01x01 - Pilot

[bunniefuu]

♪♪

♪ Dy-na-na-na, na-na,
na-na, ayy ♪

♪ Dy-na-na-na, na-na,
na-na, ayy ♪

[ School bell rings ]

I didn't get
any sleep last night.

I was up working
on my coding project.

Turned out good, though.

I already had
swim practice today,

have a trig test later,
and AP French presentation.

Nice!

But French is
a dead language.

Everybody taking Japanese
say "Mochiron da yo!"

Mochiron da yo.

Come on, buddy,
get amped.

Your energy
is down here, right,

and I need it up here.

Ryan Porter's party invites
drop today.

It's gonna be epic.

♪ Ba, ba ♪

[ Humming ]

Bah!

Can you believe
because we're women,

we're gonna earn
17.7% less than Mister...

[ Imitates Luke
humming ]

[ School bell rings ]

"Meet me
in the library"?

Let's go.

Sorry, but, um,
as a rule,

I don't follow
suspicious notes

to a second location,
so...

No, come on, Miles,
I'm curious now.

Hey, Luke, grab the lectern
in case we need it.

You don't get to tell me
what to do.

I'm grabbing it.

♪♪

Alicia: Oh, there's my class!
Welcome to Honors Debate.

I'm your new teacher,
Ms. Gomez,

but call me Alicia,

Or "My Shero."

Little too much?

You probably didn't need
the word "little,"

but yeah.

[ Chuckles ] Okay.

Principal Maris left me
an attendance list,

but I don't know
who's who, so...

I'll start. I'm --

I want to see if I can make
a better second impression

by matching the name
to the vibe.

[ Sighs ] Robyn.

Sounds cool, sounds edgy.

You?

Yeah.

Makes you Makayla?

Yes.

And now
the wall of dudes!

I'm gonna go with
Terrell, Miles, Luke.

That's amaz--
How did you do that?

It's my gift.

That, and she included
your pictures

next to your names.

[ Laughs ]

Gotcha.
I'm really proud of that.

Let's start class.

♪♪

Hey, uh, what happened
to your old teacher, anyway?

Oh, Mr. Stasseson
watched an X Games promo,

went full-on
midlife crisis,

and decided
to try snowboarding.

Did he got a concussion
or break a bone or something?

That depends.
Are teeth bones?

'Cause then,

yeah, all of them.

May I ask a question?
Why are we in the library?

You guys are in traditional
classrooms all day long,

and it's always been
a part of my teaching sell

to, like, switch things up.

Really? Okay.
Where did you teach before?

Nowhere.
This is my first time.

But I'm feeling
really good about it.

Don't worry.
I got this.

So, uh,
FightingFoxesRule.

Okay!

That's
the Wi-Fi password,

so we will teach
ourselves

while you do what all the other
substitute teachers do --

check your 'Gram,

uh, listen to
m*rder podcasts, whatever.

[ Chuckles ]

Hey, dude.

Not a sub.

Permanent teacher
in charge of your grade.

Uh-oh!

Think we got off
on the wrong foot, Ali.

Can I call you Ali?

Absolutely not.

Okay.

According to the syllabus,
you are debating...

cancel culture.

Does anybody want to
start us off?

Always happy
to go first.

Cancel culture originated

to protect minorities from --

Oh, wait, that is the
textbook definition, Terrell.

And I really want to know
how it makes you feel.

Well, it's definitely
making me regret

the whole
"happy to go first" thing.

Look, eventually, somebody's
going to ask you guys

for your personal opinion
on something,

and if you don't have one,

it's gonna bite you GPA junkies
on the ass.

Can she call us
junkies?

Well, you can't leave out
the GPA part,

'cause that
might get me fired,

maybe even canceled.

You see what I did there?

I brought it all the way back.

That was a really good
teaching moment, huh?

And she's sitting
next to me.

Oh, I like to move
around a lot,

so you might want to get
used to it.

Alright. Anybody have
an actual opinion?

All right, fine.
Cancel culture sucks.

Look, I'm captain
of the swim team,

and college recruiters
are all up in my Insta.

I'm always sweatin'
making a mistake,

in or out of the pool.

I'll be back.

So, do you guys feel like,
if you make one mistake,

it's gonna ruin
your whole life?

Are you familiar
with the Internet?

Truth is,
we've worked way too hard

to let anything
jeopardize our futures,

in or out of the pool.

You really like saying that,
don't you?

I really do.
[ Chuckles ]

Okay, but we can't make all
of our decisions based on fear.

Uh, Miles, what is the biggest
risk you've taken this year?

I don't know.

Probably attending class
in the library.

♪♪

[ Grunting ]

Give me my Pop-Tart!

Ms. Gomez.

Principle Maris. Hi.

How is your first day
going?

It actually started out
kind of rough --

You know what?
That's my fault.

I'm not in the mood
for small talk today.

Um, this is from
the Parents' Association.

Ooh, welcome basket.
Nice!

Mm, it's actually
more of a "Warning Basket."

You teach
an advanced elective

full of academically
obsessed teens.

Shocker --

the parents are
even more obsessed.

Like in a good way, right?
[ Chuckles nervously ]

Yes, because obsession is
usually a positive thing.

Anyhoo, um,
all these parents care about

is getting their
oh-so-very special children

into elite colleges.

And if they feel that you're
derailing that in any way,

they're gonna make it
my problem,

which, in turn,
will be your problem.

Hence the Warning Basket.

Enjoy.

Yeah, no,
message received

and processed and...

received.

I couldn't think of
a third word.

I'm so sorry.

You're a little scared of me,
aren't you?

Yes, I am.

That is so sweet.

Look, you have to understand
all the issues

that these young kids
are going through,

but you were one of them
like 10 minutes ago.

I mean...
the way you carry yourself,

your complete
unearned confidence.

Honestly, it's like
you're still one of them.

You don't seem happy
about that.

It's not my favorite.

Still, with your past,

I think you have
a unique ability

to connect
with these kids.

Or not.

In which case,
no biggie,

we'll move on.

[ Chuckles ] Yeah.

Just, like, let me know
either way.

Don't make me like you.
That's not fair.

♪♪

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Miles:
Our names aren't on the list.

No surprise, really.
You and I never get invited.

Okay. I know that this
is a popularity thing.

But I thought I might
pull the invite this year.

After all,
I came back 3 inches taller.

I upgraded my look
to business casual.

My voice is lower.
[ Chuckles ]

[ Deep voice ]
'Sup, Sarah?

FYI, I'm getting
my driver's license

five months
from yesterday.

That exchange went a lot better
in your head, didn't it?

Yes, it did.

Live and ya learn.

I really enjoy her.

[ Normal voice ]
Whatever!

She's missing out,
'cause I'm like Tesla --

my stock is on the rise.

Miles: Hey, guys.

Hey, I just saw the invites.
Are you guys okay?

Yeah, thanks.

It would've been nice
to be included.

If it makes you feel
any better,

I never go to Ryan's
lame-ass parties.

Why?!

If it weren't
for my practice

and physics lab,
I would be there.

Those parties
are epic.

Really? 'Cause you're
talking to our friends

who weren't invited.

Right!

Parties suck.

Yeah.

♪♪

[ Sighs ]

♪♪

Hey.

Just help yourself.

I-I'm much more interested
in hearing how your first day --

Oh, you got gummy worms?!
[ Laughs ]

I'm Elliot.

Hey. Alicia.
What do you teach?

The truth.

Actually, English.

And I also coach J.V. basketball
and supervise the A.V. Club.

So if you need help
with your SMART Board

or your jump sh*t,
I'm your guy.

Wow. You're really into
this teaching thing, huh?

I'm a teacher, so...

yeah.

I just wanted a job where
we could leave at 3:00 p.m.

and still score
health insurance.

You do know you got to
grade papers and homework

after school, right?

You do know
I teach debate, right?

You argue,
you get an A.

Look, I tried the whole
"all work, all day" thing.

It did not go well.

I'm talking like...

[ Imitates expl*si*n,
screams ]

Can't wait to hear
the story.

Mm. You should turn your dial
to disappointment

'cause that story
will never be told.

Look, uh, cool teach
to cool teach,

our job,
it's not like other gigs.

Teaching's a calling.

You can't be great at it
and not get sucked in.

I'm not getting sucked in,
though.

Well, I've heard that before,
but you're like --

you're like a fish

just staring
at a worm on a hook.

You're saying
you're not gonna eat it.

But after a while, you think,
"Um, maybe just a bite."

[ Chuckles ]

I'm not eating a worm,
dude.

Oh, I'm calling you
"early bird,"

'cause you will go to town
on that worm.

Then, uh-oh,
you got a taste for 'em.

Next thing you know,

you're not just giving
a student extra help.

You're taking them
on guided tours

of 18 out of the 21
California missions.

[ Chuckles ]

Oh, my God, Elliot.
Did you actually do that?

[ Mumbles ]
It's not important.

♪ This is gettin' heavy,
can you hear the bass boom? ♪

And that pretty much
sums up cancel culture.

I yield my time.

[ Thud ]

Okay, is Luke definitely
doing our debate conclusion?

Because you can't keep
ending every argument with,

"As a future U.S. Senator,
I know I am right."

You can if it's true.

God, grant me the confidence
of a white man.

Guys, our first
inter-school debate

is not for a couple weeks,
so we don't need to

figure out
who opens and closes yet.

More importantly,
you're all too formal.

You're defeating the purpose
of the casual classroom.

Come on, spread out.
Get comfy.

Extra credit
if you spread out.

Come on!
This library setup is legit.

The water fountain up there --
best one in the school.

The water is ice-cold.

All in favor of making
the relocation permanent.

No way!

Miles,
it was a fake vote.

Did you not hear
how cold the water is?

Sorry.

I just got invited
to Ryan's party.

Nice!

Hey, I'm betting I'll get added
to the list, too.

[ Chuckles ]
Refreshing.

Refreshing.

Found out
why I got neg.

Short Sarah
told Tall Sarah

to tell Ryan's girlfriend,
Vegan Sarah, not to invite me,

'cause on our group text,

I hit "thumbs down"
instead of "haha"

on her joke about oat milk.

Hey, anyone need a refill?

Yes, please.

Still not going,
though.

My parents want me to work
on Model UN with Luke.

Well, y'all know I'm out.

I'm teaching chess club

how to play "Overwatch" tonight
for 100 bucks.

What?
You charged me $300!

That was
the asshat tax.

Wait, my invite says,

"You don't have to come
if you're too busy."

Oof. Um, I'm sorry, dude,
but that sounds like a mom-vite.

Terrell: Whoa, whoa.
Hold on, now.

Does your mom
even know Ryan's mom?

They're yoga besties.

Aww!
Old lady squad goals.

But definite mom-vite.

Hey, skip the party.
Okay?

No, definitely go.
Dude, it is our way in.

Don't take advice
from Model UN over here.

Come on.

[ Indistinct shouting ]

Alicia: Hey, guys.

Shouldn't this be
about what Miles wants?

Hey, how did getting
the invite make you feel?

Uh, psyched, I guess.

Then don't let fear
keep you from saying yes.

Go dance with a stranger.

I don't know,
eat an entire coffee cake.

Unfriend your mom
on Facebook.

Okay, I'm in.

Taking risks.
I love it.

[ School bell rings ]

Alright.
Have a good weekend.

Hey, great job.

Oh, thank you so much.

What'd I do?

Look.

Ryan and his crew
pick on people for fun.

Miles is too genuine.
They're gonna crush him.

Well, you --
you can't be sure of that.

Maybe Miles
will surprise you.

Maybe he'll be strong
and confident and...

strong.

Why can't I ever think
of a third word?

Okay, my shero.

♪♪

No, no.

My hair is way too short
to go out tonight.

Aren't there any parties
like six weeks from now?

You always do this.

What is the worst
that could happen?

I do something stupid.

When I walk home,
I'm so in my head,

I get hit by a bus,

and at my funeral,
my hair is six weeks too short!

This is a big moment
for us, man.

Just this once,
can you try to be optimistic?

Ryan doesn't
want me there.

Nailed it.

Just think of all the hot guys
you'll get to meet,

and when we both
get the invite next time,

think of all the hot girls
who will get to meet me.

Besides, you remember
what Ali said in class?

Not to call her Ali.

[ Scoffs ] That doesn't
sound like Ali.

You can't let fear
keep you from saying yes.

And I need you
to understand,

when fear talks to me,
I listen.

Fear kept me
from getting frosted tips.

Fear is my friend.

Okay. I hear ya.

Forget the party.

[ Sighs ]

You're still gonna make me go,
aren't you?

Yep. You leave in...
30 minutes!

♪♪

[ Cellphone plays "Everything is
Awesome!" ringtone ]

Hey, you've reached Elliott.
This is a live person.

Leave a message.

Hello?

You are so lucky
I'm not the dork police.

Yeah, psht, I've been hassled
by them before.

Hey, uh, do you know

Miles Alvarez's
social media handle?

I gave him advice --

So, you are at home
on your own time,

and you're worried
about a student?

Would you like some Sriracha
with that worm?

They're much better spicy.

I'm not worried.

Admit it,
or I won't help you.

Okay, you don't have to.
I'll help you anyway.

Miles and I follow each other
on Insta.

Hold up. My iPad's still
connected to the SMART Board.

Oh, my God!

It's 7:00 on a Friday.

Are you still at school?

No! What are you
talking about?

I'm at the club.
[ Imitates dance music ]

Turn that music down!

Okay, fine. Yes.
I'm here, okay?

Just text me
when you find his info, okay?

Okay, done and done.

Call me abacus,
'cause you can count on --

Hello?

♪♪

Oh, Miles promised
he'd livestream the party.

Do you mind
if we take a break?

Even though
it's Friday night

and we're studying
for Model UN,

I want to do this
forever.

Get it.

Okay.

I'm here.

Waving hello to no one.

Hey.

And now I'm leaving.

Alvarez, you came!

Wow.
That sweater is green.

Bro, you look like
Pickle Rick.

Pickle Miles.

Wow.

I do not like
that Ryan at all.

I got to go tell
my mom.

She'll be stoked
you're here.

Mom-vite -- knew it.

Aw, man! Mom-vite.

Mm, frickin' mom-vite.

Aw, mom-vitation.

Aw, sweetie.

[ Video chat rings ]

What are you doing?

Hiding, thinking about
drowning myself in the toilet.

Alright, dude.
You got to get back out there.

I mean, at Ryan's parties,

there's always guys
playing "Fortnite."

Go show off.
You almost b*at me once.

Nah, I don't think I can.

You just got to own it.

Alright. Work it.
Model faces.

Duck face.

Smize.

Prune.

Alright.
Give me one of the Olsen twins.

[ Laughs ]

[ Chuckles ]

You're ready.
Get back out there.

Ryan is going at your friend
pretty hard.

Oh, no, no.
My boy's gonna turn it around.

Um, no offense,

but why do they call you
Tall Sarah?

It's an old nickname.

In preschool,
I might've been a giant.

-Ohh!
-Oh.

You play claw grip?

Noice.

I've got skills.

They're multiplying.

That's a line from "Grease."

I'm told.

Yo, Alvarez squads up
with me next.

I can't believe
he bounced back.

I can't believe
I'm not there.

I can't believe Ryan
doesn't know "Grease."

You know what?
I'm happy for Miles.

Me too.
[ Chuckles ]

Hey, you know this is
the boys' locker room, right?

Calm down.

Yeah.
Nobody's naked.

You and I might date.

I haven't decided yet.

Wait. What now?

Did y'all hear?

Come on.

Oh, hey, Mrs. P,

I just wanted to thank you
for the mom-vite.

Check out Miles
owning it.

You're chill.

Why do you always
hang around that guy, Luke?

Awesome.

Wait, what?

He texted me twice,

asking if it was a mistake
he wasn't invited,

and then a third time
asking for my mom's number.

That's crazy desperate,
right?

Come on, bro.

Just admit it.

Um...

Yeah, I guess...

sometimes Luke
can be a little...

I don't know...
thirsty.

Crowd: Ohhh!

Verified --

Luke Burrows
is a thirsty boy.

His own best friend.

[ Inhales sharply ]
That's got to sting.

Ohh!

Ohh!

Ooh!

No, dude!

Oooh!

Fart!

So...

Model UN?

What the hell
is a thirsty boy?

♪♪

I really appreciate
you guys checking on me.

Yeah, you know
we got your back.

Plus, I love
these muffins.

[ Doorbell dings ]

[ Door closes ]

Um...

Carol said
you were here.

Who's Carol?

Okay.

"Thirsty"?

How could you say that?

I know.
Just let me explain.

No. I defend you to anybody
who says stuff -- anybody.

Karate class, third grade --
You forgot your gi

and had to wear
your mom's pink shortie robe,

which she keeps
in her purse

for reasons that
we don't want to think about.

People laughed.

I defended you,

but you can't speak up
to that jerk?

You are that desperate
to be at some stupid party?

Quit pretending like
you didn't care about the party.

You only pushed me to go
so that you could have your in,

your "stock's on the rise"
or whatever.

Who says stuff like that?

People who like
financial sector metaphors.

That's who.

Well, guess what?

It's a little thirsty.

You know what, Miles?

That's it.

We're done.
Good luck on your own.

Oh, no.

What am I gonna do?

Are you kidding me,
man?

You are so afraid
of everything.

If it weren't for me,

you would never leave
your house.

♪♪

[ Bell dings ]

♪♪

Did you guys know
that Tall Sarah

is actually shorter
than Short Sarah?

Not the time.

♪♪

[ School bell rings ]

♪♪

No.

Ms. Gomez.

That is
a great color on you.

Is it?

How was your weekend?

You don't like
small talk.

You don't care,
so this feels like a trap.

Well done.

You passed
the first test.

My weekend
was super fun.

Got some texts
from the parents,

and you know
how I love the parents.

Something about
you convincing someone

to go to a party
and thirsty boys.

I told them
you'd handle it.

You're smiling,

but your eyes are chopping me
into little pieces.

Always believe the eyes.

♪♪

[ Sighs ]

If only
someone saw this coming.

Yeah.

[ Sighs ]

Okay, cancel culture. Yeah?
Let's dive back in.

Uh, if someone does
something egregious,

is it okay to call them out
and have them disappear forever?

Anyone want to say
anything?

Anyone?

Just do it!

Um...people
do need to know

that there are consequences
for their behavior.

Especially
if they deserve it.

But who decides
if they deserve it?

Think about it --
is every mistake one and done,

or do people deserve
second chances?

Because that's how we make
change in the world.

Luke?

Miles?

I'll go. Um...

I understand wanting
to cancel somebody

if he said something
stupid and hurtful.

Ow! Okay.

Well, as a future Senator...
[ Chuckles ]

I know everyone deserves
a chance to apologize,

especially since
I didn't behave so well myself.

I can't believe
I said all that stuff.

I was nervous,
and I panicked.

I'm really sorry.

I get it, man.
I do, but...

just to keep it 100,

it's gonna take me a while
to get over it.

I understand.

Okay, over it!
Tell me everything.

Headline -- Ryan's room

is filled with
participation trophies.

It's tragic.

Luke: Next time
you're invited to Ryan's,

I promise I will try
not to make it all about me.

Non-issue,

'cause I'm never
going anywhere again.

Whoa! Whoa!

That's the wrong lesson.

What happened
to taking risks?

Tried it.
It's not for me.

Look, I know that
high school is a minefield.

I mean, your parents
are in your ears.

You have to take
the right classes

and get into
the right colleges.

It's like you have to have

your entire lives
figured out right now

and one mistake could
derail everything --

in or out of the pool.

I feel seen.
[ Chuckles ]

Yeah, it's 'cause I know what
you guys are going through.

No offense, really,

but you have no clue
what it's like.

Look, 10 years ago...

I was you.

I was GPA-obsessed,

all school all the time.

Ugh.

Look, when I graduated
from Yale,

got hired by Google,
my life was supposed to be set,

but I was so focused
on success

that I forgot to figure out
what made me happier,

and it all boiled over
at a morning meeting

that started with me spilling
a mango smoothie on myself

and ended with me crying
on top of a ping pong table,

screaming,
"I don't wanna be here!"

over and over and over.

I'm still trying to get
that thing off YouTube.

Makayla,
please don't look.

I just...

I don't want you guys
to be like me.

I want you to stay open
to new things,

and don't let anybody tell you

what you should be
passionate about,

because that is
for you to decide.

And if you don't,
I promise you...

you're gonna
regret it forever.

How good
was that speech?

I mean, like, an orchestra

should have been playing
behind me or something,

and at least one of you
should have clapped.

Luke, it's too late.

Felt it
when I did it, Ali.

Okay. I am filling up
my water bottle,

and then we are actually

gonna get into the next
debate topic,

'cause I am supposed to
teach you guys stuff.

♪♪

I don't wanna be here.

What are you guys watching?

...wanna be here!
I don't wanna be here!

I'm not getting down!
Get off me!

No! No, no, no, no, no, no!

No, no, no, no, no!
No! No! No!

♪ 'Cause I-I-I'm in the stars
tonight ♪

♪ So watch me bring the fire
and set the night alight ♪

♪ Hey! ♪

♪ Shining through the city ♪

♪ With a little funk and soul ♪

♪ So I'mma light it up
like dynamite, whoa oh oh ♪

♪ Dy-na-na-na, na-na,
na-na, na, na-na-na ♪

♪ Life is dynamite ♪

♪ Dy-na-na-na, na-na,
na-na, na, na-na-na ♪

♪ Life is dynamite ♪

♪ Shining through the city
with a little funk and soul ♪

♪ So I'mma light it up
like dynamite, whoa oh oh ♪

♪ Dy-na-na-na, na-na,
na-na, ayy ♪

♪ Dy-na-na-na, na-na,
na-na, ayy ♪

♪ Light it up like dynamite ♪