02x08 - The Hankover

[bunniefuu]

HANK: Previously
on Royal Pains.

ADMlNlSTRATOR:
You let a billionaire
hospital trustee die

to save some kid
off the street.

l made a judgment call.
You made a mistake.

EVAN: This trip
is going to get you
back on your feet.

HANK: What trip?
To the Hamptons.

ls this an
arranged marriage?
Yes.

Do you want to
marry him?

This is a very bad omen.

Where's your ring?
Divya, that's a bad sign.

Stop it.

lt looks like
your family clinic

won't be up and running
until about 2015.

A new proposal.

You want HankMed
to run your clinic?

Dr. Emily Peck.

Are you sticking around?

l'm setting up
my own concierge
practice here.

What are you
doing here?

l was called
to see a patient.

You snooze, you lose,
Dr. Lawson.

[SlGHlNG]

No sudden moves.
This thing
could flip on us.

lt worked last night.

You have
impressive balance.

Well, l was
highly motivated.

l think l owe you one.

Do you always
keep score?

[CHUCKLES]

Hey!

Thanks for nothing,
Doc. Now my nose
won't stop bleeding.

[SEAGULLS SQUAWKlNG LOUDLY]

Wow.

[SlGHlNG] Yeah.

Mmm. Now, that...

ls what l call
a bridal tea.

[LAUGHS]

l really did it.

lt's subtle.

Uh... As tattoos go.

Come on. lt's a
teeny, tiny flower.

Raj will love it.

l got the same, right?

Right.

[HELlCOPTER BLADES WHlRRlNG]

[GRUNTS]

You've got to come.
Right now.

l'm kind of busy here.

No, this can't wait.

The stripper
stole my van.

And l think
l k*lled Raj.

You led with the van?
Come on.

EVAN: l just don't get it.

She usually insists
on picking you up.

Raj is in town this week.

They're having breakfast.
l told her l'd meet her here.

And now, he's made her late.

She's not late yet,
so it's not our business.

Plus, she's leaving early?

l'm sorry.

Divya's not comfortable
unless she's at 1 10%.
You know that.

l know that.
l don't think Raj
gets that about her.

l'm sorry.
Who's marrying her?

You or Raj?

[SlGHlNG]

And she's not leaving
early because of him.

Her mom's throwing
a bridal tea
at the Plaza in Manhattan.

Raj isn't even invited.

Still. lt is
an arranged marriage.

Like, what if Raj
takes her for granted?

lt's not fair to
judge the guy.

We hardly know him.

That's when l do
my best judging.

l'm going to confront her.
No, you're going
to drive away.

You're going to
drive away.

And she and l
are going to work.

Goodbye.

On the phone,
he complained
of chronic sinusitis.

He's suffered
for the past year.

Ooh, that's rough.
Hmm.

He has a prescription
from his doctor
in the city, but...

No, no, no, no, no.
l'll make that call.

No, l'll tell you why.

Two reasons.
One, l'm the CEO.

And two,
see my first reason.

Sorry to keep you.
Ms. Katdare?

Hmm. Pleased to meet you.

Mr. Keller,
this is Dr. Lawson.

Ken Keller.
lt's nice to meet you.

l hope you're packing
some serious pain relief,
Doc.

Uh, yeah.

Uh... So,
you've got sinusitis?

Yeah, it started,
uh, out of nowhere
last summer.

l've always been
healthy as an ox.

Horse.
Hmm?

Anyway. Head back?

Thanks. Okay.

Does that hurt?
Mmm-hmm.

Good. Yeah.
Paranasal sinuses
are inflamed.

Where do you
feel the pressure?

No, it's not pressure.
lt's pain.

lt's...
lt's in both cheeks
and behind my eyes.

Mmm-hmm.
Runny nose?
Yeah.

Discharge, either green
or bloody?
No.

Halitosis?

No one's called me out.

Right. But then again,
who would? l mean,
you're the CEO.

Bend over for me?

Does that make it worse?
Yeah, a lot.

HANK:
Does the pressure migrate?

Again, it's pain.

Huh. Wow. lnteresting.

[CLlCKlNG TONGUE]

Okay. Mr. Keller,
you can stand up now.

[GROANS]

Corticosteroids help?

Yeah, these do. A bit.

l will write you a refill.

And we can administer
a dose now

to give you some
immediate relief.

Oh. Yeah. Sure.

Okay. What was that about?

What? The guy bugged me.

How?

By stealing my lunch money
and my lunch.

Copying my homework,
cheating off my tests,

ransacking my locker,
and breaking my nose.

All that happened
when l was using his bathroom?

lt happened in junior high.

l see.

And he didn't even
recognize me.

l mean, l was sure,
as time went by,
he'd get what he deserved.

And it didn't have
to be federal prison.

You know, l would have
been fine with bald and broke

and still stuck living
in Passaic.

Well, looks like
he's done okay.
Yeah.

But then again,
so have you.

l never told anyone
that he hit me.

But l promised myself
that one day
l'd return the favor.

What, and break
his nose?
Well...

Well, thank goodness
you've outgrown
that adolescent fantasy.

Yeah. Yeah.

Let's schedule a follow-up.

Hey, guys.

Hey.
Hi.

You know what?
l'm really sorry.

We already have all
the Mary Kay products we need.

Shut it. Hey.

Aren't you going into the city
with Divya?

Well, l was,
when l got a phone call
from someone

who l thought could be
our first clinic patient.

You mean the clinic we haven't
officially started yet?

Yeah. But it sounds
like a good test case.

A dislocated shoulder.
Those are pretty
painful, right?

They are, indeed.
Can Divya wait?

She'll pick me up there.

Nice. Let's go.
Okay.

Wait, wait. Guys.
None of this can happen

until l have data
for a use-of-proceeds
analysis,

mapping out a service area.

Well, you can wait here
for the data to come
visit you,

or you can join us and get it
boots-on-the-ground.

Now, or after this
cartoon ends?

Let's go.

Because it...

[EXHALlNG]

HANK: That should numb you up.

How did this happen?

ln the gym.

All right. Come down
on the floor.

Easy.

HANK: Okay, down.

[GROANlNG]
Okay.
Okay.

l know.
There you go.
Okay.

Okay.

Okay. This might hurt
a little.

[BOTH GRUNTlNG]

Yows.

[SlGHS]

You okay?
Yeah. [LAUGHS]

That feels a lot better.

Good. Here.
Let's have a seat over here.

Easy.

All right.

You have got
a high pain tolerance.

Oh, yeah.

That's a talent of mine.
l can smile through anything.

No, seriously.
Most people would have
called 91 1 .

Or screamed loud enough
that someone else would have.

Like, wow.

And instead,
you get to be our first
concierge clinic patient.

Yeah, how does that work?

How does that work?

Uh... Well, we're still
in an exploratory phase,

rendering services
on a limited basis

that are billable
to a non-profit fund
that l have set up...

[STAMMERS] Jill, you're going
to bore her to death.

And then we will actually
have to call 91 1 .

Hi. Uh, we didn't meet before.
l'm Evan R. Lawson.

l'm Michelle.
l'm the CFO of HankMed,

as well as whatever
this clinic thing is.

Um, are you
currently employed?

l used to be full time
at the Parks
and Rec department.

But with the economy now
l'm part time.

l lost my benefits,
and Aqua-robics

for Elders and Others
is just a memory.

Come on.

EVAN: So, would clinic care
be something you'd
use regularly,

or on an as-needed basis?

As-needed, l think.

Okay. Final question.
Are you a fireman?

What?

Oh. No, that's my
roommate's portable pole.
She's a dancer.

[PHONE RlNGlNG]

Uh, excuse me. Sorry.

Yeah. No.

Portable pole.

God bless America.

''Have pole, will travel.''

[EXHALES]

Well, look at you,
all Jackie O.

Ooh. You going
to a tea or a funeral?

Come any closer,
and it can be both.

We'll still be on time,
won't we?

Sadly, yes.

Well, let's go.

Bye, guys.
Bye.

l just had
a brainstorm.

l didn't think
storms could occur
in a vacuum.

Dude.
So, the ladies
are off to tea.

Mmm-hmm.
l just got a business card
from a stripper.

Right.
And Raj is here alone.

Okay.

The universe is telling us
to throw him a bachelor party.

Funny, l didn't hear
the universe say that.

No. We have to
conduct due diligence
on Divya's behalf.

All right?
We owe her that.

You said it yourself.
We don't even know this guy.

Yeah.
We could have dinner
and get to know him.

Dinner?
Yeah.

Anyone can negotiate
the perils of dinner.

You want the true
measure of a man?

You don't eat with him.
You drink with him.

Mmm-hmm.
And then
you drink more with him.

And then
you ogle with him.

You can't
ignore it, Henry.
lt's Karma.

You mean coincidence.

No, actually.
l mean Karma.

Oh.
Yeah.

Do you have any idea
how long we've been here?

Two hours and
43 minutes.

Oh, 44.

Divya, you're not
wearing stockings.

Your sister's
wearing stockings.

Of course she is.

Just keep your legs
under the table.

[GLASS CLlNKlNG]

Sorry. May l have
everyone's attention?

As you know,
a marriage does more
than unite two people.

lt joins two families.

And it pleases me
to no end

to see two such
wonderful families

being brought together
by Divya and Raj.

My dear sister, Divya,

may you and Raj be
as blessed as
Sanjay and l have been.

With a marriage
based on love,
honesty, and respect.

[CELL PHONE RlNGlNG]

Divya!

Mother, it isn't me.

Oh, sorry.
lt's me.

Oh. Sanjay caught
an earlier flight

and needs me to go
pick him up at the airport.

l'm so sorry.
Duty calls.

You'll learn that
soon enough,
chhoti behen.

Maybe we can tag along.

l mean,
l never get to see you.

Divya, you can't
leave your own party.

l love you.

Bye, Jill.
Bye.

You know,
the party's breaking up
anyway, isn't it, Mummy?

Saya and l barely spoke
in the last two hours.

Forty-six.
And 46 minutes.

You know what?
lt would be nice to have
the drive to talk.

All right. Go ahead.
Be sisters.

Thank you, Mummy.

Just walk quickly,
so people don't
see your legs.

Hey, Saya!

We have been
liberated.

We can join you.

Except l'm not
going to the airport.

Then how is
Sanjay going to...
Sanjay's in Miami.

We're looking at
a co-investment on a property,
and they need me.

Now.

You lied.

Mother would never
let me go, otherwise.

You know how it is.
You have to fight family
with family.

Oh. That's my colleague.

Forgive me?
Of course.

l take it you guys
aren't so close.

We used to be.

Even though
she was Saya the Saint,
and l was Divya the Difficult.

You were
the difficult one?

So. Shall we get
the car from the lot?

Huh.

We paid
a $65 flat rate.

Welcome to Manhattan.

What's your point?

My point is,
let's get our
money's worth.

HANK:
Well, do you want to
trust the lnternet,

or do you want to
trust me?

Okay. Okay. Just...

Mr. Keller, l'll be by
in the morning.
Goodnight.

How do we explain to people
that Wikipedia does not have
a medical degree?

We could refer them
to HankMed.com,
which does.

That's actually
a really good idea.

[KNOCKlNG ON DOOR]

Come in.

Hi. l'm Karma.

Oh.

Well, hello, Karma.

Didn't you say
your roommate was
the dancer?

Yeah.
Yeah,

l'm never really sure
how people will react.

l'm really only doing this
to make ends meet.

Okay.
Where's your sling?

l heard that
once my shoulder felt okay,
l could just lose it.

Where did you hear that?

Wikipedia.
Oh.

Oh, hey,
after you guys left,
l had an idea.

lnstead of
a private dancer,

l could call myself
a concierge dancer.

lt's classy, right?

Very.
lsh.

So, my pole is set up
in the big house.

But if l'm going to be dancing
for all those other people,

l'm going to have to
charge more.

All what other people?
Evan.

What?

Well, l said Raj could
bring a few friends.

[DANCE MUSlC PLAYlNG]

HANK:
Well it looks like
he brought them all.

DlVYA:
Could you wait here?
We'll be right back.

lt's a little late in the day
for an homage to Audrey.

lt is never too late.

And this is where Raj
bought my beautiful ring.

Oh.

Meter's running,
baby girls.

You want me to get that?
Would you?

ARlSTOTLE: Let's make you
look beautiful, okay?

On three.
One, two, three.

Ow.

So, where to next?

Whoa. Hold on.
l've got to find
a nightclub.

You don't need Time Out
for that, sweet thing.

You've got Aristotle,
the philosopher king
of New York City nightlife.

Time Out ain't going to
tell you about the best clubs
in the Meatpacking District.

Uh-huh.

These are not
the best clubs.

These clubs pay
to be called the best clubs.

No integrity.

l get my 41 1
right from the source.
The doormen.

And they don't
give you anything
for bringing people in?

They better.
Aristotle got to make
something on the deal.

[CELL PHONE RlNGlNG]

Oh. Sorry. Hello?

Saya.

Okay, slow down.

Okay, didi.
Didi.

Call 91 1 .
And l'll be right there.

Okay.
How quickly can you
get us to Tr*mp Tower?

Hop in!
Let's go!

JlLL:
Divya, what's going on?

DlVYA: That was my sister.
She said that there's some
medical emergency.

ARlSTOTLE:
That fast enough, Doc?

JlLL: You could have just said
it was next door.

Aristotle got to make
something on the deal.

Yeah.

We were doing
some paperwork,

and suddenly,
Frank couldn't breathe.

[WHEEZlNG] Come here.
Okay.

Frank, inhale normally,
but exhale like you're
blowing into a balloon.

Divya, he's
turning blue.

Did you call 91 1?

Uh-huh.
He's anaphylactic.

Jill, dump my bag.
There is an EpiPen
in there.

[BREATHlNG HEAVlLY]

Thank you.

Do you have any clue
what could have caused this?

No.
No.

SAYA: ls he okay now?

He still needs to go
to the hospital.

l smell coconut.

Did you use
a new soap or lotion?

Uh, yeah, l did.

l will write you
a prescription
for prednisone.

Thank you.

Oh.

You saved his life.

Well, you're welcome.

[SNlFFS]

Saya, you smell
like coconut, too.

lt was my lotion
he borrowed.

Saya.

You're not wearing
any stockings.

[DANCE MUSlC PLAYlNG]

Dieter.

Hey. Listen.
About this party...

Yes, l took the liberty
of supplementing
your brother's guest list.

You did?

Mr. Kuester von
Jurgens-Ratenicz

is in quite good spirits
in Cuba.

He said
to consider this evening
a token of his appreciation.

Wow.
Uh, thank him for us.

Hank. Look.

lt's k*ller Keller.
From the old neighborhood.

Oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You were my patient
this morning.

l didn't realize
you were the same
Ken Keller.

l didn't realize
you were the same Hank.

Those were the days, huh?

We're doing sh*ts.
Yeah.

We are so
doing sh*ts.

So, what are you
doing here?

Oh. Uh, my buddy's father's
law partner's banker,

he knows this guy
named Boris.

No, l meant you're sick.

You should go home,
rest, and get
plenty of fluids.

Like l said
on the phone.

Yeah. Yeah.

So.

Now you know how to
make an arranged
marriage work.

You mean one based on
love, honesty, and respect?

lt's the one that lives
in the real world.

l have my life,
and Sanjay has his.

Trust me.
lt will be the same
for you and Raj.

At least you've had practice,
hiding your career.

[HlP-HOP MUSlC PLAYlNG]

So, you like
living in London?

Very much.
lt's a wonderful city.

Hmm.

Would you say
it's a good place
to party?

Oh, yes.
lf you know where to go.

Yeah. Do you?
Do you know where
to go to party?

Do you like
to party, Raj?

Are you hitting on me?

Well, well, well.

Apparently, they'll let
anyone into this party.

Nice pole.
When do you go on?

Later on.
l like to wait for
the high rollers.

Mmm-hmm.

Uh, no, Evan
wanted to organize
a little bachelor party

for Divya's fiancé.

But it sort of
got out of hand.

Aren't bachelor parties
supposed to get out of hand?

Good point.
Good point.

So, who is
the man of the hour?

Karma.

That would be me.

Well, it is time for
your private dance.

So, you won't be
needing that.
Yeah.

You set him up.

Yeah, l realize that now.

l can't believe it.
Saya was my role model.

l thought
if she could make it work,
so could l.

Divya.
You're not your sister.

And your marriage
won't be hers.

Okay?

What are you doing?

l'm calling Raj.

[HlP-HOP MUSlC CONTlNUES]

[CELL PHONE RlNGlNG]

Hey.

l am new at this,
but l'm pretty sure
that doesn't happen often.

What took so...
What?

What is it?
Are you all right?
ls everything okay?

Yeah.
Uh, everything's great.
lt's just...

lt's a job thing.
You wouldn't understand.

Oh.

Well, back to work.

Yeah. Back to work.

Hey, Raj. Buddy. Raj?

[TEXT MESSAGE BEEPS]

Feel better?

Yeah.

Hey, baby girls!
Everything okay?

The prognosis
looks good.

Well, l'm back on duty
if you need a lift.

What do you say?
You want to
call it a night?

No. We came here
to celebrate.

And that's what l
want to do.

Oh, that's my girl.

Let's go.

All right.

Ladies, it is my belief
that a repeat cab fare
is never a coincidence.

lt's karma.

The universe has
brought us back together
for a reason.

You're a doctor, right?

Physician assistant.

Can you
write prescriptions?

lf they're warranted.
Why?

My wife has been on me
about getting a checkup.

l've got no time.

Uh... And?

l've got acid reflux
like something severe.

ln about 20 minutes,

this kielbasa is
going to be
all kinds of trouble.

Okay. Tell you what.

She'll give you a checkup
if you drive us
around the city

and show us the nightlife.

But first,
put that sausage down.

[SlGHS]

Where to, ladies?

Wherever people go
for a good time.

[ROCK MUSlC PLAYlNG]

You're not enjoying this?

No, no.
l appreciate
her technique.

But l relocated
her shoulder
this morning,

and l'm nervous about
the stress
she's putting on it.

KEN: Hey, hey! Oh, yeah.

Whoo!
Look at you, girl.
Look at you.

Uh, didn't l tell you to
go home, rest...

And get
plenty of fluids.

Yeah.

Come here, baby.

Hey. Hey.

[ALL EXCLAlMlNG]

Oh, my nose.

Now, that's karma.

Oh.

Has the bleeding stopped?

Thank you.
Not yet.

Any neck pain?
Change in vision?

Numbness or tingling
in the arms?

No. But it really hurts
when l breathe.

ls it broken?

Um.

That would be a yes.

l am so sorry.
You can send me the bill.

Unless this could be
one of your free clinic
thingies.

Yeah. Sure.

Listen, baby,
why don't you go get me
another drink, okay?

How many have you had?

Like, five or six.
Why, you going to cut me off?

On the contrary,
you need the anesthesia.

You're not going to
reset his fracture
right now, are you?

l am.

Don't you think it's advisable
to wait for the swelling
to go down first?

ls it?

Not with a deformity
this markedly displaced.

He can't breathe through it.

He has a mouth.
So do l.

And while it thanks you
for the second opinion,

this fracture needs
realigning now.

Okay.
But let me just ask you.
ls this going to hurt?

[SCREAMS lN PAlN]

Oh.

What were you going to ask?

Never mind.

l've arranged a car
to transport the injured
gentleman home.

Thank you, Dieter.

This whole night
has been a disaster.

Does that include
what happened
with Raj, Karma?

What did happen
with Raj?

Confidentiality is
the first rule

in any good
concierge business.
You know that.

Mmm-hmm.

But l do need to find him.
We have
unfinished business.

Yeah.

lf you require it, sir,
there are certain rooms
in the manor house

which, for certain reasons,
are equipped with
audiovisual surveillance.

And that's one of them.

ARlSTOTLE: Here we go!

[CLUB MUSlC PLAYlNG]

Aristotle.
What are you doing?

Hydrating.
The First Lady says
it's important.

Well, try hydrating
with water.

Ugh.

A proper diet is
the best treatment
for acid reflux.

Okay. Okay.
Are you guys
going in or not?

l don't want to be a downer,
but they'll never let us
in there.

DlVYA: Why not?

Because we're dressed
like their mothers.

l know just the place.

And it's open late.

Oh, my God.
Sex and the City
is in the house.

Let's go.

Move! Move!
l've got to go!
Please!

JlLL: l think that's our cab.

Where's Aristotle?

ARlSTOTLE:
Whoa! Whoa!
Hey! Hey! Hey!

DlVYA: There.
Ah.

Hey. Sorry to break
your strides, Jillya.

Just had to, uh,
pay my respects.

Lovely.
So, Kiss and Fly or
Hogs and Heifers?

Are you always drinking?

You can't drive
like Aristotle drives
without working up a thirst.

And do you
go frequently?

l drink, l go,
or l explode.

You know, let's find
a 24-hour pharmacy.

You may have something
other than acid reflux.

Uh-oh.

l don't know.
l thought that would be
more satisfying.

l mean, resetting a nose
is better than breaking one.

But the guy didn't even
remember bullying me.

So, it doesn't really
count as payback.

Okay.
First of all, really?

You waited 20 years
for payback.

Well, no.
l mean, l wasn't waiting.

But, you know,

you only get
so many opportunities
in life to fix the past.

So, when one presents itself,
don't you try to take it?

Oh, Hank.
You never get to
fix the past.

All you can do is
get as far away from it
as possible.

Oh.
About second-guessing you
on fixing that fracture.

Oh, yeah.
No need to apologize.

l was going to ask
where to send my bill.

l'll tell you where
you can send it.

[LAUGHS]

You know,
you're cute when you
think you're right.

So, are you going to kiss me,
or are you going to
wait 20 years?

[WOMAN SlNGlNG]

You're kidding me.
So, the good news is
no acid reflux?

l know that diabetes
isn't welcome news.

But once you get
your blood sugar
under control,

you will feel a lot better.

You are not your diagnosis.

My cousin has
the Sugar D's.
l know the drill.

You need to get
a proper glucose test
after an overnight fast.

l don't know
Manhattan facilities, but...

But Jill has connections.

Yes, l do!

What are we talking about?

The future.

Ooh, l'll drink to that.

To the future.

Whoo!

EMlLY: You have
impressive balance.

HANK: Well, l was
highly motivated.

l think l owe you one.

Do you always
keep score?

[EMlLY CHUCKLES]

Hey!

Thanks for nothing,
Doc. Now my nose
won't stop bleeding.

HANK: You were right
to come back.
This bleeding concerns me.

Are you leaving?

l think l probably should.

Uh, dinner later?

l'm too busy for dinner.
Too busy to date, really.

Though l might have
some time later
for a little cardio.

HANK: What am l,
a 24 Hour Fitness?
Excuse me.

Oh. Sorry.

Well, if you were,
l might consider joining.

Though l don't like
long-term contracts.

l'm sorry.
Do you two want
to be alone?

Oh. Right.

What are you doing?

A ring test.

The paper absorbs
each drop as it spreads.

What are you looking for?

That.

Wow. Nice call.

Wow, what?

You're not just bleeding.
You're leaking
cerebrospinal fluid.

l'm what?

My guess is the nose fracture
broke your cribriform plate.

lt's a slow leak,
but we should do a CT.

Unless you want
a second opinion.

What he said.
Thank you.

Hank.
You've got to come.
Right now.

JlLL: All right, Aristotle.

Come on, buddy.
Rise and shine.
We owe you breakfast.

And our life savings,
it seems.

Aristotle.

Aristotle.

He stopped for donuts.

Okay. Aristotle?

Help me get him
on his back.

Aristotle, can you hear me?
Aristotle.

JlLL: Yeah, l've got a male,
mid-30s,
in hypoglycemic coma.

No, the paramedics
were 10 minutes out.
We couldn't wait.

Hey, are they ready
with fluids?

Standing by.
We're pulling in now.

[TlRES SCREECHlNG]

NURSE:
Okay. Got it. Back seat.

l'll get the front.

Okay.
Bring him out.

Middle-aged male,
sugar binged after
a 290 glucose, four hours ago.

Probably DKA,
but need to rule out HHS.

All right, all right.
Calm down.
Just tell me what happened.

Okay.

l couldn't find him.
Mmm-hmm.

l couldn't find Karma.

l looked everywhere.

Okay.
And while you were looking,

you were probably
getting hammered.

No, l...
lt was a party.
l had a couple, okay?

Okay.

And then l saw them.
Together.

[SCREAMlNG]

l mean, l...
Maybe he's breathing.

Maybe he's just
in a vegetative state.
l don't know.

Oh, my God.

Funny you should
mention vegetables.

What's that?

l don't think it's blood.
l think it's Bloody Mary.

Raj? Wake up, bud.

Hey.

Oh, man.

Who drinks Bloody Marys
at night?

Bad idea.
Never again.

Raj, did you fall?
Can you remember?

lt's foggy.

l recall
Evan coming to
tell me something.

[SCREAMlNG]

Oh, my God.

RAJ:
I think you'd had
too much.

Not that l judge.

l also didn't know
when to stop.

Mmm-hmm.

l must have passed out
with a drink in my hand.

Okay.
Mystery solved.

l have a patient to see.

That doesn't explain Karma.
What happened to Karma?

What happened to Karma?

What happened
to Karma, Raj?

She went home?

She went home.
Congrats, buddy.

HANK: Set.

[MACHlNE HUMMlNG]

Okay. Lie still,
and we'll see
what's going on.

Hey. This is,
uh, something strong
for those of us

with regrets
about last night.

No regrets.
No regrets.

But, uh,
thanks for the coffee.

EVAN: Yeah.

Good movie?

l don't know, yet.
l'm going to find out.

Dr. Peck?
Come take a look at this.

Did you ever get
poked in the eye, Ken?

With two older brothers?
l can't count the black eyes.

They used to
bully me nonstop.

Mmm-hmm.
What is that?

Wait. This...

l think l can
diagnose this one.

Dude, did you ever
fight with your brothers
over action figures?

Yeah, that was
one of our favorite
pastimes.

Like, uh,
knights or pirates?

Yeah. They almost
poked my eye out with, uh,
Blackbeard's little cutlass.

KEN: My favorite,
and they lost it.

Yep. They didn't lose it.

lt went through
the corner of the eye

and got lodged right there
in your sinus cavity.

What?
That can happen?

Yeah, l've seen worse
in the ER.

There's no way.
There's no freaking way.

l've had a sword in my eye
for 20 years,
and l didn't know it? Come on.

Not your eye, your sinus.
lt's a cavity full of air,
surrounded by bone.

The sword has been
sitting in that space,

leaving the bone, nerve,
and blood vessels undisturbed.

Oh, l'm plenty disturbed.
l've got a sword in my head.

[ALL LAUGH]

We'll get this checked
at the hospital,
[CELL PHONE BEEPS]

but l'd say we've
found the cause
of your sinus pain.

l'm going to
kick their asses.

l am so going to
kick their asses.

That tiny piece of plastic

ate away
at your cribriform plate
over the years.

l bet you've been
leaking spinal fluid since
your sinus pain began.

So, what you're
saying, Dr. Lawson,

is that if someone had
broken Mr. Keller's nose
years ago,

this would have
been discovered,

and he'd have been
spared a lot of suffering.

Yeah.

Yeah. l mean, yeah.

l just wanted
one last hurrah.

Guess l owe you girls.

lt's mutual.
The meter's still running.

Ah, it's no problem.

Really?
Yeah.

lf you don't have cash,
l take Visa, MasterCard, Amex,
Discover, Macy's, Costco.

Whatever, you know.

Because Aristotle got to
make something on the deal.

Yeah, baby.

All right.
We'll check in
on you later.

We have got to
get out of these clothes.

Yeah. Before anyone
besides my entire ER staff
sees us.

Oh.

[CAMERA CLlCKS]

Mr. Keller.
Oh, my gosh, your nose.

Yeah, that's the least of it.

Wow.
Hank.

You didn't.
Oh, it was Karma.

So, rough night?

You first.

Um...
Well, um...

[PANTlNG]
Evan. The other doctor
said you'd come here.

Other doctor?

Divya.
Good morning.

ls something wrong?

l hope not.

But l remembered,
at the end of
last night's festivities,

l took a certain liberty.

You know, Raj, uh,
l don't think now is the time.

Festivities? Liberty?

Your colleagues
threw me a...

Why are you
dressed like that?

Like what?

Right. Raj, um,
what's on your mind, pal?

lt was not my place,
but l allowed Karma
to borrow your minivan.

[EXHALES] Why?

l was drunk.

You were drunk?

No, l mean,
why did you give her
my van?

She needed to leave.
There were no taxis.

You know what it's like
here on the weekend.

ARlSTOTLE: No taxis?

Maybe l should
relocate my ass
out to the Hamptons.

What do you think, Jillya?

Who is that?

Aristotle.

l thought l remembered Karma
going through my pockets.

Karma?
The woman they hired for me.

To dance.
She was a dancer.

She was the dancer.
Okay.

What happened last night?

Well, we're still trying to
get to the bottom of that.

But not before everyone has
a shower and a nap.

Or maybe better we leave it
at no questions asked.

HANK: Yeah.
Or that.

Oh?

lt was a long night.

l'll call you later.

See you, man.

Bye, Raj.

Okay. Yes.
Shower. Nap.
Great idea.

We should go.

Bye.
JlLL: Take care, guys.

ls this the beginning,
like Saya said?

Let's just
get you home.

l don't want separate lives.

l know.

Hank.

Thank you for everything.

Hey, l'm just glad
we caught it.

l owe you an apology.

l, uh, l knew exactly
who you were
the minute l saw you.

l was, uh, embarrassed
because of how l treated you
back in the day.

l was a d*ck.

And you're a decent guy
for not saying anything.

Don't worry about it.
The truth is
l'd completely forgotten.

All right, let's go.

See you.

EVAN: l'm just saying.
l think he crossed the line.

Either he crossed the line,
or she did, and he let her.

Assuming you're right,
then, yeah.

Yeah, that does
sound suspicious.

So, what would you do
if there was video
of what happened?

[LAUGHS] What?
There's no sense answering...

Because there is.
And l've got it.

What?
Yeah.

Boris has
a surveillance system.

He does? Where?

ln rooms where he
conducts business.

Oh. Okay.

So, what do we do?
Do we watch it?

No. No.
People should be allowed
their privacy.

You mean their secrets.

Fine. Their secrets.

So, what do you
make of Emily?

Uh, l don't know.

l'm still feeling her out.
You know.

What do you think?

l think she's got
your medical skills,
my social ones,

and she's hotter
than either of us.

That spells danger
to me.

All right.
Now you're being
overly suspicious.

l'm not being...
l'm being protective.
Okay?

This is HankMed
we're talking about.

Excuse me?
Hello.

Hi. l'm just
returning these to Evan.

Sure.
l can give these to him.

You must be Karma.

You must be Divya.

Well, l don't know
if you're smart, or lucky,
or both.

But congratulations.
He's quite the catch.

So, this is a sort of
backup plan?

Hey... Oh, my God.
No, no, no, no, no!
Give me that! Hey, hey!

That's mine. That's mine.
Have you no respect
for privacy?

Oh, said the man who has
security footage of my fiancé.

l know. Look.
All right.
Just give it up, Ev.

Come on. That's...
Give... Shh.

Easy.

I'm in the hotel business,

and we're looking for
fitness instructors at
one of our local properties.

I could make a call,
ifyou'd like.

Are you kidding?
Oh, thank you.

I'm sorry.
I got glitter
all over you.

Oh, that's all right.
[LAUGHS]

I hope your bride knows
how lucky she is.

Ah. I'm the lucky one.

Most women like her
would enjoy
a life of leisure.

But Divya is brilliant
and kind,

and dedicated to
helping others.

And so,
I'm dedicated to never
taking her for granted.

Well, it sounds like
you don't want a dance.

[LAUGHS] Oh, no.

But please,
don't tell Hank and Evan.

They're so nice.
I'd hate for them to think

nothing obscene
happened in here.

I promise.

Thank you.

Saya was wrong.

Hmm?

[SEXY MUSlC PLAYlNG]

What? What is this?
Who is that?

Oh, my God.

Oh, yeah.

[HANK LAUGHS]

EVAN:
l vaguely remember this.
Look.

That's...
l'm actually
not that bad.

You're actually
not that good.

No.
Don't quit your day job,
there, Cinnamon.