[Music]
[Music]
[Music]
[Music]
foreign
[Music]
for some reason I'm craving grapes
[Music]
excuse me are you made of window cleaner
because I can see my face in your pants
[Music]
if I say you pretty will you hold
against me
foreign
hello gorgeous I'm yoshika I'm from
Budapest you are so stunning and exotic
where are you from Empire Caribbean Part
Puerto Rican part time Moroccan do you
have any Hungarian in you not really
sorry would you like to have one in you
tonight
blood is amazing there is food from
every country in the world yeah but not
best food in the world you're right no
Russian food
Hungarian food best food in the world
Hungarian food not even best food in
Hungary only good food you have is
washed and you're still there from
Russia good buddy have you noticed there
is no postcard
it's poor people do nothing
it is up to us to let them know yeah hey
everybody do you know you're missing
Porsche and
to stop that day
you Mr Smith the hot sweaty man you look
very thirsty how about the refreshing
cup of hot boss yeah oh it's good
we have not sold one cup all day but I
give up is not working
no no not give up I have uncle in
Budapest yeah very successful
businessman he always say vocation
location location
he started but he's very successful now
we find a better location
yeah a place where everybody go
perfect the easyest place on the beach
the customer get ready
we must face facts we have failed we
could not even sell one small spot of
[ __ ]
maybe that is problem we think too small
yeah we get Pickle pot
no no we are in America now we must
think big from start did Apple computer
start in garage did McDonald's start
with just one store did America start
with one ship from England
ah we open Porsche garage
oh my God
[Music]
Russian Hungarian restaurant
Hungarian Russian restaurant huh exactly
Russian Hungary this idea cannot fail I
must say that I am not familiar with
these two Cuisines I have however been
intimate with ladies from both countries
dude if you're not going to invest get
out of the way I do have two or three
gold teeth that I may be willing to part
with this one is my college fund this
one I'm keeping for a rainy day
here if you need someone to cook I can
work in the kitchen but I don't do
dishes
Papa I'm so proud of you meaning I could
design the menu
you'll know the rules no hanging out
here when there's no lifeguard oh hello
blondes love what are you doing hanging
around with these foreigners actually
miss Knight we are going to open
restaurant hey perhaps you would like to
invest put my money in a business run by
immigrants fair chance even if you could
get a loan and a permit and find a place
to open it 99 of businesses fail in the
first year but not restaurants
and that's why it's just about
impossible for immigrants to get a big
clone I mean you not talk to them they
competition now they come to spy
whatever she say it's like all instead
was immigrants can't get loans that's
not true American citizen can sign for
U.S front man
thank you for tip
you will not drive me out of business I
will compete
I will arrange for loan
money and purchase food agreed and then
people meet back at apartment and post
to our new successful business yeah
God
[Music]
oh might I say it's a privilege to be
working with such a fine looking loan
officer not just to be clear officer is
a bank title and not associated with the
police am I correct
and also to be clear I am not a legal
alien
[Music]
oh dear paperwork and it appears I have
arrived here with my seeing glasses not
my literacy glasses
sale last seven days
neat story hello hi how is everything
I'm looking for good price on 200 pounds
of high quality meat that you know
tastes good is good good meat do you
want you got your part you got your
chicken your lamb not beef I need beef
oh you're talking to Kettle like a Meats
that'll cost you
ah yeah I was thinking about this
well I don't know I might be able to do
this okay that is your original price
come on all right I'll tell you what I'm
gonna do I like the color your jib let
me go check with my boss
I'm so sorry but he won't budge that's
his best price then I take it
nah I know the bank's interest rate is
eight percent I would just like to say
my interest rate and you is 100
what you turned down American citizen
it's cause I don't have a permanent
address ain't it look I told you
sometimes I'm with Gladys and sometimes
I'm with Mavis but it's still the same
building oh come on baby give a brother
a chance
I know what this is about it's cause I'm
black
[Music]
I design the menu oh it's beautiful
sweetheart thank you so much and you
also mean but but I knew it
this original menu designer yet I I have
bad news long was the Night by bank that
should be no restaurant
we have 200 pounds of meat
you've spent all investors money on meat
yeah yeah I got good price but we have
no place to sell it we did not get loan
well maybe we can use meat to bribe bank
for long it's like old Hungarian saying
it take me to make meat short American
Banks nothing except the meat we have to
return it
[Music]
you buy meat in watch store it was meat
store an hour ago I am sure
according to sign it has been watched
for a long time
yeah hi I wish to return meat this is a
watch store now I can't take anything
back unless it tells time but the sign
said you would be meat store for seven
more days yeah we put that up a week ago
please when I bought the meat we did not
know we would not need it yeah all right
do you have a receipt yes is the meat
still in its original condition yes yes
does the meat tell time yeah no then I
can't take it back
[Music]
I heard no that's right you come to Back
forgiveness no we thought maybe you
would like to buy some meat yeah 200
pounds real cheap what can you meet you
got your pork you got your chicken your
lamb beef beef
oh Lincoln Town Car of meat
I give you one dollar but we paid 500 I
tried to support family here you know
what it costs to send for ungrateful
daughters to college
okay one dollar
that's all you see we sound long we have
no place to set up restaurant and with
that restaurant we have no place to cook
and sell meat that's it no more business
speculations for me I'm putting my money
in a safe place
my investment gone that money was going
towards a fallout shelter I might as
well have just throw my money into a big
hole in the ground well we used all our
savings to buy this meat Smite as well
cook it up and enjoy it now that you
mention it I can go for a 35 pound
burger right around now
I'll fire up the barbecue I'll set up
some tables
[Music]
[Music]
wait a minute
come on what this remind you of oh good
idea we will have weddings you call me
Brainiac a restaurant we will open the
restaurant here in Courtyard the Vista
Del Maria
to open the restaurant in apartment
complex it will only be for one night
just so we can pay for this meat and
make our money back dude that's a good
idea like a big one night only party
let's do it
[Music]
what is this a crowd scene from Moscow
under Hudson I thought I told you no
loitering we are not lawyering we are
walking very slowly back to our
Apartments well hurry it up
[Music]
um
my offer of free massage is still good
you know what they say about older women
we're like a fine wine
60 years ago you may have been full body
but you're bitter and dry now
I go
there goes there
I open up a restaurant here even if
we're sorry for one night so I haven't
seen victim if only we had a way to keep
her in her apartment and get really
drunk so she falls asleep for the night
yeah but how
[Music]
long this night you are looking
thanks for the blues
[Music]
as Russian I do not like to rush it
perhaps you fix drink while I fix Shades
to make privacy
this box is in the Hang house
foreign
[Music]
advertise
[Music]
much quicker than putting restaurants
[Music]
[Music]
I love themed restaurants the fake
poverty is so authentic I'm not sure if
the theme is poverty or petting zoo
hello hi welcome to the post Bistro we'd
like your finest table
[Music]
please take lovely couple to Table Three
three
did you remember
listen Jenny cancel all my freaking
reservations tonight I've just
discovered a hip new place
[Music]
[Music]
oh all right let's go
we must drink to idea of going
[Music]
[Music]
okay today's special Hungarian goulash
for 7.95 or all meat you can eat for
500. how's the beef stroganoff oh
traditional Russian recipe it's
absolutely delicious and terrific and
super yummy also it's Ultra healthy this
dish is a miracle but I recommend the
goulash we'll have the goulash good
choice do you have a smoking section
slow down there are too many orders I'm
in other words
[Music]
oh stupid restaurant is success I work
hard to raise my family and make good
life for you and our daughters and now
after all my hard work we are crushed by
competition oh do not give up okay we
will have more daughters and start again
no I will not roll over I came to
America to be an American and in America
We Fight Fire With Fire
[Music]
hey come we will learn to compression
[Music]
how you two drinks so much
I was vodka princess 1936.
my prize was a lifetime supply of vodka
don't you ever met so sober after all
you and your sisters
it's time I sent you into orbit my
little rusky cosmonaut
[Music]
that's right back it's bad idea
oh that's a lot of money Holmes yeah we
are now even for remainder of night
everything is profit ah you hear that
we're gonna be rich
nothing
[Music]
quick
Donuts
[Music]
don't you just love Russian theater
oh
[Music]
midnight we have opened up a restaurant
but it's only for rest of tonight we at
ends now everybody get out of here all
of you
you heard me everybody out Miss Knight
please people are just about to make big
money what was that big money you say
Yeah in that case I want in
okay we give you maybe about 10 90. ah
take a walk sister
fine then I'm calling immigration 90
sounds fair
ninety percent it is but we have one
condition will you please put roll back
on
please
nice place who's the owner I owe 90
[Music]
health inspector that's right and you're
operating a restaurant without the
proper permits that's a violation of
health code number
like you know the health code numbers
just trust me it's one of them but we're
about to make lots of money
maybe we could work something
out
oh that's tour violations
[Music]
I shouldn't see that ending coming
Eastern Europeans are known for their
circuses more than their theater
thank you
[Music]
how did we do
not so good we break even break even
this is great news are you still drunk
or something how is this great news was
bad idea buying meat bad idea getting me
snipe drunk terrible idea
sex with over a thousand women
oh
yes
bad ideas we still like even all we need
is good idea and we cannot fail
you know you make good point my friend
hey I think I have one do not say no
until you're here okay two words we buy
a bunch of watches yet don't say no to
you here we take the watches we bring
them to a store a store
[Music]
thank you
foreign
[Music]
[Music]
01x06 - Borscht Bistro
Watch/Buy Amazon
Jóska, a Hungarian immigrant in Los Angeles, shares an apartment with Vladislav, a Russian immigrant.
Originally a TV series but never aired, in 2008 it was combined and turned into a movie.
Jóska, a Hungarian immigrant in Los Angeles, shares an apartment with Vladislav, a Russian immigrant.
Originally a TV series but never aired, in 2008 it was combined and turned into a movie.