01x03 - As the World Sa-Turns

[bunniefuu]

♪♪

♪ I like that, yeah ♪

♪ I like that ♪

♪♪

It's my job
as your debate teacher

to try to get you
to think outside the box,

so think about it this way.

Would you rather own
a tropical island --

Island.
I want to own an island.

You didn't let me finish.

Would you rather own an island

or donate those billions
to Feeding America?

Well, I've already committed
to the island thing, so...

I'm also for Luke
moving to an island by himself,

far away
from everyone.

[ Chatter, knock on door ]

Sorry to interrupt.
Quick question.

Anyone interested in starring
in a production

of the greatest alien love story
of all time --

"As the World Sa-Turns"?

It's my original piece
I am writing and directing

for our school's annual musical
in a week.

Who's in?

Oh,
I would say yes,

but my mom
told me to stop lying.

Quick question --
[ Chuckles ]

could I join,
do very little work,

take very much credit,
and put it on my college résumé?

Super smart idea --

which is why
I'm already doing it.

So I have a quesh.

No,
teachers can't audition.

Hey, but could they
if they sang

a showstopping ballad
like "Chandelier" by Sia?

Oh, I wish,
but rules are rules.

Too bad
it's just for students.

Ah, damn it.

I would have
been amazing.

♪♪

♪ I'm gonna swing
from the chandelier ♪

Miles: ♪ Like tomorrow
doesn't exist ♪

Why does my echo
sound better than me?

♪ Exist ♪

♪ I'm gonna fly ♪

♪ Like a bird
from the night ♪

Oh, my God.

Miles,
you have to audition

for Mr. Escalante's
musical.

I'm more of a sing-in-the-shower
kind of guy.

[ Gasps ] You should shower
in front the whole world.

What?

I'm pretty sure
I'm supposed to be

helping you reach
your full potential.

You shouldn't hide that talent.
Come on. What do you say?

You're gonna keep pressuring me
until I audition, right?

You're really
getting to know me.

I will not stop.

I guess
it'd be kind of cool.

Yes,
another win for Alicia.

You know, this calls for
a celebratory duet.

From the top.

♪ I'm gonna swing ♪

Miss G!

Can you keep it down?
It's my free period,

and I'm trying
to watch my stories.

♪♪

So, as you know,

I made an app
that rates your status updates

before they go out

as good, problematic,
or don't do it,

but I -- [chuckles]
I think it's broken

because every time
I use it,

it keeps saying,
"Problematic."

Hey, Sarah, uh,
quick question.

Are you free tomorrow
after swim practice?

Well, I was gonna
rearrange the letters

on the school marquee
into a series of curse words.

You know,
girl stuff.

[ Chuckles ] Cool.

Um, I was just wondering
if you were interested

in hanging,
maybe over coffee?

Yeah,
I'd really like that.

I'll see
you all later.

Dude!

You finally set a time with her,
one-on-one.

Um, chest bump.

You know, touching fronts
is not as cool as you think.

What? You're not happy
for Terrell?

No, I totally am.
I never said that.

It's just, uh,

Sarah clearly thinks
you asked her to a group hang.

She said, "I'll see you all
later at the coffee shop."

No, no, no,
no, no, no.

She said, "I will see
you all later,"

meaning, "I will see you
around school,

but I will
see you, Terrell,

for our romantic
one-on-one."

As a man who's paid his dues
on the dating scene,

I think I know.

She said,
knowing full well.

[ Chuckles ]
No, no, seriously. Who?

Um, Robyn,
in the sixth grade.

[ Scoffs ]
Everybody knows that.

We spent the afternoon
at my house

because your mom forgot

to pick you up
from my birthday party.

That is not
a relationship.

For the record,
people told me

you spent the whole party
asking where I was.

Because we were playing
hide and seek.

Yeah, okay, well,
you just tell yourself

whatever it is
you need to hear.

I'm sorry to bring our baggage
into this.

Bro,
what baggage?

There is no --
it ceased to exist.

Guys, guys, guys, if I was
interested in old drama,

I'd watch "One Tree Hill"
with my cousins.

I need to know
what to prepare for --

a hang
or a group hang.

The first.

Okay, I hear
what you're saying,

but I like
what he's saying.

As much
as I can't believe

these words are about
to come out of my mouth,

I got to go
with Luke.

[ Chuckles ]
Excellent choice, my friend.

Chest bump.

Yeah.
Come on.

It was too much bump,
not enough chest.

♪♪

Okay.
My assistant director.

Show me my spaceship.

I think you're gonna be
pretty happy.

Oh, uh, for safety,
just...

So I'm still working out
some of the kinks.

What's wrong?

Nothing. [ Chuckles ]

I guess
in my mind,

this isn't just,
like, a spaceship.

It's, like, a vessel powered by
the hopes and dreams

of two lost alien souls

and their 25
respective hearts.

Um, just remember
the budget was $50.

Anyway,
you know what?

We'll make this work.

Oh, we'll make this work.
Because it's that bad.

Hey, I did not say that.
This is a good job.

I'm gonna make
the greatest alien spaceship

your stupid eyes
have ever seen.

Thank you?

Hi, Makayla.
Okay.

Elliot,
call an OB-GYN

'cause a star
is about to be born.

For the last time,
teachers can't be in the play.

Not me.

But thank you.

Meet your new star.

Hey,
Mr. Escalante.

Hey, Miles.
Miles can sing?

Does my mother
have an opinion on my hair?

Yes.

Miles,
show him.

Hold it right there.

Griffin!
Get in here.

I just cast Griffin
this morning.

Uh, he'd be playing your
love interest, so sing to him.

I want you
to really sell me.

Good luck, Niles.

[ Chuckles nervously ]
It's actually...

No, you know what?
Niles works.

He really
wants to do this.

Okay, love that you're
looking out for him,

but this
is the big time.

It's clearly not.

[ Soft music playing ]

One, two, three...

♪♪

He's -- He's just nervous
I can fix it.

Um, hey, just pretend
we're in the bathroom together.

♪♪

Miles, wait.

Before you think
that's weird,

Terrell was there, too.

♪♪

Sarah is gonna
love you,

but you should
really reconsider

that finishing touch
I suggested.

The monocle?
Do I look like Mr. Monopoly?

This is the guy
you choose to listen to.

Terrell, I'm telling you,
this is a mistake.

She doesn't think
this is a date.

Okay, well,
we're about to find out

who is right
and who is -- wrong!

Oh,
I was so wrong.

She is not
dressed for a date.

No!

Guys, my outfit
has romance written all over it.

What do I do?

How does stripping
help me?

You're practically naked
in the pool every day.

Uh, yeah, Luke,
go run interference.

Terrell, I got you, okay?

Hi, Luke.

What are you doing?

I'm...
thinking of a letter.

Guess what it is.

[ Imitates buzzer ]

The correct answer
was "H."

Think of another one.

Are --

Let me finish.

Are you an idiot?

Terrell!

Now think of a number.
No, no.

Hey, Sarah.

Welcome to
the group hang,

where we all hang
as a group.

[ Chuckles ]

Wow, that is --
that is one fitted...

flannel.

It's a Canadian large.

The sizes don't really
translate overseas.

♪ I like that, yeah ♪

♪ I like that ♪

When I petitioned
for a gender-neutral bathroom,

this isn't
what I had in mind.

What happened yesterday?

I don't know if you realize,
but you didn't sing.

Like at all.

The stupid play
isn't for me, okay?

There's no reason to be scared
of Mr. Escalante.

He is not
a real director.

Yeah,
but I'm not scared of him.

I forgot how to human
when I discovered

I was auditioning
as the love interest

of the Griffin.

So?
What's so great about Griffin?

You're joking, right?
He's smart,

he's funny, and he looks like
a hot teen vampire,

but without
all the teen-vampire drama.

I get it.
You like Griffin.

Obviously.
Everyone likes Griffin.

Okay, so you get to play
opposite him in a musical.

Dude,
that's great.

All due respect,
Ms. Gomez,

but you're
out of your element,

Griffin could have any guy
he wants at this school.

There's no way
he'd choose me.

Ugh.

Miles,
don't sell yourself short.

We've all been there.

We've all
been forced to sing

in an alien musical
with our crush?

Look...

when I was
in high school,

I was madly in love with
this gorgeous senior named Jake,

and on my 16th birthday,
which my dad forgot,

he found out I liked him
and --

And he pulled up
in his red Porsche

after a school bus
pulled away.

I've seen
"Sixteen Candles."

Damn you
for being an old soul.

I mean, really,
who knows

how many opportunities
I've lost out on

'cause I was scared --
roller coasters, getting bangs,

going in the drive-thru
at 1:00 a.m.

You could still do
all those things.

You could still do
the musical.

It's true.

I've always dreamed
of being in a musical.

So what do I do?

I mean,
I really blew that audition.

[ Chuckles ]
Yeah, you did.

Don't worry. I got you.
I'll -- I'll think of something.

Please don't.

You're right!

I'm better
when I wing it!

♪♪

My other spaceship's
a hybrid.

So...

Griffin,
no more ad-libbing.

Elliot, you need to give Miles
another sh*t.

I'd love to,
but clearly,

this moment
is too big for him.

The play
opens tomorrow,

and no one else
has auditioned.

He's got the part.

Yes.

You're not gonna
regret this.

Oh, my God,
I'm his manager now.

Do you pay me directly
or --

Just Venmo me.

I already regret this.

♪♪

[ Slurping ]

[ Sighs ]

Look at us, a bunch
of friends being friends,

hanging out
at a coffee shop.

It's like the show.
Um, uh...

"Friends."

Okay, uh, Robyn,
care to join me

to get
some more coffee?

[ Chuckles ]
Oh, thank God.

Should've worn
the monocle.

Hit me.

Can you
keep a secret?

"Keep" is
a strong word.

When Terrell
invited me here,

I kind of just thought
he meant the two of us.

Oh.

So like one on one,
like romantically.

Yeah, I thought it was
pretty clear what he meant.

I mean, I guess he just wanted
the cringe fest in there.

[ Chuckles ]
You'd be surprised.

Signals do get crossed
a lot.

Yeah,
by idiots.

Hey, let's not play
the blame game.

Just give me
two seconds, please.

Hey, guys,
so we have a situation.

Sarah kind of
just wanted it to be a...

[softly] one-on-one.

What was that?

[ Normal voice ] You know,
she wanted it to be

her and Terrell and us,
just without us.

Wait, so she wanted
what I wanted.

And I was right
and you were wrong?

And now
I've ruined my chances?

This is a disaster.

Luke is back,
baby!

This calls for
an I-told-you-so selfie.

[ Camera shutter clicks ]

You send that to me
and I will hurt you.

Can you guys please leave so
I can try to salvage this thing?

[ Cellphone chimes ]

I couldn't help myself.

♪♪

♪ Don't listen to a word I say ♪

Stupid ship.

I can't find
the parts to make it work.

I know
you're a perfectionist,

but you don't have to
obsess over this.

You don't need to beg, borrow,
or steal to meet my vision.

So you want me
to steal?

I am 100%
not saying that.

Blink if it's
a yes.

I can't not blink,
Makayla.

Copy that.

Okay. Welcome, Miles,
to your first

and our last rehearsal.

Alright,
so in this scene,

Zalien must tell Gorben-Glop
how he feels

in the universal language
of the cosmos -- music.

What is
this musical about?

I don't know.

I think we're making it up
on the fly.

Cue the orchestra.

[ Soft music plays ]

♪ The said
I couldn't do it ♪

♪ But I'm flying next to you
and ♪

♪ Getting further
from the ground below ♪

♪ Different worlds
brought us together ♪

♪ If I can survive
the weather ♪

Wow,
you wrote this?

Wrote?
It poured out of me.

♪ I'll need your hand
to take me home ♪

♪ I want to go
wherever you go ♪

♪ And just lead me
to space ♪

♪ We can face
what they throw at us ♪

♪ Just don't let go ♪

He is really good.

I know.

♪ I want to fly ♪

Sing it to him.

♪ I want to fly ♪

♪ I want to fly,
take my hand and -- ♪

I'm sorry.

I can't do this.

Mr. Escalante,
I quit.

Told you
this was a mistake.

Music has brought
this galaxy together.

Let's rejoice!

Drip Lord, out.

♪♪

Hey, Sarah, you took off
before we could talk.

Oh, yeah,
I needed to add an "S"

onto "As the World Sa-Turns"
on the school marquee.

"Ass the World Sa-Turns."
I made it "Ass."

[ Chuckles ]
Cool, cool.

Look, the truth is
when I asked you to hang out,

I was hoping
it would just be the two of us.

Yeah, me too.

I mean,
that was more awkward

than when Mr. Escalante
went in for a handshake

and Ms. Gomez
went in for a hug.

[ Chuckles ]
Look, the truth is

I let my friends
get in my head,

which is why
from now on,

I'm gonna be
as direct as possible.

Cool.
I'm listening.

Alright.

Hanging.

Musical.

Solo.

Yeah,
you feel me?

Is that the most direct
you can be?

Well, if it's so easy,
you try it.

Sure, "Sarah,
I would love

to go to the musical with you
one-on-one."

I don't hear
a difference.

Alright, well,
what do you say?

I'd love to.

[ Bell rings ]

What's in the cart,
Makayla?

Nothing.

Definitely not stealing supplies
from the robotics lab

to build
a sick-ass spaceship

to rub
in Mr. Escalante's stupid face.

I was never here.

We're already gone.

♪♪

Miles,
are you okay?

No.

I told you Griffin
wasn't into me,

and that rehearsal
just confirmed it.

I'm sorry.

I-I don't know what's
going through Griffin's head,

but what I do know is that
you are an incredible singer.

Game recognizes game.

That last part really undermined
the compliment.

Look, if Griffin
doesn't like you,

that's too bad,

'cause after the whole school
hears you sing,

you'll be
out of his league.

No one's gonna hear me

if there's
no co-lead in the play.

Alright,
we'll find another guy,

or maybe I'll throw
some green paint on

and see
where the music takes me.

I'll find
another student.

No need.
It's time I stood up for myself.

♪♪

Hey.

You can't quit a musical
the night before it goes on.

You made a commitment,
so if you have an issue with me

or whatever,
let's just get it over with.

Who says I have
an issue with you?

It's obvious
because you're like...

Griffin!

And I'm like...
Miles.

Yeah,
you're like Miles,

the guy with one of the most
amazing voices I've ever heard.

I was nervous just to be
onstage with you.

What?!

Yeah, I mean,
you've got it all --

an undeniable talent...

great look.

What?!

I guess I do.

To be honest, I was nervous
to be around you, too.

Really?

But I pushed through
because, together, we'd be epic.

Not to mention
the hottest alien couple.

What?!

I'm sorry. It was so much cuter
when you did it.

I've --I'm in.
[ Chuckles ]

Luke:
Where is he?

You!

Ooh, if you think you're
too good for my best friend,

think again.

You're about
to get Luked.

Actually,
it's all good.

Then why --
why did you text me

that the prettiest people
do the ugliest things?

Mnh-mnh.

And this is my cue
to take him away.

Gentlemen.

Get Luked?
Really?

♪♪

[ Applause ]

Good evening,
Meadows Creek High.

Well, I hope
all you theater lovers

enjoy our production
of "As the World Sa-Turns."

[ Cheers and applause ]

♪ I want to fly ♪

♪ I want to fly ♪

♪ Take my hand
and I'll fly with you ♪

♪ I'm gonna fly ♪

♪ Look at me fly ♪

♪ But just don't
let go too soon ♪

♪ 'Cause they can't
bring us back down ♪

♪ When our feet
are touching the moon ♪

[ Cheers and applause ]

Come, Zalien,
let's run away to my spaceship.

Oh, Gorben-Glop,

my 25 hearts
b*at only for you.

[ Cheers and applause ]

♪♪

[ Sighs ]

Come on, Makayla,
you got this.

♪♪

I did it.

I can't believe it worked.

♪♪

Oh, balls.

♪♪

I cannot believe
you blew the power

for the entire East Bay.

Pretty cool,
right?

Totally.

I need
to step up my game.

I'm really
glad you changed your mind

about doing
the musical.

I had a lot of fun,
thanks to you.

Me, too, Gorben-Glop.

We should hang sometime.

What?!

Okay.

Dude,
what a wild week.

I mean, first,
I almost Luked Griffin,

and now he wants to have
a group hang with us.

[ Chuckles ] Bro,
that was clearly a one-on-one.

No, no!
Don't listen to them!