04x07 - Driving Miss Lazy

[bunniefuu]

I got it, y'all. I got it.

I got my driver's license.

Oh, my goodness,
Eddie. Look at you.

You look so cute
and cheesin' and stuff.

Hey, hey.

Congratulations. Oh!

You'll be the only kid on
the bus with a driver's license.

Oh, no, no, no, baby. My
bus-riding days are over.

'Cause I'm buying a car now.

Oh! Eddie's getting a car!

All I need is $300.

Eddie ain't getting no car.

Oh, hear me out. Y'all, look.

I got $100 stashed up.

Now, if each of us
Chip in a hundred,

we can each have our own car.

Huh? What are we
gonna do with a car?

We don't even have our license.

Don't worry 'bout that.
I'll do all the driving.

I don't know. These things
don't normally turn out right.

Oh, look. We'll
own the car equally.

Huh? Huh?

And if any problems
come up, we'll just vote.

Majority rules.

I don't know.

Well, I don't know.
Rae, think about it.

The 3 of us, riding along, enjoying
our freedoms, singing to the radio.

♪ I gotta get you back ♪

♪ I gotta see this through ♪

♪ I gotta get you back ♪

♪ if it's the last thing I do ♪

Oh, my goodness, I just
had the best vision ever.

The 3 of us were riding along, enjoying
our freedoms, singing to the radio.

Where have I heard that before?

Because you just said it,

and now she saw
it, so let's just do it.

What do you say?

We're in! We're in!

We're out! We're out!

Too late. This baby is all ours.

That part's yours.

Let's go.

♪ If you could gaze
into the future ♪

♪ future, future ♪

♪ you might think life
would be a breeze ♪

♪ life is a breeze ♪

♪ seeing trouble
from a distance ♪

♪ yeah ♪ go, Rae!

♪ But it's not that easy ♪
♪ oh, no ♪

♪ I try to save the situation ♪

♪ then I end up misbehavin' ♪

♪ ohh, whoa, oh ♪

♪ hey, now, say now ♪

♪ 'bout to put it down, yeah ♪

♪ come on and ride
with the break now ♪

♪ and the future
looks great now ♪

♪ and everything's
gonna change now ♪

♪ all right, all right ♪

♪ that's so Raven ♪

♪ it's the future I can see ♪

♪ that's so Raven ♪

♪ it's so mysterious to me ♪

♪ that's so Raven ♪

♪ it's the future I can see ♪

♪ that's so Raven ♪

♪ it's so mysterious
to me, yeah ♪

yep, that's me.

Driving in my car,
looking like a star.

What did you guys do to her?

We primped our ride.

Oh, I was just gone for an hour.

I went to go get
some racing stripes.

Oh, cute, but I think the
color's gonna clash with the fruit.

Oh, yeah.

I cannot drive in a
pink car covered in fruit.

Ok. Ok. Ok. Ok. Maybe
we went a little too far. Hey.

Let's do the right thing
and put it to a vote.

Thank you.

All right. All in favor
of how the car is now?

Yeah, oh.

All opposed?

Majority rules,
Eddie. Car stays pink.

- And fruity.
-

hey, hey, let's go to the mall!

Oh, yeah.

I don't wanna go to the mall.

Wh-what? All in favor?

Just forget it.

You know, Eddie, this
voting thing, great idea.

Check outside.
See if I lost 'em.

Man, lost who?

The girls.

They've been following
me everywhere.

Can I hide out here
until it wears off?

Till what wears off?

That's my new smell-good.

Magnetic.

Hold on, hold on.
Are you telling me

just dab on some of this cheap Cologne
and the hotties won't leave you alone?

Didn't you read the
label, my brother?

Mag... netic.

Stanley, whoa, whoa,
whoa, man. Hey.

Where you going?

To pour this down the sink.

A man can only take
but so much loving.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
Stanley, Stanley, Stanley.

Hey. Let me take
it off your hands.

Hmm, eech.

Let's say you do
save me from all of that

kissin' and huggin'.

I could sell it to you
for about 40 bucks.



And a treat of cheese sandwich.

You know what? You better find
yourself another sucker, sucker.

Nah. You're right.

You couldn't handle all
those beautiful women anyway.

Look, man, what kind
of cheese you want?

Muenster. I like muenster.

Ok.

This is the fourth
mall we've hit today.

When are we gonna do
something I wanna do?

You know, like go
to the batting cage.

Ooh, batting cages.
That sounds interesting.

All in favor?

All opposed?

Be right back.

Man!

Aah!

Eddie! We scored big time.

What took y'all so long?

Well, I saw these


and I couldn't decide whether to
get 'em in lavender or periwinkle,

so I got both.

And I got some great
deals at the camping store.

Look at this. Got a flashlight.

And some camping rope.

And, oh, you guys, look.
I got this new ski mask.

It's so cool.

Aw, man, it's defective.

Oh. Never mind.

Can we please go to
the batting cage now?

Or we could go to the country.

Oh, the country. I'd rather
go to the batting cages.

Right. Well, let's
put it to a vote.

Who wants to go to the country?

Where there's a great
little country store.

Huh?

That sells really
cute accessories.

Huh?

Um, and they're all on sale!

Aah!

Love it! Love it!

Guess what? Everybody buckle up.

To the country, Edward.

Hey. Hey. Oh, that's my phone.

Hallo.

Man, what is in that
Cologne you sold me?

I'm being chased all over town.

Another satisfied
sucker. I mean customer.

Ok, I'm being chased by dogs!

You said I'd get
chased by girls.

I may have said that.
Choo, I say a lot of things.

Stanley, I'm not
playing with you.

Ok, calm down.

Maybe it's your body
chemistry. Did ya sweat?

You know what? I'm sweatin' now.

You hang in there. I
gotta get back to business.

Hey, make 'em bling this time.

You know what I'm saying?
Put a little Rasta on my fingertip.

Oh, man!

Bye, doggies.

Man, dogs on both sides.

Stanley!

See? Isn't this better than
some silly ol' bat cave?

For the eighth time,
it's batting cage.

Oh! There it is.
Eddie, pull over.

Oh, the country
store. It's so adorable.

You were right, Chels.

Dude, I could shop
there for hours.

Well, let's do it.

You know what? That is it!

I am outta here.

It's what I'm talking about.

Ha ha! Freedom!

Ha. Sweet freedom.

Huh?

Is there a problem, officer?

I'm telling you, I
didn't do anything.

Yeah, yeah. That's
what they all say.

You know what
this is right here?

It's a pocket. Huh?

Hey, somebody stole my badge.

Ha ha. I took it
off to Polish it.

Things have been a
little slow around here.

Then again, not since I
caught the pink bandit.

Pink bandit?

Heh heh. That's a funny name.

Ha ha. Who are they?

You! Me?

That's right.

There's been a series of
burglaries around these parts.

And the suspect's
getaway car is pink.

What? See, I wanted to
paint it blue with racing stripes.

But what had happened
was I had got outvoted.

Yeah, why don't you just
keep working on that excuse

while I take this call?

I'm watching you, pinky.

Hello.

Uh, actually, that's a fax.

I know the difference
between a phone and a fax.

Fax is where the
paper comes out.

Right?

Right. 10-4.

Uh-huh.

The pink bandit's been
identified as a woman.

See? I told you it wasn't me.

Uh-oh. Hey, don't get
your britches in a bunch.

I just made a little mistakey.

You're free to go.
Thank you. Yes!

You'll find her.

Thank you very much.

Your things are over here.

Cool.

Well, well, well.

What do we have here?

Seems like someone
is fond of a purple dress.

Well, actually, that
one is lavender.

And that one is periwinkle.

Not that I would know.

You know, because it ain't mine.

Uh-huh.

I suppose these burglary
tools aren't yours either.

Stop it. Ain't no
burglary tools up in there.

Just the rope,
flashlight, and a mask.

Man. All right.

How 'bout I just save you
the trouble on this one?

Can I make my
one phone call now?

Oh, Chels, how
cute is this place?

Hey. Hey. Let's take one
of these old-time photos.

Oh, yeah.

Hello. Hello. It's Eddie.

Hey, Eddie.

Oh, hey, Eddie. We
just got our picture taken.

Yeah, I'm about to
get mine taken, too.

Like y'all oughta come get me.

I'm in jail.

They think I'm the pink bandit.

What? When did all this happen?

When I got tired of waitin'
on y'all and drove off.

I can't believe you left us.

I can't believe you
didn't know I was gone.

You know what? You
really need to call your mom.

No! No. Do not call my mom, ok?

She said if I was
in any trouble,

she'd take the car away.

Then it's back to
the bus for all of us.

Ok, Eddie, stay calm.
We'll be right there.

All right.

Ooh. Ooh. Chels. Chels.

The dogs are
k*lling me. All right?

All right, you just stay here.

I'll go down and
explain everything,

and then we'll come get you.

Ok.

Uh, Rae? Yeah, I don't think
I explained everything right.

Chels, what is
going on over there?

I'm in jail, too, Rae.

The sheriff thinks I'm working
with Eddie, the pink bandit.

I am not the pink bandit.

Give me the phone.

Look, Rae, we need
a lawyer right away.

I don't have enough
money for a lawyer.

Well, figure
something out, girl.

Pink bandit?

Ok, I rushed right over.

Brah, I called you 2 hours ago.

Yeah. Look how
nice my nails look.

You know what?
I'm gonna nail you

if you don't give me
all my money back

for this stupid dog-attracting
Cologne you sold me.

Well, you do know the policy?

You got a receipt?

You bet I got a receipt.

Uhh! Read the back.

No refunds?!

Man!

Good thing you had the receipt.

Saved us another argument.

Look, Stanley, I
ain't playing with you.

Tell me how long
before this stuff wears off.

Oh, I'd say about 2 maybe 3...

Hours? Months.

What? Ok, that is it.

I am never buying another
thing from you ever again.

You know what? This will get ya.

I'm cutting off your cheese
sandwiches. Forget about it.

Ok. Ok. Calm down.

Since you're a valued customer,

I'm gonna give you my
state-of-the-art anti-dog advice

free of charge.

That's better. That's
a businessman.

I like that.

Bam!

A stick?

All right, you tell me. What am I
supposed to do with a stupid stick?

Throw it.

Say, "go fetch."

Then run out of the way.

You know what?

I got a better idea. No.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Yeah. How do you like that?

Now go take your medicine.

No! Wait.

Oh, it's waiting
for you outside.

Please.

Oh. Don't even come back here.

Aah! No! No! No!

That's right. I single-handedly
caught the pink bandit.

No. Turns out
that she is a he...

Who dresses like a she.

Yeah, there's a friend
involved, but she's playing dumb.

I am not playing, buddy.

Hold up, now.

Now, I say here, hold up.

Sorry, mama. I gotta
call you right back.

Yes, ma'am. I'll
be home for dinner.

Can I help you, sir?

Allow me to introduce myself.

I am grover t. Windpipe,
attorney-at-law.

What can I do for
you, Mr. Windpipe?

Obviously, there has been
some misunderstanding

between you and
my alleged clients.

He's good.

He's Raven.

Now, if you will release
these innocent perpetrators,

we will be on our way.

As long as my name is grover

to the "t," to the
"wind," to the "pipe."

Not so fast.

No one is going anywhere
without a preliminary hearing.

I object!

My hearing is just fine,
thank you very much.

Now, if you don't mind,

would you please release
these habeas corpuscles

and I will release my briefs,
and we will be on our way.

I bid you, sheriff, adieu.

Toodle-loo, hally-ho,
hally what-what-what-what?

You.

You tell that to the judge.
He'll be here any minute.

Yes, suh. Thank you very much.

Someone who
understands the ramifications

and the qualifications.

Rae, why didn't
you get a lawyer?

What? I only had $20 left.

I had to rent a costume.

You see, if you two
weren't out shopping all day,

you would have some
money left for a real lawyer.

Hey. Hey. Do you wanna get
out, or do you wanna stay in jail?

I can't stay in jail. I got a
Spanish test on Tuesday.

So calm down, all right? I've seen
so many of these lawyer shows.

I might not be getting
anywhere with the sheriff,

but wait till that
judge gets here.

It's all pipe-pipe.

Court is now in session.

Judge Jefferson presiding.

You the judge, too?

Oh, snap.

I... I mean, um, ahem.

I hereby request a snap
decision on this case.

Will the defendants
please step forward?

Uh, we kind of
locked in here, sir.

Oh. Uh, jiggle it
a little. It'll open.

What?

We could've walked
right through, man.

Wasted all my time
digging that tunnel.

Shh!

Bandit and accomplice,
please have a seat.

Now, your client have been
accused of being the pink bandit.

And your other client has been
accused of being his partner.

Do you have any evidence that's
subordinates these so-called...

Accusations?

Well, we have a pink
car, woman's clothes,

and the burglary tools.

Dang, you got all
that? I mean, uh,

I mean, uh, I mean... What?

Oh, no, sir!

No, sir! This, sir, is a sham...

Of a mockery...
Of a bamboozling.

This could very
well be your mama's.

My mama? Oh, no, you didn't.

How far did you get
with that tunnel again?

I was outside.

Enough of this.

Do you or do you not
have proof that your client

didn't put on this dress
and Rob innocent people?

Put on this dress.

Wait a minute.
There's only one way

to blow away the
cloud of injustice...

From my client's nasty head.

Client Edward Thomas,
stand here, please.

What?

Put on this dress.

Uh-uh.

You have to do it.

This is the only way to prove

that you are not in
fact the pink bandit.

Because...

If the dress does not
fit, you must acquit.

Let me reiterate that
for you one more time.

Whoo, whoo, whoo.

If the dress ain't the
right size, you must, sir,

what-what-what
must apologize. What.

If it's the wrong size,
you must apologize?

What were you thinking, Rae?

I was thinking it
wasn't gonna fit.

Yeah. But it looks like
it was made for him.

Turn around, Eddie.
Let me see from the back.

You can see everything
you wanna see.

What am I doing?

This is an outrage, I say.

This is illegal.

This is indivisible, and
this is reprehensible.

Drop the act. He was
never buying it anyway.

Not for a minute.
That's why I wear this.

Oh, snell, lost it again.

I'm sorry, guys. I
guess I made it worse.

This is all my fault, you know?

I should've never left you guys.

No, Eddie. We totally
took advantage of you

with the whole car thing.

Yeah. You made it so
easy with all the voting.

And, you know, you
never really had a chance.

But it was still wrong.

Well, if we're going to jail, at
least we're going together, y'all.

Wait a minute. I can't
stay in the slammer.

Think about it, you guys.
What if we never get out?

Seriously, I'll go nuts.

Nuts, I tell you.

Someone, let me out of here.

Let me out. Let me out of here.

Let me out of here!

You're free to go.

Oh, thank you very much.

It turns out they just
caught the real pink bandit.

They're bringing her in now.

She confessed to everything.

Hah. I told you I was innocent.

Now give me back my pants.

All right.

There's the suspect now.

You need to let me go. I don't
know what you think you're doing.

That's right. I did it.

What are you gonna do about it?

Who do you think you are, boy?

'Cause you one
scary-looking woman.

But you are working that dress.

I... let's go.

Ooh, you strong.

♪ I gotta get you back ♪

♪ I gotta see this through ♪

♪ I gotta get you back ♪

♪ if it's the last thing I do ♪

Aah, see? I told you guys
my vision would come true.

The 3 of us cruising
along in our very own...

Oh!

Why are we slowing down?

I'm not slowing
down. The car is.

Oh, we outta gas.

Out of gas? Eddie!

Don't Eddie me.
It's not my fault.

Uh, you gotta put gas in the
car. That's what makes it go.

Well, you're the one
that can see the future.

How come you couldn't
see us running out of gas?

Ooh, wait a minute. Wait! Wait!

Somebody is coming.
Maybe they can help us.

Help! Aah!

Was that?

Nah. Nah. Nah.