03x07 - Operation P.I.N.K.-E.Y.E./Operation K.A.S.T.L.E.

[bunniefuu]

It's a crazy world.

I thought I'd seen it all... All

The gross, yucky stuff that

People do.

That's my job.

I'm a private eye.

I see things.

But I was blind... Blind to the

Truth.

And I thought you were so

Sweet.

This morning seemed like a long

Time ago.

It started out like any other.

I was in my office, enjoying a

Delicious slice of

Nurse claiborne's apple

Crumble, when she came in.

Her voice was like a thousand

Violins...

Hoagie gilligan!!

Being played by a monkey.

Her name was fanny, but if you

Were smart, you'd call her

Numbah 86.

You are supposed to be in

Math class.

Why are you in the janitor's

Closet?

Let's just call it "my

Office," and detectives are

Always doing the math in their

Heads.

Ugh!

You are not a detective.

Are too!

Are not!

Are too!

Are not!

Are... Too.

Are... Not!

Whatever you say, but you

Came in here for a reason.

A lot of kids out in the

Hallways haven't made it back to

- Their classrooms, if you catch - my drift.

- Girl like you might need my - help.

What I need is paper towels

For the girls' bathroom!

Sure you do, toots.

Toots!?

Uh, i-i mean ma'am...

Uh, sir... Aah!

[ Punches connecting ]

[ Shouting indistinctly ]

Toots...

[ Huffs ] I'd like to see him

Call me that again.

Funny girl, that fanny.

She treated me like garbage, but

She didn't fool me.

She came in here for a reason.

Was it a cry for help?

He-e-e-e-e-lp!

Maybe not, but that was.

[ Indistinct talking ]

All right, all right.

Everybody get back to your

Classes... Nothing to see here.

The big-sh*t hall monitor is

Joe balooka.

He's been on the force as long

As anyone can remember.

- Joe's a bad cop and a worse - friend.

I should know.

I was his partner before I

Signed up with the kids next

Door.

What do you know, joe?

Hoagie gilligan?

I thought I told all civilians

To go back to class.

That means you.

Just thought I'd keep you

Company.

You know, for old time's sake.

[ Chomping ] hmm.

- Suit yourself, but it ain't - pretty.

A couple of kids heard the

Scream and alerted the office.

This is what we found.

Pinkeye.

Yep.

Somebody's been loading their

Water balloons with the stuff.

Poor numbah 86.

You know the victim?

She was in my office five

Minutes ago.

Was she, now?

Listen, joe, don't try

Pinning this on me.

Gangway!

Gangway!

Yow!

Oh, my.

Will you just look at that?

Poor dear's case is spreading.

Now, don't you worry,

Little missy, nurse claiborne

Knows just what to do with you.

Hiya, miss claiborne... Good

Batch of crumble this week.

Well, hey there, hoagie.

- I didn't know you were back on - the force.

Just doing some private eye

Work.

Well, good for you, but you

Better be careful now.

You don't want your p.i. To turn

Into pinkeye.

[ Giggles ]

[ Giggles ] good one, miss c.

Well, you boys have a good

Day.

I've got to see to fanny here.

This must be the thirteenth case

This week.

A baker's dozen of victims,

Eh?

Department's slipping, joe.

You stow it, gilligan.

- I've already rescinded all hall - passes.

No one's allowed in the hall

Except me.

Is that so, joe?

I don't like your tone,

Gilligan.

You were the last person to see

The victim, which makes you the

Prime suspect.

Make me angry, and I'll toss you

Into detention so hard, you're

Goggles will spin.

[ Chomps ]

[ Giggles ]

See you around, joe.

I rattled joe's cage, now I had

To go back and do the math.

Who was water-ballooning kids

With pinkeye?

How'd they get their mitts on

Pinkeye mucus?

That stuff's not easy to come

By.

What was the connection between

The victims and why... Why was I

Asking these questions?

It was none of my business.

Huh!?

My office!

My crumbles!

Now it was my business.

There is a connection between

The victims.

They'd all been in the halls

Without a pass.

But the perps always eluded joe.

Now, joe's a jerk, but he's not

That bad of a cop.

That's when it hit me.

Ugh!

That was like having

Muffy jenkins as a lab

Partner...

Too close.

[ Panting ]

[ Chuckles ]

[ Panting continues ]

Lost him.

What do you know, joe?

Uh, hoagie [ chuckles ]...

I-i-i was just, uh...

I'm looking for the guy that

sh*t at you.

You've been eating too many

Crumbles, joe.

Your aim is slipping.

You gotta understand,

Hoagie...

Oh, I understand, all right.

I was nosing around, and you

Thought you'd give me the eye.

You're more crooked than a front

Tooth without braces.

I had no choice.

This is bigger than you know.

It's bigger than me.

It's... Well, it's not as big as

You, but it's big.

Joe, joe, joe...

You're an embarrassment to your

Hall-monitor uniform.

Now, spill it!

Okay, okay, I'll sing.

It's... Aah!

[ Gasps ]

Freeze!

Joe, speak to me.

Blech!

Hold on, joe.

I'll get you to the nurse's

Office.

Easy, joe, easy.

Don't worry, pal.

I won't leave a friend in the

Lurch.

Yeah, call me a softie, but I

Guess joe and me would always be

Friends.

Nurse claiborne!

We got one heck of a case here!

Oh, me-oh-mi!

Poor joey.

Looks like we got an epidemic on

Our hands.

Hoagie, dear, why don't you help

Yourself to a crumble while I

Deal with joey?

Don't mind if I do.

So, what's the diagnosis, doc?

Can you do anything for him?

Oh, now, I wouldn't worry.

I know exactly what to do with

Him.

Hey... Where's fanny, and

Where are the other pinkeye

Cases?

Oh, um... Well...

Th-th-they're in the other room.

But you really don't want to see

Them, dearie.

You might get infec..tucated.

Yeah, well, I wouldn't worry

About me.

Oh, um...

Hoagie!

Uh...

Why don't you just take all

Those crumbles over there and

Just go?

What do you say, huh?

Why, sure, nurse claiborne,

After I see your patients.

No!

Huh?

You... You're using eye crust...

As a topping for my

World-famous crumble surprise!

So that means I've been

Eating...

Ewwww!!

Blech!

Ohh!

Blegh!

Ah!

Ew, ew, ew!

[ Shudders ]

Blegh!

That is seriously gross, lady!

Maybe, but it's also

Brilliant!

I have made millions in bake

Sales, and I don't intend to

Stop now, which brings up the

Question of how to dispose of

You.

Can we just go back to how

Totally disgusting this is?!

I mean, I'm lucky I didn't just

Have lunch!

Eww!

Shut up!

Just take your water-balloon

p*stol out of your holster...

Yieee!

Huh?

[ Moans ]

Way to go, joe!

You!

I'll finish you once and for

All!

Aah!

It's over, lady.

- I just called the kids next - door.

They'll be here any second to

Clean up your whole supergross

Operation.

You...

You'll never take me!

[ Gasps ]

You'll never take...

No!

Me!

[ Moans ]

Whoa.

[ Cackles ] you haven't seen

The last of me, you brat!

Whoo-hoo!

[ Laughs ]

So that was that.

Nurse claiborne escaped.

The kids next door released the

Victims and cured them of their

Pinkeye.

Joe had been getting his crumble

Free in exchange for supplying

The nurse with a steady stream

Of infected kids.

Joe claimed he didn't know what

They were being used for, and I

Believe him.

Joe's not that smart.

Kids next door global command

Assigned numbahs 41 and 43 to

Track down nurse claiborne.

They're pretty good...

They'll need to be to catch her.

That left just one question...

What to do with these crumbles.

Like is said, it's a crazy

World.

So, if the crumble topping

Was eye crust, what was the

Filling?

Ah-choo!

Kids next door

R.o.l.l.a.s.k.a.t.e....

Rolling object launches lard and

Slimy ketchup around, totally

Excessively.

Both: huh?

Ugh!

[ Indistinct talking ]

[ Muttering indistinctly ]

Hi-ya!

The kids next door emergency

as*ault squad has arrived.

What is the nature of your

Emergency?

Thank goodness you're here.

The ride's about to start.

All: ride?

Both: the best ride in

Rainbow monkey happy sugar land!

Hey!

You kids have to buy tickets if

You wanna enter the amusement...

Park.

Ow!

You used the kids next door

Extra priority super alert to

Get us to go on a stupid ride

With you and your sister?

It's not a stupid ride!

It's the rainbow monkey

Sugarcoated kastle of love...

Ride.

And it costs two tickets to

R...

Ow!

The kids next door super

Alert is for emergencies only,

Not when you want to go on a

Kiddie ride, so get out of that

Stupid boat, and let's get back

To the treehouse, numbah 3.

No!

I wanna go on the sugarcoated

Castle of love with my sister!

And if you don't wanna go, then

Who needs you?

Hmm!

- Whatever, just don't call us - again.

Now, which way is the exit in

This blasted place?

Seriously, guys, I'm really

Gonna need t...

Ow!

Ow, I bit my cheek.

Both: wha...

Whoa!

Ooh!

Ah!

Romeo, romeo, where art

Thou love and kisses,

Rainbow-monkey romeo?

Both: yay!

What light through yonder

Window breaks.

Why, if it isn't pretty princess

Rainbow-monkey juliet.

Both: aw.

But I canst not marry thee,

For thine father is the

Count do-not-very-nice, who

Hates all pretty princess

Rainbow monkeys.

Both: waaaaaa!

But the count is not my

Father.

He is my third uncle's third

Cousin and thrice removed.

Both: then that means...

♪ Rainbow monkeys

♪ Rainbow monkeys

♪ There's wedding bells now, and

That's so lovely ♪

- ♪ Filled with love the rest of - their lives ♪

♪ They'll be monkey man and

Rainbow wife ♪

♪ Oh, red and yellow

♪ And green and blue

♪ Rainbow monkeys

♪ Rainbow monkeys

♪ Say "I do"

It's like a dream dipped in

Sparkles come true.

[ Sighs ] it's more beautiful

Than love and rainbows and...

Aah!

Well, ducks are cute, but I

Don't...

Aah!

[ Gasps ]

We meet again, fair princess.

King sandy has been searching

Everywhere for you, and he

Commands that ye and he be

Married.

You're getting married?

No!

But that knight said...

It's a long story, okay?

Aah!

Both: whoa!

After the princess!

After the princess!

After the princess!

I can't believe you're

Getting married to a real king!

Sandy's not a real king.

He's just a crazy kid who's

Always trying to marry me.

How romantic!

I've got to call the others

For help.

Look... We've passed

Caring-and-sharing mountain

Three times now.

This is not the way to the exit!

Well, when we went your way,

We ended up walking through the

Pretty-pile-of-puppies'-poo-poo

Pagoda.

- [ Beeping ] - huh?

It's the kids next door super

Alert.

Guys, you gotta get over here

Quick!

Yeah, there's gonna be a

Wedding in the castle of love!

Numbah 3, I told you that

Super alert is for emergencies

Only!

But...

End transmission, numbah 3.

Numbah 1?

Oh, no!

Hi, romantic guy!

Mushi, you've got to find the

Others and tell them I need

Help!

Good idea... A wedding

Doesn't plan itself, you know.

Just get them!

Whoo!

Pbht!

Now, don't you lovebirds run off

And elope!

[ Giggles ]

Sheesh... What an airhead!

Whoa!

Aaaaaaaaahh!

[ Groaning ]

Aah!

Teen-dream-fashion...

Rainbow monkey!?

[ Gasps ]

Sprinkle-kisses-bacon-bonanza

Rainbow monkey!?

Aah!

Possum-chasing-mauling-fun

Rainbow monkey!?

[ Sobbing loudly ]

How can anyone be so cruel?

Huh?

Ah, princess, I hope your

Accommodations are to your

Liking.

Why, sandy?!

Why are you...

Torturing these innocent rainbow

Monkeys?

Isn't it obvious?

I need to insure that my

Most perfect wedding to the most

Beautiful princess in the entire

Kingdom goes uninterrupted this

Time.

Aw, that's so sweet.

But I'm not marrying you,

Mr. "I'm pretending to be a king

But I'm really a big stupid

Head"!

I told you the king does not

Pretend!

And you will marry me or...

You'll just have to "pretend"

These rainbow monkeys never got

Dipped in scalding-hot nacho

Cheese!

[ Gasps ] you wouldn't!

I would!

You can't.

I can.

[ Sniffles and sobs ]

You...

You...

Oh...

You win.

Just promise me you'll let them

Go.

Anything for my ravishing

Fiancée.

Prepare the princess for the

Royal wedding!

All: prepare the princess!

[ Growl ]

But kuki said you ha-a-ve to

Co-o-o-o-me!

Or what... We'll miss being

Hugged to death in miss peachy's

Panda parlor?

[ Laughs ]

That's a good one.

Well, if you're not gonna

Come see kuki get married to

King sandy, then I'll just go

All by myself!

Whatever!

All: king sandy!?

All right, we're like,

Totally gathered here today to

Join this little dude and this

Princess dudette in total,

Permanent marriedness.

If there's anyone who does not

Think that this isn't, like, the

Raddest thing ever, let them

Speak now or...

[ Mushi crying ]

What now!?

She can't marry you because

Your father is the

Count do-not-very-nice, who

Hates all pretty princess

Rainbow monkeys...

Just like in the pretend story.

The king does not pretend!!

What to you mean you're not

Pretending?

You can't really marry her.

She's, like, 10 years old!

That's it, that's it, that's

It!

Throw this wedding crasher in

The dungeon forever!

[ All growl ]

Eek!

Kuki, come on!

Whaa!

Aah!

Kuki... [ Giggles ] that was

Even better than the pretend

Story!

[ Growls ]

Okay, you fiancée-napper, you

Are...

[ Breathes heavily ]

Beau-ti-ful!

Really?

The most beautiful princess

In the kingdom!

Well, I am a lot cuter than

My sister.

Hey!

What's that supposed to...

Ah, pipe down, granny.

Uhh!

Now, you listen to me, bub.

I'm not... Whoa!

- [ Screaming ] - ugh!

Yaa!

Step away from the girl.

That was so romantic!

My lady...

- [ Growls ] - whoa!

Ugh!

[ Grumbling ]

Hey... Didn't you hear me?

I said...

Sandy, it's lunchtime!

Can I bring my new pretty

Girlfriend?

Uhh!

Okay, but don't forget your

Cousins.

All: all right! Yeah!

[ Indistinct talking ]

Man, that sandy's got weird

Taste in girls.

[ Grunts ]

Uh-oh.

Ow!

Ow!

What did you hit me for?

Nothin'.



♪ Kids next door

♪ Kids next door

[ Electric guitar solo ]

♪ Kids next door

♪ Kids next door

♪ Kids next door

[ Electric guitar solo ]

♪ Kids next door

♪ Kids next door