05x04 - Sweet Sixteen

[bunniefuu]

This programme contains
very strong language

from the outset and throughout.

♪ PULP: Babies

Just be careful, she...
Watch yourself, it's hot.

Just be quiet.

Don't give it away, mate.
She's gonna love it.

Bit on the side there.
OK.

Have you got a lighter?
That's it, Ronnie.

Right.

Sshh.
Sshh.

Hang on.

Come in.

BOTH: ♪ Happy Birthday to you

♪ Happy Birthday to you...
Is that a f*cking pork pie?

Birthday digs!
f*ck off, dickhead!

MAN: Neil!

Neil f*cking Croft!

Where's our f*cking money?
f*ck! Erin, fetch your wages.

Dad! Not again.

I'll pay you back, I swear.

I'm opening a new leaf. I just...
I need to get a few things sorted.

Where is our f*cking money, Neil?

Dad...
Stay in there. Look after her.

MAN: Where's our f*cking money,
Neil?

You said you'd have it!
Where the f*ck is it?

Well, at least it's not
f*cking pissing it down.

CAROL:
No, but it's an awful day for it.

Thanks for coming, everyone.

Especially you,
with what's going in on with JJ.

Oh, well, this is more important.

I have you a present.
Go on.

It's a chocolate mouse.
Adyan?

if you want to go to the pier,
just go.

Are you sure? You don't want me to,
you know...Right, just go.

I'm sorry for your loss.

Who does that? Who cadges a lift
with a funeral possession

to f*ck off to a fun fair?

I must say, it's very unusual.
Come on, let's get this over with.

Come on. Let's mourn.

That'll be five pounds, please.

You what?
Five pounds.

Five pounds for f*cking what?
To get in?

Are you having a giraffe?

Her dad's just f*cking d*ed.
It's to help pay off Neil's debts.

He owed a lot of people a lot of
money. "Bai-leafs" are after him.

I'm sorry.

f*ck's sake.
Unreal.Here.

Thanks.

f*cking hell.
You can have that, an' all.

CAROL: I'll pay for two.
ASHLEY: Charger.

Weed.

♪ BARRETT STRONG: Money

♪ The best things in life are free,
but you can give them to the... ♪

CAROL: I want a fiver.
That was me last tenner.

I paid for you.

SUGAR: He'd be amazed if he saw you
now, Erin. I bet he missed you.

The only thing Neil Croft missed

was my f*cking wages
after he f*cked off.

Oh, where did you work?

A doughnut stall.

Oh.

When was the last
time you saw a jam doughnut?

I see 'em all time.
You can't have done

cos I think they're quite rare.
Hello.

Sorry,
is one of you Neil's daughter?

Yeah, I am. I am.
Great.

Emma.
Erin.

So, I'm looking for
his other daughter, erm, Emma.

Yeah, there's no Emma.
It's just me. It's Erin.

Well, if Emma's running late,

maybe you'd say
a few words about your dad.

Cos, obviously,
people have paid an entry fee.

I didn't really knew him that well.

So, I feel a bit uncomfortable,
like, going up.

Oh, we'll just muddle through, then,
won't we?

OK, everybody. Everyone, hello.

Thank you so much

for coming to say goodbye
to Neil Croft.

What can we say about- ?

Neil Croft?!

What? Not Arnold Waller?

No, this is Neil Croft's funeral.

Oh, for God's sake.

So, as I was saying,

on this devastating day

for the rest of us here,

it's wonderful that we've got
someone who knew him so very well.

We're gonna hear a few words
now from his beloved daughter, Emma.

Erin!

Go on, you can do it...Emma.

Go on, Emma!
Go on, Emma.

Hello.

I'm Erin, I'm Neil Croft's daughter.

We didn't really keep in touch,
after he er...

he f*cked off...

when I was just 16.

I do regret not staying in contact
with him.

Because then I'd be able
to tell him to his face...

..what a sh*t show of a dad he was.

And I'd ask for my money
that he owed me.

Never gonna get that back now, am I?

And I could tell him what life
I've made for myself, for my son.

Despite the fact that he f*cked off
and he was a sh*t dad,

I think that-

Heyyy!

f*cking hell.

Erin! Hold me!

Ronnie?
I'm broken up. I'm heart-broken.

Ronnie, please, don't do this now.

Oh, my chest, it breaks.

Erin...

Everyone...

have I missed the will?

Oi! Give us that "Dad" back now!
f*ck's sake.

f*ck!
Ronnie!

Who the f*ck are all these?

This is yours. Yeah, OK, thank you.

Sorry. Emma, is it?
It's Erin!

Right, well, anyway, that man,
he said you'd pay his entry, so...

I can stay.
It's just therapy session,

then I've got to go
and see what's going on with JJ.

No, you can't miss therapy.

And JJ hasn't seen anyone
for a few days, so..

Oh, and you need to pick Tyler up
from Jim's.Yeah, I do. Bollocks.

Christ, what does he see in
that crusty old turd of a babysitter?

I know.
Do you, though?

Er, send JJ my love, yeah?
I will do. I will do.

Shugs, Vinnie's gonna go see JJ.

Do you want him to pass on anything?
No.

No.No. It's a firm no.
Alright.See you later, love.

Erin Croft? Neil's daughter?

Jesus! Yeah, who's asking?

Your dad, Neil.

We were lovers.

Right?

He wanted me to give this to you,
if he didn't get the chance.

What are they?

The flat on Pier Avenue.

He wanted you to have it.

He wanted me to have the flat?

Oh, yeah.

I was there when he got it
all sorted with a lawyer.

He really did love you Erin.

Not in the way he loved me,
obviously...

Obviously!

But he loved you all the same.

Cheerio, love.

Ha ha ha!

Shugs? Shugs!

I've got keys to my Dad's flat.
Oh, my God!

Go, go, go!
I've got keys to my Dad's flat.

My dad's flat! My dad's flat!

Can you believe it?

Oh, my God!

Oh, f*ck it.

'It was my tenth birthday.

'I was excited.

'So, stupidly, I asked my Dad if he'd
got me a present. And he was drunk.

' He say's, "Yeah. Yeah, I do."

'Off we set, to go and pick it up.

'Walk over a couple of fields,

'and I can smell this f*cking smell.

'It's getting closer and closer.
Like rot.

'Almost sweet-smelling.'

'Then we get to an abattoir.

'And it looks exactly how it sounds.'

'It's a bad word -

'"abattoir."

'Anyway,
so he tells me to close my eyes,

'and he walks me round the
back of the building,

'and when I open my eyes,
we're in this...

'like a pit of all these off-cuts,

'f*cking hooves and horns,
and sh*t like that.

'And he plunges his hands
in to all this f*cking flesh,

' and find this bull's head...

'covered in dry blood, and he hands
this f*cking thing to me.

'That was it,
that was my birthday present.

'He walked me through Hawley.

'Everyone could see us.

'He had the head in his right hand.

'My hand in his left. Christ.

THERAPIST:
'How did that make you feel?'

'I just couldn't understand it.

'I was just too young for that.'

'What would like to say to that
child, holding your dad's hand?'

'I'd tell him not to end up like him.

'"Hold on to who you are.

'"And maybe next year get a f*cking
bike, or summat." I don't know."'

Does it affect how you feel
about your birthday?

Yeah.

And I f*cking hate it.

On a day when you're meant
to be happy.

You know.?

Could we cut the session a bit
shorter today, do you think?

Cos I've got a lot of sh*t going on.

My friend JJ's in the nick
and I'm worried about him, you know.

Well, you're already here.

It might not seem like progress
to you, but it is.

I think you should stay.

But it's alright for you to
reschedule whenever you fancy, in it?

You know, you've got me writing
f*cking lists. I mean, Jesus Christ.

This thing, it's like a f*cking
a-la-carte menu

of all my worst problems.

"Fear of abandonment, fear
of f*cking change, loneliness."

f*cking... I don't know what it's
supposed to do? Know what I mean?!

Well sometimes it's
good to contain things, to know

what's really bothering you.
I don't need f*cking reminding

of all this bull sh*t. I just don't
see what it's meant to f*cking...

Do you know what? Bollocks, keep it.
I'm f*cking it off.

Christ.

See you next week.

♪ LONGPIGS: She Said

Cocaine in the f*cking garage?

You couldn't've talked to me
about it?

Do you think I knew
it was f*cking there? Huh?

Do you think I would f*cking risk
that?

Well, who the f*ck's-It was f*cking
Sarim. Your cousin Sarim?

I am innocent, alright?

I'll sort it, just leave it with me
I'll get you bail?

Oh, apparently I'm a risk in case
I "fly back home," which is...

Hawley, by the way!

Bloody bunch of racists!

You can't f*cking be here,
for something you haven't done.

I will not have it,
it's not fair, alright?

Mark my words, I swear,

as God is my judge,
I am gonna track that fucker down...

like a bloodhound.

And he will be begging for mercy
by the time I'm finished wi' him.

Dah! Ah! Dude!

No. Put me down! Put me... Come on!
f*cking put me the f*ck down!

Ugh.

I mean, f*ck's sake.

Told you I could do it.
I f*cking believed you.!

Now, look, just... f*ck me, dude,
I want you to own up!

To all this f*cking shite
you've created! Eh?

Or at least help me break him out
of f*cking jail, you sexy arsehole.

It was his own idea.

Oh...

..sh*t!He said he needed
the extra cash for his kid,

and that he does this stuff all
the time, with you losers.

He f*cking lied to you.

f*ck!

SUGAR: 'Oh, look at this.'

Oh, God.
Oh, jeez.

It stinks.

It's a bit musty.

There's my old bedroom.
Let me have a look in.

It hasn't changed.
Erin, it's big.

Oh, look at the wallpaper.
I know!

Look, you can see the sea front.

Oh, look, you can see the pier!
I know! I used to work on there!

Oh, God,
it's so weird being back here.

Still a sh*t hole.

Yes, but it's yours. I know it needs
a bit of a spring clean,

but I bet you this place is worth
a f*cking fortune now.

Hello!
Oh, God.

Early signs of the fashionista
that was to emerge.

Oh, no, no, look. This is me
and our Ronnie's heights.

You know, you measure against
the wall, the heights?So cute.

Oh, my God.
My God.

Tyler would love this, wouldn't he?
Somewhere next to the sea.

Yeah!
And now you f*cking do!

ALL: Yeah!

That's not a good

Erin Croft?

Yeah?

We brought you these.

Sorry to hear about your dad passing.
May we come in?

Sorry, have we met?
We're the Bai-leafs.

You don't look like bailiffs.

It's not "bai-liff."

It's "Bai-leaf."

Now, Erin....

Where's our money?
What money?

The money Neil Croft owes us.
Where is it?

You're his daughter, aren't you?

I don't know anything
about the f*cking money.

I haven't seen
him for 15 f*cking years.

See, your dear dad
said you would help.

Said you'd sort it for him
if he came to pass,

and look at that, he came to pass.

So now the debts yours.

Debt we want paid.
Ten grand.

Ten grand?

Ten grand?
No. You're having a laugh.

Ugh!
Now, Billy...

Erin didn't mean to rude.

I'm sure she'll fetch our money now

from where every her pilfering
wet fish of a father-

I haven't got your f*cking money!

Well, woman to woman I understand

how unreliable our men can be,

so there was always the possibility
you might not come up with it.

Billy's a gentleman.

He won't hurt you,
or your friends here.

But your brother...Ronnie.

No-one would notice
if he went missing.

I don't know where he is, I haven't
seen him for, what, years?

Oh, Erin?!

I said, Erin!
You were saying?

You lying little twat!
Get him, Billy!

Ronnie!
Ugh!

Oh, no, not again! Ahh!

You gonna come through
for your old man?

I'm too old for this bullshit.
Do what you want with him.

Erin, Erin, my fingers!

Alright, alright, alright!

f*ck!
I'll get you your money.

Ten grand by tomorrow. And we'll keep
Ronnie with us until then.

What? Erin?
Teach him some manners.

Ugh! Erin?

Erin, does that...?
Erin drop me a text or summat!

Take his f*cking phone off him!
I'll get you on MySpace.

♪ ROBERT JOHNSON:
I'm A Steady Rollin' Man

Come on. Nearly there.

No!

No!

'Ey!

Oh, for f*ck's sake.
Get here now.

What the f*cking hells that?

Hiya, Dad! Is Mum back?

Never mind. Put it down!
Don't put it down, you'll spoil her!

What do you mean, "her?"
Is that a body bag!?

Well, how else am I supposed
to f*cking steal 'em?

Are you stealing bodies
with my child?

It's a f*cking scarecrow!

Jim thinks the crows are inviting
their friends to his field.

They f*cking are!

So, for every crow I see,
another one of these goes in.

So I'd like to keep hold of Tyler

for a bit longer
to help with the formation.

Hell, no, dude,
you ain't borrowing my child

for any more of this bullshit!

What's up your arse, anyway?
Ears.

JJ has hidden f*cking cocaine
in his garage.

Now he's looking at f*cking jail
time. Can't even get the c**t bail.

You're alright.
I heard everything.Shut up!

Course you can get f*cking bail.

Every person has the right to bail
before conviction.

It's a matter of law, Vinnie.

It's not a matter of opinion.

How the f*ck do you know all that?

You are an actual lawyer?

It's from Guatemala.
Read a couple of books,

answer a couple of questions,
and that's it.

It's a piece of piss.

I can do dental work in Paraguay
and marry you in California.

Come here. Come here!

Get the f*ck off! Vinnie!

Vinnie, f*ck off!

Right, how the hell are
we gonna find ten grand by tomorrow?

We could knock over
a fish and chip shop maybe?

What and steal ten thousand battered
sausages? Have a bit of respect.

Where's Tommo?
Gone back to Hawley.

He had to go back to the Rat And
Cutter. He's got a stag do on.

Couldn't we all just go back
to Hawley?No, we can't go back.

They've got Ronnie. Imagine what
they'd do if we just f*cked off.

And that's a deal breaker is it?
It's not a major loss.

We don't need-
Yes, Carol it's a deal breaker!

Shut up! Shut up!
Shut up! Let me think!

Kick in the balls.

Oh, yeah!
Wahey!

Why have you got so many of these,
Erin?

I used to launder 'em for cash.
Right, you ready?

One, two, three...

When I worked at the pier, there was
a safe full of cash in the office.

We're gonna steal it. Right now.

The plan.

'OK, it's a risky one,
but here is my idea.

'We go in wearing
these old work shirts.

'Pretend to be staff,
scope out the arcade.

'Carol, you sweet-talk
the security guys.

'Find out if there's a weak point, a
way to get back on the Pier tonight.

'Check doors, windows,
gates anything.

'OK, Sugar, cameras.

'There's CCTV all over the place,

'but you can disable the system
from a control room in the arcade.

'Get in there and mess it up.

'Right, while you two
are doing that,

'I'll see if I can get hold
of a keycard.

'I have a sneaky idea for that.

'Get myself
into the manager's office,

'and get the code to the safe.

'I get one go.'

What?

Sorry, er, the girl from Donuts
wants some er, change.



Haven't seen your face before.

You new or summat?

No.

What you wearing an old uniform for?
We haven't had those in years.

I, er... I just...
I like vintage stuff.

So, I...

I'm... I'm studying fashion,
actually, at fashion school.

I mean, I can change it if you want.
I can get in to a new one.

No. That's lovely.

Well, turn around, then.

Oh, sorry.

Carol.
Oh, job done.

Now, the gates are locked
at night inside and out,

and only the owners have the key.
Right, well, how we gonna get in?

Well, being the smart arse
that I am,

I've released the emergency ladder
further down the pier.

All we have to do is climb up a bit
and we're in.

You're welcome.
Well done. OK, right, where's Sugar?

Who the f*ck are you!?

Erm...

I know what you're doing, sweetheart.

Trying to find a little corner,

so you can hide away and nap,
keep earning for the egg.

I don't blame you
cos once you've had 'em,

they never stop asking for stuff.

But the new bosses won't allow it.

Can't have preggos near drunks
or dodgems;

the insurance won't cover it.

I'm sorry, love.

I'm gonna have to let you go.

I'll tell you what,

treat yourself to some
pick 'n' mix on your way out, on me.

Medium scoop.

'They sacked me!'

I've never been sacked ever!

Sugar, you don't f*cking work here!
You... You silly bitch.

Did you sort the CCTV out?

No.We've got a bigger problem
than cameras, Erin.

What?!

'There's only suitable
entrance to the arcade

'is blocked by these
f*cking security shutters.

' There's a release button,
but it's on the f*cking inside here.'

Gonna need an inside man.

'There you go.'
'A f*cking dinghy.'

We're not gonna fit in that, like.
Course we will.

Tommo's not with us.
What difference will that make?

How much do you think Tommo f*cking
weighs? He's like a conker.Conker?

It's like a nut.
It's denser than a nut, very much.

It's a small turnip.
It's nothing like a f*cking turnip.

Stop with the conker chat, please!

We need to focus!

Right,
here how it's gonna work tonight.

'We'll row out to the ladder,
were gonna climb up,

'scoot along to the shutters.

'Once we're in,
we'll get all the money

'and the spare key to the front gate
out of the safe.

'Head for the front,
meet Sugar in the van

'and disappear into the night.'

Bob's your uncle.
Fanny's your aunt. Let's go!

What about the CCTV that's still on?

Cardi's got masks.

Hello!
All we need now is our inside man.

Ha ha ha!

Not a f*cking chance
I'm going in there.

I'm not a f*cking goldfish.
Stop moaning, get in.

Come on! Come on!

Go. Go. Go. Go.

There we go. Cover yourself up
with teddies and go to sleep.

There's a sandwich in your pocket.

Here he is.
Oi, get your sh*t together.

Are you sure you can do this, man?

I can't promise anything, but bail.

But you can promise bail,
though, yeah?

Battle of the minds, Vinnie.

Battle of the minds.
How does that even...?

Don't take the file.
And the f*cking beret.

Take the beret off!

We're f*cked, you know.
Yeah.

I am here to talk to my client,

a Mister Jehan Jevani.

I'm his lawyer.

f*ck off. You're his lawyer?
Mm.

This is the biggest
bag of shite I've ever heard.

Go on, then, show us your ID.

Go on. This reeks of Vincent O'Neil.

f*ck off!

You f*cked it up, didn't you?

I got him off on bail.
f*ck off!

He'll be tagged tomorrow afternoon!
Yeah!

Fantastic, man.You should've seen
his face. Yes! Yes!

:
'16 things I am gonna f*cking do

'even if someone f*cking tells me
I won't.

'Start my own business.

'Punch Jack Powell in the face.

'Move to Australia.

'Don't come back here to be stuck
doing nothing with my life.'

You OK?

Yeah.

How you coping with everything?

How am I gonna do this on my own?
Without JJ?

I can't even hold down
a f*cking fake job.

Right, come here.
Come and sit with me, come on.

Right, listen,
you are not on your own, OK?

You've got
me, you've got your mum, Carol...

You've got me, anyway.

And it's not gonna be easy,
but we'll make it work.

How, though?

how do you do it?

I don't know, you just...do.

You wake up one day
and you realise you've done it.

Or you realise that you're doing it.

I'm so angry with him, Erin.

It's like he waited until everything
was perfect and then f*cked it up.

I just thought
we could have something new,

a life I've never had.

What's this?

Oh, it's just something
I used to write in as a kid.

There's so many things
I wanted to do.

Yet here I am.
In the same f*cking flat.

Sorting out my Dad's sh*t.

I'm sure your dad
didn't plan for him to do this.

No, he didn't.

He didn't plan for anyone
but himself.

Oh, for f*ck's sake.

Who checked the tides?You can get
rid of that f*cking boat.

♪ WOLFMOTHER: Woman

This is it.

Yes, come on!

Well done.
Whoo-hoo!

Ash, go on.

Why's it always f*cking me?
Just come on.

You were in the feckin' circus.

You've got muscles, come on.

Oh! Oh, f*cking hell!

Oh, my God, you're not one of them
murdering clowns, are you?

No. No, erm, I just haven't washed
my face from work. I work here.

Robbo Dobbo Doodah at your service.

What the f*ck are you doing in here?

Oh, I live here.


What? You... You live here?

Er...Mum and Dad kicked me out.

So, I've been holed up here since.

♪ THE FRIGHTNRS: All My Tears

ERIN: Right, masks on.

Come on. Ready? Let's go.

CARDI: That's awful.

She said I had less personality
than that little bit of water

hat forms on expired yogurt.

Well, Nan's can be very nasty.

She's, right though. I'm not a man!.

You are a man.
I'm not.

You ARE a man!

You got legs, haven't you? And arms.

And a f-f-f-face, and hair.

Yeah, but so have they!

ERIN:
Ash, what the f*ck are you doing?

ASHLEY: Sorry.You're not f*cking
Rambo, are you?OK. Sorry.

Why'd you knock four times?Because
it's my secret squirrel knock.

Cardi!

Don't go!
You're the first person around here

that's really understood me!

Well, m-maybe that's cos you're
surrounded by stuffed animals, mate.

Real people don't get me.

Look, sometimes people
don't have to get you.

Sometimes you've just got
to follow them round

until they think it's weird
when you're not there.

That's what I did.

You'll be alright.

Thanks, Cardi.
Anytime, Robbo.

See you at t'clock.

I need to get out.
You've got my Benny!

Yeah, no, I think so.
Oh, sorry. S-S-Sorry, Benny.

'That were weird.'

Yes, Cardi.
Aye, aye. Good man. Good job.

Alright?
ERIN: Cardi, put this on.

CAROL: Did you eat your sandwich?

Oh, that's Robbo.
Just give him a wave, would you.

Cardi, you got a new friend?

ERIN: Come on,
the safe's through here.

See you in a bit.

Right, here we go.

f*ck.Where's the f*cking notes? You
said nothing about f*cking coins!

They normally change it
on a Thursday!



Right, you know what, money's money.
Cardi, gimme the bags.There you go.

Cardi, why are you giving me
plastic bags?

They're perfect for notes. These are
f*cking coins! What good are coins?

Next time, we could maybe steal
a big old barrel full of bricks.

ERIN: No. Cardi.
Yeah?

Left!
Left!No. No.

I said f*cking left.

Who the f*ck are you?!

Run! Run!

Get down there! Go! Go!

♪ DECLAN MCKENNA: Bombs

ERIN: Come on! Come on!

You thieving little bastards,
I'll k*ll youse all!

Freeze!

Ahh!

f*ck!What are you gonna do,
sh**t at us with an air r*fle?

It's a f*cking child's toy!

Don't provoke her!
Don't provoke her!

f*cking Jesus!

♪ URIAH HEEP: Easy Livin'

I don't know who you are,

but if you give us the money back,
I'll let you go!

ADYAN: f*cking hell. f*cking hell.
f*cking hell.

What the f*ck is that?

CARDI: It's a giant gobstopper.

What, with bubble gum?
I don't know. I hope so.

Swapsies for a coconut?
f*cking, no!

Shut up!

CAROL: sh*t.
What the f*ck are they doing here?

ERIN: They must be the new owners!

Can you hear that?
ERIN: Ash, go and have a look.

Go on.
Is there somebody in there?

Oh!
f*ck off! f*ck off! f*ck off!

Who the f*ck are you lot!?
Cat women?Sshh! Sshh!

It's me.
Erin?

Yes.
Is that you? Who the f*ck are you?

Ashley. Ashley.
I've got my sister Carol.

What the f*ck are you doing in there?

They f*cking toileted me.
They tied me to the toilet
like a wild but sexy beast.

I've gotta f*cking get out of here.
Why have they done that to you?

The small one, the tiny gangster,
looks like she fell off a keyring?

I said that her hands
look like tiny bird's hands.

Yeah.Next thing you know.
Ronnie tied to the toilet.

I'm gonna keep on sh**ting animals
until I hit the right one.

Ahh!

We need to f*cking go. Come on.
f*ck it.

Erin, you go first and I won't.
Dickhead.

I am right behind you.

Oi!
sh*t!

Erin f*cking Croft!

Go on, have it, you bastards!

♪ SUPERGRASS: Mansize Rooster

ERIN Hide. Get down. Get down.

Where are the others?

I'm gonna get you, Erin Croft.

f*ck. Where are the others?

You and your runty little c**t
of a brother!

Hello, boys.
No!

Oh, you bastards!

It's all over, kiddies!

I don't f*cking think so, bitch!

Agh!

Run, Cardi!
Thanks, Robbo! You're a legend!

You're sacked, knobhead!

♪ SUPERGRASS: Mansize Rooster

Sugar! Get in!

f*cking hell!
You didn't have to bury it!

Come on, come on!
f*cking drive!

f*cking sh**t 'em!
It's jammed! sh*t!

I know where you live,
you little bastards!

The Baileafs will be coming for us.
What the f*ck are we gonna do?

Why don't we very much try
and fight them with our hands?

There's more of us than them.
Or we could just give them Ronnie.

It might do him good.
f*ck's sake, Carol.

Sorry for trying to put a positive
spin on this pig's ear of a night!

We've got f*cking £26.50 here,
if that helps?

I mean...

I'm probably gonna f*ck off...

..now, to be honest..

Don't you f*cking dare leave her.
I won't. I'm not gonna.

Ronnie!

Hey, Sugar, leave him.

Ronnie Croft?
Ronnie Croft!

Do me a favour, could you?
What's up!

Take this up to Erin.
I'm late for my round.

I've got to keep my hands busy
now your dad's gone.

Yeah.
It's to go with the flat.

OK.
I don't know who the f*ck you are.

Erin?

What do you want?

Come on, Erin.

Erin.What?
Can I give you a cuddle?

No, you cannot give me a cuddle!
Just a little hug. Come on.

Erin. I love you.

Right, too far. Gone way too far.

Do you know what, Erin?
I always look out for you.

You don't.
I do.

And you don't need my help. Do you
wanna know why? Cos of your brain.

and it's just like that. Whooh.

Just constant, do you know what
I mean, with f*cking...

Oh, anyway, what's going on
over here?What you doing?

Look at that picture of Taylor.

It's Tyler. It's f*cking Tyler.
Going for a fly!

Why, you f*cking idiot? This better
not be f*cking smashed,

I'll tell you what.

What you doing?

Just chilling out.Have
you got something behind your back?

Give me it! Yeah, you f*cking have.

You f*cking have. Give me it.

Give it...
What's he up to now?

What have you got?
What the f*ck? What is this?

What is this, Ronnie?
I was gonna split it!

I was.Did you know about this
the whole time?

When we're about to get our f*cking
heads kicked in!

I didn't f*cking know!

I didn't. And I was gonna split it
with you, 50-60!

That's what I'm saying. Look, look,
I've got this, it's from your dad!

You little prick.

I don't know what this...
I don't know what this is.

"My beautiful daughter Erin.

"If the Baileafs come,

"the money is in the skirting board
in your bedroom.

"There's some extra for you.

"Eight grand, the amount
that I owe you."Oh, my God.

"Old age gives you nothing but
looser shits and bigger regrets."

"I'm sorry that I wasn't better.

"The flat's yours.

"I love you.

"PS: I told people
that your name was Emma

"because I knew it
would drive you bloody mad."

Bastard.

Oh, my God.Whoa, whoa, whoa!
We've got it. We've got the money.

We've got the money!
Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait!

Oh, look what we've got here.

I've got to hand it to you, Erin,
you take after your father,

but you cannot get away
with robbing our pier.

Here's your money.
It's all there, you can check it.

We want double.
For the damage done to the arcade.

There's 18K there. Alright?

You can take it. I don't want it!
You're two grand light.

He'll work it off.He will.
For free.Alright.

And you can hit him. Once.

Not f*cking you!
Why is it always him?

Oi!

f*cking hell!
f*cking hell!

Anything else happens,
and I mean it, anything,

I will come down,

and I'll burn your f*cking pier
to the ground, do you hear me?

He's my brother,

and if anybody's gonna k*ll him,
it's gonna be me.

Damn straight.
Shut up!Will do, Erin.

♪ ODETTA: Hit Or Miss

Thanks, Vin.
No, it's alright.

Listen, man, I lied before.

About not knowing.

I know.

Sarim told me. I just can't believe
you didn't tell me about it.

I'm embarrassed.

I'm gonna be a dad.

And I couldn't even provide for it.

I'm sorry, man.
Listen...

I've gotta run, Vinnie.

OK. I'm not like you.

I can't go to prison. I won't.

What about Sugar and the baby?

It's better for them both.
I know it is.

I don't know, maybe when this has
all d*ed down, I'll come back.

Yeah?

I love you, bud.

Oh, f*ck me.

Why don't you come with me, please?

What? And give birth on the run
in the f*ck truck?

You should've told me.

I could've stopped you
and we could've been...

picking out cots, or whatever we're
meant to be doing right now.

I just...

I wanted everything to be perfect
for you. OK?

For both of you.

I just wanted to provide
and just, like, be a man, but...

You are the best man
I have ever met.

I love you.

Sorry.

What am I gonna do with out you?

A very beautiful couple.

Come on. Come and give us a love
before you go.

Shall we have a sexual dance?

♪ Shall we make it sexual?

♪ Very, very sexual

♪ Let's have a sexual... ♪

TOMMO: Avanti!
Get out of it, you pig!

Into the distance.

: I tell you what.
: What?

I can't believe
you've got a second house.

I know.
Maybe it's better I weren't there.

Oh, stop fishing.

God, it was good though.
Mm.

I've gotta start
doing some stuff for myself.

What kind of stuff?

Just stuff.

I got you a present, actually.

Here.

It's got a bit squashed now.

What is it?
It's a jam doughnut.

Aww.

That's probably the last
one in the world, that.

You're a heart-breaker.

♪ SHACK: As Long As I've Got You

♪ Morning paper soaking from the rain

♪ And Kilroy's hair's turned blue

♪ Feed the cat, the fish,
the dogs the same

♪ I'm soaking through and through

♪ All through this winter time... ♪

:
'16 things I'm gonna f*cking do

'even if someone tells me I won't.

'Start my own business.'

Bad...sh*t.

List, right.

Fear...of...change.

Loneliness.

Dylan...has...gone.

My own...stupid...head.

Good...stuff.

Erin.

Tyler.

: 'Write a book about a girl
talking to a horse.

'Fall in love with someone
from Paris.

'Big one. Travel the world.'

Aahhh!

I couldn't help overhearing you've
got a bad case of Rattus rattus.

There's only one man can fix this.
He's a bit of a twat.

Fellas.He's got hooks
on the f*cking ceiling.

He's not a m*rder*r.
Ahhh!

Ohh!

♪ SIR JOE QUARTERMAN:
So Much Trouble In My Mind

f*ck you! f*ck you!
You f*cking can't catch me!

♪ I got so much trouble in my mind

♪ I got so much trouble in my mind

♪ Give me the strength to carry on

♪ Give me the strength to carry on

♪ Cos everything I got
is just about gone... ♪