01x39 - Duncan Disorderly

[bunniefuu]

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Chef: Alright. Listen up!

Anyone of you -

anyone at all- need to pee?

All: (singsong) No Chef.

- Are you sure?

- Would we lie to you?

- Stop using props to make your point, Duncan.

- Fine.

- Okay. Some rules before we go on our neighbourhood walk.

Rule one, be on your best behaviour!

- Ha.

- I do not want another incident like last time.

- Hey, those animals at that petting zoo

exploded all on their own!

- (Horrified) It was snowing fur.

It was snowing fur! (Screams)

- Great. You re-traumatized Bridgette!

Why do you always have to make my job

so much harder than it already is?

- What? Your job's not hard.

You hang out with kids all day.

Guess what? So do I.

Where's my pay cheque?!

- (Growls)

(Sighs) This is the hardest job I've ever had,

and I've had a lot of jobs.

A lot!

♪♪♪

Ahhhh!

(Electricity fizzles) Ahhhh!

- Meow.

- (Gasps)

(Panting)

(Flames crackle) - Meow.

- (Panting)

- Meow. (Screeching meow)

- Alright, everyone grab hold of the walk-rope,

we're movin' out!

- Why am I tied to the walk rope?

- You know why!

- The answer to my escape was in front of me all along.

Cut the rope!

Once I do that, it'll officially become 'Duncan day'!

Freedom here I come!

I did it... I did it!

I did it! Beth: Did what?

- What are you two doing here?

- We're holding the walk-rope. - We were behind you.

- Where is everyone? Where's Chef?

- Of course! Yes.

I'll get you back to Chef, sneak away,

and get back to my day of freedom.

Now let's move!

With all that dead weight slowing Chef down,

he couldn't have gotten too far!

- Yep. We're lost.

- (Sad) I'm gonna have to live in the sewers again,

aren't I?

- Cody, no!

- Without Chef, there's no adult.

And with no adult, everything up here is scary!

Ahhhh! Everything down here is scary!

- Stop it! You're ruining 'Duncan day'!

Just relax! I can be the adult.

(Gasp) Woo-hoo!

Look, a wallet!

It's full of money! Score!

Guys, this is gonna be the best 'Duncan day' ever!

- Now let's learn about nature!

That's a tree. Tree.

That's another tree.

That used to be a tree.

And this old man looks like a tree.

- Uh, Chef. Where's the little dude's room?

I've gotta go.

- What? Oh no! Shhhhh!

You've gotta keep it quiet or everyone will have to go.

- Who has to go? I have to go too!

- I didn't have to go, but now I do.

- I don't actually need to go, but I'm always happy to try!

- Shhh! All this talk about "going"

makes me really need to go!

- Quick, to the porta-potty!

(Buzzing)

Quick, to somewhere else!

Flo: And where do you all think you're going?

Washroom's for paying customers only!

- Fine. I'll take a cup of coffee.

That makes you a paying customer, not them!

(Sad groans)

Anyone using the washroom is gotta order something.

- I want bacon.

- Chocolate milkshake, please.

- I'll have a croissant; I love Italian food!

- I'll have an egg white omelette,

brown toast, no crust.

And I'll take that with a fruit salad instead of home fries.

Thank you.

- (Exasperated exhale)

- So what's our plan for 'Duncan day'?

- Uh. I was just gonna chill, maybe go to the--

- Beach!

- Huh. Yeah. My thoughts exactly!

(Eating sounds)

- Alright, we're all customers,

now who needs to use the washroom?

- (Farts) I think it was just gas.

(Farts)

Yup, totally just gas.

- None of you need to go now?

- And the tip is not included, so...

- (Sighs)

Uh, kids, have you seen my wallet?

- I saw it fall out of your pocket four blocks ago, dude.

- What? Why didn't you say anything?!

- I dunno.

- Uhhhhm. Heh...

So, here's the thing...

(Grumbles) This was suppose to be a nice,

quiet walk in the park.

(Rat hisses)

Flo: Better scrub faster if you wanna work off those meals!

Oh! And this is your new kitchen manager.

- Courtney? You don't work here.

- Really? 'Cause it looks like you're the one

that's not working here.

- Yeah, I guess this'll be okay.

I'm just gonna kick back and relax!

(Relaxed exhale)

- I'm hungry. - I'm thirsty!

You wrecked my sand castle!

- Hey! You got sand in my pants!

- Well, that's what you get for being a big doofus!

- I know you are, but what am I?

- A doofus!

- I know you are, but what am I?

- Hey Duncan! He threw sand-- - Aaarrrghhhh!!!

Would you two quit it?!

- Stop! Just stop!

Look, I think everyone's a bit tired and hungry.

How about I go and get you a snack?

Both: We want ice cream!

- Fine. I'll get some ice cream.

Some day of freedom!

I'm suppose to be chilling at the beach

not serving a couple of nagging kids!

Beth? Cody?

Beth: Up here!

- Guys! Your ice cream is melting!

Cody: Noooo! Don't let it melt!

- Then come down!

- We can't! We paid for a full hour!

- How did you pay?

- Uh, they said you were paying.

- What?!

Hey Duncan! We're coming down now!

- But I just paid for a full hour!

Beth: Careful! - Ahhhh!

Ugh! - Woo-hoo!

Yeah!

- Ouch! Ahh! Whoa!

Ahhhhh!

(Crying)

- Who wants to hit more stuff?

- I do! - Me too!

- I don't! - Two against one!

- This is suppose to be 'Duncan day'!

Whoa! Ugh!

Ahhhhh! Ahhhhh!

(Pained groans)

- Touchdown!

- Agh! (Spits)

(Groans)

- Woo! This was suppose to be appreciating nature day!

- Hey! If you've got time to lean,

you've got time to clean!

- Wha-bu!

But I just washed all these dishes!

- I'm not paying you to complain.

- You're not paying me at all!

I'm working off your meals!

- That's it. You're on bathroom duty.

- Okay. You guys gotta stop spending so much of my cash.

It's almost gone!

And you two go around as if I'm made of money!

No more! Got it?

(Sigh) I guess you can choose what we do next.

Both: Really? We want to go to the zoo!

- I'm cool with the zoo. Sure! Both: Yay!

- But no souvenirs!

- Thanks for buying us each something

at the gift shop Duncan.

- Like you gave me a choice!

You threatened to jump into the bear pit if I didn't!

Beth: Oh no!

I dropped my Sally safari doll.

Duncan, can you go get it?

(Snap)

- You want me to get your doll...

in the alligator pit?! No way!

- Then I'm telling Chef every thing.

- Wait-just-aw come on!!

linked sausages, please.

When I say pull me up - pull me up!

(Splash)

Phew!

(Throwing grunt) - Oh Sally, you're alive!

- It's safari time!

It's safari time! - (Waking growl)

(Low snarl)

- (Panicked) Pull me up!

- Is she okay? - She seems okay.

Duncan: Pull me up!

- Close call though. - You can say that again.

Duncan: Pull me - aaaaahhh!

- She for sure needs a wash though.

- And then she'll be good as new.

Duncan: Ahhh! Ahhhhh! OOF!

- Chef, this isn't working out.

We're gonna have to let you go.

- What? I don't even work here!

- We're gonna need that uniform back.

- It's my shirt! - Yeah...

- We're gonna need it. - Gotta go!

- (Angry groan)

- We're going back to the school!

All: Awwwwwww!

- Are we gonna pass a bathroom on the way?

I gotta go!

(Screeches to a halt)

- Today has been one thing after another.

I am done! I try and I try and it doesn't matter.

- Uh, are we--

- Not another word until we're back at school!

(Pained moans, falling thud)

- That's it. I am done.

We're going back to school.

- We don't want to go back! - No fair!

- We finally tasted freedom!

- Hanging out with you kids is bad enough;

being in charge you? Worst job ever.

Chef: (Groaning)

(Tired exhale)

Man, am I tired!

My dogs are barking.

(Pulsating throbs)

- Tell me about it!

- (Sighs) Those kids put me through the ringer today!

- I don't know how you do this every day.

Looking after kids is the worst!

Chef: Wait a minute, where were you?

Duncan: Don't worry about it, man.

By the way, here's your wallet.