

that you chose?

- Uh-huh?

- It's shitty.

Like, really shitty.

- Tyra!

- Do you guys need a extra

person in your group?

- We're tired of all

your bitching out there.

- Pandora?

- Yeah?

- Do you not like me?

You didn't choose me

to be in your group.

I was hoping and praying

that you would choose me.

- I'm sorry.

- Now, look, you stuck me

with these f*cking b*tches.

- Oh, my God, I am in a group

with, like, Satan's baby.

- Our challenge

is to create a burlesque act.

We're getting

pole-dancing lessons.

- Today, we're going to be

teaching you a few basic tricks.

- Oh, Lord.

[laughing]

Here we go.

- Gorgeous.

[applause]

There was a lot of vag*na

in my face. [laughs]

I was like...

- Ladies, this is dropping it

like it's hot.

- Oh, my God!

- How do expect me to do that?

It doesn't move on me.

- Well, so who wants

to get started?

Any volunteers?

- La-la-la-la-la!

I'm a flexible bitch

that can drop it like it's hot.

We gonna get on the pole

and do a upside down butterfly,

just have fun with it.

- Oh, yeah!

Oh, yeah!

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah!

Ohh!

- Wow!

- Very good.

- Whoo!

- Wow!

[applause]

- [laughs]

That ain't sexy.

I want to try that again.

Your titties

are distracting me.

- I'm sorry. They...

that's what they're there for.

- Nicole is really sexy

and really sexual,

so I'm not really worried

about being, you know,

a tease,

'cause it's kind of what I do.

- Release and spin.

Much better!

Very good.

See?

That was awesome.

- Nicole cannot bring sexy back.

- Anybody else?

Come on, girl.

- Tyra, go.

- I can't.

- Oh, Tyra, go.

- I cannot do that.

- You have to do something.

- The way that I learn

is by watching others do it.

I'm not going to get up there

and just use

someone else's ideas.

- I'm the group leader,

and we all know

that the group leader's

the first one to go down,

so I am just hoping and praying

that everyone pulls through,

especially Miss Tyra.

Now how you guys feel

about the dancing?

Are y'all gonna be

okay with that?

- I feel like a whore slut.

- Is that a bad thing?

- Yes, that's a bad thing.

- But you're a bad girl,

remember?

- But I'm a bad girl,

I'm not a bad slut.

I feel that pole dancing, um,

it's kind of a little ho'-ish.

- I think we should just be

very positive about it,

and then it'll all come

together.

- It's fine,

as long as everyone cooperates.

There's no "I" in "team,"

after all, right?

- But there's a "me," girl.

- So far, I'm not quite clickin'

with the choreography,

just 'cause I want someone

to really, like,

slow it down for me so I get it.

- Pandora's just kind of

standing off to the side.

She's not really doing much,

so I tell Morgan,

"Girl, you should

choreograph this."

- I'm not trying to be bitchy,

but if you want, like,

choreography done,

like, let us do it.

There was a lot

of confusion going on,

and the time was

running out.

- I'm not reading you, by any

means, but you know what I mean?

Like, it's so confusing.

- Yeah, I mean, I'm just trying

to set it up at the beginning,

that's it.

- I went into shut-down mode

for a little bit,

because everybody

was just talking,

and it was very frustrating

and irritating.

I was like, "Oh, Christ."

- The two weakest people

should be in the back.

- Yeah.

- That's just an opinion.

- Okay, well,

let's just practice this,

and then as we figure out

who the weakest is

we'll move 'em around.

- Okay, let's try this.

Ready?

- I could be a bigger bitch.

- So can I, girl.

Miss Tyra decides that she

can't rehearse in heels.

- Are you gonna have me

rehearse like this?

You're gonna have me complainin'

about my feet hurtin'.

I know how my body works.

- Five, six, seven, eight...

- I'm just sitting back.

I'm puttin' everything

together in my head.

I'm sayin', okay, girl,

do this and do that.

Like if they asked me now,

"Girl, do the routine,"

I would do it,

and I'd do it better

than what they did in there.

- We need to pick a color

that's gonna work.

- Well, if they're

not using this,

I think we should use this.

It's the most colorful,

and it's just sitting here.

- Do we need

to find out for sure

if they're not using that?

- No.

- No, they said they're done.

- 'Cause they're doing

that right there.

- This'll be hot.

- I think this is gonna pop

with black, I really do.

- Hey, that's our fabric.

She just took all our fabric.

- Because it's our fabric,

honey.

- I could have swore

you guys said

you were done with your fabric.

- No, we had all our fabric

over here that we were using.

Sorry you misunderstood.

- No, there was

no misunderstanding.

I have ears,

and they hear very well.

- No one's here to share.

We're not here to help.

We're not even here

to be friends.

- Did you need this fabric?

Well, do you need it,

or do you not need it?

- Hey.

- You owe me one.

- Thank you, darling.

- Cute, by the way.

I love them.

- Are you tryin' to be

fierce to me, Miss Tati?

- No!

I think they're cute.

- Just makin' sure, girl.

Just makin' sure.

- You think a lot, don't you?

But you think wrong

all the time.

- I do.

- You should think harder.

Thank you.

- Hi.

Hello, hello, hello.

Wow, look at this.

How's it going so far?

- I think it's going good.

- And do you feel like

you're really the leader?

- Um, I didn't

at a certain point, no.

I think that there's just

a lot of strong personalities.

- Really? Here?

- Just a few.

- Among drag queens?

- Do you feel as though

you've been an effective leader

for your team?

- Most definitely.

I think the end result

will show that as well.

- So you're okay that

one of your team members

is over there sleeping?

Are you worried?

- I am worried.

I am worried.

- Mm-hmm.

- What am I to do?

- Well, it's, you know,

hard out there for a pimp.

- Don't wake her up.

She'll scream.

- Tyra, sweetie.

Darling?

Sweetie pie.

- Tired.

- You're tired?

- Yeah.

- Why you so tired?

- I don't know.

When Ru woke me up,

I'm like, "sh*t!"

- Now, why do you think

everybody else is so busy,

but you have time to nap?

- Um, they're hot-gluing.

- Uh-huh.

- And I sewed, and it took me,

like, five minutes

to make my costume.

- You know,

you will be judged on

not only your individual,

but how well you work

with the group.

- I'm good.

I'm perfectly fine.

I don't have any doubt.

- All right, get back to bed.

All right, girls,

one last thing before I go.

Now, I'm gonna take you all

on a little field trip tomorrow

to Dragonfly.

It's a hot Hollywood club,

where you'll be performing

your main challenge

in front of an audience

of 100% grade "A" men.

Beef, honey. Beef.

Now, I want you to make sure

to bring your charisma,

uniqueness,

nerve, and talent.

Bye, y'all.

See ya.

[applause]

- I'm excited to get out

and it be a room full of men.

I can't f*cking wait.

- Hey, girls,

welcome to Dragonfly.

This week,

Santino, Merle, and I

are joined by our

special guest judges,

one of my favorite funny ladies,

Kim Coles is here.

[applause]

And our extra

special guest judge,

the queen of burlesque,

Dita Von Teese.

[cheers and applause]

Now, in a moment, the team

that makes the most money

will be safe

from elimination this week,

and the girl on that team

who earns the most

will be the winner,

but first, what would

Rupaul's Drag Race be

without a little twist?

Today, you'll have two ways

to earn those dollars, honey.

While one team is working on

this stage,

the other will be

selling it on the street.

You hear that, Tyra?

Not you.

I'm talkin' about Tyra Banks.

[laughter]

- I hate goin' out the door

in drag in the daytime.

- And by "it," I mean cherry pie

gift certificates.

Cherry pie

gift certificates, sir,

courtesy of Cafe Audrey.

And one more thing.

Don't f*ck it up.

- We have 60 minutes to sell

some cherry pie

gift certificates.

Help me out, buy some pie.

Team strategy is to get

out there and sell, sell, sell.

- Hi, would you like

to buy a cherry pie?

- Please, please,

don't make me beg.

- Please!

I need money!

- Does anybody want cherry pie

gift certificates, $5.

I don't know how

to approach people.

No?

Do you understand me?

Can you hear...

am I here?

Anybody?

Bueller?

- Buy the pie, baby.

Buy the pie. Please buy the pie.

- I think we might be

in trouble.

- Please help me.

- We're confident.

We're the pretty girls.

We're gonna sell sex, and isn't

that the name of the game?

- Nicole was having difficulty

with the choreography.

Big and messy

is not gonna cut it.

[cheers and applause]

[applause]

- I made a lot of money.

It rained on me a few times,

and I like to be wet.

- While I'm on stage,

I'm so incredibly nervous.

My heart is going

"Whum, whum, whum."

I feel like my boob's

gonna pop right out.

[cheers and applause]

- And as you pick up

crumpled money,

it looks like a lot more

than it is.

I realize it didn't rain.

It was enough to buy

a nice dinner

at the sizzler or something.

- Cherry pie.

all: Cherry pie!

Cherry pie!

- Oh!

Also I can do that for you.

- I got a dollar.

- Thank you, yay!

- Here's one dollar.

- Thank you.

- Thanks a lot.

Thanks.

- Ooh.

Watch your...

think soprano, though,

when you talk, girl.

- Hi, would you like to buy

a slice of cherry pie?

We got cherry pie

gift certificates!

- Tyra's surprising me,

actually.

I'm like, wow,

she actually has a personality?

- Hi. Would you like to buy

a slice of cherry pie?

- $5...

thank you, sir.

- You're welcome, okay.

- I looked like a $2 whore.

My grandmother's gonna k*ll me.

What you want?

- Let me see you guys

do a dance for this $20.

- Okay.

- I see her from the corner

with a $20 bill,

and I'm like, "Wait!

That's mine."

- Oh, yes!

- Miss Sahara, you stealin'

this sale from me, girl?

- The audience really

kind of got into it.

[cheers]

- They were all loving it,

eating out of

the palm of my hand.

I felt kind of like

I might have been

the skankiest on stage.

- I'm a nervous wreck

being in front of Dita.

She's the epitome of burlesque,

and there she is,

lookin' at you, you

know, judgin' you.

- We went out onto

Hollywood Boulevard,

and we're trying to sell

these gift certificates,

and there's Christians

and children and...oh.

I'm not cut out for this.

- You know you want

a taste of cherry pie.

- Nicole was loud.

- I'm serious, it's right there.

You're almost at Audrey's.

You know you want the pie.

- Raven, I always just kind of

saw her standing like a statue.

- You guys want to buy

cherry pie.

I can tell you love cherry pie.

- Sonique is rude.

- How much money do you have?

- Uh...

- Yes?

- Uh, well, I have some...

- You're wasting my time.

I got an hour.

- My time is expensive, too.

- All right, well,

then hit it, 'cause so is mine.

- Hey, daddy.

Nobody wants cherry pie?

- Morgan, she's like,

"Hey, daddy."

La-la-la-la.

- We like pie.

Do you like pie?

- Cherry.

- Cherry pie.

- I don't like

to carry myself like that.

I'm sweet in the streets

and, you know,

a freak in the sheets.

- Cherry...

pie.

- I look over at the judges,

and Dita Von Teese

was smiling, honey.

You can't cr*ck her.

She sits there with this just

straight face, just beauty.

- All of our arguing

and bitching

and nagging at each other,

like, finally paid off.

- I feel excited.

I'm going to work that crowd.

- Whoo!

- Ow!

- I think I did a great job,

because I have a lot of money.

- Yeah!

- My strategy for my solo

is just to wow the crowd.

[cheers]

- Sellin' cherry pie.

Come and get it.

- Hello.

I love your hat.

- [pretending to cry]

Please, somebody buy cherry pie.

They just were running, running.

- You guys like cherry pie?

- He's running.

He's running from somebody.

They're like,

"Aah! It's a t-girl!

It's a t-girl!"

- Because I can't dance,

I figured I'd be sexual

and playful.

Every girl needs lip gloss,

right?

[cheers and applause]

- I'm thinking, do whatever it

takes to get your money.

[cheers]

[kicks stage]

- My strategy is to demand money

from the men.

- I hope it pays off.

- Ow!

- [sighs]

Are you tired?

- Very much so.

- Elimination day is today.

Everyone's on pins and needles

because no one knows

how to measure

the other team's work,

so we're just anxious

to see who's on the bottom.

- Somebody stole

my mommy's picture.

I walk in the room,

and, you know,

first thing I'm thinkin' is,

got to say hello to Shawna,

my drag mother,

and she's not on the wall.

I've been robbed!

If anybody sees a 8x10

of Shawna Brooks,

maybe it got set

on their station by accident,

'cause it was on this wall

yesterday and now it's gone.

Being away from my family

was more than

I thought it was, you know?

I have a 2 1/2-year-old, Lucas.

He's at home,

and I miss him the most.

- Are y'all gonna

let him watch the show?

- When he's, like,

four or five maybe.

Hopefully, there'll be

an appropriate one to show him.

I'm just hopin'

that he's proud of his life.

Gonna be able to show him

I am at the top of my game.

He should be proud of what

his daddy does for a living.

He's gonna be able to say,

"My daddy's a drag superstar."

[laughs] You know?

- You guys still have

all your fathers, yeah?

- My father has cancer

right now, so...

- Oh! Mine...

mine passed away of cancer.

He had lung cancer.

- I don't really know...

I mean, we don't know

how long he has.

My father was just diagnosed

with cancer.

He's, you know, on chemo

and going through all of that.

- My father was always

just really upset about it,

because he knew

he was gonna die,

and he didn't know how we were

gonna take care of ourselves.

- So sad.

- Yeah, I mean, it is,

but just this, Pandora.

Just tell him you love him.

That's all.

I don't want to talk

about this anymore.

- I don't, either.

I gotta put makeup on,

and I don't want it to smudge.

- Yeah, okay.

-There's a lot

of mixed emotions.

There's a lot of feelings

going on around the room.

People are wondering

which group's gonna be

up on the chopping block,

but still,

at the same time trying to hurry

and get ready

for the main stage.

[applause]

- Well, hello, judges.

- Hello.

- Hey, Ru.

- Have you recovered

from yesterday?

- That was insane.

- Oh!

- I thought it was fantastic.

- I enjoyed it very much.

- I wish my whole life

could be that.

- You wish your...

- I do. I do.

- Now, this week, the girls

were split into two teams

of burlesque dancers to see

who could earn the most dollars

dancing for tips and hustling

with cherry pie gift

certificates.

Tonight, I've asked them

to come decked out

in their high-class drag.

Are you ready, judges?

- Yes.

- Ready.

- Gentlemen...

start your engines,

and may the best woman win.

Sonique-a-nique-a-nique-a.

Oh, she's making a Sonique boom.

[laughter]

- With the lights goin'

and the music goin',

it was perfect,

so I hope they think I did good,

because I felt like

I did pretty good.

- Yes, ma'am, sell the garment.

Oh, my, this dress is wicked.

Are you a good witch

or are you a bad witch?

- When I head up my runway

and I feel like a diva.

- Almost looks like

toilet paper cozy.

[laughter]

In a couture sort of

toilet paper cozy kind of way.

- [gasps]

Wow, dark lady.

- She will take your man, honey.

- Yes, she will.

- I wanted to do something

simple that I could dress up.

I know I look fierce.

- I'm callin' that Cher 2010.

- Yes.

- Sahara, oh!

Stop in the name of love.

- [laughing]

- I feel great.

I'm sparkling,

the judges are smiling.

- Bob Mackie would be proud.

- I'm just livin', honey.

- Pandora Boxx.

- The shoes match the dress

kind of like the carpet

and the drapes.

- Yes!

- I like that dress because

it's a little bit different,

and I really thought that

it would make me stand out.

- Very L.A.

I came out to L.A.

to be an actress-slash-model.

- Actress-slash-model.

- Jujubee!

Is this a hostile takeover?

[laughter]

- I felt like Eartha Kitt.

I'm servin' fish, honey,

and this ain't trout.

- Jujubee Fabulous!

- Nicole Paige Brooks.

- She looks like Courtney Cox.

- I looked like a real girl.

I looked like a model

on the runway,

which anybody wants me to model

their dress, sign me up.

I'll be more than happy

to do it.

- Yes, mama!

- Mystique Summers Madison.

Girl, your p*ssy is on fire!

- Oh!

- My outfit for the runway

is a nice, simple kind of

evening gownish,

'cause I'm a gown bitch.

- That girl will eat Beyoncé

in one swallow.

- [laughing]

- And she is telling you,

"I'm not going!"

- Send me Morgan McMichaels

from the secretarial pool.

- I didn't want to wear a gown.

That's boring to me when

everybody else is doing it.

- Oh, executive realness.

- [laughs]

Executive realness.

- Oh, my sweet gherkins!

There's a new Tyra in town.

Tyra Sanchez, the other Tyra.

- I know I looked good today,

because it was elegant,

it was over the top,

and it was still drag.

It gave you everything

you needed.

- I love the nappy pompadour.

- Yes, mama.

Tatianna Von Furstberg

Zeta-Jones!

- [laughing]

- She's giving Galliano

realness, yes.

- The look I'm going for

is Rihanna going to prom,

so I did the little

Rihanna bob with it.

I'm feeling pretty confident.

- Very real.

Ladies, it's time to reveal

which team made the most money

and is safe from elimination.

And the winning team is...

Sahara Davenport's team.

[applause]

Congratulations.

You're all safe.

The winner of this challenge

is...

Sahara Davenport.

[applause]

In addition to immunity

next week,

you've won a $1,500

gift certificate

from sequinqueen.Com.

Thank you, ladies.

Now you may leave the stage.

[applause]

Pandora Boxx, your team is up

for elimination.

What went wrong?

- I think maybe we just

didn't work the crowd enough

or something.

Now, let's talk about

your presentation

on the main stage today.

- I'm not loving

the overall look.

Visually, though, I thought

maybe you could have

pulled the parts together

a little better.

- This dress is not my favorite,

either.

I'm not a fan of the bands.

It kind of looked...

at first, I thought,

what was it, duct tape?

[Santino laughing]

- Thank you, Pandora.

- Thank you.

- Sonique, now, you really

made it rain on the stage,

but you came off

a little bit rude

on the street.

- My time is expensive, too.

- All right, well, then hit it.

- I was rude to, like,

one or two people,

but, I'm sorry,

it was hot out there.

I was in a hurry.

I was trying to raise

as much money as I could.

It was a challenge. You would

do the same thing, right?

- I do sassy,

I don't do bitchy.

Nicole Paige Brooks.

Now what are you serving

on the main stage?

- This was actually just

a backup that I brought,

because the first gown I had

technical difficulties with.

- I thought, more than anyone

when she walked out,

I was like, "Whoa! Is that

a real girl over there?"

And I like your little Megan Fox

tongue thing that you did,

but don't do it too much

like she does,

or else it loses effect.

- You could have looked like

a young Janice Dickenson,

but it came off

kind of like a drunken

Janice Dickenson at times.

- Ha-ha!

Our next lady is Tatianna,

a vision in purple.

How do you feel your hustler

game came through

on the challenge yesterday?

- I think it worked pretty well.

- One thing I really noticed was

one of the guys

asked your name

when you were done.

Nobody asked

anybody else's name.

They were fallin' in love

out there.

I called you Kim Kardashian

on steroids.

- Ooh, yeah.

- But in a good way.

- Yeah.

- In a good way.

Kim wished she looked that good.

- Raven, doin' the solo.

You didn't make

a lot of money there.

- No, I didn't.

When I started seeing

the other girls come back,

I thought, "f*ck,

I f*cked this up."

- What would you

have done differently,

knowing how it went?

- I wouldn't have moved as much.

I would have gone

to the edge of the stage,

laid out, and let them

just throw the paper on me.

- Lady ATM.

[Santino laughing]

- You're very femme fatale.

I was a little bit scared.

I would not leave my man

in a room alone with you.

- Don't do it.

I'll work it.

[laughter]

- Morgan McMichaels.

- Yes.

- You have immunity.

- Yes, ma'am.

- You know, in a minute,

I'm gonna have to send

someone home.

Who should it be and why?

- The weakest person in the

group, you know, is Tatianna.

- Tatianna, who do you

think should go home today?

- I'm just gonna go with Morgan,

because she has immunity.

- Tatianna, that's an answer

for the Miss America contest,

not the Rupaul Drag Race

contest.

Nicole, same question.

- Send 'em all home.

- Send all these b*tches home?

- Ooh!

- Okay.

Send all these b*tches home.

- I mean, they eventually

all have to go,

so, I mean, I don't want

to be the one who goes,

so send 'em all.

- Raven, who would you

send home tonight?

- I would say Tatianna.

I don't think she wants to be,

like, a grand, superstar diva.

I think she's comfortable

being a beautiful girl.

- No.

- [laughing]

- Not the case.

If I was comfortable

being a beautiful girl,

I was a beautiful girl at home.

That's not why I'm here,

to be, like, pretty.

- Okay.

- Thank you.

- Just my opinion.

- All right.

Pandora, who should

I send home tonight?

- I think that the ho that made

the least amount of money

should go home.

But I don't know who that is.

[laughter]

Ladies, while you enjoy

an Absolut cocktail

in the Interior Illusions

lounge,

the judges and I will

deliberate.

Thank you.

[engine starts]

This is the hardest part.

They're all fabulous kids,

but one of them has to go home.

Nicole Paige Brooks brought in

the least amount of dollars,

and Raven was second to last.

Raven seemed like she was

out of her element.

- The performance wasn't

my favorite performance,

but I think today she was

really exciting to watch.

- Had I not talked to her,

she was gonna be my bottom two,

but I like that sense of humor,

I like that little edge.

I'm not ready to see her go yet.

- Right. Now, Tatianna.

She's green.

- When I saw her dancing, I was

like, "She's the prettiest one."

- Do we give her the opportunity

to blossom on this show,

or do we say, "Look, honey,

you got to come prepared."

- She's gorgeous, however,

she didn't know how to make

her disadvantages

her advantages,

and everybody else here does

seem to know how to do that.

- Let's move on to Sonique.

- I definitely sort of sensed

a little, you know,

sort of feminine sweet like,

"I know I was kind of bitchy

to people on the street, but I

won't ever do it again, 'kay?"

- [laughing]

- Pandora was actually one of

the team's top money earners.

- She didn't stand out for me.

- I know you didn't like

her outfit.

- I hated that outfit.

- I equated it to, like, she

just got off the Greyhound bus.

Maybe that worked

to her advantage.

Maybe people like to see that

kind of starving, hungry look.

You know, maybe that's why

she made so much money.

I don't know.

- So she may not give

kind of great ass,

but she gives great sass.

- Yes.

- I just like her

sassy attitude.

- Nicole Paige Brooks.

She got a little lost

in the crowd. Do you agree?

- I do agree.

[imitating steady tone beeping]

That's death

in this competition.

- I kind of like the highs

and the lows.

The kind of bipolar.

To me, that makes life richer.

- Sure.

- And I'm just getting Prozac.

- Silence!

Bring back the girls.

Welcome back, ladies.

Based on your Starrbooty-licious

challenge

and tonight's presentation

on the main stage,

I have made some decisions.

Morgan McMichaels,

you have immunity this week.

You're safe.

- Thank you.

- Sonique, on stage, the crowd

was turned on by your body,

but on the street, people were

turned off by your mouth.

No one wants a cherry pie

that bites back.

You're safe.

Nicole Paige Brooks,

you brought in

the least amount of money.

I'm sorry, my dear,

you're up for elimination.

- I was surprised I was

the lowest earner of tips.

I really thought that my

exuberance on the street

would have pulled me

out of the bottom.

- Pandora Boxx, you're safe.

- Thank you.

- Raven, you were the second

lowest earner,

and in a moment, you'll have

a chance to prove yourself.

You're up for elimination.

- When she told me

I was up for elimination,

my knees locked,

my head got dizzy.

I literally thought

I was gonna pass out.

- Tatianna,

sharpen your claws, baby.

It's a jungle out there.

You're safe.

Two queens stand before me.

I've consulted with the judges,

but the final decision

is mine to make.

This is your last chance

to impress me

and to save yourself

from elimination.

The time has come

for you to lip sync

for your life.

Good luck, and don't f*ck it up.

- And now,

it's time for a breakdown.

[laughter]

- Oh, yes!

[cheers and applause]

- I've made my decision.

Raven...

you will live to fly

another day.

Shante, you stay.

- Thank you.

- Congratulations.

- Thank you.

- Nicole Paige Brooks,

you are a fabulous queen.

I send you home to carry on

the fine tradition

of the Atlanta queens

who have come before you.

Now, Sashay...

away.

- Thank you.

Thank you.

The fact that I even

walked through these doors

is overwhelming to me,

and definitely didn't think

I'd be leaving this soon.

I'm ready to go home

and see my baby.

- Ladies,

you know competition is hard.

Ain't no half-steppin', mama.

You have to bring it.

That's what we're here for.

Now, remember,

if you can't love yourself,

how the hell you gonna

love somebody else?

Can I get an amen?

all: Amen.

- All right.

Let the music play!
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