03x10 - Dirks Family

[bunniefuu]

[screaming]

NARRATOR: They're every
parent's worst nightmare.

Don't bite.

You're gonna be sorry.

[screaming]

NARRATOR: Kids completely
out of control--

WOMAN: Give me the Kn*fe.

I want to k*ll you!

NARRATOR: --and taking
over the household.

[grunt]

Don't do that.

NARRATOR: These families have
reached the end of the rope.

How was I supposed to
know it's going to have

three kids in two years?
[screaming]

NARRATOR: They're in
desperate need of help.

Shut up, everyone!

NARRATOR: They only have
one alternative left.

[scream]

NARRATOR: It's time
to contact Nanny 911.

[ringing]

Hello, this is Nanny 911.

NARRATOR: We've gathered a
team of world-class nannies

from all over the globe.

Each week from Nanny
Central, they will watch

a video of a family in crisis--

Stop it.

[grunting]

NARRATOR: --and decide which
nanny is best suited to help.

They will then have one week to
take our families from living

hell to a family bliss.

Give me my life back.

It's mine!

NARRATOR: Can these
families be saved.

I hate Daddy and Mommy!

It's an emotional
roller coaster.

Unless you get
this right, it's

all going to fall to pieces.

If you think you can do a
better job, get on with it.

NARRATOR: Parents of
America, help is on the way.

[ding dong]

Nanny's here.

The nanny's here!

NARRATOR: Tonight, when
it comes to parenting,

Paul and Amber Dirks are spent.

You're not listening.

I think they
just black us out.

NARRATOR: Songbird mom
sounds like a broken record--

Amari, Amari, Amari, Amari.

NARRATOR: --while
dad's a pushover

for his babes in toyland.

These children have
way too many toys.

It's like Chuck E. Cheese.

NARRATOR: This bad boy and
material girl are driving

their family into the red.

TIMER: Time's up.

NARRATOR: When Nanny Stella
turns into repo man--

Everything's gone.

NARRATOR: --will these
kids pay attention?

Absolutely everything.

NARRATOR: It's money can't buy
me love tonight on "Nanny 911."

[screaming]

Hey!

My name is Paul Dirks.

I'm a software engineer.

I can bench 420.

My wife's a professional singer.

hoo hoo hoo hoo.

is Amber Dirks.

I'm a mom first
and a singer, yeah.

from sunny, sunny,

sunny, sunny, hot Arizona.

Our children are unruly.

I'm not playing now.

I mean, you name
it, it is pure chaos.

There's a lot of mass confusion.

Once they start
going, they're going.

Amari is my 3 and 1/2 year
old unpredictable child.

Amari.

Sometimes he hits.

Sometimes he'll bite.

Amari.

Amari will kick you.

He will bite you.

He will slap you.

Amari has been kicked
out of preschool.

Hey!

He bit a kid in the crotch.

I doubt that he was aiming
for that specific area.

It's just how it turned out.

Hey Amari, please
don't do that.

Please don't do that.

I said not to do that.

[crying]

AMBER DIRKS: Anissa,
our two-year-old,

is at that terrible twos stage.

And let me tell you, the
girlfriend has got some issues,

OK?

I'm seeing a side of her that
I have never seen before.

Terrible twos, boy.

She is just
extremely combative.

My daughter is
having the most issues

as far as hitting and biting.

Hey, what are
you trying to do?

Why are you biting, girl?

She just gets into everything.

Nissa, Nissa,
stay out of there.

Omi is my wife's mother.

She comes over every weekend and
a lot of times during the week.

I'm going to get you.

That is my mother.

That's my girl.

And she loves her
grandkids to death.

Give me a kiss and a hug.

Materialistically, my
children are extremely spoiled.

It's like they don't
hear anything you say.

We even had their ears checked
because we thought maybe

they were hard of hearing.

AMBER DIRKS: You're
not listening.

I think they
just block us out.

PAUL DIRKS: Nissa, don't hit.

Nissa, stay on the rug.

Nissa--

We're like prisoners
in our own home.

We really don't go to the
stores that much with our kids

because we always have problems.

AMBER DIRKS: Anissa!

It's not like way back
in the day when you get

your butt whooped in public.

You put a hand on the
child, you're going to have

the police called on you.

You're in time out.

PAUL DIRKS: We've
tried time outs.

Anissa--

No!

We've tried spankings.

Nothing seemed to work.
- Hey.

No!

They're yelling, no, no, no.

No!

They're calling you names.

You're dumb.

My wife stressed out.

At times, it seems like
she's kind of emotional.

We get it.

It's pure hell.

Daddy!

Daddy!

What we're currently
doing isn't working.

I just want a happy home.

You just don't want to admit
that something's not right.

Oh.

It really, really hurts us.

[screaming ]

You're a good person, baby.

[cry]

[screaming]

[screaming]

Well, ladies,
what do you think?

Mom's a terrific
singer, but her parenting

skills have hit a sour note.

Wow, that behavior is
extremely disrespectful.

Not to mention
dangerous, these kids

need a good lesson in manners.

It's time to clamp down
on all that biting.

It's appalling.

We certainly cannot allow
that behavior to continue.

Stella, I'm sending
you to Arizona to put

the Dirks' house in order.

I see.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): It
appears to me that the Dirks

family is singing the blues.

Wah.

NANNY STELLA

and dad Paul have no control
over their two small children.

Get up, Amari.
No.

[cry]

Nissa, that's not nice, hey.

NANNY STELLA

can help this out-of-tune family
learn how to live in harmony.


[ding-dong]

All right, I'm coming.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
I'm Nanny Stella from Burnley

in the North of England and I've
been a nanny for over 17 years.

Hey.

[crying]

AMBER DIRKS: Uh-oh.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
I've been called to the Grand

Canyon state to keep
the Dirks family

from going over the edge.

[crying]

AMBER DIRKS: You stay there.

[crying]

There's a lot of hitting and
screaming in the Dirks house.

It's time to change their tune.

[ding-dong]

Oh, sh**t, I think
that's the nanny.

Hi.

Hi, Stella.

Oh my god, I'm so
glad that you're here.

It seemed like a troop
walking into the house.

Oh, welcome to our home.

Thank you.

Her walk and her stand
holds a powerful punch.

Look at who we have
here, Miss Stella.

Hey.

NANNY STELLA: Hi, guys.
- Come on, let's go say hi.

NANNY STELLA: How are you?
Hello.

How are you doing, Paul Dirks?
NANNY STELLA: Nice to meet you.

PAUL DIRKS: When she first
came around the corner,

you're thinking, oh, here's
the help that we need.

But you're also on the back
of your mind thinking, uh-oh,

now I got to watch
what I'm doing.

You look shell shocked.

Yeah.

Today is the day that I get
to know you guys a little bit

better and basically
just following you

around with a notebook and pen.

So can I write your
name in my book?

Yeah.

OK, Amari.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
As my observation begins,

mom and dad gather the
children for breakfast.

I'm not hungry.

I hadn't even been
in the house an hour

and I could see Amari
starting to act up.

Amari, could
you please get up?

You're not listening.

PAUL DIRKS: Amari
can be very stubborn.

AMBER DIRKS: Amari,
would you please eat?

PAUL DIRKS: A lot
of times, he'll

just act like he ignores you.

AMBER DIRKS: Sit
correctly, Amari.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
Two-year-old Anissa has

no problem eating on her own.

But Amari, who's three,
won't take a bite.

Come on, Amari, sit correctly.

I like apple.

I spend a lot of my
day repeating Amari's

name 100,000 million times.

Ah.

Amari, you need to
eat your lunch, honey.

Well, you're not
eating yours, Amari.

A little more, Amari.

If I was given a dollar for
every time I heard "Amari--"

Amari.

--I'd be rich.

AMBER DIRKS: I think
Amari is finished.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
And no sooner do

they finish breakfast than
Anissa is asking for a bottle--

I want ba-ba.

NANNY STELLA

gladly uses to quiet her down.

Here, sweetie.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
This is definitely something

I need to keep an eye on.

Next, it's playtime, but there's
nothing playful about it.

[screaming]

AMBER DIRKS: Not
allowed, please.

Let's go outside.

Come on.

The kids like to
roughhouse and stuff.

I don't think it's a big deal.

Get up, Amari.

NANNY STELLA

things spin out
of control inside,

mom just sends the kids outside.

Watch where you're going.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
These children

have way too many toys.

They have motorized Escalades.

Back over here, Amari.

Hey!

I don't think
there's any such thing

as too many toys for a kid.

If I'm out shopping
or at the store

and I see something that I
think the kids will like,

you know, I get it for them.

Yeah, me.

Whose turn is it?

They have a playroom
that has a train in it

that they can ride around on.

[train whistle]

Paul and I have
issues about the toys.

You gotta shake
it hard, Nissa.

Materialistically, my
children are extremely spoiled.

PAUL DIRKS: You going
to dance, Nissa?

In the backyard, they have
a play gym and a bouncy thing

that you actually inflate.

It's like Chuck E. Cheese.

Ah!

Ga!

Ga!

Even though these children
have all the toys they could

want, they seem very troubled.

Nissa, don't bite.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
It seems to mom and dad

being a good parent means
giving these kids toys

rather than disciplining them.

Later in the day, dad
goes off to work, leaving

mom alone with the kids.

Work was kind of
my little getaway.

[screaming]

Go over there.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): And
no sooner is dad out the door

then mom is calling for backup.

Come here.

NANNY STELLA

I got something for you.

I'm very glad my mother is
available to watch our children

because I was through.

I'm leaving.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): It's
almost as if mom wants to avoid

parenting her own children.

Our plan was the
wife would stay

home, take care of the kids, but
now she's out during the day.

I got this is for Oma.

NANNY STELLA: But when it comes
to parenting and discipline,

grandma is no better
than mom and dad.

[yelling]

NANNY STELLA

lets the kids run
all over the house,

yelling at the top
of their lungs.

[screaming]

And that I just
did not get at all.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
After hours away from the kids,

mom finally returns home.

Warm out there, huh?

Mm-hm.

You want a what, honey?

NANNY STELLA

wants another bottle of milk.

Anissa is very demanding
about her bottle.

See, now you're playing nice.

Good job.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): It
looks like mom is using bottles

to keep Anissa under control.

You guys are
playing really nice.

Anissa-- Anissa--

AMBER DIRKS: Anissa is just
becoming extremely combative.

Nissa, no hitting.

NANNY STELLA: There was a lot
of really inappropriate behavior

and hitting from the children.

Anissa.

But from the parents,
there was definitely

no discipline and consequences.

Uh.

Hey!

What did I tell you, Amari?

If you can't play nice,
we're putting them away.

When Amari is the one that's
causing chaos, forget it,

it's pure hell.

Are you going to play nice or
are we going to put them away?

No.

OK, let's put them away.

I don't have to--

No, no!

You need to listen to me.

No!

I'm going to count
to three and then

we're going to go to your room.


NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): Mom
tries to get Amari to behave

with the thr*at of a timeout.

It wasn't working.

AMBER DIRKS: You get to
stay in here for a minute.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
And to my surprise,

mom's idea of a timeout means
sticking him in his room

and just locking the door.

That's what I had to do.

Otherwise, nothing
would get done.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
There is a real disconnect

between Amber and her kids.

By locking them in their room,
she is avoiding the hard part

of her parenting duties--

discipline.

Later in the day, dad returns
home and goes straight

to the office, while mom takes
the opportunity to disappear

into the bedroom to rehearse.

Just being with them,
you know, can be difficult.

Singing is a part of
my life that I love.


NANNY STELLA

dad is trying to work, but the
kids want to play with him.

Scissors.

No, Amari.

Daddy's working right now, OK?

Anytime I'm at home
when the kids are there,

they'll come up to wherever I am
and want me to play with them.

Nissa, no, no, no, no, no.

It can get irritating
after a while.

Color and make me happy.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
These kids need attention,

but their parents are
avoiding this by being

off in their own worlds.

I want to nip that in
the bud very quickly.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
When mom and dad finally

focus on the family
again, they just

put the kids in their bedrooms.

It is bedtime for you.

No.

Bedtime is pure havoc.

It's so out of control.

Anissa.

PAUL DIRKS: Amari!

Amari!

It just ends up
being a disaster.

[crying]

The behavior spiraled
out of control.

[screaming]

I just wanted to give him
a good swat on the behind.

No!

No!

No!

It was chaos.

Mama.

Stay in there.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
And in the end,

they use the same quick fix,
locking the bedroom doors.

[yell]

AMBER DIRKS: You know what?

I'm closing the door.

And that's what I had to do.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
These parents

are trying to lock
their problems

with their willful
children away.

But sooner or later, they
will have to face the music.

I've seen enough.

It's time to sit these parents
down for a serious talk.

I hope they're ready for
what I have to tell them.

Can we have a chat?

I'm like, oh my god, we
are going to get so reamed.

I've come to deliver the news.

One thing that I'm
going to say to you

is that you haven't
been able to be

effective in your role
of disciplining them

because you've rewarded
them with toys.

Ah!

They have way too many toys.

She hasn't even seen what I
have in the closets for them.

There is no listening from
your children, all right?

And there is no discipline.

It's just chaos.

And some of it is hurtful chaos.

[laughter]

[grunt]

AMBER DIRKS: Hey!

Excuse me?

That freaked me out.

And another thing
I see is that Anissa

is way too old for the bottles
that you're giving her.

She just gets what she
wants whenever she wants.

And the bottle is
just an enhancement

of the other things.

AMBER DIRKS: You
have mental issues.

Little Anissa is not
chugging the bottles.

And something that
really bothers me

is those doors being locked.

Doors being locked makes me
very, very, very nervous.

Kind of was a slap
in the face, I guess.

Nobody wants to be criticized
for what they're doing.

You find it very hard
to handle the kids.

And, consequently, you're
dumping your children

on grandma to avoid the most
important part of parenting,

disciplining your kids.

You think it's because of
the behavior of the children,

but it's the other way around.

The children are behaving
badly because you don't have

the situation under control.

This is so hard for a
parent because you just

don't want to admit that
something is not right.

I feel in the house that it's
somber, not a lot of happiness.

I really didn't
know what to say

when she said that because it
kind of caught me off guard.

The next thing on
this is for me to come

back with my tools, all right?

So I'm going to give
you guys some time.

And then I'll be back
ready to recruit you.

- All right.
- All right?

OK.

Thank you.

I mean, it choked
me up, you know?

And I thought,
this is not a game.

This is serious.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
After a day of observation,

the problem in the
Dirks' house is clear.

See what Nanny Stella has.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
To avoid using discipline,

dad buys his kids affection
with expensive toys

and mom has completely
lost her parenting will.

[gasp]

Fantastic.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): So
today, I'm giving the Dirks

family their own set of rules.

These are family rules.

I was like, uh-oh,
she's got some stuff.

It may not be what
I want to hear.

I was a little nervous.

And I thought I was
going to get my lashing.

The first rule for you guys
is no more bottles for Anissa.

Ba-ba.

Here, sweetie.

Wait a minute, Nanny Stella,
she has to have a bottle.

My next rule is
stop, look, and listen.

Amari, could
you please get up?

You're not listening.

So what we're going to
do is we're going to stop,

we're going to look
at mom and dad,

and we're going to listen
to what they have to say.

I don't think my
kids have ever stopped,

looked, or listened.

The next one is you
must follow through.

You have to start
being consistent.

Oh my god.

We are so inconsistent.

What are you saying?

NANNY STELLA: A quick
example would be bedtime.

[crying]

NANNY STELLA: When you
say it's bedtime, mean it.

So you must follow through.

Children thrive on
boundaries and consequences.

My next rule-- this one's a
very important one-- if you

bite or hit, you have to sit.

Nissa don't bite.

That behavior is
no longer acceptable.

You understand that, Amari?

Anissa bite me.

NANNY STELLA: I know she did.

Nanny's going to help
you with that problem.

As far as sitting down, it will
be sitting down in time out.

PAUL DIRKS: When she
first brought up timeouts,

I was really skeptical.

I'm like, you know,
this is never going

to work with our children.

I have something to show
you that's going to go

with that rule, these timers.

This one says "Amari."

And it's set for three minutes.

And then press start.

It's not a toy though, guys.

Right.

There's no way it's going
to work for our family.

[beep]

TIMER: Time's up.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): And
after setting down the rules,

I thought I'd start to
tackle the discipline problem

by having the kids
put away their toys

and help tidy up the house.

AMBER DIRKS: Good job, Amari.

PAUL DIRKS: Nanny said that the
kids have way too many toys.

Good job.

I don't think there's
a problem with getting

things for your kids and
wanting the best for them.

Doing a good job, buddy.

You know what I felt like?

I felt motivated.

And I knew that we were
going to be a great team.

Good job!

Help me.

OK, I'll help you.

Oh, baby.

Can I have a kiss?

That make you proud?

That makes me proud, Amari.

Listen, give me five.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): The
next thing I want to work on

is weaning Anissa
off the bottle.

[crying]

No, Anissa.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): I
hope mom can find her willpower

and follow through.

OK, let's come sit with you.

[crying]

OK, I got your
milk right there.

See that?

I got your milk.

I'm going to go get it.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
Anissa is making

this huge fuss at the
fact that Amber didn't

want to give her a bottle.

She refused it in a cup.

Mm.

Want some?
- No!

No!

It got worse and
worse and worse.

[crying]

The struggle of trying to
get the bottle away from Anissa

is going to be very rough.

[crying hysterically]

It was mentally and
physically draining.

It's so much easier to just
give in than to hear all

the screaming and the shouting.

[crying]

Just calm down, OK?

NANNY STELLA: Amber
wanted to give up.

And I had to step in.

OK, right, she's not hurt.

She's angry.

And the thing is, if you give in
now, you're back to square one.

I explained to Amber,
it's really a control

issue more than anything.

And I convinced her that
the best thing to do

is leave Anissa alone.

[crying]

I was horrified
in the fact that,

how am I going to control this?

Oh my god, she is just
so out of control.

[crying]

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
But just when

I feel like we're
making progress,

mom caves in and
gives Anissa a bottle.

I was through.

I'm tired.

I got played like
a game and she won.

NANNY STELLA:
Disciplining your children

is actually a battle of wills.

It's not about
breaking their spirit,

but it's about you
following through.

And, clearly, Amber
doesn't get it.

So far, I've had
some challenges.

But with this new day, I
hope I can start to get

through to these parents.

me, can you feel me?

Amber has an
awesome singing voice,

but she needs to learn how to
be an awesome parent as well.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
While she rehearses downstairs,

Paul keeps the kids
occupied upstairs.

Painting it, Daddy?

OK.

Paul, can I just
ask you a question?

Yeah.

Obviously, you're doing
arts and crafts now with them

and that's enjoying
time with them,

but if you had something to
do and Amber wasn't home,

could you occupy them and
leave them alone or do you feel

it has to be pretty
much, you know,

parent with child all the time?

We usually don't leave them
by themselves because we don't--

we're afraid they'll
get into something.

OK.

Do they never technically
occupy themselves?

Hey, Daddy--

Yeah, usually, they want
us doing stuff with them.

Shark tooth.

PAUL DIRKS: Shark tooth?

AMARI DIRKS: Yeah.

I needed Amber to
have some patience

and he was having none of it.

Make one for me.

OK, I'll stop you right now.

You're trying to have
a conversation with me,

yet he's--

Amari, I'm talking
to Nanny Stella, OK?

Yeah.

Amari, listen, listen to me.

Amari started acting
up when we were painting.

He can be very spoiled at times.

He doesn't listen.

Don't you say talk
with Nanny Stella.

I'm talking to Nanny Stella.

[crying]

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
And when Amari acts up,

it's time to see if
Paul has been listening.

Sit down.

We're not going to have the same
type of day you had yesterday.

My wife tells me we
need to work together,

but she does travel a lot.

There's not going
to be any hitting.

There's not going
to be any kicking.

Now, you stay here in a timeout.

Come on, Anissa.

I really wasn't sure
how it was going to go.

You stay there
until this turns red.

[crying]

PAUL DIRKS: Amari, don't kick.

You're going to sit in
there for two timeouts, OK?

Amari is a very stubborn
headstrong little boy.

[crying]

NANNY STELLA: Paul was letting
Amari move the goalposts.

Instead of him
setting the tone, he

was letting Amari set the tone.

So I stepped in.

- Are you listening?
- No!

Are you listening?

No!

If you don't go
back in timeout,

I'm taking away the DVDs.

Do you want to
lose "Scooby-Doo?"

No.

NANNY STELLA: OK,
count to three.

When I get to three, you
better be on that mat.


No!

And then he whacks me.

And what surprised me
more was Paul immediately

went to comfort Amari.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
Hitting guests in the house

is totally inappropriate.

So I decided to sit
down with Paul to find

out how severe the problem is.

But I heard Amari started
acting out, if you will,

at a year and a half?

I guess it all
started when he got

suspended from his preschool.

He's come home with scratches.

He's got a scar on
his cheek, his arms.

PAUL DIRKS: It got to the
point, I come home from work

or even call on the way home
and she's all pissed off

and stressed out.

And then so I get
home and I don't

want to be around that either.

What did he actually do
that got him suspended?

Bit a kid in the crotch.

NANNY STELLA: He bit
a kid in the crotch?

Yeah.

Little Amari had been
booted out of his preschool

for biting a little
boy in the crotch.

Did you get any
warnings for that?

No.

NANNY STELLA: No,
but he got suspended?

- Yeah.
- OK.

Well, we'll see what
we can do, all right?

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): Now
I know how bad Amari's behavior

really is and I'm more
determined than ever to get

this family on the right path.

But despite our talk,
instead of finishing timeout,

Paul takes Amari to the
playroom, once again,

distracting him with toys.

He is obviously not getting it.

I'm proud of him.

And kids are kids.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): And
later on, Amber has to leave

for the evening to sing.

She has a lot of
nights, you know, she'll

have to leave to go sing.

I love you.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): So
once again, she calls for help.

You want this one?

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
It is grandma to the rescue.

Oh, she is funny.

You didn't put on you--
screwed this up, mm-mm.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
With mom off singing--


NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
--and dad working, grandma

is left to parent
these children.

You're hitting Oma?

No.

What did you do?

What do you say to me?

Da!

Stand up.

Give me a kiss and a hug.

NANNY STELLA

as things get a little
difficult with the kids,

I see a familiar pattern.

Grandma marches the
kids off to their rooms.

I was very taken aback.

Stop it.

Leave it.

OK, 1, 2.

Don't turn the light off.

See you later, OK?

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
And she too locks the doors.

I decided someone
had to step in

and properly parent these
children and I meant business.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
My time with the Dirks

family is almost up.

These parents are preoccupied
with their hobbies

and they're dumping their
children with grandma.

I really need to make an
effort to get through to them.

Can we just have a
couple, couple of minutes?

Oh, most defintiely.

I really needed to make it
clear how serious parenting is.

Disciplining your
children is part

of the role of being a parent.

If I don't have this
conversation with you,

I'm doing you guys an
injustice, me an injustice,

and those kids an injustice.

Because as seriously as
you take going to the gym

and as seriously as you
take that beautiful singing

of yours, this is
how seriously I take

helping you and your family.

The look and tone of Nanny
Stella was very serious.

I need to know
that you won't give

up when the going gets tough.

Because that's when we all
go back in our shell and say,

this is too hard
and I can't do it.

It is going to work
the longer and harder

that you two stick at it.

So it's about you being as
dedicated to this as that

fantastic singing
and you being as

dedicated to going to the gym.

PAUL DIRKS: Nanny Stella,
she doesn't hold back.

It's actually what we needed
because, obviously, what we're

currently doing isn't working.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
Now that I've had a chance

to sit down with mom and
dad, I'm curious to see

if this talk had any impact.

Listen to me, can you go
upstairs and play on the train

and all your other little toys?

[whines].

Amari, use your
tiny voice, honey.

You don't have to
scream so loudly.

Ah!

Amari, yet again,
was not cooperating.

And he was going to be
mom's next challenge.

Did you just hit me?

Boy, sit over here.

I'm not playing now.

NANNY STELLA

like mom is finally making
an effort to discipline,

as she puts Amari in timeout.

You need to stay there.

Amari.

[crying]

Guess what?

Now you've got more time.

She kept putting
him in timeout.

He wouldn't stay there.

She kept putting him in timeout.

OK, that's it.

No.

I'm not playing.

Amari, you need to listen.

[crying]

NANNY STELLA: Amber really
wasn't getting very far.

She was actually
losing the battle.

Amari was wearing her down.

I tried everything
to control this child.

What can I do to get
this boy to listen to me?

Stay here.

NANNY STELLA: Time
was running out

and I was going to have to show
Amari that I meant business.

OK, I'm back in charge now.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
And mom was going to see

exactly how to take control.

[screaming]

Amari, you are in timeout, OK?

No.

He's just such a
strong-willed child that he

was trying to compete with her.

No.

Well, you just lost
your TV privilege.

No more TV.

It was a battle of wills.

Amari is a very stubborn
headstrong little boy.

I'm going to be
very, very fair to you.

If you don't go in timeout now,
I'm taking away the alligator.

OK.

OK, I'm taking the alligator.

Where's my bag?

And when she started
to take the toys away,

Amari did not like that at all.

NANNY STELLA: 1, 2, 3, OK,
dinosaur is going with Nanny.

No!

No, I'm not messing about.

[yells]

Oh, thank you.

The nanny bag
quickly filled up.

I'm going to take everything.

All the toys are going
unless you go in timeout.


On that mat, come on.

Because otherwise, I'm
taking all the toys.

Amber and Paul
really haven't said

what they mean and mean it.

They've never followed through
to the level that I did.

Stay on the mat.

Amari, 1.

You see all these toys?

They're going
bye-byes, all of them.

Get back on the mat, please.

I actually didn't expect he
was going to lose all of them.

I thought he would go back
into timeout, but he didn't.

OK, you blew it.

Everything's gone,
absolutely everything.

AMBER DIRKS: Now you ruined
it for your sister too.

I'm going to clear the floor.

I'm taking everything.

No.

Know what?

Amari, get over here.

Get on that mat right now.

Amari, hey!

Somebody get that child.

Oh, god.

Hey, somebody get that child.

Oh, god.

Amari!

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
When Amari runs outside,

I can see mom is shaken.

That freaked me out.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): I need
mom to understand that Amari is

out of control
behavior could get

dangerous if she doesn't get
serious about disciplining him.

- Yeah.
- No!

Now you know I mean business.

NANNY STELLA: And when
we get back inside,

I make it clear to both of them
I'm not giving up on timeout.

You have no toys left.

I'm going to have to
take away the train.

[crying]

You know your very,
very special train?

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): I
don't care how long this takes,

but mom needs to know that
there is no easy way out

and Amari needs to understand
that I won't back down.

You stay here and you'll
get to keep your train.

Did you not understand
what I said to you?

Do you want to lose your train?

No.

I guess you do.

She was persistent.

She was not going
to let him win.

She marched upstairs into the
playroom and took the train.

And I think at that point,
Amari saw that Nanny

Stella was not playing.

[cry]

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
When Amari finally

realizes that this
could go on forever,

he simmers down and
finishes his timeout.

TIMER: Time's up.

OK, you can come out now.

The timeout was so tough
because nobody's ever

been as consistent with Amari.

And I have to explain
to him why his actions

weren't appropriate.

You're mad because
you lost your toys?

Yeah.

Yeah, but, you know what?

That was your choice.

You either listen or
you lose your toys.

I want to listen.

You want to listen?

If you listen, you can earn your
toys back, little by little.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER): I
hope mom finally understands

the importance of not
walking out on your children

when it gets tough.

But with the little
time left, I wasn't

going to take any chances.

You let it get out of control
and stay out of control for way

too long.

I felt like I was a
failure to my children.

You said you have projects.

But, honestly, you
work all day and

if you have the opportunity to
have them more, that is better.

Because being irritated
with them as soon as you get

home is not fair.

They're not getting the
attention that they need.

Let me just clarify
though to you.

I felt it in the
house, unhappy parents.

We're unhappy
with the behavior.

We're unhappy--

With our parenting.

Right.

NANNY STELLA: The solution is
to fix the children's behavior,

not escape from it because
you're overwhelmed.

I knew Nanny Stella was right
and I was ashamed of myself.

You can't live your
life through avoidance.

Right.

I was wrong.
- OK.

AMBER DIRKS: And I
apologize to you for that.

I appreciate that.

You are here to help
us get on the path

that we need to be so that
we can be successful parents.

Which you are being.

Thank you.

They need to have discipline
and it needs to be consistent.

Let's just keep it real.

You know, you keep it real.

You don't play games.

And that's what we need.

We need to get our butts kicked.

At this point, I definitely
feel that Amber is on board.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
Mom was escaping

because she felt overwhelmed.

Now that I've given her the
tools she needs to discipline

her kids, the
behavior will improve

and she can be a more
active and happy parent.

And in the days that
followed, mom and dad

made a real effort to make
time for their children.

Yay, you're doing
a good job, Amari.

NANNY STELLA

is slowly understanding
the importance

of giving your
children limits and not

spoiling them with toys.

Can you go tell
mommy you're sorry?

Yeah.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
And now that Amari

is beginning to understand that
bad behavior has consequences,

his behavior is improving.

PAUL DIRKS: You sharing Amari?

Good boy.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
When the kids do misbehave,

mom is learning
to discipline them

properly instead of giving up--

TIMER: Time's up.

Amari, you did a
good job sitting there.

NANNY STELLA

in turn, has made for a much
calmer, happier household.

Do you like it?

Yes, I do.

That's very nice.

I'm actually very
happy that Amari

has made the progress he has.

Daddy.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
But before I leave,

I want to see if mom can
stick to the no bottles rule.

And when a tantrum erupts
with Anissa in the kitchen,

it is the perfect opportunity.

[crying]

You'll get a ba-ba tonight.

OK, I'm going to just
leave this here for you.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
Anissa wanted a bottle.

And I was interested to see if
mom would stick to the rules

or cave in.

[whimpers].

Good job, Anissa.

NANNY STELLA: It
was a huge success.

This little girl never ever
ever drank milk out of a cup

until today.

That wasn't a little success.

That was a huge success.

I'm actually doing
something right, you know,

for our family.

NANNY STELLA (VOICEOVER):
Now that I have seen mom

sticking to the rules and no
longer spoiling her daughter,

I know that the week
has been worthwhile

and all that's left
to do is say goodbye.

Hey, guys, it's
time for me to go.

It was time to say goodbye.

And they all came
in and sat down.

I want to say thank
you for allowing me

the pleasure to come
into your beautiful home.

PAUL DIRKS: Knowing that
this was the last day

and that she was going to be
leaving it kind of makes you

a little nervous
about, how are we

going to do while she's gone?

Paul, you've done an
absolutely awesome job.

I'm really proud of you.

I think as long as
you guys keep it up,

it's going to be amazing.

This was a day that
I did not want to see.

You know, I wish Nanny
Stella lived next door.

Are you not going
to bite anymore?

No.

OK, mwah.

NANNY STELLA: My biggest
hope is that they can

appreciate what they've got.

They're a beautiful couple.

They have two
beautiful children.

The biggest acknowledgment is
going to mom because that was

the real reason that I came.

Finally, I realized that I'm
not a failure and as a team,

we're going to see this through.

Thank you so much.

You're very welcome.

NANNY STELLA: The biggest
accolade goes to Amber.

One, she's made leaps
and bounds, but, two,

really facing up to the truth
and combating her problems.

I'm going to give hugs.

Thank you.

Stick at it, OK?

Thank you.

AMBER DIRKS: I've
learned from her

what you need to do to
make your home a more

peaceful, happy place to be in.

Hey, Amari, any
chance of a hug?

Be a good boy, OK?

I'll see you next time
when I come to visit.

PAUL DIRKS: She came
in and gave us a lot

of great tools and advice.

We're definitely planning
on putting our best

effort at making it work.

You did a good job, babe.

You too.

NANNY STELLA: The Dirks
really do have a lot

of hard work ahead of them.

It's much easier when the
nanny is in the house.

But they both can achieve it
with hard work and consistency.

You got it.

Let me do it for you.

OK, can you put this on?

I got a happy face.

You did get happy faces.

Happy face.


She's a toddler, huh, toddler.

She's not a baby.

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